Brendan Schaub

00:03the joe rogan experience train by day joe rogan podcast by night all day it's tough to keep up with that nft shit yeah i bet i bet jamie's into it we're up and running jamie's into it jamie uh is aware but you're not investing you've got like a few weird ones you got more i have one of the big ones what do you got i have a mutant ape which is not the biggest i'm not gonna i'm not gonna put it out there it's the biggest but one of the big ones okay how's that a big one oh by the way this vodka or excuse me this whiskey you have this uh tight was it tiger thick tiger thick it's very good thank you i was surprised thank you i was ready for some bullshit last night when you busted it out i was like because i got an offer there was a thing that was going on with me cheers brother very good to see you love you too thank

00:59you great to see you but uh i've been you know people have like sent me stuff like try this out would you like to get involved i'm like oh i don't know i don't think this is good enough this is good this is legit it's like it tastes aged it tastes like which it is yeah yeah 10 years japanese aged whiskey it's the first blend of japanese whiskey american bourbon it took three years just to get the licenses from the the alcohol companies in the united states was such a beast and then you're talking about years of trial and error trying what i like what i don't it was fun though man you nailed it though thanks it's very good smooth it's it's smooth but it's different yes sir it's like uh it's a it's a different taste you're i mean i'm not a i'm not like a whiskey wizard i don't really under like barnett is barnett knows a lot about whiskey he took a sip of it and i was like jesus christ he's

01:50like there's caramel you can taste i'm like what what excuse me caramel did i ever tell you the time i went on a fucking wine tasting dinner with my uh my friend matt no my friend matt's a like a legit wine connoisseur so much so that he he had a birthday and on his on his birthday he had this wine tasting dinner and you would get like a flight of wines with each plate so it was like a fancy restaurant so they bring like a little tiny little piece of something i've done like napa yeah trying and yes it's not my thing i can't believe you went on my thing yeah my friend it was his birthday i love him to death so anyway i wind up uh meeting this guy there and then years later i'm watching this documentary about this guy that ripped off all these wine connoisseurs by taking cheap wine and blending it up and putting in fake old bottles and that was the guy i met at

02:48the fucking wine party was it really yes yeah and they were they couldn't tell the difference they're saying the same shit with the cheap wine the fancy wine the way this guy fucked up is it's good the movie's called sour grapes and the way the guy fucked up is he ripped off one of the coke brothers which is like not a smart move yeah those guys got all the money they got some capital yeah yeah and they know how to move and uh he this guy had bought like i think it was like more than a million dollars worth of fake wine from him hilarious brian's brian counten same way he loves wine but does he know it does he understand he really does you know yeah don't get me wrong he says a lot of bullshit to make us laugh but when it comes to wine he knows it and when i first started hanging with brian was this

03:2710 years ago around la you know it'd be him he like you know he hangs around smart people and i i would feel so stupid i'd hang out with him but i'd watch him try wine and i'd pick up on things they would say i'm like oh i'm gonna use that next time and so dude we're at scopa italian roots in la and there's like all these fancy people and they hand me the wine and you know i'm swirling i have no idea what i'm doing i'm just got me i'm swirling i take a sip i go that's earthy that is and it worked like it is earthy i was like oh my god you guys are fucking out of control earthy that's my go-to earthy i like wine that tastes good i really can't put a i've been drinking wine for decades i don't know what's going on i just go oh this is i like this this is good but to say this is funny with the whiskey it's crazy i have my own whiskey now i didn't drink my entire life dude being an athlete

04:20doing never nothing drugs didn't touch it college football didn't fucking touch it and then uh i don't know if you remember this i was getting ready to do a set at the comedy store and i was so nervous and we're i was in the back bar and you come here what are you doing i was like i think i had to follow up fucking joey diaz i get like the worst you know uh spot and i was so nervous and like dude take a shot you put too much pressure take five i'm like dude i don't drink like just take a shot it was like jack you know nothing great and then i took it and i was like yeah that's good i enjoyed that and i go out there had a like my best set ever for me at the time and then you know i believe in superstition so then i was like i'm just keep doing this next thing you know you know i got a bomb i get my own whiskey now i drink every night

05:03during the pandemic i had a legit problem because i got so into yellowstone oh yeah i got so into bro i'm on season two oh i just got in oh dude and rip dude i got so into it if dude me and my girl every night i would binge watch that i'd put on a cowboy hat i would go through a bottle of skin knife i mean i'm surprised you didn't start looking at land in montana i did and i if we go on vacation there now because that show it's like how many fucking people moved to montana because that show it's not a small number and i bet people in montana like god damn it you've ruined it for us yeah they're particularly um proud of montana like montana people are particularly proud and also like they claim montana this is our state i remember i went hunting there once and this guy wrote on someone's car something like in the dirt of someone's car like someone had like foreign plates

06:03foreign meaning another state foreign and uh the guy wrote you know like fuck off from someone montana born and raised all right dude like just because the guy had a plate bro i've never gotten so much hate uh when i was uh where was i i was in spokane spokane but i stayed in cordelaine oh you crossed the line yeah you went over to idaho went went to cordelaine which is like you know i don't know an hour and cordelaine if you've ever been there's gorgeous gorgeous like the kardashians over case they didn't like it dude it's um an amazing place during the height of the pandemic out there they didn't give a fuck there was nothing no mass nothing it's idaho people dude they didn't give a fuck but i go back on my show the following week and i was talking about cordelaine how great it is we've never got so

06:47many hate emails from people that live in cordelaine hey bitch don't be telling everybody man we don't want all you guys here like like leave the place like this talk about wrong reaction because now you're talking about here now more people can hear yeah now i'm getting even more hate from cordelaine just don't read it but also be cool cordelaine you know what i'm saying be cool it's a big commitment to move somewhere cordelaine it's not like there's industry there no one's gonna move there no come on be cool man yeah people move they're like some people live there already and then some people buy houses there like for vacations and shit or they want to escape the law and i love it man i fuck dude montana you can hawaii can keep it really mexico can suck it really it's fucking montana dude really oh and idaho oh dude you get on one of those uh really my i love i love cordelaine but as far as

07:34like taking my family on vacation yeah like a dude ranch we're riding horses my son's doing archery and shit i mean bison every morning wow it's great we went on a white water uh rafting trip in uh montana it was fucking fun it's the best yeah like you're on this rap and it's like wild shit man you you get into some wild waters you gotta hang on you're getting sprayed and you're you're bouncing off these fucking rocks with these inner tubes your kids are with you so you think about that i did the same thing with my kids yeah everybody's so stressed wearing vests and everything like that but i'm worried about bears more than anything i worry about bears my thing was there's a ton of bears grizzly bears right yeah yeah up there but the thing was for us they would come around and because you ever know it's not like a hotel you're known little cabin right it's it's in the middle of

08:19nowhere nowhere dude they knocked on the door like he just wanted to let you know there's a giant male moose on the property okay so just stay inside but if you are going to go out just want you aware i'm like the fuck male moose dude i you hunt and shit so maybe we've seen i've never seen one in person yeah they're jurassic so i called i said hey this might be a weird request my kids they're dying to see it can we will you will someone pick us up and try and find this thing like yeah sure they pick us up so it's me and my two boys and my girl and my father-in-law and we're going around and then the lights hit this fucking thing dude it's 10 foot tall from the fucking hoof to the horn yeah it was nuts man they're so big that's a fucking moose yeah like yeah daddy they're so big they're so big and they're one of the rare deer species that will fuck you up that's what the guy was like oh

09:12they're so aggressive he's like we wouldn't warn you if this was an issue like it depending like on mating season or whatever whatever else is going on the property like obviously we can't control if they fucking stumble on the property but if it's you know may depend on what's going on they can be uber aggressive aggressive yeah it could be a problem it's very rare that elk are aggressive but moose are very aggressive like all the time i guess it's just like the harsh climate that they live in i mean they live almost wherever moose are i think grizzly bears are well that's not true because there's moose in utah there's no grizzly bears in utah there's moose in new hampshire no no bears up there but there's bears in utah though right black bears there's black bears yeah black black colorado there's black well there's there might be grizzly bears in colorado yeah they've they've they've

10:00spotted unsubstantiated but my friend adam greentree spotted one got it on video it was in the san juan mountains and there's been more than one sighting in the san juan mountains grizzly of grizzly yeah which makes sense because they do travel you know they travel and they find new territory and someone just died some dude uh was out on his own hiking and they couldn't find them and then they they discovered it was definitely because of a grizzly oh i'm gonna be a worse worse way to go so you've seen the reverend and when he gets you know ass first dude go for my face man don't eat me ass first they just start eating you they don't like kill you first that's the thing about a big bear like that they just hold you down start chewing chunks out of nose at least a cat kills you yeah right away yeah they just get your neck and they want to be able to they're efficient

10:45killers bears just start eating brutal man fucking brutal what are you gonna do not much so you're only on season two though of yellowstone yeah i'm i'm jealous dude i just because then you get done with that you got season three four which is lit as fuck yeah and then there's 1883 the prequel the pre pre prequel right same writer taylor sheridan who's the best yeah he's the fucking man puts himself way too much into the episodes whatever you guys who was he's the main like horse guy he's the one selling the horses oh really yeah he's always on the horse yeah oh interesting and he's like sometimes wrote it too yeah my only issue with that is sometimes it's two balls deep in the horse which if you're like into that stuff i bet people like oh this is authentic but if you're not it's like all right dude the horse stopping like in the fucking sand and shit you know and he's just

11:37so into it but then that that ranch was it nuts super nuts was that uh six six six six ranch that's a that's real like you'll see as a season they start don't tell me well i'm just saying that six six six ranch i don't know what that ranch is you don't need to but i'm saying you already told me but it's a real rant now i'm gonna find out about it no no i'm just saying it's gonna make it even better for you because that's a legit fucking ranch people who tell you spoilers always tell you that oh it's not gonna ruin it at all have you seen the new speaking spoilers seen the new batman yes i saw that it's great i liked it i liked it a lot besides i mean the dark knight's the best of all time but to me that i was halfway through i looked at my girl because you know we have kids can't go to the movies i looked at my girl i go i paused hold up is this not the best

12:18fucking batman you've seen it's a great batman it's so good i thought it was the best one but it's up there i'm i say that and then i need to go like watch the other ones again you know like with fresh eyes like sometimes when something's good you're watching it yeah oh this is pretty good might get on the hype train the costumes are a little whack you think see i thought it was more realistic like yeah it wasn't realistic like cat least cat woman like she owned cats yeah she wasn't gonna be able to die nine times she barely covered her face yeah she was too hot and we didn't want to like cover any of her face just like a little tiny thing across her nose yeah but then also the most of her face the riddler the riddler was scary shit with the glasses yeah really see i like the riddler to me was so creepy because you know it's he's like you know he he like relate to all the

13:02incels and like this mob and like you know bring him to the fucking stadium and shoot everybody it's like yeah that could definitely the problem with all those movies is you compare them all against the joker and the joker movie was so fucking good and so creepy like and and you know the dark knight you're saying with uh yeah heath ledger well no the the recent one with uh walking phoenix yeah that joker is so good yeah but it's so creepy and such a good movie todd phillips just fucking nailed that movie and so and walking phoenix is crazy as fuck he's so good in that he's so good he must be insane he must he must be like an absolute insane person there's no way he could be that good playing the same person he's just so good dude it's so good but the point is like though that movie's so goddamn good and the the bad you know the character so believable and they build it up so well

13:59like it's hard to appreciate some of the like you don't know the riddler's background just all sudden he's a bad guy but if we knew as much about the joker like much about the riddler as we do the joker and then they had that in a batman movie like if they have a new batman movie with joaquin phoenix as the joker oh that's gonna be insane but did you see the new joker like they they so they flashed him just at the very end spoiler they splashed they they literally just flashed him right at the end yeah but it's kind of blurry but on hbo max there's a deleted scene oh and it's him with like the joke for like six minutes and dude fuck it's good oh really it's good a deleted scene with just him and the joker yes oh it's very like uh silence of the lambs remember where they use hannibal to like hannibal lecter to catch the other fucking serial killers batman goes to him to give

14:54the riddler files like i know you get off on this shit maybe you can help me out and who is the joke who plays the joker i don't know but it's good man i like how most of the people were like people that you don't know their name yeah you know other than robert pattinson most of the people were people you don't know like you don't know the penguin's name but he's calling farrell that was calling farrell yeah how nuts is that jesus christ really that nuts couldn't tell you know what i actually knew that i forgot it that's how good he is right oh my god the makeup's incredible nuts dude think about the batmobile batmobile's pretty dope that's uh that you know what that's so i saw the batmobile i'm like well look at that nuts that's incredible man and he wasn't all weird they do with him yeah dude that that

15:38car scene with him and that that batmobile if you look up the batmobile that's actually the chassis of an old school dodge challenger yeah i heard about that yeah that thing's legit yeah old school dodge challenger and then they did a bunch of like off-road shit buy one dude fucking get one seems like it's a wide thing to park difficult to find it's by austin you'll be fine la i'd be fucked here you're good dude maybe you're good i don't need that in my life no it seems like a lot it'd be fun yeah i got enough cars you wouldn't feel like an asshole in that would you wouldn't you think no it's so loud yeah i feel like an asshole in my chevelle do you in the chevelle it's so loud it's but it's it you know the world's turning to fucking teslas man and electric cars yeah but not totally like this is why it's fun right now to have like a muscle car it's because it's like you

16:30know that this is like the it's like going out when you're 36 and you're still single it's like someone made one oh someone made one no but this one's actually a chassis off a fucking like 68 challenger i think yeah that one looks more like christian bale's batman like the tumbler like that like the tumbler thing or whatever yeah that was dope that was the christian bale one the one with two wheels in the front but the one that uh robert pattinson has is much more like realistic that's right there it's right above right above go above above right there in the toy no it's a toy go next to it go next to it go next to it no second one watch my finger right there that click on that that's that's a toy but that's what it is that's what it looks like that's off old school chassis of a dodge challenger or maybe a dodge charger either way it looks like a

17:27charger yeah it's so dumb i think it's a charger but it's um it was cool like the whole movie was dark and mysterious and shadowy and it was fun emo yeah a little emo a little emo yeah but it was it worked it worked it worked i love a good superhero movie i'm corny you like like avengers and shit like you like aquaman i like it when they bring in the hulk yeah i like the hulk i'll get that i didn't watch aquaman because i'm not i'm not watching any movie with amber heard in it i'll tell you what i am watching is the trial i do it's the best reality show of all time i think i need to spark a join up before we're going to talk about the trial do it bro because i can't get enough of it it's literally it's amazing it's fantastic it's the best thing on tv at first i was upset because you know i'll watch the news and they interrupted ukraine getting bombed in the middle of a war with russia it's like

18:18breaking news johnny depp amber heard i'm like oh god what are we doing here i'm like let's see what's happening i was like oh hell yes it's exciting me up dude it's it's it's a cautionary tale for people that were thinking that it's worth it to date a crazy girl because she's great in bed no this is my thing though how great is she in bed that she can shit in your bed she can rip your fucking index finger off and you she must she must be a real tomcat in this act dude i think he's probably a really nice guy and he had great moments with her and he keeps going back to those great moments and thinking they can get past all this craziness because johnny i don't know johnny well i've talked to him before but i know of his career and i know of his love of hunter thompson and he's close with uh uh stanhope yeah very close and that's how i know him that's how i've met him

19:14well i've talked to him i met him once personally in the comedy store but i talked to him on the phone for an extended period of time once when he was dealing with all this shit and i think he's a really good guy that's what i think i think he's he likes chaos though he likes doing cocaine he probably likes doing things he shouldn't do like he probably likes driving fast he's probably an animal in in some ways like he just loves like chaos and i think that's one of the things the reasons why he loved hunter thompson he loved a brilliant man who loved chaos and that's what hunter was hunter was just like brilliant writer who was a culture cultural commentator who also enjoyed getting like obliterated how long really how long are we talking well hunter killed himself in the early 2000s okay um after what was it like 2010 11 or something like that i forget what

20:07year killed himself okay but he johnny was friends with him yeah and johnny played him in the movie um uh you know fear and loathing in las vegas and uh he also yeah he also narrated the hunter thompson documentary which is um uh was it gonzo life and yeah that just five what's that that in 2005 mm-hmm in colorado yeah yeah he shot himself i mean he was hurting at the end he had hip replacements and he was constant pain and a life of doing drugs like hardcore drugs and uh alcohol obliterated his body so it was johnny's uh johnny depp's north star basically yeah that's his that's his hero in a lot of ways i mean johnny depp is i i'm i i don't know the exact details but he has a significant amount of hunter thompson memorabilia like he bought a significant amount yeah when the wife when hunter's wife was going to get rid of some stuff johnny stepped in and got it all johnny paid johnny paid

21:11for hunter's funeral oh wow it was millions of dollars he built a cannon to shoot hunter's ashes into the sky and like you know that that he has this um this uh logo that's uh i don't know if you've seen that hunter thompson for sheriff poster that i have out there no he has a logo that's a fist with two thumbs like a mutant fist that has a mescaline tab in the center of it and that's his logo jesus and so he made a giant cannon out of this logo and here play this because this is hunter talking about it it's all described they'll do it from the beginning because he's explaining to the the the mortuary how he wants this done it's hilarious so he's discussing his future demise yeah god this is dark yeah and so that is different yeah so he just decided that he was going to do this and johnny depp actually wound up doing it at his at his funeral well i mean clearly he's going

22:18to blow his head off though i mean yeah so this is him to do this is a this is a young hunter planning this out god that is dark yeah and so when he got old and you know became friends with johnny i mean johnny's got all the fucking cash in the world so he decided to just do it so he spent millions of dollars building this fucking cannon and shooting hunter's ashes into the sky that jack sparrow mother i think i fucked him up too that that's the that's the the rocket jesus christ this is crazy that he actually went so dark i mean music's all fun johnny deb is hilarious that he fact just the fact that he did that that he carried through i agree he's a legend spent millions on it i'm a fan man but also think how long johnny's been famous too so he's gonna be wired a little different you know what i'm saying yeah it's not good it's like the way i've described it is like getting famous when

23:13you're really young and trying to be a fully grown adult is like making cement but you don't use all the material and it doesn't cure right you don't you don't grow up in a realistic world no like nothing's real yeah it's beyond and that's ralph stedman the guy who's drawing it who did all the hunter s thompson artwork he's brilliant artist and so he helped hunter design it i don't know if he was but look at this this is the fucking canon i'm on team depp for life you hear me yeah me too team depp yeah man i mean i wish he wouldn't wear uh eyeliner but yeah team a little too many scarves right right you give a fuck here's my thing i don't give a fuck anymore yeah i don't he can do no wrong in my book i'm a johnny depp fan if i was younger i probably would have criticized him for it now i'm like yeah look at that there it is

24:02this is super dark it's a wild move man the guy shoots his fucking ashes into the sky out of a goddamn cannon it's a tough following fist it's a tough follow yeah how are you gonna die and all these people go to his fucking funeral bill murray who also played him in where the buffalo roam which is another fun hunter thompson movie but the guy was a writer yeah and two different big time movie stars played him in movies christ johnny depp and fucking and yeah bill murray bill murray that's that's what a bad motherfucker hunter thompson bill murray has some anger issues huh i don't know allegedly maybe someone was a cunt on the set i agree maybe they deserved it i like to hear both sides of the story yeah there's people watching it from a distance yeah my funeral will not be like that yeah don't waste that money on me man i'm out yeah i want to be buried without formaldehyde i want to

24:50become a part of nature i don't want to be fucking filled up with some toxic shit that doesn't let you rot no but you want to be buried like just throw me in the ground no box no box yeah yeah keep it organic man just dig a deep asshole and chuck me in there no just just like i guess get like a what do you have a hennessy just get one of those big hennessy trucks and then have like uh your fucking boys your meaty boys your security just when i'm dead just throw my body out fucking laurel canyon and then just wherever it falls just let me go dude and then when you drive by just fucking salute that that's the you know you ever see the tibetan sky funeral no that's the darkest no i don't watch funerals tibetans well tibetan sky funerals is not really a funeral what is feeding you to vultures hard bath they take they take your clothes off and they chop you up with like machetes and

25:42hatchets and shit they chop you up into chunks and they leave you out there so like you would have to chop up callen in chunks be so easy leave them not just pull him he's so old i just pull him like beef jerky just like you take chunks and leave it out there and there's there's all these there's video and photos of it and it's uh the idea is that you know you're dead and this is a way to incorporate you into the universe into nature it's natural to have you i mean i don't know if that's what their ideas maybe there's like some religious aspect those vultures are ready to go the vultures know about the vultures know of course because this is how they get rid of bodies vultures are bitches though dude give me something better like test me with the alligators or some shit something like gnarly man lions fucking hate alligators i don't want an alligator to eat me i'd rather have a

26:35bird a stupid vulture at least they can fly they would they operate in 3d space but also dude they're like swimming in the ocean but it's the sky and they can breathe in it but dude also like that can only happen with small tibetan people like nobody's carrying my big ass across the mountains to feed me to the vultures just get more people to do it but isn't it interesting that nothing smart can fly is that true crows are not crows are smart they're very smart yeah but like humans and dolphins are considered like well we don't know though so the thing about crows is we always like to pretend that we know exactly how smart something is based entirely on what it can do yeah like and crows can do some really complicated tasks they can figure out how to solve puzzles like but the thing is they might be even smarter than that yeah they might be like devious bait shit in to for to feed you know

27:31they well they definitely smart with shit they they talk cats into fighting each other you ever see those videos yeah they're cool man but i mean i wonder like if they have a language they probably have some kind of a language they can understand because they say dolphins and whales do too right they definitely language and shit complex yeah we don't even understand how to decipher it here uh crows are self-aware and know what they know just like humans see that's what i'm saying almost no other species has that kind of higher intelligence wow and they're fucking big too look at what it says here they are they get pretty big and what now feels like an annual update crows are even more surprisingly smart than we thought but do we have but do they have true consciousness new research shows that crows and other corvids know what they know and can ponder the content of their own minds

28:22according to stat this is considered a cornerstone of self-awareness and shared by just a handful of animals animal species besides humans wow they got a bad rap too because like in all the movies they're like the evil that vilified right because they're all black well it's also it's like they look evil they they were they like the crow nose it was always like there's magic attached to and witchcraft crows dude when i'm on my bike you know back there in the fucking santa monica mountains there's some big ass crows man yeah big fucking crows well that's how you find dead things find them hovering crows and rattlesnakes man yeah fight you find birds but for sure if there's enough vultures you'd find vultures but the vulture thing is a wild way to ensure that your the body's going to be consumed but the then the skeleton's still there right so they smash it up i don't know what happens to the

29:17skeleton are dude see if you can uh get some photos of it of a tibetan sky funeral because i remember this is one of those things that i first found out about in the early days of the internet you know like in the early days the internet where you like you would just get sent things and it would change the way you looked at stuff like what like first thing i got was the daniel pearl oh that was awful i ruined my fucking week man that was awful that was an awful one yeah they caught those guys they call them the beat what the isis beatles some shit those guys are is that the same guy yeah that was the guy the one guy was an english accent he's fucked i didn't know that that was the same guy yep um so these uh these guys they it says don't take pictures why wouldn't you take pictures that's interesting what do you think they're there dude some random americans but i mean wouldn't you want

30:04this to be documented just to show because like what is wrong with making a photograph of something that's kind of important in its how crazy it is in comparison to normal funerals like this is weird they're the people are all standing there and they're they're what are they doing they're shooing away the vulture with those rags what are they doing yeah not yet boys is that what they're saying in this case in this video this is on national geographic there's uh there's tourists that are coming to watch this damn someone flew out there for this maybe they don't want them to do that i don't know if you were in town though like if you were in town you wouldn't go see that like if you just happened to be like you're doing a show and in tibet hey man tomorrow at one dude hey you know louis was supposed to be doing a show in ukraine i talked to him about it that's wild dude this is

30:54how wild of a boy he is because he was at the shop and friends at the improv and he did a guest spot there and he was in the green room first of all i can't remember the last time when there's a comic on stage and all the comics in the green room walked out and watched somebody's set i've seen at the at the store when you're on or burr you know joey diaz since then it's been years usually you just bullshit with your buddies you know in the green room and then when louis was on literally everyone was on the staircase at the improv and he just absolutely annihilated and not and then also i figured with you know what he went through kind of changes game up no man not at all what not at all dude and then maybe even better because now he's doing it like he's young he feels free again maybe he's like i got nothing else to lose fuck it yeah he comes back to the green room he gets on his

31:50notepad and he's writing what worked what didn't and then did the late show and made adjustments so cool to see so fucking cool to see but between the shows we were talking and uh he's like yeah weird you know he was like the the media's reporting i'm still doing shows he's like i was down to do it even though they told me what was going on he was like i was on a plane dude headed to ukraine and then i guess it got worse and he was and even then they told me hey the fans are outside man they're here and he's like even during this they're getting bombed like they're out here man dude then louie goes i'm still coming but then the plane he said was was like halfway and then turned around he's like but you know they told me they're there he was like i'm still gonna do it i was like you're such a savage dude sean penn was over there filming a documentary he was over there for quite

32:37a while that's weird though yeah is it is it you know like you want a good documentary or not you gotta have a little ego yeah do you want a good documentary or not i mean first of all who knows how to make movies better than sean penn probably nobody's made some well amazing movies yeah and the guy's got balls he has balls he went down to mexico well yeah he went down to mexico and he's also the reason el chapo kind of got busted right kind of like el chapo it's kind of the ladies fault but also first the rolling stones and you know get involved this and also el chapo what the fuck rolling stone magazine yes yeah um yeah not the band but the fact that he had the balls to go down and meet el chapo respect respect look the guy's off kilt right i'm a fan don't get twisted he's tilted yeah he's he's definitely like yeah he's a wacky dude yeah but he's the kind of guy that's

33:34willing to go to fucking ukraine in the middle of a war sean penn's meeting with el chapo was nearly his demise oh nearly sean penn's demise he got a lot of shit for that you know what way with this well you met with the biggest fucking cartel leader in the world right but he met with them to do an article like isn't that no he met with him because el chapo wanted uh sean penn to do the movie on him no that's why they met that's why they met yeah oh well that doesn't make any sense see if that's real jimmy they would have to do him the way they did the penguin there's no way he's gonna really look like el chapo they'd have to give him makeup i think he's gonna direct it oh direct it making a penn was non-committal about making a movie with or about guzman he took the trip to mexico solely to interview the king for rolling stone magazine that's what i thought see see he just hadn't shared

34:23the detail yet with guzman a man known for not enjoying surprises okay so he went there to film to do an interview but he hadn't told guzman that he was going to do an interview with him hold on read this this this is where he says hey this way fucked up joe look at this quote this is hilarious today i believe more in el chapo than i do the governments that hide the truce from me where where does it say that right here oh no oh that wasn't don't castillo wrote that on twitter oh okay okay thank god imagine sean penn with that deep nuts but listen that guy's got my respect he's got balls of steel he went to ukraine in the middle of the war i don't care if he's a gigantic movie star i don't care if he's you know he's a wacky hollywood elitist the guy went to take some balls i agree balls like steel and then on top of that meeting el chapo more balls the guy's

35:20got balls you got to give it to him yeah the el chapo thing though balls but also like yeah i guess it's scary as shit the guy murders it's all so many people the el chapo thing's all balls you're going to a mexican drug kingpin's house but not not just any drug kingpin the drug kingpin yeah the most famous savage savage being his you know el chapo because he's tiny del castillo i believe is the woman in this uh scenario she's the soap actor soap opera actress who had a relationship with el chapo they said yeah el chapo was a fan of her performance yeah so when she said that that makes sense dude i was at a my girl you know she used to work for telemundo or television one of the things and uh i was at an award show she's she's supposed to get this award and that girl was there and this was right around all that was going on and i saw her i was like i'm gonna pick with her and say jealous

36:15el chapo and my girl goes do not do that i was like that would be funny she's like no it's not funny that shit is i'm telling you it would not go over well yeah all that would take is one dude who wants to win a point yeah yeah they play by different rules and it's right there you can drive there from san diego far not far at all and it's uh essentially run by drug lords but also because you know you you cut the head off the snake there with el chapo now it's just mayhem dude i don't know enough about um the politics of the cartels oh i do comment on that because they they fight a lot right oh i do do you yeah because me my girl and the kids were just in mexico you know i stress out about it yeah let's go to san diego man right like if something happens at least i can call some people like mexico we're fucked my anxiety when we were there dude was i couldn't sleep yeah i couldn't

37:07sleep couldn't sleep yeah and then and then the last night we're there we go to dinner and i haven't seen this the whole time we go to dinner and we're walking back and uh one of the guys who works there greets us he goes i'll walk you back to your room like oh that's nice but i see behind me there's a dude in all camouflage carrying an ak-47 and i keep i'm like what the fuck is going on i have my i'm holding my son my boston he's two i'm so i'm home like this i'm like i'm putting him down just in case something pops off because i'm like why the fuck is this guy falling so my girl's up up above uh in front of me so i don't say anything because i don't want her to be stressed out so we get back to our little place and we go in there and then uh i didn't say anything because i didn't want to alert the family and the next morning i go hey when the homeboy comes back in here

37:50because he only spoke spanish um i go ask him why that guy with the ak-47 was following us last night she goes what and i didn't want to tell you but there was a guy following us back to the room so she talks to him because he's following us and as we get close to our little villa he just disappears into the bushes literally just walks on a a different path and she asked him he goes oh there's a a high profile celebrity on the property and when he comes here he hires his own security holy shit and i was like what that guy that dude's that scared holy what does he know that i don't know man yeah jesus the micro god mad because i was like you know they're kidnapping people she's like who the fuck's gonna kidnap your big ass i was you never know man you never know isn't that funny she's talking shit about kidnappings kidnappings are real dude me no they're real like for sure real they really do

38:41kill the americans they're really good though uh about the tourist and resort towns for the most part they're not right now though joe no like in cancun and uh where's the main place people go that fucking acapulco no acapulco some shit no that shit where you know where people go and they do weird shit tulum tulum tulum two people just died there where they can do real yeah they do drugs yeah people got caught up in a crossfire right do you hear why because uh again it's you know they're battling for that territory and when american tourist comes they want drugs so it becomes a big drug hub well the cartel provide the drugs so i guess they went to the main tulum like hotel restaurant and shook down the owner was like yo dude cool we're gonna take this much of a percentage and we're gonna run this area he's like nah get the fuck out of it like all right cool say less dude and then they come

39:28back and there's you know it's the nice place of tulum cartel members like fucking margaritas and taquitos or the fuck so they're chilling with the regular tourist another gang sees them they just open fire and then two americans die jesus christ yeah so you know i think but for the most part and i i did talk about this and we got emails where people like dude you're more likely to get shot in la detroit and chicago than you are mexico like mexico is way more safer i get that but i know how to navigate chicago detroit and la right i don't know how to now yeah sort of you sort of sort of i mean i'm not jordan peterson but you know i'm not great i'm not a black i always wonder when i watch you how often you have one of them little tobacco things in your mouth every time right now you got one oh yeah

40:11because it always looks like you have like dental work yeah yeah you just reminded me give me one of them things yeah you got it brother is it a real problem these things uh i love them rogue shout out to rogue nicotine dude do you know anybody with mouth rot no you're not gonna get cancer from these that what are you a doctor the what kind of statement is that i mean you know they're a sticker right here they are good yeah yeah this one's berry this new flavor berry i love it no dude you won't find a more intense flavor and i listen i don't you want one jaymy sure yeah come on dog get you some dude and i don't know it's because i got covet i'm just getting older but like i like intense shit like coffee yeah you had covet you can't smell anything i can't taste anything you need to be poisoned dude spicy stuff it can't get spicy enough for me oh i love spicy yeah i love this is not bad

41:03this is honestly no bullshit all jokes no these are not bad yeah rogues that you get like a buzz like a cigarette buzz yeah because you know how like some comics will smoke cigarettes before they go on stage this i i do you know i'm not gonna smoke i i physically can't smoke a cigarette and you think that is uh better for you maybe yeah 100 100 everybody thinks those vapes are better for you who's everybody david lucas well first of all david lucas is on tour with me i call him the i call him vape daddy at all times he has six vapes on him it's yeah he has i'll take a hit of it but he has literally like yeah he's got extras he just always has vapes on one a fresh one out for me to try yesterday and i took it and i was like is this actually better than smoking no it's worse it's worse for you is it worse yeah it's more condensed like concentrated nicotine i'm not sure no i am joe

41:50i'm telling you look that shit up jamie i'm telling you it's way worse for you than than smoking cigarettes that's what they say i do know of a young man who got pneumonia who vaped every day and he wound up dying oh wow i do know of that it was a young guy and he was a chronic vapor i mean all day every day and he had one of those box ones you know those thick ones you know lunch almost like a small vhs tape and they're blowing just giant clouds out of this thing all the time they smell nice too but their problem is they market to kids so there's like a fruit loop one there's like a fruity pebbles one they're fucking tasty um how good is david lucas though a comedy he's hilarious he's he's one of the best guys ever roasting like back and forth like with tony hinchcliffe he lit tony up last night in the green room with his coat so he looked like a gay puffer fish

42:40he goes i bet you blow up if i touch your ass he's like off the cuff comments on kill tony are some of the best i've ever heard when we're on the road and there's a heckler he again he's the guy will come out of the green room like yes oh heckle him do it see what happens fucking heckle him you know because chappelle's not on the road with me anymore man chappelle chappelle lacy chappelle lacy yeah sorry chappelle lacy who we both love yeah i love him yeah he also left the firing kid what's he doing he just focused on his own show which is on thick boy network the the chappelle chappelle's world thick boy network yeah yeah yeah i have my own like alley version of what you have here but it's all my shit yeah all my staff everything but um yeah it's great man but chappelle he's so funny because when he first come on the road with me i told him i said hey the goal here

43:29is you know you get so popular you're headlining your own shit that's how this should work yeah i don't want you just be my feature right and probably about i don't know six months ago seven months ago he's all nervous you know chappelle he's like the nicest fucking guy in the world and he goes hey man i can't do that that date in uh tacoma with you i'm like well the fuck yeah what do you got a fucking you know he plays in a band or some shit right yeah a band he's like no no i you know i'm starting to get headline gigs i'm like dude this is great like you're doing your own thing dude this is this how this should work so chappelle's doing his own thing man headlining crushing it he's gonna focus on his own podcast and now you know hopefully david luke's the next guy you know and david has it man he's a beast i can't too much for you daddy too much did you give up too you took that dude

44:11some bitches bro maybe it's the covet maybe your sense of taste is fucked no dude it's enhanced dude and i've been carnivore it's a lot i've been car i know you gave up on carnivore your boy's been carnivore for what since fucking december now i didn't give up on it i just added fruit and occasionally i cheat like occasionally i have a pizza yeah occasionally i'll have like uh some bread but not much the vast majority of my diet is just meat and fruit we're the same i don't i don't do fruit it's literally just meat and then i'll cheat like i took my kid to the movies we saw bad guys and you know whatever there's popcorn something i'll share with him yeah i'll be the weird dad right and then i do that show food truck diaries so you can't be on a diet on that right show tacos yeah or fucking barbecue so i'll cheat on that when the fighters are on but other than

45:01that i'm i'd say 98 of the time carnivore unless i cheat on the show for me the big change adding fruit was workouts my workouts are better i eat fruit in the morning before i work out and i was doing a lot of fasted workouts before and fasted workouts are fine but i really do think i get like a little extra juice i bet from the sugar i have some yeah if i have some fruit so that's all i ever eat in the morning is fruit the best i've seen you look i would say thank you and also jamie too man i know i was talking shit before i came in here living a good life out here you boys are crushing this is this is what freedom looks like yeah yeah i know dude but it's so it's so weird with comics in la and then the comics here it's not a la verse they make they're making it i don't why a lot of these la people are

45:50mad we left i mean dude it's the la scene's back and popping dude it's like you know sure it's great it's great people get fomo man everybody gets fomo they get fear of missing out it's normal when someone leaves and goes and looks like they're having too much fun it's always fuck that guy yeah i guess because of instagram like social media because you know i don't you know i don't see instagram or social media but i assume you post cool shit so people are like i don't even hardly post yeah i don't know i mean not about that i mean occasionally i post stuff about our shows once you're having once your club opens up though talk about fomo but it's gonna be a good thing it's gonna be a good thing it's a two-hour flight from la what are you guys crying about it's a good thing for comedy because we're just trying to help comedians get out there we're trying to give people a great place

46:34to perform where they're supported and they're taken care of and make them feel comfortable like you could have fun there and it's an art form man it's an art form that doesn't get the respect of other art forms it doesn't get the respect that music gets or that literature gets you don't think so now no it doesn't i think some of you guys do the process doesn't get any respect the process of developing as a musician like if you're classically trained right you can go to schools you can go to juilliard you can learn music you learn how to read beethoven you learn how to compose you learn how to you know play ancient songs you don't learn shit as a comedian you figure it out all in yourself it's all on you and you if you don't have good comedian friends it's hard to know what the fuck's the right thing to do or the wrong thing to do without like these interviews with george carlin

47:27when we looked into his writing process or you know without i would love to imagine there was a three-hour conversation with richard prior about how he does stand up that would be good but the game's changed now like it hasn't changed it has a little bit joe because you know you talk about a three-hour process of uh richard prior and how he got to where he's at and you look at the game now what about a three-hour fucking conversation with you or bill burr yeah that would be great or kevin hart but the thing is you can have that and we've if you took all the times i've ever talked about standing up on this podcast you would have more than three hours the point is like richard prior was doing it when no one knew how to do it uh-huh and the he's like one of the most revered artists of all time but his actual process of how he created that is kind of unknown i mean we know that he worked

48:17with paul mooney we know that he like he had writers and other comics he bounced stuff off and he did a lot of workout sets and he would have these ideas he'd flesh them out and work them out on stage we know about all that but to hear him talk about it would have been amazing but don't you think it's interesting too like you know if you talk about a comics process like some comics like to write it all out and some comics are just chaos where nobody's gonna relate to it but i think that's why there's not that kind of blueprint for it for sure and that's the same like same thing with you know i don't think ufc fighters get the you know the the accolades that these other athletes do because there's no path you're not going to college to you know a scholarship at duke and go to the nba like you made it everybody makes it different ways you made it as a wrestler yeah so yeah or you came up

49:04the ultimate fighter dana white's contender series so they don't get the same accolades i think it's the similar with comedy it's like everybody's different but i think why you know i was so fortunate when i got in the game and i i was surrounded by like you and bert and tom and delia like all in theo and especially really you because you know people go brennan your work ethic i'm like dude work ethic you're just you know you're the you're the the north star you're the standard for work ethic you and bill bird you look at bill you look at you so i think it's like that's working man and you your blueprint i think is gonna um be easier for people to digest if that makes sense because you're not crazy right does that make sense no i know i know what you're saying yeah you you approach it more like a professional athlete yeah yeah and you have to you have to you have to

49:57approach it like a professional but sometimes a professional is just a nut like some professionals are like professionally like kinnison like you're never gonna get you would never get him to do it that way you never get joey diaz to approach everybody has their own way of doing it but the point is that there's there's a way to parse that out it's not that you would teach a blueprint of how to do it but there's a way to parse out all the ways if you looked at the way gilbert godfrey created stand-up you look at the way david tell create stand-up there's a way that we could at least get some lessons there and develop a study on it because what stand-up is is a kind of a form of mass hypnosis that most people love most people love to go to a comedy show and laugh hard if you've gone to a comedy show and

50:44you saw one of your favorite comedians and they had a great set you walked out of there like oh my god that was amazing like you just took a drug like you you see people piling out of theaters and they're just laughing and they're having so much fun you you gave them a drug for as long as you were on stage and that that in its final form like you know comedians sell out arenas and comedians have netflix specials that are huge but in terms of the the way people understand how that was created there's almost no support and it's hard for people in the beginning to even figure out how to get going isn't that part of that's great i don't mean no you're right kind of cool part of it's good yeah part of it's good but it would be better if once you got to a certain level of proficiency you were helped along and i

51:34think that's what we can do here in austin i think what i want to do with the mothership is have this place where you can work out and you can learn and you can be around and we can all like help each other because you're going to be around these killers you're going to be around guys like segura you're going to be around guys like hinchcliffe you're going to be around these fucking murderers that come in from out of town tim dylan and tim dylan's a murderer and you you around that you absorb all this shit derrick's out here too derrick's also one of my favorite people he was on the road with me for two years animal animal funny as fuck so he's the best but he's out here but you you and i and i think what you're doing austin's be great and it's gonna you know you build it they will come especially you but you did that in la brother you did that for me man you gave me a career you know that's

52:21why i learned how to do it i learned how to do it in la because it was like the store was the place where people were doorman or or you know parking lot attendants and waitresses and shit and they wanted to be comics and that's how they got their job there and they went all the way to being professionals and they were always with us like we've we've had relationships with people there from the time like ari and i were friends when he was a doorman yeah and now he's a pro duncan duncan was the guy used to answer the phone when you call and give in your dates david lucas was a door guy yeah but that's what i took from you like if there's anything and you know i'm super grateful and you know how you know i almost feel like my careers make a wish when they find out you know i don't have mental issues the out of here dude but um like the thing i learned from you it's like now with my

53:06platform not as big as yours but it's not bad i give back yeah right you're chappelle lacy you're following the blueprint little brows you know this white rapper who creates all the music for all my promos and he's so talented man that's awesome nutsos that's beautiful that's that's good you're helping yes good and there's my job there's something to that that is like it's very enriching for you too you know it's it doesn't just help those comics that you're giving a boost to it helps you like it that's the thing that people think about um philanthropy they think about like charity work or doing something good for someone or being kind and generous they think about it like wow you're giving so much but you get something out of it too you get a you feel great you're it's the universe wants to reward someone who tries to do better and tries to make people around them better and tries to

53:59get better because of those people around them that are better and tries to celebrate all the people that are better than that it's also the right thing to do it's especially if the people have the chops they just haven't been you know introduced to the fan base there's quite a few of those yes you know there's there's so many yeah that's the thing i'm learning there's so many and that's the and some of them would have quit before agree and because the internet they don't have to quit yeah the internet is opening up a path where these guys are going to get promoted where maybe they wouldn't fit in on a late night talk show agree maybe they wouldn't get cast in a sitcom or maybe netflix passed on economy central but for whatever reason they can find their niche and people are going to you know vibe with it you know that that's why i did and i'd like your thoughts on it it's like with my special

54:40the plan was to have my team shoot it and then sell it and that you know to all these major networks i'm not calling anybody out but i'd meet with everybody you name it i met with a man they made offers and i'd go okay what can you guys do they'd give me a list then i'd call my team and go hey how much is it to this can we do this and they give me all i'm like i feel like i could fucking do it man and for me it's like where i'm at my career i need the most eyeballs possible yes i don't you also it's not a paycheck it's not it's you know it's not about money in any facet i just need this out as many people that they can see and see how hard i work at this yeah you're gonna see a giant improvement in your set if people saw your first one to now the first one i would have probably tried to talk you out of it but i already talked you out of fighting yeah and i was like i can't talk about this too

55:25and yeah no but you could have but showtime but showtime was willing to do it and like they were gonna give you money i'm like what am i what the fuck am i gonna do but it but it i wouldn't i don't regret anything but at the time and you know and i think it's funny too if you know when i talk to fighters because of it it's my own perspective here even in comedy like dude there's no rush man right it's a fucking marathon not a sprint yeah like you're gonna get this stuff and say i just had this time you don't want it too early you don't want it too early and it's also like you know even on the road it's like you know they're pushing me into theaters now i'm like no no hold on i'll get there i'm good man i need the reps in clubs i like clubs clubs are great and and i think to me it shows that i'm i'm maturing as a a stand-up and it's just like give me time man

56:16don't don't force this we've been real fortunate to have vulcan in town so that we work out here all the time so we're always working out in clubs so even if i'm doing arenas i'm working out the material in clubs i think that's the best diet i think stand-up has to be kind of like crossfit you got to do like a small crowd sometimes you got to do like a you know a belly room type 90 seater crowd yeah and sometimes you got to do you know you don't have to ever do the big places the big places are wild but they're it's just like you know it's a different animal 14 000 people in a circle around you is fucking bananas you know that's it's great it's fun like we had a great fucking time in fort worth last week also financially it makes a lot of sense too if you can do that it makes you make a lot of money but yeah but the show is a different kind of thing like the roars of the

57:05laughs are insane when you crush in front of that many people it's wild timing's different too yeah you have to like completely pace yourself more because they can't hear there's so many people laughing and there's so many people in the room you're not doing crowd work like you know that you can't pick on a person in the front row right because the guy in the fucking occasionally some shit goes down yeah but in general when i was in boston some lady with blue hair was yelling at some guy to stop being racist like in the middle of my show i was like what is going on and you acknowledged it yeah i had to i was like i was closing i was like getting and i'm at the fucking boston garden it's a sold-out show it's my hometown yeah coming home i saw the fucking garden and the end of my set set's going great

57:45this lady is yelling fuck you fuck you and she's standing up and pointing at him i go what is going on people are great they were great and and she goes tell that guy to stop being racist and i said i go i'd i forget exactly how i phrased it but it was someone something sent of um i normally would just accept the fact that this guy had probably done something wrong if it wasn't for the color of your hair i think you might be susceptible to outrage i was like you might be a little bit more more complainy than most man like i don't know what happened yeah i'm like we're wrapping this up i'm bringing this thing home yeah you hear fucking burrs playing fenway that's amazing they just announced it this morning oh my god he'll saw that out yeah he's a hero in boston bro they they they put they put him on the broadcaster in the the red sox game oh my god really dude he just

58:35fucking goes in on derek jeter and canadians it's so fucking funny you could tell they didn't know what to do they're like uh well see he's a guy that can do that like remember when dennis miller did monday night football yes and got so much shit for it because he tried to do jokes yeah he had like a bunch of jokes written baby it wasn't organic it wasn't organic yeah like somebody talked to me about that and they were saying like uh is it hard to do comedy and commentate for the ufc i'm like is it hard to kiss your daughter on the cheek and then hang out with your buddies and high five no it's two different things completely different yeah and you're not trying to crack jokes right i mean you're a funny guy by nature so if something pops off people have all kinds of like layers to them there's people that are sweet to their grandmother and you know they're they're rough on

59:22a guy at work that's a dick either you're you're different no matter you know no matter what you're doing you know there's some hell's angels out there are great dads and then they gotta collect money dude break some legs that was the thing in goodfellas right that joe pesci yeah that's right with his mom yeah yeah yeah yeah his kid yeah that's right but the point is it's like i don't ever fucking try to be funny it's like i'm just just trying to talk about what's and not sound stupid and trying to put bring life to it yeah i'm just gonna do what i do and if you guys think it's funny cool but that i'm not i'm not trying to never come on epoxy i better be funny this time that's the thing man we used to do these radio shows and they would say before you go on stage or before you go on on air rather uh a producer came backstage i don't want to name the show but they're the good

60:07guys they came the producer comes backstage in l.a no and the producer's like okay so what topics are you going to cover so they can lead you into them i go what are you talking about what i go we're just going to talk and the producer goes what no you have to do your bits i go listen man i go listen man i'm not doing my bits there's nothing worse and you know he like like shakes his head and like looks at the sky and just walks out of the room like this fucking loser i'm like bitch i'm a professional dude i'm not fucking ryan seacrest talk we can't just talk yeah i'm in town you don't think we can have something interesting in fact about the fact that i'm in town for the ufc and a comedy show at the local comedy club you don't you don't think that we can find something to talk about i think i'll be all right man i talked for a living i'll navigate my way through it let's just talk

60:52you don't need to know funny thing about the zoo bob oh yeah oh yeah did you say chilies the thing about chilies yeah it's like come on that's what all those late night shows essentially did i don't know if they still do it that way because i haven't done one in forever but like if you did stand up on one of those shows like you showed them your set they went over it with a fine tooth comb they changed a lot of it they would cut out minutes clean yeah you have to do super clean yeah and then if you went to sit down next to like johnny carson like john i don't know how johnny carson did it but i know that like some of those late night talk show guys they would have very specific things they'd want to talk to you about you know like so uh i heard you started riding a bike in your neighborhood yeah yeah how's that going yeah funny you brought that up jay yeah i'm glad you brought that up man

61:37so you'd have to do this like corny bit that was back then though yeah but then also with johnny right if you crush it he'd call you over to the couch that was a big deal that was the deal now there's like there's no late show that does that now like that's gonna blow like guys careers just got blown the up from it there's nothing like that yeah you know you're the close thing johnny carson now yeah yeah yeah you know that but that's okay i like that job i like helping this guy's like dan soder or normand or shane gillis or like you know i do this podcast on a regular basis with uh shane gillis ari shaffir and mark norman yeah my favorite protect our parks yeah this is the most ridiculous podcast last time we did it shane drank 14 beers 14 no 15 15 it was 15 at the end 15 beers 15 fucking years of all those guys who the fuck drinks 15 of anything shane gillis does

62:29how about drinking 15 diet cokes that'd be insane he'd probably die i mean have you done that me and donald trump do that every day yeah but i mean in a row like he's got a stack of empties i'll drink 10 diet cokes a day norman is the lightweight he like dabbles he pretends he drinks and doesn't doesn't get too fucked up ari gets he goes in we get ari goes ari and i get the high i did norman doesn't even get high right no not really i don't think so no he doesn't so it's me and ari me and ari are baked and we're drunk shane's old school like shane was coming to la and he hit me up and you know he we're we're boys and we talk back and forth and then he goes uh he you know i don't think he knows that i have kids he's like dude you want to go to a bar like a sports bar and grab some beers like bitch it is it is wednesday at six o'clock dude my kids go to bed at seven he's like yeah so i'm

63:16like no i'm not going to a fucking sports bar man he goes to watch game six of the fucking yankees or whatever it was one just old school dude but he has started working out again you know because he was a football player he was jacked at one point in time he's a big athlete yeah and he just got sloppy yeah i think he played football in high school and then one i think he walked on to army or some shit like that right i don't know the yeah and then what and i think he got there and was like fuck this he's like this is what it is i'm out man yeah i don't know the full extent of his uh athletic he's hilarious but i do know that he's working out again so he's looking great like he's losing weight he's his muscles coming back maybe grab his arm the other day i was like really it's getting bigger dude it's jacked like because it's muscle memory yeah that's the thing about a guy who

63:57was big at one point was he that big was he jacked or i mean he was a athletic football player i don't have a photo of him that i beat off i'd like to see it though you know in his underwear yeah i'd love to see that shit because there's always guys that like wrestle or play football that aren't in good shape no yeah it's like where you like actually playing you know there's a fine line right right where was that oh i was doing uh chrysler's podcast last week yeah in chrysler i don't know what people just goes oh dude you like this guy i they oh you like dude he wrestled he wrestled i'm like oh shit what what were you talking oklahoma state were you on the national team we're talking money he goes oh no in high school looked at bernard went that doesn't count bert he goes why do i go i played basketball in high school man i mean you can't call me a basketball player like there's

64:42there's there's levels to this game well it's the thing when they bring you in and you have to talk to somebody that like has a casual understanding of the thing you know but and it's like okay we're talking about a different thing here yes i was on a podcast once and they had a guy that was like their security guy and their security guy was a fake karate guy and uh i kind of had heard that maybe some of those stuff that he had done was full of this is not a small show either yeah and so uh i'm on the show and we're this was like during the days when i first started commentating for the ufc and he starts talking about how the stuff they do is for the street do you know how much that makes my fucking blood boil it's triggering for me it makes me so angry when someone says this the stuff we do is for the street see i won't let that slide though i didn't

65:36let it slide no i no no no i'll be hold on hold on hold on go back you know i'll we'll talk it through like i was on your boy what patrick david bett patrick bett david yeah patrick bett david he has a great car collection by the way oh he's awesome after the fact he's great love that guy one of my favorite people i love that guy to death i did his show and he's brilliant he's yeah i think it was that miami super nice guy too the nicest i text you before i'm like hey he's cool and he's great the best but he does a show with two co-hosts and they kept saying yeah but people do it to me all the time whenever i'm doing press though this guy's an athlete this guy's and they kept saying athlete athlete and i went hold on hold on it's triggering for me hold on i think we're a little too loose with the term athlete like what what what's your definition of athlete i think ours are different

66:18and i'm not i'm not shaming anybody you're talking about elite athletes like high level college athletes where i was at so if you're gonna throw this term around right know who you're talking to it's like if you're in a room with jordan peterson or elon musk you keep going oh this guy's smart this guy's smart right right hold on your drug dealer smart smart street smart what are you talking about yeah what does that mean there's different levels to this game giant leaps yeah it'll trigger me because this guy's athlete you know but this guy had got them convinced that he was like a security expert and i knew he was a fucking idiot and when i heard that that we do this stuff for the streets i go hey man listen to me yeah i said the best stuff that you should learn is the stuff that works on trained killers this is one of the good things with the internet because brian had this friend who'd hang

67:01around him all the time and brian go i remember that guy and brian go uh dude he fought he fought fucking chuck congo he did and he goes he fought chuck congo also he wrestled at asu i'm like okay cool and i you know i didn't i was being cool about it and then we'd hang out he'd make references to it yeah i fought vanderlei silva in brazil on the beach and all the shit i'm like okay cool and then i go uh where can i find them it's easy to look up the internet's there all day if you did this he's like no this is underground shit man oh okay and i go but you wrestled at asu he goes yeah i did i go what years you tell me oh my my actually my head coach in uh at rain training center who's uh chael's main guy and all those i go uh he uh he was the captain of asu so i text him hey you ever heard of this guy

67:45he goes no and then i go dude he's never he was there the same years he was the captain of the team you wrestled for me he goes hold on dude i didn't i wasn't i didn't go to asu they would let me in the practice i'd go with the team i just went compete so i take my hey was there a guy that came in that you he goes excuse me you think we'd let an out no it's against ncaa rules because this guy's full of shit so i took brian and go brian let me talk to you real quick your friend full of shit it's very easy to prove and how did brian handle it oh he was like oh really i'm like yes dude i know dude brian is so bad at seeing that yeah there's been so many times when he and i have been friends i've been like hey man what is going on with that guy yeah what are you saying that guy he's like on coke he's out of his fucking mind he's full of shit like that's not your lawyer

68:34there was always like people around him that just had no business being around him but god he always like he looked he sees the best in everybody so he's like no dude this guy no he does this guy fought chuck congo on the beach in france i'm like he he didn't it's a disturbing thing to be that bad at spotting liars though the worst the worst but it comes from a good place i think yeah you know he doesn't mean to yeah that stuff's triggering for me on that on that patrick uh he does come from a good place yeah it does it's kind of endearing yeah that he's so nice to yeah idiots yeah yeah but it was way up with it it was way worse when he was younger oh it's still bad now he it's dude he brought some kid it's way worse that is it really yeah way worse oh god bless him because again i don't get mad at him

69:21anymore it's just sometimes you gotta accept people over there he brought one guy in the the thing he was like he played in the nba did he played in the nba uh i'm gonna bring him in it's like five minutes before we go live i'm like no hold on who's this you know i'm like you i'm like you i'm i'm between you if brian's here and you're here i'm in the middle okay you know i'm trying to get better okay you know and so uh he goes this guy he's giving me his background he goes he played in the ameas yeah i go brian it doesn't matter how's he a fit on the show dude it's a comedy you know we around dude right he's not all right he's just gonna sit in so he sits in and then i talk about you you playing in the nba no i'm playing there i was you never playing there he's like no i played overseas like minor league and i'm like god damn it oh brian but brian heard like so for him he

70:06he thinks the best to keep by asking the man no he just heard brought him on the tall black guy so he's like oh he's good i'll show you my value to the show yeah he's good my decision making so i'm gonna bring on a guy how was the guy was he good he didn't come up i wouldn't allow him on the show i don't know this guy you can't have a mic we we got a show to do i don't know this you can't come on oh brian dude and then when i used to tour with him he's not doing it now anymore when he used to tour with him you know we'd be in the front of the plane and people would walk by like a big swole black guy he'd go dude my god your body i'm like oh i'd be like oh no what are you what are you nfl players something like that and i go hey let me talk to you real quick that's so appalling because if they're not dude you know how racist that is well not only that it's

70:49like a man just wants to get on a plane a man doesn't want to be complimented on his physique over and over again by a guy who's like kind of acting like what is going on here trying to get to his seat on he's like wait what right the one time i'll give this to brian the one time is the saquon barkley who's like the biggest freak in the nfl and he's kind of shorter but his his fucking quads are like this so i see him right and he's his rookie year in the nfl for the giants he's rookie of the year and fucking almost won the heisman i i i track him i see him come on the play i'm like let's say come on barkley that's a fucking jack dude i'm like fuck brian's gonna say something he's walking my eyes hey bro my god those fucking quads and he got it right this time so it worked he goes what are you with some sort of running back let me guess and he's

71:32like yeah man and brian's like oh yeah and they're like hugging taking pictures and shit oh my god it finally paid off dude well it's you ran to saquon barkley if you throw a hundred darts but one of them hits the bullseye yeah isn't it worth it yep it worked for him so just i don't know if he's still doing it he would tell you about his fucking bob saget story no brian brian's going to play like some show and i think bob's going uh say i was florida or somewhere you know bob playing some fucking arena he's killing it and uh bob's bob's in first class i love this story bob's in first class and brian's walking by brian soon goes bob what's up my voice what's up man oh good to see you and he's talking and he goes uh where are you going brian goes oh my my seat's back there and then bob just leaks in and goes well i've won he goes i won he goes i'm in first class you're not i've won

72:25he just brian said i was talking he's well i've won okay see ya give it back brian's like okay well i've won yeah wasn't brian a comedian that's supposed to be funny yeah yeah i would have laughed brian bro brian said he's laughing because he just kept shouting it well i've won i've won you're back there so funny uh he was a good dude man his passing was a sad one that was a hard one to take curious i mean i'm not a conspiracy guy in any facet which also uh you know met alex jones last night nice guy alex jones is a very nice he's a really nice guy nice guy yeah he loved my bit on uh vaccines that's what he told me so you're doing something right if alex jones likes your vaccine bit but uh he uh he's a nice guy but again i'm not a big conspiracy guy but when you look in a bob sag it's death it is a little weird right well i mean he fell obviously he blacked out

73:21i mean um did you see that not know but here's the reality of not knowing about his health yeah you could we could both fall into speculation here about all kinds of things you don't know why people black out we don't know if people have a history of blacking out and i don't know if like this was the first time you know like sometimes people like legitimately have medical issues and you could jump to conclusions and not be aware of those yeah you might have been dealing with it in his family people have done that about close friends of mine or people that i knew oh it's horrible and it drives me crazy it's like come on man you don't you don't know the whole story i'm not even trying to open a can of worms so he he fell apparently it looks like he fell and blacked out and yeah and you know as well as i knew know that when like you've seen street fight videos where guys get ko'd and their

74:08heads bounce off i watch world start every morning it's so scary oj simpson first the more it's so scary but that the only weird thing is is the the doctor that the autopsy was saying again i'm not trying to start any shit here i'm just the article that i read this doctor goes the the weird thing is if you fall you usually will see a fracture in the back of the the skull because the the weird thing about this thing and he didn't draw any conclusions he just goes the or orbitals were fractured right the front was fract the frontal was fractured and the back and he goes and the only time you can do all that is if you were to fall out of a 30 foot story building he goes so or if somebody took a bat to you so he's like so just fall in the bathtub this doesn't make sense but who knows yeah but if you fell in the

74:56bathtub and you hit your face where your orbital is on the rim of a steel bathtub or a ceramic bathtub something ungiving and then fell backwards i'm sure i mean he might have fallen twice but also hey uh because if he fell and was like semi-conscious he still fell again and then fell and then blacked out again yeah i'm not trying to start anything but my thought is like i don't know what his health was like bob was in his 60s you know and he liked to party yeah in terms of like you like to have a few alcoholic beverages uh i don't know if he was still drinking at the time and he never had like a drinking problem but i'm saying he's not it's not like he was running marathons you know he's uh also shit happens like sometimes freak shit happens shit happens so for the family it's terrible that people keep carrying on with this stuff i'm just saying what that doctor said i thought that was

75:45weird but it's also like okay at the end of the day okay but also if there was some you know malarkey or you know kind of shady shit going on it was happening at the four seasons so they have video yeah so it's kind of i don't think they think that i don't i don't think any i don't i haven't really read any like legitimate because i think there's a thing with the cards like when you get into the door they know how many times you've done it and they know nobody entered the door after him yeah yeah so that yeah case solved again i would never disrespect no no i know you're not it's just a conversation he had he was a sweet man he was also a savage on stage yeah yeah just a really sweet guy always nice to me man super nice to me just nice to everybody man yeah was always like friendly and kind and genuinely wanted to like engage with you and connect with you and talk to you and everybody

76:33felt that way like you're hard-pressed to find people who uh don't like bob yeah i'd say a bad thing about him but you know for me i know you say you know he's he's nice to everybody you know for me especially coming to comedy not everyone was nice to me man yeah which i get i completely understand it's unfortunate you know like it doesn't bother me that's fine but it's like the guys that were and where i'm at now you know that that that goes so far with me man right now it's like hey man whatever you want to you hire you gotta fucking hide a dead body call your boy whatever you gotta do man you were nice to me when you had no reason to be there i'm in dude there's bad people and then there's people that you just might be annoyed by and you gotta learn to accept the people that you might be annoyed by the bad people the people that are like doing something bad to people taking something from

77:20stealing something sure you know robbing people fucking people over those are the people that you should be concerned about because they're not thinking about other people they're only thinking about themselves they're only they they're trying to victimize other people in order for them to gain their own success but the other people that annoy you you gotta look at like what are they doing that's so bad and why are you spending so much time concentrating on it and i get criticism and and one of the things about being a person like you or being a person like me who's public is you gotta accept the fact that people are going to talk about you it's what we signed up for it's what you signed up for it's just a part of the program but some people in their for their it's not in their own good interest to be

78:04spending so much time no just getting upset that this other person's doing comedy and they're doing comedy like they look at you like oh you're a ufc fighter oh he's doing comedy now it's almost like comedy is like some i know it's sacred to them because for every comic it's like when you're on stage and when it goes right it's like that's what you're working towards you're putting countless hours into that moment where you hit a punchline and everybody laughs and you know you're locked in and everybody's enjoying that moment it's all worth it if you're comedy is very black and white though too it's like you could be brad pitt and you got on that stage especially at the comedy store the laugh factory the improv you know those aren't my home that's not a home game for me and if you're getting it's very black and white you know it's not like does that make sense yeah it works or it

78:54doesn't work yes you're gonna you know sink or swim well that's one of the reasons why one of the reasons why i had carrot top on the podcast he was always a guy who was like a whipping boy and i was like why he's so nice he's so nice he's funny he's just doing his own show if you have fucking kids and you want to see like a family friendly funny show carrot top show is really good think how long he's been doing it forever something's working and like when you engage with him like when he was on the podcast he's a sweetheart on here man he's great he was weird when he got all juicy right yeah but i also enjoy that big he got jack he wanted to get jacked for a while yeah but he got a little crazy yeah but it's like the thing is is that guy was a whipping boy for zero reason for so long call him a hack and shit like that right well it was just that he was using props

79:43that's all but he was using him so well that he changed the genre like no one else is a prop comedian now that boy sells tickets but it was a thing where like when i was coming up in the 80s like in 88 when i started that was a category of comedians a prop comic yeah there was a guitar comic a prop comic sometimes people had puppets you know that all those are gone like he's you for as far i don't mean to interrupt you no it's just like as far as you know like puppets go it says it you don't really see it anymore like no no like you'd have to have some real balls to go up at the comic store improv or ice house and get out a puppet well you better be funny the great one was jeff dunham the great one jeff dunham is awesome i mean he's got a bunch of different characters and jeff dunham kills it on

80:30the road kills what kills it i think forbes top 10 yeah kills he just kills it give me a fucking puppet the great one is otto and george yes otto and george i worked with otto and george in the 90s really in new york city oh damn yeah we did shows in new jersey we did shows oh god we did a gang of shows we did fucking i did what they call uh prom shows with otto and george and otto uh and i would do these shows where you would have kids that were coming in on their prom so they're 17 year old kids and they pump them in there and they can't drink but they all bring in liquor sure they're all hammered yeah and uh they want you to tell the same jokes so that the kids leave because the kids they can't get the kids to leave so they keep pumping more kids in and then to get the kids to quit the show's over thank you ladies and gentlemen but they still sit there like they could sit there if they want

81:22so then they like do the same act so that they leave i'm like i'm not doing the same act what a nightmare i'm like i'm not bombing in front of the same kids over and over yeah i saw that joke boo there was a guy um i don't want to say his name i don't embarrass him but he was on stage and this kid was a big kid like a big football player looking kid went on stage took the mic from him and blew cigar smoke in his face savage and he didn't do a fucking thing about it i was watching i was like man that's a problem like you got to have security to stop that yeah like you can't let that happen and this was during the prom shows but that's how crazy prom shows were we would do like five six and a night but it was really lucrative like if you were like me and you were broke yeah yeah you would get you would get good money and you would get like five sets a night yeah stage time and as long as

82:11kids kept showing up they kept having shows so they wouldn't even tell you how many shows you had they would just call them prom shows and so i left when it was light out fuck light out yeah i left danger fields in new york city and the light was coming up jesus christ and i was like this is crazy it was like five in the morning i was like this is nuts yeah old school man yeah that was with otto otto uh he had some great bits man and the the dummy would say the horrible like give me give me something so you can see it 98. i need to lick some ass all right i need to lick some ass all right suck my presidential cock all right now he's doing built my teeth with my cock if you love your country all right drop my pants and lick some ass all right jfk got a lot of clues on all right all right we're gonna do the uh inauguration of john kennedy

83:11am i inaugurate am i saying it right run forest run you learn how to talk jerk off he's not even hiding his mouth he's just talking i did a bunch of shows with otto and one of the shows i did was that also at danger fields and some this is this kid in the front row he's like man i can see his lips moving yeah he's not hiding his lips you're missing everything you pay attention to the dummy it's a suspension of disbelief yeah but this kid was so dumb and he was sitting there go man i can see his lips moving you're missing it dumbass is this can i grab this water yeah it's water yeah yeah just grab it grab it and dump i think it's like a one giant chunk unfortunately just smash it on the table there you go do you want some yeah give me some of that thank you definitely kovac yeah he was i'm not scared yeah me neither he's not a uh you know he's not a guy

84:06that people talk about enough otto was brilliant and he was he was also the type of the type of comedy that he did was just so reckless i mean you don't see that at all it's a dying form man but his was amazing he had an amazing thing because the dummy would say the fucked up things and we go oh that's crazy how can you say that yeah i wonder if there's a comic that could do it today and the dummy just says some outlandish yeah and then like can they cancel you but it's the fucking i wrote it it's the fucking it's coming out of the dummy someone should have like blue hair and they should be like the progressive ultra liberal and then they should have a dummy that's their dad who's like an archie bunker who says some really funny fucked up shit that would be a brilliant act because you would be exonerated especially if you claim non-binary status before you started your career

84:54crush it you would kill it because you just get away you're a member of that protected class you got pink hair yeah you go up there with like some fucking peace shirt on or something like that and then you have a dummy and the dummy just says horrible horrible horrible shit yeah it's brilliant dude someone's gonna do that god i hope they why not please do it it's a dying art form dude the ventriloquist art form is kind of a dying art you know how much fucking money jeff dunham makes i know i told you forbes top 10 when i was at stand-up lives probably four years ago you know take sales were good and i'm walking to get uh food and it's the middle of the afternoon i look over it because it's right across from the where the suns play it's packed yeah i asked the manager who the the suns are i know the suns were playing the middle of the day goes oh no it's jeff dunham he has a

85:42two o'clock four o'clock and a eight o'clock show what excuse me is it 2 p.m it was like two it was like two five and eight holy shit like hold on hold on he sold out suns arena three times three times the same day he goes yeah it's three more tomorrow oh he goes all families and kids wow like my dad wouldn't come to my comedy go to jeff dunham yeah but yeah there's guys like that that it completely escaped mainstream media but they're just killing it crush it that's wild is that are those real numbers that's insane and i was like who the fuck is over there if that's true he's probably the number one act in the country he's up there he has to be i mean if he can sell out in phoenix six shows in an arena well those those comics that do that right like they're showing like i've heard of that like uh fluffy right like fluffy sold dodger stay amount twice now jesus christ twice i think

86:38he's for the netflix thing how many how many people are in that that's gotta be like 60 000. i don't know i know they were telling like not to do it there's some weird story i was talking enrique at the laugh actor about it they were telling like not to do it because it was outside and then he was like well let's see how it goes and i guess it sold out in like you know an hour okay you want to do another one he's like let's see how it goes and that bitch sold out fluffy's a beast dude look at that gabriel fluffy iglesias at second dodger stadium date after becoming first comedian to sell out historic venue holy good for him dude they have his uh picture up at the ice house and like 57 sold out shows in a room yeah it's like holy 56 000 okay a glacier show is we'll have a little over 45 000 people so

87:30he sold 90 000 seats well it says dave chappelle is doing four nights at the hollywood bowl which has a capacity of 17.5 he sold out those dates it puts 70 000 butts in the seats wow look at this hater but there are plenty tickets left for chappelle's show oh stop fucking hater dude how about maybe they're saying that because you could go out and get tickets nah sounds like some salty bitch well they were just comparing them against how good gabriel's doing is the person who wrote that article latino it might just be proud might be that might be a big gabriel fan doesn't tell you but also i mean i can't tell by the name what's the name tom tap two peas no no no that's a white guy for sure probably a white guy yeah big fluffy fan though probably there's a lot to say at the local barista spot yeah with this Americano but also but also you're not throwing shade at chappelle because chappelle

88:20still sold more well it doesn't matter it's like it's still crazy but it's both of them are fucking crushing it i'm just happy for gabriel he's a great guy happy for both of them yeah dude i uh you know when i met with all these networks they were talking about billboards so i called my team i was like hey how much is a billboard they told me here's the thing you don't know about billboards in la first of all netflix and like abc owns all of them down sunset and hollywood boulevard all of them they don't all of them do so we're smart yeah i get it so we're trying to get one and we've been working out for months months then finally something happened where one popped up off hollywood boulevard popped up and how much is it they tell me like i'll take it you know cool but once you know it's off hollywood boulevard and it's it's during the netflix

89:02um big uh festival and it's right where dave chappelle's performing but it for some reason it's open like but you know we didn't know in the next hour like hold on it's hollywood boulevard and all those comedy fans come in i'll fucking take it dude i'll take it right now so we get fucking got this billboard they just put it up i think last night this fucking giant billboard off hollywood boulevard i don't think it does anything as far as views because it's so fucking old school it's more just a flex yeah when i went to meet with everybody they told me billboards i'm like okay i'll do that but it's literally just to show you know and obviously i have some other resource because i have a team behind me but i can you know shoot my own special cut the sizzles commercials billboard whatever these networks offer i can do yeah and you don't have to share it and that's the thing it's

89:48like how many i want how many people are involved in a network production like if you're going to do a comedy central special how many people do you have to talk to how many how many people at the network have to approve it how much how much there's a lot going on i went down and then also it's only on at you know tuesday night at 8 00 or whenever they decide to put it on how many times after that do they have to air it and is it going to be on the streaming site but and okay what kind of traffic is your streaming site correct it's one of those things like what the beautiful thing about youtube is that it has a built-in massive massive audience and if something's good people share it and it's easy to share it's they've got it down they know how to do it and you can cut clips and then people can share clips and then also when i met with them i said okay this is you know again i did all myself

90:34i didn't hire a publisher anything like that so i was like just through my connections these are the shows i'm gone this out this is how many people will reach yeah like so i'm just gonna give that to you guys i can do it there's there's no reason you know it's also all it does is limit your reach for a specific amount of money it's like they give you a specific amount of money to limit the reach of your show that's really what they're doing it used to be that like they were like if you got a comedy central special or if you got the ones that really uh work now are netflix hbo and maybe showtime those those still really work because they do have apps that a lot of people use but if you you wanted to look like what's the difference between what one of their apps what kind of traffic they get versus

91:16youtube correct it's not even close it's crazy youtube's crazy also and also also if you're going to do it for free and just release it you could release it on facebook you can release it on youtube you can release it on vimeo as many clips as you want what is it rumble rumble put it on rumble you could put it on odyssey roku there's a lot of things you could put it on and that's for you ultimately it's an advertisement to people to come see you to say come see me live that's and that's the way you know i you know i came up different than you did where you know when you were coming up especially i even say netflix now it's a little different but when you're coming up you know maybe eight guys got specials you know but now it's more of like an advertisement just you know you're doubling down your shelf come see me on the road yeah if you like this i'll be here you know yeah yeah that's all

92:03it is and the the thing about stand-up specials as opposed to anything else is you don't need anybody else like you need someone else if you want to film a show like if you have a the idea for like some sort of a sitcom and you wrote it you wrote in these characters you're gonna need people you need camera people sound people lighting people you're gonna need set people set designers you're gonna need a lot of shit like then it makes sense to plug into an existing network correct because it's like okay i'm we're in the creative side and you guys are in the facilitating side and the you know executive side let's uh let's get together and have some fun that makes sense but with comedy it's like what exactly is are is your part what are you doing yeah you're deciding what i can and can't say that's all you're doing yeah like you're not there's no real budget other

92:55than the set and the set you know and the crew which and the crew my crew shot it but and the cameras were mine but it's like we have all that nothing like a show no not at all the moving parts of a show you're talking to what in the sets and insurance and all that all the different cast members yeah to know their lines that makes sense rehearse there's writers and there's revisions it's a different animal than stand-up so when they jump in in the stand-up world i don't think it's necessary i don't think it's good for us because then you start dealing with other people's ideas of what you should and shouldn't say versus your idea like there's some stuff that i did in the past that i wouldn't do now on stage the bits that i did that i wouldn't do anymore but if you look at the overall thing of it what i could say is that i it was all what i wanted to do yeah i tried it out and maybe

93:46i didn't like the reaction or maybe i didn't think about it the same way that i think about it now or but it's all a process of learning and getting better at it as soon as you interject other people into that process like you're subject to their whims and then people have egos they're going to be like oh i'm the one who told them to wear this or i'm the one who told them to not say that and you know let's do the special in black and white especially right now especially right now especially when i was shopping it it was a bit of a different time than it even is now you know i have some bits about vaccines and newsome and garcetti and they're like dude we're cutting this and i in the meeting room you know again i'm not i'm not where you're at so i was like well i guess i could compromise on that and then i would go back and you know i just i just feel like you know i'm like why am i doing this

94:32what you know why the would i cut that stuff i love that stuff yeah it works people dig it you know what this guy decide and for what man and then i think too i saw you know like the way they vilified you and the media and stuff like that and it's just like this is all malarkey like what and you're gonna bow down to this dude for what you want to be there's different people be accepted by by who do who what approval are you looking for there's different people there's regular people the people that are around when they're having a drink at your house when there's no cameras when it's just you and another person that's that's people when they're at their most normal and then there's people when they're in corporate positions and then there's people that are in these jobs we have to abide by this rigid set of rules of how do you do things and you know behavior and what you dress like and

95:26you know but also they don't want to be responsible for who who greenlit that who allowed them to do that what are you guys doing they start getting backlash yeah like what the fuck are you doing man then they take it down right and you sold it to them but that that world of not you know not having control of your life like there's consequences to not having control of your life there's consequences to being like an executive where you're working 16 hours a day five six days a week and you never do anything else you're obsessed you're yeah i'm sure you have a nice car i'm sure your house is amazing you're paying sure you're balling i'm sure you're ball comes out of price though but there's a you're paying a heavy price and the difference between the price that an executive pays versus the price that a comic pays it's quite different you know so when people say you work hard like sure

96:10that's something you love to do yes but real working hard is doing something you fucking hate because you don't want your kids to be hungry that's that's real working hard i don't do any of that no yeah again you're you're the north star man for a lot of comics and i think even with me at the level and put on youtube and getting the billboards and shooting the commercial and sizzle and all my team doing it it shows you you know we'll see what happens with it nothing i can do now but it's like you don't need anybody dude you don't if the material is good it speaks for itself well what people will find you need is friends and that was that's one of the best things about this internet culture as opposed to the culture that existed before it was like for comics at least we would try to get on sitcoms we would try

96:51to get a spot on like a late night talk show was the key if you get a late night even if a small network offered you a late night talk show oh my god it's a big deal and there's only a certain amount of spots it was like dog eat dog dude that's exactly the problem was and then when the internet opened up we all looked at it differently because we realized like well we actually benefit from being around each other benefit from helping each other and again i think you established that culture and comedy especially at a time where it wasn't really like highlighted you know you look at like with my special man dude andrew schultz and his team i didn't ask him for anything dude i didn't say hey help me out nothing he hit me up hey man when you shouldn't you i'm gonna come make sure it's ready to go i know what he's amazing he was i'm gonna come out where are you taping at and it's middle

97:38pandemic i gotta run you know my hour i'm running the hour the half an hour half an hour hour show he was where are you taping at i'm he was shooting a movie with eddie murphy and for netflix something and he goes i'm gonna pull up to the late show i'm gonna sit there and watch it as a fan dude and let you know i didn't ask him to do any of this dude he comes after being on set all day schultz he comes watches it we talk in the back and then he goes uh let me know man because you know i know the youtube algorithm that should look stuff like that and then has just been here's here's my team him and akash here's my fucking team dude any questions you have use us so my team connect with his team and then even you know people know you always support me but like even you and to stefano and stuff was like send me send it to me man like i'm gonna the edits here and just stuff that you know

98:26you guys have so much more experience like what you guys say i'm sure as hell listening you know so it's like you and i i really give you the credits like you create this culture where we help each other out and in turn i do the exact same with chappelle and all these guys and that well that's a culture that comes from martial arts i agree martial arts you need trainers you need training partners as good as your training yeah you need coaches you need training partners everybody works together and you're always helping people with different things that you see because you also realize that it helps you like i always tell this uh story about my friend brent when he went to um uh when he first started training at uh 10th planet he was really good you know it's good we always had fun battles we always uh rolled together hard and then he started teaching and the leap that he made

99:15within one year was crazy yeah and i remember i had this conversation with him i was like how how'd you get better so much so quick like you're so much better and he said dude it's all the teaching because i'm i i have these paths like solidified in my head and instead of like guessing in the chaos i know what's going on next slows it down yeah slows it down and i think that that applies to comedy too i think the helping of guys coming up helps everybody because the more you talk about stand up and the way you do it the more it kind of affirms the value of it and like that there's a discipline to it and that you know there's other guys that are doing the same thing i'm doing just doing it a different way and you learn it inside out as you're helping yeah helping coaching you know you can take stuff from

100:02that and apply it to your own yeah like when you see a friend's bit and it's too wordy there's too many words in it you're like too many words yeah like is you a person that is only seeing it once fresh eyes you have a way better perspective for the most part than the person that's actually saying it because the person that's saying it they've thought it through maybe i'll say it this way maybe i'll say it that way and then they say it and maybe when they're saying it they're a little confused like oh i gotta explain this better and there so they add a little extra words to it and it just makes it kind of clunky you could see that yes on the outside if you're like a a comic watching a comic like ah this is all you gotta get all that out what this is what you're trying to say you're trying to say this and go straight to that and that's that's something that even if i can't tell

100:52you how to do stand up because everybody's different you know you got your william montgomery's you got your david lucas everybody's different and then you got your neil brennans and then you got you know you got your sebastrius everybody's got a different style but there's one thing is like get to the point yes like the economy of words seems to be one of those core principles that you can kind of apply to almost everybody's act when you got a lot of bunch of nonsensical shit that you could explain far quicker you're taxing people's attention span the only reason why they're listening is because they've entrusted in you that you're going to be funny or interesting you know how to do this yeah funny or interesting i think that's why it's cool to see louis ck working it out because you could tell the bits that he's been doing that were monsters and you know it was a shit sandwich

101:36so it was great in the beginning great at the end in the middle he could tell that was his new shit it was cool to see him right try and fit at his level won a grammy yep for best fucking comics 2021 while being canceled in the fucking middle of the storm that's how good he is at stand up yeah when a fucking grammy you know yeah and not only that i think he won a grammy for the one that's not as good as the newer one agree i think that one sincerely louis ck is great it's very funny but then sorry is even better even better even better so it was cool to see even i hope he wins two years in a row me too how about probably well after seeing his shit it's cool to see at his level this guy's been doing it forever yeah to see him a little chunky a little clunky in the middle and then comes back and you know he says what's up he's cool he's super polite but then he's on his notepad he's

102:26writing writing notes writing notes right notes yeah don't seem at the late show slowly tightening it up i'm like there's no other way to do it man yeah that's everybody goes through the same whether you're joe rogan louis ck kevin hart or an open mic er that's a this is the process i got a new bit i'll tell you about it uh after the show but on tuesday it killed and on wednesday it sucked last night did it's just i'll tell you about it later i'll tell you about it later i don't want to talk about it i had to go out of the room you know i've seen you do stamp in a while and the crowd was going fucking ape shit you know you i like to bullshit because i haven't seen tony and the guys in a while so i was bullshit and then i'm like oh fuck i see joe said i go out there and it's that place was fucking i text you last night i'm like dude yeah i'm gonna you're fucking i'm rocking i'm getting ready

103:10to film something i'm trying to figure out when but i feel like i gotta i gotta let this baby out of my pussy i've been holding on to this comedy baby for too long you're at a different for you too it's like there's so many eyeballs on you good or bad there's so many so it's like yeah but i have freedom no i'm with you it doesn't matter it's gonna go great no matter what i can show people how to live with eyeballs on you correct there's nobody you're built for the job there's a reason you're built like that dude so it's you know it's you're gonna have so many eyeballs on it and then you know the material is so fucking good it just shoves it down their throat even more because if it was bad all right this is a nightmare you know i'm leaning into it it's fun yeah it's like and it's also like the enthusiasm of the people that are coming to see the shows is amazing i just feel i'm

104:00i'm just super lucky i'm very fortunate you know in a lot of ways man very fortunate super happy yep but you also work very hard dude don't you know don't get away from it i don't work too hard i work hard enough i gotta balance an act that i'm doing i'm trying to do the miyamoto musashi thing as applies to has applied to comedy and obsession like i give myself this one i think if i was going to give a advice to anybody who's obsessed with comedy i could use this advice i have a problem have another thing that you're also obsessed with give give yourself one more thing that's a secondary thing like you got your a thing that's your career but you should have a b thing so if you bomb and you're still good at the b thing you could still like you know there's a process not gonna jump your whole life yeah it's like one of the things that is a problem with fighters is that their whole life is fighting

104:46so a loss is insanely devastating and it's so i don't have to tell you this yeah in order to gain back your feeling of like like identity you have to go fuck somebody else up because that's all you're known for it you're only associated with that and if your last time out was a loss yeah dude when i say the valleys are low i've ate dick on a stage before dude it's just you know it happens to everybody i've ate dick many of times at the comedy store the improv or laugh factory i've ate all the fucking cocks yeah and don't get me wrong it sucks yeah but i can go across town and do another show and redeem myself or figure it out or go up the next night but the the lows in fighting are so low it's so devastating i i i i don't know if there's anything maybe losing super ball throwing interception in the fourth quarter i don't think so because there's other people yeah i know they

105:40share in it dude it's the the the the peaks and the valleys are it there's no in between it's like you win it's dude oh my god i remember i would like when i knocked out chris tusha shirt was he was 20 and one brock lesnar's training partner i knocked him out and whatever a minute and seven seconds i remember getting to the back and just get on my hands and knees and crying being so happy that i didn't get hurt and i got a win and i was moving on to the next step whatever that is it's gabriel gonzaga i was so relieved man and i was i was so relieved i didn't let my teammates down and my training partners and there's so so many moving pieces that go into it's just so much more than the fighter and i was so relieved that you know i'm i'm gonna get my win bonus and be able to pay them morick and they have families and kids like people don't think about all the stuff that's

106:28affected with that right and then the valley is so low man i i can't you know i get emotional talking about it's so low dude so when those guys lose at that level it's uh there's nothing like it man and i you know i i do think that's helped me out so much in comedy and in stand up you know because it can get dark you know especially for a guy like me coming to comedy looking the way i do you know being my size and being this weird oddball in this comedy world which is filled with oddballs already but i'm even that's the thing is like that's what bothers me is like i am accustomed to being around savages right i'm accustomed to being around guys like you and fighters and from all the years of working with the ufc and all my years of martial arts it's normal to me and thank god man thank god dude i don't have a career brother thank god dude thank god you were

107:21like yeah i know he looks fucking weird dude i know he doesn't look like us but he's shot man he's funny he's fucking shot and you're a super nice guy man the thing is like there's some mean shitty people out there you're not one of them you're a super nice guy and so what people are being to you i'm like man there's people to be mean to you want to make fun of them like he makes fun of himself make fun of everybody trust me you can't say anything that i don't think of myself that stuff doesn't bother me but i bet here's the thing joe if i'm i was built for this you that doesn't affect me i know coming from football and fighting darkness of losses and fighting bro they don't understand oh there's no lower you're gonna tweet at me there's so many fighters knocked out in brazil dude bro i think i was there for that one yeah dude hold on was i there for that one yeah i'm sure

108:15yeah it was the first time they used to win brazil in i don't know how long it was the co-main event against no gear it's like fighting what was the main event uh anderson silva forrest griffin dude it's like fighting michael jordan for that it's like fighting michael jordan in chicago everybody hated me my family flew out there i got paid 16 and 16 to fight no gara who i supposed to starch dude and you know you're getting a lot of shit for that so it's like you were never supposed to start no gear i was a heavy favorite yeah but whoever's talking to you like that oh no i'm just as far as the odd makers he wasn't that old then i know yeah i was in brazil and i would have warned you heavily about that i could have used that yeah i wish i was there in your corner but i would have said patience yeah i'm gonna said you can't rush in on this motherfucker and i rocked him with an

109:02uppercut he's one of the most durable guy that's ever existed could have yeah he could tell me that i ran over by a truck when he was a kid i know that's why he has that big scar yeah that guy in the bobsap yesterday when bob sap fucking pile-drived him broke his neck yeah his neck was fun he's never been the same never been the same nice guy in the world here's the cool we were talking about this on the bj podcast was that before or after the fedor fights i don't think we ever resolved that no garib bob sap yeah that was before the fedors was it before the fedor fights that's too bad that's too bad because bob sap was 375 with abs i mean he really was all natural yeah 100 from earth completely stuff from earth dude he's natural lotus from earth dude he fought the whole 50 it's from earth he was so big he was the greatest uh physical presence that the combat

109:58sports world has ever known didn't have bob sap in his prime hey then he beat ernesto who's twice twice yeah yeah yeah it's a big deal man even though even though you know it was the hulk versus captain america yeah i'm saying it was yeah but cro-cop flatlined him remember that cro-cop broke his eyeball yeah how about when i fought cro-cop in the back i was watching cro-cop's old highlights no yeah because i i watch those dude i'm savage i needed that and i wish i had done that the same process for the noguera fight i was like he's old and washed i'm a starchest dude in brazil but for cro-cop i was so amped up for that because i went into that fight watching all those old highlights because i i was expecting that version so you'll see i'm super focused in that fight yeah ready to go man yeah right i had a fucking war on my hands yeah noguera you know somewhere along the lines after

110:54knocking out cro-cop all the press and media and beyond covers of magazines as a young kid i got super cocky and i paid for it but but again i wouldn't change anything but when you talk about the valleys of fighting and just life when you know you fought on a saturday and most people go home on a sunday i was so sure i was going to starch noguera in brazil i flew my family friends out and we stayed another seven days jesus so i'm there with a black guy i concussed walking around rio de janeiro with my family dude oh my god oh my god on on pay-per-view that i'm sure a lot of people saw it too on brazil well yeah all of brazil saw all of brazil so you're walking through dude oh but they were they were so grateful they they were so nice to me man and imagine if you would chael sonnen oh i know dude but but again or connor oh my god talk shit about brazil oh my god but again all that stuff

111:49all that stuff oh my god who's talked more shit than colby we'll get there dude moment for beast over doom hit it with a boomerang but dude going through that shit it's like i have this armor on me man right they got me ready for comedy so you know i'm like a fucking racehorse i'm like this joe yeah all this stuff i don't see any of you i post and ghost and i i i tell my team like only let me know the positive stuff life is too good man yeah things are great man i live in the real world too it's like when you were going through all your shit you know you're on every fucking headline and all that stuff i realized how much bullshit it is online that it really opened my eyes and that's like how it helped me out to be honest because i realized how much bullshit all that that media is and it's not real dude because they need clicks and they're getting clicks now that trump's out they need clicks off

112:40you and i realize it's so much bullshit and i we get calls from friends and family because they know we're close like dude your buddy joe you believe this hold on did you read the article do you know the guy like close family dude like there's there's nobody in my life that has done more for me than joe rogan and you're reading this fucking article i'm telling you and i go do you trust me yeah i'm fucking telling you man they couldn't be more off but then when i would go you know every morning i go the same coffee shop or you know go get my foods and i would have interactions with people that wasn't the same narrative nobody people were like dude how about joe you know he's this there's this no they're like dude you believe this bullshit man can you believe that was the majority of people the real people the benefit of having a podcast is the people that know you they know you correct

113:31they they don't know you like like you can't hide you know you're that's who you are with everything you say everything you do that's who you are good or bad the the thing that's different between podcasts and anything where you're on a network is that someone else even if you you fuck up and say stupid shit like whoopie goldberg and they suspend you but you're you only get there if you get chosen there's a way that you can do it where you have to like there's commercials you have to get everything in in seven minutes and then there's next commercial and you're dealing with a lot of filters a lot of variables so if you get in trouble they don't really know what you're like like what is what is she like when the camera's off like is that a professional way of talking correct what is that professional way of talking when someone's like okay so what we learned today in a

114:27poll is that 54 of americans don't believe that joe biden like really who are who talks like that what is this what is that right so that thing doesn't resonate with people no because if you were in a room with her and it was just you and her and she was talking like that that would be crazy like why are you talking like this this is this is nuts but it's accepted that you talk like that on television on these shows and then the thing becomes the only way to get any attention is to argue so everybody's arguing especially on that show and they're talking over each other it's a nightmare this nobody has good views that doesn't work with people it doesn't feel right not the masses like it might work with you know some of those dummies out there but in general like you gotta remember like i learned early on that social media is not real you gotta remember i go on the road i talk to

115:13real people i see them the meet and greets i see these social media represents a population of people that are expressing themselves in a limited format correct it's a format that's only text and you don't experience social cues you say things that you might you know maybe you're a little drunk or maybe you're angry or maybe you feel sad whatever and you say things that are mean and that's a feeling that you have in that moment the problem is that then it's documented and then maybe you don't even feel that way 20 minutes later but you sure as fuck wouldn't say that to whoopie gobert's face if you saw it on the street wouldn't be like hey whoopie yeah you'd be never humans don't act like that it'd be horrible if you did that but people feel so comfortable with doing that online so people feel comfortable

115:55with communicating online in a way they would never in person i don't i just don't think that's good the the only time it's good is when maybe maybe you have information and like like if especially if you living under some horrible government sure and you have information that needs to be distributed and you need to be anonymous all for it but other than that it's like i feel like we're we're all moving in a general direction of just trying to have a better society and a better life and it applies to everything we do but the movement would show you know you look at a lot of celebrities where whether they're actors comedians a lot of them aren't engaged in social media anymore they're going that's too risky it's not good for me but that's the difference between podcasts and people that like act

116:47right like of course you're going to engage in social media like this is way more intimate than any social media will ever put out like having a conversation just you and me hanging out like this is way more intimate than any social media that anybody can ever put it's also you and i are so basically the only way we catch up to yeah sometimes sometimes you know we talk on the phone last night yeah i'm just saying and we talk on the phone all the time but i'm just saying as far as three hours right like when theo did your show i call him you know he's all nervous and he goes man i i don't talk to my therapist for three hours man he goes shit i haven't talked to my mom for three hours he's the funniest guy in the world he's the best the the best he's such a he's such an interesting dude because him and i are and that's why the king this thing in the wing works we're so opposite where

117:33i'm like a i'm like you i'm like a shark if i'm not moving i go crazy dude i have to be working theo's the exact opposite he's like a sloth where if you give him too much work you're gonna break him so so hey dude we have three king of the stings this week what the fuck he you know he likes doing his work and then taking breaks man the guy goes on more vacations than anybody i know well yeah i'm in hawaii bro but he's got a casual style of comedy i think it's probably good for him like again for him again back to your if you're gonna you know write about comics if you wrote theo's process it's i don't know how many people are gonna be able to relate to it but for theo yeah for theo there's no dude hit when him and chris are going dude there's i sit back go to work boys they're so funny man the best job in the world theo has one of the most unique senses of humor i've ever encountered but

118:27if you could get his process down and if someone could talk about him from the beginning the open mic days to really developing new material to who he is now if someone could break that down like that that'd be very valuable just to see his process but his actual his execution yeah it's like good luck with that execution that's theo vaughn there's one theo vaughn there's one theo vaughn and his way of thinking he'll say stuff when we're on the phone talk about like business decisions he'll say stuff where you're like what you can't help him i just friend toby man you're like no no no no i don't give a fuck about toby he got bit by a frog yeah he got bit by a frog man he turned gay man he turned gay so my thing is stay away from the frog like jones says them frogs is gay so i'm talking about taxes right yeah he's just he's so unique man he's the best i remember the first time i saw him really

119:17kill the comedy store like i'd seen him around and maybe i hadn't seen like a full set but i'd seen like a few jokes but i've been friendly with him you know and then one day i was in the back of the room and he was just murdering he was so comfortable on stage he was so relaxed he was himself yeah he was himself because remember people forget theo came off uh road rules that's that's where people knew theo from road rules doing mtv and all that shit so he had that stigma on him you know so theo came out of that shell and maybe it was david spade i forget him and david are really close and david's like theo took off once he started being himself on stage once because in person he's the funniest fucking person most unique person he's a fucking alien with a mullet dude and a big ass like he's so fucking funny yeah but that wasn't correlating on stage well it wasn't it wasn't

120:07developed yet it's like you know you you start off as a white belt it's just what it is you know he just hadn't figured it out yet dude he was doing jiu jitsu he is yeah yeah i think at chandler's gym in nashville shout out to chandler and he'll call me like man this he just can't help it he's just so funny like man this fucking big bitch sherry man fucking tweaked my arm dude i don't know if i'm going back i don't know if i'm going back i don't know if i'm going back i'm gonna rest on a few days think about it and you're just like but he's dead serious some woman arm part of bro women who are really good they love fucking dudes up oh my god oh my god they love fucking dudes up dude but yeah fuck it he can't help it man and they'll be like i'm a fucking two-stripe white belt man give him this hard scarf and go

120:56fucking hard scarf he's so fucking funny he's a perfect example of like how you there's no blueprint to follow for comedy it's not possible no everybody's different man especially that guy you can't there's no way but you know i get a lot of advice from theo too because remember he had that stigma on him they came from the real world and he wasn't a comic and you know he's this hack and so same thing come from the ufc it takes a while man it takes a while but it's like the thing is it's like if you're coming straight from the ufc or straight from a reality show you're an open mic er with too much attention correct and you really are an open mic i'm starting if you're the the boldest motherfucker that ever lived is charlie murphy because charlie murphy was doing headline sets like right after he got into comedy also with you well he did those a few years later

121:48though that was a couple years in still but still beastie bold very bold do you think about having a fucking showtime special when you're two years into yeah it's nuts yeah very big balls dude at least charlie didn't film it yeah true but he uh someone said bigger balls he had this you know opportunity and there's only one way to do it you got to learn on the job there's no other way to do another way you get you gotta learn on stage man you need a lot of dick but the problem is you can't do that in a large crowd you don't learn in a large crowd no large crowds are not intimate they're not forgiving like uh did you see that ti thing in brooklyn uh which which part i did stand up and he was bombing you know he's bombed a bunch i've only seen him bomb once yeah it's like i was looking at the crowd it was too many people i'm like bro for and you know and he'll say and i you know who am i

122:46to tell anybody not to stand up i don't give a fuck dude i'm not right good for you look at me yeah i don't judge anybody i ain't nobody i don't give a fuck right do whatever you want to do dude but with him i you know david lucas knows him and uh david did a roast with him lit him the fuck up so him and david attacks i said i said you don't go a long way for him and i said this comes from a guy like me and i'm not ti ti goes i'm not i'm not a comedian i'm a superstar ditch that what you should do and i even told emily this at the store you gotta humble yourself i told emily i said i know i'm headlining selling out shows i'll i'll work the fucking potluck emily i'll come there i'll work the door i don't give a fuck what it takes for you to give me stage time at or i don't give a fuck man i'll do i'll do the trash whatever you want man whatever it takes you let me know let me

123:34know i'll do it i'll fucking scrub the floors for five minutes in the fucking or at potluck i don't care you gotta humble yourself if if you're coming into it with already a built-in kind of fan base and for him it's like obviously he's a massive star has some hits right back in the day had some hits but then he's coming in and not only is he coming in like the laugh factor in a comedy store which is a whole nother issue but he's coming there and he's bumping guys and running the light so i think for him he doesn't have anybody in his crew that knows comedy if someone would come and go hey dude and it's fine you're playing here don't run the light dude so he just shows up and goes on stage mm-hmm they let him on stage and then i'll do like 30 minutes but again do you man it takes a lot of balls to do it all the respect to you but don't run the light because here's the thing when

124:22you run the light that other comic you're taking away from his time or the crowd gets tired or you ate shit if he's bumping the show he's probably just doing whatever he wants anyway you know that's what i'm saying so it's like someone you know his obviously his security guards and all them don't know how comedy works so someone i told david just let him know like these are the inside baseball rules where we're not going to hate him as much just let him know the rules so and then if he knows the rules and still does it then he's just an asshole but if you know but if i don't think he knows the rules and that's an issue well he probably don't doesn't think the rules apply because he's a famous person oh they do bubba trust me they do well if you want to do it right they should if you want to learn you know jujitsu you got to start as a white belt don't think because you're famous all of a

125:09sudden you're going to be a purple belt no you do white belt in the gi you're going to be able to like step into like sparring class and do well no you're not going to do well what are you talking about yeah it's not that much different than going on stage and trying to do jokes when you're kind of just starting out agree like you have to treat it like despite your success and another discipline you have to treat it like you're a beginner because you are and the only way the other people that are doing it are going to respect you is if you do treat it like you're a beginner and put the work in that's how you get the respect from your peers yeah you know you gotta put the work in man because when they see you just going up you know in these big shows you're like get the fuck out of here man yeah well doesn't blake griffin do stand up and isn't he good um you know i

125:52wouldn't say just you know barely talks about it yeah you see what i'm saying yeah he'll do the roast stuff like that but he's not like he's funny dude we were me and you and we're with him at the improv when he's getting ready to do the roast who'll do the roast he's a funny guy he also has whatever 600 million dollars in the bank and all these properties so you know i don't think he's right sets at the haha right i'm saying like he's just doing his thing but the point is he's low-key about it yeah he's not bumping people right take what he can get he's a humble guy if you i mean you don't have to but there's so many clubs all you have to do is like make a phone call and like set up your own show you want to run an hour or whatever you want to do like set up your own show it's not hard there's a lot of clubs ton of clubs and they and they want the the they want butts in seats man

126:36that's really the best way to do it anyway the best way to do it anyway it's like have all the time in the world you know you you have some subjects you want to cover you you you if these people are willing to go along with you in this process of you learning how to do stand up you can do that they'll all come to see you do it that way and they'll watch you grow and mature do it that way yep but those giant shows giant shows that they're not there for you like i think he was doing like a rap concert and got up there it's like bro is that what it was it was some bullshit i don't know what it was i thought it was a big comedy show i don't know i know he did one that was very suspect i'm like dude again the team around you's like hey man these aren't good parameters for stand-up comedy yeah but could you imagine telling like an artist baby was on before you man

127:21you know it was really i don't know it's bullshit you imagine telling those artists what they can and can't do i mean they're successful in a crazy business you know in comedy i can yeah you know i'm saying like hold on hold on you know that put whatever come you know bill burr's on at 10 motherfucker right and it's 9 40 right you better be off by fucking 10 right because he gets you bump him dude what are you doing well that's the thing that guys used to do back in the day i know it was who could bump who you know such a flex guys would enjoy bumping people you know and they would they would show up and uh try to go on right before so like someone had a girl with them like you're gonna see me baby i gotta my name's on the marquee and they would like bump right in front of them going in front of them and do like long sets and i got bumped at the comedy store in the belly room uh

128:14they wouldn't tell me who and then me and me this is years ago me and jim gafkin were uh dming each other back and forth i love jim he's the nice guy ever and then i'm like they're like hey do you mind uh we know she was going at 10 can you do 10 30 now i'm like yeah i don't give a fuck whatever you want literally we'll do whatever they want at the comedy store i have no business being there and then i'm standing just watching i this i feel a large presence over my shoulder here hello instagram friend and i turn around it's fucking jim gafkin oh yeah bumper he goes yeah he goes up and crushes he's so funny he's very funny that's hilarious hello it's hello instagram friend that's i mean you bump me jim yes yeah well i mean yeah do whatever the fuck you want man yeah he yeah well he deserves a certain position in comedy but all those people that like that bump and don't deserve it they they

129:10haven't earned that and it's like it's a tricky thing among comics i never did it i'm not a bumper i would just call in nor should you be yeah you should be but even at the highest level you like you're talking about now you've never done it kevin hart doesn't really kevin hart doesn't do it but even at the highest level dave chappelle my first time ever headlined at the comedy store i can i couldn't figure out why they asked me to headline the belly room like really i'm only two years what and emily goes yeah you know if you want to do belly room wednesday night 8 p.m i'm like yeah stay last fuck yeah i'll do it so i'm all excited to get down i'm like i the whole time i'm gonna wonder why they're asking me to do it there's so many comics what was game at the time it was game six of the world series and of the dodgers so there's nobody around it and so i'm back there and there's like i

129:56don't know fucking seven tickets sold i felt like i was such a loser and i'm in the back and dave chappelle walks in and uh dave walks in he goes hey man you you mind if i go on i was like what he goes you mind if i go whatever you want to do man and he was getting ready for something special at the time and uh seven people i would uh no shit joe not even exactly maybe let's say 14 it's the game six of the world series and the dodgers are in it nobody's around dave goes up there and i go whatever you want to do man uh do you mind if i go first though he goes whatever man whatever so i go up you know do my thing and then he goes up he does an hour and i don't know hour and a half for these 14 people and wow annihilated like it was mass square garden annihilated 14 people 14 people that's amazing and then comes back and i was able you know i talked to him i don't know probably

130:48fucking 45 minutes just me and him you know but what bummed me out and you know it's not his fault but he wanted to talk about fighting oh yeah well he probably wanted to relate to you yeah and i you know i wanted to talk to him about comedy so right it's triggering for both right it's because he he's probably like dude i don't know all anybody talks about is comedy i'd like to talk about fighting all i want to talk is comedy he wants to talk about fighting so we have this back and forth and he was vaping he goes my doctor said these uh he smoked cigarettes he goes my doctor said these are actually better for you they're not he goes how do you know i'm just fucking google it dude they're not he was really oh no he fucking threw in the trash really yeah he was great though man he was so nice again nice to me man he's a great guy so long dave's a sweetheart of a guy

131:33he's just uh he's a real artist you know he's like he listens to the same nina simone song he listened to the same nina simone song like six seven times in a row once before uh we did a show at stubs in austin he just kept playing it on youtube and so he had like the video of nina simone singing it and he would play it just over the bluetooth speaker sometimes he's like this one song he became obsessed with and it was uh having these shows with him it's like seeing what he is an artist you know he said this is his his canvas his canvas is talking shit one of the best to ever do it man for me there's like these milestones like that you know 14 people i'm bummed the out and then chapelle rolls in you know it's like you know you're gonna masters and you know stand up watching from this guy and you're

132:24watching he's giving you tips and stuff like that even though i had to give him some fight information you know i think at the time i had to break down connor versus Eddie alvarez some shit i gotta pee so bad really yeah i outlasted you on the piss game this morning this is a first brother first yeah come back we'll be right back and we're back oh that's a first dude yeah i tap out every now and then the thing is man if uh if i work out or if i get in the sauna in particular i i tend to over drink after the sauna it's a real problem really oh like water yeah yeah no i don't mean alcohol imagine yeah yeah i can no but uh after the sauna you know you you fucking sweat your ass off for 25 minutes and you want to drink as much water as possible but then it's like hour and a half after that since i got into stand-up dude i just

133:12drink these days yeah yeah only drinking but you look thin yeah dude yeah keep keep your body optimized oh dude i'm everything working best shape i've been in i don't know how long like even if you if you watch the special which uh dropped today uh uh hashtag the gringo poppy on youtube thick boy youtube the gringo the gringo poppy i just light my latin family up for 30 minutes oh boy yeah my girl salt though she's fine with it but uh if you watch that special i was not on uh carnivore oh and i'm the definition of thick and i like i did you know i hate this part you know this you're the same you you know you gotta go through the edits and cut this and i'm like fuck dude how did i not go on a diet for this fucking special what was i thinking you don't see yourself the way other people see you yeah and

133:58then i see i'm like oh my god but then it's like all right well at least i was thick my brand's thick boy so i keep getting skinny i'm fucked dude there's a fine line right i do those but also what got me into carnivore was talking to you doing it and how great you felt like really and i you know i'm always down for something i've done every you name it i've done it vegan keto you've always done it but i started doing those tough mutters and i was like i need to lose some if i'm gonna run you know a 15k marathon with all this shit i need to lose some weight so i started doing carnivore i dropped a bunch of weight and i figured once i get done with the tough mutter i'll just eat all the carbs and you know fuck the diet i felt so good i got done with the the tough mutter and was like i'm just gonna keep

134:39going let's see how long i can go and then you know here we are and then i've done two tough mutters since then they call them thick mutters now people sign up do the thick mutters with me it's me and all these fucking thickies some people dude some people get out like really really you think you're gonna do this and they do really mitch roan did the last one with me did he really dude so i flew i flew in for the fight campaign and he goes you're doing a tough mutter tomorrow yeah man there's the thick mutter if you want to sign up let me know i go you know i'm leaving at nine if you want to ride he goes fuck out dude this be fun i go right right uh you know it's 15k though dude so it's like we're right around nine miles he's all but it's like obstacles and shit i'm like yeah it's like muddy get electrocuted you gotta climb shit like it's pretty tough man he goes no i'll do it with

135:23you i go yeah sure um have you been running though he goes oh fuck dude i've ran like eight years right right um it's gonna be tough dude he's not be fun yeah it'd be fun we start going dude shout out to mitchron for even trying it but 30 minutes and then i turn around i'm like where the fuck's matt and some of the guys running with me a thick motor like oh he he told me to tell you that he'll see you at the at the finish line and he's like dude i just can't my legs were giving out you can't do it yeah a fucking nine mile tough mutter if you don't work out at all yeah yeah that's crazy they're so fun man yeah oh they're fun now when you do that how long does it take to do nine miles uh with the courses and everything dude the electrocution sucks i know tough mutter likes it you know but i fucking hate it why do they like it i i don't know i i guess it's good for like instagram social

136:18media but i fucking tough mutter i can't explain this enough i hate it dude and when do you get electrocuted uh there's different parts so there's one part where you know you're running and then you stop for the fucking obstacle course and then it's a just a a fucking dugout hole of mud water and then hanging up above you is like tentacles like wires if you touch them you get electrocuted so you gotta be smart and navigate your way through it what let me see this that's it those are electrocuted yes they hurt so bad oh my god that dude just dove through yeah that dude is me oh look at you i can't even tell your face you're also covered in mud i can't even recognize you that's hilarious bro bro i blew up both hamstrings oh no did you really yeah i ran that chapelle did chapelle my brother did it and they finish in five hours which is dead last but they finished is the point they finished five

137:15hours so now because people want to run them with me i think the next one's in july or august bro that that we just saw show that again what we just saw going up that ramp oh we got a jump yeah that is fucking dangerous oh some dude blew his kneecap shattered his kneecap doing that yeah it's so fun though dude i'm telling you that it's more about it's not like you know you don't have to be fucking i tell people this all the time you don't have to be lance armstrong and do this it's more about like doing it together it's a team thing it's not about why don't you guys just fuck just get together all the guys i'd be down for that in the mud doesn't that seem like what's happening here let's kill each other and get eaten by vultures it's like the ultimate bro bonding oh dude that's tear gas this one's tear gas you gotta go through it hold your breath and eyes and rush through how long before women

138:02uh infiltrate your organization and start entering into these games oh they're women have done it how many girls uh maybe five but there's one girl some of the girls are badasses that's amazing yeah this stuff i i crushed the where you gotta climb and stuff you know i have good grip but the oh jesus the electrical shit that's mark harley he ate shit on that yeah that's freezing cold water it's so fun though dude so who organizes this who puts it together the first one i did um just who builds the fucking holes tough mother does it all so they do all over the all over the world dude so you had a conversation with them and said i'd like to do one no not at all i just i've always wanted to do it since my goal is to do an iron man that's all this starts i want to do an iron man yeah yeah let's talk to felder yeah i know you see what he's doing yeah he's a monster that motherfucker he's

138:54like changed his body yep i love him so i just signed up for one and then i uh asked my crew who wants to do it and you know mark harley and some other guys want to do it and then i'm there and i'm taking pictures with everybody like i'm trying to get this the finish line i'm just bombard pictures which is a good thing and then somebody um from the tough mother's like hey who are you i'm like you know i do stand up and i used to fight and blah blah blah like oh cool and then i was like uh hey i'm gonna do another one because after i got done i'm like this one of my best things i've ever done i was like it'd be cool to have like my fans run with me i'll announce on the show we'll call it the thick mudder like yeah let's do it and then now we're just doing thick mudders so when it's a thick mudder it's only your fans that enter so how many people are allowed to enter uh it's unlimited but

139:40last time 500 people around with me oh that's crazy yeah that's crazy crazy but the different a lot of people and then there's a 15k and 5k so who won it there's no winning it's who got it the fastest there's some pros there i don't know there's some pros that so you just do it we just do it it's such a good time so it's like a participation trophy yes yes just finishing is the win just getting finished and being electrocuted is the way yeah it's so much fun dude god i fucking love them man and they do them all there's they do them in austin san antonio chicago all over dude wow there's 24 hour ones 24 hour that's not for me so you can run them like all throughout the night yeah it's called the world's toughest mudder look at this 24 hour obstacle course world's toughest mudder jesus christ 24 hours how many people lose use of their legs at the end of this i'd say all of

140:33them i feel like cam haynes would dominate this but my goal is to do adventure in iron man that's why there's there's so many levels to this thing oh my god they're they're they're talking you know they do the moab 240 that's 238 miles that's like one of the longest ones i'm too big for that they're trying to think of doing a 500 mile one yeah there's just too much i'm not into that this is a good time after three hours even if you go slow three hours good time you know hours is a long fucking time it's a long time it's a long time i'll tell you where i fucked up this is where i fucked up i did it in lake elsinore which is like right outside temeclia so i did it there and then that night i was gonna do pop-up shows uh and surprise the fans for chris d'eleia's show in the laugh factory san diego so i do that tough mudder and i was like i'll be fine i do that and i'm exhausted

141:23dude i get i get if i drive to la and i'm my brother you want me to drive you know i'm good i'm falling asleep at the wheel finally i wake up i have all this caffeine i get to the shows and chris goes you look like shit he's you sure you're good i'm like i'm good dude i'm good dude just you can't do it you can't do it you can't do a tough mudder and do thank god i only did whatever 20 minutes if it was like two two hour shows and meet and greets your boy had been fucked yeah you only have so much energy in your body you know i think about all the time when i do meet and greets is when you used to when you used to do meet and greets with everybody yeah after your like chicago theaters and just sit there for hours meeting people yep i think that all the time whenever you know i'll do what what happened at 200 meet and greets and i go through 200 and i get

142:10another show and i'm feeling sorry for myself i'm like oh my god i want my because it's a lot of energy it's good but it's a lot of energy every time like joey used to do this for free and just hours after the show dude yep gangster yeah it just got too weird after a while you got you got it reached like a uh threshold of uh fame that was like unmanageable so you can't just meet everybody can you imagine doing it now no that's that's the problem yeah there was a point where i knew i had to stop doing it and when did you know like what was it just the engagement with the fans it was too much get a little too frantic a little too crazy crazy yeah well you know we weren't doing it with security we're just using the local security at the the venue and they're dicey oftentimes they weren't paying attention at all dude i had a set in kentucky and these two guys in the

143:03front row head head to toe thick boy gear thick boy bike club hat the fucking thick boy shirt the pant head to toe wouldn't stop talking no i'm they're in the fucking they paid vip they're in the front row dude right i have this uh gay bit about being locked down with dudes how much better it'd be if i was locked down with my friends and we fucked each other right and i start doing a gay bit in the middle kentucky dude these boys were not having it and he goes now stop with the gay shit man i'm like whoa whoa whoa dude dude and he keeps chirping and we go hold up dude so i have to stop at this point now they both stand up this is before will smith got you know slapped chris rocks this way before this this fucking eight months ago and uh david lucas is there and my brother and but there's no security dude right so in my head i'm like what the fuck am i and they're just talking shit to me and i'm

143:53lighting them up making fun of them and they have your clothes on dude when i say clothes i'm talking full gear full b-shop fans like thick boys but they were skinny so that makes sense they must have done drugs in the car or whatever so uh they're walking out and the crowd's booing them and as they're walking they want them out they're clapping i go real quick fellas you know how i know you're gay like what they turn around and i fucking light them up i'm like who's sucking whose dick when you get back to your dodge neon back there and for whatever reason that triggered them and he starts walking the stage and i went dude i'm telling you bubba you don't want to step on the stage i'm telling there's nobody up here i will you up dude i'm telling you dude come up here see what happens whatever drug he's on you know he's like all right leaves i get done with the show i'm i'm so pissed

144:41i get i'm like with a i get to the back to my crew my brother who's my road manager and david i'm like where the fuck were you guys and they're like we had no idea i go we're security i go to the manager where the fuck security what are we gonna do and the lady goes sweetheart i'm security i've been here 30 years oh my god you're security she goes yeah oh fuck dude i'm sorry baby i thought you handled it up there but if you were to come on stage she goes hopefully you can handle yourself i'm like that's the security hopefully you can handle yourself that was just kentucky usually they're on it but you know i get all the time almost that every club drives me nuts man we don't have to work tonight you got this we the the boys the security relax i'm like what yeah i'm like what no work harder no dude but that that kind of situation is dangerous if you got some guy who's like walking towards the

145:28stage like you really never know why he's that confident to do that like what's going on with him these boys were on meth or something they were they were mad because they thought that you were homophobic they just hated outside our gaze yeah hey but you it was see that's the thing it's like highlighting it right but making fun of it in that way like i i wish i could like just be hanging out with my friends and then you know like it's like the bit is they get in on it because i go i go i go man if they lock us back down much more fun it'd be if we were with the bros you know much more fun lockdown with the bros and then i go and this is where i fucked up i go fellas think about it and they're all in on the joke i think about it we'd like work out right oh yeah like we play video games all yeah i'm like and at night we'd fuck each other and dude that was just when they're like what the fuck

146:16whoa whoa so but it's a joke are they mad because they don't like gay people that might be what it is well i think it or is it because they're gay and they want to pretend they don't like people there you go okay and that's what i and then when i said i go oh you know how i know you're gay because that offended you that triggered you i go look at the rest of the crowd you always have a good time right except for you two gays bro i fucked up when i said that these boys are not having it these kentucky fucking bluegrass boys were not having it well i hope they fucked each other extra hard that night me too really hope they fucking brought it home man brought it on dodge neon in the thick boy gear the fact they bought all your stuff too and that was so weird dude i had one girl in atlanta just fucking popping off and i lit her up dude and i could feel the crowd turn you know you can

147:04feel it dude we're line tamers i could feel the crowd and she would she had uh she had she was it was in atlanta so it was like an urban crowd and there's a white girl by herself and you know she got drunk and she had a really bad dye job and uh and and you know the the one thing you know the hecklers say you know i'll stop talking when you tell a funny joke i'm like all right sweetie i'll tell you what i'll tell a funny joke when you fix your roots you know just whatever and she her hair's all fucked up because you can tell it fucking hurt her internally and then she would say something the crowd started chanting roots roots roots i could feel them like they were gonna fucking pick this girl apart so i go whoa whoa hold on hold on i can feel it and hold on i go are you done have you i can do this all day sweetie i promise you i can do this all fucking i have a mic this isn't

147:50gonna end well for you i go are we good can we shake out and you're gonna shut up and she goes yes i know everyone be nice to her we're good shake hands she's good for the rest of the show buy six hoodies dude fucking she bought six hoodies she's probably a fan so yeah it's so weird because they don't know what to do it's like if a girl like knows a guy but she doesn't know him like she knows of him and he's right there like maybe she'll say something insulting to get his attention and that's what she was doing yeah it's a terrible idea dude they think they're living in a movie it's like you know i do a show with theo vaughn and chris where all we do is make fun of each other yeah but they think they're living in a movie yeah it's like what do you think i'm gonna do to you you have a flat ass living in

148:30atlanta oh boy what do you think's gonna happen here you know it's like this is a bad idea can a flat ass be truly cured yeah especially now but how much of it is genetics oh all genetics right like i mean there's some white girls who do like deadlifts and shit to build it up but in general it's genetics but like i would like to see where what's the greatest anyone's gotten to from starting from flat i bet there's just some dumpers out there right but not fake i'm not i'm talking real shit me neither like real build up like deadlift squats you know really build up your buns can you build up your buns because it's kind of like guys with calves right like if you look at like the olympia like the knock on like look like john jones yeah you have those tiny little calves yeah it's just he has genetics you can't there's not sure you can do if your calves are small there's

149:18nothing is that the same with asses i don't know can you build up your arms your chest you for sure can make it better but like how much time does it take to go from having a flat butt to having an extraordinary badonkadon i mean if she's eating like sweet potatoes and just putting the work the deep squats lunges deadlift one thing about instagram that it's really showed people is how many women are out there just dedicated to having a hot ass god bless them god bless them but also putting in the real work yeah really setting a standard that a lot of those hoes don't like they get mad when you follow one of these fucking super dedicated fitness gals with ridiculous legs and ass and you're like what the hell she's putting in work work work or you know somebody that might be annavar or whatever you know a lot of those chicks are doing annavar and there's also filters there's there's some account

150:10this girl purposely shows like she'll take a picture of her ass with like with a certain pose and filter and show the real one and you're like jesus christ man it's all smoke and mirrors there is some smoke and mirrors but there's some real asses oh there's some there's some real asses dumpers dude yeah real athletic asses that this is uh if you wanted to look at it like a graph if they had like a like if they were showing a chart of like when the increase in insane asses came i think a lot of it coincides with social media social media and the kardashians the kardash kim kardashian for sure because like back in the day asses weren't a big like jennifer lopez was first of course uh you know baby got back shakira yeah yeah but not like a fattest like kim made it like you know change the game where asses

150:58were cool like she used to get shit she says in high school from a big dumper right now it's pretty cool well it's like there's that kind but then there's the kind of the athlete kind the athlete kind of different that's a different kind of on guys and gals yeah you know what i'm saying just why those kentucky guys want to fight me you know yeah but with girls it's crazy too because then they wear these shoes that accentuates it right so they're standing on their tippy toes walking around with their butt poking out with very little clothes on like the difference between what women are allowed to wear versus what men are are allowed to wear is really extraordinary oh extraordinary it's funny can you imagine if i wore like the cut off jean shorts like make the stallion like baroni wore back in the day yes shout out to baroni shout out to phil baroni classic one of the fun most

151:48fun times i ever had doing commentary was doing commentary with phil baroni legend we had a good time like if i walked in here with those phil baroni make the stallion cut off you can't wear those well imagine if imagine if i'm on stage last night the vulcan with those fucking cut off jean shorts maybe that's your move that's my thing that's my gimmick that's your move just go all the way wear like timberlands with no socks and fucking cut off jean shorts just a bad bitch on stage and a white t-shirt on tank top yeah that's your move just a bad that's your move the bad bitch tour 2022 yeah can you imagine dude i would get booed off the fucking stage maybe guys can't do it but what if you had strong jokes oh they better be hitting them out of the box with fucking banger after banger dude it'd be so distracting but isn't it possible it's you if

152:44you had the material like mark norman could do he's such a good joke writer i go up there with imagine if they use you as a project this is our idea brendan we love you we think you're really good but you're missing something and we think it's a gimmick and here's what we're gonna do we're gonna put you in a couple of we're gonna put you in daisy dukes timberlands i quit i fucking quit man timberlands no socks we're gonna no tank top and uh maybe like wooden beads around your wrist we're gonna call it the bad bitch tour yeah bad for that man no a bunch of old school like scarves remember when dudes used to wear scarves around their wrists yeah you mean johnny depp or chris angel yeah there you go magicians and actors yeah dude when we were at atlanta we went to this mall and they david's from there so he's like hey man be careful that mall i'm like what do you mean he's like they're

153:39like they have shootings all the time dude it's the best mall they have like fire kicks on my sneaker head he's like but dude i'm telling you it's dangerous there we looked it up and there's all these shootings every week but we go you know whatever it takes to get the sneakers so me and the squad the thick boy squad go there and uh i'm there's like gangsters in there there's metal detectors everywhere there's fucking what kind of fucking mall is this bro i wish i could remember the name this mall was nuts the security dude everybody has fucking ar-15s like nuts what dude at a mall at a mall i go up to the the guy that he was a fan and he was like oh what's up b-shop what you doing here man what's up man why do you guys have ar-15s is oh dude last week they were cutting throats in the bathroom i go what he was they're cutting throats in the bathroom i go what the fuck is oh dude every

154:32week there's something popping here usually happens right outside nordstrom so don't go out nordstrom it's like holy fuck so they have a neighborhood in the mall that's the bad neighborhood yeah nordstrom's is the bad neighborhood in the mall the mall is don't go by nordstrom they're cutting the they're cutting throats in the bathroom your boy still in the bathroom jesus yeah but so i couldn't there was like it's it's tough out there's different than la like you know i look different i'm a bigger dude i'm not fucking shaquille o'neal but i look different i'm wearing what i'm wearing now i'm walking through with some dope sneakers and these like gangsters out there staring at me and i'm like oh man we gotta get the fuck out of these guys are eyeballing me and my buddy uh justin elliot who's from atlanta he's been there a ton of times he goes no no dude this is the gay area they don't want to

155:24fight you they want to fuck you there's a gay area of the mall yeah well no that mall attracts like a lot of gay uh does the mall have a gay neighborhood as well as a bad neighborhood probably dude it's the wild west out there really yeah dirty south dude is that crazy this mall is nuts so they thought you were down to well well that's my thing i'm like i'm like dude these guys keep looking in with his fashion sense dude they were his manicured beard yeah i was like dude these guys keep looking at me they want to fight he goes no no they want to fuck you yeah oh well okay well that's better than killing me yeah safer yeah yeah yeah everyone had an ass out there atlanta don't fuck around man that is a fun place yeah so much fun it's um it's one of those cities that uh had one of the best comedy clubs ever in the punchline that's where i performed the well the old one is gone it

156:17doesn't exist anymore i haven't been to the new oh man no that that that club now it's next to a cafe it's it's old as fuck dude super the punchline atlanta yeah it's been this one's been there forever it's next to the it's literally next to a diner small club like when you say been there forever what does that mean how many years fuck dude this place is old but the old one i thought went under i don't know dude but this is the same punchline that jeff foxworthy lives i don't know 20 minutes away from so he'll go there it's basically his comedy store he'll go there and just do sets ron white to do sets there yeah they had all these pictures jeff foxworthy and ron white on the wall in the green room i worked at the other one i worked at the punchline for a wow landmark diner punchline comedy interesting yeah that's it man small little stage right next

157:05to a diner that's open 24 7. well this is definitely different is that different yeah it's definitely different what i mean you've been doing fucking theaters for how long how long ago did you go i want to say the early 2000s weird check how long it's been open jamie but i'm telling you jeff foxworthy goes just pops up runs his shit he's right there yeah it's such a cool club man you know what i'm saying it's like small intimate and you go to the diner afterwards it's so much fun that mall you better have your head on swivel you can get your throat cut or your dick sucked yeah be careful whoa yeah dude or both just the way i dress yeah be careful you gotta be careful the order yeah i didn't you know i didn't know here's the other thing there's a steakhouse called the alley steakhouse one of the best you know i got to eat carnivore so i look for steakhouses right we go

157:50there chapelle lacy which is frowned upon in my world will wear sweats wherever sweats and fucking nice restaurants yeah we go to get in and the guy goes uh-uh not happening and what do you mean he goes didn't you read the dress code out front what the fuck you talking about the guy goes you guys can't eat here and you know she was a black guy i'm like what the fuck are you talking about dude he goes you can't eat here man look at the fucking dress code he goes it's right up front before he walked in i go he goes i'll show you he comes out i'm looking at says like no baggy clothes no backwards hat no fucking jerseys i go dude why don't you say no black people because like don't be like that man we can't have that shit in here we don't have that riffraff in here i'm like dude we just want a fucking steak dude and one security guards goes no i know him he's good

158:33man so they let let us eat in the bar because i'm telling you if you guys want to come here how long you're here i go three days man he goes yeah he can't wear sweats man all right dude one more sweats i'm heated she was like dude it's cool man but then it's right across the street from that mall where they're slitting throats so then i was like oh they don't want that going on here it's not a racist thing because the owner was black they don't want that shit coming over here that's what he's doing super strict the sweatpants thing is a weird thing though right because like girls can basically wear vagina curtains and dudes can't wear sweatpants like what is you don't like the kind of cloth what if i wear mc hammer pants does that count as sweatpants remember those can't touch it remember cavaricis dude here's my manager was in the ufc mc hammer how was that he was cool

159:25had some power is he still doing that i don't think so he made he invested in uh uber and facebook like when it jumped he's stupid rich that's nice yeah he's a great guy that's a good story because the story was always that mc hammer spent all his rap money so i talked to him about that he goes there's a difference there's mc hammer bankrupt and then there's normal bankrupt he's like dude i wasn't broke he's like that's rich as shit but there are certain businesses like donald trump remember when he's running for president i think donald trump made uh he got was bankrupt more than i found this okay moved in 2015 i think oh there you go yeah that's it yeah it's in buckhead that's where that mall is at dude type in uh buckhead mall and you're gonna it's gonna pop up it's notoriously known for gangster shit that sounds like i'm probably won't be visiting yeah don't go there yeah don't go there

160:17the old place was awesome though the old the old punchline was the shit i think like something happened like the land got sold or some shit oh there's dude that that's the thing about doing stand-up like i'm all over dude i get to experience such cool shit man that's why i'm excited about opening the club it's because i used to tell comics all the time hey man you got to be nice to the club owners i go don't think they're the enemy you need them you need them you don't want to do that job you don't want to be a no owner fuck no they don't want to be calm some of them actually did want to be comics that's where it gets nice that gets dicey they put themselves most of them are comedy fans and they they realize a way to work with comics they work with each other i go you know a lot of times like a bad relationship back or forth could be both people's problems and it could be mitigated

161:05by either person's effort you know and then now opening a club my own i'm like wow i'm like i never thought i would ever even want to do that but when i got here i was like well that seems like the right thing to do it seems like the thing to do is to like establish a real home base is it is it more of a take on than you thought no no no good yeah because the the real problem is always um talented people which we have oh yeah and the other problem is uh i mean i'm also talented people to run the club and and and design the club but then the other problem is financial so it's like it seems like i had to do it it's a rare opportunity to be able to do something like that as someone who loves comedy as much as i do agree why wouldn't i do that so i just it was one of the rare moments in my life where i felt like the decision was made for me by the circumstances and just by by fate just by uh legacy

162:01just laying it down that the decision was made for me yeah it was easy for you it was easy it wasn't like i debated it i never thought maybe i shouldn't open a club out here it was like i'm 100 can open up it seems natural yeah and it's like what else would you want to do do you want to it's the same thing we're we're talking about you know the whole thing about whether you would do your special on a network and be subject to their ability to distribute their their whims as far as like what your material is or anything else well that's kind of same thing with a comedy club i mean if you could run your own comedy club and do it optimally and then you you would realize like i don't need anybody else to do this but plus you've been you came up in comedy clubs so you have the experience you know what works what doesn't so there could be a better person when i when i say i don't need anybody i

162:55don't mean like the workers you definitely need those i mean like another business person correct i don't need a like a partner like we could just like get together with all the other people that you need to run a club like great bar managers and great managers and all talent coordinators and just figure it out let's figure it out together yeah and your staff you know who i know very well like you've you surround yourself with guys who they don't miss man they know what exactly what the they're doing they know what they were doing and they know that i know what i'm doing and that i'm committed to this correct and then we're going to have some fun correct and it's a rare it's a rare opportunity to be able to build something completely from scratch what nuts yeah it's nuts i mean i think it'd be you know i love austin i have nothing against austin you know you'd be

163:37successful if you opened this up in albuquerque new mexico yeah but i like it here yeah i'm just saying i like it here too yeah i like it too i feel compelled i felt compelled to come here yeah i think where does that sound no i get it i get it 100 i think when i was thinking about moving out here i just um it's just not my time it didn't feel like you know you felt compelled for me i knew i had more work to do in la like you know you've been in la 30 years how long yeah in la is great man there's nothing wrong with staying there's nothing wrong with being in fucking detroit just do the work put in the work just for me and for guys like tony and dylan and and segura we're like let's get out of here let's get out of here i mean dylan moved back but yeah well tim's here he's got a house here tim out yeah tim dylan has a beautiful house that he just finished and for sure tim has a house

164:29here new york and la but he's crushed he's got several houses for sure he's crushing it well he's smart he actually used to sell houses for a living yeah he knows that there's a real investment opportunity but he's here out out here all the time but the point is it's like when we have a club out here and we have a legitimate home base and we can attract people to come and hang and make it like a fun place and make it something that everybody looks forward to and you actually like look forward to showing everyone your new shit when you come into town and and have it that kind of environment that it's that good oh it's gonna be great man yeah but but also again to these la comics who are like oh austin or austin's oh la the more the merrier man it's the more the merrier like this can be a hub are you kidding me there's another place we can go next place is hawaii next place we start a

165:16comedy community in hawaii 100 dude 100 there's that blue oyster out there in the if or you can do the arena but yeah hawaii'd be fucking lit you'd have to do in honolulu because honolulu has a million people yeah but you could pull it off in honolulu you could pull it off there that's some if somebody went really gangster like if bj pen was a stand-up comic yeah right and what it did open up his own club in honolulu joe coy crushes it out there there's certain comics where they joe coy crushes it at a lot of places everywhere joe coy joe coy is crushing it a lot of places yeah it's a good time for comedy if you turn if it if you just look at the amount of guys that are crushing it right now it's a really good time it's a good time but it's also never been more competitive when you think about it like when you're coming up like if you're on the road let's

166:03say you're in you know where was that as in phoenix well fucking also in phoenix was another comic like there's there's a lot of competition man or the week before was christopher stefano you can think about it that way but there's no way you're ever going to tap into the sheer numbers of people that are out there available and looking for entertainment on a regular night in a city agree if you look at a regular city you know like this is a small city austin has a million people and there's only a million people outside of austin in the general area that's that's two million people and you can see different people every night of the week in this town you could see gary clark jr if he's in town you could see suzanne santo you could see all these artists ellis bullard there's all these like really cool

166:46musicians there's comedy shows all over the place there's plenty of people there's plenty of people a regular comedy club only seats like a big one's 500 people there's fucking thousands of people they're all looking for shit to do it's not hard to have two three shows run at the same time agree you just gotta have good stuff gotta have good so when you say it's competition it kind of is i'm not saying that's a bad thing though no i think that's a positive thing it's uh there's a it's a creative environment and it's always had it with music here you know austin has always been like an amazing music amazing place for live music and still is so but now i think comedy slots right into that and it makes sense and it makes sense that we're detached from the hub of hollywood now like we don't have to be a

167:30part of that like what what what comics are learning from promoting things on the internet whether it's schultz when he did his special online or all these norman did shane gillis released his on youtube all these guys doing them just releasing them online they're realizing like you don't have to do it the way that everybody else used to do it where you're thinking about like oh i don't want to say this because then i won't get a show or oh i want to build up until the point that i can sell my sitcom like that's all gone guys it's gone and the smart guys like we have a close friend i'll say who it is who say it nope he no i won't do that to him it's his story to tell okay i mean i wish i could don't get me wrong well people are gonna guess that's fine but he he got offered a marvel movie he's like dude and when he told me i'm like you turned out a marvel movie he's like you know what

168:15i talk oh yeah he was like i get on there that's my homie yeah yeah it's our homie yeah he can't uh he can't be doing a marvel movie he's smart but i mean the beautiful thing is he doesn't have to either he can turn down stuff you know bro it's and it's important yes it's important to turn down stuff it's important to know like what you actually want to do and how much time you actually have in a day but then there is some guy you know like you look at burt kreischer which i went to his house last week to do his pod dude you know usually because i i text him not even a flex i'm not even trying to brag here i go hey man because where he used to live was dicey yeah hey man i'm coming from the studio i'm in my ferrari you know can i pull into your driveway because you closed the gate you know they're used and he goes oh dude you're good i got a new house i'm like all right dude you

169:04sure is i promise you're good all right let's not blow up his house dude i'm not going to have to piss again what i drank so much water this is a milestone for me i always brag how i have to do this in the show i can't lie i just i have to hold i'm holding it in i'm like i can barely concentrate this is a mental win for this is piss warfare yeah dude i'm tapping twice in a three minute round i gotta piss i'll be right back and we're back yes do a couple piss breaks for you it's good it feels good it's good it gets to that point where i'm like there's no concentrating anymore i'm just all i'm doing is squeezing my dick muscles just which is rare for you because when we're doing the calabasas fight campaign after p i'll go right away i go i'm not joe rogan i gotta take a piss i'm not a fucking weird fucking hairless camel i gotta take a piss it's most of the time i plan it correctly

169:53but the the problem for me is sauna and then rehydration is that and that's what you did this morning that's my thing the sauna it's uh basically daily routine i did a little uh hotel workout man you know i get when you drop a special you have anxiety really bad as i'm getting all of anxiety i know because you just poured more alcohol into a half full glass no but the ice you know the i'm with the flavor dude i'm all about flavor bro the flavor flavor bro that's the flavor we're about to finish that bottle son yeah finished two bottles last night you guys thought it was gonna be bullshit and then everyone starts drinking i'm like no i didn't think it was gonna be bullshit i hoped it wasn't gonna be bullshit but i was the worst when your friend is instantly surprised yeah and and happy that it was good it's it's a very good whiskey it's an interesting

170:40whiskey like i would definitely buy that yeah yeah and for me what's big you know you can get in tex and get at spex that's the big thing spex out here you can get at spex spex is like the local liquor store store in spex in texas but then we just got online with uh bourbon outfitters just took us online so now people is it called bourbon outfitters bourbon uh bourbon outfitters yeah shout to bourbon outfitters that seems like a robbery yeah isn't it great yeah you took your boy on shout out to bourbon outfitters that's that's like that's so weird isn't it yeah but like if you open up like a shoe store called a blevi's yeah there's urban outfitters right yeah but this is bourbon outfitters yeah but uh yeah you can get at thickboy.com and then just click on the link for the tiger whiskey yeah there it is but why tiger why'd you come up with tiger my son's name oh and thick's my

171:31brand right it's for him man i like the eyes yeah there's something about tigers too add tiger to anything it's cool yeah tiger mom you know yeah i didn't think uh tiger was gonna make a comeback you know and then now yeah now he's like he's back popular you know so like oh you did after tiger was i don't care about golf i just want something different i don't there's too many mary's daves and fucking bobs in this world man i want to put some pressure on them yeah but that's a good name to names if if someone's going to be connected to something like that that's a good name yeah tiger yeah i love tiger yeah super bad i can't believe you haven't had him on what does his leg look like he's back it's wrapped in something i saw a video before we started jamie's balls deep in this yeah jimmy was chomping at the bit for this jamie has uh bested his personal

172:18record on the speed of his drive ball speed ball speed big deal dude 180 hey is that really good what's that like it's not bad what's tiger woods like 300 or something yeah no no no no that's 5 000. i think that i don't think uh at the moment tiger could probably he probably would he would say like it would hurt him to try to even hit that hard crank it up have you have you seen this son who swings just like him it's fucking crazy he said it would hurt him to shoot to 180 to swing that hard because it's about swinging hard you know swing hard yeah is that because of his leg yeah his back his back yeah he had a really bad back problem before his leg got up so he still has the back problem so he can't like all the torque's gonna his back up i can't say this enough for people you know there's a lot of people that develop bad backs and develop back problems there are a lot of

173:10exercises to strengthen your back and if you don't have a back problem right now i urge you to take care of your back i urge you if you have access to a reverse hyper machine use it if you have access to a hyper extension machine you use that even deadlift helps you yeah with your back but so there's his leg it's still wrapped up so i'm probably sure it's got scars and do we know why he crashed was he on some medication he just passed out and crashed on the fucking side of the road i don't think there's an official explanation yeah i don't think they said or he the word you know if you have bad backs people are always suspicious that you're taking something for your bad back well he's been known right he got busted before on yeah name a drug if and yeah there was that one time they got pulled over and he was blitzkrieg yeah they say that with him where it went kind of south is he got uh

174:04uh became best friends with jordan and charles barkley and then they were just like dude this is what we do they take pills i i guess just as far as the women what are you saying oh i don't know oh the women yeah you get all crazy about it well that doesn't lead to pills always but pain does back pain back pain is that i think you know if something's squirrely with driving and you know there was that one time that he did get pulled over it was there was a video of it right but yeah there's a video of it and he's blitz in florida there's video of him before the injury of like or pictures i should send out to you where he just falls to his ground his back was hurt so bad like he he would take a swing and he would just drop to the ground wow he would still continue and that's like the way he's playing now people are like you should go you get a cart you can be out there and play

174:50and he's like i'm not going to do that but jamie did you do you hear this so you know he's always trying to show how tough he was to his dad his dad was in the military do you hear about him training with navy seals like straight up navy seals and like doing all the they did and his knees and back up have you heard about this well it certainly could yeah if you're not like proper training if you're not prepared and you don't have the uh musculature to protect your spine and you start doing wild like log lifts and stuff and you could definitely hurt yourself bad you can herniated disc bad on what i'm fortunate man i don't have any you're fit you're fit and you're strong i mean there's there's a thing that you know like you also have a big background in not just football but then in wrestling jujitsu and mma all these things are requiring you to

175:34move your body and keep it strong and then i'm not seeing the workouts and shit you're doing online you keep everything strong the problem with people when it comes to backs is they don't treat the back like it's a specific thing that needs to be like exercised through a tension motion yep you have to like you like when i feel good one of the things that i love to do is i like to i like to smoke a little weed and then stretch okay because when i when i'm when i'm a little high and i stretch it's like a little where everything's tense yeah and i feel it i'm more relaxed well it's i don't know man i just i feel like i have more communication with my tissue like i feel like yeah i feel like i can relax and stretch out more it's like when i'm high and i do yoga it's like the greatest yoga workouts i'd ever have yeah it does sound fantastic i did uh

176:26during the pandemic there's nothing to do i was touring still and i've had every fucking variant you can imagine but um i i got really into dead lifting like heavy lifting like with bradley bradley martin brad at zoo culture bradley martin then my boy mark harley was training me and chapelle and i was like yeah let's see how big i can get dude there's nothing else to do we're locked the down it's only gym open so i just started getting meathead with it i did 425 on the bench i did 225 32 times and then i was like let's see how much i can deadlift like that was always my thing in college at least and uh we did 550 which is pretty easy now you'll put 600 on let's go 600 dude i did 600 and you know luke thomas is like a deadlift aficionado and even when i posted he's like bro be careful man and everyone watching i was like yeah i mean you did that no grip no no ties no chalk

177:19just fucking gorilla style why is he telling you to be careful that you don't fuck up your back there's no need to do it so i did 600 that's not 600 that's bullshit right but uh i did 600 i could feel my back just every fiber go tighten up bro i after i did it you know i did it for the gram whatever 600 all good man i'm telling you i was in my gt2 which is a fucking race car i was driving home my back seized up i had to pull over get out and stretch and i was thinking about something like what are you doing dumb ass right hurting yourself for no reason you know robert over you know robert over the strong man yeah he's been on my podcast before he's a giant like a literal giant he tells people is that the gay guy no no no that's rob kearney oh yeah um that's world's strongest gay shout out to my man yeah um when uh when o burst was on he was telling people

178:16like don't lift heavy with deadlifts and he qualified recently sent me a message um what's heavy to him though well look at the size of him man robert oh yeah i like that guy he's gigantic but he basically said like you could actually strengthen your back by doing like low weights and higher reps but it's like real heavy deadlifting real heavy dead lifting it's dang i'll never do it i'm telling you dude now like me mark harley and chappelle we lift you know basically four times a week together when we're all in la every morning at zoo culture now we'll do time sets of 315 sets of 20 315 we don't go higher than 315 and i'm the most lean strong i've ever been dude even when i was fighting i feel great i'm in better shape now than ever dude that's awesome and really it's all that to be honest like i'm not doing a fraction of cardio i did when i was fighting not even fucking close i'm better

179:09shit just because i'm taking better care of my body my diet's on point just older probably you're doing it for the right reasons too you're doing it just to be healthy versus to get ready for a fight correct yeah like it's like a better i'm also not overdoing it like you know what i'm saying when i was fighting i way over trained just like i do everything i don't do anything heavy at all anymore everything i do is with kettlebells almost everything every now and then i'll pick up pick up like a hex bar and i'll do some hex bar deadlifts and some i'll do uh some some other shit but almost everything i do the heaviest weight i lift is 70 pounds the other thing i'll go heavy on now is is bench and remember i know you talk about bench and hurting your shoulder dude i've been lifting i think this is why i stay injury free knock on wood is because you know since fourth grade i've been in those

179:55fucking gyms man i've been gym since fourth grade and doing yeah you built a base yeah you kept it strong so i'm good i've never taken time off for it so i'll jump on like i'll look at the combine numbers see what they're doing and as tight ends or linebackers i'll go what's the highest and then you know i'll see where i'm at you know i'll knock out 225 easily easily 25 30 easily now that's awesome as long as you don't get injured that's the whole key it's like but the thing about like that whole power lifting weight lifting world is it's gonna get you it's gonna get you if if your technique's not on point right and there's a lot that goes into it you know especially with deadlift but most people it gets you for sure most people especially if you're being a knucklehead that's why so many people get hurt doing crossfit what i really like about kettlebells though is it doesn't seem like

180:42it gets you very often like i can get a really good workout with the heaviest weight i'm lifting is 70 pounds yeah but i'm doing like 70 pound windmills and and gorilla cleans i'm doing all these different things i told you i took a piss before i stared at your dick you look you have a dick on you dude congrats man congrats i was trying to see alex alex jones last night but he fucking shut the door anyways uh you're in fucking shape dude no we're working out a lot you look shredded man keep them with fucking cut off jean shorts what do you got on that they're short though right they're short for you though a little short dude these are regular shorts you some quads on you how dare you these are regular don't lie there's nothing we're nikes now and you didn't wear nike you've changed man i've gone to hollywood what have i got i don't

181:29i told david lucas last night he was like what do you think i was like that's fucking great i was like joe's basically fucking biden like there's fucking security there's black fucking suvs he's a politician it's like hanging out with a politician dude yeah it gets your life has changed man well if you get to a certain level of popularity things do get sketchy they get weird yeah thank god you have the talent to back it up can you imagine if you were like a hack like you couldn't like your hour's shit yeah and then you're doing this huge arena that would be a problem you got to be your same self too though man like you got to be able to be yourself no matter how many people are watching that's what's weird that's when it gets uncomfortable because everybody imagines how you would do it if you were that famous but nobody really

182:11knows you don't know until you get there because it's a unique kind of pressure that unless you've experienced it you're just guessing yeah i but i you know i i'm not just saying this here's my closest friends but you were built for this man there couldn't be a better guy for the gig like good luck pressure good luck i know him dude good luck man like you're built for this dude well there couldn't be a better guy to do this with all this shit anytime there's pressure it's a unique opportunity for you to be able to express yourself uh in a different light you can people can see how you respond and like what your real feelings are to all kinds of things and also you get to look at your accusers too meaning like if you know who a person is and then you know that someone is misrepresenting them intentionally yeah in the media like you would cnn or whatever it is you you look at them and you go

183:00what do they really like like who are these people that are running this what kind of weird petty woke people yeah why are they doing this they're doing this yeah and what kind of delusional perspective on reality do they have where they think this is going to work because it does the opposite of work correct yeah especially with your situation i i woke up this and i don't know i used to get older and you know running business and be careful what you ask for with thick boy studios you have employees and you have boss you know yeah boss now like there's a lot that goes into it dude yeah i'm a what yeah i gotta run this fucking thing so it's like you're putting out a million fires and then i you know i just did i guess because i'm old i have kids like my anxiety is through the roof man like i woke up this morning

183:43because my special you know even with the tough mutters and everything and anxieties through the roof you wouldn't believe it dude well you're doing something difficult you know when when things are difficult and there's a lot of unknown a lot of unknowns factor in when you're doing things that are difficult and that is you know especially when you're a father and you're a provider and you have a career and it's kind of a crazy career that you patch together yeah once you are already a professional athlete and then all of a sudden you're doing this podcasting thing yeah you know it's it's natural to have anxiety but i you know meditation is probably a good option for you like find some time during the day and sit alone and just think about your breathing that's what i did this morning before i came here

184:24you know good yeah it's one of the things i love the most about yoga is that yoga forces you to just think about your own bullshit while you're going through all these crazy poses and trying to hold especially hot yoga it's fucking tough dude it's so challenging and then if you can just fight that you know inner demons like dude let's get the fuck out of it's 120 degrees you're on this stupid pose it's like no no no no yeah it's um it's uniquely challenging it really is but it's also like uniquely ancient right like people figured out a long time ago that's really good for you oh a long time ago yeah and pun intended i don't like to advocate drugs for everything but for for yoga marijuana and yoga are like long lost lovers like they don't even know they don't even know well that's like whiskey and you get them together yeah but if you get marijuana and yoga together

185:21i'm telling you it's like they don't they're like oh my god it's a tango dude together together we're one peanut butter and jelly daddy marijuana like when i was talking about how i like stretching when i'm when i'm high when that's that's just like static you know it's on it's just static you're just pulling tissue apart and you're getting a feel for things but when you're actually going through poses and holding poses and concentrating on breathing and just concentrating on your balance you're dripping sweat there's something about marijuana that makes that magical it makes it like getting high and going to yoga is one of the most transcendent transcendent experiences a person can have in a normal city without like completely losing their fucking mind you can change your perspective and if you do it a lot

186:06if you do it on a regular basis you can change the way you think about everything have you gotten to shrooms at all oh yes micro micro dosing shrooms i was doing a lot of shrooms when i got canceled when i got canceled like from the time i got why all that because i wanted to see let's see what happens let's throw some mushrooms at it oh and did it make it better yeah i was i was so much more relaxed and how much when all the cancer also being canceled hilarious but you know no one's canceling you but when all that storm was coming i mean i would talk to you yeah you were fine you just didn't just stay out pay attention to it yeah just don't how'd you deal with it deal with yourself um do other things that are also difficult with me a lot of it is always my workouts are always crazy difficult yes and then sauna sessions and cold plunge sessions and all this different shit that i always do anyway

186:56and then you know let it pass over yeah i think i woke up this morning with anxiety and i did a workout and then uh drank some whiskey and then did my nicotine and i did a job on so many so much shit that stuff is so nasty i don't know why you keep that in your mouth bro what are you talking about jamie and i bailed you guys are bitches how long did you keep it in your mouth for 10 seconds before you 10 seconds that's not no no just before him by means come on what are we doing here so do you still have it in there oh of course i'll go through a can a day dude i'm obsessed with it and this is berry the mango and the lemon fire the cinnamon let me try one more time yeah there we go that's the spirit dude yeah but i woke up this morning with anxiety i popped i'm gonna prepare myself i did four i do i do four at a time i did four rogues at a time a little whiskey four at a time

187:43that's insane that's insane i'm doing one it's foul yeah all right here we go yeah let's do this it doesn't taste bad it's the it's like strong yeah what are we doing if you're gonna do it do it it's the tingle yeah you can do it do it what are we doing yeah dude you do these on stage don't you no i take them out for stage i don't want to be a distraction i do it right before but yeah dude i struggle with english as it is right i don't need that to fucking liability delicious now you you you might leave here and try some others yeah there's nothing as tasty as this that's why i fuck with these what is it what's rogue dude guarantee you never find anything better you're gonna do all these other ones i was good for about 45 seconds earlier this product contains nicotine nicotine is an addictive chemical they're not lying because your boy goes through a can a day i like cigars

188:35i'm a fan of the scars yeah but i woke up this morning and maybe it adds my uh anxiety i do four of those at a time i do seven seven shots of espresso that's not good either so yeah just hear me out of seven shots of espresso that had some whiskey what kind of lumber yard shit that many of these roads and seven shots of espresso you must be like one of those fucking trucks that trips over into a river and just unloads logs you want to hear my process hey kids my process of stand-up so i do that and then i only eat red meat my cholesterol and blood pressure through the roof but uh and then i did a work i did a workout and then i was like uh and again i think it through my years of sports and at a high level and i was like you've done your best man now just there's nothing i can do you've done your very best this is the best i have dude we've done everything we can

189:35the promotion the marketing side of it now it's not on me and i i just felt like this freedom a little bit but now the anxiety's back but for a hot second the the anxiety was gone you just got to get through it and then this is going to be an awesome little uh milestone for you to show how much better you got from the first one show that you're working show yeah and one thing is really important to note is that anytime you watch anyone do stand up on a video that is maybe at its best 60 to 70 percent of what it's like to experience that live correct live is so much better for stand-up i mean if you think about like uh bring the pain excuse me bring the pain or bigger and blacker two of chris rock's earlier masterpieces can you imagine what it would be like to be there in that audience live while he was filming that and just slaying bro you remember when martin lawrence was martin

190:32lawrence i used to have to follow him i've told i've told you about that he i used to have to follow him in the 90s i used to eat dick when he was martin lawrence when he was wearing leather jumpsuits bro i used to have to follow him sweating his ass up and i wasn't that good i mean i just was not ready to be following him it wasn't it was just one of those mitzi shore things mitzi shore knew how to test you as a comic and with me it's like if anyone big from out of town any major headliner any movie star and they're doing stand-up i'm going on after them i think that's i think that's the athlete in us i think that's the competitive athlete advantage we have is doing stand-up i'm the exact same way but mitzi made me do it sure i'm telling you even if she didn't make you do it i bet you would do it

191:17knowing you i bet you your dna you would rise to the occasion whether it went good or bad you'd want that for yourself because you know from with training partners when i was going through camp whether it's cro-cop gonzaga mitrione lavar johnson whoever the fuck is ben rothwell i would i wouldn't shy away from the toughest challenge because i knew that would make me better right so with stand-up it's like yeah let me go after rogan or delia or theo or joey diaz i know like yeah it might not go great for me but i know it's that's how you're gonna grow that's how i'm gonna grow as a comic same thing the other night with louis ck you look at the lineup and david lucas followed him yeah and david david lucas love him to fucking death he's the best but you know he's always on his phone he didn't realize he was following louis ck and he's back you know all the comics are watching

192:05me still on his phone you know whatever the fuck he does and he goes oh shit i'm next it hit him like five minutes for me to go on he goes oh shit i'm next oh yeah dude by design because you're gonna you louis dark and dirty you're dark and dirty but you fucking you're a machine gun dude so if you just fire off from the jump that's what you're gonna do he's gonna warm him up crush you're gonna follow that dude and he had just such a like a breakthrough i'm telling you man and me and david have never hugged before he came in the back of the green room we embraced like you won the fucking super bowl that's awesome i grabbed his big ass and he's lost weight too man has he yeah he he talked about that last night about uh that that set how a big of a set it was for a young comic to have to follow a guy like louis that's a big deal you know breakthrough yeah and it's also

192:53like the louis that you're experiencing now is like the louis that had everything taken away from him and now he's back to what he really is which is just a really funny really talented comic like all of his craziness in the past is you know put it aside like what you're getting when you watch him on stage is a really really talented stand up who's only focused on that not doing other stuff there's only three guys that uh four i'd say five who knows but guy as far as like just at as the craft you know if you're watching football it's tom brady watching basketball it's fucking lebron or you know whoever in stand up it's like yeah you want to see a guy like yeah it's like you louis joey diaz you know uh chris rock's brother what's his name tony tony tony rock's a murderer bro murder dude i know a lot of people give him his credit i've never seen anybody crush harder in the main room

193:46that's a comic store tony rock tony rock dude is the guy that has the opposite uh thing there's a whole a whole thing where if you say that oh you're chris rock's brother oh you got an easy road to comedy it's the opposite bro tony rock should be way more famous than he is i think one of the things that held tony rock back is that he's chris rock's brother correct when your brother's one of the greatest of all time tough people don't realize how good he is as far as a writer goes top of the food chain dude top of the food chain stand up a monster yeah monster dude i'm done in the main room i went on right before him i got off i watched from the back i'm like i want to see chris i i'm uh i apologize for this i was like oh i want to see chris rock's brother i'll see what he has you know hopefully he's good it's chris rock's fucking brother yeah dude i've never you know

194:37i've been around the comics as a fucking fan as a comic i've seen some sets man i've never seen anybody including joey diaz who brings a house down i've never seen anybody than tony rock it was a sarah mellow show on a fucking tuesday night crush harder in my life there's levels man there's like there's a certain level that you can't achieve like you can't get past like a certain there's a certain level yeah you got a you got a ceiling dude yeah and i watched them went holy fuck there's certain guys yeah yeah sometimes i'll watch neil brennan the way he writes britney schmidt the way that she writes you know you you look at it like holy fuck dude well that's the beauty of being surrounded by talented people so you do get to see all these different ways of doing it i just really think that it's important that we respect this thing

195:27as an art form because it's kind of like loosely connected to any structure everybody's just running around doing their old thing doing shows and one of the things that i was thinking about with this club is that i just want everybody to know that there's something value about the valuable about looking at this as an art form and looking at this as like this should be studied and there's there's there's a lot of information that we could pass on to each other and there's a lot of information that we could pass on to people in the future because it's not as documented in terms of like the way it's loved it's not nearly as documented as a lot of the other art forms that are loved it's not and because it's more complicated to achieve success at there's maybe maybe a thousand comedians on earth worth a fuck i think even a thousand no i don't 100 but maybe let's just get crazy and say

196:18maybe there's a bunch of people that i don't know about yeah how many authors are there oh i know there's a lot more musicians how many musicians how many doctors how many actors yeah there's a lot more it is a weird strange road and one of the most difficult roads in all of show business to achieve success through it's strange road and i don't think it's been documented enough i don't think we've spent enough time talking about it like amongst each other and in a way that is like like where a young person coming up can watch like a whole series of conversations that just pertain to the development of your act the life of your career how things emerged how it started where you went wrong where you went right what changed things for the better but now the material's out there man it's all documented

197:02like someone could put it together you've had enough on you tapping out like tapped out how long did i have it in there four deep minutes daddy four deep shout out to rogue i gotta eat the out of here let's run this down um my brother i love you congratulations on your special thank you man um tell everybody it's on youtube thick boy thick boy youtube is where it's at it's the gringo poppy if you use the hashtag the gringo poppy um and you post you know whatever you're watching it we're gonna blast that out and then uh our favorite uh viewing party picture on instagram using the hashtag the gringo poppy you get a signed bottle of tiger thick and a signed poster of the gringo poppy the official poster when is it out it's out today today thursday morning 9 a.m it dropped on youtube thick boy youtube there it is

197:45dude we're at 70 000 five hours so we're doing the goddamn thing dude beautiful not bad shot in dallas if you want the whiskey go to thickboy.com you'll see it there shout out to bourbon outfitters they're the one who were supplying it but i love you man i love you charlotte next week may 5th through the 7th where's your comedy dates what's your best uh website uh thickboy.com or f-a-t-f-a-t-k-z.com and everything's on thick boy food truck diaries shop show beautiful king sting in the wing keep hustling keep hustling brendan schaub i love it can't stop won't stop love you everybody the gringo poppy