Krystyna Hutchinson & Corinne Fisher

00:00yeah great we got two I love you could pick the front of the back that's an interesting way to start oh wait you can it we're talking about these toilets that have built in it's not really a bad day it's more like a but cleaner right but these are kind of crude you ever use a bidet cleaner what it is but it's not good at it no this was but cleaner the stream of water was the perfect size and pressure and I have had I mean if we want to get into it right you know right off the bat I've had an anal orgasm before with a vibrator and only once in my life and that thing I was like if I stayed on here like ten more minutes I could get yeah I think it could a lot of gals out there taking notes I was like I think I just used like diaper wipes in my butt yeah that's good too but I like to think about it like you know like if my beard if I had like smeared all over my

00:54beard would that be cool with a diaper wipe and just going out in public I don't think so well I mean so there are ideas to powerwash it yeah say to my face though I'd scrub it full shower full showers would he go put my head in a tub of water for a little bit they're very smart with a bidet and the bidet never caught on here in America they just went with paper which gets caught in your butt and it gets caught if if you're a girl with not a neatly tucked vagina like most women it gets caught in there yeah little pieces break off with that soft yeah that's why I use Scott Brandt eyelet paper instead of Charmin everyone thinks I'm being cheap and I'm like no I just don't want toilet paper stuck in my vagina do you ever wipe your dick with a little paper or not it's just your bottle no I don't even the drivel what do you move the drip just drop it right back everywhere don't worry about it

01:44right back in the chamber yeah it's not not a concern nice let's just I've always wondered that yeah it's different I mean girls you know it's obviously not as efficient a delivery method you know well you really got to be careful about the wiping front to back what do you got I know right once my young daughter got sick from that Oh learned the hard way yeah she didn't understand and we were in on vacation actually she get a fever yeah like 300 yeah yeah it's like you know you wanna like even if you tell them it doesn't make sense to them right you know back-to-front is the way you normally would go but then you got to do it your head until your arms get longer yeah yeah and then you gotta lift your leg I can reach all the way around now do you wipe your ass with your leg up on the toilet no I signed up to wipe my ass not in there if you squat though you

02:40could get in the butthole area better mm-hmm it's true I always do a Captain Morgan stance to clean out the area when I stand up in wait instance was that he went yet he is Oh in the leg up on the barrel cuz when you stand up you got a wipe and wipe it why I meant when you're like what is this gonna end yeah well that's why I think every toilet should really I mean it would it be hard to have one of those jet things and every toilet it doesn't seem that I don't think that's a big ask yeah my concern is so like if you're squirting and then like poop grumbles they're coming out and they're going back down like could it ever then hit the thing that's squirting on me and then could poof squirt that gun Wow that's my that's my main concern well there's bigger concerns in life but that is one no I mean we're justice if eclis talking about toilet concerns

03:26though that major one I don't think that because of the water pressure I don't think the you would have to have all like a like a shitty prairie-dogging we're sexperts well your human sex is in some way a sexpert yeah that's our platform because we don't work we're not experts at all I I said the other day to Corrine what's the name of the hole that hugs the tampon she was like wow okay we did look it up because people call the whole thing the vagina and that's inaccurate the trainer's are so complicated how the whole whole thing is not a vagina no that's inaccurate that just the the sex hole is the vagina the whole thing the vagina but that's not technically accurate so if the doors are closed and you're looking on the outside hey that's a vagina like nope that's not technically correct my labia that's labia you're looking at their house the church here is the staple let

04:33me tell you I think it's gross the operation where they remove labia lips that seems so goddamn baby a plasti yeah somebody actually because that doesn't do your vaginas fully functioning and it works fine it's just ascetic and then if you get the surgery and it goes awry that's not good somebody had emailed us once about Dane Cook had a bit about like meaty lips a while ago and she got labiaplasty because of that bit I like ting cockle up and I had talked about that because I was watching his special and I just put my hands over my face I was like this is not what we need it all know what's gonna do it cuz he said that it's a joke he's a comic cute comic so then you're like should I do it not me personally I mean but it also desensitizes the area a lot so you're imagine you're cutting meat stitching things back up and things get numb like I had knee surgery in the

05:32slight there's a slice down my knee that I had this knee operated on in 1994 and it's still numb oh wow yeah the skin like where they did what's called a patellar tendon graft with it oh my god they cut us a long slice they took a piece of your patella they pull that out and then they stitch it inside the knee and that area in the front where they took the scar like where the scar is it's numb so she's no nerves nerve endings there I don't feel well it feels noticeably different than the sides like that one strip where the scar is damn very different so imagine that your yeah I was like a magnet your pussy's your knee and that just so what's the point of life what's the point of living now I'm always just an envision your knee is as my yeah whenever I see you knee opening yeah yeah and that's why babies come out otherwise you have to get c-sections and

06:23then the baby doesn't get the produces on the baby and I don't get the right bacteria right ya know there's a notepad here I'm taking winter line they say that a baby born by cesarean section especially elective cesarean section it's actually unhealthy for the baby's immune system doesn't gets money exactly they're not mashed when they come out it looks like I got a facebook photo ready facetune we've heard that we didn't know what face tuning was we've been in in a life like three days we've heard faced tuning you know you can auto-tune Britney Spears voice so it sounds listenable to the general public you can also do that to your face what yeah so it's like it's an app and then but beyond filters you actually can like take your finger and if my I think my face looks too fat I can smudge it in so that it's thinner but then you meet somebody in person they're like oh fatty

07:27celebrities do it apparently oh come on well not not you well the weird ones do but see the thing is like if you're doing that and then someone meets you in person like that was the issue with you know the kim kardashian mexico pictures you know that's a whole thing no Kim Carter could imagine I love that so I am Kim Kardashian brings photographers with her and they pretend that she's getting paparazzi totally she hires these people then they take the photos and then they doctored the photos they photoshopped them and then they release them as candid photos well she went down to Mexico and some real paparazzi were there some real unpaid ones and they got unretouched ass shots and it is a model really well it's not cellulite here's the thing it's fat taken out of her body and stuffed into her ass to give her this diaper look and I don't it's a it's a meat diaper and

08:21you don't realize how gross it looks until you see it in real life I've seen one of those in real life and it's chaotic I've only seen him with pants on I haven't seen him naked but I saw one I was like what in the are you doing your body it's chaos sucking fat out of your sides and your the inner thigh and all this like look at that whoa what in the is what the is a diaper I don't think it looks that bad Oh Ukraine would you say let's find the Mexico pictures because there's the there was paparazzi pictures of her walking on the beach okay whoa see that that is not even the bad ones this is me like her more why because she's not perfect I think women eise's her okay but wait a minute she's projecting a fishy affection yeah and that's her business anyone who thinks in guard is cat Kardashian is actually perfect is ridiculous we're young I mean have an

09:13impressionable yeah yeah but people were held up to way higher standards you look at that and you go oh my god how can I be like that it's not celebrities job to be role models though yes it's a parent's job or guardians job to step in and be like maybe you have maybe Ruth Bader Ginsburg never heard of her well that's true the reality is if you're a little kid and you're paying attention to online stuff without supervision and you're hanging out with Yan's at school you're gonna be affected by this cuz this woman makes hundreds of millions of dollars she's super glamorous she's on television and you find out that she got fat stuffed into her ass to make that face it's annoying because she cheated kinda that's what it feels like it's like well if you're if you're projecting this image of perfection and then it's like well not that's not really that's a lot of work

09:55to get them you paparazzi that you hire to that edit it and then put it out like as just casually on the beach in her defense it's a business it is business is this you know looking I mean I would just play nursing a sentence to my child and be like you know it doesn't matter you could say that but if you're a 16 year old girl and you know you see her on television you see her one time and there certainly were people who looked hotter but I still turned out okay and like I don't by any means have a perfect ten body but she I truly love myself and my body body I don't have any problems with it and I still ingested a lot of this kind of like fluffy pop culture I actually love pop culture it's my favorite things like just a name information about celebrity but this is a different kind of pop culture because this is pop culture that it's famous for just being hot yeah if this is at what I

10:54would call it Instagram culture like these Instagram model and everything you do have to be careful about that because even I find myself at 32 flipping through Instagram and going like wow there's a lot of work to do you know there's some dude I don't know who he was some some black guy I don't know he was he just was some funny dude who had this video post about Instagram girls saying I want to thank all my fans goes yo listen you don't have fans I'm just a pervert if you keep showing pictures your ass I'll keep looking yeah that and stop pretending that you've got some talent that's uncomfortable comfortable you don't need talent to have fans though sadly you just gotta be high I sometimes there are people who I'm just fans of their ass don't you not fans of anyone's ass bodies like yeah I guess I'm a fan of looking at Kim Kardashian and I have no

11:50problem saying I am she was funny that's one of my points pointing it out like you're like well let's go break it down specifically yeah don't put me on this hierarchy of a fan I'm down here jerkin off iam a bedroom yeah I'm a fan of certain musicians right exactly I don't follow you around although some people do but ya know Corrine was always very naturally confident and she's the only the person I know that's a woman that is actually confident we must know someone else do we know just like the way you are confident is very unique because she truly doesn't give a my only talent no one comes up to me and they're like is Corinne Corinne sick really insecure right like she's honestly not thank you very nice are you confident are you insecure what's your insecurities um I'm pretty confident I guess but everyone's insecure a little a little bit being a human you worry about

12:41your own mortality you worry about all the things that we're gonna I'm constantly worried about that yeah constantly worried about everything you worried about your health you're worried about your social status well position in society your friends worry about your health is an insecurity though that's just I mean no so insecurity Cayuse security like it's a broad definition isn't it like do you think it insecurity what do you think of just like how people perceive you that don't know you I think you know constantly trying to make up for something that you feel like you're lacking in like an area you're lacking in so a lot of people aren't confident you know in their intelligence their how funny you know whatever occupation you are that you're not the best in it I mean I constantly think I have things to work on I'll never be satisfied until I'm the best which will never happen so

13:30it's just a constant low the best anything existing existing anything I want to do I'm like I want to try to do and I don't I try not to do things if I don't think that I can excel in them which is why I don't have fun it's so true it's very true you don't have any fun we did go to Universal Studios yesterday that was fun fun I don't mean I don't I don't like fun what yeah I like I have a bit about how I don't like fun and I and I don't know why I just I like working as opposed to fun like just frivolous fun if I feel like it's like a waste of like just hanging out I have a hard time just like hanging out yeah yeah like a hard time relaxing if you're not doing something that's why I like hang out with Christina Chris means my friend but we're also getting work done it I'd say when we were in Universal we were in line we were creating the intro for the show last night and we were

14:17always working yeah that's cool which I discovered psychedelics and I feel like that's the only kind of like that's the release that I need hmm so you don't enjoy like recreational activities like you don't want to go fishing or whitewater rafting that's athletic so I feel like that is productive because I'm making my body stronger so I do like stuff like that there has to be a purpose to it yeah I'm not fun I like skiing but it's because I was like I'm doing something I'm learning a new skill I'm getting exercise yeah no one's ever like au courant our party with that girl no yeah no I need gosh I mean unless I'm drinking which or yeah like DMT or something yeah then that's super fun she's so sweet when she's drunk it's so weird cuz she like gives you compliments and you never hear a compliment from her and she's like you look really good tonight Christy I'm like wasted you

15:05always look good though I think it's important to space out compliments so that they're really powerful when you space them out yeah when you give them at rational yes yes yes exactly interesting you see you see you see Mitch white what is going on in your head right now nothing just trying to figure out why you know like why you would issue fun why you would I mean it's not it's not a bad thing that's great you're gonna get more work done but has it served you well yes I mean you sitting here hey absolutely it does have a great name for a podcast by the way thank you thank you I use you guys an example all the time and when you do people email us they tweet us and we go up like 10 positions in the podcast charts all of them like god damn I know my manager was like the Rogen bump yeah so great yeah well i usual of people that didn't have like a big social media profile or a big you

16:00weren't on big TV shows because it's good yes it's fun like how you guys banter with each other to you almost finish each other's sentences and you almost talk over each other but you don't it's like you have like you have a thought and you interject with your thought while you're having a thought and then you pick up your thought right after her it's like you guys have danced yes yeah well we've been working together for many years before the podcast so I think and there was a lot of episodes of guys who thought that I'd have to go back and listen to and be very embarrassed by how many times I interrupted the guest or her and so it's hard right when you're enthusiastic and you're it is hard and someone's talking you don't know when to do it yeah but secret twin language we do we've said like the same sentence for long sentence at the same time it is very creepy we'll talk with our eyes

16:47when we're doing like a live show and know exactly what what the next thing we need to do is yeah now when you say you guys work together before you did the podcast what you do where our karma deal is called sorry about last night so we did stand-up shows we would produce we did two women show at UCB we would do sketches video sketches just anything we thought was funny and this was one of the the impetus for the podcast was a breakup Corrine got dumped in a Panera Bread and it was like the worst I've ever seen anybody handle a breakup meeting like they really took a toll on her and that's not good she doesn't show a lot of emotion so I like to see her cry I was like oh and then one day she texted me she's like we should just interview every guy we've ever a podcast which is called guys we and I was yeah actually that's yeah that's good I like how you call it an anti

17:36slut-shaming podcast - that was uh yeah that's right that was my addition that needs to stop yeah it's a ridiculous why do you agree it's ridiculous and also you need to stop slut-shaming yourself I think a lot of people do that to themselves yeah and I gotta say like I feel like guys we is the Female Viagra because it gets women have written us like I want to go out and have sex because now I know how to communicate what I want I know it's not weird to say what I want it's not I don't not a if I sleep with somebody on the first date ever one-night stand it's like that's really cool well I think this country we still have the echoes of the Puritans that landed here yeah there's some weird sexual politics that go on this country there's some weird way that we have of viewing sex that I think is directly connected to the original way this country was founded he's like some

18:24serious prudishness that exists in America that doesn't exist in other places and some people yeah it's a good thing because they think that we get more work done because of it that our society is more geared towards productivity and getting ahead as opposed to some societies that don't but if you if you stifle a part of yourself though that's gonna come out somehow and that's why people sexually assault is a the repression I think you can people act out sexually religion any religion that represses people that relieve it it's like you're gonna explode one day Catholicism I mean it's the classic example there's if there was as many people in NASCAR that kids as Catholic priests how quick would they shut down NASCAR yes very quickly like religion is so controlling but you can watch documentary after documentary you know the whole dealing on the whole story about Ratzinger who was the last

19:14pope he was he was wanted for crimes against humanity I mean this guy literally cannot leave Rome if he goes to certain places he could be tried for crimes against humanity what he did when he was a bishop or whatever the the position they call he was taking priests that were molesting kids and covering it up and moving them to another parish he moved one priest to a place where he molested 100 deaf kids oh god yeah and this was a hundred percent factual proven non-speculative I mean he's responsible for moving these people and the number of Catholic priests I mean first of all there's got to be some Catholic priests out there who were wonderful people and I'm sorry get lumped into this but the sheer number of Catholic priests that have been involved in most aiding molesting kids it's stunning yeah we had a guy emailed and so was in Boston and was molested by one of the priests and he

20:12got interviewed on the by the that breaking piece about them we get one thing I've learned from doing guys we though that really surprised me I feel like 85% of the population has either been molested as children or raped or sexually assaulted in some way like some big way not just like groping and it's I had no idea was that common and then I thought back I'm like I like I had one time I went to this doctor decided getting blood work so I picked a general doctor and he was like it was his old man he's like I'm gonna give you a breast exam I was like huh okay and then I and he went real slow with it and then I left I put my shirt back on and we left the doctor's office and I was walking home and I was like wait a second oh god damn it yeah and then I turned it on the get sexually assaulted but you didn't realize until afterwards there's been a series of doctors that

21:05have been arrested for drugging their patients and then molesting while they're under the cameras some patients had suspected it and so they had done the investigation and put hidden cameras and caught the doctors feeling them out even caught doctors having sex with patient oh yeah these are things that I maybe just need to know know there's some creeps out there people are I mean I know cuz you're I you're from Jersey as well right born there but I only lived there tow seven okay cuz I was like my grandfather was in the hospital for cancer when that angel of death I don't know if you heard about this doctor those Camaro like killing people and we're pretty we're pretty sure that's what happened to you he died like pretty abruptly and it's like I don't know it's like I'm actually refer my mom's gonna kill me I'm really revealing a tear but she had said something to me privately

21:53and I guess it was just too upsetting you can't trust anybody does I mean damn it's not that you can't trust anybody's like you're gonna run into so many people that if just like we were talking before the podcast started about social media but like one out of ten if you have nine people that are awesome and then one out of ten is just a creep you get upset yeah god damn it it makes you want a sick day off now think about running into people how many hundreds of people you run into all it takes is one creep and so it's not that you can't trust people it's just like you're gonna run into a certain amount of creeps just based on the numbers yeah yeah cuz the like the majority of people are not sexual predators are not giant pieces of but the ones that are really stick out I think what you're talking about too is big to about this oppression I think the suppression any sort of

22:39suppression of desires it it fosters that sort of creepy behavior yep it builds up and it looks for some sort of an outlet and that outlet comes out in really weird ways like I have a friend with Jim Norton pretty open about it yeah he loves dominatrix mm-hmm he gets he goes to them and all that kind of and one of the things that he tells me is that these ladies say that a giant percentage of their business is like really powerful CEOs button-down men who have to like be in control all the time have to you know have a very rigid profile that they're projecting to their company and that these guys love to get on kicked in the balls and you know they love to be told what to do yeah work hard play hard what's it's there's a there's a thing that's happening to people when you have to pretend to be something that you're not oh yeah that's why you find a lot of or

23:35I'm Jewish and so like a lot of Orthodox Jewish men are that there's oh there's a lot of you know hiring sex workers on the down-low and a lot of I mean this is a very broad statement to make but you know a lot of touching on the subway kind of behavior you see it more yeah did you see the that they're making sex robots that look really they look like actual women I mean you could tell it's a robot but it looks very close and I was thinking like because women have I think with women they they oppress themselves with their own sexuality and I'm like man women are the ones that should be getting the sex dolls because then we could feel what it's like to have sex without giving a with the person we're having sex with Thanks because it's a doll right and you can really go buck wild and let loose and be vulnerable right and if you can use a vibrator you could

24:24use a robot yeah oh I would love just to foreplay I just one of the toilet seats and then maybe I was these are dolls though these are guys who choose dolls as their life partners I did an article just once oh my what I wrote this article it's got contacted me and he told me he had severe acne when he was young and that he's disfigured he's never had sex with a woman and this is why and he said if you want if you want to ask me some questions I'd be happy to answer you it was all anonymously through email so he and I start going back and forth about this you know because he was upset that the article that I was mocking these guys that think that this is their girlfriend I see where you come from yeah I see his point to the mountain if you just he has an insecurity and he didn't want to be vulnerable with a person because you're risking the rejection and that rejection

25:18hurts but I feel like in addition to the repression thing though I think masculinity I watched this documentary called the mask I live in on Netflix it's so good and it points out these little things like little boys pick up like you know I was at a pool with my friend one summer and this dad was trying to get his son to jump in the pool and he was like come on don't be a girl jump in the pool and then they jumped in but those little tiny things get in your head and it gets the point where when you're a grown man you feel like you deserve or the getting or getting girls is gonna make you up you know raising status and that's that's up yeah it's also kind of perpetuating cycle because if you're an idiot and you raise kids that are idiots if your parents were dumb and they raised you you might have some really shitty ideas in your head that you got to iron out yeah sometimes it takes like

26:07a lot of life experience to figure out what those are and how you get them out if you if you ever are self-aware of and I feel when people go through their whole lives they never know 100% I mean there's a lot of people you run into that are 70 that are like I was watching this video on YouTube this guy he looked like he was in his late 60s and he was giving some Asian guy a hard time on the bus he was saying all this racing I watched I watch that too yeah Jesus crisis is an old guy you ask old God it also seemed a little not yeah he was a little mentally unstable yeah III the night I saw that video actually there was a guy do the same thing to a black I was at Panera Bread and there's this black I was working there and we're trying to get them to sponsor our tour I know you've cards instead and give him out as prizes at the show go but this guy he wasn't old but he was saying the

27:03n-word like really like very I was like I want to intervene but he might stab me was just saying it about someone to the to the employee and the employee was trying to brush I'm like oh god dammit that sucks and he he was obviously I don't know what the hell was up with him mentally but he had some some issues and he was talking himself and smacking himself and pushing his chair over and picking it back up and I was like you need to get the out of here man and then I like kind of like we're on our way I'm like don't hit me and but then he eventually left it was that Crimeline like when do you intervene if someone's mentally unstable yeah you can't fix them you know how to shame them now say you know they're talking to voices that aren't even talking to them so if you're you know if you say hey you need to get the out of here then they decide to shoot you yeah you know he realized that

27:49the guy wasn't there collate all their hopefully and was like this doesn't this doesn't matter this is the agent guy in the subway figured that out too right he was so chill yeah yeah I seen that a lot in New York City though people that seemed disturbed and then just going off on racist rants to people or their faces and like Jim oh yeah a whole lot of homophobic rants I've seen too like we straight up to gay people yeah but I mean again people who are who are as you say off I mean there was a guy not too long ago who just went up to the man sitting next to me and he was like yo I saw you looking at me you're looking at me I'm not like that I'm not gonna you and I'm this young woman this young woman did stuff very much like Christina and I'm kind of just thinking in my head I love to step in but that was not when someone is mentally unstable it's we just all

28:40realized like okay we're not gonna take anything this person saying to heart Subway's are so weird jamming that little thing with people and they know you can't get out not that feeling of vulnerability is always in the air and because of that people that are up will take advantage of that oh yeah it's also a great great place for sexual assault like almost of the sexual assaults I've experienced have been on the subway just hard elbow in them away the worst is when you're on the subway late at night and there's not many people in the cart and then you look up across from you and there's this guy with his hand down his pants he's going to town on his digging you're like I want to die and you make eye contact with them and you're like or when someone sits right next to you when there's absolutely no reason to do that yeah yeah yeah man yeah lot happens

29:23on the subway I've seen see people take a yeah they just take a early in the morning is bathroom usage time if you don't have a bathroom to go to in the subway no do they do it on the floor to do it over the edge on the floor on the floor they don't have that guy courtesy come on yeah they don't want to talk like homeless people I think so I would say yes but maybe one or two of them haven't been I don't know or just in a hurry people who seem on the floor for wow you morning me I think I only saw two how many have you seen Oh unless I ruined my favorite McDonald's for me once I've ruined an audition this guy like an elephant Titus of the dick his dick he had sweatpants on but it it was like a press it was like the size of that bought that wooden box in his pants and I'm like no way and then he was like I'm like oh no totally up the audition pants are out of

30:23the pants in the pants but his hands were outside of the pant so it might not have been real I don't know he was he was just doing a little jokey joke to pranksters like that was his thing hey if he was great prankster I really thought you up for years yeah for a while it was just south from Impractical Jokers oh yeah in prosthetics I know that San Francisco they have such a problem with people on this truth day of an app they have an app where you could find out where the human is and report out you can avoid it yeah they have like piles super-duper liberal almost at the point where they're like the creator like might be there they want to it's like super open-minded lefties that's where we invited the homeless man in San Francisco to do karaoke with oh it was the best night ever my brother lives there and he was like stop doing that why is the rent so expensive there then well I think

31:23they're trying to combat that by on the street that's a good tactic it leads to on the street see there's like a be near the Tenderloin right that's probably where a lot of people do they're oh my god I love San Francisco by the way but one of the things about them is that they're so progressive there's they're so left hard left that they just tolerate Amish people in like a really weird way yeah we we didn't know that a lot of the homeless people in San Francisco tend to have a reputation of being aggressive yeah and we were at karaoke this is I was like before I took the wee cookie of doom right well that was no I got it from a fan yeah but we there was a home we were having karaoke was after I show her with her brother and the friends and we were seeing it and it was just like a fun really fun night and there was this homeless guy comes up outside and he's just like

32:20looking in like he wants to cart a tree yeah he was like dancing to the music and it was like those scenes where you know everyone's having a fun warm Christmas inside and then little Tommy's outside going hmm and I was like Corinne we should and then Corinne like goes up and it's like come in you want to dance we bought him beers no it went so well really you're my brother reacted like you and I did everybody else and then the magic of the guys we Alice brought him in we did buy him a couple beers and then later found out he was an alcoholic pretty drunk so I was like this is not the day that he was gonna give a veteran get back on the wagon and I asked him about him in his life and you know when was last time you hung out like I was just asking him about himself and he seemed real like the way he was answering it was like no one ever asked me about me I'm like whoa he said it was

33:13like the best night of his life and then he did mildly grew up Christina we cookie at that point I really get groped a lot no no a situation it's like you know yeah a group for your service where did he grope me I love how I'm asking Corinne where and when a guy like a city released from the hug you know sometimes like normally a hug you release oh you don't have to slide to release wait a minute wait a minute though he was drunk right sure who knows if he even knew what he was I'm pretty I'm pretty fluent and groping but she didn't notice lines what she doesn't realize that are you sure you have the same definition as her touching someone's breasts without them wanting you to touch it is groping but it's tricky but if you have someone you're holding them on the side and use your hands I'm talking listen I'm not trying to know this guy lose his cami on house of cards

34:33you know it was it was it was an area one of the nono area I do remember going no no no don't ruin yourself for me please he got feely you guys were hanging out you had a few drinks he got feeling yeah yeah but I didn't get I didn't care I was happy that he had a good time and he was smiling not because he wasn't smiling cuz that hopefully yeah so there's like a spectrum for sexual assault yeah there is there's like there's like the casual like not quite touch your breasts but hey you went to feel weird you grab your this isn't a hug you're using your hands as underwire right yeah under tip on your hands is not good I could feel breasts on a hug new normal chest to chest hugs are good because right hands move too good if I know them I strain I think it's strange to hug someone the first time you meet them without knowing anything about them like I we shook hands and I will now hug you

35:46on the way out if I was like I was comfortable until you just use your hands as underwire open the door once my trailer is jerking off he was trying to get into your trailer he was I don't know what he was doing he was either being silly which is Andy or it was high as which is Andy yeah yeah well he was looking to me which is also Andy yeah different thing to me my my Steven and I like Steve is my boyfriend and we've met Andy we out and a bunch of little safe artists even like when you gonna leave your boyfriend and confront yourself something like really funny in front of Steven and I love it like I did funny dude yeah yes but he's he has no filter and he has no control and he wants to sometimes and like he'll go on like he did my podcast once he was talking about being sober he's like I'm sober now I'm really happy I go so you can stay sober because I

37:08don't know it was but it was also one of those things where you understand his mindset is not it like he he's embraced his life of control strange way instead of like trying to read formulate the way he views the parameters that he establishes what for him to have a healthy happy life because he was living in his ex-wife's shed he had a podcast called shed like that turn didn't know a comedy thing yeah turn turn your the shed show that's what he called it show his great did you also remember he had that reality TV show called the ass sistent which is to this day one of the funniest things I've ever seen that's right we physically went back in the days when people could you know just appreciate physical assault for what it was yeah let's go back to that time it's not the same with him because he's so crazy and you know what going in yeah but still if you're standing next to him

38:13then he just reaches over and grab your tit it's still wrong of course yeah anybody I have a love for him in my heart that I that part of who he is is like kind of like you never know what he's gonna do kind of thing to me I don't have it my head when I hang out with him like is he gonna solve me like I never I don't never think that but that's what I love about him is he's very unpredictable he's you know and he's super talented like I when you ever do scenes together I would have to redo the scene over and over again yeah yeah it's a real problem he's really talented yeah yeah when we met him he was sober so we kind of went into it knowing sober Andy Dick and we actually met him at I mean I think it's supposed to be called these days rehab facility it was a halfway house and we met him and he had just I reached out and to his agents assistant and he randomly agreed to do

39:03our podcast we've met him in the music room of his rehab facility and he told us the only reason that he agreed to do the podcast was because he learned in a a that as a as an alcoholic he's been really selfish wasted people's time hurt people and so he said yes to doing guys we because he was trying to make amends for all the bad he had done and I thought I just thought that was really nice like what a what a nice reason to do something right but he didn't bad to you guys it sounds more like you wanted to be on your podcast cuz it's popular no idea what it was this was a couple years ago I know you know he was it was caught it was a karma thing I mean yes we aren't the people he hurt but I think he was just trying to put good out into the universe and I really believed him that's normal like a year and a half two years ago Weiner it was a while ago yeah that makes sense yeah I

39:56mean he's he's definitely had these moments of clarity yeah yeah well it was funny when he got fired from this movie recently for licking somebody he said misconduct is my middle name care sometimes I think about like the way I have a monthly show that I run in New York City where my friend and I do open it up as characters Nina and Simone or like prostitutes and where we have a guy this guy will comes up and he intros us every month and as I'll smack his ass and I've been thinking lately I'm like probably shouldn't do that huh I did it I just I I was he didn't didn't mind or if he didn't tell me I mean I think my take on it is my take there's a difference between a girl doing it to a guy because a girl can't rape a guy this is physical advantage you could do anything sure if you drugged them but like smacking on the ass is very different yeah some women who are bigger

40:55than some men sure absolutely in the most part there's a difference between a girl doing something like that to a guy and that's the difference yeah cuz you're no feel for your life it's the physical threat yeah well I had a buddy of mine who was sexually harassed by his boss was a woman and he said it was super disturbing because he's kind of introverted and his his boss would grab his ass when he was like getting coffee go to the coffee machine and she'd grab his ass yeah joltin he was like really stunned and worried about being around her and she would tease him about him being a prude oh he said it really uncomfortable and he said now I know what it's like to be a woman and was joking around about it but yeah did he ever address it with her no I think he quit I wound up quitting yeah it was a situation where I was like you know he was he was below her in the the social food

41:46chain of the office yeah she could fire him and you know he wouldn't have any money and nobody would ever believe that she had done that to him there was no proof there was it was a weird sort of reversal of the dynamic and then that anxiety got created and his work environment I feel like women with women it's like little things happen throughout your life when you're a chick that just they're not they don't make you feel unsafe it's just like I just want to go to the goddamn grocery store can you not go to me I just don't and then that all adds up whether it's big things little things and usually it's a combination of both and then that adds up to the feeling unsafe this and then you hear stories and then you're like ah focus well the Cosmi thing freaked so many people out but I know a bunch of girls have been drugged I know a bunch of girls who have been at a bar and then

42:34how to drink that someone gave them then all sudden their legs start giving out no I've been roofied as far as roofie yes mm-hmm ended there though but yeah yeah because I I was somehow got my friends were with me it was that my own birthday party a cup when I was like 25 in that area 24 25 and I was pushed in my my friends pushed me in a cab because they just thought I was like blackout drunk but I really had been roofied that person since committed suicide yeah so I'm not the person who roofied you yeah I'm not mad I knew who it was I'm not I'm not mad about it people are like aren't you angry I'm like no that person had diamond so much bigger than me getting roofied and I'm so thankful that nothing happened to me like I feel honestly if that's what being a woman that when you get roofied and feel lucky you don't get raped I feel lucky and that's being a woman mmm

43:24yeah it's weird to feel lucky that I've never been raped it is we're really lucky we hear about it I mean now the public is hearing about it how often happens in Hollywood which a lot of us already knew but it happens in every economic status every class of people every eighth it happens so much I mean we it's to the point where a couple times on our podcast I've said statistically there has to be rapists listening to us somebody listening to us has has raped somebody I'm sure so sick of hearing of but what I hear from the victims all goddamn day and I it doesn't help me get to the bottom of why this is happening and so I'm like if you're typist make a fake email and email us cuz I help me understand this cuz I think about it all the times we are constantly getting really horrible heartbreaking emails about it and we've had a couple guys email us one guy was

44:14he said he was really sick and tired of seeing other men be douchebags two women lie to women and then they get laid and by the time he turned 30 he said he broke and he started putting ads out on Craigslist and then would rape the women and he still does it but I'm like the problem there is you felt entitled to a woman okay because he was acting like an that has nothing to do with you so I think that entitlement thing is is an important building block in what why people do this well people start the one thing that does happen and I've seen with men as they get older they start to associate women with pain because they get rejected mmm because they and they get on and they get rejected and they get angry and then there's this antagonistic relationship between women and them they look at women as the enemy and then they look at women as the cause of emotional pain and then they start to

45:06insult them and say nasty to them I've seen and I've seen it happen with guys where they you know they start off kind of like carefree and then as they get into their 30s and then they start getting more shitty and then they see the arc I've seen the arc yeah are they your friends no okay if you've ever talked to them about that because one thing I think would help is if dudes were like hey don't don't do that well one of the reason why I'm not friends with it one guy in particular is because of a extreme lack of awareness that became more and more apparent as he got older what you couldn't talk to him about things mmm if you can't talk to some of about things if they're doing something wrong then they're not gonna ever learn and if they're not gonna ever learn and grow you're always gonna have this weird blockade whenever you talked I hate that yeah you can't talk to those people

45:47about one of them because that's what that's he should learn like hopefully if you lose if his friends continue to do that and he's like wait why the word everybody goes people have deep seeded trenches these these defense mechanisms that they just fall right into every time and it's almost like they can't stay on the edges yeah and whatever for whatever psychological reason I mean I'm not a psychologist I don't know what's causing it but there's there's a lot of men that I think as time goes on and they get maybe they're not attractive maybe they're not successful maybe it's both but as time goes on they get more and more resentful and angry about women yeah sometimes man we meet men that are you know and it's not often but you meet them and you're like you hate women do you hate women and a lot of times I've been doing this lately when we get like

46:33shitty things said to us on Twitter I'll respond back with like you know with a really nice thing to say like a compliment and then he'll it'll like break them down and be like Oh whose brief oh I'm like okay you know and it's because to me when I see a man do that when they do it to me personally it's hard not to take it personal but that's it's not a personal thing they're projecting to they do that to me all the time and they're yeah because they just want to get a reaction one of the best ways to get a reaction down to use and make you feel bad yeah that's true if they say something nice to you you don't respond you know and then I just what when guys get to you like what what are this flash I try to say mean things or whatever you know there's always someone who's trying to push a button yes yeah I mean but why do they do that this is the only reason because they're

47:32losers there's no one is like a happy fulfilled person who hates on Twitter you're not doing anything with your life that's I I mean maybe you have like I'm gonna dedicate five minutes a day to be in a con I'm just gonna go online on the on people time and after cut times over I'm gonna just go water the garden I can't affect people need to squeeze in some I'm in their day I really think or I got a bad idea like the social media version of a rage room where it's not really hurting anybody and no it's no one's actual dishes you're breaking someone who's bought in a thrift store and then you can let it out and then you can let you're punching back because Jon Ronson is one of the smartest people we've ever had the honor of talking he's my super crime and he's like we gonna stop making people or plaything or what was the quote weak people or playthings or play toys I don't know

48:29instinct yeah evolution exists in chickens you know I gotta have chickens and one things you always hear about chickens is the thing called the pecking order that is real as and we have a big chicken coop we have 22 chickens and one things that happens is the chickens will find the smallest chicken they that chicken up oh my gosh and the other chickens will pile on and they'll chase the chicken around and peck it for no reason the chickens for anything it's just a smallest chicken does the chicken die sometimes sometimes chickens died and the other ones will peck at the hole oh my god try to eat it dogs and dogs it exists there's the Alpha and then there's the betas yeah wolf packs it exists I mean it's just a normal thing about nature where when humans see someone who's weak you have to work very hard to resist the urge to go but get the out of here here right get your together stop

49:26crying like that that instinct to be cruel to someone who's weak is like genetically predisposed in people it's a part of what made the genes of the stronger people keep moving yes that were weak and they couldn't handle emotional stress and then they were shunned I mean they were pushed out of the community but we're finding now with this new society of Italy when we live in where people are able to gather information and communicate and do things that don't even involve like person-to-person contact is that these people who are introverts and these people that are shy and maybe even like socially awkward or have a huge problem with confrontation and you would consider them weak they have a type of creativity that doesn't exist in the Alfa's they have a type of creativity and they have a perspective and maybe an introspective way of approaching things

50:17that is super valuable to like computer coding now you need to a lot of other things that you would normally think of as being not even normally think of it as think they're there alternative methods of thinking you would perceive that an outgoing person would perceive that as we do you an idiot or some people they don't exist in the normal paradigm like the look if you look at human societies up until like the last couple hundred years you're dealing with people that have these hard working jobs there's a few artists musicians and painters and things along those lines but most of what you're doing if you're not a craftsperson hard labor who very difficult jobs there's no computer coding there's no there's no that there's so many of these alternative positions as far as like the way the human mind works that we're never available there's someone who lived

51:05three four five hundred years ago so we're finding value we're finding value in different kinds of thinking in people with different people that are on the spectrum Asperger's and all the smartest well they have a different sort of intelligence and we're looking at them as if there's something wrong with them because they don't they don't interact with people in the same way as most people do emotionally and sometimes they have like a real difficult finding difficult time finding emotional and social bonds with people but when it comes to numbers when it comes to a lot of other things some of these people not all of them but some of them excel at those things in a way that a lot of people can't aren't even capable of yeah that's one of the things they say about people in Silicon Valley that work in a lot of a lot of these jobs that involve computer coding and programming and

51:52things along my arms you have a giant percentage of the people that are on the spectrum joining I get it might be like 90 my son works there but he's he's not he is much much much more social than me you're not interacting with your people a lot in that job yes that makes sense that your bollocks out with that yeah and you know I think we we have to realize that this is that like if it was for you of the three of us there would be no cell phones since we were on a deserted island and sure that you could live forever or the three of us we live forever fire yeah and we'd show you how to kill animals and maybe you guys could show me some emotional intelligence yeah yeah we could talk about working on feelings I could make you a beautiful like a mask for your face you'd have great skin oh yeah I think the the urge to be cruel to someone who's weaker than you has to be

52:43resisted in in any sort of a comfortable society and that's reinforced enough that should be on a bumper sticker that I thought you were going with us I thought you were to be like people who call you know people out in articles in Jezebel and broadly are really meek when you meet him in person that's that's a good point I was like that's not at all where he's going with this no I think that's also true though it is kind of true in a lot of ways but I think even what they're doing like I don't want to mention anybody particular this one particular feminist writer that I know who like will attack and go after women she's like severely depressed and sad I heard she's she's overweight and she's unhappy and unhealthy oh it's a she aware of that whether or not she revels in that awareness right but that's more these people that are calling people out look there's people that are calling

53:43people out that are doing a world of service because they're exposing real problematic behavior that I don't expect like look what I was talking about my friend who got sexually harassed by a woman I don't experience that okay I don't have a job where I have a boss who's a woman you know but if I was a woman and I had a boss who was a man who's trying to me all the time it would be hell yeah you know what if you you know you're worried you have to be a certain amount of flirtatious with this guy a certain level so that you can maintain your position or maybe even like get a job you know a better job or promotion I mean this that's some real yeah I mean it's also placed though to into like even an ink on me like when Kurt and I started comedy I'm like okay I'm gonna I first made friends with older male comics because it was easier because I had it's not that we wanted to

54:28each other but I at least had some currency in the flirting like there was currency in that like no I can be friendly with them and they would enjoy that and they would talk to you yeah you just need to find people who are willing to give you the time of day and a lot of times like it's because I want to look at you so you're just like but it's in a way that's not creepy they don't cross a line it's just it's just like we got our full 40 and that's okay you're just using each other they're using you to feel good and young and sexual and you're using them to get comedy protip yeah and none of us are being to each other I mean obviously we're talking about a bunch of different exchanges but it doesn't always have to be negative yeah you could just be friendly with each other yeah you know like I the last time I dated a female comedian we were both 21 you know and it was when I was in

55:13Boston I was like this terrible idea sounds like a crazy meeting of a bad Rock doesn't yeah it doesn't work but I think one of the things that happen we can work well Tom christina pazsitzky looks super happy yeah they're both really funny Bonnie and red emotion they are a great couple three that's a good one as well sometimes it works sometimes it works look I hate absolutes right yeah never do this or never do that unless you're saying like never eat babies right that's a good absolute no but like also too with the flirting thing I'm more comfortable there's a time where I look back on like I don't know friends with any big female comedians it's only male because I feel more comfortable going off to the male because I feel like there's something of like I have something to offer only it's only flirting that's it we're not gonna dive never I've had been in a

56:14relationship as long as I've been doing stand-up so but if not I would have probably a lot of comics but better this way you know and probably now for sure but when I think of good but you know in the past book a great open mic yeah good but going up to a female comic I'm like what do I have to why would she want to talk to me cuz you're a human why would your like the yeah but I mean I I've been doing stand-up for a long time I've always had men friends that are men friends and and men and women friends that are chemi yes friends that are female friends that are comedians a lot that are on our same level that started in the same time as us but like you know a pro I remember when I asked brawny McFarlane do the podcast I was really nervous to approach her she was super sweet and she was like yeah she's so supportive of other women reeds was really champion champion like

57:16women aren't funny her documentary yeah really and really like wrong yeah yeah opened up about a lot of yeah I surprised no I've known Bonnie forever we still the same manager oh really she's I was like was in mind or some like that long last time ago yeah she's awesome but it's it's a different animal when when you're a woman you know and I think that's one of the things that Eliza brought up when she was talking about this whole louis c.k thing she was talking about how some men especially when she first started would treat her because she was just starting out she wasn't very good yet you know she was and someone who is established and is better and really has like their careers cooking they will look at you like you are a lesser thing than them they don't look at you like a peer and i try to tell this to as many young comics as i can um that is incredibly important

58:12that we look at all of us all of us that are doing this thing as the same thing yeah somebody might be doing it for three days and someone might be doing it for 30 years but we're all doing the same thing we're all together yeah so like doorman like i'm super friendly with everybody who works the Comedy Store is a great example that because everybody who works there is a comic yeah people who are the the security or comics a lot of people that were managers were comics some people bartenders are comics I know like a lot of the people like Josh Martin and punky there they're comics they even paid regulars and they still work the ball oh wow that's cool so there's a like an intense community there love the comic store it's amazing and then you never get a place where you have a pro shows every night and an indie show upstairs and that never there's no place

58:57in New York that has won multiple rooms like that a couple do but their net the quality of the spectrum of comedians in terms of experience is is so vast any night of the week there and it's so cool and its really support is a super support and people that are not supportive they get pushed out and I love that I think the comedy community in New York too is very supportive very we do bet we give each other tags when when we think of good and it's we just we we talk about comedy we live and breathe it and we nerd out on in the green rooms and we really are supportive and and yeah I like it it's awesome don't you guys think that now it's easier to do that too because it's not like everyone's competing for a very small amount of spots like it used to be like there was only so many spots on a sitcom there's only so many spots to host a late-night show and everybody was

59:46like hyper competitive yeah now you can make your own opportunity I mean there's some examples of it guys we one of them I'm broad city I love the story of broad city Abbi and Ilana couldn't get on house teams they just kept getting rejected from house teams at UCB they were they started working on this web series together it blew up I mean the quality of the webseries before I made it to air is phenomenal they just put a lot of hard work into it and they said we're not gonna take no for an answer and if this community that we've worked in so long is saying no we're gonna do it on our own and they did you can do that and also one of the things is that like podcasters and people that do things online they support other people that do things online like you never see someone from a show on CBS getting promoted from a show on NBC great super rare yeah but in the world

60:30of podcasting it's super common yeah everybody has everybody on their shows and we always talk everybody up and hey go see she's playing here and he's playing there and you promote their dates and it's a it's a way more egalitarian way more like supportive community and it's a win-win for everybody because it feels good to be supportive of people you respect and admired who are talented and you know and it to that's why I left stand up because you're the only one who's gonna do your act yes so don't worry about Ocoee but but yeah I mean there's only one you and the people that are shitty to other comedians they get I mean if you're a comic you have any comedian friends that's oh it's a giant problem you can think of a lot of I know some famous ones that come to the store and the the door people get super bummed out they just look past them they don't say

61:25hi to them they'll go straight to bill burr or straight to someone famous yeah I know we talked to them and they don't talk to regular folks I feel like - but I've had interactions with famous comics like the first one the person was being a dick and just like looking down and and I was being introduced by his friend and he was like hey how you doing it had sunglasses and doors I'm like you're doing all of you give me a name they rhyme with within the second time we met him it's um couldn't have been nicer sweets going through some weird exactly and someone run into someone like at the wrong time although he was going through some while showing pictures of himself to another person is that how you act out sometimes if there's a bad day you're like just go right to naked photos yeah baby yeah oh my do you take nudes no why not thinking of doing it now really but just of like

62:30a close up your butthole mmm no let's redefine the nude yeah good do you do have you ever taken one I don't need to see it I'm sure of taking pictures of it okay really just because it's cuz you have a camera pictures of my I've never taken a picture of my check if you have a weird feeling down there just make sure everything seats your own doctor if I was a girl I would definitely take pictures so I would really know what it looks like because otherwise you can't really see it just go up squat or a mirror yeah oh Jesus yes you got to be a contortionist see my own from here yeah but you can't because we were discussed that you've seen the lab yeah well is the whole thing right would be the whole thing I would say that vaginas just the hole that we're most concerned about the is the house but the vagina is like the living room oh I think so okay yeah you could be wrong he could be

63:37right and I also don't know which one it is you know that's why we're relatable were you when you started like being sexually active when you were younger were you like a vagina how do i what do I even what do I do because I kind of feel like men going into straight and by men that are gonna be having sex with women like s gotta be confusing cuz the dick it's like with the dick yeah you already have one but also like a woman is a woman who doesn't have a dick I feel like I know what to do with it a little well guys share information with each other the girls share information about what to do with dicks yeah I didn't share it information ever sure oh because we've heard a lot guys like don't talk about it and like why not you missing out on some tips start talking about like what do you do being fingered at 14 is a worst it's just like ringing a doorbell inside clean yeah and

64:38there is no doorbell but they don't know that we tend oh yeah yeah yeah sucked well jackhammer fingers man it's got to be better now than when we were young and it's got to be better when we were young then when our parents were young that is very true it's all and don't think that's the same thing I mean I think that's with everything I think one of the things that's going on right now and one of the things with all this sexual assault stuff that's making the news is that we're we're in the middle of a giant social change I feel that too it's like a hurricane around us and bathtubs and cows are flying through the air and trucks up there we're in the middle of it and I think a lot of times you don't realize how much change is actually taking place but if you just try to look at comedy from the 1980s and look at comedy from now like what you can get away with then and what

65:31you like go watch Eddie Murphy raw yeah and you would never do that today no I like a lot of them had like a lot homophobic but you know Andrew Dice Clay would never fly today maybe character mmm I don't I don't know that would work yeah I used to be Andrew silverstein you know Andrew silverstein was he would do straight stand-up and then he had a of characters he would do and one of the characters do was the dice man do these Nursery Rhymes yes mary had a little lamb yourself yeah yeah and that and then he became the dice man it's like uncomfortable to be that guy all the time yeah that's true that makes sense it's comfortable being a character I'm not my stage my bits are very well there's a lot of people that have done that and they got trapped like emo Philips got trapped hi I yes I just watched a documentary of dying laughing anything was called and he was on one

66:31yeah and I'm like wait is he like that or no I don't tell no he's not like that cuz I saw him when he stopped doing that he stopped doing that for a while and then he went back to it oh I'm Kat Gould wait talk to me about it like you talked about it on the podcast it was really hard for him to stop doing it yeah cuz everybody's like hey man Bobcat thing he's like hey you yeah I'm just a person to do my stand-up I was like for a long time it was like really hard oh that would piss me off yeah because everybody wanted to go yeah yeah the longest time mmm and he just got older and it was like what the am i doing I'm oops and it was really funny when it he's younger yeah it worked from then they just didn't want to do it anymore but if you have that character like if you're in a character all the time you get stuck yeah yeah yeah everybody hurt to perform I never feel like yourself yeah

67:18that's what I like about it that's why the rejection stings that much more because like you're rejecting my soul yeah you're presenting yeah then you really got to take a second and think I think for sure this is a tumultuous time of change and I think ultimately it's gonna be very good but I think I got some weird ideas on it though I really think that one of the things that holds us up is the ability to lie and I think the that is not forever I think the ability to lie like I think I I believe that we are I don't know how many years away whether it's 10 or 20 we're 20 whatever it is years away of some rosetta stone of human interaction that takes place electronically I think they're going to figure out some way where we can teach children a language that's a universal language that's transmitted through Peters or through some sort of a human internet interface some sort of a neural

68:15interface that they're they're working on hundreds of different versions right now well they're they can already send thoughts back and forth to people from the internet they can send images to other people's minds one person could send an image of a triangle to your mind through they can currently do that current how they do it through some sort of electrical stimulation of various parts of the brain where you send a signal and that signal through your thoughts of this object like you have this idea like say if you think of a bottle of what like well something really a triangle let's go back to that shape it's a very obvious symbol right you know what it looks like I know what it looks like and if I can think of that there is a pattern in my brain that I can transmit to you through this very rudimentary technology so I I liken it to like a Morse code machine

69:02what they used to be able to communicate with those as good as you get now obviously you take a video on your phone you send it someone New Zealand right we're in a different world and it's not that far away I mean you're talking about just a couple hundred years we've gone from the Morse code to sending a video to New Zealand in real time well have you heard of a Fisher Wallace sim simulator I've heard of that so my mom has had depression most of her life and she was has been on 25 different meds that made her worse and a doctor prescribed a Fisher Wallace stimulator it's just a little tiny machine with two pads they're sponges you wet the sponges a little bit you put him on your temples and she did it twice a day for about 20 minutes and her depression went away and I felt felt like I got my mom like a you know cuz she just the meds would just make her so numb and like emotionless and

69:54that would depress her and she in like I just lived my whole life I've been seeing her do these peaks and valleys and the Fisher Wallace stimulator there's no side effects if anything she gets a headache but there's no mental side effects and and her it's insane how often does she have to do she does it twice a day the only thing that I've noticed I guess it is a side effect it what makes her a little bit hyper and it's not hungry that are already happy what if it'll make you ecstatic I don't know but that's what I was wondering like maca bar laughs you slapped that on when you get on that Japanese toilet and get hot water pumping up your clam Oh like a MOLLE machine Wow put those babies on yeah I had a fan gave us a cookie in San Fran and it was labeled you know but I didn't know how much hate we had to go to plane so I'm like I gotta throw this out um it

71:00was like at the end of a two-week tour we're doing two shows and I was so tired I'm like I don't want to get held up on the plane so I took a little chunk I ate it and then it kicked in when we were at the gate and Krim was like I'm gonna go get Starbucks you want anything like that fine and then all of a sudden I'm like no I'm not fine and I texted cram like you're gonna hate me but oh I'm gonna die soon and this is not okay and then I just started having a panic attack it was already someone who's not gonna fly no yeah I would have panic attacks all the time and then there's like I was bawling my eyes on this little girl came up like two feet in front of me and she was like and she just tilted her head and stared at me am i career-wise that's weird yeah I thought I was gonna die I that's the only time in my life I ever remember having the feeling of like

71:45you're about to die I gave a 10-9 little girl just came over like a normal little girl and then when Christina said why is this little girl looking at me I said probably cuz she's never seen a grown woman have a tantrum in an airport sorry tantrum and then I'll get on that plane man I thought was kicked off that plane she was dead I think in 2017 like saying she's not I was like she's not good at flying like that that doesn't fly anymore and the lady was like does she need to get off and I was like no she's fine she's gonna be fine we're gonna get through this and we're gonna get that car how far how far was the flight oh is from San Fran to New York right yeah no it's all across country and did you sober up mmm an hour after I got home to my apartment a blanket over her and I was like yeah I was like it was it was well you wrote the row the storm I did and I survived

72:41god yeah but yeah the edibles me up well they're just too goddamn strong especially if you just try to eat a whole cookie that could have been hundreds of milligrams why just took a little chunk of it it was a big-ass cookie and I took a quarter of it but then yeah I mean drugs third quarter but that's why I'm scared like kirinda psychedelics I I feel like if you have anxiety I haven't got a lot of anxiety probably not for me it's a different thing because the anxiety that you get from edible marijuana is very peculiar it's intensely introspective mmm I don't love edibles either I much prefer mushrooms acid I did DMT recently I studied using partially using your documentary so thank you yeah delicious thank you it was very important cuz that's scary you need to study yeah it's nothing not something you should take frivolous no absolutely not I studied for I had it sitting on my table

73:32and I studied for like a good two months watched a lot of stuff on the internet read a lot about it talk to people who had done it what's crazy is a natural part of human neural chemistry that exists that your brain is making that stuff all the time and you can just extract it from a thousand different plants and then you take it smoke it and then you meet Jesus and aliens and everything have you met Jesus meet everything you need things that are changing so whatever the they were a second ago they're not the same thing a second later yeah it's pretty intense is that why you're such a curious person and you really try it has has psychedelics made you because some people it really makes a positive shift in their consciousness and their curiosity I've seen it happen and sometimes it goes the other way but I'm is that where were you always our conference always curious but it made my

74:21curiosity it confirmed the need for it like that if you do when you do something like DMT it is so profoundly bizarre that after it's over you are so stunned at how few people know about this and how you didn't know about until that happened and how you'll never be the same again oh you'll never be the same again no Ryu's you're never going to be the same again because you know that's real you know that you could through this chemical portal to what's essentially another dimension I mean it sounds like another dimension where you're you are interacting with ideas that seem to be sent in they seem to be alive you're you're you're you're being inundated with thoughts and words that come at you without like a physical presence like no one's saying a word but you like if I said to you hey let's get a cup of coffee like that signal goes into your brain because that you're

75:15hearing my words you interpret them you get the same thing from these DMT States but you don't actually hear the words but you know what the words are titanically bizarre have you ever seen a heel like a psychic healer of you her her psychic surgery believe so I okay I don't like I never really talked about this cuz I don't I don't need people I'm not trying to convert anybody to believe in this but I've had psychic surgery once and I and my mom and I had so he this guy his name was dr. V and he did I did have my shirt off the vet wake up I was conscious the whole time but I like my mom had breast tissue that was really hard in her breast cuz she had all these surgeries for to get little tumors removed they weren't cancerous and it really hurt or like if you touched her boob like it would hurt and he okay so this doctor hmm he used to work for NASA and he's Russian and he

76:19he's very mysterious you looked into his background I tried to google but I didn't have I didn't have it didn't seem legit we're going to new a tiny little apartment and this old lady was answering and she was like come in and I'm like but uh but he did he didn't touch her and he just he kept moving his hands like this and he would he would do this like I was trying to get warm and then he would flick it and then he would he would circle around her boob and then pull out like an imaginary thing and it was gone the heart tissue was gone it's the weirdest thing and he did it to me with my knee it was the weirdest thing and I mean it's like seeing a ghost like you you don't you're like I mean that just how and that's undeniable well if you believe in it your body can produce some pretty incredible results and that's what the power of suggestion is what placebo effect is placebo effects 100%

77:12real totally but I didn't even know that psychic surgery was a thing before he actually did it I had no he's not doing anything he's just getting you convinced that he's doing something and by him being convincing you that he's doing something you feel some sort of a positive response because your body reacts is if he's done something to you that's a service in and of itself taken is it is a service in and of itself but it's also deceptive there's a weird thing that people do like where they you know there's a lot of weird healers or they do like Reiki and all this different I am there's no science bonnet it's not it's not real but if you think that it's doing something to you you can feel better your feelings on acupuncture I don't know I've had it but the guy was a quack okay it doesn't mean that it's not real that's I'm I'm very skeptical but I was working in ass but I

77:59was nice like a receptionist at a spa was my day job while pursuing comedy and there was an acupuncturist there and I was like let me try it really I was in a really deep depression and like the mind-body connection I gotta say she and Jesus she's an MD she's not just the person off the street this woman's an MD young woman and it changed my life and I hate to even say that I'm embarrassed to even be like I have an acupuncture it seems so happy different mind-body connection is a misnomer right because your mind is a part of your body I mean it's all one thing that's why one of the things with people bodies yeah but if you don't have a healthy body your minds not gonna function at its best yeah you could be a brilliant person with an unhealthy body yeah but you will be better if you your body functions well it's not giving you Trump problems it's not causing you

78:47issues yeah it's not a like source of stress and concern and I think that what these people can do or there's a lot of different things that are not supported whatsoever by science and a lot of people that are very scientifically minded they they they shun those things and they think those things have zero benefit and they also put religion in that group as well and I think they're very similar in that if you believe in certain things like there was a the article recently by Robert Sapolsky who is a he's out of Stan he's a professor Stanford University and we had him on the podcast we talked about about primates and he's a really really fascinating guy he's got some amazing studies that he's done on baboons and primate behavior but one of the things he was talking about is the stress relieving aspect of an actual religious belief so you could say that if you

79:40really do believe that everything is going to be fine because God's looking out for you that just that alone whether or not it's real or scientifically verifiable that proof is not necessary for you to feel good yeah I mean I choose to be a positive person because that's my survival mechanism I wouldn't have made it through life without being positive positive is one thing but an actual belief that something is happening to your body that's not scientifically possible like that someone can rub their hands right now I feel the bad juju out of your yeah yeah but if you believe that though just the belief in that can trigger can make a lot of like human neural chemistry that literally will make you feel better that's true I can now after that experience that was a couple years ago I can if I like lay on my bed and meditate I don't really do that cuz I'm on time

80:25but I can if I think really hard I can make certain parts of my body like have those pins and needle feeling mm-hmm which I was like that's all you should make the time you probably do that's kind of cool yeah but it's weird like people worry about like the discipline of doing something like that that it gets them concerned I gotta have time for that and that's turned off because this something there's a weird way that what human beings are programmed that we we avoid certain types of strenuous activity avoid getting up early when you know you should there's a lot of things we do where we go towards comfort and away from these uncomfortable feelings and some of those uncomfortable feelings are just sitting alone meditating just sitting alone concentrating on your breath for 20 minutes a day yeah yeah big benefits to that yeah and then you get down on yourself and then that

81:13stress then you're like when you're in your room all day you're like that then you go on the internet and you're saying your room for another week and then you read some bad comments these what that's the key to life not really you give a about the comment oh I don't read them very rarely will like glance through look really quickly but if I do it once a day it's rare oh yeah well sometimes I want to get pissed off and then sometimes we just make fun of it cuz it's so whole it's hilarious we've had like men's rights activists write articles about us like calling us dumpsters I love it I didn't know that I didn't know the phrase dumpster right how did you make it to this part of life I don't know first sentence in our book is are you a degenerate dumpster and worthy of love and affection is that what somebody called you if he said that that would have made it even better because then

82:10you would know like how broken a person is yeah it was fine but that kind of like to me that's the best feeling of like taking control the situation by reading it and then roasting them was humor intelligence is far greater than insulting people you guys don't say mean about men I mean you're you're pretty honest yeah but you're not you're not negative you're not like you're not like anti men women you mean you you you rightly call that they've done that's up yeah you you guys aren't we love minute the show is called guys we kicked in the dick podcast our definition of feminism is women can be pieces of too yeah it is and I think that for men I think it's a good thing to be able to listen to women talk unfiltered and I don't think and guys avoid that like girl we're here with these of to say like listen you know and they're not saying that you should listen because

83:17you have to agree with them but you will gain a more of an understanding of how someone who is very different than you views may be the exact same interaction and just that just that one look at another perspective might make you sit back no okay maybe I need to look at it from their point of view oh it's the best my favorite email is when a guy emails he's like I gotta be honest I was in your podcast I was expecting like jerk-off and but I actually learned something I'm like bless you I love like that's the best when you when you when you surprise somebody I think is in the name of the podcast is people are gonna either go that's hilarious or that's discussing or what or be whatever the reaction is they're gonna check it out they're gonna remember they're surprised by what they hear because it's not what they expected it sticks it's stronger do you guys feel like the podcast has

84:10helped you understand yourselves and grow better yes yeah I mean that we had no choice but to grow when you when you're sitting down with people who you've had these intimate relationships both emotional and sexual with it's just like holding a mirror up to yourself and that was the concept the concept was kind of to do this podcast much like John Cusack and high-fidelity and just learn about yourself through these people can imagine human Yelp reviews well do you think you also learn about yourself from conversations where you're not looking at your phone you're not checking the internet you're not watching television just sitting there for hours communicating with each other and that's a lost art it is and I we forget that the microphones are on we forget that we're talking all the time well one of the things that's changed for me is I settled a podcast with that

84:56and that was the first time I ever said out loud I was like I really want to see my boyfriend another woman I just want to like masturbate to it and then Stephen and must have been like yeah well he edits the podcast and he's like hey you want to uh what tell me something I was like what the three-way thing you want to see me I'm like oh yeah and then we've had three ways and it's brought us closer and it's so hot so I have a cuckold effete assure I didn't realize I had shackled and that's what you type into pornhub but it's like really just because it's a chick but it's Queen Q you EAN it's just like me it just sounds like qu e CU c k qu EI n is ween Queen cuz I was looking at cuckold and I'm like why the can I get and I'm like dude soul Foreman and then dude email me is like just typing cut Queen and it's fine like okay the hole thing though is like guys that are like

85:59you emasculated like some big black dude comes in with a giant yeah yeah those wife and you cry in the corner on a knee jerk that is your Lube yeah your tears and then one of them was like at the end of it that guy came in the other guy's mouth and I was like wow that took another that's another category it wasn't in it in the first place it was all strictly for research right with that poor guy that just sits there and pretends I mean I guess it's a guy who wanted to suck a dick and they brought him in they gave me a script but I mean the the the thing that they're projecting like this this vision of like this poor guy who's with this hot girl and he can't control her and he can't satisfy her but they're together and then the big black guy comes over to sit the in the corner and watch me your woman okay well were you researching I don't like people that are do you watch a lot of porn

87:17not a lot what's that to you what's not a lot like once or twice a week yeah I think porn is like anything else you can get obsessed with it I think people get obsessed with all sorts of things and their porn gives you a stimulation right and that stimulation is you're watching two people sexually interact with each other and you can pretend you're there you can pretend you're doing it whatever weird stimulation it is that that like weird thing that you're doing people will numb themselves with that if they have too much stress if there's too much going on there live and it becomes almost like a drug yep and then after you're done jerking off and you come you're like well why was I even doing this what I'm gonna go eat cake and it's just aniss that can happen too I was liking see I feel pretty good after but I don't consume a ton of porn yeah I was getting

88:03too much I was like you know what I'm gonna try masturbating into my mind and it's a lot more work but it's more rewarding I love masturbating time my imagination I should I gotta start masturbating natural people yeah you know truck drivers what were you using if you are using real people were you like creating creating beings in your mind yeah the sims in my head you know no just imagining my boyfriend somebody else Oh like a real hot chick I always think so hot other people and normally not my boy right you know I've never allow my brain to like let's masturbate to like that neighbor guy that we had our Airbnb goddamn and I did masturbate to him and it was really fun because it's like you can go there in your head and he doesn't know that so it's cool you didn't hurt him you didn't hurt your boyfriend yeah I didn't hurt anybody it doesn't seem the same as if you found

89:00out that a guy that you know was jerking off to you I just don't want to find out but if you're doing it that's okay because they should DM you and tell you like so many men do it's like you keep that to yourself I don't mind if people jerk off to me but I should never know but we agree there's a difference between a girl saying that she plays with herself to you versus a guy that he plays with him or a girl a girl sang it to a guy is different than a guy saying it to a girl if a guy came up to me he's like I jerked off to you and once I'm like no I don't know I mean excited it depends on how much swaggy head you were attracted to probably I mean and that's and that's this thing that we like to pretend that's not true but right up he was oh my god if he was like this hot sexy guide he told me that I would like that article toilet for a little bit before

89:46we started the podcast with it was that women and straw and gay men are more attracted to good-looking muscular men which shows that we're not making any progress with sexual gender stereotypes like no not really and that was like news week it's the same with this space go to the safest space which is my favorite one of my favorite Twitter pages because they will read through the most ridiculous social justice warriors men with muscles and money are more attractive to straight women and gay men showing gender roles aren't progressing it's in tech and science first of all that's not that's not science that is goddamn nonsense is that by a male Sydney or female Sydney I need to know that it matters not showing gender roles aren't progressing what hot stays hot stupid yeah it's like if you use a lighter and you burn your skin it stays hot yeah that's we're not progressing in

90:49our ability to diffuse fire no your skin but the funny thing like I don't like I mean success to me I like it because that means you're driven and you don't sit on your ass all day no one wants to a lazy person I mean if you do that's your own thing but but also muscles nana like them you don't like I said I was like I wasn't surveyed for that yeah neither was i I'm like I mean I'm not like goof but you know I'm more attracted to somebody who truly like comedian like funny when you're funny that is so much hotter to me you could be overweight you could be underweight you could be whatever when you're funny that's the funny and hard work why isn't that the thing about what is attractive is that everybody's got their own little thing yeah there's there's some pretty standard things but their teeth yeah I love nice eyebrow no left or right in a bunch of different

91:36weird ways and that's kind of one of the cool things about being a person you know I know some women that are into like really skinny guys like super skinny like ribs same I know that heroin look some girls think that's hot I can see that being high my boyfriend was always I gonna get skinny like Iggy Pop I'm like no sex then see I like oysters that's my like a guy with like a legit gut that's like the I mean a Dave Matthews that people love that and if Dave Matthews watch that Matthews is a gun he has a little belly yeah and if he doesn't have that belly less hot have you ever been attracted to somebody mean you feel uncomfortable you say you're attracted to them cuz it's just not your type you think so care of his body working now and we're like we like it out by weird stuff like the skinny one the skinny ones weird because that's like an unhealthy thing

92:36yeah like if you're looking at someone and they look like you know like that Iggy Pop look is like boy he doesn't look healthy I could break you I don't know I'm still using drugs and still skinny but it just kinda I think it maybe other stays with you I like a guy that's bigger than me though like physically bigger than me yes I like that because homie exactly there's Iggy looks pretty good actually he's got some muscles that's it old man 260 years old they're damned real no yeah that's him young okay that's a little hotter men get so much hotter as they get older we're so weird I do think though there's some women though that just soar so we went to this summit that was like a lot of females it was just female speakers but like women of the Year summit yeah like chicks do rat right and this woman Sheila Nevins who's the head of documentaries at HBO I've never heard of her

93:35she is the sexiest woman I've ever seen she hurt her style and her confidence is she's very graceful but then she's like just cuz you're a woman doesn't mean you're good at and like she just is very she has this realest thickness to her though I'm like you're so sexy yeah I don't give a admits the only a woman over 50 can have but in a way that because I think sometimes young women use like I don't get a but like you give so my Fox right and there's when you when you truly don't give a you don't need to and now it's like the person posts the most pictures of the relationship is in the one in the worst relationship yeah when you got to say it it's sort of like really depressing strippers always have Instagram pages that have a lot of like inspirational quotes okay memes a lot of means a lot of it so just depressed at strip clubs like I really can't handle I love strip clubs I love

94:28hot chick dancing on me with her titties in my face I just want to cry every time except our sense of humor that's what it is we like laughing at dark like like laughing at something that's real up is the best feeling ever to me it's the same relationship I had with my brother were we're polar opposites except we share a sense of humor and I love that he one of my favorite people in the whole world yeah I mean you don't have to be the same no and it's nice to see like I think a lot of people like seeing two women that like just to disagree on a lot of but it's that doesn't mean I don't like her yeah that's a problem too is that people get so married to ideas that you don't like people who don't think the same way that you do which seems to me to be kind of crazy that is a dumb thing that's a dumb way right now it's really rampant right identity politics and this idea that

95:19like be on one team or the other you just dig your heels in and fight the other side with tooth claw now yeah we see that strongly in politics right it's a gigantic issue in politics politics is exhausting but you can't people can't live in the opposites like you can be both think you can be a great comedian and you could also sexually it's all people like you could be kind of there but you're still a good that doesn't don't you think that the clue you seek a thing was extra disturbing because he was doing it to one of us yeah wasn't he wasn't just doing it he wasn't just saying hey girl stay still or jerk off from Friday which is gross but he's also doing it too well should be appear exactly and that's what's one indicates to me it's a power dynamic and it's a you could have had a sex work you could have jumped off a sex worker would have been thrilled to take

96:04your money and you could do a scenario where you blocked the door and you jerk off and she's like but that's a consensual thing that's why that indicates the meets of a power struggle yeah because that consensual thing doesn't give you the buzz right yeah but like that also says to me though that he Louie is so intelligent that he did think it through a little bit more than he's letting on because it's like you know they're gonna have to keep this secret because we're all in this club together so if you do it to a young comedian that thing you don't know about that there's a certain thing about stand-ups I think everybody will agree were impulsive yep stand-ups are impulsive people it's one of the reasons you'll say the funny thing before everybody you know some people might even not even entertain the thought you opened the door and then blurt it out

96:48quicker than everybody else it's there's an impersonal aspect there so you think that could be an impulse no I think that he's an impulsive guy I think most comics are and there's a wild thrill to that impulse the problem is you're also doing it to a person that doesn't want you to do it to them yeah and even if you know there's no physical contact you're making them watch you beat off which is up yeah you know the whole TIG Notaro thing would take Notaro thinks that he started helping her to show that he was a nice guy yes like a lesbian a feminist and like he's gonna promote her thing and this is like take some of the weight off of him right she said that she felt burdened by her relationship with him because she believes that he did it on purpose and he made a conscious decision it could be I don't know yeah it could be too you know it's a good it's a good branding

97:38move it's a good let's try and save the reputation but I don't know I don't know but but with that though it's like the when he hosted SNL in the monologue was about pedophilia he's like he related it to like eating a Snickers bar like you want to touch that little kid so bad and you know how horrible and how many wisent ruins and how up it makes you you know the kid and but you still do it like that's what I think that with what he did I'm like you really wanted to do that real bad cuz comics all knew we knew about it current I knew about it five years ago yeah I had heard it wasn't true and I had heard from someone who knows him better than me and I said well what do you mean and they they gave me like this weird scenario where he was joking around they were all joking around together and then the story got out and you know like he like pulled his

98:25dick out like as a joke and everyone was laughing and he it was like he was being silly and then the real story came out but yeah you know I don't know we've had people like Ari Shaffir was our podcast he pulled us they I mean he did ask but like that was fine I wanted to see his dick I want to see his guy's vasectomies so we wanted to see the scars I mean there was a reason and then also that we had never seen someone who was not circumcised before and then they would they were he was like you want to see it where they said yes up is that think about that cutting baby dicks is so common you guys gone through all your life to adulthood more than the average person she fears the first dick that you saw that wasn't sliced open as a baby it wasn't Ari's dick that was uncircumcised this was another these are two separate days I can't believe I've never encountered an

99:13uncircumcised penis Ari's a super Jew of course he's sorry was like I got the longest balls in the game and I'm like I mean shown to me like I want to see them and I'm like dude makes you there knowing each other's dicks I've never shown my to anyone Chris I seen your not I didn't like your vagina there is my kitchen I slept for a flight and woke up drunk there's no like genital mutilation tradition amongst women and people say that are all you're looking at the wrong way the foreskin is not mutilation bow the it isn't it is yeah I saw a truck in Union Square a couple months ago that's like circumcision is male genital mutilation and I was like oh yeah a lot of kids lose their dicks from it every year they lose their dicks yes not only that there's so much there's a famous story when it comes to there's a baby that was raised and raised as a woman because they did a

100:30botched circumcision on the kid when it was baby and the his penis essentially there was a massive infection they had a remove his penis and because of that they had made the decision to try to transition this person into a woman Oh and so they transitioned this person to a woman and they gave him hormones but he always wanted to be a man and it was like super confusing to him then he eventually want to committing suicide when he was a horrible story connect it is but what do you do when you cut off a baby's dick time when you can try to reconstruct this is only they've only started putting new dicks on people within the last year I think there's actually yes I think there's actually only been one or two successful penis transplants Wow yeah I mean it's harder to create a penis and it is with the create a penis you take it from a cadaver well whoa it's not the same as when they

101:28dick weird when you transition male to female you're flipping you're flipping the dick but they're at they're adding on cadaver parts when they're going female in a male know this is someone talking about I'm talking about someone who's gonna say well they reattach that that thing but they found it in the field endo they should just throw that in the river I mean yeah there's another story about a woman in Orange County who tied her boyfriend up after she drugged him tied him up and then cut his dick off and threw in the garbage disposal she's she's in jail yeah badass would you say that if a guy did that to a girl that's horrible I have a bit about like lost his penis turned circumcision 17 years ago undergoes world's third successful penis transplant but there's a color discrepancy that surgeons will fix with tattooing I mean all right you got a penis transplant I wouldn't know

102:28complained about the color it's crazy that's so goddamn crazy let me people lose their dicks because of circumcision and then when it's not totally common I mean it's it's rare but it happens when you're a cadaver who gets your dip taken off to put on another person do you is that the the when you check the box on your driver's license to donate your organs like it's all up for grabs I guess yeah Wow yeah I'll just put that out there if I die take my dick yeah you're so really nice yeah the thing is it's probably really hard to get it to work right to get all I mean it's there's it's a such a complicated organ there's so much going on in there as far as all these different connection and apparently the operation takes forever it's a long really operation taking balls are so mystical to me like when the balls you ever stare at your balls and they just think it's like

103:21there's an alien in it it's like they just move like an octopus or something they're definitely weird it's so weird the movement the first time I gave a though did surprise of the balls I know the mother shaft I didn't realize it was gonna like move with me all the skin was gonna thought it wait the skin moves with you yeah where it's like so I thought I was actually just to be like sliding oh my hands up and down boy if there was a little gate like a give there hmm oh I thought it okay I'm gonna revisit that later he does have a dick well he did say God our first three-way I this girl gave him a ninja like it was so impressive he came right away and I've never I've sucked his dick many times still do that doesn't happen and I was in the corner going huh okay you were in the corner well I mean of the bay I was no ism but uh you know I was like a word okay

104:22which and it was you know I stole the curious to see what you were doing because we learned this year Christina has been giving for sucking dicks all wrong I didn't know you had to suck like suck it when you go up like a fleshlight is pleasurable because of the suction and yours when you suck a dick you're supposed to like suck it in as you go get a little air lock a little suction ewwww I was just liking it like a lollipop and you know no one told me cuz they're probably just happy I was there giving but it's like Christina's like I love it I'm like yeah because you're not doing it right I know so much easier if I was just licking the dick the whole time I would also because it's a lot of work because it's a job Joe it depends you know a lot of my he's my hey me my boyfriend it takes like it takes a long time to come and so I mean just at a certain point your mouth is uncomfort

105:17you did that's why I don't like hand jobs I'm like you do it you do it better than me I like watching you do it why are we sitting here and I'm trying this you know unless you really want me to but I'm like are you comfortable talking about sex afore you yeah sure yeah do you have sex toys use sex toys oh I used to have the fleshlight was one of the sponsors the earliest sponsor the podcast but you didn't did you use I he dated a famous porn star right before me and I discovered he kept held on to her flashlight while hurricane sandy was flooding my apartment and curtain was over sandy strapped a life preserver to I'd do a bit about this by picked it up and I thought was a flashlight and I thought he'd thrown it away and I was like oh that's a butthole okay I have a little talk when Corinne leaves the butthole one it's just crazy that they mold it yeah I mean obviously not the

106:23internal parts but the outside they literally like put like yeah been to the place where they do stuff we went to the doc Johnson factory which is in Los Angeles and we saw the chair that looks like an OBGYNs chair where the porn stars sit and there was like remnants of like whatever the stuff the cementy stuff that they're putting in there like we're taking pictures neill and it's our Disneyland but when you jerk off with a flashlight are you closing your eyes or you'll are you imagining because like they make it look like an actual but they also made it look like an alien they made an avatar one at one point time wow I'm in a blue one like you that big blue lady that but it's just it's just a little bit of tube it's just the part you need you know what else they make that I thought was hilarious they make them that are like you know those tall boy like Pabst Blue Ribbon

107:15cans yeah they make them out of that so you unscrew that it looks like a cancer mom yeah exactly you're hiding the from your wife yeah it's like have you ever seen those little it'd be like one of these caveman night rows but you screw the top and you could stash money inside yeah are we Rockman I used to put my house keys in it but it's like it does not look like a rocket although this person hid a plastic Rock in their garden somebody's yeah it's so obviously I could leave my key in the door and it would be less obvious than this rock I went over our friend of Mines house and he had fake rock speakers in his backyard impressing no one yeah just making people think oh I see your problem is those catalogs they leave on planes I need that six-foot Bigfoot statue my for my backyard yeah he watches over the garden man you do make fake they make torsos you ever seen one of

108:20those it's just a chick's torso well it looks like you motivated those sex dolls yeah those real doll things you know they have a brothel in Germany now where it's like a sex doll brothel yeah oh yeah so bizarre that doesn't seem clean I wouldn't be comfortable about yeah the John's are getting too weird and I mean would you would you ever a sex doll for their story really really for myself I'm not stupid so I wouldn't think it's a real person no I think that was cheese beating off and then like when you're going so far that you're this rubber thing pretending it's a person you're taking it to a totally different you are yeah like you're not in a fantasy land where you're masturbating or watching porn we watch when you watch porn aren't you thinking aren't guys when they watch porn thing like like there she sucking my dick sort of what do you think they

109:33watch porn you're just thinking that the activity is exciting like the activity you're seeing yeah sucking a dick is exciting you would like it if they were doing it to you but you're not thinking oh she's doing it to me cuz you're not oh you're no you're not stupid you know but they're not they're suspension of disbelief it's like when you see a movie you know you're in a theater but if you're like holding on to some cold rubber and you got her two cold rubber feet in the air yeah oh that was the other thing the guy told me that I wrote that article I was going back and forth with him the guy with a relationship with her he said he puts her in the her in the tub she he fills the tub up with hot water to heat up the temperature of the body oh oh I mean that's weird it is very strange I want to go over to his house but it's not hurting any what do you

110:26guys think like if there is like this is theirs do you know what CRISPR is mmm it's the straw in the bottom of your fridge we believe veggies probably not though yes and no it is that but it's also a new thing they're allowing there they're starting to experiment with this new method of altering DNA they're there they're figuring out a way to do it with non viable human embryos and they're starting to do it with humans now that are alive and one a guy was recently one of the first people to be injected with DNA from CRISPR and as CRISPR gets more and more complex and more and more effective they think in the future you're not only going to be able to pick like what happens to your children like what your children are what they look like what traits they have and don't have you're literally gonna have a like a laundry list of things that you could pick and choose but you might be able to

111:21do it to yourself like they might be able to accelerate the the actual capabilities of this technology to the point where you could take you and you'd say I want to be a six foot three black woman and then shoot this stuff inside of you and then over the course of like how long long it takes to alter your body this is all speculative this guy was just the first guy ever to this recent guy see if you find that that's Rachel dollars was gonna say Rachel Dolezal you hate it a ton of those people out there but this but this technology is not going to just change the way you look it'll literally change who you are it's gonna stretch your legs out it's gonna change your features and the way your brain works do you think knockout Alzheimer's they're gonna bill stop a lot of the genes that allow people to have Parkinson's and a lot of different ailments that people have they've

112:14isolated those those genes and they think they can shut them off whoa that's good thinking I don't want to live to be 150 you might be able to though this is what's gonna get really weird like you might not want to and you might say that but maybe if you're 80 and someone says hey you want to be 30 again you might go yeah I was in good health I wouldn't mind it somebody might be willing I mean it might physically be possible for you to not just look 30 but be third Wow like literally change your your cellular structure to the point where you're a young person and that's gonna be the destruction of our society find your own genes is just an injection away if you're feeling lucky cuz right now it's very experimental but this is see but this is just speculative there's an article with the very first guy had it done yeah very first use of CRISPR on a living person so this is like like you

113:08know there's this body acceptance thing right like I'm happy with who I am be happy girl be happy boy be happy we are you're happy until someone comes along as this a menu you could be Thor you have to do it's like oh you just go to the Thor doctor it's like Halloween for life yeah shoots a Thor shot in your ass and you look like that Christopher whatever his name is guy and could you think you would be able to change it so like one day only Thor but the other next day I'm Cindy Crawford it might be probably take a while for your body to shift to whatever form it's yeah you got weight to morph and maybe if you keep doing it over and over again it's like a VHS tape where you keep copying it over and over again okay you might put some errors in your DNA and grow some extra feet and weird that's fun look thanks hooning listen there's gonna be some early adopters that are very upset and

113:58have buyer's remorse there's no doubt about that yeah and then what do you do when that had what do you do sorry but it's like plastic surgery you can alter I mean you can't obviously those there's limitations for plastic surgery but that don't seem to be on this hypothetically if it goes as far as it's like plastic surgery in the sense that there was one way they used to do it which was awful and now they're way better at it yeah sometimes you can tell ya like boob jobs yeah boob jobs now they make boobs that are soft they're smushy and you couldn't when people zone I've met a couple girls are like yeah these are fake tits like yeah really can I touch them and then when you touch them they feel like a boob yeah yeah that's crazy you're such a fake boob that felt like a real boob yeah not know but I've touched fake boobs I let that alight yeah I like fake

114:43boobs I think they're kind of fun they are fun what do you think Joe they're well reals better but it's weird like you people accept fake girl parts they do not accept fake boy parts it's really interesting and like calves and like what what is it fakes I know guys that have had PEC implants wow that's implants yeah did he look can you can you tell that they're obviously dead because he had a lot of issues getting a lot of weird surgery and you know she one of the things he got was PEC implants Wow yeah that's nice to know that sometimes men can be just as insecure as women that's synthoid what that guys doing this he's injecting oil into his muscles to make his muscles larger and bulky I mean that's not healthy right no no those guys getting the massive infections oh my god you're shooting game sixteenth-century no Mitch Hedberg got that how did you have

115:47Berg before he died a couple years before he wound up overdosing we were Stanhope and I were hanging out and he got the call that Mitch was in the hospital for gangrene I'm like am i shooting heroin into the same song okay that makes sense yeah you can get gangrene for sure people get it today nothing to worry about yeah but the thing is like you should be happy with who you are if you can't change it so what we're getting into is this weird place in the future did you found that article oh you're out there glenoid I've found that I had jumped on that but there was an article from very reason thousand 16 that said someone in China was injected I know it's really really recent the reason well in the last couple of days it said man becomes the first living patient for crisper they injected crisper DNA what's in it was in the last week or two teen died article I'm typing

116:43that in it says it's from 2016 and the recent one says four embryos Google search really recent really really recent have you ever heard of poop enemas yeah those are interesting okay yeah here it is genes altered inside a person for the first time ever this is it exactly in a bold experiment that has never been done before a man had his genes altered permanently an attempt to cure a disease so this is one step and this guy had a disease and decided to take this chance and do this and so scientists for the first time I've tried editing the gene inside the body and a bold attempt to permanently change a person's DNA to cure a disease the experiment was done Monday in California on 44 year-old Brian Maddox Madhu Madhu through an IV he received billions of copies of a corrective gene and genetic tool to cut his DNA in a precise spot it's kind of humbling to be

117:40the first test said Madhu who has a metabolic disease called hunter syndrome I'm willing to take the risk hopefully it will help me and other people well good for that guy for being the first guy to to take that chance because that's one of the things that they need is yeah someone who's willing yeah and he like I said as an early adopter they'll learn from him and maybe be able to improve it but the point is this is happening at an incredible pace CRISPR was just discovered a few years ago Dan that's exciting it's there's a great radio lab podcast on it spelled UCR is PR I think it is I think it has an e in it but if you look up the radio that podcast it is phenomenal and it's it's crazy when they explain how they discovered this and what implications are I gotta tell my mom about that she's got so many health things and neurological and every doctor

118:30was ever in Canada's like I don't know sorry and she's like really was she around like any sort of like yeah no the only thing she she's pretty sure she had Lyme disease and she didn't know I have Lyme disease but I got the bullseye right away and I got the antibiotics now they give you two weeks a Novak's I only got ten days at the time so I feel like maybe I need to go back but I don't I don't I have a very sensitive stomach and that's all that's all yeah it doesn't getting worse and worse and worse yeah kidding yeah yes not good but on something like 60% of the ticks in the Upper Hudson Valley have Lyme disease something insane like yeah it's really high levels and it's all over the East Coast and you know for a long time doctors didn't even know what the it was oh yeah and yet that's I'm pretty sure cuz it's neurological for shit's neurological and she has like she has an

119:25arachnoid cyst in the base of her stem but they don't know if it was there when she was born and arachnoid sit arachnoid cyst yeah it just spiders kind of it's like a big ball and then it like wraps around her the base of her skull and her the top of her spinal cord yeah and they think she just got diagnosed with dementia and they think that possibly draining it would do something but they don't know but then she just got half of her intestines taken out she has she's one of the three percent of people who gets Bell's palsy and it doesn't go back and she forget Bell's palsy is from Lyme disease oh oh yes I remember reading that because I didn't know you could get Bell's palsy and then it goes back to normal and it's more common it's like 97% chance your face is gonna go back to normal or the the atrophy that happened Wow a friend of Mines son got it he was really young

120:11and in front of me his son got Lyme disease and he brought the son to the doctor and doctor didn't think it was Lyme disease and then finally the kid had Bell's palsy and that's when they realized and then they started giving him like serious antibiotics and some was very young to I think he was only four up oh yeah intense she had a she had a stroke though when she gave birth to my brother my older brothers our first kid and that's then after that was when the Bell's palsy happened so I'm like I guess it's a connected to that she's like a walking health phenomenon yeah she is she is CRISPR yeah I'm sound that probably could help actually who knows I mean we'll see what happens to this guy with hunter syndrome boat if this really works and this is all like I said this discovery of CRISPR is only a couple years old they're already starting to use it on

120:56living humans that's pretty cool she's at the end of a rope to the point where she would say whatever do it I don't care so I feel like she'd be a good candidate for that see the thing about Lyme disease - is it has a neurotoxic element to it that it causes like mental disorders yeah yeah then you know what it's also correct it's connected to something called more challenge disease oh I've heard of that it's like people start thinking they have fibers growing out of their skin they start scratching themselves and in the the hallucinate I did a TV show about it and one of the things that I found that was fascinating was there was one doctor who was like a legitimate doctor who had more Jones disease and it was explaining the hallucinations that he would have while he had because he had Lyme disease as well and he was thinking that when you get bit by a bug and that bug has like

121:44Lyme disease and tick diseases are very very they vary in intensity and they also vary in how many different different pathogens that tick can contain and so the way he was describing it to me so like you're talking about one symptom like something that happens to you when you have a host of different pathogens and he said some of those pathogens he believes contain neurotoxic elements that causes people to hallucinate and why those hallucinations is they think that things are growing on their skin and they start scratching themselves and he was seeing it on his eyeball he was saying you look in the mirror and he would see something crawling across his eyeball that he knew knew wasn't really there because he was so smart because he was a doctor he was recognizing like okay I am my brain is malfunctioning I've got a real issue here in the toxic element of this Lyme disease is

122:34spreading through his body and don't succumb to it yeah and so he would he challenges like widely dismissed by a lot of medical practitioners as being a psychosomatic disorder think that people are just crazy and they're hallucinating but he's saying yes but if you look into that they almost all have Lyme disease I'm saying it is connected and people are missing this connection yeah yeah I have yeah I feel like we've we've always debated my mom and I the for mental is from that from limes and then like I've haven't I don't have many symptoms of lines but one thing I've been getting lately like the past commute five years it's anger attacks like rage that I can't I have to do something to get it out of my body it's watching that girl soccer boys dick but that was fun how come I was jerking off to it no but it would just come out of nowhere and I'm like it it feel it felt like I felt

123:27like The Incredible Hulk like I wanted it's a medical issue that something was going on like there was a like there's like a problem like oh because it didn't it wasn't attached to hormonal wasn't PMS I also have bad PMS but that's more anxiety it's not anger I would get these an anger attacks and I would have to scream my poor boyfriend like I would scream I still do scream into a pillow until I can't talk anymore and polyps on my vocal cords and I feel like that's the mom happen but it's I need to get it out I don't punch somebody but I need to break something or I need a I need to hurt myself so I can feel embarrassed and then come down from it but at least you confirm my suspicions that all funny people are up oh yeah oh yeah oh my god you don't seem very up yeah what's your though how you think that's what in why I get it out from martial arts but of my whole life

124:16of be people on fault no no not but I've been in competitions yeah but that's healthy though innit yeah it's maybe not now I got hit in the head a lot when I was uh well your brain works well you know in there yeah it works pretty good but it's also there's a hair-trigger there there's a hair trigger mechanism that always wants to flip off it always wants to go dark you do like what could we what would trigger an event like some someone doing something bad something happening where to you or to anybody - anybody to me to anybody there's just a there's a the anger switch where I'm not real comfortable that I have a you know like if you have your finger on a and the trigger is very light and you you're applying pressure you very like whew this could go off any second mm-hmm like there's that something goes weird oh that sucks it's does but if you work out a lot you

125:09can keep it in check yeah I work out I lift weights I do a train and I do like like deadlifts and squats and and that I love physical labor I love using my muscles and and it it takes my anxiety away and it makes the rage attacks way less I feel like I have a lot of testosterone in me you probably do I mean that's probably why you like threesomes and a lot of crazy that some girls wouldn't be into yeah yeah you know but it's long it's all I'm like finding what you need to do to kind of balance out whatever biological issues you have that's what it is because right now at this point like I feel like the world doesn't see the anger attacks but my poor boyfriend because I live with them so he's the one that gets the brunt of it and he cares about me and he'll go do when this happens do you want me to come upstairs do you want me to ignore you I'm like I don't know I'm sorry

125:55have you ever do you ever like do like a boxing class or something like it bought a punching bag did kickboxing once and I cried the whole class even I was in a good mood that day I just my friend Melissa like loves kickbike she's very athletic and she's like you should come with me to a tiger strohman class and I was like okay and then I came and oh man I went to town on that punching bag punching yeah yeah yeah I mean the thing it like I yeah I should take boxing class I just don't like what anybody else is around because it's kind of embarrassing that we were talking about before would because you're in a rage room by yourself yeah but I they don't have them in New York City a rage room is a place they have my life is a ring to it men need rage rooms more than anyone okay do you would you break no okay so these are they'll go to a thrift store they'll pop by all the you know

126:59from it like please and you can go in there with a baseball bat just to this is my fantasy I mean that's Wayne I would break glass for wasteful but yeah this seems wasteful to me now I love it like this guys like half-ass Annette trying hard he's not mad at all he's just trying to these girls yeah yeah I might have some like hidden rage oh hey like that guy yeah this guy's like examinee that's kinda hot to see he's not even angry that see that's me you're so faking it yeah and angry the way he's hitting things I mean if I'm in a rage room I do not want there to be cameras oh my god they put chest protectors on you what a bunch of yeah these consequences to God but I want to destroy some and not have there be any consequence this is what I think you should do I think you should seriously try to meditate because I think it would help you yeah sometimes it makes me angry you

128:10should do that and go take the kick box let's go punch it back cry I bet I bet it'll get it out of your system maybe I bet it will maybe I've screamed man and I'm wolf it's alarming yeah which are you I love yoga I do yoga a lot I do I usually excuse of time it does help I but I like like that's why I like weightlifting like I I got up to a point where I was I was squatting 175 pounds and it was oh it felt so good and it felt like I was every cell in my body was working for something and I got energy out and if I hadn't gotten that energy out I would have just like had a anger it excites your whole endocrine system to the thing about lifting weights specifically like squats and deadlifts and these big giant complex movements is that it forces your body to get stronger in a way that it excites your hormonal system it makes your bones denser that's one of the most

129:00yeah it's a great way to combat osteoporosis is to lift weights I just like it because it's the one time like I like physical activity because you could you I have to think about the physical activity I'm doing so I can't stress about my career yeah the only time I don't think about like getting ahead I'm just like that I it's the only time I'm in the moment really and I love talking to trainers because perfecting about my boyfriend said to me the other days like you never looked me in the eye when we fought I'm like we have a sex podcast so I think that I mean before before we had the sex podcast it was more freeing for me now I do think of work when I think of sex because when you have a sex podcast that is my rants so yeah well it's an ironic thing about careers is that you specialize yourself yeah like you paralyze the creativity because you're thinking about advancement and getting

130:00ahead and success instead of thinking about creative ideas like look and you could definitely like have too much of one or the other I mean you only think about creative and never never get your career on line because you just never figure out how to monetize things and don't put pressure on the idea like when guys we it just came out of like let's just do this we didn't and I and I was nervous to do it cuz the name was so brash and I knew it was good but I'm like damn my mom's gonna find out and I was worried about that hid it from her for two years successfully but I we honestly both of us were like no one's gonna wasn't a no one's gonna listen me talk about my so might as well just talk about it and not care don't see the less that's the way podcasts evolve the best yeah when I first started doing it me and my friend Brian we just started around with a laptop yeah red van right yeah

130:50set up a laptop and we're doing it on Ustream and we didn't even have it uploaded to iTunes yeah just doing this live streaming thing and then people to ask questions and there was like 200 people watching and it was like that was the early days there was no pressure on it at all yeah and then I'll do this every week and then every week started building and building and building then we started getting some numbers and those like people watching this thing and then it got weird well it's cool because like doing your podcast you can do every late-night show on television and you get you reach more people cuz podcasts you can hear anywhere there's internet in the world you can get access to it that's so powerful it's definitely that and there's also no one's interrupting you no one's telling you what to talk about like think about some of the fucked-up we've said in the last couple hours

131:34I know we go sponsors are fine with and pitch like dark and just see the blood to rated for their face and like I'll you but then you remember you have to be when you're jeana's never gonna sign on to that concert yeah hell no different world those people those TV people they live in a world of tricking dummies in the middle of the country that's what they look for the next three and a Half Men like what yeah I get what can I need a Big Bang Theory to shove down these morons throats right they were really open it about it they're like a lot of concepts we pitched they're like yeah but the middle of the country and there's a lot of great people in another country now - this is the one thing about the middle of the country it doesn't exist anymore because the middle country has the Internet - yeah so like ignorance is I mean there's gonna be pockets of ignorance no matter what you

132:26do and we found that out in Charlottesville like there was a big like shocker for a lot of people they didn't know that yeah there's still people with tiki torches walking on the street talking about the the blend of our fathers and all this goofy but you're you're finding more and more people and like if you tour you can go to places like Kansas City you're a shitload of cool people do we were in Spokane we had a gig and Spokane Spokane and Salt Lake City awesome I bet our live show is very you gonna love it again hate it and I would go to going to like a more conservative state I'm like to see they like that coming exactly it's like they found their their podcast in that helps them live in Dallas Texas where maybe we did a segment called we did a segment called sexting theater like who in here sex and then when they raise their hand like give me your phone

133:23I want to do a theatrical interpretation of their sex the raunchiest one I didn't want to read it I was blushing was in Dallas yes guy talking about sucking a fart out of someone's body like it was our first gay man so of course he was much everybody but I was like that's impressive and unexpected you were on board with the the fart sucking until you heard I was I was trying to take it all in and then he hit me with gay man it won't even further so much I've missed that part of my life licked yes finger in the bottle no why not you have a prostate in there you don't do it after you've eaten a burrito I agree with you no okay wait I don't want to lick I'm gonna give you a homework assignment take it for the girl with a bullet for a ring that's where bullets belong on jewelry but everyone thinks is a cocaine vial I'm like I wants a good point never thought it'd be but a piece pot

134:22stimulator so your prostate is your g-spot and you just put it in and then you know it's not Ram it you just put it in you have sex so you put in a knee jerk off the or when I hear men talk about like they love women when they when a woman comes it's so hot to them I've never experienced that with men because there I was like oh but this thing I'm telling you surprised I could reenact that so many times I've seen it yeah but when they have when my boyfriend has the enero soon as the product that we use the what an arrows and ER OS it's a prostate simulator piece what simulator it's a rod you shove in there yeah it's not as it's more like gently glide with yeah it's shaped like it's not that big and not intimidating a bit and and you put it any we have sex Gazza yes like a like a curved baby dick you ruined that no it's it's like it's like a mini dildo for

135:19your butt we're all having a nice time no but and then you have sex your do what you gonna do anyway and the orgasm for the guy is so much more intense to the point where I'm like that's the hottest thing I've ever seen the hottest thing I've ever seen and he likes it so you should try it okay do you have a good orgasm face I'm not looking in the mirror where I come off in front of the mirror yeah just look at yourself angry or sad you got a pic where you come that would maybe drive for a new Trident series yeah Wow Wow like sperm the one we use is is black I think I don't suggest getting a white would cuz let me pull it out but you check in the oil I hate to end this podcast on this note like I said many times before I think you guys you you prove to me that you don't have to be like a famous person to have a very successful podcast and people kept saying that to me like oh it's

136:24oversaturated you can't like and I always say what about guys we I go those girls came out of nowhere they're always top ten I go they're kicking ass and they're just good they just they flow together you having fun together thank you it's great every time you mention us man it's spiking it's really you who are powerful you really gotta powerful but you got you're like you're the you're the top podcast all the time one time we were above you in Canada and everyone freaked out they emailed us and they're like holy I just felt like we are not worthy oh my god but we appreciate it I'm it's nice to earn somebody's respect that you respect and it's because you you have something that's good I appreciate you guys too and I appreciate the fact that you guys are really good at being yourselves you know and I think that I'm a professional yeah because that's I mean that's what half of our book is

137:12about is about that just nominally being me that that's all I'm offering isn't it amazing that that in itself is incredibly rare it it makes me sad but yes I shouldn't make you sad because I think it's gonna be less rare people can change I hope I hope so I think human beings and I think our culture is evolving like we were talking about like the social climate that's happening and how many things are going on right now and words that people are not supposed to use anymore and things that people used to think of as being commonplace and now thought it was being problematic there's a lot it does feel like there's a there's a shift I feel it it's I think and along with things like this CRISPR technology and a bunch of other probably unforeseen technologies that are being worked on right now as we speak I think some weird is going in 40 years we're all to be like basketball players and

138:01it's gonna be fun they're gonna be aliens I would you know I would choose that CRISPR would you with the big gray head and the black eyes and a lien would you like big old titties can kill people number one I would be purple and metallic those are aesthetically icy to be like that chess monster third thing you see on your chest yeah you might have more control over your neck see if you just wham it down on things oh I wish ranek I could just put it I kick you just like in on that note thank you ladies thank you so much for having us guys we you can get it on iTunes and elsewhere Twitter's philanthropy gal Kristina hutch with two eyes that's it goodbye everybody it was so much fun