Matt Braunger

00:00four three two one boom Matt you're the first guy to ever bring homemade cold brew yes sir to the studio yeah it's uh it's it's it's pretty much kerosene so you want to sip it be careful usually yeah I usually dilute it with a little bit of water Wow yeah I got this found out about this guy it's company called Cristero or it's a guy and he just roasts all these beans from all over the world and drops them off at this one bicycle cafe and no no I live in Los Feliz close close enough cheers about here thanks for having me my pleasure I had a coffee expert on the podcast before just start it I mean I don't know anything about coughing just on a whim because this guy Peter Giuliano that's his name Giuliano or Giuliani I'm avoiding the word Giuliani but he's like a legit coffee expert he explained us that all coffee comes from Ethiopia oh really yeah all of it came

01:07out of there that's what that's like okay and then they started growing in Latin as a kid Colombian coffee was coursing like yeah he still went to Colombia over the summer and you still see pictures and drawings of him everywhere because like yeah because he brought kind of fame to Colombia and and differentiated it from out the other South American countries yeah well this guy it was really fresh this is actually very good cold oh cool very tasty Thanks interesting it's a different flavor yeah I mean cold brew coffee you take at least 70% of the bitterness out and it makes it smoother and there's no acidic and you don't get that that's the stomach sourness you get when you drink a big pot of hot coffee you know I usually don't get that I'm okay with coffee but I do like the flavor of this this is really good okay this is Ethiopian mm-hmm yeah I just I'm no

02:00expert I just go what's the best one to make cold brew and they pointed a bag and I buy it and that's all you know smart yeah just defer to experts yeah that's kind of the key to life I think but he was a Giuliani Giuliano sorry Peter he was explaining to us that the reason why they all have these different complex flavors and how they how they would take care of the beans because Ethiopia is a very dry climate whereas South America is very hot so they developed all these problems with coffee rust you ever heard of coffee yeah developed like weird molds and stuff that's why they had to figure out different ways of processing and wet processing is versed to just leaving them out and drying them oh wow yeah did you talk about the illegality of coffee and it's kind of earlier stages when it would go out into different regions and cultures and religious areas well

02:49Bourdain actually was the first person to tell me that that they were outlawing coffee shops and coffee houses back in the day see there's a clip somewhere online of Bourdain explaining to us okay how coffee shops were being outlawed because at the time everyone basically was drunk all day because people just they all they did was drink booze because you know a lot of times if you had water sitting around that water would probably have some funky and it was still water and you'd get sick drinking it but you could be you know if water had the alcohol in it you wouldn't get sick it's a preservative yeah like monks would only drink beer yeah and like crazy it's not I can't imagine if you've ever had like Belgian 3 I'm just like okay Jesus you think those guys just pacing themselves all day to stay somewhat hydrated and yeah I think they just got used to it it must

03:42have been terrible for their body yeah that's nice thinking it's like oh I was just thinking about like life expectancy and how like now I feel like we're gonna see people living well into their hundreds and stuff and like our generation and younger but back then you're just like you're 30 alright you should make a whale man because it's well it's just if anything went wrong you were done we're just like I have a lot of friends that had their appendix taken out right or they broke a leg hiking yes they managed to get okay leave you know the wolves don't come after the rest of us and just take one for the team if your appendix went you were just possessed by demons nobody knows what the happened yeah you just struck dumb and like just fall down this is it out from the inside yeah one knew why and the amount of the amount of heard the statistic that like something like

04:28eighty percent of medieval land land battles were fought drunk or something something some insane ratio yeah I would I would have to shotgun a bottle of Jack to pick up like a battle ax and just run into a crowd of guys and just are swinging away well the Vikings were famous for waging war while they were on mushrooms they would eat psilocybin mushrooms and just go banana maybe he Amanita muscaria to I think was the other mushroom that they ain't and they would just go crazy with axes while they were who knows what they were seeing he would say that the legend of the Berserker yeah where we had the term berserk for all you're obviously familiar you're a warrior philosopher so you know that is but like yet that's probably what you just go into a trance yeah and you're just killing everything inside and you're basically like a an insect on cocaine that's just chopping

05:18everything down around you yeah you remember we were talking about that new Viking show that's on Netflix we missed it it wasn't the comedy one there's another one there's another one that's a like a serious Viking show on Netflix that's supposed to be like the show Vikings but way better which I kind of like the show part yeah it was good good it was good it's funny though how you don't give me the last Kingdom that's where I'm so you know we we focus on one thing and where it's like you look you watch the Vikings you're like where are the hats where the helmets with the horn these braids everyone has they all they they should all be monsters but it's not Vikings were all sizes yeah right well they were all big like these the problem is like there's not that many giant actors unless you want to recruit football players you know yeah but if you go to Holland or something like that one of

06:13the things you walk right you go guys everyone's big that's a good point yeah in in norway norwegian countries they're very tall the median height is like 6 feet which is insane well iceland has a disproportionate number of strongmen competition winners those guys who wouldn't strongest man in the world you know let's do this throw barrels of yeah those guys a lot of those guys come from Iceland mm-hmm well the guy who plays the mountain yes who took strongest man in the world yeah title he he for sure is he is you like if you saw that guy coming over a hill on a horse when I stopped existing day my clan gets wiped out or that thing where they to save to save lives they'd be like our champion fights your champion and then that person wins and then that guy comes out and you're like yeah I was so good back in the in the in the knife gym that we trained in but this guy well that was the

07:14saddest part about Game of Thrones that uh the cocky bisexual guy oh the red Viper he was ahead I dude I I was broken up with my my now wife and just was just back from a weekend on the road and was hungover and was just like I'll watch Game of Thrones and I just tweeted like AG I watched I've still have it don't tell me what happens you know blah blah blah just just to have some connection with the outside world you know in my one-bedroom apartment and I walked and people like don't watch it alone I was like what and I watch and it just ruined me cuz it's so up he's screaming I raped his sister he's crushing man the way he did it - he just grabbed his head and it killed him like you would kill a chipmunk it's like the worst death yeah I've probably seen on screen and I've seen a lot of bad horrible screaming deaths you know like it was worse than like the guy in Saving Private Ryan

08:08where he's like wait wait wait no no when the guys just stuck in the knife in like this right here Oh brutal yeah it's also looks possible yeah well I think it's it's it's it's something you write in a fantasy novel like I don't know how someone could have hands that strong yeah you're right what am I saying is it strongest in the world if anyone has hands that strong it's yeah for sure eyeballs first it's a grim head yeah don't you think you could do that to a baby oh I mean you couldn't but you could physical right yes you could took over my math right wait what did I say I was talking to a friend of mine and she was telling me that her dad had been hospitalized and while her dad was hospitalized he was in like this care home for older people and a guy who was schizophrenic well freaked out and tried to eat him Oh God while he was there oh yeah and then he

09:17said this get me out of here any wound up dying at home you want him dying at home rather than die in the hospital because a guy tried to eat him imagine like your last couple days of life yeah are escaping a schizophrenic guy who got out of his room tried to eat this is why I work so hard all my life and raised a family and now I'm here I mean that's already the worst fears to be to die away from your loved ones just were strangers to be back at the first day of high school basically but you're old and everyone's old but then someone's trying to kill you yeah and they eat you Jesus we don't we don't get rid of people like that quick enough like you know you get rid of bad dogs dogs bite people you like you put him back dog put him dog yeah yeah it's what I should I got to tell my mother that because she works with this group called the village which creates a network in

10:00any given neighborhood where if you're young or you're old you register it and cause anything and basically this person can live out there their final years in their home because they have a network of neighbors who check on them like every couple hours or call me here's my cell that's like I'm having a chest pain okay cool let's just get you to the hospital because it's like I think people deserve to you know as long as you're not eating people you're killing them they can die in their homes yeah yeah that's a that's a concern that you really don't ever want to address until it's too late the the concern of when and how do I go yeah you know I mean you have to accept that you're gonna go and some people just have a really hard time with that sure even deep into their old age when they're just decrepit and they can't make it anymore they just can't handle the fact that it's all gonna end

10:46no no I mean it's that's why you have to live your life to the fullest and not bite your tongue and just be yourself because I guess or I just chill the out and wait for the end what do you do one of the two I don't know what is the life to the fullest right yeah if it's all temporary sure absolutely I mean there there is that point where it's a psyche well is there any point to life I don't know I've gone back and forth to Russell on this yeah I'm just like Duncan yeah yeah Duncan will send you down a rabbit hole with that man well he is the cosmic trickster without a doubt IRA Bourdain speaking Bourdain he was that he was saying they're like how would you like to go and he was just like I just want just one bullet in the back of my skull and it'll see a comment yeah but meanwhile he did it himself yeah just I was friends with them I did me me up I wasn't and I I was a fan of his

11:45since the first article came out in The New Yorker that he wrote it you up because you just go I wish he called me yeah I wish I mean I would have flown to France mm-hmm no I wouldn't know Oh does it suck it out don't kill yourself in France you wish you would have checked in I mean it's all about perspective there are times where ever we've all come close to not necessarily putting a gun in our mouths or a rope around our necks but where you just feel like there's no point yeah no but someone can just come in I I say like coming up in the in the crew that I came up with in Chicago you know Kinane and Hannibal and and and people like we we never let each other get away with it's just like yeah you're saying that but right you like you need those people in your life I'll never forget I went through a horrible breakup and I went I was in my apartment for like a

12:32week only leaving to wait tables in bar 10 and then I finally came to a show and contains like hey look who pushed aside all the clumps of used Kleenex be with us welcome back you and I'm laughing so hard and it all went away it all went away yes cuz you take yourself so seriously never gonna get better I mean I just think about despair as this demon that latches onto your back and it's your job to it up is it off you you know what what's your thing if I destroy to fight the and you conquer your inner yeah yeah you're gonna I usually when I'm referring to your inner pitch I mean the inner that doesn't want you to work out yes well that's that's that's the one I relate to the most where did I feel that every time I'm in a class every time I'm in yeah like that it's just like something and you're just like I just want to say I'm baguette you're saying but just this

13:22time well I mean everybody how's that yeah I still have it but I've got that on lockdown and I'm good now I own him good he's in there though he's weak you never see he's always trying to tell you you don't you could take the day off maybe your ankles sore maybe you feel a little sick you little rundown you know take a take a you day the dog looks tired he doesn't even want to run you know it's not about you you should take care of that dog dog does not want to run my dad says something brilliant on the floor of my dad lately like he's always been like a guy no words you mentioned like hospice living and stuff my dad used to do hospice and he he would just he was like do I have to talk the guys like no you can they just mostly wanted someone to listen he's like I can do that and so it's it by dying people and just not his head and stuff and but he never he never talked

14:09about it where I'd be like dad what you doing today is like I'm and go hang with Bill like dad who the is Bill as this guy's dying like dad you got to tell me more than this so now we're kind of he's opening him up more but long story long he was like you know and you're waking up in the middle of the night there's that voice in your head that is telling you you're useless yeah you haven't done enough with your life and things like that he's like I don't know if there is a devil but if there is that's him a nothing and it just blew my mind or and it's like dad you're right that voice that tells you to give up that voice it tells you like not to not to you know to hate yourself and you know and don't think you're worthy well then it's such a weird pattern right because it doesn't have any real evolutionary benefit yeah what is the benefit of self-loathing and

14:53uh-huh and just sitting around feeling pity yeah yeah there there are plenty people in situations that are gonna kick the out of you in life anyway why do I do it to yourself but yeah but there's something good about feeling very disappointing yourself yeah then it makes you work harder and like recognize or at least try to realize your potential better and you get more done you feel better about yourself yeah absolutely yeah there's definitely something there so you know especially if you're you're in competitive sports or something like that where you just there's nothing you hate than losing right good cuz otherwise you won't work as hard yeah Jamie was talking about Kobe Bryant about what a psycho he was when he was playing and they always say that about Michael Jordan and of course Mike Tyson was like that Kobe said he learned it from Michael that's like what he passed

15:39on interesting and Kobe passed it on a LeBron yeah I heard LeBron spends 1.5 million dollars a year on recovery recovery just recovery I just like cryotherapy massage a million and a half every year yeah what a stud he's like maximizing everything like a perfect example someone's máxima yeah freak genetics powerful will intelligence but then on top of that maximizing everything yeah built a school has a good sense of humor but himself yeah he's an actor yeah you know he was so funny in was it no I wasn't wrecked the Amy Schumer movie trainwreck it was I was half right yeah did you ever see that HBO show where they're sitting around with him barbershop yes yeah he's great in that and you get that insight it's like oh that's why you're so good you're crazy like he was talking about his son playing and he's talking about his mom and like he's just his his Drive and you know he

16:48doesn't he doesn't let anything go it's fascinating to me yeah the people like that are like extreme winners are there there's such a rare person yeah and it's and it's rare that you could probably stand to be around that yeah that's you know especially like you're you're kind of you're your tech billionaires or something that it's like after a while you'd be like you know I'm I'm gonna go to the comedy store and and we're gonna yeah break each other's balls for a while cuz this is weird man right like Steve Jobs yeah known by everyone as a extreme yeah right he was just a there's no way around it yeah brutal do you remember that video there's a video it's a he's demonstrating an apple product and he can't give this camera to work and he's pressing on these buttons it doesn't work and he throws it at the engineer with dislike pursed lips haha he's like here you fix it

17:37uh-huh see if you can get it work they just once you loser I'm in front of a million people yeah and he can't I can't lose his mind because it's it's like that Japanese ethic of the person who loses their temper first loses right no matter who's right or wrong I'm sure he loses his temple privately Oh without a doubt that guy whoever it is watch this so he can't get it to work like my camera's not turning on what's that I did slide it let go angry I'll turn it on but to sleep okay please like this yeah he's he's this close to wrote the Roman Emperor throw him in the boiling pit you gotta think Jeff Bezos is like that too right and and just to be the richest man in all of the world's not real he's not really the richest man in all the world he's the richest man who has a publicly declared income ah there's a big difference in him really good yeah it's probably a drug cartel a hundred

18:45percent well no cartels I don't think they have that kind of money but I think for sure Saudi Arabia and yes princes and Middle Eastern income Yeah right they have trillions yeah yeah yeah yeah yes different don't talk about that those guys don't talk about the either uh-huh they let Bill Gates take the rap sure meanwhile they own like whole countries it's almost like how people people that have that people that I went to college with I was around that their family they came from money mm-hmm they never showed it of course they always wore bummy clothes you know but like someone who was acting like they had money to have like a Dunhill lighter or something Rolex or something fancy but like it that's that's that's those countries yeah the kid with the scuffed up gym shoes that you're like man I know michael milken's your dad dude I know he's your dad right

19:36I was to play with this kid and I was oh really yeah I think he was kind of like it's kind unnerving for him yeah he's a good guy I don't know how much contact you had with his dad but it was just like your dad's the junk bond King right now he's your dad the junk bond your dad the whole reason why you're getting by so smoothly and the walls are so greased for you it's life as your dad was a human scumbag yeah folk full-on with wealth there's always a displacement someone's rich because other people are poor on some level but that was the most direct summation always the case like how about this like Beyonce is Beyonce rich because someone's poor or is Beyonce rich cuz she talented and she worked or no listen don't get me wrong I don't think it's it's it's across the board like that but I just think and turn a lot of ways a lot of ways yeah not no way not every time right people love

20:23to say that yeah of course like you sure okay the Jennifer Lawrence a bunch of people over where she's just really good at actually she's amazing yeah yeah are you sure the disparity of wealth is because someone's out there being evil or that she's just really good right what and the thing that gets me is that they always dump on those people the public figures the people export especially biggest example are like like sports figures where like I mean should he do that much for a fight it's like are do people want to watch you fight did you get that much money lol Rizal fight emotive doctor for a million dollars that's my favorite you don't say that uh I'd get punched by Mike Tyson for a million dollars yeah first of all you'd have to get enough people that want to pay to see you get now just so you don't get worth a million just see you lose your life yeah quite

21:10frankly Richard Lewis said that joke about his uncle I remember when I was a kid now I'm watching a TV and like laughing till I cry where he said oh yeah I think was Tyson actually he's like yeah I'd fight him for a million he's like yeah like anyone who paid 300 bucks to seat at Madison Square Garden and see an old Jewish guy get punched once in the face and cry so specific he wouldn't even be crying he'd be drooling yeah you wouldn't be a blues happier intelligent see straight anymore your skull would be broken they'd have to bolt it back together again you'd have to have everyone I love hostage in like a warehouse to let him punch me once dude I when he was here the other day and I was just I've met him before I met him once before took picture with him but me every time you meet him you're like yeah okay okay this is really Mike Tyson he's really here

21:55and I'm shaking hands on him he gives me a hug he's hug like hugging a tree he's like oak tree it's just like funk haha he's just this beast of a man well I remember watching those first fights it was like watching you put a dog in a ring with a wolf yeah every time it was just like they would just run right through everybody yeah to the point where you're like oh he's not from here you know kind of like those comic books where aliens like they're on a planet that has way more gravity but if that happened what's up about that like scientists must get crazy about that because if that happened you would be like really sick like like what people go to space and they're in space for six months like their body breaks yeah you lose like years your life yeah really up it's not go ahead commander Chris Hadfield on the podcast about cool and he said that when he came

22:48back he literally couldn't stand his equilibrium was so up because he'd been in space for six months then he came back like it was horrible he's throwing up like he like he couldn't see straight like when you'd stand the world was all wobbly and yeah because equilibrium was completely gone that's I mean I I think you know superhero movies are kind of fundamentally ridiculous and silly I love comics I grew up on them and stuff but they never they never take physics into account oh really it's always like you get hit with a gamma-ray you get powers right it's like why would it choose to give you powers it would just melt you like that's not how forces in the universe work they don't mmm you know generally speaking mystically you know no never gets enhanced in real life by like nuclear radiation no I don't think that's ever in person ever happened I boat the best theory probably like

23:37Godzilla like some monster was born of it that came out of the ocean yeah there was a time where Vice went to Chernobyl and this was back when vice was really vice when Shane Smith was going all these journey and that was nuts yeah before vice is sort of Vice I mean Vice still does some great stuff but Vice is just this huge multimedia corporation now and back then Shane went to Chernobyl and they were hunting like these radioactive wolves oh my god I do active wolves in Chernobyl and like you know they're mutating there's fish in the water that are enormous and they're weird yeah and you can never eat them they're like the fish near the plant in Simpsons like with three right right exactly yeah but but it's real like they really do have these animals that live in this highly radiated area and they've managed to survive I just I mean the the level the levels that we

24:33that we have taken to get energy yeah and affected our environment we ever drop San Diego mm-hmm you know that ride we drive down and you look to the right hand side oh look a nuclear power plant right it could throw a rock and hit it from the highway what in the is that doing yeah so close to the water well I think it needs to be close to the water for cooling oh yeah that's how they cool the reactor core okay I think that like I know what I'm talking about makes sense yeah there's a there's a nuclear physicist right now nope well that was the Fukushima thing mm-hmm you know that's that's what's happening over there yeah they still don't have that thing under wraps well in debt that volunteer army of Japanese people older than 70 that we're like I don't have long I'll go work there I'll go clean it up they're all going back in time they're all 13 I go there it's a Stephen

25:20King movie broke everybody around it's dead yeah because everyone's throwing rocks some Joe washes yeah maybe they woke up in like 1980 and they go hey guys maybe this isn't a good place for a nuclear power plant steam generators failed in 2013 generators there goes there it is the out of here with that it's over meanwhile that's still there like the core still there they can't move it it's currently in preparation to be decommissioned Jesus how long that takes even that means yeah go fishing around that thing good luck you catch some big fish though no weird they'll have human hands I'll talk to you what but they talk with thoughts Yeah right they just stare at you and enter your mind Fukushima they were doing something where they dug this giant swimming pool and all around this giant swimming pool they dug they put like ice cores they put like some sort of cooling element so

26:26they could freeze all the nuclear waste to an insanely cold temperature Wow didn't work this is like a strategy that they were developing but apparently it fell apart I don't know what the to do it's just you just don't you can't do anything I mean I'd like I gotta do something you got to keep trying we shoot it in a space I don't know yeah well there Artie do you know like I had a friend who I used to live with who was kind of new agey but also conspiracy theory ish and he was he was convinced that our planet was the off-limits zone for the entire universe where every other planet was much more advanced there just like don't go down there all they do is fight and blow things up and there and they don't share with each other and stuff it's just don't that's why no aliens come so all that when people do stuff like that I always feel like they're anthropomorphizing like the idea that

27:18their life would be anything like our life like oh yeah there's a bunch of yeah there's a bunch of care there's a bunch of things that have to be in place for us to get to the point where we're going to war with each other that are people that are over there right there's no war in the ocean ever notice that exactly there's no ocean Wars yeah they don't they don't have and and they're you know they just eat each other yeah and there's normal there's parts of the ocean we can't reach and there's who knows if there's a there's a there's a whole other civilization down there you know that's why we like really bond with mammals only because fish don't do a goddamn thing for their kids yeah those dirty because they don't really have them like it's a trick it's like nature's tricked them did not being attached by the kids they blast some eggs down at the bottom of the floor and

28:05then the male's come along and jizz on the eggs shark I'm done here get out of there and they jet that's it and they leave like millions of kids yeah the only ones that take care of them and there's a few female fish that keep the babies in their mouths you ever seen those yeah and then they let them go like when the babies are in trouble they hold them in their mouth and they already gone good and they open up and the babies get to swim around uh-huh yeah that's it my mouth your what you there's a bumper sticker for you but things that live in the ocean that we do love like dolphins take care of their young yep killer whales take care of their young yeah right it's really weird you don't take care of your young you can yourself it's kind of a mammalian trait yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but like you're saying you can't we always try to create like on other

28:52planets is how is it yeah you found that right away that is amazing one is on the other side mom Jesus yeah last door yeah that's crazy what kind of fish is that doesn't say wow that's amazing it's like it's smoking fish right yeah like it's a hookah yeah it looks like a grouper something looks like something in the bass fan yeah it's gorgeous fish she mentioned the thing with feet and I'd watch them blue planet to the other day and there is it's not a fish apparently it's called like a toad of some kind but it's it hangs out on the bottom and it has feet it looks like a fish that grew feet it walks around yeah that's not a fish I don't believe so it's actually some sort of Toad I think technically whoa but yeah and they look like human feet almost didn't look like has toes and every that's amazing one of the weirdest things that I ever saw about the ocean

29:43was there was a theory that was going around a few years ago that I I don't know if this is legit or not Google that they think that it's entirely possible that octopus octopi may have come from eggs that were frozen and landed here from an asteroid there was speculation that there was something about the way really yeah the way that they pried you know the DNA and RNA of octopus are so different than every other animal in the fossil record that it's almost that there was a consideration that they might have actually been in alien species because you know the term you know what panspermia means panspermia is a theory that is pretty widely accepted in a scientific community that some life is transferred through asteroid collisions so like that say if a of rock slams into our planet and knocks a chunk of rock loose and that chunk has DNA on it and amino acids and all the building

30:43blocks for life sure that bacteria whatever it is things that some things you know little things can survive in space like tardigrades little life-forms can survive in space right that they slam into a planet eventually and then when they do that that life is transferred onto that new planet science news holy cabooses came to earth from space as frozen eggs millions of years ago okay but this is like the the express I read it a little bit yeah but that's that's the most feasible version of aliens coming here yes we tend to think of it as it lands and like a space man who looks like George Clooney steps out but he eyes like an antenna or something is like hi I'm here to share with our our planet Altoona or whatever and speaks English and all this like it's it's on a on a biological level that we almost can't comprehend go back please it says the extraordinary claims made in

31:35a report entitled the case of Cambrian explosion terrestrial or cosmic which co-opted by a group of 33 scientists and published in the progress in biophysics and molecular biology journal in the paper suggest that the explanation for the sudden flourishing of life during the Cambrian era often referred to as the Cambrian explosion lies in the stars as a result of earth being bombarded by clouds of organic molecules wow I think that's also the theory of how water got on earth they came from think it came from comets because when you see comet's comets are all water and I think like millions of years of us getting hammered by comets huh like you know when you see the trails of comets that's literally ice and debris coming off of that comet I didn't know that yeah literally the more you know the more you know comment yeah but they think that about mushrooms as well

32:28they think that spores can survive in a vacuum so if something like say if some spores were attached to a rover yeah and we shot it off to move to the moon or something like that and it got there somehow or another if there was the right conditions for that thing to grow that they could actually survive the trip and then grow on the moon or on Mars or anywhere whether it be water and sunlight and atmosphere like invasion of the Body Snatchers yeah well spores or even weirder right because spores create mushrooms and mushrooms actually breathe oxygen and breathe out carbon dioxide mm-hmm they say they're closer to an animal than they are to vegetables yeah that's uh that's I've thought about that when I when I've eaten magic mushrooms yeah a lot it's like I basically just ate an animal well you also feel like it's taking like it's alive inside of you communicating with you mm-hmm

33:20yeah right don't you feel like that like it's not as simple as I'm getting hi no I smoke weed I feel like I'm getting high yes when I eat mushrooms I feel like I'm entering into the thought process of an alien creature oh yeah yeah you you put on like a spacesuit on the inside in a way and you're you're evolving a certain way if only for like seven or eight hours or something yeah give her microdose know I have friends that do run White's big into that oh is he everyday Ron White kills me man I caught you just you just picked the most random name you could have but I'm just like that makes perfect sense he's beautiful yeah yeah he's he's a real comedian in that he's always a mess yes beautiful he's always hilarious yes relationships are always full chaos focus he's always drunk he's always a peach yeah he's always the nicest nicest he's never had any attitude with any comedian ever and

34:20always just he's he's like he's like America's wisecracking drunk uncle yeah but not racist no no he's beautiful yeah I love that guy me too me too I I it was almost like you know there are certain mystical gateways and signs you see that are like oh hey things gonna be okay where there's I saw the magic monkey in the tree I landed in Las Vegas with my wife and she loves Vegas and we went to the cab line and just standing there as Ron White smoking a cigar as if the city put him there like he's waiting for people which they should you know that they should just make a Ron white hologram as you drive into the city where he's there all the time uh-huh he's there all the time during the rodeo if you're in yeah you're in town for the rodeo Ron White's at the Mirage that's usually my wife's birthday's in early December and that's always in the rodeo is yeah

35:09well that clubs awesome do you work the Mirage here we go there I've opened for Tosh there yeah Terry phaidor Theatre yes that's a badass place it really is just like a perfect perfect sized theater for comedy yeah it's like a thousand seats not too big but it's all like right in front of you yep I used to work the place where they do the car theater where they do the Cirque de Soleil oh yeah but it's too cavernous yeah like you actually cost me money to work at the Mirage and I'd rather do that because then it's fun yeah another one was just too big as that people don't think about in terms of I think we only think about that comedians and promoters like the the architecture of a good comedy real you know like generally speaking comedy club lower ceiling yeah like the o.r mm-hmm the or at the Comedy Store yeah do you ever do Comedy Works in Denver yeah love flawless flawless flood

36:03they nailed it yeah oh yeah Comedy Store yes flawless Acme in Minneapolis yes Acme's got a few pillars that are a little annoying that's true that's true it's a huge building but the ceiling height is just right yeah wide ass pillars like what if I'm sitting right here I got to do this to watch the show lean left you worry about who's behind it yeah it's like doing comedy in the round I'm always like I feel like I have to keep spinning you know to keep I've only done that a couple times and it always feels weird I hate it yeah yeah I need people in front of me yeah it's awkward uh-huh yeah there's a good theater in Phoenix though the Hollywood Theater they do that in the round okay Louis did one of his specials there one of his HBO's all right yeah yeah I remember that one yeah yeah that was that's crazy because that's huge they turn around it's not

36:48that big really think it's 2,900 okay I don't even think it's that big it might not even be 2,900 maybe 2700 find out young Jaime maybe I'm wrong but I know Sebastian I think he did theater-in-the-round in Madison Square Garden god bless at 18,000 she's for shows boom so good he's one of those guys that like back when no one knew where he was who he was you know three years ago or so like I I would make a point to stick around and watch him at the store she's so fun he's a great guy too yes another guy like no one begrudges if you progressed grab it Sebastian his success you're probably a well you probably don't like fun yeah you know I mean I I have such a blast watching him cuz it's just it's like he's like a silly ballet dancer yeah like making up all these all these stories is his facial expressions and and and how he is his physical comedy is just par excellence I love it yeah and

37:50he's always annoyed everything is annoying to him just pisses him off yeah if he ever achieved peace uh-huh like peace of mind be terrible awful frizz what would you do yeah you know I used to legit when I was starting to do comedy like I wanted to meditate and to try to do these different things but I thought that's gotta be bad for your act I should probably know that's crazy yeah I know like guys saying like oh don't don't be healthy right bad for your act yeah you want to feel like yeah the only time you feel good is when you're drunk right that's it my depressed would be angry and lonely she's smoked cigarettes desperately need their attention on stage yeah it's the only place you live we're all anyway who cares well some of my favorite acts were like really different League Richard Jennings one of my all-time favorite acts was super depressed when I'm killing himself yep

38:43you know I'm just like god damn it it was it was maddening when I when I heard the news because he's one of those he was one of those go twos that I could just you know I I get fed up with comedians than aren't fans anymore right a guy in Chicago who ever of those people you you start out around and you're like you just look at them and you never say it you're like I never want to be you man never and he would be the back and just go would go ha funny like is it because you didn't laugh you made a noise like laughter but you see everything is a competition I love I love watching good comics whoever they are and my god Richard Jeni was one those guys are just like this guy's an ace you're like Brian Regan or it's like I'm never not gonna laugh yeah he's such a sweetheart too now we've talked about this in the podcast that I think what that came from was there was a famine

39:30mentality that existed in like the 80s and the 90s because the only way you could become successful is if you got on The Tonight Show and there was only one slot at night and there's only five nights a week and then if they don't always have comics on either and then the only other way you would get successful is if you got a sitcom right or you got an HBO special which only famous people got right yeah that was that that was the highest yeah at you ought to be Seinfeld or Kennison or someone big to get HBO special so for a regular Schmo like you were I back then it was like what do you do how do you make it so everybody was dog-eat-dog yeah it was all and I think somewhere along the like the early to mid 2000s that shifted yeah and it shifted because of the internet that's true isn't it yes it is Internet I kind of thought of it as an organic thing from you know because the comedy

40:22happen because disco died and you could basically fill a huge room with just a spotlight in a mic and one dude you know and these guys still that space and they were just raking in hand-over-fist because people just they didn't want to disco dance anymore and it did it just died a horrible death it was too much everyone cocaine and everyone did disco like Kenny Rogers did a disco song was just like everybody kissed in the disco so yeah I know and so I thought it was because that kind of faded out we kind of just came to our senses as audience members and comedians but you're right it is the Internet yeah that's what changed it well the internet came along and comics started promoting themselves and someone who really deserves a lot of credit is Dane Cook for sure Dane Cook was the first guy to really become famous through the internet yeah and then everyone including me started

41:11paying attention going oh oh like this is another way like even though there is the regular way of television shows and movies and all that stuff there's this way too and this way just made at the time he was the biggest selling comedian of all time yeah he spent like 20 grand on a website which to me at the time I was like who has that kind of money that's and why ya buy a car but now he was the smart one and he also spent all day responding yes people on long everybody and then you know built up this reputation for doing that and then promoted the out of himself through MySpace and all these different ways that he promoted you know the shows and Stan and then became gigantic yeah and then everyone else around 2000 3 or 4 that's when we all started to jump in right and comics had myspace accounts and comics had Facebook pages and and I you know I had a website

42:02in the 90s I had a website way back in the night but I basically just wrote blogs on it yeah I had a message board and around the message board but what he did was use it as a business vehicle right like an a way to actively promote himself mm-hmm so then somewhere in the mid 2000s comics started doing internet things like little Internet shows like crackle was a thing and they were doing little online things and then people were working with each other more yeah so instead of comics being like competition they were there was camaraderie sure we were doing each other's stuff and then podcasting took it over the top yes once that happened everybody realized oh you can really help each other yeah and you don't have to use I feel like in between there one thing you one thing you left out was the amount of the rise of what you call the Internet comedian which where they just

42:48kind of would make blogs and they had people that would edit them so they would be funny yeah you and I have come up over you know 20 odd years doing stand-up where you learn timing you learn how to read an audience the ebb and the flow your brain waves and how to pick when to say something and how you know cuz timing is everything yeah with with an internet video you can have an editor just go nope here here here here he said that faster and it's it's this thing that kind of vaunted these kids into you know YouTube millionaires if they were lucky but sometimes they go on the road and people were like some thoughts going on every single time they'd eat plates of like you can't just do that's like learning karate in your basement practicing in the mirror yeah and then going to fight in a tournament it's like those guys I saw that that thing you put up online of those those

43:37those tutorials horrible tutorial Oh fake martial art dome at me guy entering the square circle where they put someone who knows what he's doing are they still doing that style of video where they edit constantly and make those YouTube videos where it's constant edit edit edit where they cut out all the pauses that's still a thing there's all sorts of styles on YouTube so yeah I could find you honey because of that yeah that was like the primary way these people were doing these blogs everybody had it was like everything was edited yeah and it would cut too it's almost like watching watching Family Guy where you know Peter would be like that's that time I was into disco and it cuts to him it's like jacking off on a disco do that yeah we have to say it on stage we have to have a segue bah blah blah we can't just hit a click and it you cut to me beating off and then back to me in the

44:31audience yeah I've watched a couple people recently tried to transfer that doing stuff in front of a microphone in front of a video camera to going on stage for the first time I've watched that ha it's terrifying it's terrifying and and it kind of breaks the Covenant of an audience because any I'm like I have an opener who's like they're like I'm I'm actually nervous and blah blah blah you know do you still get nervous I'm like yeah of course of course I'd be a sociopath if I didn't get nervous almost every time but you know you just you fight through it and it's fine but I always tell him look man the audience is rooting for you yeah like they want you to do good yeah you know that's the thing that people forget they think you're they think every time you're in the road it's it's an away game unless you're a hot girl there's a hot girl yes hot girl with like showing

45:23some cleavage with a skirt good luck yeah because guys just don't take them seriously - I'm funny than you hold on yeah you that's it yeah it's like perfect male privilege like that's not what I want from you yeah I want sex well there's that's a weird look to like a girl with uh like long legs and a miniskirt and high heels on stage telling jokes it is strange that doesn't work well you're you're overly attractive comedian male or female has always been a little weird yes there are there are people that I eat are undeniable and I'm like alright cool you know but it's like part of me kind of a little too handsome there fella well - there was a guy who when Kyle and I moved to LA we were roommates there's a guy that had a show and he was a comedian and and a physical trainer and he sent emailed both of us like we were like hey can we get booked on your show and he emailed both of us

46:15just he must taken every email in his in his in his book and just sent it out a blast of he is if you need if you need to get fit and the picture was a picture of him shirtless under a waterfall like I was like this guy as I this guy Kyle all-caps goes take me off your list and just sends it that's always in touch with nature sometimes I go backpacking by myself my high my favorite or probably one of my top five onion headlines was the the trucker guy is like why are those homosexuals keep sucking my article one of them the second paragraph was I'm just hanging out with under a waterfall we're enjoying the day all of a sudden he's sucking my that every time yeah men under waterfalls with their head back like especially if they have long hair yeah and they tighten up yeah it's like did you take it did you take it I'm still I'm flexing my core as hard as I

47:27can let me know when you're done it's super spirit o gut comes out of basically plant-based super spiritual out here there was that guys taking in the mountain that's like a kid that's like a kid in Thailand that's like a elephant come on you wanna you're like the muscular white dude see that's more like it o handsome man feeling good look at a girl but it doesn't bother me at all when a girl's doing it get that girl back so strange live your best life doesn't bother me at all I see a girl under waterfall with her hair back like that not even a tinge of disgust I don't see I don't even mind the guy under the what like that guys just having fun that guy's not like she's not going wait what are you doing look at me right come back he's not picking mr. spiritual man like the one below it with his arms down Yeah right below there Jamie on the bottom bottom row yeah that guy looks he's

48:22having a good time that's a party super high why the world needs happy men that's the what kind of article is that I mean who wrote that some depressed dude right about to shoot himself he's got a gun sitting on on the desk right next to the laptops like why the world needs happy man I'm trying to think it would right looks like yeah well dad dude yeah fat that's Oh Burt wishes he was that is a dangerous amount of belly burn losses all this weight every year yeah we do this weight loss thing follow along you're crazy see what the hot yoga and he gains it all back every year yeah every year it's soul cycle with his wife yeah and he just I mean that's unbelievable he keeps telling me cuz he sent he sent out a mass text test the other day that we have there's a group on my phone called the sober October group it's it is one of the best text message threads ever it's ruthless yeah it's

49:21Segura re me and her and in look at him something's burnin with Bert Kreischer that burn is not calories this was not burning no but he sent out this message of the day like I missed the heart rate monitors watched Saving Private Ryan so sighs am i doing I love Birdman he goes out he'll do a comedy club and then go out and tell everyone where he's gonna drink and then he meets them at the bar takes his shirt off in Ottawa it's like 150 degrees below zero yeah he drinks with them all he gets his tour bus hi I mean I don't I don't go to the second location you know I'll hang out at the club a little bit take pictures of stuff you're the people and they have a beer but like I mean people like hey you should go to our bar nope yeah I've done it in the past I used to in the past but after a while becomes untenable yeah well you can't you're playing like 5,000 10,000

50:30Cedars now so yeah that's a lot of pictures you can't you're I watch I've watched jo koy hanging out with them where I'm like they're gonna kill him like they're gonna they're gonna tear his clothes off like Elvis used to almost get shredded by female nails yeah you know like there's so many people trying to get a selfie with him and he just played a stadium and he's just outside Wow just like dude just Joe just careful security yeah he's got he's got some people with him for sure but tasers whips I'm sure different different yes there's like a lady taser it's not as strong and there's like dude taser the various kinds of fans yeah you gotta be careful mm-hmm yeah it's but god bless him I mean that's kind of how he got that big the thing about Bert's fans those that Bert's fans are all drunk too right so they're probably not even gonna know what to do or you don't remember

51:20and yes if they were gonna kidnap them they'd give it up when they meet them yeah the next day they check their phone like that selfies all blurry and like yeah well your hand was shaking from the dts while you try to take it come back to town real quick give yourself yourself faint come on bud try something a Facebook my wife's not talking to me bird and your jokes the only thing keeping me going and the heart's not too strong these days and the doc doesn't say I have long so plus I'm coming around writing this article for Vox about why the world needs a happy man three bullets in the chamber nah not Verne's not Verne's roulette mines with three bullets I was thinking that the other day about marriage that marriage is essentially Russian roulette with three bullets because one's gonna die first 50% of marriages end in divorce oh and then there's the Chris Rock line

52:14that's just he goes that's just two people that had the courage to get out yeah I was like how many cowards just stay and suffer yeah yeah so true true Catholics so true yeah and this is coming from a guy who's happily married but that's when I said when I see people about to get married I go wolf good luck yeah well you're married yeah I said this is coming from a guy who's happily married yeah yeah it works I'm a Chris Rock no he's divorced he's divorced no I mean but me I see people get married I'm like oh yeah I always tell people like yeah I'm married I'm happy I love it don't do it yeah don't do is to rock dude that's why I got to have you an advice from a because Amanda will call through and she'll get like marriage advice we have a lot every single month that people call in and say hey man should I shouldn't I yeah you can't give people advice because first

53:02of all there is no way I know how you actually are together when you're alone I don't so it's advice from a so basically I just tinkled by myself and go just make sure you're doing this this this this and then you're on your own you know you know do not quote me yourself dr. Laura on your show my god be amazing I don't care she's so mean yeah she's brutish gives the meanest advice yeah yeah well I mean if I need to have more of those tough love people on the show I always had these comics that you know who it Santino was the meanest once because because a guy they love that big big leprechaun he I had someone come one called in and was like you know we usually curb these but like we get a lot of like how do I make it or when's the right time to move to LA or New York never or whatever but yeah but it's like it's like I don't know man it's it's kind of up to you and this guy is like

53:57I've been doing it like 12 years or something and Andrew was just like finished she goes I would give up man I would honestly give up because this business will eat you alive and I don't and that is something I don't have the heart I'm a sensitive guy I know the heart to say that to anyone to just say back it up and get move on you're eating for you you know but Andrew was saying that and it was kind of like yeah I appreciate his honesty you know well like I I just think that it requires an obsession yes like if you're not like fully obsessed you're probably not gonna put the thought process and the effort and do and you're not gonna survive the bombings no the bombings like they attest your soul it's just nothing worse than feeling that amount of hate IRA being in New York and dead silence and hearing a guy in the back beat be like are you kidding me can we

54:49go home now and the Jesus Christ like silence oh my god and I hear that guy in my dreams was bombing on stage once and this guy goes you're terrible and I was like he's right saying I didn't even respond like nothing I can say dude yeah of you I can't even pull myself out of this yeah nothing dad died I were a Patton Oswalt being on stage at the the first best library it was a Chicago comedy fest one I found I found the booklet from it recently like cleaning out my house what year and 2001 and it was Doug Stanhope schwartzen-muth we're a bunch of random like awesome people but patents on stage and in Marin back when Mayor and still drank I think that was the last time you drank that weekend Marin wasn't drinking back then Marin wasn't drinking way back in the 80s no he start drinking again yes oh that was like in the relapse period uh-oh I remember

55:57because he talks about leaving the hotel and a friend who was at the hotel was like yeah man when you left your luggage was sweating like said it to me so you're so hung over but Patton was like you know doing what him and Maren were just dropping in in places and this chick was so mad she got bombed she's like you suck any any facts like I agree with you I agree with she was mad at him because she got bombed ha ha and and so she was saying he sucked yeah she's just screaming I'm from the audience and like she said you gettin ya wool I mean I was kind of like this is a free-form room yeah I got bumped but I get to what Madden so she's a comic cackling yeah oh I know she never made it did she no ha ha yeah I mean it and and but it was that thing they was like if you say I could be killing it been one guy would be like this guy blows and I'm like I believe that guy

56:46damn it I don't want oh that's the worst is when you're killing you see one person the front row like just yeah like an old lady scowling like what yeah I had an old lady like that at the store the other day older lady like she was like halfway into my act she still had this look on her face like I don't know I hit her with this one bit in this one bed she throws her head back and then she's howling I'm like I got her when she was like all of a sudden like best feeling gave in maybe was the booze maybe the booze kicked in yeah how many without booze boy that would be a struggle that would suck I mean our whole job is entertaining drinkers I wonder what it would be like if we had liquor free comedy nights have you played you have to have played like those weed rooms yes yes too crazy they're insane we did the Toronto one the underground room yep there was no air for the candles on the

57:42table the candles were running on a promissory note yeah cause no oxygen in the room it was all just weed smoke I I was on stage midway through jokes and having second thoughts like every linear thought was a tree branch that was growing we're like which one do I follow well not only that what did I already talked about yes yeah what am i what am i covered all right I have no idea do you guys know well what I was doing it was doing it with Tripoli and Tripoli was sober at the time okay but we walk in this room and the secondhand smoke is a real thing that's what I mean I hadn't hit a joy oh you have in a wait till after my set I don't like doing comedy hi and I felt I felt hi on stage and it's that thing where it's like well you just got to run with it you can't you can't fight the tide don't swim upstream you're not getting any better no you just gotta keep going I did

58:30there's a show that guy Andy Haines had called Midnight Run where you'd smoke right before he got a stage and you just hit this big joint and I was doing great and then I had this huge setup and then my brain just the bottom fell out everything fell out all ideas all thoughts my name and I just went it was like and then the girl turns to me I gotta go and I walked in the middle of a set and then it was a crushed ending cuz people were laughing so hard cuz I just pulled the ripcord like I had a parachute that came out my backpack that pulled me out of the room sometimes marijuana is your friend yeah and sometimes it'll up your whole set but sometimes it'll go white why is that AHA man people go yeah why is that and then you're off on this tangent yeah I probably had never been on uh-huh and that tangent might be the best part of that set yeah I mean I think about

59:20people that were like from very regimented backgrounds and went into the military you know in the 60s and then hit their first joint and went this is dumb yeah I hate this where they cuz that to think about I found about marijuana is it introduced truths about myself that I found hard to face yeah and they were Manute my new truths there weren't anything big that I that I was afraid of or something you know that like I really want to kill someone or something stupid but it was just little things that would like bubble up yeah and I think that's that's that's the craziest thing about that plant to me well the idea that it makes you paranoid right that's it uh-huh it's the paranoia right oh I don't like pot it makes me paranoid I really think it makes you hyper aware you have all sorts of things you've been suppressing that's it cuz when I'm feeling good when I'm happy

60:07like I've been a good person I've been nice to people I've done the things I'm supposed to do I can get high and I enjoy the out of it but when I got loose ends uh-huh oh my god things that are with me you know maybe like something that went wrong in my life or whatever and then I smoke pot then it just gets weird yeah and I I tend to know I don't smoke anymore and get and think about myself and get worried about me I think about the world and I think about way too big of issues and I work I think about maybe we're all and you know everything and do you have children no once you have children then you start thinking about the future yeah like what is it gonna be like for my children's children or might their children like you like what what kind of toxic world are we gonna be living in yeah yeah this progress that we're exhibiting right now it keeps going in the same direction I

60:54think we're living at a level in a level of anxiety as a human race that probably four or five years ago I would've been like we can't handle that but we're somehow handling it yeah you know well we were adaptable yeah learned that but it's the the the amount of times I I'm so happy for comedy I'm so thankful that I'm a comedian and I'm around comedians that can kind of just just let the air out of me anytime what did you do before you did comedy I was uh when I was I was an actor as I was I was a kid then I went to school for acting and then I went to Chicago and I got an improv and stand-up and that was it where I was like I'll still do acting but like this is this is where my heart is you know what's so much more fun it's so much and it's so honest yeah and it's so in the moment I said this a lot on here and there but there's you know when you're on stage and you're going through

61:45a bit you've done 50 times and you just drop it and go you know what I had the worst diarrhea together today or whatever you know like something that you just share in and the crowd goes oh because a defense attorney wrote this book and one line and it was the truth just sounds different in court it just sounds different and it's the same thing for a comedian when a person just goes I don't think my wife loves me but it's like he really believes that and now the crowds like oh yeah good now this is the meet you know you took that you took the Cheetos off the table now you put the roast down now good now we have something to to chew on and that's that the immediacy of that can't really be matched improv maybe life theater sure but stand-up comedy is the is the moment like Buddhism likes to stay in the moment mmm in comedy if you're out if you stay out of the moment you're no

62:33longer in the pole position your car is gonna drive off off the off the road because the ultimate detector is a crowd yeah they know far more than they know they know you know I've been reading these articles written by these angry women about Louis CK's comeback and some of them have been going to his shows and writing about the show and one of them that I read today was from this woman in Pittsburgh what I thought was fascinating she said that he has he doesn't allow people to bring cellphones you know they have those Yonder pouches we put you and the the woman's her rationalization of this was and she included me and Dave Chappelle in this that we use those because we know that words offend but we don't want the consequences which is not what it is at all no it's you don't want people sharing your material online because you're developing it yeah and you're

63:27touring with it just like we in jokes are a surprise musician doesn't want you recording them just noodling around before they finish this song right but a musician song the difference is you can hear it over and over and over again yeah it doesn't lose any the thing you're the poet more more to the point but if you have a bit about diapers right and there's like a very specific punchline about a diaper and then they already know it they know that punchline and you're working out how to get to that punchline and how to set up the bit but someone leaked the audio already yeah I like that like Louise touring right now with that leaked set yeah which is weird right like with all that stuff about the Parkland kids and I don't know if he's still doing those bits but he was doing some of those bits yeah I guess a bit about losing all the money and about how

64:14he bought a gold watch like those bits like this woman referenced those bits in the article which means that she went to the show and he's doing the material from the leaf which it has to do yeah because he's only in if he brought an hour over the last ten months right he's been hiatus mm-hmm what what does he do like what he can't he's touring he was he's gonna tour with a whole new hour get the out of here yeah I mean I feel like I feel like he's he's quite obviously a special case because of his behavior yeah you know yeah but it's it's almost like I will say that aside you know like I I have my problems with Lillian and what he's done and everything but overall I'm on the side of free speech and in terms of being comedians we can't allow you to come in and film our or to record him no matter who it is because it's it's the larger thing is like everyone one thing with comedies

65:09everyone everyone everyone thinks they're an expert there's no other art form or someone's like I know what the best is or I got a friend funnier than you right in all fairness if I go to see a movie I'm not a movie maker but if I go to see a movie I think it sucks I should be able to say oh that movie blew true but you're not allowed to go on set and film it yourself while they're filming right well you're also not allowed to bootleg it and then put it online you're go to jail yeah yeah and it really will yeah and people that record our stuff like Stanhope was was tweeting about that yeah like how is this legal right afternoon Louis yeah and and you know Chapelle has that thing that like the Comedy Works has where you come in with your cell phone they put it in lock pouch yeah you get the combo you get it when you leave I was doing that before I did my Netflix special I was

65:54only doing it to really because I was tightening up my my set and I didn't want any of it getting leaked right before the Netflix special but once I filmed it then I stopped doing it sure because I was like it's too hard yeah to complicated and it's just like the Internet is gonna be the internet mm-hmm it's just you it did make the show better though you know where it did make it better Miami Oh real lives in Miami people are there such chimps that they just kept getting up and walking out yeah and did you check their phone yeah I'd get up they'd go out to get their phone they come back and so they were all just like popping up and down uh-huh everybody's just trying to and do coke in Miami Miami will always be more insane than any given at American city it's just on another level on America it's forever young forever it's for 21 yeah it really is like that like the

66:44name of that it's a coastal city it is a cocaine city meetings created by cocaine there's more banks per capita in Miami I know and anywhere else because of cocaine laundering yeah and and you go there and they're like are you gonna you're gonna go out tonight and you're like I'm out they're like no I mean it's 1:00 a.m. yeah we're not going out till 5:00 yeah five six years old you're like I can't do that you guys are crazy I have a wife they're all high yeah exactly up on coke and pills yeah running around rapping you mentioned Chappelle and we were talking about Bourdain before and I will not say what the joke is but that guy is such an alchemist like he can just make gold out of lead hmm in terms of in terms of material he had a Bourdain joke that made me double over laughing ooh about the suicide there wasn't talking about Bourdain per se but about his own

67:36family member like I don't want to blow the joke but it was it was that thing where apologies two people were listening to this I know you want me to say what it is but hey you know he's probably doing a special so I don't do that but it was it's testament to how with comedy there's always there's always a Mission Impossible there's always a topic like you cannot make fun of this right and someone found a way and it wasn't disrespectful and I was just like god damn it yeah he'll just to say these setups that you're like who where you going this one Jesus Christ yeah the idea that you can't make fun of something is crazy you just you might do it wrong but someone can do it right yeah yeah I mean it might might not be your style but someone can do it uh-huh yeah everybody's got a there's so many weird styles of them one of the beautiful things about comedy is the fact that

68:25styles are so personal yes you know like Dave Attell might be able to do a bit that you know Sebastian could not do it's just not in his wheelhouse Dave Attell is probably the funniest man on earth he's one of them I sure do just just kills me yeah like every time Jesus he's another magician he just pulls out of the air and he's so prolific yeah just always writing always always don't tuning things yeah yep and go hey I heard something like this before cuz like it just come to you else wants to make sure yeah yeah yeah yeah the comedy is so beautiful in that it really is an art form that you can't learn anywhere like you have to learn it yourself yeah it's not like you can learn how to play the clarinet you go and take classes and practice music I've ever created anything and you could play beautiful clarinet music yeah I mean you have to ever have invented a single song

69:16and you could just go out there and make a living yeah in the clarinet well and you don't learn to play a clarinet in front of an audience right you don't bring it to the clarinet open mic and you you have to learn in front of people uh-huh yeah you you're not gonna get up there and play flight of the bumblebee right away is there anything else we have to learn in front of people like that I mean even basketball you practice in the gym yeah there might be a couple friends hanging out yeah it's yeah it is the only only art form I can think of that you get you can only get better in front of a crowd it's crazy it's really crazy and there's no classes all classes that you take are useless really they're all taught by fools yeah they're all sorry folks teaching comedy class yeah I've had friends who have been John Roy write stuff online that I think is really

70:03illuminating that teaches you what the business is really like and and what the best comedy is from a comedians perspective but he's not he just puts him up there for free yeah he's not sitting in a room someone give you a coat like a good comic can coach you yeah they'd say hey man you know that bit if you just came at it this way maybe that would be your way like Neal Brennan yeah and I did that for um for a show where a guy who was he was more of like he's entertaining but his his his delivery and stuff was kinda like a TED talk and he was doing like uh he's gonna do a show you had a pilot where was just him kind of talking about the news and stuff and basically I brought me in to kind of just loosen him up to make it you know like the best comedians it gets like the funniest person at a party or how yours natural in front of your friends after a couple beers as you are

70:53onstage right you know so I just had to and it was just it was like like untighten Ilan this guy what I'm just like nope nope you're you're leaning into the funny you're trying that you're getting loud you think that's fun no no just right you know say it was fun that was fun just coaching someone it's hard for people to see how other people are seeing them yeah sometimes that's one of the reasons why people like to avoid recordings or films I don't want to watch themselves Oh cuz you watch yourself and you're like yeah it's the worst you watch an edit of you're special you already know the joke so they're not funny to you they don't get you hi I have a special coming out February 5th finally live in Portland and what's it coming out on it's coming it's gonna be like Gaffigan 'he's like everywhere so amazon prime itunes yeah and i'm seems to be the trend yeah a lot of people

71:44were doing that i was just tired of waiting where I had I had Netflix and Comedy Central they both I have good relationships with them but they're like our rosters full for this year we'll try for next year and I'm like man it's it's the first part of the year now yeah I'm just gonna do it and and and Hinchcliffe is gonna do the same thing smart yeah yeah yeah it's in Cowan to Callan just did the same thing that's like you get to a point we like look I gotta go I get it that you guys have yeah five Hannah Gatsby specials on the best burner ready to rock and roll I don't about to wake people up but I gotta make my thing yeah and but to the point besides my obvious sneaking in a plug there I like watching the cut of it with a with an editor I'm death death death people are like what's your favorite joke on it none of them pay to mind all those jokes but that's cuz you're good

72:30anybody who's suck they love everything they do I'm gonna on Bobby Lee real quick even though we love you I love him but and it's not even when we're on MADtv together Eric price and I were both on there we got hired the last season and then they cancelled it make of that what you will but uh when we worked with Bobby when he didn't have his dick and balls out eating a salad he would watch playback and we just watch himself and be like to the point where keegan-michael key me and Eric would just point point at him and go like to me me Cicely he would literally laugh at his own and I admired that about him I'm just like I could never it's a mental delusion he's got something wrong with his brain he he needs to put on a special I've been telling him forever more dude you are one of the best stand-up comedians alive and you don't have a special and he he still goes to clubs is

73:28like can I just do 20 minutes no nerds like no what we're paying you you doing yeah he asked if he could do 20 minutes he'll do him over an hour but he's always he's just so down on himself he's like I don't think I I just do like 20 can you let this guy do 45 it really says that when he goes to a club and laughs were there to see last I checked yeah cuz he's just so down on himself right he'll get up and just crush he's so funny I talked to him about it I was like why aren't you doing sir I'm going to I'm going to I'm like you're not going to know you've been telling me you're going to for years I've known Bobby Lee for 20-plus years yeah he's never put out a comedy special that's insane yeah Bobby Lee almost got me killed at a strip club in San Diego first time I already believe it'd be continued we were in our 20s and and I met Bobby Lee down there at the La Jolla comedy store

74:18and then we went out after the show this is probably 90 late 90 somewhere okay and we went out afterwards went out to the strip club and there was a smack skin' gentleman with a tattoo on his face in the 90s which is rare and he had long straight black hair Wow and he had a look in his eyes like he's killed people yeah I'm a good i'ma I'm a good at sniffing out danger I'm like that's real danger and Bobby was hitting on his girl he's trying to get a lap dance from his girlfriend God did I mean in Bobby's defense it's at a strip club but this girl was apparently his girlfriend out of strip club and Bob and the guy stood up you know and he stood up and he said something to Bobby and Bobby comes over he's like that guy I looked at the guy looked at Bobby I'm getting out of here right now and he's like either I go you come with me or you're gonna walk home I'm like

75:06you yeah I'm not getting killed for you you know we all ran out into the car and I had a Toyota Supra at the time and I got in my car and Bobby's like that guy ain't gonna do Mike get in the car I'm like dude you don't understand danger you're gonna get everyone killed it's guys like you yeah but Bobby Lee's one of those guys that has no spidey sense none none zero that you know I have very strong where it's tingling where I'm like oh I'm about to get jumped yeah I need to just abandon my pride and run down the school was a real one I was like oh this guy's like a gangbanger like this guy he had tattoo tears he was legitimately scary looking yeah even if he was bluffing I'm what is this is a video like what would happen this big guy right here he just he gets pissed off and he basically knocks everyone out here in the bar and like not nobody can do anything about

75:53Oh God he's one guy one guy's okay he'll stop this guy ox that guy out starts beating up a guy over here he's just beating people up for no reason yeah someone must have pissed him off he was dancing at the beginning of the video oh he's not doing anything this guy I don't even fight he's telegraphing every punch I'm not even a fighter nobody's letting him punch him well they're all drunk as oh they're bumping into him oh man he's nuts or in the morning or something that's what could happen in that situation yeah you have to send this to me cuz that looks like my friend Vince Averell he's a comedian from the Midwest kind of balding same size he's like punching little kids yeah look a giant punching little kids yeah one of my favorite videos of a bar is a girl and a guy the guy got in this girl's face and she grabs his his collar and headbutt some unconscious she grabs and

76:45goes wham drops it's hilarious like that must have grown up in a hard family yeah this super cuz this guy's way bigger than her and it was a dangerous thing to try and she just grabs his collar and slams her forehead right into his nose I think you can you can get away with that if you're a lady you don't I mean because I can't cuz it's not that it's excused but I'm gonna do it but like you're giving bad advice I'm not saying do it is it I'm saying this is it yeah watch this the guy like put it gonna get closer to us look at this BAM boom Kayode go to sleep holy look at her just strolling away that girl's done that before and that guy's like Sheila you killed again yeah whatever get you help whatever who's gonna arrest me don't you don't he's moving he's like we we didn't give you bionic limbs to let you do this yeah she's gonna play tricks put your hands

77:45on your chest that guy had to be like what are you gonna really coming touch you yeah never let people touch you know even if it's a girl girl grabbing like that be very careful that's a red flag yeah if someone does that you you feel tension yes feel like they're about to do something yeah yeah if you're a dumb dude and you think you're invulnerable yeah and then wake up with a shattered nose get headbutt into oblivion the real scary things falling out did the thing about getting hit is that fall in your head bounces aha that's the most dangerous thing yeah I mean I'm so tall I would probably I would have permanent brain damage right all the falling yeah because the sack of jelly maybe that's why Bobby so cocky cuz he's not falling very far that's it he's woken up on the ground balls like tucks and rolls he's like I was talking that guy and I must have bumped my head on

78:36something because I woke up in an alleyway but I'm fine I'm fine yeah yeah have you ever done his podcast no I got a reach out he's a good dude I love I love hanging out I hope he really does do a commie special this year I really do cuz he's so funny I mean he matures he's a no brainer for Netflix no brainer right you know diversity yeah and he's a nut he has great stories yeah yeah yeah he told me story once about uh he's who's at MADtv they had a table read and he hadn't slept in a couple of days he just gotten back from Mexico he had a giant bowie knife like tucked into his shirt and he was up on pills and he was just sweating heap it up for days and he's at the table Regis and that was before he decided to clean his act up yes I was lucky enough to come across like well after those days and we they wrote they wrote a script to with him they gave him the wrong script with

79:35like extra lines with a monologue that took up like the whole page so that he would have to remember it no no he said to read it and everyone's out like like teeth they tell everybody like don't worry about that part where he thinks he's a bird and so Bobby's like I'm a bird I'm supposed to and like the writer was coaching him just like do the wackiest good bird boy and he's like car car supposed to fly car and I'm a bird and he looks up and we're crying laughing and he sees someone screaming you got any through the script across the room and I remember yeah just to they just did I like on his birthday or something to master I was like the best prank wasn't mad TV like the longest-running sketch show ever outside of siren I was yeah that's crazy uh-huh nobody watched it it ten people watched itto it cost too much I thought it was yeah because they do a lot of like

80:18song parodies and things like that and and it it's just I mean I wish it would have kept going it was one of course you were working oh yeah it was one of those things where it was like you'd hear it was still on you're like whoa that show still on oh yeah cuz I was on it with Bryan Callen in 1994 yeah Bryan Callen and Artie Lange like 94 95 95 that's crazy it's a long time ago yeah and then all those years later I'm like what it's still on dude when I got the call to audition still on television this was 2008 that is a shocking crazy yeah 2009 it ended 1995 to 2009 that's insane we shot the last they canceled it I want to say January of 2009 and it was they canceled it on my they told everyone my day on my day off also his original network he was on Fox and why does it say the CW - they tried to bring it back tried to bring it back yeah with like what Adam Rey was on it

81:20what and a couple people I don't know but what is the CW is that real oh look there I am set up like drug dealers money laundering operation the CW network what is that is it like those yeah I live south of Glendale and there's a there's a banquet hall every two blocks I'm like that's some laundering yeah come on that's got to be some geek some easy laundering right there at all they're just trying to figure out a way to get rid of money yeah you gotta move it around who's to say there isn't a wedding to weddings add a couple wedding well that you gotta think that if you're a person in this day and age that you selling drugs and you try to launder money you have to be super sophisticated about that's the hardest part if you're making millions of dollars selling drugs mm-hmm how do you you know you have to own like laundromats or something like you can't

82:10be like Pablo Escobar's moving the money from the bottom of the talks it'll rot like fruit like there's so many rats in there I was at a oh it was the best way to describe it so giving anybody up I was at a luxury automobile place ah and this one gentleman came in who is in the rap game sure and he they had a large bag of money they were looking at Lamborghinis I wasn't looking at Lamborghini when you do ship idle abrogate no but they seldom at this place and this guy had a band they were bringing out the money counter a money counting machine yeah so good Scarface my Scarface yeah like this is how they were gonna buy a car that's fantastic I guess if you're in the rap game that's how they like to buy cars sure they like to just like throw a duffel bag full of cash and buy a car and then you're done you're done it's like now I wait for the wire to come through here you go

83:04I my my I used to work with a business manager who used to work with high-end sports as high on the athletes and she's like oh yeah like I was like can you each set this up or some transfer she's like listen you'll never make my job as hard as trying to get a Lamborghini dealer to open at midnight in Las Vegas where the client wants to buy one oh right like somebody wins yeah I want to buy a Lambo right now coked out of their mind yeah get married I'm gonna buy a bull who was that pictures his future either rappers to him yeah million dollar future is future is very very popular there's future and looks like he's got some stray hundreds in that ring finger yes slipping through his fingers do you think yes like a hole cut in the in the money right really well as mansard down very low because he notice it made good good point okay might be made up a fleshlight and

84:00hailed into that stack of cash so he's got a million dollars in cash how much have that Mike Tyson back in the height of his is of his heavyweight reign he used to carry like something like $20,000 on him at all times or something insane that's normal isn't it yeah well it's for a rapper 20 grand is that's less funny but I'm talking to 80s but like I remember reading that an article as a kid being like Christ and I went through two thoughts isn't he afraid of getting wrapped of course not of course not Mike Tyson like he's gonna find you unless you kill him he's gonna he's gonna find he's gonna sit on you and punch your head until it's jelly okay that was after 50 cent filed for bankruptcy right because like women were coming after him for child support so he said he was bankrupt but he also made hundreds millions of dollars off of vitamin water yeah he made a killing with that vitamin

84:50water deal yeah he's got some weird bankruptcy thing was it was child support is that what got him in the end no I don't think it got him because he was avoiding it he never should have wrapped have a baby by me baby be a millionaire I'll write the check for the baby comes who the cares so he said that since I mean you're setting yourself up there I guess he cares yeah well the thing is after a while when you don't have a hit record out in like a decade right you're like hey this could dry up yeah like maybe I need to go bankrupt and stop paying these ladies it's a cash-only business he Frye has it all hidden I don't know what he did like but the Vitamin Water thing is in cash only I don't know how I don't know how that guy is $1 women say you're bankrupt I just think he really is I think I think your theories probably sound like yeah I think it was literally because of that

85:46like someone was trying to hit him up either for alimony or child support he was like I got an idea mm-hmm I'm gonna hire some financial wizards work them sorcery yeah dig a hole bear it in the ground it is weird that people give people money like like you break up and you go okay well now you got to give them money like I get it if you have a child to support totally make sense right but like if you dated someone for a couple of years and then you married them and then while you're married you made a million dollars they didn't make anything yeah okay I want half that money like what we're not together anymore uh-huh yeah yeah but I want money yeah I want money from you take sorry are you gonna do half my set on the road for now on no no but I want you to support my lifestyle oh I'm used to a certain lifestyle that's another thing that gets me that's used to a certain lifestyle

86:35the guy the guy who Joan Collins I don't know 16th husband or something I remember he that was his thing in court like your honor my client has grown accustomed to a certain lifestyle that was all over the news and I was just like custom like you can't change you cannot change right there's no way you could live a middle-class life anymore means that those days are done okay it's upward it's only upward well you probably can't you you can't fly anything less than first class now can you probably float yeah sometimes are you doing good for you yeah yeah it's just a plane yeah that's good yeah but I I know people that if they had to sit and like I remember when when uh during whatever recession or something there's some video of Puff Daddy getting on a plane and he was like he's like your boy isn't flying private we got to fix these problems man I got

87:25to fly in first class and he's like why would I give a your boy isn't flying private oh my god yeah it was amazing thank you thank you for tweeting about this I was worried about the government shutdown well in yelling it yelling and this was like ten years ago but like yelling it at the whoever's filming him on TMZ and and I think about the person that's in like Group D for that plane where they call you and it's just like you and like a stray dog that Li it's late on the plane was he saying he wasn't flying private because the money wasn't flowing because the economy was low yeah that was yeah yeah there's someone that's like ah I used my last check to get on this plane to see about a job offer in Tulsa oh Jesus he's one of those guys like he had some billboard on sunset it was like can't stop won't stop right he was like I already thought you stopped I

88:10didn't know you didn't stop I thought I told you that we don't stop can't stop won't stop it's like we don't know you told us we thought you stopped you haven't seen you in a while you didn't stop yeah well what's he been doing while he wasn't around he didn't stop was he it was 2008 cuz the gas prices were too high so he stopped flying private that's what it was thank you gas prices wasn't okay economy gotta fix these problems yeah for Puff Daddy or whatever like if I was playing stadiums or something like that in 2008 and I got on the plane and yelled at it like a TMZ thing and someone just creased my brow with a brick like just hit me in the face right earned completely earned I don't think you you know like that someone I don't think violence is the answer that's true I'm I'm speaking dramatically but yeah you know it's almost like that guy you ever been in line waiting to plane and

89:01someone just starts playing music and you're like come on man yeah those rolling speakers dude I'm like a DJ em this is the thing that guys do at the gym they bring their own small speaker and overpower the music that's playing over the know like what the is that that happened to Tony and I in Toronto we were like what the is this this guy's just playing a shitty music like really loud like techno Oh brutal yeah brings his own music and you got to listen to him cuz you're right next to the laptop machine you man well earbuds yeah just buy some earbuds weird man they're weird with their lack of appreciation for other people yeah well the people that like watch their iPads and are like a phone and they watch something with volume on and I've twice I'm not a very confrontational person but I'm just like hey can you put some earbuds in and they're like I don't have any I'm like

89:52can turn the sound off and they're like give me a look like I like I said something like you know take your pants off makes you feel more calm if you would take your pants off you know like I said something that insane but they like they just look at me like I got making people listen your stupid it's it's just it's it's distracting it's grating what's weird is you'll go to a restaurant and you'll see two kids sitting opposite of each other with iPads they basically bring a portable television and they're both watching a different thing yeah and it's like this sound yes conflicting sound of two child's program yeah going back and forth on the opposite side of the table and the loud I was at a restaurant the other day and there was two children and two parents and no one was talking to each other the dad was looking at his phone uh-huh the wife was looking at her phone two

90:42kids were looking at iPads and no one was communicating they just sitting there like everyone looks depressed they're all fat they don't have game rooms anymore though like when I was growing up we would go to a restaurant get a dollar game room for an hour until the food came yeah a dollar for what an hour when the quarterback then you could play four games in an hour I was I didn't lose he was amazing game Donkey Kong are you a pinball wizard now pin balls little too old for me you played a several ball yeah it's coming back for sure that's like leagues and all sorts that's like made a retro pinball is hard I know a dude who goes yeah he plays in pinball leagues that's that's so impressive yeah he's got pinball machines at his restaurant to be good at something like that it's just it's fruitless there's no it's impressive it's like someone who's really good at

91:40like like lawn darts yeah there was a guy there was a guy the king of I'm the king of long darts brother yeah like hey this is the world Strongest Man that's great and all but I'm the king of lawn dart rule I've given my life to lawn dart numbers to be these big-ass weaponized lawn dart oh you could kill someone with them lawn darts used to be like a small football just come straight yeah like hatchet throwing or like ax throwing places I've made like a little bit of a on that resurgence but I've sold it becoming popular now they're in all the major cities you know why because girls in their underwear on Instagram was throwing hatchets yeah like Aubrey and his girlfriend Whitman the throwing hatchets at targets what sand in their underwear man come and meet and need a new way to be violent during drinking you know like that's just throwing an axe or it's also very

92:32retro yeah yeah it's very Viking yeah just do axes always land the right way that's what always freaks me out I feel like it would my handle would bounce off the wall and it would just fly somewhere weird in a movie the guy grabs the knife by the blade like this and it always lands yep with the blade in the body imagine someone threw a knife at you and the handle hit like this you're like oh this knife slide in your ribcage heard you mention this yesterday but did someone duels that were a lot of duels I heard a stat I didn't I never knew about it that Andrew Jackson was in something like a hundred duels what he only killed one person I thought he was killed a lot of you usually get shot in the arm like you know like a musket ball would go like your legs or the one where he killed the guy he actually it was a I forget the actual guy's name but he was known as being a really good duel he

93:27killed a lots of P like 26 people something like that so he challenged this guy and he thought the only way to win would be to let him take the first shot so he let him take the first shot got hit in the chest was bleeding covered the hole and then shot the guy and he died whoa he shot him in the head he said he fell immediately and then died like a couple hours later I think I don't know if he was the president at the time but the the doctor said like I don't know how you stood and took that shot and he said I he shot me in the brain I was gonna stand and take that shot to kill this guy I don't know if you said like or whatever but like Andrew Jackson is crazy well like where his where is where the statue of him is and in Jackson Square in New Orleans there's that church that's behind it and that this is why New Orleans is supposedly the most haunted city is because they'd had the

94:15most duels because once Andrew Jackson contacted Jean Lafitte and was like I need an army and John Lafitte was basically a gangster which is basically someone that can get you anything like that's what a connected guy does and so he got him freed slaves Native Americans Creoles Cajuns and just you know angry men and they repelled the British but then they stayed and they just lived in the bars and they were duel happy because their egos were so big and I've looked for these and I can't find him what they had was dueling cards where if you had one it would say Joe Rogan have your face you know probably that image and they would say you know dueling card and someone bumped into you and you were like you just give him your car to be like see in the morning and that means we're shooting it out whoa you would do all over nothing and the guy I went in this ghost tour and the guy taught me

95:00they told me this story and he said imagine the amount of guys who were hungover woke up like what did I do I got a duel now and you'd go behind that cemetery that's where they'd have their duel and imagine laying there with a bullet or a piece of round lead and your liver and gone like I'm dead over this I stepped on my foot they keep cards like dude this is just like a picture of one they also said that a lot of times the the duel wouldn't actually happen like they might not actually shoot it was more of a test of will of like yeah will you honored they'd have to bring a second guy to make to like verify that the duel actually went down and got a I'm serious he's like the judge he's laying odds I think there's certain states where duels are legal I think there's still legal in Arizona or they used to be because there was a cop who shot someone in a duel like years back

95:57really yeah yeah it was it was a weird thing like a cop was off-duty and he shot someone in a duel oh man I want to say this is more than ten years ago so maybe they changed the law but I remember reading that going what you can do you do that's a Texas well yeah it's only what's that Washington State has mutual combat law because I know I watched a video of this dude who was a MMA fighter he's to dress up like a superhero and people up in he would like stop people from committing crimes and then fight them and then one video Carlos fedora I think his name was he was fighting someone in Seattle in front of cops like some guy agreed to fight him and then you see right away what a terrible idea it is any leg kicks the guy and the guys got this look in his face like oh my god you actually know how to fight it yeah he beats the out Phoenix Jones yeah that's what he's

96:59calling south Phoenix look how he dressed but watch this so the guy's like you'll kick your ass and this is in front of the cops like you he's like you know you think you're gonna it and he's wearing this superhero costume on and he's like give me some vibe right he's telling it back up the guy's walking toward see him wearing that outfit yes you think oh I can kick this guy's ass for sure this guy's a clown cosplay dork but watch that skip ahead he's like okay so the guy wouldn't stop badgering them and then finally in front of the cops they agreed to let these dudes Duke it out holy that's it right there let it go there watch this oh that's when you know you made me stay yep that first moving around and again you got a useless and he's turning to kick to know you jab him to the body you up Wow god this guy's like that third leg kicks a real problem the fourth leg kick yep

98:27that guy is basically hopping around on one leg now oh now now it's beating that's it that's a wrap that's right and cops are standing by watching this guy get brained yeah that's what's crazy is like it's very irresponsible for the cops because that's not a good fighting surface they set aside there's a there's a great line from a Bukowski novel where these guys are all gathering after like a night out or something and this guy's hungover and he's just like he's like I heard you got in a fight and he's just like oh man that guy had to be a pro beat me so bad I myself cuz it's that thing where it's like when you fight someone who's whatever what okay it's a fight but like can you fight a pro it's just done well it's like playing basketball if you don't know how to play basketball yes what a terrible thing yeah play some one-on-one then you don't even know how

99:24to dribble yeah I'm like that's like why did I agree to this is there a state where it's legal to duel there's no firearm do when what how long ago was it still legal late 1800s I believe hmm so maybe this guy did it he was a cop he he had a duel with a guy who was his wife whoa yeah yeah what's up he just killed the guy I don't know I don't remember the story entirely and he definitely killed somebody Jesus when I was he was a cop I remember the whole story being that it was very controversial but but it was legal maybe I'm remembering and all up hmm might have been more than ten years ago five places where it's okay to shoot some cruise ship how's that work like if you're on when I'm carnival cruises and some guy insults your name and throws jello at you two laws of the fish-like I know about the international waters but like a cruise ship would be out and that's nuts

100:32you know what I'm worried about cruise ships that I would be on the deck when some guy throws his wife office off the side of the boat right and you cuz like that does happen oh yeah a husband and wife went on the cruise the wife went missing I don't know what I went to bed early you know tricia kept partying we yeah we had an argument but we were deeply in love and and we had a couple of juno people saw screaming and I might have slapped her a couple times but uh boy I love her and her disappearing and what's up I learned from a buddy of mine who was on he was with the second city touring company or Turco and they were on a cruise ship and he was telling me that they found out that like all the food you don't eat they grind it all up and just shoot it out in the water so that attracts game fish and the game fish attract sharks so anytime there's a there's a cruise ship there's

101:19just sharks all the time really yeah so so if you went overboard yeah that's not there's not a lot of hope oh good Christ yeah did you see that video of that woman in Hawaii swimming around with the largest known great white shark no it's amazing it's a more than 20 foot long great white shark and it's not like guess well she's just swimming around women with it yeah in the water swimming with it yeah she's got a an Instagram page just filled with photos of her and this shark boffo wahoo it's so big it's so big it doesn't even look real and she's just swimming alongside this thing it's a female shark it's like 20 20 feet long at least so she just saw it and to swum up I think she's like an expert oh okay see if you can find that it's stuck in another article but the dual sorry to go back for us Oregon has a law that they were trying to get rid of two years ago I don't know

102:20I'm trying to find out where that guy got his gun where his dick is that's a sir there's but it's still that here Republicans and I posed to scrap 170 year old ban on duels for public officials I think detective highlight how many arcane logs I still upheld that's where I'm from I never knew it could have been dueling all this that's official well no they're they're trying to scrap the ban so they're trying to reinstate bans to let people know how stupid these old laws are they're still in the books they decided it would not be very civil of to members of the legislature sledge aschler disagreed and then shot each other on the front steps of the provisional chapter it's a bad look it's a bad yeah it gotta be cool though to see like Ted Cruz and Paul Ryan yeah standing on back-to-back yeah they have to use the muskets one shot I like in the upper right hand corner Magga hat boy refuses

103:18to apologize infuriating interview that kid looked drugged and coached like he was just probably both yeah they probably put him on some Prozac yeah get out there little fella apparently that Native American guy though they did an interview with him and it was a disaster cuz he said a bunch of things that just absolutely weren't true and they're questioning whether or not he actually was in Vietnam he definitely did serve in Vietnam but he wasn't in combat right but you know he had some some conflicting stories okay yeah people were prepared this kind of attention you know it's like III was offended as hell by those kids and I'm a big ol bleeding-heart lefty for sure and I hate those those hats but like I find they say at the same time every teenage boy is a idiot everyone you know and like it's but those boys were standing there doing their school chance

104:11while these there's a long video and the video is two hours long I haven't watched it yeah but I've watched segments of it and in the segments of it you see those Native American guys walk up to those boys and chants with with their drums so they're all there for different reasons yeah so the boys were there for the March for Life which is a pro-life March right they're from a Catholic school yeah and they're wearing their stupid red hats and then the Native American guy was there for a different reason yeah well there are a couple there was there was a it was a Native American celebration that's their yearly and you'd think they'd coordinate these things because there's all these different sort of marches going on and that's all that's our right as citizens but it's just that they're all the Lincoln Memorial together well not only that these boys did not have like a good

104:58chaperone like the boys were wild they yelled they said something like it's not rape if you enjoy it yeah one kid yelled and again by the way there's 40 kids one if you have one kid doesn't mean everybody should be beat up because one of your stupid classmates says something really dumb because he thinks he's funny and it was 15 i sat in an assembly once where a friend of mine was in like in Chicago and affirmed I was doing a play and they were doing like a scene from the play onstage and a woman would come onstage and they would these kids these boys I'm behind him and they're saying the worst I I can imagine yeah it's just like Jesus Christ yeah and it was if that it's that it's the race to the bottom boys who can say the worst thing I can write I can I can yell the n-word you know yeah it's staying where those are toots yeah I'm just trying to make and it's because

105:48what's the worst thing break and so this kid's gonna yell something about right it's its children yeah yeah I do feel they need better supervision but here's the thing they do for sure but you shouldn't be judged publicly on a global scale like this job fair yeah I mean I disagree with pretty much everything them and their parents stand for and stuff but it's their right to demonstrate you know what I mean so not I mean they look they're too young to know what the they're even demonstrating about sharp to really have a good argument about it to bring kids to a pro live demonstration have them chant and yell their school songs and and put on Magga hats like the whole thing is so up it's really well work I mean back to what I said about anxiety it's just we're at each other's throat like I mean I have a bit of my act about how like I feel like the internet was

106:42built for us to tear each other apart because we're just throwing darts and running away and and if you put us in room together and talk it out we I think we think we would mano a mano you know because we go to people we all want the same thing deep down inside we all want to take care of our kids we all want to have fun we all want a bountiful life you know but I also say like I'm also like I love people but I hate people like it's like you know it's like if you go through a whole day without speaking to another human being you ever had one of those days yeah that was awesome isolation that was delicious it's only if you have too much though right if you get around people too much then those gap days where you just you could just recharge yeah and then you appreciate people when you see them yeah and like do you get that where you where you go to you're on the way the Comedy

107:27Store you're like I want to go like I don't want to go up right now I'm like something's messed with me but it's like that with therapy comedy sometimes and the gym sometimes where it's like I don't want to go but every time I'm glad I did mmm yeah I know what you're saying I couldn't I could have a set where I'd eat and I'll Drive home laughing I'm just like well that didn't work the thing that bothers me most about this is that they won the docs these kids and Paula address out there in favor of that ever it's just so foolish ever they're treating them like they're rational adults that are you know 50 years old they really know what they're doing no it's not gonna solve anything so you're not gonna convert these kids hearts and minds by ruining their lives no you know I do understand the double standard we have had with like black youth though where

108:10it's kind of like you know this kid gets strangled to death for selling cigarettes but yeah he's a criminal it's like god damn it you know whereas these kids honestly because they're white or getting chance after chance after chance but I don't think their lives should be ruined it's like I feel like we've we've we've talked enough about it these kids did what they did let's move on yeah they will then you know who knows what they're getting chance after chance but during this situation like that's this is the consequences of social media the fact you could take a video of someone doing something incredibly stupid when they're 16 years old oh yeah and what they did was not even that stupid all he did to stand there and smirk he's being a but like I keep it y'see if he's just standing there someone comes up to him beating a drum how are you supposed to react I feel

108:53like the how do you think you would react like the kid walked up to that Native Americans did incorrect incorrect the kid was standing there the Native American walked up to him buying the drum okay walked happen what do you mean the guy was stay at that kid wasn't in the video while the Native American gentleman was standing there pounding his drum and there are kids around him but that kid though the Maine kid wasn't there he walked he ended up walking up to him yeah okay but with the video that I saw the kid was standing there and that guy walked up to him here's the thing and this is two hours there's there's video of these people that's two hours long and the video that I saw those kids were standing there chanting and that guy walked to those kids and was beating his drum if that one specific kid walked down but still that guy instigated it by walking to

109:42them beating the drum not only that that guy got in that kid's face and beat that drum inches away from his face but I thought about that kid I thought that kid walked up to the to the name of America I'm not sure the Native American I walked up to the whole group okay it's haven't seen all that all of that video a Native American guy said that they were saying build that wall build that wall but there's no evidence of that okay the guy the the problem is the guy's a human get Native American guy's a human right yeah and he's probably not prepared at all for this kind of scrutiny no and no one is there's a lot there was an interview that he did with CNN that is just full of holes okay and it doesn't match up to the video it doesn't match up to what happened and is like there's the salt you could pull that video I'll pull that article did but you try to find that article the CNN

110:31article there was an article about the article that I read either way yeah I'm just I'm just inundated at this point with all of it I will say like you know I've I've said for years probably 15 20 years now I'm so glad YouTube did not exist when I was in high school oh my god because you're just a book yeah Twitter the things you would say on Twitter uh-huh snapchat or any of those things yeah and I mean I I did not grow up like you know my parents generation being mildly racist if you're white you know I I grew up pretty woke as the kids say in Portland Oregon so well you're in Chicago Chicago is pretty left-wing well Chicago I wasn't there until I was born in Chicago but I grew up in Portland oh yeah but it was also - it's funny we had we had we had right-wing Nazi groups moving in when I was in high school gangs from LA and then from Central Oregon and and further toward Idaho you

111:31had you had this this guy named Metzger who had like a little little camp you could go and party in if you've seen American history acts it was just like that drink free beer and they played punk rock music and the thing that everyone misses when they look at those groups be it a gang or a white supremacist skinhead group or whatever it's it's it's a community first for people and that's where they look at it first and then they a foreign community sadly over focusing hate but I just feel like yeah I'm which kid so they're all they walked up to him being in there banging the drums and he's standing there okay there's a kid right but he's just standing there the guy walked right up to him you're showing me in the video the guy walking up to the kid and this is exactly what I said Jamie he walked right up right kid my point here was this the video I mean aren't these kids all mocking the

112:26traditional American rhythm but Jamie that Native American guy just walked up to that kid and got in his face it's clear as day it says I was just bringing up this like this angle here he's standing here there's a group of kids around him to give to the kids he walked up to the kids and he walked up to that kid specifically got in his face there was a certain amount of separation between them he walked to the kid and got in his face while he's beating the drum okay play it again yeah so he's walking he's walking and the kid standing there and when the kid standing there he walks up to the kid sowho and they're doing the tomahawk chop chop do you think it's funny do they understand that people are filming they don't so here he goes the whole thing is so strange so strange because what are you supposed to do when someone walks up to you beating a drum so

113:24there's the kid the kids standing there and the Native American guy now walks up to them completely violating a space now imagine if this is a man doing this to a woman you'd say okay he's violating her space a hundred percent this is up and aggressive and that's what this guy's doing he's singing in this kid's face it's a little kid and what is the kid supposed to do I don't know it should he walk away yeah should he say I'm sorry that someone in the past stole your ancestors land what did you do yeah I mean it's no I'm not saying yes do that I'm saying what is the like the question is what does a kid do but I mean these it's just he's I get why these guys approach him because there's just a it's a river of people mocking him right and his culture I get it but why this one kid and why why get right in this guy's face or you're beating a drum inches from this kid's face yeah that is the

114:16question and what look it's the hat man that goddamn polarizing stupid hat hate that had so much look at he's even closer to him he's put the drum off to the side so he can get closer to this kids face means the expecting the kid to walk away I don't know but the kid doesn't do anything but still he's blinking because the the beating of the drum is so close to his eyes it's weird yeah the whole thing is very weird so weird staring that kid down I mean why wouldn't you walk away just don't know everyone else walked away but what does he have to doesn't happen he's standing there and the guy decides to get in his face I think you would walk away probably on me I would I would definitely move I think I would probably move too cuz I'll be scared that guy got in my face like that I think that guy was gonna hit me I would think something is gonna go wrong I'm like this is just

115:10too weird it's not the kids he's 16 yeah grown-ups fault for getting in a 16 year old kids face beating a drum yeah it's that hat man what's also the he that the Native American man rightly felt like he was being yeah and then his traditions and his heritage is being mocked and these little kids yeah I mean I don't think he had the right to walk up on the kid like that but it's like where is your breaking point but wait a minute I don't think he doesn't have the right but this is where confrontation comes from do you have the right to make confrontation yet maybe perhaps may perhaps but that's not really the best way to communicate you're singing a song a Native American song and he doesn't know what the you're singing right and you're doing it inches from his face yeah and everyone's felt it it's a really a sign of the time said if people took clips of that and

116:00they made it out like this little kids that can't and even raise a Aslan head on his have you ever seen a more punchable face like then it's you're calling for violence on a kid is that what you're doing it's it's it's the same you know level of and again you know those kids like even when you were pulling that clip up I could feel my stomach make a fist from like that's just I don't want to see this but you know like it it's like that dude that that that his that that kid at the cub game who had the game in his in his earphones and he caught the ball which the outfielder was definitely not gonna catch anyway and they blamed him for the Cubs loss of the series and he hadn't scored that kid out yeah and I thought the kid reached forward though he did but I if you look at the tape I don't think that the outfielder had it now al fitter was pointing like you up

116:48kid like you ruined it and it was kind of this well I understand when you're playing major league ball one mistake could mean the end of your career and your family's a man what I saw I think that's different when I saw that I thought that kid up the game it it could be argued yes you know what I'm talking abut that's like you're staying there it's blaming one tiny play on the entire game and the fact the fact that back to what your point of punch the kid in the face that kid had to be escorted out of Wrigley Field whereas people were going to kill him right we were drunk people that were going to throw hit that kid in the traffic can we see that video of the guy I think that kid actually did up that game I think the difference is that kid reached into the playing field what he did was definitely wrong yeah and legal and let's see yeah let's check it out tail the table

117:35cracks here's the ball it's going it's going it's going wait a minute let me say one more time back that up no no just back it up I mean I think I take it back I had I had I think there one more time oh yeah they stole if they stole it from him it so you take it all back he had the ball I take it all back that kid it up yeah they literally did he took it he literally took it from him in the playing field oh you little oh he's good yeah spray-on I'm people probably through beers on them probably but yeah but what is the thing of like threatening a kid's life that's crazy but also it's like if you're a kid and the balls right there yeah you're gonna reach for it you're not gonna be thinking this guy's gonna catch or not gonna catch it's like you have the chance to catch the ball it's right there yeah you're gonna catch it yeah did you see that clip from Letterman

118:44like from like I don't know 30 years ago or something and he just there was a it was like the lineup was this famous person this famous person than just a Rando like a name you're like who and he brought this guy out and it was like a middle-aged guy in a ball cap and he's like Letterman's like you know I just I think you're the greatest living American and the guys like well he's like roll the table and they show just like that homerun and it's going it's going it's going and this guy's just has a beer and he's not looking and that you're here they announced you go oh my god and the ball hits the beer and the guys like gets hit and he's like oh and everyone's kind of laughing at him is like a homerun there's my beer and then innings later same line same run same guy and now she goes you have got to be kidding and the the baldest hits the same guy like again like twice same

119:34game and it was it was like you know minor league or something like that like you'd never it would it was wouldn't be unlike that Nightly News but it was just like what are the odds how many people have ever been hitting a head by a line drive oh that would you up that would hurt like you'd be she saw you'd never be the same again though when I was a kid Tony Conigliaro in Boston during the the Red Sox it was actually like I was very young at the time might actually have happened before I lived there but it was like the store that everybody was told he got hit in the head with a pitch yeah I was never the same again and it was one of the reasons why they started wearing padding helmets yeah there was a kid who got hit in the chest and his heart stopped oh that yeah cuz that doesn't happen that often but it just it just makes your heart just go whoop it just knocks it

120:25out oh jesus it's a rock coming with leather yeah you know I mean you feel a hard ball that thing is dense uh-huh yeah I mean soccer was originally kicking a head around but that's what it asked that culture yep like it was after like a battle they just take a head and kick it around and that was like where the game is that where soccer came from what from what I've read yeah I knew they had some weird Mayan game where they they played football and Mayan that's one thing okay and I think that they decided they used to think that they played and then the winner sacrificed the losing team and now there was also some speculation that it could have been the opposite that the winning team was sacrificed it was like but I might have been the slowest game ever you scored again but the idea was that you would play with such courage knowing that you were gonna win and then you're

121:28gonna get killed but you still wanted to win it's yes the level of Honor that it was had to be like so high or like my my family will never want for anything ever again so I'm just gonna or the level of drugs yeah you're taking deep for the belief it's like you know a assassin come from hashishin you know where this guy would just do it yeah is this guy in what we call the Middle East basically he was like how do you kill a king you got to get an assassin who doesn't care if he dies and so what did I he built a garden of delights where he had naked women just hanging around like prostitutes and like flowing water falls and he would just get a peasant and smoke him up so much and he was like do you want to see heaven and he'd be like yeah and he'd take him in the room and be like check it out and he's like I have the door to heaven and if you kill the Sultan in the town

122:20square tomorrow you're here and so a guy would just run up and stab this guy to death and the guard would murder him but that was how you get a guy you trick a person so it's kind of like it's the same probably the same thing where that level of drugs where you're like if I win they cut my head off but I go to Valhalla or whatever their version of having is human sacrifice is always such a strange thing like a living life to the gods yeah this was a such a common thing yeah it's like going to the game are you go you go watch that guy get his heart torn out yeah I'm taking my kid get some popcorn couple Bud Lights I was reading that book it's not primate what is it called simian sapiens sapiens sapiens and there there's there's a story about certain cultures that were would kill like the older people aha they would kill like oh and this guy would killed a few of his aunts and all

123:27the old women were terrified of him well he would sneak up behind them when they got too old because they were you know their gases are there's a lot of people and even hit him with an axe okay and they're talking to these people and I'm like Jesus Christ imagine you gonna kill your aunt with an axe well it imagine getting to a certain like your birthday party blow out the candles just spin around it off get away from me yeah he's expendable yeah one of the crazy stories that I ever heard was during the temple I think you say teal took on the one of the large Aztec temples when they completed the temple they sacrificed something like 80,000 people over the course of two days though yeah but pull that up temple of to akan I think it's outside of Mexico City and when the Aztecs constructed this when it was finally completed they essentially sacrificed all the slaves that were used

124:23to bow my god yeah so they just covered this gigantic temple with blood of 80,000 people that they butchered on the spot yeah Oh God over days took days to kill everybody that's a lot of that's a lot of butchering that's a lot of murder that's that's that's that's exhausting levels yeah it's so much so that I had told a friend this story and he was like that's not true I'm like I'm telling you true why these guys doing the math I had to we had to get to a place where their service and Google it yeah it's just daunting yeah thousand people and these are the very people that built the thing well I mean that was the way that's what they do now we're done all right kill him well that was one of the the weirder things about going to Chichen Itza was there's this one platform that was just designed for sacrifice Wow could kill people on this platform and it's like it was set up

125:20like a bench like those legs and a head like someone was holding this bench in place so they would just chop a head off and it roll down the stairs had to probably like a little a little head slide kind of thing what do you think the fascination with that is like this this idea of killing someone to appease the gods and it was it because everyone was afraid to die so that when you could force someone to do it in front of everyone before someone to die in front of everyone and sacrifice them so just it would long as it was like there was enough distance yeah in you and them they'll get this charge of excitement and very Machiavellian for sure it's it's you know power perceived as power achieved you see anyone can die right and fall in line real fast right and I think it's also the the unpredictability of life itself yeah it's like hey look we're gonna kill 80 people but we're

126:12gonna have no no storms for the next couple months like it's no one I know yeah fuck'em especially if you have some like elder who like some shaman who tells you that this is the only way we're going to stop storms yeah yeah yeah people believe anything she gets a tempo too if I only found it it says somewhere between there's a recorded article in 2011 poets story today 84,000 people but says this was a disputed number could be it's down the 4,000 maybe the numbers disputed however some say as few as 4,000 were sacrificed and what was actually a recon secretion of the templo mayor in 1487 nevertheless scores were killed cheese hmm so the one thought is 1487 the Aztecs recorded that 84 thousand people were slaughtered in four days self-sacrifice was common in individuals would pierce their owners tongues and genitals to nourish the floors of the temples with their blood unsurprisingly

127:07there is evidence that Mexico was already suffering from a demographic crisis before the Spanish arrived you know the Spanish probably came in at the perfect time yeah this is how you say it the Great Pyramid of T note at lon T no chitchat lozzaine they say it that seems that seems like I've seen that very differently no chillin - no - no chit long - no chit long does it tell you how's that - no in pronunciation whites whites no no - no chit blonde yeah I think that's right yeah come up with better names bro yeah anyway a lot of people Jesus it also said those games that they were playing where the people were decapitated that might have been rigged they weren't sure if they were rigged but they might have been faked with games - whoops I lost I mean people like better they're more fun those guys yeah yeah these guys you want around get us all tickets I mean we kill those guys we

128:22blow you know we got no one in the stadium right the whole game it is weird that all cultures agree that one of the best ways to appease the masses to have these large sporting events people gather round to watch this mock war if take place yeah yeah like how the the went when Shaka Zulu came in they were just fighting like Mach Wars and they were just like with fake you know swords and and then Spears and he just ran out sort of stabbing well I mean like what are you doing he's like I'm trying to win yeah it doesn't work that way bro trying to fake it yeah yeah like if we escalated past like football and football like something way more violent came along yeah but not quite war like duels Jesus I know it's like I'm I'm I'm glad we're not there as much as I have my problems with like concussions and football and stuff and it's just just yeah I guess that's a good like what what's what be

129:24the next thing you can kind of get away with playing football if you get out early enough yeah but even they say they're saying that even kids in high school have CT yeah yeah it's brutal do you see what they do in Russia where they have those five-on-five MMA fights they have gang fights they mean on football fields yes you put up in it's like somewhere in Eastern Europe and it's just one big like bald bull looking guy fighting like five guys oh yeah yeah yeah yeah I think that's Russian - yeah these couple guys decided to try to take on a giant yeah that guy was a giant that guy was like a dude that like breaks rocks and like fee fie foe fum I smell the blood of an Englishman fee fie foe fum yeah that's kids even learned that story anymore the fee fie foe fum yeah won't they write some new ones why are we telling these old our stories yeah I loved you see that movie about the about

130:21the the troll hunter where that guy like goes out and like the the end of Scandinavia and he's he hunts trolls there's actual giant monster troll oh yeah remember that that was a fun stupid move it was fun and one thing I loved about it was it was like or any of you a Christian tell me right now right now and they're like no and as one guy who like secretly was and the troll could smell his blood it's such an awesome angle oh no it's just like that's cuz he's like he's like a scientist he's like I know what these guys are after they want to chew up Christian people see if you can find and find the clip for the trailer for troll hunter because it's so stupid it's so does it it's a good movie to get high and watch yeah well I love stuff that's like there's a giant thing in the distance like coming that's like that's a big thing if I'm high where I'm just

131:10like what if King Kong just came from behind that building right now yeah he's a volume sometimes you get to see a unique film imagine that really war trolls just it's just eating goats yeah this is like a foreign film yeah it's it's somewhere in its Canyon like I think Norway well that's a lot of people think it says do you think Michael Moore gave up after the first try oh yeah documentary like yeah yeah exactly they're doing like a Blair Witch Project thing but with trolls yeah yeah we give me a little distance in this I'm tired of seeing this build up I want to see the control yeah they showed the trailer for sure dig don't I'm Christian I love that just mush that guy so many trolls if there was something that big we would have never gotten to where we are we'd all been holed up in caves right now yeah well they'd probably like the tank millionaires are like the guys who like

132:39control one of those like he's just sitting on his head and he's like kill those people you know crush that house you know you think it'd be tech millionaires it would do now but that are the richer richer Spit person no it would not be a tech person you I think you have a troll you'd be sitting on a troll yeah Zuckerberg he would have a troll he would he would pay someone to like train a troll or something like that you find like a troll trainer and then let me ask you that are you worried at all about AI yes are you oh yeah I just wonder when it's gonna get out of our control because it's the technology's escalating beyond our comprehension but yet you drive a Tesla yeah I do you're contributing to it a little bit a little bit yeah I mean it's I look we all are it's you know I I am I am a in a lot of ways I'm an idiot in a lot of ways and I just like I

133:34know you can hack a Tesla I know you can yeah but they're awesome yeah no I've a car I love it they're there apparently not doing so well it was some article that I read today where they were they were talking about the letter that Elon Musk's sent to all the people that worked for him saying that you're you're gonna have to work harder but our goal is to try to save the world yeah like even nobody wants to hear that and they work for a company I mean and and and and and really that's not what you're going for before well I think his goal is ultimately to reduce our attachment to fossil fuels which you know can help save yes our environment mm-hmm I'm definitely with that yeah you know cut way down on factory farming with meat you know yeah I'm I'm all in favor with all this all that stuff and making way more things electrics like why don't we have solar panels on

134:27literally everything especially California yeah I mean we have Sun everywhere everywhere and we have an amazing source of light but apparently you know there's a lot of money involved I know that sounds crazy there's a lot of money involved in staying with the grid as it is sure they got to keep those nuclear power plants running we love them so much driving to San Diego sightseeing well the old ones they didn't even have a way to shut down like old power plants when they had make them yeah they can't stop them they're probably figured we'll figure it out eventually late let's put it off yeah one day we'll figure someone smarter than us to come along they'll fix it yeah you when you you really hear about natural disasters and solar flares and asteroid impacts you just realize how fragile this weird system that we have of a power grid and satellites to distribute information and

135:23the Internet is actually a bunch of wires on the ocean floor that connect us to Europe like what there's wires that are four thousand miles long really yeah yeah yeah that it's it's it's kind of like the human body like it's remarkably resilient but it's so fragile yeah super fragile yeah one infection that's a wrap yeah uh-huh yeah get if someone's drunk enough they can fall off a building hit everything going down and land like something made a nerf and get up sometimes right I've watched a video of a guy who was in a high-speed chase with the cops and he had a Corvette and he flipped the Corvette and literally went flying out of it like he was a doll so head over heels head over heels guys fine yeah landed on his back on a desert floor what you got some volume playing in the background jam you can hear that too those things they pop up by radio interference I've been hearing some

136:19times I can't tell if you guys are hearing it oh really I've heard it a couple of times but yeah you ever heard songs in your fillings some people have recorded that they hear radio sounds in their feelings yes like take yeah they pick up wavelengths yeah like your feeling will somehow or another yeah catch some radio sound and play it in your photo madney was it so awful you hear like Mexicans radio station playing out of your mouth yeah no flyer to your mouth in the middle of the night so you can sleep Oh brutal mmm well listen dude you're special when it comes out will be available in February February 5th and oh they'll be available everywhere yes you'll be able to get it on to tell me all the places on am Amazon Google Play I think it's gonna be on Steam weirdly enough the video game platform it's gonna be all over the place you can stream it you can buy it it's gonna come

137:21out and vinyl eventually but I know yeah a couple like a prob about a thousand out in vinyl of people who know yeah I mean I I it's called final finally live in Portland and all the whole title is like fake tattoos like dummies would you film it at the Paris a former porn theater in downtown Porto they had a porn theater and I was a kid there were always like you know and butts and stuff like that on the conic on the marquee and then it was yeah so that'll be that'll be the cover the vinyl that helium in Portland is amazing I love that Club I told them where to put it they were like where would you put a comedy club I was like Southeast Portland close to the water so people who live on the west side can come across the bridge really easy you'll have a lot more space that way and yeah they've kept it running strong it's it's awesome it's a great place to perform

138:09yeah yeah it's a great that's another one just design with the low ceiling and you gotta come on advice from a okay because it's you would kill it okay I can see I'm giving shitty advice yes all right yeah man perfect yeah well thank you brother this is a joy I'm how to get a hold of you it's just Braunger on Instagram yeah and Twitter just be are a un ger and then Matt Braunger comm for all my shows that's me bye everybody thanks Joe thank you that was great