Moment 146: 3 Simple Steps That Guarantees Ultimate Happiness (Jay Shetty's Happiness Model)

00:03Over the years I've tried to kind of simplify what happiness is and I sit here with my guests and mogara was great at that as well. Yeah. of course. he was unbelievable at kind of the concept of happiness. What are the kind of simple fundamentals that Jay shetty requires in his life to live a happy life and I'm going to use the word happy. I know it's a shitty word in many respects but I just want to use that as the the word yeah. I I'd say that I look at happiness as. Daily habits and then deeper purpose. So there's things you can do daily that keep that happiness kind of moving and feel it's growing and then there's almost the objective, the compass, the reason why you live and why you exist and for me it's been really clear that.

00:52Finding your passion and using it in the service of others is what creates the greatest, deepest happiness when you find what you love, what you excel at, what you're brilliant at, and then you can actually use that to improve people's lives and you can use that skill, that passion, that energy to make a difference in someone's life. There is no better feeling than that. And what I find is I meet a lot of people who've mastered their passion but not for service.

01:23They mastered it for business, they mastered it for money, they mastered it for success and they have all of that, but they haven't got the service element in their life. They don't understand how to use their passion for a purpose and so they feel unequipped. And then I know lots of people who are trying to serve or trying to make a difference or trying to do charity work. They're trying to do all this good work and they feel good about it, but they still don't. Feel fulfilled because they're missing what is my special role? Like what's my position? What's my offering in this space? You kind of get lost after a while. And so to me happiness is where both come together, where it's like I know what I love and what makes me happy and when I do that for others to improve their lives, it makes them happy.

02:08So if you can do what makes you happy and do it for others and it makes them happy, that's going to give you happiness and I have. Tested that principle time and time again with clients, with friends, with family, with myself and I've seen it to be true again and again and again. But. that's that bigger happiness piece. Let's go to the daily habits, like the daily stuff and I want to try and avoid the stuff that I think people have heard and people have probably come across before in many different places. Maybe I've spoken about them, maybe other people have. But one of the biggest ones for me is I read a book a few years ago about flow state and that book really transformed how I felt about things, and it talks about how being in flow is the intersection where your skills and your challenge match.

02:54So if your skills are higher than your challenge, you' will feel bored, lethargic, and maybe feel stuck, but if your challenge is greater than your skills, you feel overwhelmed. Potentially depressed and disconnected and disappointed. So most of us are living in one of those discrepancies, and I find on a daily basis I'm playing around with that equation for happiness, because that flow state of when you know you have a skill and your challenge is met and even if you lose, you still get such a joy out of it because you know that you're still working in the right direction. And I think that is an underplayed part of happiness because it doesn't sound like something predictable or obvious because people go, well that's achievement, that's ambition. It's actually not, it's just saying.

03:42For most people it's either or. Their challenges are greater than their skill or their skills greater than their challenge. So I would ask everyone to say, look at your life. Do you need to improve your skills or do you need to broaden your challenge? Is this a year of expanding your challenges or is this a year of broadening your skills? And I promise you, if you start with that, you're going to get so busy and active changing one of those, that happiness is going to naturally flow. This comes into a little, little model I created of creating happiness for my year and that one sits in one of them, so I'll explain which one it's in I believe that to create happiness day to day, in one year, in one month, in a week, you have to have. Three things. You have to learn something every year. You have to launch something every year and you have to love something every year.

04:35And that's how I've lived for the last three to five years. Every year I'm learning something, every year I'm launching something, and every year I'm loving something. And I'll give you an example. So when I talk about flow state that comes into the idea of raising your challenge is like launching something. The reason why launching something creates happiness is because it creates a feeling of nervousness. It creates a feeling of butterflies. It creates a feeling of excitement like I don't know what's going to happen. We all need a feeling of surprise in life. We all need that feeling of, I don't know of the sense of the unknown can actually cause happiness.

05:13And so launching something is such a powerful way, and I think too many people will think for five years and think for 10 years and maybe launch one thing in their whole life and me and you have, but I mean I'd love to, I can't wait to interview on my podcast but I have launched so much stuff that is fair. we're gonna get into that yeah. but that launch creates so much joy, it creates so much happiness so launch something and we can dive into that. Then there's learn something which is what we just talked about learning a skills. So that's the that's the idea of creating your flow state by saying what skill do I want to learn and every year I pick a skill, and it's usually based on what I want to launch the next year. So I'll go okay I need to learn podcasting. So 2018I studied podcasting 2019 we launched the podcast.

05:54Uh so what you learn turns in what to what you launch, and what you launch turns into what you love and what we try and do is we try and do it the other way around. We try and love something before we learn and launch. It doesn't make sense. You've got to learn about something first. And then you can fall in love with it. You can't love something and then learn about it. You can, but it doesn't always work that way. So I try and plan my years out in that way. I go, what am I going to learn? What am I going to launch? And what am I going to love? So yeah, I think that's how I try and create happiness on a daily, weekly, monthly basis without diving into things like gratitude and meditation, which are huge parts of my daily happiness. But I think those are ideas that are out there and that we've talked about before probably.