Russell Peters

00:00It's been three years since he text back. We are live right now and our brother Joey Coco Diaz is in Chicago tonight if you are lucky to get tickets to his show at Zy's in Rosemont, Illinois. It's not technically Chicago, right? How far away is that? Rosemont. It's like 20 minutes. 20 minutes just outside. That's where Joey is. And he's uh he's filming tonight for CISO. CISO is some Yeah, exactly. Some new thing that uh Doug Stanh Hope has a special on CISO. Now Joey has a special on CISO and apparently it's like NBC is doing something some something that NBC's doing. Well, Netflix is giving apparently $40 million to Chris Rock. So what did you hear that? Yeah. What? $40 million for two specials. Jesus. That's insane. Jesus. That's $20 million a special. Um that's a record I would say. They got into a bidding war with HBO apparently for like uh Wow.

00:56HBO went up to 30 million. Then Netflix said, "Fuck you. Here's 40." Holy Netflix is balling. Yeah, but now I feel jipped. Netflix is out of control right now, but so is HBO. I've been watching Westworld. Have you watched Westworld? Is that on HBO? Yeah. Holy That's where it is. It's good. I've heard about it, but I thought it was like on CBS or something. Good. Yeah, it's good. Yeah. That's where they go into that weird uh like a fake world and robots and Yeah. It's like it's based on that 1973 movie with uh Ule Brener Westworld. Good old Ule. Yeah. Which was basically the same kind of movie. It was basically the same as the show. How many times did I say basically in the first five minutes? Uh but what it was is uh it's, you know, so people can go and have like a fantasy and live in the Wild West, but obviously the robots don't play and they start malfunctioning and that's where I'm in

01:48episode two. started kind of like Cowboy Logan's Run. Logan's Run. Wow. I don't even remember that. Really? I don't remember Logan's Run. I barely remember. I'm trying to remember. Logan's Run when I was a kid. What was Logan's Run? Was it a series or a movie? It was a series. It was I think it was a movie and then it became a series. Yeah, there it is. Oh, wow. I remember the poster. Welcome to the 23rd century. Isn't that weird? That is weird. It's so weird what they thought we were going to be living like. Like, do you remember space 1999? Yeah, I remember everything was I remember when I was break dancing in 1984, there was a move called a 1990 where you jumped on you remember that move you jumped on one hand you you flipped up upside down on one hand and spun the move that um Cuba Gooding Jr. did in uh Go back go back to those pictures. Go back to the first one you

02:36went to. Look at that. They got one thing right. People are going to be wearing pre- ripped pants like Yeah. And girls are going to be showing their vaginas. Yeah. They got both of those things right. And that hairstyle's back. So, both hairstyles are back. Chicks are wearing hairstyles like that, too. Yeah. So, what did the what was the move? The 1990. And then Oh, that's good stuff. Is that real? That's cosplay. But I could keep causing girl. Yeah. Whatever you doing or see, I'm so happy that girls still dress like that. All this crazy talk of women, you know, like not not dressing sexy or alluring like that is just disturbing to me. Russell Peters. I don't I don't want that to change. I mean, you know, it depends on when and where they're doing it, right? No, do it whenever you want. Give them the green light. Office buildings, everything. Office buildings

03:28would be great. yeah. I remember going into office building just getting a hard on looking at the secretaries and the heels. A full heart on you. I was in my early 20s, late 19s, you know. You know, you're a mad man. I was a lunatic with a hell. Different kind of guy. Just knocking over with my You didn't grab any though, did you? I was not a grabber. I'm not either. I No, I don't even know how you grab a without actually fingering it. Yeah. Like, how do you grab it on the outside? Maybe that's the benefit of having those little hands. Yeah, little hands could grab. You can just fully grab a pinch like one of those uh like folder holder things that you used. Little paper clips. Yeah. Oh, I know those ones. Clamps steel. Donald Clamp running for president. Clamp and pinch. There's a hilarious uh meme that I saw that somebody put online. It's It's so funny.

04:18It shows different presidential quotes throughout history. Like the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. Franklin Delanor Roosevelt. Ask not what your country can do for you, but ask what you can do for your country. John F. country. John F. Kennedy. Grab them by the Donald Trump. Like this is where we are. This is really where we are. We we turned reality into reality. Yeah. Do you think that that's what started it all? That like reality TV like from Survivor on exposing the world to instead of instead of to people that we've created like Magnum PI or you know fill in the blank, you know. Yeah. They gave us Yeah. They gave us things. We used to have things to strive to want to be. Yes. Um, and then they took it down to lowest common denomin took away all that. Now we can just be normal again. We we can we can be hopeless. Yeah. They brought it down

05:14to Snookie. Yeah. You know, they went from they went from people that you could never be Macgyver. Yeah. Gets out of every situation. But I that's confusing too though, right? Because people start thinking that they can be Macgyver or that they can get your brain moving. Yeah, it you know, it kind of gives it a little jog. It makes you think sideways, you know, and and gives you the opportunity to think laterally. But when you got a dummy just saying things that you want to hear, you go, "H, okay, I can turn it off now, guys." That's the one thing that confuses me the most about Donald Trump. I didn't know there were that many out there. Like, I kind of knew, but I didn't know they were going to organize. It would It was It's weird to me that, you know, when you meet people that again you thought were level-headed thinking people. Is that Eric Be like

06:01Eric Beam Rakim? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Eric Be's actually living at my house in Vegas right now. Shut the up. Really? Yeah. Damn, dude. You know, I keep it hip-hop, son. You do? Yeah, you do. What about Rakim Town? Rakim is not living in the house. No. No. They're they secretly. I think they may be getting back together secretly. You just gave it up. I mean, I don't I can't say that they are. I said they may be. I mean, well, you're starting rumors. That's the way to go to That's the way to go to get that one started. Trying to get everybody paid. Oh, I love those guys. We were just talking about them yesterday. Were you? Yeah. Yeah, we were talking Who was on yesterday? Was that Jesse? Uh Jesse Ventur and then Redban, but we were talking about uh Eric B and Rakim. We're talking about EPMD. Yep. I'm friends with DJ Scratch from EPMD. Oh I'm almost friends with the DJ of the group.

06:48Have you noticed that? Yeah. Well, you're a DJ. That makes sense. Yeah. It's like us being friends with comedians. Yeah. We happen to know one or two of them. Yeah. Isn't it a funny thing about being a comic? Like you run into another comic somewhere and you're like, "Ah, you come here, you. We're around regular people. Get over here." We're all left brain thinkers. We need to be together. Is that what it is? Yeah, that's the the left brain. Yeah, that's what I've heard. We're like Is that real? I don't know. Like if you kick somebody in the left side of the head, does it up their jokes? I don't know. Some What? Somebody sent me something that says uh uh that it's in my It's on my Whatever. But it was about how some sort of head trauma can make your brain uh relate everything to a joke after. Well, there's a book that Sam Kenisonson's brother wrote, Brother

07:36Sam, and uh it's all about how Sam Well, it's all about Sam, but it's all a big part of it is how Sam changed when he got hit by a car. He was a little kid and he got nailed by a car and really up. And from that point on, he became this maniac. this wild, crazy, reckless Like before that, he was like a normal kid and bang, one hard shot to the head and all of a sudden he's oh, like all the crazy ranting and the the the sermons he used to give. When I guess when you get close to death, you look at it one of two ways, right? You could I don't think that's it. I think it's traumatic brain injury. That's what I'm saying. But like again, your brain goes, "Oh, Well, we didn't suffer through that. Now let's just enjoy the rest of this." That would be nice if that was if that made sense. If that was a fact. I don't know. But I like making up my own facts. Yeah. I

08:25think what it is damage. I think damage to the brain, like actual physical damage affects impulse control and it it has uh something to do with that and getting angry quicker. There's there's a bunch of factors that come into play that you see with football players, too. Yeah. Um that uh you're I think they'd be hilarious after all those times. I know, right? Maybe they aren't. Maybe we need to find one right before they become too stupid to talk and just ask them like, "What? What do you find?" I mean, they weren't that bright to begin with. So, how dare you say that? They can be bright. If they're big and giant and they wanted to make money, football is the way to go, right? What else you going to do? Be a strong man. I don't know. I mean, you could fight if you want. How much is a strongman? You can't even fight if you're that big because like at 265 pounds, that's the weight

09:11limit for MMA. There's a limit on so weird. It's so weird because remember Emanuel Yarro was he 600 lb. Yeah. Look what happened to him. Keith Hackne slapped him into a coma. It's true. It's true. Didn't he break his wrist on that? He hit him with a slap. It was that side weird side. Well, once he got him down, he was hammerfisting him. He was like one of the first guys to do the hammer fist in a fight. I remember seeing that and going, "That's a terrible punch. It's effective." You know what's cool about a hammer fist is like you can do this to a table like this oak table. Yeah. And it doesn't hurt your hand at all. But if you did that with your knuckles, you'd be like, "Ah." Yep. But it's weird that we punch with our knuckles. Well, you know, we just associate this soft padded part is not going to hurt you. Exactly. It hurts a lot. Yeah. Like hammer fists are very effective.

09:59Have you hammerfisted anybody? No. No, I never hammerfisted anybody. Listen, not that I can remember. I just realized we went into fisting real quick. When you when you're spitting back fist somebody, there's two ways to do it. You could do it with the actual back of the hand, but that hurts. Like if you hit someone's chin, very tender there. Yeah. If you hit someone's chin with the very back of your hand, you could your you could break your hand for sure, but the the right way to do a spinning back fist is with the hand down with the the palm of the hand facing down with the fist. So in that way, you are hammerfisting someone. You really It's really hammer fist more than a spinning back fist. That's the way to do it, right? I've never done a spinning back fist on anybody. No, it's a brutal move. You got to really time that one right. Yeah, you do. You got to know. You gota be You got

10:42to be very confident knowing that you're turning your back on the guy real quick. It's weird all the different ways people figured out how to people up. I was I was watching a street fight uh today between these two chicks here for real. No, no, no, no. It was on It was on Instagram. Somebody said Oh, was it the one where the girls said, "Kick my ass, Kick my ass." You said you were going to kick my ass. Kick my ass, It was two white girls sounding like really ghetto black girls. I didn't even listen cuz my wife was there. I just watched a blonde girl and Yeah. And she her hand seen that one, dude. See, you know. Yeah. It uh she like throws her to the ground. She kind of like kind of curbs her a little bit, too. It just beats the out of her. And she got attacked. She got attacked. She totally turned around, beat that girl's ass. Yeah. And she kept chasing her. And that girl kept

11:27talking Yes. While she was beating the out of her. I'm like, well, you know, if you hit her on the jaw, maybe she'd go to sleep and you wouldn't have to hear her talk anymore. But the girl, my point was when she had her down, she's hammerfisting him. Like people know that's a legit move now. Like MMA has changed street fighting forever. It really has. yeah. People know. They know what to do now. You know, and you could see like especially with kids, there's a ton of videos of trained kids who actually know how to fight and they get attacked by someone who doesn't know how to fight and they wind up arm baring them or getting him in a mounted like the kid that did that to Cat Williams. Oh yes. Yeah. Well, that kid was a wrestler. Yeah. Yeah. He was 17. I thought he was only 15. Whatever he was, he was a teenager. Yes. He got, you know, and he got him in a nice seat.

12:08stretched him out and everything. He He got his back and just stretched him. What the is wrong with Cat Williams? I don't know, man. He's one of us. What's he doing? I don't know. He's one of us, but he's also one of those guys, it seems like who's uh who's hitting that pipe every now and then. I don't know. I I I can't confirm nor deny those allegations. There's definitely some stimulants involved. There's something going on. Yeah, something's gone ary. Yeah, I'm fascinated by him because I think he's one of the best comics alive in bursts like in in moments, but then he'll have these horrible wretched shows where there's class action lawsuits where people want their money back and he winds up leaving, but then he gets it back together and has some amazing stories. Like he'll put together a special and have amazing stories based on all the up he did. It's almost like

12:53he does it on purpose. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. But I don't think he does. But it seems like he could write he could write the ship. Like he just like, "Fuck it. I'm steering into the wind." He steers into the wind and then he's like, "All right, that did not work out. We gota we got to get the Cat Williams boat back online. We got to turn this around. There's an iceberg coming." Yeah. And he figures out how to write the ship. And then he comes back around. But man, when he's on, he's funny. Yeah. Because he's fearless. Yeah. Absolutely fearless. Yeah. He definitely does not give a And with his hair, his the something about that conked out hair and the sweat, you know, and profuse sweat. That's that Molly sweat. That's that that's sweating that MDMA out of your system. Did you ever see the time where him and Steve Harvey they uh they did this thing

13:44together? It was real weird. It was like they they were touring together. That doesn't make any sense to me at all. Steve Harvey would go on first and then Cat Williams would go on second and uh I guess they were like talking about each other leading up to the show. So Steve Harvey goes on and then Cat Williams spends the first 10 minutes mocking him and it is brutal and hilarious. Well, I'm I'm on I'm with Cat on that one. Yeah, it's hard to not be. That Steve Harvey guy is a weird dude. I've never met him, actually. You know, 27 years in this game, I never met Steve Harvey. Well, I met him a long time ago back when he was essentially doing a Richard Prior impression. When I met him in the '9s, Yeah. he was doing Richard Prior on stage. I mean, it was crazy. Like, if you didn't know, you would think like, is this guy like auditioning for a Richard Prior movie or something

14:38like that? Yeah. I I don't remember his standup at all from back then. It wasn't like he was doing Prior's material, but he was talking as if he was Richard Prior, right? You know, there was the whole thing like guys, there's you know how it is. There's like you get influence. Yeah. Did you ever do that? Um there was no I mean I was always into like Carlin and stuff like that. So I I was not smart enough to copy Carlin. I mean I knew my intelligence level was far lesser than Carlin. So I would uh I would just do what I did. I caught myself on stage once sounded exactly like Richard Jenny and I was like Jesus. Oh wow. Exactly. You went in. Yeah. Yeah. I mean I I was open micer but I I Now there's you know there's a whole slew of uh comics that try to sound like Mitch. Really? Yeah. There's a few of them out there and it freaks me out and everyone's on their dick and I'm like

15:30wait you know that's Mitch right that they're doing. Well like okay you can't tell me names but yeah. Well, Hedber had such a distinct style. That would be kind of crazy. But you hear with a tell. I mean, in New York, there's like five or six guys that I could name right now. Everybody at the cellar has the same way of speaking. They're all a tell babies. Yeah. Yeah. Or that. Shut up, stupid. You know, it's Everybody wants to be Keith Robinson. Oh, that too, right? Yeah. Yeah. But it's interesting, you know, that's one of the reasons why everybody with the with the What's that? Uh, that's just that's a that's a seller thing. What are you doing? Uh, I get it. Uh, what do you uh They're always Everything makes them uh Who does that? Who's that coming from? When you go to the seller next time you talk to us, you'll just hear everybody and you be like, "Oh my god, that's the

16:19seller talk." I like it. Clicks. It is a little clicky. But little clicks. But I get sucked into it when I'm there, too. I just do it because I'm around them. I mean, I'm like, I guess this is what we're doing, guys. Yeah. It's It's interesting how little clubs like like the seller just spawn. They just take off and it's becomes the spot. I mean, you think about how many spots could be the spot in New York City. Yeah. Doesn't New York City like have a hundred comedy clubs or something crazy? There's a ton of them and they there's new ones opening all the time and then there's people try doing a nice one or a classier one and that never works. Yeah. You need the nice grimy seller. I mean, it's just it is what it is. Low ceiling, everybody packed in real tight and then you get like the the the A-list of comics walking through there. Yeah. just to pra. Isn't it funny that it's

17:04also funny too that like to practice the best place to practice is a little tiny place? Always. Yeah. Yeah. You don't want to practice in front of a room full of people, three three 400 people. Have you ever thought about doing a special in front of a tiny group of people? Um I have, but then you know Sarah did the uh one what in front of like 12 people or something like that? She did? Yeah, she did one like with really small audience. Oh, wasn't it Largo? Yeah. How big is Largo? You ever been? She did it like in one of the small rooms at Largo. Oh, really? Yeah. Huh. But I mean, if anybody can make that work, Sarah Silverman can. Yeah. She's funny. She doesn't do enough. She doesn't do enough and she doesn't get the respect she deserves. I don't think I don't think so either. Yeah. I mean, she's she's not funny on a curve like, oh, that's She's a funny woman.

17:53No, she's I I told her that once. I said, you know, Sarah, you're one of my favorite comics. Not one of my favorite female comics, one of my favorite comics as a human being comic. I saw her at the store maybe a year ago and she was murdering just murdering and I was like man I sometimes I forget how good she is. You forget a how good she is how great her jokes are written and you know I get through this I go through this little phase when I like now I'm back at the zero point with no material and I've been going out every night but my my trick is to go and host so that way there's not too much expectation on me. Right. That's a good move. Yeah. So I can get my confidence back and then I could see, you know, the level of talent around me and and what what what way everybody's thinking and uh you know then I then I can figure out if I want to tell stories or if I want to tell

18:38jokes, you know, right? Yeah. When do you write? Do you write in front of a computer? Do you write on a notebook? I don't physically write anything ever. Really? Ever? A lot of guys are like that. Bill Bur doesn't either. Yeah. I was with Billy the other night, too. Yeah, we had that conversation about that. I can't I I feel like it's uh well, first of all, I'm too lazy. That's the real issue. It has nothing more to do with anything than I don't want to sit down and write this. I don't even want to watch my sets. My Almost Famous special is out now. I haven't watched it. No, it was it was sent to me months ago and I was like, I got Is it on Netflix? Yeah. When When did you film it? Uh in April. And did how many times did you watch it? Not once. You didn't watch it all the edits? Not even once. My brother was sat in on the edits and then my mom was watching it in my my mom

19:23was in town. My mom's in town so she was watching in the living room the other day and I walked past like, "What are you watching?" She goes, "You." And then I was listening here and there like, "Why' they keep that in? Why' they get I'm" I'm like, "That sucks. Why would you keep that in?" Yeah. I just watched the trailer for my special today and I was just I don't like watching myself either. Oh yeah, yours is coming out like in a what a week or two? October 21st. So what's the in a week basically? Yeah. Next Friday. Yeah. Next Friday. 21st I opened for you. You did? Yeah. Last week my special aired. So Oh. Oh. I'm like what? I'm like I know I smoked a lot of pot, but Yeah. I've never We know we've never done a show together. I don't think we've done the Ice House. Oh, that's true. I hosted that night. Yeah. Well, I'll do it again then. yeah, dude. I like hosting. It's fun for

20:05me. I'm there again on um the 28th. Uh the f Friday the 28th. I think I am in uh San Jose that weekend if I'm not mistaken. Oh, really? San Jose improv. I love that place. That improv is the It's great. But again, I have no act. So, you know, if if anybody is coming out to see me, just understand that I don't have an act right now. So, well, you got a little bit of an act. Like, how much you have? Zip. I have literally nothing. I have one joke and I I could say it now, but then it's over, you know? How much time do you give yourself before I start doing theaters again? I wait till I got jokes, actual jokes. I wait till I got at least 40 minutes. So, do you like just keep banging it out and then go, "Okay, we're good." Start booking Yeah. Or do you get in like a few months and you go, "All right, now I'm going to give myself a deadline." Uh, deadlines are good for

20:57us. Yeah. Because otherwise, we're just, you know, we'll just keep coasting. That's how for me, writing a new special is very important. Like, putting a special out and then chucking it and then writing all new It's so important because otherwise, we all know those guys that have been around forever doing the same material. Oh, I know some comics in Canada. Hilarious. Their acts are funny as hell, but they've been doing the same act for 30 years. That's so crazy. And then they give me They knew the last special wasn't very good. I go, "Yeah, well, you know what? You haven't done new material in 30 years." They actually say that to you. Yeah. I get people, they get a little brave on the internet there. They're a little jealous. Little bold. A little jealous of Russell. Russational. They'll make their little Facebook statuses. Mr. Worldwide like Pitbull. That's it. I'm shitbull.

21:43shitful. You can't help yourself. It's a the pun. It's a problem. I was I was killing Joe with the puns at Kill Tony. Well, it was I was trapped in a pun sandwich between Tony Hitchcliffe on one side and Russell Peters on the other side and the puns were flowing like water. Would you like this on bread or a pun? I had to start doing puns myself and I rarely do puns. I was throwing them in myself just to keep up with these guys. So, we're idiots. Well, it's such a specific style of joke, the pun. You know what it is? It it takes you back to your father cuz fathers always did puns. Yeah, that's like the the silly clever thing to say. My my father or your you have an uncle who had the puns, what have you. Yeah, what have you. Dude, you you tour everywhere, man. Like you were in Dubai and you you go in Saudi Arabia. Holy What is that like? um you do the show as men on one side,

22:40women on the other. Good. So, stay over there. Yeah. I was asking them like why like why why they're like and honestly the guys were telling me and these are like normal supposed to be normal level-headed men telling me this. Uh and these weren't like you know any high ups or anything. These are normal guys. Oh, cuz the women they'll go crazy and they'll want to attack us. So I'm like I I look at you dude and look at them. They're they're not trying to attack you. They will they'll want to attack you like like and have sex with them in the streets. That's that's what they've been brainwashed into believing. Wow. That if these women aren't separated, they'll just come and attack you and and want that dick. Maybe that is the case though when you keep them separated. If you keep them from men all the time when they finally get around men, maybe they just jump on dick like a hero on the

23:24guys are a little too friendly with each other as far as I'm concerned. Gay stuff. Yeah, but I don't even think they recognize it as homosexual cuz they're like they're not attracted to men. just they get horny and they just start jerking each other off. I don't know that for sure, but you know, I could see that as as a possibility. If you're just around dudes all the time, just repressed. Well, I know dudes who've been in the military who've done tours and they they go overseas to the Middle East and they say that guys young boys all the time. That's weird to me. Well, you think that that's a like a a consequence of the separation between the men and the women? Yeah, I guess. I I don't know what it is. It's weird to me. Yeah. But when I did the show, I played right down the aisle. I stood where the aisle was. When I was on stage, I stood where the aisle was so

24:12that I didn't really pick a side. Did you turn like a sprinkler? Yeah, I did. I kept turning like that. Yep. Like I was just trying to water half the lawn. Now, when you do shows like that, do you ever worry about doing something that can get you in trouble? Um, it's not so much that I worry about doing stuff that'll get me in trouble. It's doing stuff that they may deem as offensive because I know what is offensive and then then you got to worry about people's sensitivities. So, I'll always ask the promoter like straight up. I'm like, "What can't I talk about?" Um, and they're like, "No religion. Don't mention the royal family and uh try to keep sex to a minimum." I'm like, "All right. Wow. No religion. Can't you just mock Mormons? Can't you make fun of Mormons?" You probably could. Yeah. They wouldn't give a They would again wouldn't know what a Mormon was. They would think it

25:01was a sect. Really? No, I don't know. I'm sure they wouldn't know what a Mormon is. Mormon's very specific to this part of the world. Wasn't it created here? Yeah. Yeah, it was created in Well, they they they took over Utah essentially. What's interesting Do you perform in Utah a lot? Uh once or twice. Not very often. It's really interesting. Great club. It's great. Yeah. Yeah. Well, the Wise Guys in Salt Lake, they have two of them now, right? They have a larger one. They had the original one. I think they opened a larger one. the one down from the mall. I don't remember the address, but but um they have it's Utah's interesting because you have like these Mormons, but you have a lot of like really cool people that are sick of the Mormons Yeah. And they surround them, too. But then it's Mormons. I mean, it's a wacky cult, right? It's very bizarre, but they're

25:49really nice. They're like some of the nicest cult members ever. Yeah. It's it's a it's a it's a tough line to to walk because you're not I'm not sure what their deal is. You're not sure if they're trying to convert you. But then I as a brown guy, I'm like, well, they only just started letting us believe their about 20 years ago, right? Then they only let black people in like 20 years ago. Is that what happened? I didn't even know there's any black Mormons. There's got to be like a clan of black Mormons. Please find that, Jamie. Yeah. There's got to be some sort of a group where they get together. They're called More Than Men's. Jesus Christ. Can't all be good jokes. Let's pretend that didn't happen. But they have a great spot. Like they Salt Lake City is goddamn gorgeous. You know, they got the mountains there. It is nice. Air is nice up there. Yeah. I

26:37love Utah. I walked a lot when I was there. I would walk from the hotel to the gig. Why? Why not? Okay. It was nice. Nice air. Needed the exercise. Yeah. Salt Lake City is a it's a it's just it's weird when you associate a place with something like San Francisco used to be gay. Yeah. So you the gays can't afford it anymore. Yeah. It's not really gay anymore. Yeah. They they outpriced the gays. Yeah. They did. They did. They did. They did. They moved. I mean, there definitely some rich gay folk out there, but as far as like having a community of specific people, it's more tech millionaires and It's a lot of that. a lot of uh there's a lot of and there's a lot of old money there too. You know, people that have just been there forever. There's that. But as far as like the amount that things cost in San Francisco, it's the most obscene I've ever seen in terms of like real

27:31estate and what it costs to buy a house. Yeah. Because if you want to be in the city, right? Yeah. Yeah. But that's pretty much any city. If you want to be in it, it's going to cost you a lot more. It'll cost you a lot more, but you can live in West Hollywood. New York's insanity. But you could live in West Hollywood and it kind of makes sense. But, you know, you can rent in West Hollywood. It's hard to own in West Hollywood because Yeah. I feel like everything's been purchased by somebody and they just rent everything out. Huh. At absorb extremely high rent. Yeah, I guess that makes sense. But there's stuff for sale there. But it just does. It's California is so strange because of the earthquakes. Everything's all spread out. Like nothing's stacked on top of each other. I mean, you have downtown, but downtown's so rare. It's downtown's so new. Yeah. Well, it is now. It's come

28:18becoming new again. Yeah. And they're they're And real estate downtown is very expensive now, too. I remember when they started doing it about 10 years ago, it was cheap, and now you're like, "Wow, it's like almost like New York pricing." Yeah. They're turning it into an actual real city. Johnny Depp is selling some Were you telling me about that? What's he selling? Johnny Depp is some selling some preposterous chunk of real estate there where he's got like five floors and some gigantic Well, you know, he's getting divorced. Yeah. So, he's got to start dumping The kid's getting He's getting Yeah. He's going to have to give up a ton of cash. That dummy didn't even get a prenuptual. At least I got a prenup this time. Good for you. Yeah, this time. This time? First time? No. First time? No. But I was only married for 14 months, so it didn't matter. They they can't you

29:04if you're only married for 14 months. No. Look at this. Johnny for seven months. Just listed his five Los Angeles pen houses for 12.78 million. He's got five of them. He just sold one of them. I said 12.7 each or in total? Total for all five. Oh, that's not too bad then. No, that's not bad. They were all stacked. I thought it was just They are They're all It's like the top couple floors of one of those buildings. It's all five units. It's all Yeah. Yeah. What is he doing buying all this stuff? They look pretty cool. I think you guys buy all that stuff cuz the money starts flowing in. He said, "Whoa, he's got some baller houses." Holy Yeah, that's some cool Wow, that is amazing. What a cool looking place. Three of them are connected. The other two, I guess, are separate. Oh, I see. So, he's selling those two and the other three. But the problem with apartment

29:50living is, man, you wind up paying all that money and then the neighbor right next door has a party. Yeah. And you listen to his That's probably why he bought all those so that way he was his own neighbor. Yeah, that's a good move. But you're still And also then if you're in downtown LA, one day the earth is going to shake. Yep. And that building you're in is going to be useless. You're not going to be able to fix that thing. It's going to break. There's going to be structural issues. They're going to have to vacate the entire thing and you're going to get out of all your hard-earned cash, all that Jack Sparrow money. Well, he's getting out of it anyway. His earth is shaking already. But she's hooked up with Elon Musk. Has she? Really? Yeah. Maybe she'll uh leave him alone. Maybe she'll uh cut him some slack. I don't know. She was with Elon Musk now. Yeah. I thought Elon was

30:44smarter than that. No, you would think the guy's a genius. He's a He's a thinker. Think I think he's a forward thinker. I think he likes Yeah, we all like Well, he was dating he was married to some actress before that and apparently didn't have a prenuptual with her. Oh, that's terrible. Billionaire and the babe Elon Musk relentlessly pursued and was infatuated with Amber Heard, sending repeated emails requesting to meet the actress. Okay. I don't like the way that's phrased because that's the work of some Yeah, it sounds like he wanted to grab her Who wrote that? Is that a girl? A girl or a guy wrote that? Uh, says Chris, so it could be either. Yeah, right. I like how you did that. It was written by Pat. Remember it's Pat. You couldn't do that today. If you did that today, they would call you transphobic. Yep. You're there's every phobic now. She's not

31:39gender binary or Z's not gender binary. There's uh from your part of town, University of Toronto, there's this uh embattled professor who's uh he's like standing his ground against political correctness in in in in Toronto. And the kids are going crazy. They're trying to get him removed. He just refuses to use the 28 different gender pronouns. He refuses to let people choose what gender pronoun they want to be called. He's like, "No, I'm going to call men men. I'm going to call women women." Like, this is ridiculous. And this is censorship. Like you're trying to change people's behavior. Yeah. The pro here's the problem is that people now with with all these free this new liberty um they're just choosing to do things as opposed to actually being a certain way. And I saw this story about this uh kid Gavin something or another uh I think it's in North Carolina if I'm not

32:36mistaken and uh and was born a girl. But when you see it, he's a a 14 or 15 year old now and he identifies as a male. And when you see it, you're like, "Oh, yeah, he's a boy." There's there's no reason for me to not believe that this is the right way for this person to be. But it should be case to case. You know what I mean? It shouldn't be. You can't just blanket statement, oh, whatever you want to be, you can be. No, that. You It has to be genuine. You can't just do it because that's the thing to do right now. It does have to be genuine. But when you open it up like that, then it gives people who legitimately feel like they're in the wrong gender, it gives them the opportunity to express themselves in a different gender. What's up is that you're born a boy and you're a boy. All right? You're born a girl, you're a girl. But if you're born a girl and you feel like

33:23you're a boy, you're never really going to be a boy, you know? So if I call you a boy and you take a bunch of hormones and everything, you're still not a boy. What would be nice and what's probably eventually going to happen, there's going to be a way that they can change your sex. Like literally change your sex. There's going to be some way where they interfere with your DNA. They get in there and Russell Peters becomes Russellina Peters. Yeah. It's a little a little uh a little hacking on your system there. If you were a girl, what would you change your name to? Rose. I like it. I think I still want to be RP. Beautiful. You'd be beautiful. You'd be like a flower. I'd be a beautiful flower. Russell rose petals. I would be tulip. I'd be tulip Rogan. I've always wanted to be a tulip. I feel like they're an underappreciated flower. You don't want to be a rose

34:09because rose is like the king of the flowers. Like it's a lot of pressure. Um but then you don't want to be orchid cuz that's the more expensive. Orchid's more expensive than roses. Yeah. yeah. They're very expensive. Really? Yeah. How do you know this? Uh cuz my fiance loves orchids. Oh. And but the good thing with those is you buy one and they last for a long time. You can keep those alive. Really? How's that? Uh, the way they are, you wrap them around a stick and they just keep growing. Oh, okay. So, when you buy them, are they in dirt? Yeah, you get them in dirt and Okay. So, roses, you buy them and they're in a bush so they're cut and Yeah. They die quick. Yeah. Yeah. It's like that life support system thing they do where they put it in water. Like, hey, keep the roses in water to keep them fresh. They're dead. Kill them. Should we pull the plug on these roses

34:53yet? You know what I found out recently? We were talking about this the other day that you can take the stem of one plant and plant it on another plant. Like I was at this ranch and they had pistachio trees and the arms of the pistachio trees are grafted onto an avocado tree. So that stem cell. No, it's not. You just tried to make a pun out of it. I did. I did. Son of a That can't all be good, Joe. You got to spit them out so that way they get out there and you find out if they're good or not. But you can't take a rose like when someone gives you a rose that's been cut. You can't make that thing stay alive, can you? Uh, can you plant it in dirt? No. No. It needs roots, right? It needs the roots. It's not going to grow roots, right? It can't I don't think it can grow roots. It's over. I think the the the top of the the bud the uh can can flourish still. The flower Yeah, the

35:41flower itself can still can do what? It can still flourish for a little while, but the body is dead basically. You know, the stem's dead. Yeah, the stem's dead. So, but you can't take the flower and some But it dies like, you know, in increments. It's It's dead from the from the cut point, I would imagine. Oh, is that what it is? I I don't know. I I'm I'm assuming it would be dead from the cut point and then it just slowly dies its way up. H that that makes sense, right? Oh, you can? Yeah. So, I'm an idiot. No, you can regrow a rose once you cut it off the stem. For real. I'm just not a horiculturalist. Well, it's it's interesting to watch people who know flowers. They know what to trim and what not to trim. They're constantly like cutting pieces off of it. That's why they do what they do and we just pay them to do that. Yeah. Okay. I have nothing. I got nothing for

36:29that. What's up? There's even You can use it doing it using potatoes to Oh, I've seen that before. Oh Yeah. So, you take the stem, you stick it in a potato, and what does a potato do? It probably helps give it a root base, I would imagine. I'm just I'm making a guess. Can people hear you right now on that? Yeah. I mean, you guys can't hear me because you don't have headphones on. But they won't do that in LA because people tend to avoid potatoes and carbs. So, they do now. It's the newest thing. Have you been on that yet? What? Avoiding carbs. No, clearly. Look at me. I look like I've avoided a car. You don't give a do you? I do. I just like food. I do too. I give myself cheat days. Yeah. When I had when I I was for the uh special, I had hired Alex Arza to train me. Alex Arza, the guy who trained Pacquiao. Yeah. Really? I hired him for that. Did he get you on

37:18steroids? No, no, no, he didn't. Isn't he famous for that? That's what everybody thinks he does, but I I I didn't see it. I He just works you incredibly hard. Like, yeah. Yeah. And I was like, Alex, you know I don't have a fight coming up, right? Like literally, I'm not exaggerating when I tell you this. I I would spar 12 rounds boxing and then 12 12 with 30 second breaks and Yeah. And then after that, an hour and a half of core. Come on. Oh my god, I'm dying. And I would literally get home and just be in bed for the rest of the day. That was it. So all that core stuff that Pacquiao does, do you think you got all that from him? I would imagine so. Cuz I was always wondering, I was like, I've never seen a fighter work more on their core than Pacquiao. He was telling me though that uh that Pacquiao was addicted to that though. He would have to tell Pacquiao,

38:08don't do sit-ups today. Why? Cuz you know, you take a day off, let your muscles rest. And he was like, no. He would just catch him just doing them all the time. And he would do like a thousand sit-ups. Something stupid. I was He said I couldn't get him to stop doing sit-ups. He couldn't stop. He was addicted to doing sit-ups. That's so bizarre. That's the one thing that most people hate. Yeah. I I I hated uh these weird planking things he made me do. I hated them. Oh, like on your elbows? Not even on my elbows. On the medicine ball, the half ball, you know, he'd turn it upside down and I would I would h be on that and then my feet would be on a medicine ball. So I'd be at that angle, you know, struggling the whole time and he just make you stand there. Yeah. 30 sec 10 seconds, 15 seconds. It's a long time. Now, how'd you get in in touch with that guy? Uh from, you know, Ellie Sekback.

38:58No, does ES News. He's a boxing kid. He Oh, I know the name. Yeah, he uh put me in touch with him. That's a weird guy to get as a trainer, though, isn't it? Cuz I wanted to get what the problem was. I wanted to get skinny. I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to get small, right? But he's a, you know, Alex is one of those guys who's like, "Fuck, no, I want to make sure you're fit and you're in shape." And I'm like, "Dude, I just got I looked the same, but my like I was more fit." Do you know what I mean? Like my But you hadn't lost any weight. No, I I lost uh fat percentage and gained muscle mass, but that's not what I wanted. I'm I don't have a fight coming up. I just wanted to get skinny. I lost him. Yeah. Give me AIDS if I have to. Did you really say that? How dare you? right now. Easy E is spinning in his grave. Well, you know, do you think he really had AIDS? Uh, it would it would

39:47it would appear so. I don't think anybody would want to fake that one. I mean, usually now when somebody dies of AIDS and they don't want to say it, they just say he had pneumonia. Well, how few heterosexual people got AIDS? That's what's interesting. You know, that's true. It is a difficult way to get it. Yeah. Like if Will Chamberlain didn't get AIDS, how does anybody have AIDS? Yeah. Right. And Magic Johnson and all the Well, he did. Yeah. Yeah, you got the the HIV, but apparently he's he reads clear now. That's what the word on the street is that his tests are. Yeah, I don't understand that. Um, apparently you can get HIV to such a level that your body doesn't detect it. Yeah, it's all very confusing. Diseases are very confusing. Commenting on any of that stuff, like where's the AIDS? Where'd it go? Come on. Everybody thought by the time this 2016 rolled around, we'd all

40:35be dead. We'd all have AIDS. or I'll be dead, right? Yeah. And then Chris Rock did the joke 20 years ago. Remember what was that joke? My AIDS is acting up. It's He said AIDS is just going to get to a point where it's just manageable with medication is Oh, that's right. And it's basically where we're at right now. Well, it's even crazier than manageable. It's non-existent. Do you remember when Sam Kenisonson had that bit about it? Sam Kenisonson had like the most controversial bit. He's like, Sam, they say it's a it's a it's a communicable disease. Heterosexuals can die from it, too. He goes, "Name one. Name one guy. Name one because it's not our dance. Remember he had that thing about Rock Hudson? Oh, I remember that. You know, Rock Hudson had to be on his deathbed going, "It was that last dick. It was that last dick. Why did I suck it? Why did I suck it?

41:21Millions of dicks. Nothing ever went wrong. Dick, dick, dick. Suck, suck, suck. It was that last dick. Oh. Oh, that guy, man. That's a guy that you can't imitate. That's a that's a that's a real revolution in comedy. There's only been like a few like real revolutions. There's a Yeah, there's that distinct voice that people get, right? There's the mellow guys, then there's the uh and then there's if anybody does try to go that route, it's always trying to do Sam and now there's the people that want to be Mitch and then there's the uh people that want to be Bill or Louie. The Bill one was awesome because there was so many people that were trying to be like Hicks. There was uh there was so many there's so many like Hicks clones especially after he died and everybody's like I'm gonna pick up the mantle. I'm gonna be that tortured road warrior who writes poems. Yeah. See to me Hicks

42:15always read to me as a angry dorky guy. Angry nerd. That's how I always saw him. Right. Yeah. I never looked at him go that guy's so cool. Sam I looked at him and go that guy's kind of cool. He's very rock and roll you know. Well what's hilarious is Ari Shafir like challenges people. He goes he wasn't funny. He goes, "Show me one joke where Hicks was funny." And people get crazy. They get so mad. They attack him. They go after him. He's like, "Yeah, good point. He made a good point, but not funny." Next. Yeah, I I'm I'm with Ari on this. I was never a Hicks fan, but I'm a Hicks fan. I'm a Hicks fan. Always will be. I'm I'm a fan of what he did. Like the the style of It was very fascinating to me to watch, but he definitely wasn't the most hilarious guy. It wasn't like Joey Diaz, like you watch him and you can't stop laughing. You're just crying. I think Kindler is a

43:03better version of Hicks. Kindler, how how so? I mean, Kindler's got that sharpness to him and but he's a lot of sticky stuff and he does some sticky stuff, but you almost know he's doing it on purpose. Oh, he definitely is. Yeah. So, but again, he's also one of those guys that only comics know about or love. Yeah, that's weird. Those the I always felt like Kindler would catch on. He you know wasn't he on he was on somebody's sitcom for a minute was he? Yeah. What sitcom did Kindler and you thinking about Patton? No Pat was on a sitcom. Patton was on Kevin James sitcom he was I think Andy Kendler dropped in on that every now and then too. Did he? Or was it Drew Car's one of them? Do you got that info? Bob's Burgers. What's Bob's Burgers cartoon? I did a voice on Bob's Burgers once. He's on Marin. He's on Marin. Yeah, he's on Marin as a guest every now and then or for three seasons.

43:58Oh, was he on anything else? Comedy Bang Bang. Comedy Bang Bang. What is that? That's um Reggie Watts's thing, wasn't it? Yeah. Scott, I think Reggie Watts is on that new show where he's the band guy for was it James Cordon? Yeah. Yeah. Have you watched that show? I haven't. No. Good for you. Stay away from that TV. Go read a book. Everybody loves Raymond. That's what I want to say. Oh, he was. Oh, okay. Everybody loves Raymond. The sitcom is the sitcom dead. The sitcom is dead as we know it, I think. Yeah, it seems like it. Well, the the uh the traditional sitcom is dead. Do you sit around thinking about things you can do or do you just I do all the time. Yeah, I think about all the time. Ruben Paul and I have an idea for a show, but we don't know which way to go. That's the thing. Why don't you say it on the air so someone could steal it? Yeah, I know. That's why I'm not saying it.

44:56Well, it's my life, so you can't steal my life. You could try. I know. Aiz and Sar start gaining weight. You son of a How dare you? I'm out of here. I went there, I don't give a I'm smoking a joint even though you don't smoke pot. How come you don't smoke pot? What's that about? Uh, I didn't like the way I felt on it. I didn't like I didn't like feeling slow. Makes you feel slow. Yeah. How's like just dopey? I felt like like too mellow, which I didn't want to feel. Are you sure you're smoking the right I mean, I you know, this was the this was this was the '9s when I tried it. The ' 90s? The '9s. They hadn't figured out sativa yet. No, maybe they did. People did. They did figure it out. No, back then. Back then it was either uh you either had uh CES or Oh yeah, that's right. Or or or uh or OG Kush Chronic. Not even. I was in Toronto, so it was like either Jamaican stuff or the

45:59hydro stuff. What about edibles? That's what me up. Oh, you went I did an edible 11 or 12 years ago. Yeah, one of those little two bite brownies, but I did not know you're supposed to only have one bite. Oh, that's that's up more people. Like eating too much edibles has up more people with pot than probably anything ever. Yeah. I ate the whole brownie. Yeah. And wanted to die. I'm sure you've seen the 9/11 video that was on uh YouTube of the cops that called 9/11 because uh there was uh a guy they pulled over. He had some pot. They stole the pot from him and made brownies with it and ate the brownies and thought the brownies were poisoned and thought they were dying. Thought they were dead. Like time's moving really slow. You ever seen that? No. Oh, fire that up, Jamie. Find that, please. It's It's hilarious. It's hilarious cuz it's what happens. Like marijuana, I've said this before,

46:58so please forgive me if you've heard this and you're listening. Marijuana when you eat it, it's processed by your liver and it produces something called 11 hydroxy metabolite that's five times more psychoactive than THC, right? So there's THC which you get when you smoke it and then when you eat it, it's a totally different drug. And so when people go, "Oh my god, this is not pot. Something's in this." No, that's pot when you eat it. Pot when you eat it is like a totally different dimension. You open a different door. You go down a different hallway. You're in a different building. You're like, "This is not pot." No, it's pot. That's pot when you eat it. I was stuck to the bed literally like laying in a, you know, spread eagle. Oh, the 911 call for the cops. The cops called 911 for the It's a classic. And I was cling I was literally my nails were Yeah. I I thought I was

47:48going to like the bed was going to fly. Yeah, I've been there, dude. And I I was All I could do is mumble. I couldn't even muster words out of my mouth. My tongue was dead. It was. It's my favorite way to be. Oh, it scared the out of me. What I like about being there is that you always come back. Like, you really think you're going to die, but you always come back and you're always fine. And you come back. Here, listen to this. Police and rescue uh to pot brownie over. I think I'm having an overdose of as my wife. Okay. You and your wife? Yes. Overdose of what? Marijuana, but I don't know if it had something in it. Okay. Can you please send rescue? Okay. How old are you? I'm 28 29 years old and my wife is uh 26. Please come. 26? Yes, please. Have you guys been drinking also? What? Have you guys been drinking today, too? No, that's it. No. And is there any weapons in the house? No.

48:46Please come. Okay, we're on our way. You guys are you guys like Do you guys have fever or anything? No, I'm just I think we're dying. Okay. How much did you guys have? Uh I I don't know. We made brownies and I think we're dead. I really do. Okay. How much did you put in the brownies? I don't know. I I Was it a bag? Who made the brownies? I um My wife and I did. Cuba, come here. Okay. Get her. She's on the She's on the living room ground right now. Is she breathing on the ground? Barely breathing. Is she awake? She I think so. Okay. Can you look? Pardon? Can you look? Can you look to see if she's alive? She's laying right down in front of me. Time is going by really, really, really, really slow. Okay. Well, I'm on the phone with you and you don't Do you Do you know how much of it you bought and put in the brownies? Pardon? How much did you buy? I don't I did the

49:40police and rescue. They're on the way, but I'm trying to figure out how much you bought and put into the brownies. Sir, probably like a quarter ounce total. A quarter ounce total into the brownies. Did you guys eat all the brownies? Yeah, we did. Okay. Um, but how many was it a big batch? A little batch? It was It was a quarter ounce. Okay. But brownie wise, how many pieces do you guys think you guys had? I I don't know. My I probably had like a small chunk. Please come. It's What time is it? It's 9:37. When did you guys last eat the brownies? Probably like an hour and a half ago. Okay. Is your wife still Is your wife still breathing? Yeah, she is. She's sitting. She's kneeling down in front of me. She's moving. Okay. I know. We have to wait. Okay. And is she Stacy Sanchez? Yes. What's your name? My name is Edward. You're Edward Sanchez. Okay. And did you guys have any other We

50:39get it. It goes on for a while. But what's hilarious is the lady who um who answered the phone, she didn't even bother. Like she didn't rush. She knew they were fine cuz she was sober. Like that's my favorite thing. She just keeps asking questions. Like if that was a gunshot wound, would she be asking so many questions? Where are you? Yeah. If somebody like blacked out, they think they had a heart attack. Shouldn't be asking so many questions. But these pot dummies, one of my friends had one a couple years ago when he came out here to see us. He had a cookie and when it hit him, he he turned so pasty white. And uh and he he thought he was dying. He was like and he same same exact same reaction. I even called my doctor for him because, you know, I'm like, "Anything I could do?" He goes, "Nope, just tell him to relax. He's gonna It's got to wear off, that's all.

51:28Go drink some water." You You really feel like you're done, though. You really do. You really feel like, man, I really up. Yeah. Like, this is It's over. Yeah, he was done. What'd you get back? So, what should I try? You shouldn't try anything if you don't want to. I mean, you're a happy guy. I'm a happy guy. I would not look at you and say Russell Peters needs anything in his life other than what he's doing. I enjoy me some tequila. I do too. Yeah. It's just the health consequences of that stuff are just so different than that what happens with pot. What happens with pot is drum roll. Nothing. That's it. Nothing. You get high as the next day. You go to the gym, you feel great. Like there's no health consequences. If I get drunk and I've been drunk, I feel like the next day, man. I just feel like But what are you drinking? Anything. If you If I drink too much

52:19wine, I feel like the next day. If I drink too much whiskey, I feel like the next day. If I drink too much beer, I feel like the next day. I work out, I could feel it. I feel like weakened. You know, tequila, I feel fine the next day. You're a maniac. That's all. But that's all I just drink. Drink it straight. Whoa. That's a terrible advice. You don't have to He's giving this terrible advice. The thing is you don't have to have like you know 10 of them. You just have, you know, I have maybe two. Mhm. glasses. I sip them all night. Brian buzz takes a shot before every show. He does one shot before every show. That seems like a damn good idea. It's not a bad idea cuz your body really doesn't have a hard time processing one shot of whiskey. Like one shot of whiskey is like no big deal. It's when you go like three, four, you have a beer, you have margarita.

53:07I don't I don't mess around like that. It's just straight tequila. I'm a huge Hunter S. Thompson fan. And um one of the saddest things to me is watching Thompson from the time he was a really young man when you know he first started making it as a journalist and a writer to the way he was as he got older. And I think a big big part of it was the alcohol. Like he just drank so much booze that at the end he was almost incoherent. He would go on Letterman and Conan O'Brien and you barely understood what he was saying and you just saw it. It's like that stuff will get you. You know who always sounded drunk was Hitchens. Yes. Well, he was drunk a lot. He did all sound drunk. He was drunk a lot and he smoked cigarettes as well, which is just so unfortunate for such a brilliant guy. Yeah. You know, he did smoke cigarettes, right? He sounded like he did. Doug Stan, what does it

53:59say? Did you ever see him uh his booze suit he had when he got on the cruise? No. He snuck on all this uh on all this alcohol. Smuggle booze on the cruise ship. He's wearing I don't know liters of whiskey and vodka and mixers in those things. Yeah, he had it all like in bladders and tucked into small plastic bags. Stan hopes so skinny now cuz you can't take the stuff on a cruise ship. I guess I've never been on one. That's hilarious. Actually, you can. That's because they want you to buy their boos. Is that what it is? Yeah, but they always have booze on board. They do. So, look at this. He's got a suit on. Oh my god. With bags of whiskey. This is so ridiculous. He got tucked. It's like someone in like a movie when they're making jokes about like, "Give me all your guns." And they have them tucked everywhere. Oh my god. This is so ridiculous. But he's ruining it for

54:47everyone now. Oh, he's got it in his dick. He's got a tequila tucked into his jock strap. Are you playing this? The volume of this vodka. Oh my god. This is insane. Hilarious. He had it in his socks. A flaskman. Oh my god. Flask. It's enough for a party of like 25 people probably. Not for 25 Stan hopes though. That's the difference. I love him. That's what he looked like. Ready for our uh Norwegian Cruise Lines impractical joker. Hilarious. Drop. Smuggled alcohol. Drop trout. I'm not I don't want to drop. Drop trout. She's just yelling his pants down. We're I should announce this. We're doing an end of the world election night um comedy podcast from the comedy store. Uh and it's going to be Stanh Hope and myself and uh Fitz Simmons is going to do it. And we're probably going to have some other people too. And maybe Russell Peters if he's in town. yeah, What's the date? Whatever the

55:51election day is. Is that the 3rd? Might be the 7th. Seventh. The election's on the 8th. Supposed to be the day before. Let's see. Monday. Oh god. This election is weird, man. It's a It's a good time to be American, guys. This is a weird one. This is a weird one because like um I actually so many people just want to see it play out. Somebody tweeted, I forgot who it was, but it was hilarious. They said, "I can't wait for the to see the uh series finale of of America." Wow. It really almost feels like it. You know, you're going to vote, right? Yeah, I guess. I'm gonna vote for Gary Johnson, I think, even though he doesn't know what Aleppo is. You know, when you know, even though you know, here's the thing. When I heard him ask when they when I heard them ask him that question, it sounded like they wanted to know what he thought about something called Aleppo. Oh, what do you think about

56:45Aleppo? I think he said, "What are you going to do about Aleppo? What are you going to do about Aleppo?" And he was like, "I'm sorry." Like, I think the question just confused him. Well, it's um it's a really important thing to know if you want to be a I mean, what has he been doing, right? He's running for president now. That takes up all of his time. But how much was he doing when he was the governor of New Mexico as far as like paying attention to world issues? I don't know how much you have to know more than a regular person, right? It's always weird that, you know, we get these uh these people running for president that are from like states where you're like, do they think about the rest of the world there, right? You know, Arkansas and New Mexico. Yeah. Well, some I think more people do now than ever before. more people definitely think about the rest of the world now

57:34than they did say uh 20 or 30 years ago just because we're we're in contact with people more, you know, and the internet's given people more ideas, more things to look up, more things to think about, but man, not knowing Aleppo, you got to know Aleppo. You know, you know what's funny is I I didn't know it. I didn't know it at the time. I didn't know it. I knew that there was tremendous issues in Syria, but I didn't know what the name of the city was. It sounded like a nickname for something, you know. Aleppo. And then I, you know, being Indian, I was like, "Oh, I must ask." There was the other one, though, where he uh didn't know any world leaders. Yeah, that's a problem. That's a big problem. That's That's a bigger problem than not knowing Aleppo. Yeah. You got to be careful there, dude. Yeah. You got to have some people that you admire. Yeah. But I think look up to somebody in

58:24your business. Yeah, I think he said Angela Markell, right? Is that what he said? I don't even think he I think his vice president threw that out for him. Yeah, but that woman is Who's running for as his Who's his running mate? Some other dude. Bill Weld, former governor of Massachusetts. Weld. Oh, Bill W. Oh, that's his uh vice president. I should know that. I've almost like given up. It's like I'm a Cubs fan. It's like they're not going to win. They're not going to win. They're not going to You know what I mean? They might win this year. They might. And I heard Bob Newart's all excited. He's 87. He said he he's too old for this I love Bob. But those Cubs fans, man, they hang in there no matter what. I got to support Toronto, you know? It's my city. I understand. Even though I don't know a damn thing about baseball, but doesn't this seem like a It seems like a

59:10ridiculous sporting event. It really almost does. It's almost like an who who can I demean and insult more to diminish them more contest. Like if you really thought like that about like part of it is like they go for the worst aspects of each other and they try to like do it on live TV. It's an ugly precedent to set for the country, you know, especially, you know, when they try to justify it, I think, by looking at the rest of the world when they have elections and how they get really violent in all these other parts of the world. And, you know, you remember when some leaders, I forget what countries it is, but somewhere in Europe, the leaders get into fights with each other at the in their uh in their government offices. Oh, yeah. They have crazy gang fights. Yeah. There's one in some parliament or something like that. Was it in China? Was it in China

60:01or it might have been China or Korea? I think it was Korea cuz I I saw the guy throw a kick. Oh, I think so. And they went nuts on each other. Started And then there was one in Ukraine, remember? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And Ukraine's not the place you want to do it. And what if you know Vitali Klitschko is running you're running against him. You know, Ukraine people are they're cut from a different cloth. All those people from that part of the world are so there's something like extra strong about them, you know, the the the just the the robustness of the people. They're uh survivors. yeah, man. It's cold as up there. Cold as And they were they were oppressed for so many years. Yeah. If you could take some dude who lives in Siberia, some man and his wife from Siberia. Look at Rustlan Pvnikov. He's from Siberia. Yeah. Yeah. He may not be the best at it, but he sure is the toughest at it.

60:52Well, uh, wasn't Carellin from Siberia as well? Alexander Carellin, the wrestler? I could not confirm nor deny this. Do you know who that is? I do not, dude. Maybe the scariest guy of all time in the history of Russian athletes. There's one guy who stands out. The only wrestling match he lost in the Olympics was to Rulon Gardner. I think that was the only in his entire amateur career. And I I might be wrong about that, but I know he lost to him in the Olympics. And the only reason why he lost to him, it was like some new rule where if you separated the hands, it would be a point. It was the first time that was ever in the Olympics. So if you were because they're Greco Roman. Do they cable grip and Greco Roman? They do a bunch of but it's mostly upper body grappling and collar ties. They don't shoot doubles. It's like it's a different style of wrestling. And

61:42Carellan excelled at it cuz he was this freak specimen. but he's from Siberia, but he was like 6'3, 300 lb, just a ridiculous guy. And there's a picture of him hoisting this guy in the air. And I I have it in my gym. I just I stare at it all the time. Like, if I ever if I ever take myself seriously, this picture right here, if I ever want to know and really truly understand what a I am, I need I need to look at this picture of Carellin. He's gritting his teeth and he's hoisting this guy up in the air. Dude, no mouth guard. Look at the size of his quads. I mean, he he's a freak. Giant calves. He was a freak. And he ragdoll dudes. He How old is he now? Well, he's a he's a wrestling coach now. I believe if I had to guess, I would say he's probably 50. See how old I bet you Bellator will sign him, dude. He almost got to went to MMA in the 1990s. How old is he? 49. 49. um

62:44some close. Um he almost went into MMA in the 1990s. It might have been uh the early 2000s. I think he was thinking about doing it because I know there was some offers and he maybe I feel like he did some pro wrestling thing. I think he might have done some like fake wrestling thing like for money or something like that. But dude, he was a freak. Just a freak. And he would throw guys around in this really ridiculous way where they just they were like little children cuz he was a big giant dude. Like look at the size of that dude. But he was also really agile. Like he like these rolls that he could do these dives. He was like so gentle in a lot of his movements but freakishly strong. So he had achieved this spectacular balance of incredible technique but ridiculous freakish human athletic ability. So he had like the combination of those things. Like look at his technique. Like

63:43everything is perfect. But he's also tremendously strong. Like the Russian um wrestling coaching look on that guy's face. wrestling uh Russian wrestling is incredibly technical. Well, the just the the Eastern block countries like they have a super high level of wrestling technical um technical skill. Like uh that's one of the reasons why George St. Pierre is so good because he was training with these Russian nationals that came over and lived in Montreal. Like that's where St. Pierre learned how to wrestle. Yeah, he has a solid base, dude. He's incredible for a guy that is he coming back? I don't know. He keeps thinking about it and talking about it, but I think I'm sure you've heard the rumors. Yeah. Well, they're talking about like a super fight with Anderson. Yeah. I don't know. In Toronto, no one's told that to me. I've not heard that. I I feel I mean, I've heard it, but I've

64:32not heard it from a human. If I was in if I was George and I was thinking right now, I think George St. Pierre is I mean, there's only a small handful of people as famous in the world of MMA as a fighter as George St. Pierre. There's Connor who's the most famous. There's Rhonda who's right up there. Rhonda and Connor are almost interchangeable in my eyes as far as like how famous they are. Like maybe more Connor because he's famous worldwide. I don't know, man. It's super close. I think Rhonda affected her legacy by taking that year off. Well, that doesn't matter. She comes back in a with a storm. She beats Amanda Nunes and gets the belt. She's bigger than ever. It's a tough one. It's a very tough one. But if she does do it, she's bigger than ever. She's she's got that whatever it is that dynamic personality that people get attracted to. And there's something about her

65:18losing and maybe even losing like that that could even make it more attractive to some folks. You know, it's makes her more human, makes her more vulnerable. You know, one of the things that people didn't like about her was how confident and strong she was very invincible at the time. Well, and she was also like really aggressive about it with other girls. But yeah, you know, in her eyes, those girls were trying to take something from her. Well, she was the Mike Tyson of uh of of MMA. Yeah. That's the only way you get to be a champion is if you have that that insane belief in yourself, but when you lose the way she lost to Holly, which is, you know, a devastating knockout, it's always interesting to see how someone rebounds. Some people rebound, they become better. They they come back tougher and stronger. And so that's what we're hoping for. That's what you're hoping

66:02for. Well, that was Or some people come back, they fight smarter. That was George St. Pierre when George St. Pierre got uh beaten up by Matt Sarah. Matt Sarah clobbered him. Just clobbered him, clipped him, hurt him, got on top of him, mounted him, punched him in the face, made him tap. I mean, he beat the out of him. And George came back better than ever. He just regrouped. But George also didn't take a year off in between there. It's true. It's true. I don't know on TV. And you know, no. Listen, for sure. I just think she is a different person. You know, I love Rhonda, but I I I just I'm hoping, you know, for her for her. I'm a big fan of taking a long time off when you get knocked out. I get that. I understand that. I think it's real important. It's It is very important. However, what you do in that time and how you present yourself in that time is also important.

66:51Well, she didn't really do much. She kind of laid low, you know, which too low. Nah. Nah, I don't think so. I see your point, but I disagree. I think she can do whatever the she wants, you know. I mean, I don't know that it really affected her brand so much, but you sound like a marketing genius. That's what I'm just thinking. Dude, you should you should have a startup. We should have a startup together. Let's do it. What do you want to do? Weed for people who don't do weed. What do you think um is wrong with taking a year off? Like, nothing's wrong with taking a year off, but you know that Ellen interview where she was talking about contemplating suicide? Yeah, I forgot about that. I mean, I think those are the things that showed the mental makeup and that's where I think that's what's put the doubt in everybody's mind. Now, if I had to do a Brendan Shaw right now, I would

67:35say for sure don't do your first interview with Ellen on TV. Yeah. And cry. Yeah. I don't know, man. Like, I think I think those those TV formats, although I've done them and I enjoyed them, when you do those things, you can't you can't be yourself in seven minutes. It's not enough time, especially if they don't know you. And the people you're talking to don't know you. There's a giant crowd of people and there there's lights that say applause and everybody's ch there's a guy like Yeah, the clapping instead of laughing. Got a warm up guy walks around. Come on guys. We're coming back live. You guys are super excited. We're excited to have you. Thanks for all your enthusiasm. We really appreciate it. I'm just going to need it. Let's just 10 10% more folks. Come on. We can do this. Y take whatever you got and add 30 to it. Now Rhonda, tell us about your head trauma and all

68:26these huge I mean it's like it's bizarre. It's bizarre. It's a bizarre way to talk to people. I think what she should have done was talk to somebody in the fight game. It would have been it would have been received a little bit better because then she would have been speaking to somebody knowledgeable about Yeah. Well, you know what, man? She can do whatever she wants to do. I don't I don't know what was going on in her head during that time, but I don't think there's anything wrong with taking a year off, getting your head together, and she also had some injuries she had to take care of. Did you do you think she should have train changed her uh training camp? I don't know what she's doing, honestly. I'm sure she's still right back at Glendale Fight Club. Listen, whe whether or not that guy Edmond has had success with uh some of his some of his students or like what

69:12issues they've had, you can't deny that he's worked wonders with her hands. Like her her striking ability when she was warming up for that BCA fight and they were in uh Brazil, they were on the sand and they're doing these uh these pad drills together. She looked fantastic, right? You look at her when she first started striking. You look at it till now, that's a a big percentage of that is those two working together. So there's no denying there's some merit to what he does. Unquestionably, he's definitely helping her. You would have to examine the whole camp like a scientist. You'd have to sit down to do this, right? Like you got a a world class, world championship level racehorse in a woman like Ronda Rousey, right? Or any fighter for that matter. And but if you if you were the overseer, if you were someone who could say, "Okay, what is the best course of this

70:02thing?" Like, "How do you well, you have to address technical issues, you got to address psychological issues, you got to address comfort, nutrition, all these different things." You'd say, "Okay, technically, uh, what are we trying to achieve?" Victory, right? Like, what is her best options? Like, is she training with the best kind of sparring partners? And the thing is, you don't know. Like one person could do it one way and be super successful. Then everybody says, "Well, that's the way to do it. You don't spar and you only do drills and then you ride bikes." That's what Donald Cerrone's been doing. Or you could go the Eddie Alvarez route, right? Eddie Alvarez sparred like 150 rounds preparing for Hafel dos anos. So he went the other route. He just said, "We're going crazy. We're going to go old school crazy. We're going to go in there and brawl and just be completely

70:50prepared to doesn't continuously uh train without sparring, does he?" Yes. Yes. How long has he been doing that? Since the fight with Dos Anjos, he was talking about, he said, "You take too much punishment in the gym." He's like, "You're taking too much punishment in sparring." And he just, he had some issues where um I think he said he closed his eyes and his equilibrium was given out. He was falling. And he was like, "What the fuck?" He realized it was he found out later it was an inner ear issue. I think it was right. Like a like a vertigo type thing. Oh, it was a nose clogging one that had affected his inner ear. I think it was like an infection in some way. But um so he decided just let's just do drills. I know how to fight. Yeah. And he's had incredible results. So I think uh some other guys are doing that and the frequency that Cerrone fights at as

71:38well. He he can probably get by without doing that because he's in the ring enough where he doesn't need to be in the ring extra. I I think you're right. I think there's that too. It's like there's a comfortable balance and it's probably one of the reasons why he likes to fight so much. He's probably he's easily the most active fighter in the game. He definitely tries to be, but the problem also is like right now like setting up the right fight for a guy like him is probably not that easy, you know? I mean, because he's always ready. Well, he's always ready. And um but setting up a fight for him is like, you know, it's a high-profile fight, but it's also a dangerous fight. So, you got to say, okay, which who do you set him up with? Because after you see what he did to Rick's story, you go, "Holy shit." Like Donald at 170 is like some new thing. Yeah. He's a new thing. Like

72:23he's way healthier. It's just It kills me to think that guy was starving himself for all those years. He's a big dude. He's not small. But at 155, he just didn't have the durability. And at 170, god damn, he's looking good. It's amazing. It's a crazy sport, isn't it? You know, I love it. So, you know, and I I love being there at those things and and and and you know, when you get to know the fighters and stuff and you hear a little inside talk and it's always interesting, you know. I know it is, man. Cuz you you know, you realize when you when you meet them and you and you talk to them that they're just guys doing a job. They're not looking at it as I just want to be the toughest guy in the world. They're like, I got to get more money out of this. Well, there's definitely that aspect of it, but there's also the guys that just want to go in there and be the toughest guy in

73:11the world as well. Those are usually the new guys sometimes. Yeah. Yeah. The older guys are like, "Look, I already know I'm tough and everybody else knows I'm tough. Now I got to monetize this." Yeah. There's there's so many factors at play, you know, when it comes to fighting. There's genetics which play a giant role. There's a just there's certain guys that are just built better for it. They just got a lucky roll of the dice and they have better just the the design of their body is better. Their shape is better. It works better. They can hit you harder. Their jaw is bigger. They can take more punishment. They got genetics on their side. Yeah. There's always going to be guys like that. So, you're seeing guys like that now, but then you're seeing like the the mental aspect of it. How many guys have mental coaches now and hypnotists and It's such a weird game now, dude.

73:55I mean the any fight sport now is very different than it was you know in the 80s when I was training boxing there was no nutrition there was no there I would I think I might have said it before my coach get to the gym my coach would be like go run and I'm like I just want to box he's like no you got to go run and then I would be like all right he go I go where do I run to and he goes run up to you know Torbram and and and and seven and and come back and I'm like all right and right at that intersection was a McDonald's just a little it down. So, I would run to the McDonald's and get a milkshake and then I would walk back because I made sure I ran there as fast as I could to get a milkshake. I could walk back and then I would run. Found the issue in the last half so I would be sweating and I a little a little bit out of breath when I got there. What do you think about this

74:46Amanda Nunez Ronda Rousey fight? Amanda's a dude. She's a beast. She's badass. She's badass. I mean, I would feel more comfortable if she was coming back against Misha or even a rematch against Holly, but uh Amanda scares me, dude. Before um Holly knocked out Ronda, I had said that I just thought Holly Holm needed more fights in the UFC, like more people to know who she is. I'm like, I go and I think Amanda Nunez is the more dangerous fight because Amanda Nunes is a black belt in jiu-jitsu. Yep. And she hits hard, man. She looks like she hits like a dude. Yeah, she hits so much harder than most of the women in that division. She super aggressive. She's got shorter arms and she looks like she can crank. Mhm. You know, you know, um this whole Cyborg thing, you know, everybody wants Cyborg to fight uh in the UFC and you know, they're trying to set up a fight. I

75:34would like Cyborg to fight Nunz. Yeah, I was just thinking that like pack on some weight. See, the thing about Cyborg is she struggles to get to 40. Yeah. Like that it's a she's so drained. Is there a weight class above that? There should be. There should be a 145. Yeah. Or even they should just give her the title at 145. Who is denying that she's the toughest 145 pound woman on the planet? Who's denying that? Yeah. I think there's a ton of fights waiting to happen at 145, 150 even. Well, Invicta has a whole 145 lb division. A bunch of them were messaging me. They were tweeting at me after we were talking about Victa still around. Yeah, the UFC owns it. They do. They do. I think they or they own part of it or something or it's on fight pass or something along those lines. But um yeah, man, she's uh she's a a destroyer. You know, Cyborg is a destroyer. Yeah,

76:29she's so terrifying. Watch the way she attacks these chicks. Like that's the 145 lb world champion. And she looks like Mickey Roor. So I think she's a little prettier than Mickey Ror. Bro, you're being rude. I meant the lips. I can't take this. I can't take this. I'm going to tweet to her after and apologize. apologize now cuz I don't want kicking the out of me. But what's interesting is I I wonder if there's a 55. Is there a 55 lb division to be had? I think maybe one I'd go up to 148 150 at the most I would say. H I wonder cuz you know I think Cyborg's one of her coaches was saying that if um you really gave her the right division it would be 155. Like that would be the division where she would feel the the healthiest because I think she walks around at like 170 something probably. She's but she's all muscled, you know. It's not like she's not walking around

77:21like me. She's walking around all muscle. Yeah. She's yolked. Yeah. But um Amanda Nunez is not that big. She's not as big as her. No. So that would be, you know, wouldn't the be the wisest fight because Amanda Nunez is like a legitimate 135 pounder, but she's a 135 pounder that hits like a dude and she's very solidly built. She's very It's all It's all very compact. Did you see her fight with Cat Zingano? I did not. Do you see how ferocious Cat Zenano is? Cuz she had Cat Zingano hurt in the first round and she was getting beat up like real bad. The first round was real bad for Cat and uh she made it out of that round and she stopped her in either the second or the third. I can't really remember. See if you can remember that. Or you don't remember it. See if I want to say she stopped her in the third. But it was just this brutal exchange and she eventually beat Amanda Nunez.

78:20Katsangano also knocked out Misha Tate. People forget about that. Mhm. Katsangano is a beast. I've I What's that? Third round TK. third round TKO. So Cat stopped uh Amanda in third round. Yeah. But the first round, dude, she had to survive. She was getting beat the up. And that's all and that's all standup. Mhm. Well, I think she got cracked in the stand up and I think most of it was ground and pound on the ground if I remember correctly. But um Amanda's just as far as like her her punches from the outside, she's got amazing snap. Like she really knows how to be in the right position and she drops full like snapping punches on girls. Like she really turns she knows her distance. Oh dude, she she cracks people. She cracks Sarah McMahon. You see that fight? I did not. Dude, you know, a lot of times I catch I I I jump in somewhere right around three fights before the main

79:14event or two fights before the main event. So yeah, you're one of those cool guys. No, I watch the prelims and then I get up when I have to change a channel because I'm like, where did it go? How am I finding this? You know? Yeah. When you're there live though, do you go for the whole event? I do. I do get there very early. The live event is a different animal, right? Everybody should see a a UFC live once. I always try and get your attention, but I'm on the wrong side of the octagon. Just come over and grab me, man. Oh, they will stop me. Sir, you can't go this way. And I'm like, all right. Well, next time come with me. I'll hook it up. Um, but I see the seats. I see the seats you get for them. And I'm like, "Where are you?" And they're like, "Oh, I'm with Joe." And I'm like, "Fuck, that's a good seat. You could do that. We could do that. We'll hook it up. How about Toronto? You

79:54be there for that one?" What is it? December 10th. Um, something like that. I'm doing a show with Big Jay Ocherson. Oh, I love Jay at uh Massie Hall. Can I host it? yeah. That's it. Russell Peters, Big Jay, and me. You heard it here, folks. I'll host that. I'll host like December 9th or whatever it is the day before the UFC. Yeah. Tickets are not on sale yet. They'll be on sale like in a week. December. Yeah, that'll be fun, dude. The three of us. Well, that'll be a good old time. Hell yeah, that'll be real fun. Um, but what were we just talking about? Oh, the um Amanda Nunez Ronda Rousey fight. But if Ronda gets her to the ground, man, it could be get it could get super interesting. I would just like to see one tuneup fight. No, no tuneup fights. This is not This is not boxing. The UFC doesn't give tuneup fights. Oh, they don't. It's just mountain after

80:49mountain. You know what I will say though that the women have proven to have far more resilience than the men a lot of times. They're just their willingness to not tap and their willingness to to get in there. And I prefer to not compare them gender to gender because I'm not one of those people. So, I just want to let you know that. I just objectified them in my own way. I think I mean no no no need need to even compare them to the men. What I'll say is there's amazing athletes and amazing champions in both the men and the women's division legitimately legitimately now. Like there's there's no denying that there's world class talent, but there's also no denying that the highest levels of male talent there's a bigger pool. But that's natural because there's more men that are interested in competing in a male dominated sport. Yeah. But the women's side is growing and you're getting a lot

81:43of like really highlevel Muay Thai fighters like Valentino Chevchenko who's a multiple time world champion who comes over and now she's fighting and she just beat Holly Holm. She beat Holly Holm and she really like outclassed her with standup. Like that was a big aspect of that. That was that I did see that and that was that was a big shock for me. I thought Holly would outbox her. No, Valentina's nasty dude. She's got that beautiful check right hook and she's she's real sneaky with her leg kicks. She's got excellent timing. She's a really dangerous fighter for anybody in that division because if you can't take her to the ground, it's highly unlikely that you're going to stand with her and not get cracked. You're going to you're going to start getting real uh apprehensive about your movements cuz she throws that beautiful check right hook or at least she did with Holly. She

82:26counters well, dude. She's just real high level striker and if you can't get her to the ground and even if you can get to the ground like she's been working on her ground game and she's very strong. So there's Sue like that fight right there. Is she doing for a title shot though? Yes. Yeah. Yeah, she is. I'm sure she's fighting um Misha. No. Who the is she? She's fighting Misha. I think Misha's fighting somebody in Madison. No, Risha is fighting Michelle Pennington. Oh yeah. Raquel Pennington and Misha are fighting in New York. In New York City. Yeah. Raquel Pennington's another one. She doesn't get enough for respect. She's dangerous. Super aggressive. Really good timing. Really good timing with her hands. Are you doing those ones? Yeah. The Masquer Garden one for sure. MSG New York and New Year's Eve. Oh yeah. Yeah. Like for me like a fight like the Misha Tate Holly Holm fight.

83:18That's about as exciting a fight as you're ever going to see. Exciting fight. It's about as exciting a fight as you will ever see. And the fact that there was a round in there where not much was happening. A round or so where not much was happening. Holly was trying to avoid Misha and just was just striking on the outside. That made the ending even more spectacular. Like the lull in that actually made the fight better in the end because it looked like Holly was going to cruise to a victory. Mhm. Mhm. And out of nowhere and Misha dug deep. But uh one of my all-time favorite moments. Yep. And then Holly not did not she's like you. I'm not tapping. She went to throwing punches. Oh my god. And it looked like one of those puppets. You know the one. God gangster. So gangster the whole the whole the whole fight. So gangster. And that was on the same card where Nate Diaz beat

84:07Connor. I mean that was that was one of the main reasons why I decided to stay doing commentary that card cuz I was I was on the fence. I was like maybe I should just stop doing it and then just devote more time. Were you offered the Bisp Bing Hendo fight? No. I told him I'm not doing the ones that are overseas. Wow. Such a good fight. It was amazing. I enjoyed it. I watched it at home. I watched it here. Watch it here. We did a fight. Did part of you wish you could have been there to commentate that one? Nah. I mean, the fight companions are great, but I'm saying no. No. Um, I just think you would add Brian Stan's awesome. I think Brian Stan's great, but he takes a lot of from people that just don't like things that are different or they just pick a side or something like that. But I I love his com. I like I like Brian. I like Kenny. I like everybody doing it. But, you

84:51know, you're that thing. Yeah. But they could be that thing, too. You know who's really good is Dominic Cruz. Dominic Cruz is very good. Very good. Especially from the technical aspect. And so is Daniel Cormier. I do I do like both of them when they do it on for sure. Well, Cormier's also spent so much time doing the behind the desk stuff now that he's gotten real comfortable with with expressing himself in like poetic and interesting ways, you know, like his like when he's describing fights and fight. He gets hyped up about he's got great emotion to it. It's entertaining as well as he fighting Anthony soon. Yeah, he's fighting. Rumble rematch. That's an exciting fight. The Rumble man's coming. He's so scary. He is a very scary guy. Scary at at the fights in the audience and I smiled cuz I to acknowledge like, "Hey, man." And he he did not smile back. He's a bad

85:42That Rumble, but it wasn't like I hate you. It was just like you smiling at. No, he's a good guy, man. Rumble's a good guy. He's a very good I don't know him like that, but I gave him a smile and a nod and I got a It's almost like he's got different kind of bones. Like everybody else has bones that are He reminds me of Bruce Seldon the way he looks. No. Yeah. Look like his fa I don't know why. I just look at him and I I always picture Bruce Seldon. That's weird. Maybe was kind of a bum. No, absolutely. You know, I'm a racist. Of course I am. I hate everybody. No. Well, Rumble is a unique specimen. It's just so hard to believe that he was a 170 pounder for so long and was killing himself to make that 170, goes up to 205 and is one of the scariest guys ever. Yeah, he's one of the scariest guys of all time. I don't even know how he made 170. How the did

86:34he make 170? I don't know. That That's a young man's thing. There's Anthony. Yeah, he doesn't look anything like Bruce. Get a shot of Bruce Seldon. Let's see. Maybe not that picture. Not at all. There's a picture of Bruce Seldon where Yo, I'm not kidding. There's a picture There's a picture of Bruce Seldon where he looks really dark and that's not it. Look. Hey, look at that picture up there on the right. See the one where he's wearing the red and white trunks? Yeah. See? Oh, okay. No, you're racist. That's me, guys. But we got to remember Rumble survived that storm the first time. you know, the first fight that Rumble and uh DC had, Cormier survived. Cormier survived that storm and then put his own storm on Rumble. You know, Cormier is uh he's such a worldclass wrestler and he's just his his sparring partner is Kane Velasquez and the other one is Luke Rock. So, on a

87:30daily, he's sparring with those guys and and they go hard in AK and he's arguably one of the best wrestlers to ever compete in MMA. There's like a handful of guys you look at as being in contention for being the best wrestler to ever compete in MMA. Henry Cejudo, of course, Olympic gold medalist, you know, there's a few guys, but Cormier is in that mix. Like, he's in the mix. I mean, they all give each other something else, you know what I mean? So, that's a And I think that AKA camp where it's him and Kane and they're just smashing heads together all the time. You know, it's funny when I'm up in Northern Cali, I'll, you know, call whoever and I'm like, "Hey, I'm out here." And they're like, "Do you want to come train?" And I'm like, "No, no." They're like, "You want to come train at AK?" "No, no, thanks. I'll call G I'll call Gil." And he's like, "You want to come by Scrap

88:15Pack and train?" I'm like, "No, I'm good, buddy. all that." I'm like, "Yeah, my level is not anywhere near anybody's level." Yeah. I'm just trying to hold Get someone to hold pads. Yeah. I'm a 46-year-old man. I'm not trying I'm a chubby Indian guy. I'm not trying to It's fun to be around those places, though. Yeah. That's That's what does you in. You go in, you see everybody, you go, "Yeah, I'm not I'm not built for this." Yeah. I'm I'm a hobbyist. These these guys are lifers. You have to have the most insane dedication I think for any athletic endeavor. I think below 40 and I would have gone and trained with them, but I didn't know them then. So, well, it's just a weird thing to dabble in like dabbling in in MMA. It's just you really can't do it. You have to be unless you're some freak athlete. There's always exceptions. There's always people that just have ridiculous eth like

89:02apparently that's what Jon Jones was for the longest time before he moved to Albuquerque. He would take time off and go back to New York and you know train some out there but not train with anybody like uh the people he's training with you know before everybody's out there in Albuquerque now training. Yeah. Well, he moved there and then once he moved there I mean I think everything went up to the next level. But he's he was a guy that could take all that time off, come back and still everybody up. Mhm. Just just a freak athlete. Is he contact Did they lift his banan or I don't know, man. I don't know. I don't think they sentenced him. Well, they I don't know if he got sentenced. They sentenced Connor $150,000 for a water bottle. Yeah, that seemed a little excessive. Yeah, a tiny bit, huh? Why' they do that? Why? It's not like he's a habitual bottle thrower that, you know,

89:47like we are finally punishing you for this. Yeah, I'm sick of all that bottle throwing, bro. It was a stupid thing to do, though. That was uh it's I mean, well, come on. Did you really think he was gonna hit him? You know, it's too far away. It wasn't I thought it was just hype for the fight. You know, it is just hype for the fight. You know, it's not like he threw a glass bottle. He threw a water. He refuses to fight in Las Vegas after $150,000 fine. That's fair enough. Well, it's a good thing to get the Vegas people to recognize there's consequences to this. But the UFC is so big right now, they sell out no matter who's fighting and community service. Yeah, the 50 hours of community service. Wow. 50 hours is a real week. It's a week worth of work folks got to do. Yeah. I I don't know. That's ridiculous. Well, you know, they're flexing people. They like flexing. They really shouldn't

90:37have thrown water bottles at each other or Monster energy drinks or whatever they did. That shit's stupid. You got to fight eventually. They throw things at each other. You know, you get a little amped up. They're young kids, you know. But ultimately, I think the $150,000 fine is worth it for them. the amount of money that they all made that everybody made, you know. So the the government, the, you know, athletic commission gets to step in, slap them a little bit, take a little cash, make a make a stink out of it. They get to protest it. But the fact is that that press conference where he threw that water bottle at Nate Diaz is probably worth 400,000 as far as profit, right? You know how many more people got hyped up for it? People love a fight at a press conference. They love when someone throw Don't do it folks if you're listening. Jon Jones and Daniel Cormier. That was

91:26one of the reasons why that fight became such a big deal is because at the face off. But did they have to pay any fines after that? yeah they did. Yeah, they did. I don't know how much they paid. Well, maybe that's what the problem is. Maybe they want to discourage anybody from doing this further. Maybe they want to say, "Look, it's it's as old as fight any fight game is." And it's also real. Yeah. I mean, like the Jon Jones one in particular was real. When Daniel put his hand on John's neck and pushed him back, John was like, "Fuck that. That's just that's just not happening." He didn't give a if there was a million people around. He was only fined 50,000. Yeah. So John was fined $50,000 and was ordered to complete 40 hours of community service. And Cormier was fined 9,000 and ordered to complete 20 hours of community service. So they made a distinction that Cormier was less guilty

92:12than John, but Cormier touched him first. Did he? Yeah. He grabbed his neck and pushed him back because John got face to face with him and touched faces with him. The fines constituted 10 10% of each fighter's respective purse for the January 3rd fight. Wow. That doesn't is that does that even make sense? That's how little they made. Does that really make sense? N grand. Really? For the title fight? Hey man, that sounds crazy. I don't know what their deal is because they get paid and then they have like they have like a reported pay and then they have a different pay like percentage of pay-per-view and a bunch of different stuff. But they always show it in the papers and uh they don't show locker room bonuses. I don't know what that means. Don't get mad at me. When you go if you go if you go to uh I follow every time I go to Yahoo News, it tells you

93:01the whole purse breakdowns for everybody and then the bonus for the nightly bonus and the percentage bonus. No, they do performance of the night bonuses that make that public, but they also do some weird locker room bonus thing. Oh, I don't know about that one. I don't know what the that's all about. What did they just It's a private company is the point. Didn't they just find Roy as well? Yeah, they they're going to find him. What did he say? What did you just put up? It was uh his Jones attorney was arguing that they shouldn't be paying off a percentage of the of their purses and Cormier is scheduled to make a base pay of 90 for the fight and also a possible 90,000 win bonus. So h just seems like a really low amount. I don't it feels it feels like that's not right. It's 10%. I know it's so low to be fighting for the world title. It seems wrong. I mean seems incorrect. Seems wrong too,

93:50right? It see it's always seemed wrong to me. At the highest levels, those guys are making some serious cash. Now, what's interesting is how many how many people are going to reach that level. And what you're seeing is a lot of people that are trying to sort of generate public interest the same way Connor's done. So, there's like guys who really never really trash talked before who are really into trash talking now. They're not good at it either. But it's it's awkward and it's uncomfortable. And here's the thing is it's if you if you're a Conor McGregor and it comes natural and that's what you do and that's one thing, but if you're like you've got a strategy and your strategy is to be the controversial guy and you're going to get everybody to pay attention to you like that's a lot of work, man. I mean Nate is what Nate is, you know? Yeah, exactly. So, and on one

94:35hand, it's also not what martial arts are at their best. like at the very best they're two guys who want to compete and test themselves against each other at the very highest level, right? And when we think of a martial artist, we don't think of some dude who's insulting someone and spitting at them and throwing water balls. I mean, they're just they're trying to take the thug aspect out of it, which is fair. Well, you think when you think because you know, when you think back to it, it was always Bruce Lee, everybody respecting and bowing and you know, Yeah. Now it's just, you know, a lot of meattheads who know how to fight. You know, there's definitely that too. But to achieve the level of like a world class level, like you have to have so much control over who you are. You have to be able to figure out where all your personality pitfalls are and soothe out all the

95:27in your life and concentrate on the work. It's such a weird sport, man. There's no sport that carries the consequences of loss like MMA does. Uh, boxing as well. I would say boxing is pretty close, but MMA like But I think in MMA you can have a loss and still come back and it doesn't affect you that much. You think it does in boxing? In boxing, because you know it's so shady in boxing. Oh, he lost. No good. We need somebody else. a a uh an undefeated record in boxing means a lot more than it does in MMA. Well, there's only been a few, right? Right. That's what everybody strives for. They strive for that Gennady Golovkin, you know, perfect undefeated record as they go into the big fight, you know. But that didn't harm Canelo. I think Canelo's stock rose in the Floyd Mayweather fight. Yeah, cuz he was so young. Mhm. And I honest I was at that fight as a matter of fact and I

96:32think that Floyd could have stopped Canelo in that fight if he really wanted to. You think so? Yeah. He was just hitting him at will and you could see Canelo going back. I mean all he had to do is just put a little bit more pressure on him. But I think Floyd being uh somewhat compassionate was like if I stop this kid it might ruin his career. So Wow. You really think that? I think that. Wow. That's an interesting way of looking at it. I didn't think so. I thought he's not taking any chances. He's boxing smart and Canelo can still pop and he carries that pop late into the fight and he's dangerous. So if Floyd opened up to try to really hurt him and stop him, he ran the risk of being countered. Canelo is a master. He's very he's Canelo is not as fast as Floyd, but his timing is really good. He's It is. But at that time he was still very green. Mhm. No, for sure. And

97:20Floyd really was in the in the zone in that fight. He was just hitting him pop pop and then he would hit crank a right hand on him. You see Canelo go back a little bit. You know, I think Canelo's chin's a little overrated. Uh really, we saw that when uh who the knocked him down in the like the first or second round in that one fight. Yeah, somebody knocked him down fairly recently, right? No, maybe about around four or five fights ago. Maybe about four three four years ago. Yeah, it was a younger Canelo then, but um do you know what I'm talking about? No, I don't I definitely don't think he has a bad chin, but anybody can get knocked down, especially early in your career. You know, very aggressive guys. Also heard that Canelo sparred with Golovkin before. Oh, yeah. Golovkin beat the piss out of him in sparring and that's why he's saying no thanks. Yeah, not interested in that

98:08fight. He's just trying to I think he's just trying to sharpen up his skill set before he gets back in there with him. Yeah, man. I don't know how much I mean, Triple G knocked down Kovalev in sparring. Did he? Mhm. I had heard that. Yeah, even Kovalev said it. He goes, "You know, he hits really hard." He goes, "I wasn't prepared that day, but you know, wow." He said, "They're also very good friends as well." Golovkin's a scary guy cuz he looks like some cute little boy band. Yeah. He does not look like he can He doesn't even look like he throws with power. He looks like he's from a Russian boy band. Yeah. Right. He's so cute. He's just so goofy, you know? Yeah. He's adorable. And if you look at his body, it's not the scariest body. It's just Yeah. Not chiseled. It's just He's a thin guy. Yeah. Like you see Rumble knocking people out, you look at his body, you

98:52go, "Well, that makes sense." You know, you see Golovkin knocking people out and you go, "Wow, where's all that coming from?" I don't Yeah, that's He doesn't have huge legs. He doesn't have particularly big traps. He's He's got flaw Yeah. Look at him there. He's got flawless technique, though. Yeah. Flawless. He had over 300 amateur fights. Yeah. He's so aggressive, too. He's so he's so aggressive and he keeps a pace on guys that's very difficult to handle. And he also, you know, people go, "Oh, he's beatable." I'm like, I just think he does things for the fight game. Like, I know I can knock you out. I'm just going to let I'm going to extend this a little bit just to give people Yeah. It's almost says it too, but you see him do it. You can see like he basically just, you know, I'm going to get I'm going to make it look like I get comfortable with you. But,

99:41you know, at any point he can be like, "All right, good night. Good night." You know, and he could do it at any point. Well, he definitely if he wants to risk getting hit, but he bleeds guys, you know, he he saps them. He's he's a a left hooker to the body, you know. He he stays on guys with combinations and he's always pressing forward like you never you never rest with that guy. Yeah. He doesn't he doesn't move back very Yeah. It's a really interesting style cuz uh another guy's got a crazy style like that is Vasili Lmanenko. Oh, Lmanenko is probably one of the best fighters in the game right now. It's insane. He's fighting uh Nikki Walters. Is that his name? Walters, the Jamaican kid. Yeah, that's going to be a good fight. Well, it's he's uh another guy that like if you wanted to see beautiful technical movement and defensive movement in boxing. When I was training uh with

100:29Ariza, we would go to train at Robert Garcia's gym. Oh, yeah. And Lmanenko would be there every now and then. There he is. Like, look at this. He's a little guy, too. He's just standing right in front of people, beating them up and slipping everything they throw at him. God, he's so good. Slick and accurate. Look at that. Moves just enough. Mhm. Look at this. Like knowing exactly what's coming and when. Damn. He's uh a really interesting fighter as well because he's so hard to hit, but he's also so aggressive. It's weird. Like that's not Hands down. Look at that. Hands down. But he's lost in boxing, in pro boxing. Yeah, he lost to that Mexican dude. Um, his name. Who do you move lose to? Uh, old old warrior veteran. Solis. Omar Solis. Orlando. Orlando. Orlando. That's right. CO's a warrior, too. Yeah. A guy who's been around forever. Yeah. Nick. That's who he's fighting next. Yeah.

101:32Nicholas Walters. Well, he's definitely putting some attention on these uh lighter. It was a split decision. So, I mean, you know, whenever it's a split decision, you could be like, could have gone either way. Mhm. Yeah. It was apparently a crazy war and he wants to fight him again. Do you think Hendo Bisping should have been a draw or a split decision? I think the scoring system sucks. Yeah. Some people said that that first round wasn't a 10-8 round. That doesn't That was more than a 108. That might have been a 10-7 round. It's definitely a 108 for sure because he knocked him down. He had him rocked. He was standing on top of it and Bisping survived for sure. I mean, Bisping showed true grit. He got through that. He pressed on, but he was in a world of and I think he would admit his face shows it. I mean, he's all beat up. So, that's a that's a significant round. And

102:22then there was another round where Hendo knocked him down again, right? Yep. So, that was the second or third. It's hard to tell, man. But the other thing that balanced that out was that Bisping was way more active. And you got to take that into account. It's not like Bisping was landing all those shots and attacking because Hendo let him. No, it's cuz he was imposing his game on Henderson. Then the question is like, is Henderson's game more impactful? Well, maybe, but there's less impacts. Okay. Well, that how about damage? Well, damage wise, Hendo was way down. This guy gave bisping the first round. Who did the the first judge white? No way. Yeah, look, they all three. The first round is the top row. This is the second round right here. Oh, but second round look. Even that guy gave the first Okay. Who gave it to him? Okay. The only round they gave uh Henderson was the second

103:16round. These two judges. So they he made the first the first two rounds. He made the first round 109. 109. They all made it 10. They all made it a 10- nine. See, that's not smart. That's not smart. That's not right. The minute there's a knockdown like that, it's got to be a 108 round. It's not just a knockdown. It was like a knockdown in boxing makes a 10 10 round, a 10 N round, or 108 round. Yeah. Like if they're evened up, it'll make it a nine round, but for the most part, it's a 10-8 round, right? A guy knocks a guy down. You knock a guy down. You got first you won the round, then you got the knockdown. But it's a fact. There's no facts in MMA when it comes to that. There's no like one thing that happens where you definitely take a point off. We We know that with boxing, right? Well, with MMA, that wasn't just a knockdown. There was a knockdown and then followed by some ferocious

104:06hair raising ground and pound. Yeah. He got elbowed. He got punched. He got beat up. He got out of there. His face is bleeding. His eyes closed. You can't say that wasn't close to being stopped. Yeah. You got you got to be on the brink of being stopped. So that round I disagree with across the board. Yeah. And then it's trying to figure out who won the other rounds. There was the other one where Hendo heard him. What What What round was that? Was it the second round that he hurt him again? It must be the 10 round. Yeah, the second round he hurt him again. And then do you have to argue about the fourth and the fifth rounds? You have to figure out who won those. It's uh it was a close fight, but I could see I could see the way uh many people thought that Bisping landed more and even though they weren't as impactful, you have to you have to add that up against the lower volume but

105:00more power by Henderson. Well, it's about effectiveness, right? Yeah. Well, Henderson at the end of the fight looked like he just got done sparring. Yeah. And Bisping looked like he just got done with a fight with Henderson. You know, it's really what it looked like. He he went through five rounds with one of the toughest guys ever. The question is who won it. I think the the system's flawed. I could see under the system that we have today that Bisping won that fight. I could see it by volume. I could see it as a draw. I I could see it as a fair draw. Mhm. And uh I could see that too. And that would have been a very fair outcome. I could see that too. I definitely I don't think Bisping did enough to beat Dan. And I don't think Dan did enough to beat Bisping. That's a good argument. It's a real good argument. And I think if there's ever a fight where you could say a draw might

105:49be justified, that's one. If you look online, like people who think Bisping won versus people who think Henderson won, it's pretty much split down the middle. Except English people, of course. And even American people, there's a lot of American people that think Bisping won. So, uh, it's it's a it's a flawed system. the system of judging month. Uh uh what's it called? Medical suspension. Yeah. Yeah. that ain't good for you. A long one. Yeah. Well, they looked that fight and went settle down. Let's Everybody relax for a little while. That was You just went to war with a meat machine. Yeah. Like a cleaver. Who was it? Kung was telling me that uh Henderson and we're hanging out and Henderson just punched him like as a joke because he hit so hard. Yeah, I'm sure. He was like, "Wow, what the dude?" You know, I don't think it makes sense. He's just got one of

106:39those weird frames. There's some people that just have power that just doesn't make any sense. Yeah. Yeah. There's like regular power and then, you know, there's that Henderson thing, that rumble thing. Yeah. I need to step in and crank the right way in order to get power. I don't have that just I'm going to hit you and you're going to feel power. It's Do you know who's got it that's scary? That John Linker kid. That little guy. He used to fight at 125 and now uh he's fight he fought at 135 in his last fight but missed weight and beat John Dodson in like a really close decision but he's uh he's got that weird spooky power even for a little guy for a 135. It's kind of rare. There's little guys that have that have some heavy hands. He's got the heaviest the heaviest I've ever seen in this division. He's a clobberer. He just gets guys up against the cage and just

107:26clobbers them. And it's one of those things where when they feel the power the first time, you can see it in their eyes. They're like, "Holy shit." That's like when when Golovkin hit somebody, you see it in their face immediately. I've never seen people wse until they got hit by him. Yeah. He's something special. For sure. People Every time they get hit, you look at their face. Oh, what the Do you know his boxing fights don't have much pay-per-view buys, though? Yeah, because he's not You know, that's crazy to me, though. He's he's so exciting. He's exciting, but they're, you know, he's with Tom Laughler. And who's Tom Laughler? That's his promoter. is does promoter up? No, it's just that Tom Wford does not have the connections I think that Bob Arum or or uh Floyd Mayweather. Uh yeah, what's his name there? Al Heymon has, you know. Well, Golden Boy, right?

108:11Golden Boy and Roger De um Oscar De Hoya and um yeah, then there's, you know, but Al Heymon's the guy really who's got all the connects and I like how they take in fighters there, too. like Bernard Hopkins is one of the partners over there and it's uh they seem to do a good job. What's a crazy thing though? They go from being a fighter to being a promoter. Yeah. And then realizing you're making way more money as a promoter. Oh yeah, for sure. You're not in the line of fire at all. You're like this is I think Hopkins going to take one more fight though. Yeah, I think so. Just to get it out of at least 50, right? He's 51 this year now or next year. Incredible. Never been out of shape though. I know. Well, I mean, he's super super disciplined guy, but it's just amazing that he's willing to do one more fight at this age and and then of course being a successful promoter now, you know,

109:00that's you don't leave fighting fighting, you know, Hopkins 52nd. I'll fight before my 52nd birthday in January. So, he's going to soon. How is he going to do that? Who is he going to fight? December up somewhere in LA. Probably at the forum in December in LA. Dude, we should go. I'm in. It'll be the last time Bernard Hopkins ever fights. We should go. HBO telecast. Dude, we got to go. Celled verse. I want to be there for that live. I was Oh, I was uh I was at that Celo Tekashima fight. So, that's going to be What date is it? December. I don't know. It doesn't say. I don't know. It could take place at this one. It says it doesn't have a date on it. Okay. No, they're having a rematch again. Who? The Celo Takashimura. Oh, really? Wait. Oh, it's just at this fight. Orlando Celo, who's the the first guy to beat Lmanenko. Oh yeah, this week. So October 12th. Interesting. Well, you

109:59know, I always look back to when Bernard Hopkins fought Tito Trinidad. Oh, yeah. Remember when he threw the flag down in Puerto Rico and they chased him out of the stadium? They wanted to kill him and I I was like, "Oh, I think I remember that time I was like, Trinidad's going to knock him out." I was like, "Oh, he he stopped Trinidad." He beat the out of Trinidad. He didn't just beat the out of him. He boxed his face off before he beat the out of him. Wasn't it Hopkins? I think it was Hopkins that he it I'm I'm almost sure it was Hopkins. He had a fight. Um this was in the probably the late 90s. The guy uh somehow got under him and body slammed him. Y and he dislocated his shoulder. Yeah. And they were like, "We could stop the fight and you could win by, you know, a decision." He goes, "Nope." It was he dislocated his right hand, his right shoulder. Hopkins. Yeah.

110:46Well, didn't he? No, I don't remember that. I remember one time he got thrown out. He dislocated his shoulder and they stopped the fight. No, they stopped the fight because of him getting thrown out of the ring. Maybe he got thrown out of the ring more than once. Yeah, I think this was against Antoine Eckles if I'm not mistaken. H Well, I knew he got thrown out of the ring against one. I remember he got shoulder dislocated and then he still went in the next round and he stopped him with his left hand. Really? Yeah, man. I don't remember that at all. It might not have been Hopkins, but I remember this one. Dawson, huh? Was it was Was it Chad Dawson? Did Chad Dawson do that against No, no, it was it was definitely not Chad. Chad Dawson's another guy. Well, whoever it was. I remember Antoine Eckles being in the mix and name was spelled N T W Hopkins shoulder hurt

111:36after Dawson throws him down. Fight ends in the second. Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah, it was Chad Dawson, but I feel like No, see, it said it was Chad Dawson, but it was it he had also had this happen before before this fight cuz Chad Dawson was that was fairly recently. It was like in the later the late 90s. Yeah, exactly. You know, when when Hopkins was not uh dislocated. Yeah, it was just if you just Google Hopkins record. Yeah. This is not an exciting podcast to listen to while we're while we're googling Bernard Hopkins record so we can I the bed on the Joe Rogan Experience. I don't think it was a loss. I think it was he it was a Did he fight Antoine Eckles? See if you find they're right there. Right down there. Antoine Eckles. TKO 111. Maybe that was the second fight cuz whoever whoever threw him down he fought him twice. Yeah. Whoever threw him down, he came back and beat their

112:42ass. Yeah. See, do you see it? What's that? The wrong way. I'm going to look it up a different way. Okay. Jamie's going to look it up a different way. I remember seeing it on ESPN. Canelo and Gennady Golovkin though would break the bank. Oh, yeah. Maybe Golovkin needs uh to get like one more big ass fight. He's supposed to be fighting Danny Jacobs. Oh, really? In J December, there was a purse bid just now. Oh, yeah. Purse bid. I like it. Look at you. You're deep in the in the boxing and the DJ world. You know how I get down, Joe. You do get down. I do get down, buddy. Yeah. What other good fights are happening right now in boxing? Oh, Andre Ward. Andre Ward Kovalev. Yeah. And I'm in Toronto that night. God damn it. Think that one through. Is that one in Vegas? Yeah. T-Mobile, I believe. That's a good I'm going with Kof on that. It's a good fight. It's a very good fight. I

113:38don't think uh I don't think Andre has the power to hurt Kovalev. Do you think it's because he's going up to 75? Cuz he's at 175 and to me has not looked that impressive at 175. We only had one fight at 175, right? Two. Two at two. Oh, I thought he just had one. And uh he doesn't hit very hard. Who did he fight at 175 before that? He fought a Dominican guy. I was at that fight that was in uh on like in Ontario, California. And uh Oh, no. Maybe that was at 168, but whatever it was, he I he's fought twice now. Yeah, it's it's hard when a guy has to figure out what to do to order to make the big bucks. You got to take a chance. And Andre is dominating at 68. He's just such a good boxer, man. Such a smart dude. You know, he fought a big portion of his career with a up shoulder. I did not know that. Yeah, he had a good shoulder. He had a up eye or something. I don't know about

114:31that, but he had might have been the shoulder I was getting mixed up with his eye, maybe. But he he finally had shoulder surgery like two years ago. He had to take a full almost like a full year off. Yeah, he took a lot of time off. Shoulder surgery is like that. He's had a lot of years off. He keeps getting too much time off as far as I'm concerned. I mean, you like a mean boss. I am. If you're at the far concern, as far as I'm concerned, kid, if you're at the prime of your career, you need to be in the prime of your career. Yeah, but if you got a jack shoulder, there's not a goddamn thing you do about it. True. little rotator cuff never hurt nobody. I mean hurt a lot of people. They the boxers are it's really common. They get shoulder injuries, but um probably from overextending from a lot of things just just sparring. You know, I know guys that have had their

115:18biceps torn off because they were sparring and they threw a punch and someone blocked the punch like an arm got in the way and just the full extension being caught like halfway and then popes, they get a torn bicep tendon. And that's why I don't know biceps, guys. Well, if you do a lot of curls, you really should be careful because you can break that thing. And when it breaks, it pulls up and knots. Like, you never seen Matt Sarah's arm? No. Matt Sarah's got one bicep that broke and then curled up. They can't fix it. Well, they could have right after it happened. Like, if you go to the hospital right after it happened, they reattach it and then you could fix it. It's like an Achilles tear almost. Why? When your Achilles snaps your Doesn't your ankle just go loose like that? Kind of snaps up like a rubber band. Well, it's it's like that in a way, but apparently it just looks bad. Like it

116:10pulls up and it hangs up there and it looks bad, but doesn't really affect the movement of your arm. So, a lot of guys don't do anything about it. They just they don't even get it fixed. They just leave it with that weird lump in it. Doesn't it's got to hurt in some level or um No, I guess it doesn't. Not according to Matt Sarah, you know. Well, he's the terror. He has the terror, but um you know there's there's not a goddamn thing in the world that beats your body up more than MMA and maybe football between those two things. I would much rather watch MMA. Football I don't understand football on any day. It's cuz you're Canadian. You're lucky you're here. Lucky we let you in. I know. I you know I really Where's Oh his armor. Is that it? Yeah. You can see he's like missing a chunk of his arm. His bicep. His right bicep. It's like the front part of it from the elbow. I

116:59see towards the shoulders. He has a high bicep. Yeah. Just got a chunk torn out of it. But it doesn't affect his movement, you know? It's weird. You're It just looks odd. But that's a that's one that breaks. The human body is very soft when it comes to the You see the durability of animals and you see how goddamn flimsy we are. Russell Peters. Oh, yeah. They they've got it figured out. Animals do. Yeah. If they figured it out, they figured out how they know exactly how to stay in their lane. Yes, they definitely do that. Humans are always like, "Well, there's no Renaissance animals. There should be." That know everything. You know, they they can fly. They know how to swim under water. Would be the Renaissance animal. Yeah. Give a hoot. Owls are creeps, man. I remember when uh first moved to California. They're super violent. Well, they're predators. Yeah. When I first moved to

117:59California, I saw an owl that was flying off with a rabbit and dropped the rabbit. And uh cuz I was, you know, he had killed this rabbit, I guess, real close to the road. And as I was driving, he tried to fly off with the rabbit and then decided, "Fuck this. I'm not getting away fast enough." And just dropped the rabbit and then flew. So, I see him fly off with the rabbit and his talons and then go, "Fuck this." and just release it. And then boom, the rabbit hits the ground. So, I get out of my car and look at the rabbit and this rabbit's just eviscerated. He's just torn its guts out. And um I'm sitting there going like, "This is not what I think of when I think of a owl." Yeah. I I think you know I didn't even think of I I guess I knew they ate rats and rodents and stuff like that, but I didn't think they they literally would take out something that's their size.

118:50Oh, they they don't play. They got they got big old talons on them. That's why. Yeah. And beat and a bad attitude. Yeah, they're I see hawks circling my backyard a lot lately. Oh, yeah. Cuz I have a puppy. Oh, no. And uh and so what we do is when we see there's usually like it starts with one, then you see two, then you see three and four. Jesus. So I get my assistant to take out his drone and he flies it up and scares them away. Oh, that's a good move. Yeah, that's a very good move. Aha, you We're combating you. But they will eat a puppy. Have you seen these? Uh what is this? Makocks, I think. Hey, I'm not looking at you, Monkey deer mountain. There's this small island in Japan where these they have this relationship, I guess, where the monkeys they like ride the deer like humans would ride a horse. Shut the up. They kind of like This isn't real. It definitely is. It defin It's a little

119:40humping it right now, but this is definitely real. I like looked it up. They uh this might not be riding around so much, but they they'll pick uh like what little ticks and off them, parasites, and they eat them. Like they have this weird relationship where like they allow it to happen. They like let them ride the groomers for the deer. This is crazy. Crazy. That's just Makma dear. That's amazing. Wow. So, what we're we're reading is monkey or watching rather monkey deer mounting in Japanese macox. I can't believe this, man. I thought this was fake. This is incredible. So, um favorite rapper, Tupac Mak. Oh, you How dare you? He's grooming the the deer. There's another one that I saw. Um, god damn it. Now I forget what it was. I was just going to Another one that had to do with monkeys. Oh, baboons. Baboons have pet dogs. I've not seen this. Yeah, they get dogs

120:41as puppies. They raise them and they keep them around as security and the dogs bark if anything comes near. They raise them like a wild pet. Yes. Pictures videos of this. Yeah, there's a video of it. It's nuts. And how smart are these? The dog doesn't start thinking it's a a chimpanzeee or anything. Dog acts like a dog. Like look at this. He's got him. He's like holding on to the puppy. Is there audio to this? Well, the video is entitled. So, he's got the little puppy's holding on to it. Oh, man. He's rough the way he drags that dog around. Holy It's called Baboons. Ra kidnap and raise feral dogs as pets. Yeah, but they literally raise them as pets. They beat him down. They keep him around. They're holding on to him. Look, he's sitting on him and holding it in place. Oh, it's fighting against him. It bites against him. So, he's like picking it up and and forcing it to the ground.

121:41He's holding on to its tail and he drags it around like a toy. Like, he has no concern. They're such a weird animal, man. That looks like a lion a person, you know, doesn't it? Yeah. They're so weird. I mean, is a baboon is one of the weirdest animals you'll ever see. That looks like us in a transitional stage in the evolution chart. Almost like a branch, right? One went left, one went right. Yeah. Because they have that lion tail and that mane in the front. Like it's a strange strange appearance. I found this one dude's page. Um, I don't know. Uh, his, uh, page is all in Arabic. I don't know what it says, but every day is a new animal up of an animal video. Like, every day. It's overwhelming following them. Yeah. Hit see translation right there. Yeah. I don't want to know. I don't even want to know what they're saying. But I think I mean, the translations are always off so

122:42bad. That's actually kind of funny. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That they're they're never dead on. I'm trying to think of what the this dude's name is, but I uh I'll figure it out. I'll put it up on Instagram later. But his uh the animal man, his page is on what the other day was this these hyenas tearing apart this it was like I guess a wilderbeast like guts first. This thing's trying to get away and get out of the water and these hyenas are just ripping it apart. Guts first. Are savage. Oh, it's so hard to watch. I can't watch that stuff. We're so soft. Russell Peters. We are living here. We too much compassion. Well, it's not just that we have too much compassion. I'm saying that it's so easy for us to get by. Yeah. We don't have to worry about a hyena getting us. My dad grew up in the jungle. What jungle? In India. Oh, Jesus. Yeah. So, literally would uh he hunted tigers, leopards,

123:37uh wild boar. Jesus Christ. Yeah. Your dad did that? Dad a lot. Yeah. He was born 1925. So, you know, back then it was it's not like he would hunt them for fun, you know? Right. But yeah, he was a big game hunter. Wow. We have a tiger skin with a head. Holy Yeah. There's the last one that he uh shot was in the 60s when it was already it was already banned. You weren't allowed to shoot tigers in, but the uh this maneater went to a village and was killing people in the village. So, they had asked my dad to can you go get this? Can you go? we know your family's a bunch of hunters. Can you go get this tiger for us? And he's like, "Well, what's in it for me?" And they were like, "We'll give you $15." Like that was a lot. Like it it it was the equivalent to that. Somebody's saying to you today, "I'll give you $15." Whoa. And uh he said, "Well, how about you keep your money? I get to keep

124:32the skin." So they made like an exemption. They were like, "Yeah, cuz he's getting a maneater. It wasn't like he was just randomly killing a tiger." Boy, that's a monster movie. So he would uh here I'll tell you exactly how he did it. I remember the story clearly. He would he got he went to where there was two trees uh side by side. So he built up a little fort in this one tree and then he tied a bull, a blue ox around the other tree. And then he went and sat up in the tree at around, you know, 5 6:00 in the evening and he sat there, you know, reading magazines and stuff and and then he knew when the night falls that the tiger would come out. And then as soon as the bull started going crazy and running around the tree a lot because he knew he was scared, my dad was he had his shotgun with him, a 308, a 308 I think. And uh and he had his flashlight and the minute his flashlight

125:23touched the barrel of the uh gun, it made a metal noise. And then as soon as he did that, the tiger looked up at him and instead of going for the ax, leaped straight at my dad in the tree. Oh my god. My dad just fumbled and shot and hit him right here in the uh throat. Oh my god. The tiger flipped back and then he he flashed the flashlight on his eyes to see if they were still glossy. Then he put another shot in them just for safety. Whoa. And we have that skin to this day. Holy Your dad was gangster. It's at It's at my house in It's not at my house. My We have it in Canada and uh and I want to bring it here, but I don't know if we'll be able to. No, I don't think you will. Well, you you might be able to get some sort of historical exemption. Yeah. I mean, I I don't know what paperwork I need for it. I It's hard to prove. You know what I mean? So, that seems like uh maybe you'd have to I

126:18think what happens when they find those things and they're illegal is they have to donate them to museums. Yeah. See, I don't want to lose that. It's family heirloom cuz um I remember reading about someone getting arrested. It was a long time ago. I want to say it was like the 70s or the 80s. Someone got arrested with tiger skins. They had some tiger skins that were uh obtained, one of them was obtained illegally, right? And you know, but it was illegally in like 1937 when they shot it. And this person had had a couple of them and they were in trouble because when that happens, if someone sells you one, it's apparently your responsibility since it's a banned item. Yeah. To bring you have to bring it to like somewhere and then they have to post it or something. It's like you're not allowed to possess it. So if you do possess it, you could be in big trouble.

127:12Yeah. This was all properly gotten and properly imported into Canada. But u what part of India did this take place? Um it was a part it's a small railway village called Banpur. It's kind of in the middle of the country. Is that anywhere near the Sununds? I cannot confirm nor deny that that was the um subject of this documentary that I saw where they were talking about the sundanss is a very unusual section of uh the river system in India because it's very brackish for like a long period of time and these animals apparently drink the water and the water has a high salt content and it it's super irritable to the tigers and he thinks they make it's one of the theories they make the tigers more aggressive They're just in pain all the time from drinking salty water. And they've killed some insane amount of people over the last couple hundred years. I think it's

128:09somewhere in the neighborhood of 200 plus thousand people have been killed by tigers in the last couple hundred years in this area. I remember going there when I was 11 or 12 around that age and my dad took us, we went to my grandmother's. We still lived out there and uh he took us for a walk. We all had to carry guns. I was 11 walking around with a rifle. Oh my god. And you, everybody had to carry a gun because, you know, he took us to like a like a river and you could see fresh tiger prints in the mud. And he was like, "Look, see?" And you follow the prince and you go, "Don't." My dad was like, "Don't go that way." Cuz that's where he went. So, you're going to go the other way now. It's a big tiger sanctuary right next to it in the lab. Yeah. Here's Baron. And then this is a I don't I can't see it. I'm sure you've seen Oh, wow. That's so wild. I've never looked at that like

128:59that. That's pretty cool. Bumpy. That's all That's all I know that. That's pretty dope. I know that area when I was a kid. I'm trying to find a picture of my dad with uh uh We have some of the shots here. Did you see that video from that wild animal park in Beijing? Oh my god, that was awesome. You I saw it on your Instagram first. That I was like, "What the was this? Why did you get out of your car? What makes you think? Yeah, people just get mad. Were Yeah. Yeah, that's what you wrote that they were she mad. She got she was mad and that's why she got out of the car. She apparently got mad at somebody in the car. I don't know who. But she got out and she survived. Her mom who got out to chase the tiger away. After the tiger pulled her off, the mom got killed. Oh, so the one that got taken didn't get killed. Yep. Oh. Woman mauled in Beijing. Tiger attacked to

129:52sue. Oh my god. The tiger, I'm sure he doesn't have insurance. Oh my god. She thinks she hadn't been fully aformed of the dangers and left the vehicle because she was car sick. Well, she was yelling at somebody. Oh, here we go. We're going to have to watch it. Right there. I see. She was car sick. she was car jacked. This is so crazy. She She gets out. She storms over to the other side. The other person gets out and she's arguing. And she's like, "Listen, I'm telling you right now, you better shut the up, Come here." That tiger just ran out and grabbed her, dude. And then someone else goes out after the tiger. And then uh park ranger. Yeah. Park ranger runs in there and that's all we see. It looked It looked like the tiger went, "Wow, this is the easiest lunch I've ever had." Tiger probably couldn't help himself. Finally saw something to Jack. And best yet, she wasn't paying

130:48attention, so her back was turned. Oh yeah. You ever see those videos of the tigers like creeping up on people when they're sitting with their back to the cage? They just dive on the back of them. They can't help themselves. That's what they do. They're being tigers. They are being tigers. The tigers too busy being tigers. What are you doing? Checking your tweets. No, I'm trying to find this picture of my dad. Oh, the tiger rug. Yeah. Uh hopefully it says you have to sign a piece of like a a waiver that says you will not get out of your car once you enter the park. But she thought it was wasn't that and no one explained it to her. What does she think she's signing? So dumb. She might have not been paying attention and not known that. Nobody really reads that stuff, but if somebody explains it to you, how the could they just let you drive around your own car where they

131:29have tigers? China doesn't give a No, that's just such a ridiculous policy. They would never have that in America with the liability insurance that people have to carry over here. In Canada, they have a place called African Lion Safari. When I was a kid, we used to go and you drive through with your own car and uh there was Yeah, there was lions. There was and there was giraffes and monkeys would jump on your car and up your antenna. And there was a place like that in New Jersey that I went to where the monkeys would jump on your car. Yeah. And they Yeah. They'd pull people's windshield wipers off and Oh yeah. They were really destructive. But there's a big difference between that and a lion. You guys had lions. It was called African lions. I don't believe I saw a lion, but I do remember the monkeys up the car. And then my mom telling me that recently when I was home

132:18that we should take my daughter to go see African Lions. I'm not going to my car to African Lions. Are you kidding me? I saw a bobcat and a bunch of moms or a bunch of babies um recently which real weird. No, no, no. I was in Tahone Ranch. We were driving down this road and this bobcat and I think I want to say two or three babies. But I saw it so briefly and I knew that it was a cat. I saw it so briefly and the guys I was with thought it was a cat that in my mind I had saw I had seen a cougar. I had seen a small cougar and some cougar puppies. When they explained to me that no, no, no, no, it was a bobcat. Then I had to look into my memory and I was like, how much of my memory is concocted? How much of my memory in this situation is just like a total falsification what I wanted it to be? Well, I've just filled in the blanks. Like I knew it was a living

133:10thing. I knew it was some kind of a cat and I knew it ran away really quick and there was a couple of them. So, when we said it was a cat, I was like, "Oh, well, that must have been a mountain line." Very small mountain line and I was trying to figure it out. Bobcats are just uh they have really big paws, right? Isn't that what it is? Some of them. Oh, no. Those are links. Lyns have really big paws. Yeah, cuz they walk through the snow. Yeah, those are weird to see, man. I saw one. I don't want to see one of those. I saw one of those when I was in Canada. Did you? Yeah. Walking on the side of the road. I took a picture of it going right there. Never saw one ever. Never saw a moose een. What? And I know they're moo. I know. Who are you? Yeah, I don't know who I am. Isn't that like the Canadian animal? Or is it like a duck or something? Uh, the goose is ours. Is it for real? The

133:54Canada goose. No, that's your animal. I don't know. I think that's the only one that we identify as Canadian. But moose is definitely part of our uh our uh heritage. In a way, that's kind of appropriate that you guys are the goose and we're the eagle. You know, we're shitty, mean bird. Doesn't give a Kills everything, but can be tamed. A eagle can be tamed. Yeah, sure. You can get them to sit on your arm. He's not trying off leather. I think you have to raise them, but people definitely raise eagles. I It's not like you can get a regular eagle and tame them, but if you raise them, I'm sure you can get them to the point where they don't try to kill you all the time. Got to like Dave's house of eagles or something. Such an awesome animal, though. It's It's just amazing that there's such a variety of different things to kill things. Whoa. That's your dad sitting on a godamned

134:49man eating tiger that he killed. What a scary thing that is. You know, another thing about it, they're so beautiful. Oh, yeah. It's weird. Like, you're going to be killed by something that's so amazing to look at. They don't they always say that if tigers were in Africa, they would be the king of the jungle. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, they're way bigger. Especially the the big ones. Bigger, meaner. Yeah, they're they're faster. They're like they're on a next level to a lion. There was a video that I watched the other day. Are ligers real? Yes, liars are real. But ligers tend to be like docile for some strange reason. I don't think anybody's ever been attacked by a liger. They also have some weird growth thing going on where the whatever regulates growth. They It doesn't Wow. Yeah. Doesn't work on them. That's a liger. Yeah. They're so huge. They're like way bigger than

135:37regular cats. Look at the belly on that guy, though. Yeah. They're giant, dude. I That's an enormous enormous animal. So, uh whether it's the male tiger the female lion. I think that's how it goes. So, when that happens, apparently the um Look at that. That's amazing looking, isn't it? Um, apparently when when it does happen, the uh cat, whichever side is the li I don't know it's the lion or the tiger, one of the sides is supposed to get its uh the gene for regulating growth from the woman, but it doesn't get it from the woman or it doesn't get it from the man because the man's a tiger or the man's a lion, however the combination works. But because it's a male and a female, they they or a lion and a tiger, they make this new thing that doesn't know when to stop growing. So it just keeps growing. Yeah. It just gets you bigger. But these are fabricated. These are like Well,

136:32they I think they can appear in the wild, but they don't live in the wild together. Yeah. But they're two animals that are from different part different continents. You know what I mean? So somebody had to have put them together at some point. Not only that, they're not viable. So they're they're hybrids and it's a hybrid that's not viable. Like they can't it's not like a dog. Like a wolf can your dog and those puppies are part wolf and they could a regular dog and there'd be no problem. they would just keep making puppies. It probably good for the gene pool. But with these things, even though a lion and a tiger probably look more similar than a German shepherd and a poodle Mhm. they do, right? They probably look more simil that that baby's a hybrid. So those hybrid babies, they can't reproduce. So they can't produce more ligers. Exactly. Yeah. So it's a they're

137:19one litter animals. Yeah. But like wolf dogs, wolf the wolf dogs could regular dogs and they could they can get by regular dogs and Oh man, by the way, I heard coyotes like crazy in my backyard last night. or screaming? I don't know. They were screaming. They were killing something, I'm sure. Yeah, they're interesting, aren't they? Those are wolves. Yeah, they're actual wolves. Skinny wolves. Yeah, little tiny wolves. They can mate with wolves. They mate with dog. We ran into a uh a litter once when I was doing Fear Factor. We were in this really rural area where we're doing the stunt and we ran into a litter of um coyotes and a Labrador Retriever. Coyote had this guy's Labrador Retriever and the Labrador Retriever gave birth and the the puppies were all outside and we were trying to Were they mangy looking? They were real mangy looking. It was real sad because uh they were

138:07essentially feral and people were kind of trying to rescue them and they were trying to give them to people on the crew and people on the crew were like trying to get the cell phone service. So they could call friends, see if anybody want to take them. Cuz you realize like, wow, these poor little things like they're just they're going to die out here. But there was also the thought like, whoa, who wants a half coyote? Nobody wants that thing ain't going to listen to you, man. Yeah, they're wy. Yeah, that's a wild animal. A tricky little wild animal. That thing is not listening. But if you have like a lot of people are But a lab is like such a calm, peaceful dog, too. Might bounce it out. Yeah. I don't know. Oh, it might be too, you know, it might just make a really lab. I don't know. I'm having this guy on soon. Um, he's a wildlife biologist who's been studying all the ca coyotes

138:54that live in uh urban Los Angeles. Mhm. There's a big article about it about this ongoing research about how just how many coyotes live. There's a ton of them, dude. It's incredible. They've infiltrated and they're they're a part of this. Like we think we like to think of our eco or um our cities rather as environments that are free of anything alive other than us that's dangerous or anything other than us that's a predator. We don't we don't want to think that there's some some thing acting as a predator in our midst like that. Mhm. For the most part we you know we like to think of cities as being barren of wildlife but that's not true at all. No. Well they were they were here before we were not even. Here's the thing. They were, but their range has expanded there. I'm reading a book right now called Coyote America by this guy um Dan Flores and uh he was a wildlife

139:46historian turned author and uh you find out about the history of the coyote. Like apparently all dogs came from North America. All dogs, all cannids, including jackals, including a bunch of that's in Africa right now, all came from North America. All horses, zebras, they all it all came from North America. They went extinct in North America and then were reintroduced later. And the coyotes are a weird animal. How did they get around? I don't know. I guess pangia, I think it was when when the the continents were all connected, you know, when there was a different configuration. Yeah. But this book's amazing, man. Talking about the history of the coyote and how how sneaky those are. The reason why there's so many coyotes, they're all across every city in America today. And that wasn't the case a hundred years ago. Yeah. They've expanded their range due to persecution.

140:34So when anybody shoots them, when wolves come in and start killing them, when anything happens to them, they make more babies. They do that roll call that screaming in the night. When one of them's not one of them's not calling back, the females start producing more eggs. It's crazy They go from having like four offspring to like, you know, four four pups in a litter. Have like 15. Yeah, that's pretty crazy. You know, you know, have you ever heard when a a siren goes by, it sets them off? Yeah. I hear a siren and then all of a sudden you hear a shitload of coyotes and like, "Wow." Have you ever heard a turkey do that? No. When you slam your car door, right? If you're out in the woods and you slam your car door, you'll hear Really? Yeah. It's crazy. Like they have this instinctive reaction. Like turkeys will gobble if you make a turkey call. Like, you know, they have

141:24the make a call like a turkey and the turkey calls back. But they'll also do it if you just slam a car door. They're very They're sensitive to sound. They just freak out. And when they freak out, they can't handle themselves. Like, what was that meat you were cooking the other day on your Instagram? Yes. Yeah. How was it? It's good. Yeah. You ever had? No. Do you cook? Uh I My my lady cooks. She does. I'll give you some. I have some elk here. Do you really? Yeah. I'll take a little elk home. What does it taste like? Like a cow a deer. made sweet sweet love to a deer, but more delicious. Okay. It's like my favorite meat. It's it's it's really good. I thought it looked good and and I never thought I'd ever say this to you, but I really want to taste your meat, Joe. You son of a You can't help yourself. I can't. It's just who you are. You got to accept it. It's true.

142:16When you were telling me about the coyotes and you were saying you were reading the book, what was the name of the book? Coyote America. I was like, have you read Coyote Ugly? I stopped myself. I I hurt. pained me to stop myself from saying it. Some kids say they don't even know what coyote ugly means. Let me explain to you little Coyote ugly is when someone someone that's so ugly that your arm is underneath them when you wake up and you chew your arm off like a coyote caught in a trap just so that you don't have to wake them up and deal with them. It's true. That's what the term coyote ugly comes from, right? That's true. That's a brutal goddamn term. That's mean. I've had a few of those in my time. Have you? Yeah. It's mean. Road coyotes. Some of the old road coyotes. Road. The travels. There's some spots in this country where you, you know, you stop in and you go, "Man, I wish I could

143:14get all of you guys out of here." But then you talk to them and they love it there. Sure. People love where they are. Yeah. you know, but then, you know, they get I get to some spots where I'm like, you know, you're driving through these really small towns and you're looking around and I I always think to myself, wonder if I just stopped the car here, bought a house, and then never called anybody again, just lived here in this little small town. You know what that is? That's a longing for nostalgia. It is. It's like It is. It's like you thinking, I'm going to go back to being a regular guy. I'm tired of being Russell Peters, Mr. International, Mr. World. You know, it's funny. When I go to when I go home to to Toronto, I I always drive through my old neighborhoods, like the the three or four neighborhoods that I did grow up in. I I Do you hang your Rolex out the

144:00window? What? Some, you know, I'm always tempted always tempted to knock on the doors of the houses I lived in. Yeah. But I do it at these ungodly hours, so it'd be really creepy. And you're probably drunk. No, no, no. I'm drunk and drive. But yeah, people don't want you knocking on their door and saying, "Hey, I used to live here." Like, "Yeah, you don't anymore. Nice to see you. Take it easy." I want to just be like, "Hey, I I I grew up in this house. Can I can I just come in and look around?" Like, "No, you I'm hanging meat in the basement. Get out of here." There was a house I was uh I grew up in that was for sale recently. I got to see it online. It was weird. Should have bought it. No. No. We're in Massachusetts. Newton. Newton Upper Falls. But it was interesting to see it. Did you know Dana back then? No. No. No. I didn't know Dana. I didn't know Dana until 200 like

144:48one or something like that. like whenever they bought the UFC. Yeah, he uh he lived in South Boston. I used to work in South Boston at one point in time. Is that where the Southeast are? Yeah, I think he lived there. I think he said he lived in South Boston, but I lived in um Newton Newton upper falls. Now I lived all over the place once I moved out of my parents place. I moved to a lot of shitty neighborhoods and pursuing my comedy dream. Russell Peters, you never had that accent. I did. I did. I found myself on TV when I won the Bay State Games in 19 86 86 or 87 like that. They had this thing called the Bay State Games and it was like this big thing. Um it was this it was this big tournament that they would do like an Olympic style tournament and um there's a tech window. Yeah. And they've televised this fight, but they televised they up the camera and the camera

145:42missed. I I won by knockout in the first round in like 30 seconds. And then um they had this big uh TV report where they had these these TV people interview me because uh I had won the state championship a couple years in a row and they were interested in coverage of the Bay State Games. Anyway, I listened to myself on TV and I sounded like such a idiot. I had a VH VHS tape myself and I realized it was the first time I ever heard myself. No, I don't know where it is. There's I I never realized how Canadian I sounded until I saw an interview of mine from like 9796 and I was I was just so earnest and and Canadian. I was just Did you say about Did you say about I did. I did. Do you don't say it anymore? No. Say about. Say it. Say about. Yeah, that's right. You're struggling. I feel the struggle. The only thing I say that's still very Canadian is sorry. I listened to myself when I was 19 in

146:39this this video and I was saying hard like we worked out really hard for this. Oh, I was like that's so funny to me. I can't even picture that. Well, it was was Ken out there too in Boston or Ken was in Boston but again I didn't know him either. Ken was apparently in Boston and he was also doing taekwond do but I didn't know him. But he was born in India. Ken was born in the Philippines. Philippines, I think his sister was born in India. Yeah. He was a military child. Yeah. So he lived all over the place. He lived in Saudi Arabia. Y he lived everywhere. It's a weird way to grow up, man. Yeah. I can't imagine that. Living in a bunch of strange foreign countries. But to be like I mean to be as as wellrounded as he is today is is a testament to him. Yeah. Well, he's super wellrounded as far as like his uh interests. Yeah. He's just, you know, he's a guy. Well, he knows a lot

147:32of Yeah, he knows a lot of about very interesting and and different. Like, he's one of the few guys that I can call up like some bizarre thing that's in the news, I can call up, hey, um, film me on this. Like, what the going on with this? And he'll he'll be able to most likely have some insight. He's got like a pretty broad range of uh topics in his head that he knows quite a bit about. Like, don't ever talk to him about wine. You'll get stuck. Oh, yeah. I can't drink wine anyway. I got acid reflux. No wine for me. What is acid reflux? Uh, it's your body telling you you're a fat and you need to change your diet. Is that what it is? But what does it mean? Does it mean like like you burps come up? Um, well yeah, your burps come I mean it burns just burns to here. So your digestive juices kick back up. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, it's horrible. But you know I'm on and it you know I I've had it

148:22since I was a kid. So, you know, since I was I remember being a six, sevenyear-old having it. No. Is there anything? What do they give you something for it back then? No, now. Now, yeah. I take a stuff called protonics. And what does that stuff do? Um, it just stops it. I don't know what it does exactly, but I know I don't feel any pain when I'm on it, so I'm good with it. You don't feel any pain like you could whack your dick with a hammer? Like that kind of thing? Actually, I'm numb. Numb to the world. Numb to the world. That's what you're looking for. But I can eat pizza and not worry. I drank a whole Mountain Dew. I don't give a Do you um think there's a dietary um Absolutely. When I when I eat properly, it doesn't bother me at all. I could not take medication then. That's interesting. So, you choose to eat like So, you can No, I just do it I do it preventatively now. Uh

149:08just in case. I don't know what the going to trigger it. Wow. So, when it triggers it, it just kicks in. You start getting that burning feeling in your throat. Oh, like you It's kind of like a Yeah. It's like a burn and your eye you burp and your eyes water and like what'll do it to you? Like lasagna? Lasagna kick you down? No. Pizza would take me down. French fries. Anything greasy? Greasy. Uh wine is the worst for me though. Really? Oh my god. That is So right now if we busted out a glass of wine, started cleaning glasses, you just start throwing up. No, no, no. It wouldn't hit me. I'd feel I'd be like, "Oh, it's all right now." And then when I go to bed, the minute I lay down Oh, that's when you feel like That's when it happens, man. Stay up. That's what I'd say. just forever. Don't be a Keep I don't know why I'm not committing to this more. Yeah, man.

149:51You just got to keep partying, bro. I don't know what the side effects are. Can you see what the side effects to protonics are? Cuz I'm pretty sure you got to have some. I heard it's probably short-term memory. I forget. Wow. That was a pun, ladies. That wasn't a pun. What was that? That was It was a Joe. That's what it was. That's all it was. It was How would you categorize that if you're a professional? Weight changes. See m weight changes, nausea, vomiting, mild diarrhea, gas, stomach pain, tired feeling, that's always. Dude, get off this stuff. Jesus Christ. Okay, Jamie, now Google protonics dangers, please. God may long-term use may cause issues, dude. Get off that Oh my god. What are you taking? Comant side effects. FDA sounds alarm on the dangers of ant acid drugs. or is it a side effect of it if it's what you take to to fix it? Click click on quick

150:45uh Chris Crusher's article FDA sounds alarms and dangers of aspir. This is six years ago. This guy's smart as I had him on the podcast. Very very knowledgeable guy. Goddamn your popups. your pop-ups. So, what does it say here? In a shocking shockingly rare example of e FDA actually doing its job, a report a report was issued on Tuesday cautioning against the prolonged use of a class of acid stopping drugs called proton pump inhibitors. Okay, so this is the man. Oh my god. Americans spend $5.1 billion on the most po popular antiaids. That is insane. Holy There's so much money in in drugs. That's what we should have got into. Russell, why are we why are we telling jokes? We could be selling drugs. Well, we're you're busy taking them, so I take the good ones. That's it. That stuff though doesn't seem like a good one. And you take that stuff? I take it twice a day. Take dude, stop taking

151:49that, please. I take it when I wake up and I take it before I go to bed. Can I connect you with a a diet guy that could change your life? Yes. Would you do it? Hell yeah. Yeah. Okay, I'm gonna connect you with a guy. I know a guy that can change your life. Yeah, I need that. Change your life. You changing lives. Would you listen? Would you only eat the stuff that he told you to? If he Yeah, I mean, if I would I'm not an expert, so I would have to listen to what he says. Now, you're a wealthy man. How come you haven't already done this? Um I I do. I try. You got the paper. You got that paper. I try. I try. I I just enjoy food. I enjoy life. I do, too, man. That's the problem. I'm like, you know what? I feel like going off sometimes. Maybe right now like going and getting like a gigantic mushroom and pepperoni pizza. Not give a how seed in my head. You see what you just

152:36did? You planted a seed in my head, Joe. Just perfect. Right off the oven. They slide it out of that oven with that giant spatula and they drop it down into that box. They drop it like it's hot. You just start pulling slices apart and the cheese is hanging all gooey. And you dig in, you taste that tomato sauce and that grease and the the spices and you're just chewing on the carbs, too. And you're just going, "Fuck yeah." Like, I don't need a six-pack. I don't need to be shredded. all that. Give me this pizza right now. I'll take this. That's my problem. That's the problem. The problem is the way you sold it just now. I may stop on the way home. Yeah. I ate a bunch of boring today. All right. I ate nuts, eggs, ate a bunch of boring ass I certainly didn't have a fresh pizza. I had multigrain Cheerios. That's good if you like sugar and things that aren't really good for you, but appear

153:37to be good for you on the box. Yeah, the box. Oh, it's multigrain. They were delicious. You know what? I like pineapple and anchovi pizza. You ever had that? I don't like pineapple on on on food. Oh, and anchovies. Yeah, I'm good. See the two of them together. I know it seems nasty. I know people are listening to me. They're like, "Joe, you need the pineapple to mask the anchovi." No, it doesn't mask it. It all gets busy together. Telling you, it's fantastic. Yeah. I can't do smelling things. But not only that, I go double pineapple, double anchovi. Yeah, I can't do that. I don't give a You just on my pizza dreams. And guess what? You just talked me out of eating pizza. So, here's another one. Maybe there'll be more up your aisle. Jalapenos and sausage. No. See those oxygen bad triggers for me. Oh, don't be a You're taking drugs. I know. Take a drug. Take extra. The gelapinos

154:28and the uh Take your jalapenos. That'll all me sideways. Take your extra medicine. Can't you take like four of those Oh god. You don't want to do that. No. What happens then? I don't know. Find out. Cleans out all your acid. What's happening? Like what is it? How's it stopping that? I don't know. What's it doing? Can't be good. But I've had it since I was a kid. And my parents would just tell me, "Drink milk." That's a good thing to tell people. My mom be like, "Oh, go drink some milk. It'll go away." It's almost like nothing you should drink milk for other than you want milk. Yep. You drink some milk. It'll cool it down. Well, Indians, you know, cuz the sp food's so spicy, they serve a yogurt dish with it. And the yogurt's to Oh, okay. to calm your calm everything down. Um, but I never liked the yogurt as a kid, so I would have to just drink milk. I went to a kids party

155:13recently and uh we uh we pulled up and it was this thing at this uh roller skating place and I was hungry. I was like I got to get something to eat. Find something. Yeah. So right around the corner is this like super authentic Indian like deli slash like lunch place where everything was in Indian and everything was like There was a few things that were in English. No one there was American except for me or no one there was uh you know your standard English- speakaking person except for me. No one knew what the I was saying. Like I was like had to tell this lady I didn't want the nan bread, you know. She just w up giving it to me anyway. But it was the food was sensational. It was really good. All vegetarian Indian food. But I I really felt like I had somehow or another like teleported into another country. I was hanging out with these people. They're

156:07all wearing like Indian clothes. Clothes that would totally identify them as being from India. Everything was they had Indian music playing, Indian TV shows. It sometimes they went deep. They miss the motherland like a time capsule. But the food is so distinct. It's like all the the curries and the different spices and the turmeric and it's a really interesting type of food, man. And depends on which part of India you're eating food from, too. It's very different everywhere. There's a place north, south, east, west. Everybody has their own stuff. Yeah, there's a place on Ventur. Where's Where's the best Indian restaurant in LA? Is there a one spot? I really I have a spot that I used to go to in Studio City called It used to be called Great India Cafe and they just changed the name and I forgot what they changed the name to, but the restaurant's still there. There's one in

156:58and it's pretty damn good. Woodland Hills on Ventur that's really good. I might have been to that one. Anabar or something like that. Like down down closer to the 101 area. Yes. Closer to like Calabasas. Yeah. I think that place is really good. Is it a little strip plaza? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's not bad, dude. To me, it's really good. I don't know though. I want I want you to school me in the ways of the authentic. I'm going to have My mom taught my fiance how to uh make her food the her way, and she makes it amazingly. Really? So, uh if you're into it, I will have you and I'll have you and wifey over. Let's do it. Come on. Um, there was the place that I went to that I told you that was super authentic Indian, but it was all vegetarian. Is that common? Yes. Cuz there's a second place that I found is big over there. The second place that I found that's

157:45like a super authentic uh there's another one in Kenoga Park that's real similar. It's like a like a super like a market rather and then they also serve food there, but it's all vegetarian. Vegetarian is more common than not in India. Really? Yeah. You have to specify. They'll they'll put on the outside veg and nonveg. Hm. And then on airplanes when they order their food, then they screw it up. Um, madam, I am a vegetable. My wife is also a vegetable. Oh, that's what they say. Yeah. Yeah. But it's good to hear. Why is that that Indian is so predominantly vegetarian? Um, it just always has been historically. I mean, you know, they I think they revere animals quite a bit and they also don't have the uh they can't really facilitate um storing meat, you know, so people don't have refrigerators and stuff. Right. Right. That makes sense. It's easier to hang on to the

158:33vegetables. But there are some dishes like uh like there's one that has Rogan in it. Lamb Roen Jo. Roen jo. Oh yeah, that is good. That is good. Oh my god. That place in Woodland Hills. I've had it there. Extra spicy. Oh my god. Roen jo is damn good. You say josh. Yeah. Yeah. Um but that's a meat dish. Is that like a very just a small amount of those meat dishes in the Indian? No. No. There's a lot of meat dishes. It's just, you know, more often than not you'll fe you'll find it's probably easier to find a vegetarian Indian restaurant than it would be to find a meat one. I wonder if unless you go from like North India, North Indians tend to eat a lot more meat. I wonder if there's a direct connection. I mean, India's always had like an issue with Pakistan. They've been involved in conflicts before, but overall when people think about Indian people, people from India, they think of

159:21them as not being like warlike. They think of being pretty peaceful people, right? I wonder if there's a correlation between between that and the massive amount of people eating plants only. Um I wonder I don't know. It's a possibility. They are very uh you know they have always been big on meditating and and yoga obviously is ours and and centering yourself and eating hash. eating hash and you go deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep deep into the records they have some really crazy ancient writings man on vimmanus this flying saucer talk and and some of the the old Sanskrit's the mother of all European languages is it? Mhm. Yeah. You're from a pretty cool place, huh? It's not too shabby. It's pretty badass when you stop and think about all the No. Oh, you'd love it. All the cool that's been from India. Like that's a very unique part of the world.

160:18Yeah, I think you'd really enjoy it out there. You got to get rid of those tigers before I go visit. Not into that. Your dad can do that. I'm not not going to be there for that. Not for the tigers. I used to have this bit in my act about a real thing that happened on the Sunderbands where this tiger jumped into the river, swam up to a boat that had five fishermen in it and killed one at a time. killed three guys, grabbed him, bit him, dragged him into the water, pulled him to shore, killed him, jumped back in the water, swam back out to the boat, grabbed the next guy, pulled him to shore. None of these guys thought about they couldn't do anything. They were trying to row. They couldn't row faster than the tiger can swim. They swam faster than five guys can row and then then four guys can row and then then three guys could row. So there's two guys left. Two guys survived and

161:05three out of the five were killed by the same tiger who's kept swimming out to the boat and jacking them and then swimming to shore with them. Yeah. To him it was like being at a party and the ordurve of tray was coming. Oh, I'll get another one of those please. He chased it down. I mean that what a terrible And the third one he was like, you know, I really shouldn't. But okay. Oh, I really wish I saved that video of the tiger running at the guy cuz it turns off at the last minute. And I think they fire a gun and scare it, but it it's running at him at an impossible rate of speed. Like you see it running, you just it it forces your your brain to reprocess how fast you can get out of the way. Yeah. Like I think we like to think like, "Oh, if something's coming at me, bro, I get out of there. I run so fast." Yeah. You I you know, I always think about like a dogger or

161:53something or even if a coyote came at me, I'm like, "I punch it in the face." You know, you're like, it's not just going to sit there and let you punch it in the face. You know, you start you start your tough guy kicks in and then your reality kicks back in, you know. Well, that's what people think they could do to each other, too. Yeah. You know, guys are always thinking, "Yeah, this guy was looking at you. I saw him looking at you. I'm just going to go over there and that guy up." And you think in your head, I got a plan here and I'm going to say something and I'm going to hit him with one of these and that's going to be the end of that. And then when it's not, when the guy like moves his head then hits you with a jab and kicks you in the balls, you're like, "Oh no, what have I done?" Yes. Always. And then you get beat up by his friends, but you have in your head you

162:34have this thing that tiger's gonna run at me and I'm gonna get the out of the way. Like the like the guys that tried to fight Nick Diaz in the in the bathroom. Yeah, what a great idea. smart plan, stupid. You know, next time you're going to mouth off somebody, look at their ears first. Just look at his eyes, man. Yeah, he's got scar tissue all over his eyebrows. Wouldn't you just assume that that guy's been in some Well, they're just drunk dummies. You got a lot of those in this world. Yeah, it doesn't make sense. Even when I'm drunk, I'm not that stupid. That's why you're Russell Peters. You're not one of those dummies. We need those guys, too, Russell. It's true that we need to balance out the ecosystem for now. We just got to raise the level of dummy, you know, because the level of dummy today, if you take the average dummy, like even those guys that got in a fight with Nick Diaz, if

163:21you take those guys and drop them off in the caveman days, they'd be running They'd be the smartest guy in the room. They'd be able to take, "Listen, listen. You guys don't know You don't know what you're doing. First of all, we got to make some shelter. We can't rely on this cave. The bears know where the cave is." Okay? Come on, guys. Come with me. They'd figure out tools. Like, you guys haven't even figured out tools yet. We got to make the foremans. They'd be the foreman. If you could get one of those dummies and bring them back to the point before monkey people invented tools and he could start making tools, he would be the king, right? Well, that's that's what's happening. It's just that was only a million years ago. So evolution is not like all of a sudden now we're at 10. No, there's still people at 6. That guy's at 6. Yeah, that's that's what people really

164:02think evolution is a it's an even playing field. Yeah. Everyone's like, "Well, then how come?" I'm like, "Because you're an idiot, that's why. It's an even playing field." Yeah. Well, people don't want to admit that that life isn't fair, you know, in in a bunch of different ways. It's definitely not fair physically. If you think it's fair fair physically, go try wrestling LeBron James. Just grab him. Just just want to feel how helpless you are. Just feel feel what it feels like if a NFL lineman grabs you by your neck and just feel feel how vulnerable you actually are in relationship to how you appear that you are or how you think that you are. Yeah. What you envision for yourself. This world ain't fair at all. People have that uh and And what's what's the word I'm looking for where they the way they the way they see themselves is not really the way they are. You know, when I look in the

164:56mirror, I still see a 25-year-old Russell Peters. But then when I get honest with myself, like, ah, what the happened there, kid? You got to stay drunk. Stay drunk and keep moving. Sometimes that's the answer. A lot of people will tell you introspection, yoga, isolation tank. You can go that way or stay drunk and keep moving. Like I love people that do both. Like Stan Hope's one of my favorites. Stays drunk, keeps moving. Same with Hunter Thompson. Stay drunk, kept moving. You still got your isolation tank? Yes, I do. How often? You want to go in it? I do. When? I really do. Say the word. Any You tell me. Whenever you're home. Come on over, dude. We'll make it happen. You're not far from me. No, we'll make it happen, dude. It's you you'll love it. So relaxing and when you get out of there you go, whoa, that's it, huh? Yeah. Yeah, that's it. That I really want to

165:47do. Body feels real good. Loosens up everything. Yeah, I need that just to shut shut off the world. Do you have a spot in your house where you could put one? Um, no. No. Can you got a Can you build like a little shack? I could. Yeah, should do that. I'm going to wait till I move and then I'll do it cuz then I'll have a man cave that that I can do it in. Oh, man cave. Yeah, you want ideally the best move would be if you had a bathroom that you could sacrifice. If you had a house and I know you're baller, so you're going to get a nice house. Um, if you have a house and you could sacrifice one of your bathrooms, set it up in there so that you have the shower that's right there. It's already set up for plumbing and all that jazz and uh have like the guys from Float Lab set it up. You will value it so much. It's so it's such a nice place to just chill and think about

166:39and reflect. How long do you do it? The least I do is an hour usually, but I will jump in if I only have 40 minutes and I said I just want to get in there right now. I I will jump in and do like 40 minutes if I know I have to go somewhere. But honestly, that is contrary to what it's good for. What it's good for is like the end of the day for me. Like when everybody's asleep and I can get in that thing, I can just just totally remove myself. Do you fall asleep in there? No, never. I don't think so. Maybe when I jerk off. I don't do that. Um but the salt stings, stings, stings, stings. Um you can for sure. I have a hard time uh falling asleep laying on my back though cuz I got sleep apnnea. So if I do have I think I've developed it. Yeah, I know. I snore like a motorcycle now. Yeah, it's super common, man. Yeah, super common. A lot of people have it. Really with

167:30your sleep, man. You should do something about that. Sometimes I'll take an Advil cold and sinus before I go to bed. Does it help? Yeah, because it opens up my airways. You want to take a pill, guys? Huh? Not really, actually. We got to fix you. Yeah. This is what we're going to do. God damn it. First of all, no working out with that Manny Pacquiao trainer anymore. Guy's going to break you. You go to Equinox and get a goddamn regular trainer like a gentleman. I just want to get small. I He was making me big. I got like I I was way healthier, I guess. I don't know. But uh you know, and now when I laugh, I could feel my core is really good in there, but there's a lot of on top of this core right now. Well, I can help you with that. I I got a guy I'm going to connect you with with that. If you follow his diet, it will without a doubt clean you up. We're going to make that happen. Russell

168:16Peters, if you're really my lady loves to cook for me, so she'll cook whatever we tell her to make. It's going to be hard, though. The real way to get your body to lose weight is you got to get off the carbs and the sugar. Yes. And those are the most addictive things in the in the world. Oh, I know. The key is don't torture yourself relentlessly. Like every now and then you got to give yourself a break. Yeah. You give yourself a little reward. When I was training with Arza, I I would get a one day cheat day. Yeah. I would go nuts on that day, though. What'd you have? Oh, man. I would have pizza. I would go to I went to Tommy's. I had chili cheese fries. I had uh double cheeseburgers. Like this is in one day, you know, I was going in cake, ice cream, I went in on everything. You know my friend Eddie Bravo, right? Of course. Know when Eddie Bravo used to be on the

169:03Atkins diet. Mhm. And then uh he went from the Atkins diet every day to he would have like a Sunday and Sunday would be his cheat day. And then Sunday started started um kicking in around Saturday at midnight. Yeah. Yep. That's it. And so then he said, "Well, it, man. If it's Saturday at midnight, why don't I just do the whole weekend? I don't want to I don't want to worry about this. Let me start I'll start it. I'll I'll start the cheat day on Friday. So he went Friday, Saturday. So it was basically four days at But when he did one day, when he did one day, he was legendary with what he would throw down. I mean, he would eat stacks of pancakes. He would eat bowls of ice cream, cheeseburgers, pizza. He would go off. I mean, just go off. And he would do it with such lust like a guy who had been depriving himself for six days. That's exactly how it was. It was it was very therapeutic.

169:56Like what is the most disgusted you ever felt with yourself on a cheat day? Oh, it it was that was the the first cheat day is when I went in cuz I had Yeah. I went to IHOP for breakfast and had the country fried steak with scrambled eggs and cheese and then I had the pancakes and then later on I had pizza as a snack. Oh my god. And then I had went to Tommy's cuz I cuz Five Guys was too far cuz I really wanted Five Guys that day. Dude, I had chicken fried steak in Montana. Would they really know how to make it like rancher style with the country fried gra? Oh, yeah. This is so good, though. It was a glorious cheat meal. It was smothered in this this delusious gravy. See, you don't get that from healthy food. No, I know. You don't get that feeling. There's a there's a crazy carb load feeling that you get. Mhm. It's a It's a weird warmth. It's a good warmth. A bowl of spaghetti with

170:54meatballs. Like when you're sucking down that I'm a big fan of the fetuccini alfredo with the chicken and but I usually use pennet noodles because I uh don't want to be slapped in the face with fetuccini noodles. That's a good move. That's a good move as well. I'm particularly fond of linguini with clams with white sauce done correctly. No can defend. There's there's no takedown defense to the linguini with clams. You know what else is really good, man? Um, lobster fraud diablo with linguini. I do not know this. Oh my goodness. You're half Italian. You know this. Spicy. Three quarters. Three quarters. One quarter Irish. Yeah. It's a spicy uh spicy tomato sauce with lobster and spaghetti. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. Russell Peters. So good. I think you're going to have a cheat day today. You have it with garlic bread and you uh you you put some Parmesan cheese on top of it. Just some

171:55grated Parmesan on top of that God damn, that's good. It's so good. People tell you they uh you never should put cheese on seafood. Like if you get linguini with clams, they tell you not to put the cheese on. And often times if you go to a proper Italian restaurant, they won't give it to you. They get mad at you if you try to try to put cheese on that linguini clam sauce. Those people are They don't know Italians are very clam. Yeah. They're very protective of the way things are done. I in Toronto, the Italians are first generation, so everybody speaks Italian and and they are very Italian. And I love Italian sandwiches and they get so mad when I walk into the Italian store. They're happy to see me at first. Hey, hey. And then I pick the bread and then they go, "What do you want on it?" I go, "Uh, do you have any gluten-free pasta?" No. I go, "You're going to get mad. I

172:44need butter on the bread. A they get what? And then I go and then then I pick the meats and they're like, "All right, that's it." And I go, "Can I get some mayonnaise on that, too?" Ah, for sake. You want me to on the bread, too? They get so mad. They literally ask me, "If you want me to on your sandwich, too, cuz you're it up, kid." Well, how can they do that when they're asking you what what they like on it? That's one way Subway superior. Subway does not give you a hard time for your choices. You know, you could just say salami with hot peppers. They're like, "Okay." And that's why it's Subway, not Subway. Oh. Oh. All right. But, uh, Kevin James and I went to this, uh, Italian restaurant once, and we both wanted linguini with clams with the cheese. And it was like, you going to ask for the cheese? I'm going to ask for the cheese. Okay, I'll ask for the cheese if you ask for the

173:32cheese. Cuz they don't want to give it to you. They want to give you the linguini with clams. And if you have a dish right next training with Eddie, Kevin James. Uh, no, not right now. Why? I know he was training for a bit then. Well, he's he's he has done a lot of training with Boss Root. Oh, that's right. With Boss. And uh he did some stuff with Ray Longo. Like Kevin's actually a really accomplished martial artist. He's actually he's got really good hands, very good kicks. Like he's a real martial artist, you know? He's a big guy, but he he can hit hard. Like it's kind of surprising. If you ever see him hit the bag or hit the pads with Mark Delgrat, it's pretty impressive. Like, you know, I mean, he doesn't look like a professional fighter, but he's a very confident a competent rather uh martial artist. But didn't want to ask for that cheese. Neither did I. Gotta keep that cheese

174:16coming. But if you were right next to me and you asked red sauce and meatballs, they would offer you the cheese. Would you like some cheese? So you'd make somebody order that on the side just to No, you you would be right next to me and you would offer you the cheese and they would walk away and I'd be like, "What about me?" And like, "Sir, we do not recommend the cheese for this cuz it would be too delicious." Yeah. You wouldn't be able to handle it. Yeah. We don't want your euphoria. Uh well, they have a very specific taste that you want to take in. They want you to take in the taste of the noodles, the olive oil, the spices, and the clams. That's it. It's perfection. Take it in. Take it in like that. You're like, "No, I need to add my own perfection to this perfection." Cheese on this You got any ketchup? Oh, my daughter my daughter loves the cheese, too. So, she'll be

174:59like, when I make her a little pasta, she'll be like, "Daddy, can I put the cheese?" And then she takes it and just dumps it on there. Kids love cheese. It tastes good. Plus, it's rewarding you some sort of weird lactose way. It's giving you some weird very slow chill. Helping the bones. Help in the bones. Yeah, supposedly. Right. Calcium. Yeah. But cheese cheese is way better when it's raw. You ever have raw cheese? Uh the No, I have not. I've been getting into raw cheese. The curds you made? No, raw cheese. Like get cheese from a place that uses raw milk. Mhm. Um I've been getting into that and drinking raw milk. I've been drinking a lot of raw milk lately. You don't need goats milk. No, I have I have drinking raw goats milk, but no, you just raw cow's milk. You can get it from uh some some sustainable farms and um some like airw though, right? Yeah. It tastes

175:48delicious, dude. It's so much better. It goes down easier. Like regular milk feels weird. And one of the reasons why regular milk feels weird is because it's homogenized and pasteurized and apparently there's enzymes in milk that when you're boiling the milk to treat it and make it sort of last longer and so it doesn't have any disease in it, you're killing all the good stuff too. So your body's drinking this weird liquidy protein. It doesn't exactly know what to do with. It's like doing chemotherapy on milk. Kills everything. A lot of it. Yeah. In a lot of ways it is. Yeah. It's just boiling the out of it. But when you don't have it that way, when you just have cold raw milk, it's way better. It tastes better. It feels smooth when it goes down. It's one thing that people uh um comment on when they drink it. They're like, "Wow, it's really smooth." Like cuz it's got all

176:34the stuff in it that you're supposed to drink. And people tell you like, "Oh, you're not supposed to drink animals milk." No, it tastes a little different. It tastes better to me. To me, I think it tastes better. I mean, some people might Some people like lowfat milk. I think that shit's disgusting. I'd rather just drink water. Low-fat milk tastes weird. Coffee. I like to put half and half. I like that, too. Mhm. This is getting to a what do I like show? Yeah, I do like me some. Welcome to the Joe Rogan Experience where we're talking about coffee and things we like in it. So, back when there was like milkman delivering milk every day, would it have been your wife? Yeah, that's what I was going to say. Maybe raw milk because they had to do it all the time because Oh, it was 100% raw milk. Probably. I wonder when they came up with the homogenation process.

177:17Homogenation once they did come up with the pasteurization. That's Louis Pastor. You got to That's interesting. I wonder how much of that was raw and how much of it was pasteurized and when they started doing that on a big scale. But it's it's imperative if you want to like keep it on the shelf. Like you're not going to be able to keep raw milk on the shelf for very long. Cuz I've had it in my house for just a couple of days and it noticeably goes bad in the refrigerator. Not bad to where you can't drink it, but to where it it's like, "Wow, this is on the door of getting funky." I have to text my ex-wife cuz I got to pick up my daughter. What do you got there, Jamie? I found a weird milk milestones of milk history of the US. In 1950 there was milk vending machines. Whoa. But uh but when did they start? Trying to find out there's a lot of first compulsory pasteurization law

178:07in Chicago applying to milk except that except that from tuberculin tested cows 1908 1908 tuberculin. H what is that? Is that is that tuberculosis every day? Is that brucyosis? Is that brucyosis? is brucyosis is something that cows get that I know um it's like uh one of the uh main concerns about uh different wildlife populations mingling especially buffalo like some buffalo have uh brucyosis and they can get it to cows says 1919 homogenized milk was sold successfully for the first time in Connecticut and then a couple more years passed by before uh let's see first farm built first farm Bulk tanks for milk began replacing milk cans in 1938 and then every other day milk delivery started in 42 and then it was added to school lunches in 46. Yeah, but when it was in 42 was that homogenized and pasteurized milk when they started initially as a war conservation measure. H I wonder if they

179:15do it every day and you have an ice box in your house you probably don't have to. That's kind of crazy though. They relied on a guy to come by with the milk. Like that's how everybody got their milk. Also people's lifespans life expecties were a lot shorter back then. It was. So, is this a good thing or a bad thing that we did? Um, they were shorter then. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's because people didn't understand medicine or vitamins. True. Talking 1930. Yeah. They just knocked you over the head when they had to do surgery. Yeah. My dad had scurvy when he was a kid. No way. For real? Yeah. No, not scurvy. Uh, ricketetts. He had ricketetts. He had ricketetts. What does that come from? I don't know. Nutrition or something. He's had it when he was a baby and then it stunted his growth. So, he only became like five at his tallest maybe 5'3, 5'4. I think when

180:02we get older um in our lifetimes, there's going to come a point in time where they they'd laugh at people being uh sick or people being injured. I think they're going to be able to repair bodies perfectly. They're going to be able to regenerate limbs. Within the next 50, 100 years, there's probably going to be so many crazy advancements to medical science. We're going to look back on injuries and the treatment of injuries the way we do it today. Well, that's I think you know once they get the that stem cell right. Have you had any of that yet? No. I you know when I was in India last year on tour, this guy gave me some um like uh face stuff to give you a facial. Yeah. He he was really friendly. And I just stood there. He gave me some sort of oil to rub on my face that had stem cells in it. Probably Yeah. And he was like, "Oh, you're going to see it's going to have an immediate

180:54effect." And I was like, "Call me, bro. I'd love to do business with you." And then I did it for like two months. And I was like, "Nope, nothing." All it did was give me a couple of pimples. That's all it did. Yeah. It's probably Yeah. The real stem cell They got to inject in you. They have to keep it cold. Yeah. It's Yeah. I It didn't do anything for me. We're gonna be I think the first group of people to see people live like deep into the hundreds. I think it's going to be real weird. Like what is a 200year-old healthy person going to be like? How strange is it going to be if they really figure out a way to regenerate tissue and keep someone in a relatively healthy state and you get to see like the wisdom of someone that's 2, 300 years old? Cuz like you're 40, what' you say you were? 46. 46. How much smarter are you than when you were 26? Whole lot. A whole

181:43lot. Right. Whole lot. If you live to be 146, how much smarter would you be than you now? As long as you're coherent. What if you looked exactly the same? That'd be pretty awesome. That'd be strange. That'd be strange but awesome. Did you feel guilty if you were getting at 146? Nope. I was getting when I was fighting at 147 back in the day. I uh um I think it's if they can they can get the HGH thing right and make it cancer free. I think that there's a possibility. There's no correlation between HGH and cancer. the correlations between abuse of HGH and some issues and also cancer with a bunch of different factors, environmental factors, factors like diet, factors like heredity, there's a bunch of different but there's a concern that if you are supplementing with human growth hormone and a cancer grows in your body that it could grow more. That is a concern, but I don't think there's any

182:45real evidence to support that concern that I've ever read. But what's interesting about cancer that I've been reading a lot about is when you get your body to if you get your body to a place where it's used to a bunch of different chemicals that are that are in the environment whether it's pollutants or whether it's uh you know and uh something that you work with like like people that work around like really strong chemicals people that work like with automotive stuff like uh all the bond condos and epoxies and all that. Like those people their cancer numbers get whenever you work with a lot of chemicals, your cancer numbers get crazy high. Like that seems to be where the big risk is is diet and people that work around chemicals. There's a lot of people that are out there that they just took a job because it's a good job and it pays well, but you're in like a slow death sentence.

183:44Absolutely. That sucks, man. That's got to be the weirdest way to make a living to be trapped in a in a gig where your very job itself is slowly chewing away your body. Well, you were doing comedy in the 90s as well and remember going to clubs on the for the whole weekend and be full of smoke. Oh, yeah. I remember I remember just leaving gigs. I would be just it you wreak. You couldn't wear the same clothes twice. You couldn't you had to shower as soon as you got back home. And often times you didn't realize it until you open up your bag, right? Yeah. You open up your clothes take your clothes out when you got home and you're like, "What the fuck?" They just stunk like cigarettes. But cigarettes, if you're a waitress, it's the worst. Directly in the line of fire with them then. And you're there all the time. Like in the days when they used to be able to smoke in bars. I bet

184:30a lot of chicks got uh a lot of waitresses got uh cancer from secondhand smoke. Yeah. I just remember And the worse the gig, the more the smoke for some reason. It's just crazy. That wasn't that long ago. It really wasn't. Wasn't I remember when they banned smoke must have been around 2000 maybe 99 maybe at the latest. Yeah. The weird improvements like that that happened that are pretty goddamn significant at the time. People are protesting like we want to smoke in bars. We know we want There was I remember people complaining saying that pool halls were going to go out of business because they wouldn't allow people to smoke in them anymore. People had to stand outside to smoke. And in the old days everybody smoked indoors. It's weird gross planes. Remember that? You know Fitz Simmons, right? Yeah. Fitz Simmons parents were um chain smokers when he was a kid and

185:23they lived in Boston so it's in the winter and uh the windows are closed locked down and they are smoking in the house chain smoking with the kids. Greg gets asthma. He's got asthma from this. Uh they'd be in the car going on a road trip smoking in the car windows. My friend's father smoked. He would do that in the car. Winter time wouldn't roll down the window. it. It's too cold. Make everybody breathe your smoke. Is there any habit like that where you force the consequences of your habit on other people? Maybe alcoholism. Imagine if you dated someone and they farted on you so much your clothes smelled like farts. You'd be like, "God, she just keeps farting. She's always farting on me." I like that. And we blamed it on her. Well, I'm saying if you dated someone. I'm saying if you dated someone. I mean, I'm assuming you're not dating any dudes. No, not at

186:11all. But if you were dating a dude and the dude just farted all over you, be you come home, you're like, "Mike, we can't anymore." Every time I take my clothes out of the bag, I smell farts. I bring it home, people go, "Was somebody farting on you?" Yeah, Mike was farting all over me. I'm surprised. I'm surprised my my lady doesn't smell like farts. I rip on her all night while we're sleeping. He's addicted to farts. And on her leg, too. She doesn't even flinch. She was like, "Hey, boy. She doesn't flinch when you fart on her." She's like, "You're alive, huh?" Wow. You just fart on her. Well, it's not like I'm trying to. I just You guys talk about it. Um, does it come up? She kind of giggles about it. So, wow. She's a trooper. She is a trooper. Thug life. Yeah. That's not good. Farting on people. But it but it's essentially what people were doing with cigarette smokes,

186:56right? It was just getting in your clothes and you were smelling like cigarette smoke. You were you were making people smell like what you were into. Yeah. and and and whatever disease you were uh susceptible to, so are you now. Yeah. It doesn't smell as bad as a fart, but it's just it's as obnoxious. It's in the neighborhood, right? It's like a a hard left from a fart, but it's still gross. Like, yeah, but it doesn't smell like right? No. A fart is, as George Carin said, without the mess. Is that what he said? Let's end it on that. That's the perfect way to end this thing. Powerful George Carlin from Beyond the Grave gets the best line of the show. Hilarious. Powerful. Powerful Russell Peters. Thank you very much for coming in here, dude. It was fun. Thanks, Joe. Appreciate it. And uh Indian food. We're going to make it happen, right? Yeah, definitely. The

187:48real deal. Real deal. Okay. Bread. Garlic naan bread. Is that the real deal or is that American? That's that. No, that's North Indian. You need to make that right. Otherwise, it's just your Otherwise, you're getting the North American one. Okay. You need a special oven for that. This podcast is over. See you next week, Thought we did what we could.