Andrew Santino

00:04three why Cheeto Santino why that uh I'll tell you when I first moved to Los Angeles um I was playing this basketball league with these kids from East LA it was like the only connection I had in LA with these like couple of kids that I knew from Long Beach and uh we would go play ball in this league and then afterwards we'd go to a bar and just get shitfaced like just blacked out out of our mind 22 like every dime we had was going to booze and partying so we were partying and I'm wearing basketball shorts like white people do when you play basketball and all my Mexican friends you know they wear like whatever they had on the floor that morning it was like jeans and you know what there was never basketball shoes for them and we're sitting there drinking and this dude Pavo his buddy of mine he looks down at my legs and he goes dog I got to ask you a question player like

00:48did you have orange leg hairs dog I was like dude I've known you for years you've never seen that he's like no dog it's so gross dog it's nasty to look at bro it's kind of like if you ate a bag of Cheetos and you wipe the finger dust all over your legs and she you got Cheeto legs dog so the Cheeto thing so then all these dudes all these all these homies were always like Cheeto it was just a it just stuck so hard that when I got Twitter and Instagram I was like I have to have Cheeto as my like I have to embrace the Cheeto embracing the cheet embra the Cheeto man wow yeah this is a good time for orange-haired comedians the two of the greatest of all time have orange hair it's it's wild because uh I've always been such a massive massive fan of Burr I mean I can't preach him enough I think I I think I do it I I dick ride him so hard I think many people I talk

01:35to are like all right dude enough like I get it you like him but I do man I I I've always loved him and and Louis has changed the game in a totally different way um they're both the of all time shocking Burr right now is he's doing something real special and he's also a man's man an Unapologetic man dude thank god oh there's so few it's such a hard time to be a guy yeah you're not allowed to if you say that if you say that people like it's so hard to be a man with all your male privilege oh CIS Jenner mes complaining about how hard it is being judged folks being judged harshly white straight male I'm the literal enemy Public Enemy Number One right now yeah I walk around you are the enemy you're automatically a rapist and a misogynist and an egomaniacal money hungry driven bad human being it's so it's so up this is how ridiculous it's gotten there was an article oh they're still

02:32complaining about being a man there was an article that I just read that was advocating that women should never go to prison it was like let's stop putting women in prison yeah see if you could find that it was the idea was that women are suppressed and they already represent such a significantly small portion of the US population that really so therefore heinous crimes don't then they don't deserve deserve the same punishment as other people that have heinous crime heinous crime the the number of women hit men would just go through the roof right people if they couldn't be arrested yeah oh my God so much so so so much domestic well that's like saying okay so if you're if that's what that if that's what the article is trying to say then then say any other repress group in society then then minorities can't go to prison anymore that's the same logic they represent a much larger percentage

03:22though so the thing there she's saying about women is there's so few women in prison already and women are like a lot of their behavior is due to fact they've been suppressed by men okay oh my god well it's just the idea of us being on two teams is so crazy the penis team and the vagina team like it's that simple shirts and skins it's that simple like you're all the all people on your side are good all people on our side are bad do you know how crazy that is that's insane that well that's what I said like um not to sound like I'm plugging my special but in my special I I talk about I was shot at in Chicago where I'm from and at the time there was a lot going on in Chicago as there always is a lot of shootings and I think there's a big up there's an immediate uproar of like cops and I hate that cuz I have cops in my family and you can't just blanket statement an

04:09entire thing just like you can't blanket an entire race of people sex class of people and say you're all the same that's the same thing as saying like every cop is a bad person like are you out of your mind could agree more there's millions of police officers that are great people you happen to hear stories about bad humans that happens in any industry right and and honestly if you look at it statistically like the number of bad cops versus the number of cops and then you have to break down the number of interactions cops have with people it's stunning have have you met people they're awful people are awful can you imagine every day to you but imagine how awful they are if you are a professional enemy and they know that you're just a person just like them so you're pulling this guy over this guy's done a crime you know he's going to lie to you you're and

04:52you're the enemy and you don't even know this guy you don't even know him you don't even have a real beef with him but his whole life is on the line right now in this altercation you never know if he's going to shoot you you never you never know there's so many videos online there's the most one of the most terrifying videos of this cop pulling this guy over and the guy was some Vietnam veteran who's a a real killer and he wind up killing the cop and they show him killing the cop on the security camera the guy's trying to give this guy all the all the room in the world like sir please get back in your car sir please get back start sir put your hands down sir sir Put the gun down sir and then it gets to the I mean's he's trying so hard not to be a and this guy shoots him and kills him and you're telling me that other cops haven't seen that video you don't think

05:38that they're terrified that they're going to be the next guy that's on some YouTube clip that two Comics are talking about on a podcast cuz it could happen every time you pull a guy over your life's on the line and the stress of that is ungodly and we expect them to manage it like robots we expect them to be like no person we've ever met where they just no problem no stress if you you're a accountant what is the worst that can happen to you once you're in the office the printer breaks almost almost nothing is life-threatening no Microsoft Excel crashed this morning everyone's going crazy in accounting If You're A Beat cop Jesus Christ well it's the same way with uh you know I know this is this is all this has been said but the way we treat veterans and it's like you know I grew up with a kid who was a really close friend of mine that killed himself a couple years ago was a veteran

06:26and I think the expectation of the return to nor see is not only ridiculous and in an insane request but it's just so illogical that that's a that's not approach it's like dude these people can't come back from any sort of combat and and just be pushed back into the real world like well you're good right you're good did we did you turn off the switch when you landed back in the United States yeah man it was just a little toggle in my head and then I'm good now I should go get a regular job I guess yeah and the just the lack of responsibility that we have for like taking care of those people czy the lack of uh emphasis on psychological recovery on giving them coping skills mental health man that's the biggest issue in the United States I say that all the time it's like there's so much lack of help for mental health dude you see it so constantly in so many different

07:14facets now I think it's coming out more because of the internet because you see you know violent crimes and and and you see where mental health has kind of LED our country now there should be a bigger focus on it dude I had a psychiatrist in the podcast yesterday Kelly Brogan who uh uh had she wrote a book called what is it called a mind of your own a mind of your own is the name of her book we talked all about these psychiatric drugs and when they prescribe them and why they prescribe and what are the side effects and how easily they prescribe them and how so many of these same exact symptoms can be cured by exercise and diet and they don't even Advocate that right and she's talking about like how incredible it is like her coming from a background of Psychiatry being an MD going through the whole training thing writing a book about it and you realize like oh my God

07:59just doping people up yep cuz it's easy fix man they want short-term short-term solution as fast as you can working out an exercise sounds like such a it sounds like a marathon yeah and they just they're like give me the give me the 40 yard dash like what can we do to get them in the 40 yard dash and they're like here take this pill and that's that changes everything just the disassociative quality of these pills are so dangerous and we just hand them out not we obviously you and I aren't involved but someone's out there as far as the audience knows we don't do it imagine imagine if you're a guy right now worker for a pharmacist company and every day you read the news you see some Mass killing goes please don't let them be on our please don't let them be every day it's like rolling the dice online hoping it wasn't some guy on one of their drugs she was talking about

08:43how the numbers of people that commit these mass killings that are on drugs they're on psycho psychoactive some sort of psycho pharmaceutical drugs she's like it's crazy it's like 100% yeah well let me give let me let me give you something this is how powerful that world is I probably shouldn't say this but I'm with you so so I don't really give a but on the only one thing I wasn't allowed to talk about or not talk about but specifically say on my Showtime special was about Accutane I went on Accutane when I was a kid do you know this drug do you know ACC sit drug yeah it is but it's unbelievably unstable okay it's caused a lot of suicide people got real up from it so it caused a lot of chemical and mental reaction that they didn't anticipate for youth youthful you know kids under 18 with underdeveloped brains used to have a sign a form to say I can

09:30die from this medication there's a risk of death that was a real thing for pimple medication but on the special show times lawyers called us and said I can mention the company but I can't say the joke uh I said if you don't know what Accutane was it was developed in the 80s and the 90s to kill acne and then people and they they were like we can't say that I was like why can't I say that's a that's a fact and the guys you know the lawyers were like they're a massive sponsor Jesus Christ that was the that was the control they were like of all I thought Showtime didn't have any sponsors how CBS CBS is their Mothership it's Viacom right right yeah that was the only thing that they were like we just can't say that which I respectively removed cuz I was like I didn't need that piece anyway but I was like that's so weird that they are that meticulous about this one small

10:18thing because they wanted to cover up the fact that people people used to die from it people wanted kids who are who are the most insecure point of your life you got all over your face and you just just want to fix it with a pill cuz you want to feel better about your life you're already so vulnerable and ugly and weird and they're willing to risk their life for it but this company won't recognize that that was a thing what what numbers of people died off of it I mean there was at one point I I remember when I was in high school there was like three kids it it made national news because it was like three kids in a row committed suicide it was like consecutive like three young kids boom bo boom that committed suicide and of course you can't just attribute it to one thing I'm not saying you can point a finger and say that's what it was but there's enough evidence surrounding

11:01things like that that made the company put more legal action behind uh release forms for when you take the drug uh nowadays I think it's I think there's different levels of it you can't give to people under under 16 or a certain age because of the strength of the medication Jesus yeah because all I wanted to do was not be ugly anymore so what did it do to you you know what's funny man it cleared my skin up and I never had to take it ever again I know people that did it two or three times and uh it it gave me a lot of Joy cuz I felt fine again I had so I had such bad acne I say I had such bad acne when I was a kid that I it made me not believe in God I was like no nothing exists I'm alone on this Earth and I was I felt like I was the ugliest person to ever walk the planet cuz you felt so so this thing it it it fixed me so to speak it made me feel like everything was good

11:52again which is so gross but that's how like shallow we are as kids cuz you're just like so vulnerable around your peers you're like just want to be I just want to be normal when you're like 16 years old if you have a horrible acne attack it your head up you feel so weak yeah like you're so at the mercy of this I mean obviously oh poor white cisgendered man worried about Z no you know what I understand there's worse problems look at that there what is this this is a a list of the side effects of this stuff miscarriages miscarriages birth defs increased internal skull pressure bone mineral density depression psychosis suicide aggressive or violent behaviors AC acute pancreitis unknown in quotes cardiovascular consequences deafness hepatitis bowel disease excessive bone growth night blindness and sight loss you can just lose your vision well then you know you

12:47lose your vision you can't see your acne anymore so I guess that's kind of the C look at the list of birth effects scroll back down again please look at this part where it says the the list of birth effects no up up a little up a little up a little there you go genetic name in facial and nerve system deformities mental retardations patience must be on birth control when using it yep because you get miscarriages are you out of your mind is that crazy patients must be on birth control if you want to use this medication you can't get pregnant your baby will come out of mutant a jersey man with 25 million verdict after you alleged that Ro the acne drug attain gave inflammatory B disorder that required the removal of his colon they to R his oh my God Jesus Christ you only get 25 million if they take out your colon that's it dude you lose your butt you get 25 you get one payday from

13:39The Rock like one of his big movies they take your colon maybe he might get more than that he might get more than that for like Baywatch that's what they write in the in the memo of the check for colon man for colon for anus so um I worked at a a a hamburger place a place called Newport creery when was in high school and uh I got graduated from dishwasher to working at the grill that's a big deal it was a big deal but the problem was working at the grill you get crazy zits dude cuz it's just grease in your face all day like literally you get out of there your face is covered in grease what how old were you 15 I guess I was 16 when I started working there 15 or 16 somewhere there my first job was McDonald's so of course I was really aiding in the face of my life I was like let me eat food uh be around grease all day all day oh all day long those fril lators like that

14:33shit's in the air man like you have a thin film of it on your face leave yeah and my zits got out of control and I remember there's this girl this really cute girl that worked there and she grabbed my face once like she's just just being nice to me she goes you're so cute she grabbed my face and all I could think of is oh my God she just touched my zits I'm so disgusting I think about it to this day it's crazy it's crazy and it sticks with you dude dude it was was so devastating at the time I just like I'm like cuz I was attracted to her she's very cute but I always felt like she was out of my league and then she's all of a sudden she's touching my face I'm like godamn she got my zits I I remember we were going to like a uh a family function of some kind and I had obviously just picked at something on my stupid face and my little brat sister was like you're

15:21bleeding like out of my face I was like I'm a mutant you feel like you're like blanket me and hiding me in the back of the car the only thing what what changed it for me was exercise yeah yeah once I started um I started like really heavily working out it kind of went away like towards like 17 and 18 by the time I was 18 it it stopped but man from 15 and 16 it was bad well I played Sports all through high school so that was an issue cuz it was always sweating and it was making it exacerbated it made it worse and then in college all I did was work out and didn't play a lot of Active Sports so by that time it was all cleared up and I was fine but in school was just like I did everything to make it worse like everything possible everybody would get a sunburn to kill their zits remember that yeah well look at me your sits in the sun I just would get I would get cancer and get worse

16:10skin that's a like in the summertime I remember that was like a like oh boy it's going to be sunny out this is great I can cook off some of these zits got to Sun off these zits yeah man I I had a buddy of mine growing up I mean I cannot complain cuz my buddy um had it real bad yeah he was one of those guys that was like his his everything his neck was covered in pock marks his face was covered in po marks and the poor kid was like barely hanging on right he's like 15 16 years old you know wasn't like genetically gifted to begin with and then all a sudden he gets hit with this hail storm on his face I mean his whole all of his skin was just and there's nothing they can do about it once that happens no unless you want to lose your colon unless you want to take a pill it's not even that it doesn't smooth your face out the only way they can smooth your face out once

17:02you have those scars all over the place is they have to sand blast you yeah surgery yeah it's crazy and it doesn't look good uhuh no no you can tell it's yeah no I I like I'm I'm lucky that that that it worked cuz I had friends who work didn't work and it was like oh God that's just so if you were my friend who just got hit with the the hail storm like you would think like maybe for that guy I'd be worth taking a chance at suicide yeah why not so crazy if you're going to do it cool you know you never know you never know right you just rolling the dice you might be that one of that one out of a thousand people that goes completely insane once that stuff hits your system goes blind insane shits yourself skull pressure was the craziest thing bone growth weird bones are going to start get to grow horns you see Mike's second chin you just have another chin start to grow below you

17:51ever go to this lady um uh Dr pimple popper on Instagram no oh my god did she just pop I'm addicted to this lady's Instagram page the point where it almost seems like she's sponsoring the show I go I tell everybody about her you go to her page and every day she's cutting open cysts and popping zits and dude you can she's got millions of look at she's got 2.4 million okay 2.4 million humans watch this all all the time constantly dude I watch it but uh all of her stuff is um these giant Z go to that lower right hand corner one show this click on that look at this she's just cutting open these cysts and it's so oddly addictive man when you she's got like this little circular razor blade tool it takes like a circular chunk of meat out of your neck so that she can now push all the P out my God isn't this insane like people's bodies making me making and these errors these like skin errors that

18:56we have like how many of those do we have inside oursel you know like when people you hear about people having cysts and liver cysts and like that inside of you like this dude I have I have a cyst uh when I was in when Jesus when I was in college I can't look away it's insane I know that's what I'm saying I'm in the sunken Place dude I can't look away at this yeah it's it's very interesting when I was in college dude I thought I had nut cancer I thought I had testicle cancer and I went into a doctor this is insane I went into a campus doctor and he feels around in my nuts and he feels the bump and I'm dude I cried for like two days yeah I started sucking my and he was like I'm going to get that nut I'm GNA get that nut there's only one way to get it out he said to me this is no he goes it's a buildup of seen a doctor said that and I was like really

19:47he goes do you have a hot tub I was like there's one in my complex cook your he goes go in there and jerk off in the hot tub he told you to jerk off in the hot Tu SAR to God he tell you what time at 10:01 and I don't want you to look up he said he said military time actually yeah he said he said at 2022 I want you to come exra crazy military time if you're talking about a guy jerking off and you're telling them how to do it during military time 2022 I want to watch no dude this guy said it was a I'm not kidding he said it was a buildup of cement my dad flew into town cuz he was concerned cuz I was like dude it freaked me out I was like I have this thing on my nut we went to the best doctor we could find and the guy was like I should have this other dude like get his medical license removed he's like this is buildup of seen is completely incorrect this is a

20:33cyst on your testicle it's not he's like it's benign it's you're fine but the fact that that someone on Camp like a campus doctor told you that that's a real Medical Professional he was probably high out of his mind baked out of his I went to Arizona State so he was lost yeah it was just a dude they found that morning at the bus stop that doesn't even make sense to me and I'm I I don't have no medical training when he said it I was like there's no chance send in video that's what it was he's like take a video of it that's what I want you to do I want you to take your nuts and hold them over a lamp so I could see through your nuts and then take as many pictures as you can no filter I'm going to bring in a couple other boys in here young boys use filters have you seen that have you seen that movie tickled have you seen that documentary tickled I have not but it

21:17keeps getting recommended to me I'm going to have to watch it BR it's unreal it blows your mind how these guys were tricked into this it's as simple as young actors being like you got to you got to just make a living can can you let another guy tickle you on the internet for 5 minutes for $100 and these young kids were like dude I've had friends get hit on by guys during casting sessions like just all just straightforward like if you want to yeah like I've had friends like literally get propositioned I've had a few friends get propositioned by some very F very famous yeah very famous people that are like you come to so and so's house no one will know no one will say anything but as a in in the public eye people think they're straight that's such a leap man when you're a dude and you're straight and you're like all right how much money is that really like that is that is the crazy

22:07leap like I honestly absolutely firmly believe that prostitution should be legal 100% it doesn't make any sense you can decide to someone for free and we all agree that nobody got hurt but if some for some reason there's something wrong with like someone paying you to jerk them off yeah why what what's cares do you imagine do you imagine if Tiger Woods if Tiger Woods could have had prostitutes this would have never gotten exposed do you think if that if prostitution was legal and it was kind of not a faux Paw Thing in society do you think he would have never had this moment of collapse in his career I think it would change the way we look at sex if prostitution was legal like now right like it's it's so illegal and it's been illegal for so long that if someone male or female has someone pay them for sex you're a right it's a label but we know for a fact that there's gold

23:01diggers like gold diggers are real but they're not but they're not even hidden they're blatant blatant yeah they just say it right I mean the internet you've seen that have you ever seen that Instagram post where the there's these really hot like Instagram models and then it shows a picture in the next box of a bunch of guys that are like in their 60s with giant guts with gray hair on their guts it's like those Instagram models in Dubai this is who's paying for those trips yeah of course like we know those people exist there's nothing wrong we don't care it's like look at her she got it good for her that like that Dan Bilzerian guy you know him that's like his that's hiso well sort of he's a good-looking guy too yeah but these women that are around they he knows what they're around for and she they know what they're around for it's a it's a Mutual de it's a deal I think

23:43the best example of it was Jay Howard Marshall and Anna Nicole Smith totally and Anna Nicole Smith married that 90-year-old dude who was in a wheelchair and she and she was just she was just giant titties and big ass just out there brilliant it was amazing it was amazing cuz it was so blatant I had a whole bit about it in my ACT there it is right there she set the tone that's setting the tone that's the that's the gold standard of gold diggers right and that's I mean come on and he's marrying her there how is that not prostitution that's one of the funniest things go back to that photo zoom in on his face look at how unhappy he looks it's remarkable this guy's so old he can't formulate a smile when he's marrying a woman a quarter his age and I think at the time she was a lesbian so she was just eating and hanging out with him and she had to do like marital relations with him and when she

24:33would do the marital relations with him you know she would like time to go to work what does she what do she got to do he can't what do she got to do just suck his dick just suck him exclusive maybe did they have Viagra back then no I don't think so I think they did I think we came up with the the timeline for Viagra maybe they came up with it for him it was all his research money there's got to be a way I'm back close to marrying and a Nicole Smith you piece of make something keep my dick hard for an hour and a half I've got 10 billion doll and not a lot of time I don't want you to listen to me you son of a so crazy I love it good for him look at you like my body yeah go out with a bang or at least attempt an attempt at a bangang is he dead yeah he's dead as what he die of Happiness died of being old Joy he died of Joy the world blessed him in his final years but that's legal it's

25:33totally legal to marry someone and have sex with them for money as long as you marry them and then get to steal all their money it's like a small transaction like if he could just pay her y like for Jay Howard Marshall a multi-billionaire type character I bet 100 Grand is not out of the question it's nothing one one evening for 100 grand it seems like a worthy proposition here's this is this if he's a bill this is someone told me this recently we were talking about this this is amazing the difference between aill in a billion because I think in America we just kind of like we don't even think about it you know you just hear it you're like billionaire oh he must be a billionaire you know I'm sure someone Joe Rog got to be a billionaire dude here's the difference if people don't realize a million seconds is is how many days would you guess a million seconds I've

26:14done this before and I always forget it do you know a million second million second 30 days that's a great guess okay it's 11 days that's good most people are way off so it's 11 days yeah that's good a million seconds is 11 days how 20 days is a billion seconds how many 31 years Jesus 11 days to 31 years Jesus look at that so when trillion seconds is 31,000 years when someone tries to say like they understand what a billion is you're like you have no idea what a billion is a billion is so beyond far away now as far as it's been explained to me and I've never researched this at all so I wonder if you could find this out someone said to me that when you look at the richest men in the world like they look at like Warren Buffett and Bill Gates and all those billionaire characters that they're not really the richest men in the world that the real richest men in the world are these Saudi

27:10guys and a lot of these oil guys but they're they're monarchs and they they don't have to disclose their wealth they never do it's not like they're the CEO of a corporation they're they're head of a royal family they owe no government any indication of what their earnings are so so this dude who knows one of those cats was telling me that he's probably a trillionaire me and I was like what I go that's real and he goes yeah I got I didn't know there was trillionaires he goes it's very likely this guy might have access to a trillion dollars cuz the only thing that we know is our famous billionaires we're infatuated with our billionaires that we kind of have as these social icons you know like the Zuckerberg and these guys that are like they did something that we can recognize these Saudi families that have had that money have had that money for a long time it's not new money this is old

27:58they had they had hundreds of millions 50 years ago right so now it's only accumulated into billions of I mean they own well what what the um that guy the the Chinese billionaire that um what was his name he just bought uh the basat oh we had Japanese Japanese for1 million just we just we're talking about that what show is that it was Bill Burr yeah dude 110 I think it was I mean and he owns another one that he got for like 57 but that 57 is nothing to him that's like it's a flick guy's insane who's this cat we're at 1.4 trillion dollars oh my God see oh my God the royal family is worth a staggering 1.4 trillion Solomon bin abdulaziz pictured is the current King dude that's Balling on a whole new level son that's just new 1.4 trillion oh my God who is this guy the the rosch yeah for sure there's probably a bunch of those little Scoundrels running around taking a piece of that pie but

29:06that's a so a billion is a thousand million yep thousand Milli to 700 trillion the Rothchilds estimated between 1 billion and 700 trillion hey how about you do a better job I could I could do as good a job of estimating is that no that's number probably a kazillion it's like when Ask a kid how much a car is and they're like8 $8 and you're like yeah it's like $8 that's how much cars are $8 $100 ex it is a Mercedes son how the could they have such terrible like Gap in their their guesstimate well that's got to be that see those kind of old families that have been around for that long you know that they hide money they don't like when they say x amount of dollars it's because that's what they've been told through so many sources I used to know that you know the guy this guy George Soros do you know who that is the guy who broke the B of Manhattan I know the

30:00name because everyone brings it up when they talk about like anyone on the right side like Alex Jones said that George Soros is making the marijuana stronger he's doing it for mind control I take it once a year I smoke marijuana to test the efficiency I like how he's the Gage I'm going to do it for America I will smoke he says he smokes it once a year he said that during his custody trial that's it once that's it just once a year to test test it potency that's George Soros George Soros 86 I part with his one time 252 billion I part with this kid one time at one of these Hollywood things and I've never seen someone so and I'm not going to say anything negative about him and I've just never seen that kind of money firsthand I've never i' never known a billionaire I've never been friends with a billionaire and this kid was so Lucid it was almost as if he's not living now

30:49at all he's just kind of go it's just Flo he's so floating it's like whatever happens happens I said where are you staying while you're here he's like with these guys I guess I was like what do you do you have suitcases in you're in town from New York like are you not he's like no I just I don't know I'm going to figure it out I guess bounce around a little bit so I I it's just like there is no there's no groundedness when you're that rich it's almost like I don't know I can do anything all the time forever there's no source of repetitive yeah yeah I don't think it's a good thing for kids oh so bad it's it doesn't seem to work out I mean I I would think the only way you would get a kid through that is you got to take him to sports or something you got to get him involved in some adversity he's got to lose at something yeah a lot if you Lo if you lose at

31:32you start to understand how human you are when you're like oh my god there so many people better than me at so many things oh yeah dude cuz when you're given everything you never lose you never you're never heard no there's no negative in your life it's just kind of like how do you get any sense of you know any normaly or anything grounded in your hands when you're like yeah we need feedback yeah you need to know that that's not good and that's okay and and that's terrible and that's good you need to know where you land on the spectrum of in the social world that's why so many rich kids are socially so awkward cuz they never had to they never got beat up at school they never got made fun of it was it was all like was all flat flat it's all flat yeah you can't have all flat you don't want to have too many crazy dips you know cuz then you're but you definitely don't want

32:19flat like the worst Drive ever is not the longest drive the worst Drive ever is like when you're driving and those those roads that people always stop take album cover pictures in where you just see just flat and nothing there forever there nothing just flat like if you go the same distance but you're driving on like the the Pacific Coast Highway and you're headed up to San Francisco it's beautiful you barely recogniz you first of all you like the Cliff's right there the Cliff's right there what if I just you could just do that and people do do that for sure they just go off that cliff and you just want to make sure the guy on the other side is not thinking I'm just going to head on this guy and we're both going to go off this Cliff do this together let's do this I'm going to drag somebody with me him the last moments of your life flying off a cliff cuz some pilled up

33:07decid to just slam into you and knock you off afternoon it can happen have you seen those birds that jump off the cliff right after they're born have you seen these get this video yeah yes look up look up um bird jumps off cliff after birth so the moment they hatch the mother and the father go to the bottom of this like 500t cliff and the birds jump and and they hit them they they hit rocks all the way down and whoever survives survives with the parents oh my god dude it's amazing I just saw it on I think it's on um look like it was on planet Earth so I can't really show this we can watch it so people I'll I'll link the video or something what is the video called so people can uh chicks jump off cliff chicks jump off cliff which is another one that they do here in La sometimes in Hollywood I think that's different wow this is insane they don't even have

33:54wings yet nope nothing nothing just bold oh my God this is insane this is insane so this poor little thing is a it's kind of like a flying squirrel looking situation this is insane dude the first time I watched this I was so baked I was like is this a loop because it looks like it's never going to end it's so far I think he says it 500 or 600 ft or something so insane that this is how life gets born oh my God and he hits the rocks and you got to assume he's dead nope oh my God he's going to hit more rocks oh Jesus Christ so many rocks look at this thing it's flipping head over heels it hits more rocks oh it hit a little grass there got a caught a break caught a break caught a break for that's a good break look at this thing it's going down the side of the cliff Head Over Heels head first head head to a rock for a to a rock we got a minute we got a break nope of a

34:56break more more bouncing boom head for oh there's your face there's your dick hole here's a rock up your here's one on the side of your face here's one to your eyes here's one to your nose oh another 100 feet to go look there's mom and dad and mom's like is this going to make it look there's another one behind it no look at this boom how's he doing so insane they stop and wait to see which ones live which ones live Jesus Christ nature is so harsh I knew you would love this cuz I thought about you the first time I saw this and I was like this is so proof about surviving dude it's so survival this this is the most basic you have to leap and almost die the the moment you enter the world that chick is tough as that chick could go five rounds of Georgio petan and just shake it off versus a dead one a chick yeah there's one that didn't make it I'm sure there's a ton of dead ones blood over

35:52the rocks oh Jesus Christ yeah you could actually hit one of those corners and it could go gut you you know for sure I mean this is all Shale that stuff is so dangerous that's oh that one's dying oh Jamie don't show us this this is so sad I had a bird come in my house the other day and this poor little swam he he flew right into the window dunk sorry me laugh every time I see was going to go out and then woke up and then flew into another window full speed dunk out cold so I I thought he was I thought he was probably dead and my my daughters were going oh oh no is he going to die I go we don't know honey let's let's put him outside and hopefully he'll wake up woke up he did yeah he woke up like 5 minutes later like shook it off and flew away like imagine that was a person that thing was going like 30 m hour right into a window DK little tiny bird too

36:44just he got koed but then got up and and flew away came back for another round yeah R came in the house that it was weird I was at a buddy I was at a buddy's house uh at this like party and a hummingbird flew right into the house like right through the double doors and was stuck in the skylights and it was panicking cuz it didn't know what to like it wasn't willing to come down so I was just up enough that I was like I have this idea give me a huge Pan the biggest pan from the kitchen and pour uh sugar and water in it heat up the sugar a little bit so and put it and I put the pan up to it I got on a ladder put it up it started getting in there to drink the sugar water and I slowly took it down and walked it outside W that's some wizard I was Wizardry dude I was that's very smart you ever seen them in slow-mo man they're so bizarre they're their wings are moving so fast

37:35unbelievable it's insane like it's beautiful to watch man oh man I was in uh Costa Rica and we went to this place that had a uh it had some sort of a sanctuary for them the hummingbird sanctuary yeah do you know what it is you see it I went down to Costa Rica just last year so they have you know you can they have these feeders so you just hang out by them and take slow-mo on your iPhone and you see the thing floating around your head there it is right there I mean they could just hover it's so like how did they evolve like this it's so strange like no other bird makes that that weird sound when it goes by you it's like they have little wings but they move Stupid Fast how many how many how many per minute can does it say like how many uh I know their heartbeat is insane their heartbeat is like 100 times ours or something like that they're so cute they don't seem

38:23like killers at all no right they're just out there eating pollen and right look at that look at that it's incredible do they eat bugs like what do they eat they got the little tongue that's sticking up right but isn't that like going for like nectar and stuff that's for nectar yeah this is going to have some facts for us hummingbird lay one to three eggs several times per year eggs are about the size of a jelly bean huh that's not good facts I want to know what they eat yeah I want to know that kind of look at that nose they have the craziest beaks too like if that was a giant bird you'd be like what what the that's pretty sick did you see what that just saidt set of eyelids yeah they have extra set of eyelids and they can see ultraviolet wa that's amazing whoa that beak is crazy that be's like a Nar whale horn like it's so tiny we don't notice how crazy long their beaks

39:14are dude that's the other thing I haven't seen there's no consistency of color between all the birds do you know what I mean like usually most species have a similar color pattern are is there a bunch of different kinds of hummingbirds they insects oh they do insects tree sap pollen and insects so they're omnivores Interesting Man birds are a trip dude they they are some of the most unique animals on our planet I've I've really ignored them I I've really ignored Birds until I saw my first Eagle in person in the wild it's crazy right yeah I saw I was with uh Ari we were in um uh Alaska we were in Anchorage we were going fishing we're salmon fishing we're like dude that's a Wild Eagle this Eagle just standing there on this branch just looking down on us I was like what like you start realizing what they really are like oh that's like a murdering dinosaur bird that flies

40:05around and snatches fish out of the water was waiting for fish yeah just chilling we were catching these fish dude dude they like this big this salmon these these these powerful fish and this Eagle comes down and grabs it out of the water with his Talons and flies with it it's awesome dude I started tripping out on birds after that just being being near them in in the in the wild and seeing them move around around it just seems so different than seeing them in the zoo they're so hardcore they're wingspans are so amazing to me when they open up how huge they are whenever you see one in person you're like that is way bigger than I thought well so it's a view back to a much more ancient style of living thing you know I mean it's a view back to dinosaurs and they're starting to realize more and more dinosaurs uh fossils are being found with feathers how many

40:55Birds is that have you ever seen a moose in real life oh yeah shot a moose that's a moose right there whenever I go whenever I go up to Canada like have you ever been to bamp you know where that is in Alberta yeah I know where that is dude that that that has the biggest moose I've ever seen in my like I've seen I've seen moose when I was a kid but nothing like up in Northern Canada dude I mean be the size of a school bus I mean it's so big I think people think they think they know what a moose is cuz you're like yeah I think it's like a cow or something you know what I mean dude they're massive massive Animal B they're so big shocking it was twice the size of our car I was like get the out of here that's a mov yeah they're they're so big it's insane and if you run into them like you hit them with your car you're yeah you're they would they'll wreck you that

41:34was a grown up in the midwest dude I'd hear people getting bad car accidents with deer all the time these guys in Canada there is no stories about it you die you hit a it's not like dude you hear about Mikey hit a deer it's like you hit a moose it's like Mike's car exploded Mike is Mike is dead a deer will you up though there's buddy of mine who lives in Oregon a guy on the highway in his neighborhood hit a deer the deer flipped over his car and hit the car behind him and went through the windshield and killed the guy really the first guy was fine huh the first guy was fine the car the deer flipped over his car like as he hit it it went flying through the air and then it landed like right right on into this guy's car and killed him the craziest I ever saw I was like 8 years old with my dad driving on the Dan Ryan in Chicago and a car they the middle of the

42:22uh Lane was on the fast lane was under construction a car went over the Median on to oncoming traffic and hit another car oh Jesus like 100 yards in front of us I watched it happen it was the craziest I've ever seen in my life and it was like the afternoon I don't know if he was up or what right over the Medan right into another car and you saw the whole thing I watch I watched it happen I mean it it felt so fake when I was a kid I remember thinking I remember it getting older and asking my dad if it happened because I thought you know in your childhood sometimes you're like did I see that in a thing and that wasn't real you know and you formulate these different stories in your brain as a kid cuz you're you know that of what's real and fake when you're so young but dude I I can't forget that happening it was crazy that is crazy perfectly hit another car it was almost as if like

43:06magnetic head right head on wow yeah it was wild I think those Fast and the Furious movies have people up when it comes to like what you can and can't do in a car yeah dude they jump a car from like a building and to another building and live it's insane I mean there's a lot of dumb kids out there that watch those movies they got to be like yo man I got to give that a shot there has to be someone who thinks that like that's what's going to happen when they get behind the wheel bro I'm going to be the best ever I never even drove yet but once I drive I'm going to be the best ever over dog I watch that movie all the time people just want to be cool they want to be able to down ship spin that wheel do you ever watch those fail videos online of people showing off like showboating in nice cars that's my f that's one of my favorite yeah they're always like some guys like some guys

43:56like spin Wheels dude some guy in like a GTR like just right into the wall next to him just spin out crash right away it's just dude it's great I love to see that I love to see people showing off and then right away they're I love that nothing fun many videos of that now too I mean there's so it's almost like if you have a camera and you're pointing it at the guy you're kind of hexing him cuz he's saying man I hope I don't this up cuz it's going to be on every Internet site everyone's Twitter account Instagram page it's like you're you're kind of like putting too much pressure on them your accident is now sharable yeah your mistakes are now everyone's uh Joy that's the world we're in now your fuckups could be somebody's great Monday you know welcome to the new world it's brilliant it's a crazy new world man didn't exist was never like this yeah you didn't have to worry about

44:48someone seeing your up how old are you 33 I'm 49 when I was a kid we didn't even have like when I was boy back in the day no you you heard stories but somebody up somewhere over there this guy did that you know that's all that's all there was one guy in our town killed someone in a car and dragged this guy around like he he got the guy stuck under his car and he just kept driving did he not know he was under there or he was like it I don't care I'm going to prison anyway they don't know they don't know if he was drunk I don't I don't know I don't know when he got caught either but it was a story it was in the news and I remember it was in like uh I was delivering news apers at the time so I saw it like in the newspapers that I was delivering it's so weird to have known someone and then know that they ran over somebody in a car and then dragged him around yeah I

45:36didn't know him well but he was like one of those guys in the town I think he was a little older than me but he was one of those guys that was always kind of hanging out with a nice car he just had like a a nice Trans Am I was just going to say an irck Z was about the yeah his family had money and uh he ran over someone and dragged him around there was always this thing about people whose families had money like the rich kids get away with it well it was it was a weird thing too it's like we knew that they were like a little off like you always knew that the rich kids were never like a complete human right they were always like a like there was just a few of them that were just a little like if you knew they were Rich there's probably a lot of kids that we didn't know they were rich and they were rich but it was they weren't up so it didn't come through but the ones that

46:17wanted everybody to know they were rich like they always had designer clothes on and they always had the nicest and they always had like brand new cars like when they were 17 this guy had aand brand new car they're it's almost like they're uh a little bit uh animatronic like there's something robotic about really rich kids where it's just kind of like a super super high functioning in a very like disconnected level because they're so unaware of what it's like to not have yeah well I I'm watching these shows with my kid we we went to see this Diary of a Wimpy Kid yeah yeah it's actually a funny movie man there's some funny in there I laughed hard a couple times in that movie yeah I just went cuz they wanted to go but in this movie one of the things that's like really strikes home is like everyone is struggling this kid is like everything is falling apart always

47:06constantly and because of that he's kind of got a fun personality like he gets checked all the time as soon as he gets cocky he gets crushed again like it's just it just keeps happening through and there's a whole series of these movies but like that's not happening to that the rich kid that I grew up with just that's why probably when he hit the guy in his car and had the guy stuck under his car he didn't know what the to do yeah he's I mean he just thought he was going to get away with whatever he figured just he figured I just got to get away the got get I just clean the car there was a kid I went to high school with that uh had a hit and run and didn't and they got he got away with it I mean obviously I didn't know it was this kid I went to high school with but he got away with it for a long time it was such a public story that if a famous NASCAR driver at the

47:52time painted her name on his car like find so and so's kid killer cuz it was such a big deal this girl that was hit and run and he came out years later this is crazy he was pilled pilled the up and he showed up to her sister's house and admitted the whole thing to her sister and was saying he was going to like run away kill himself whatever and she cleverly she spoke polish she told her husband to call the cops and was trying to calm this kid down in the meanwhile telling him to call the cops and they finally caught this kid before he could off himself or something but he killed this girl on a hit and run and thought he and got for what it's worth got away with it for a long time man but he was probably not a bad person he just was weak at the time and it haunted him for yeah he had it had to come out man crazy right that's a mistake that if you make like God damn it does like

48:40that happen like like from from your area of where you grew up like do you read stuff now years later that you hear about up from back then that like has gotten exposed now like these teach like these teachers I knew ran a prostitution ring dude it came out in the paper the teachers did the teachers dude the shop the old shop teacher his daughter the shop teacher pimp the shop Teacher Shop teacher was pimpen dude that's insane who the girls the girls were high school students no not high school students they were just like girls in the community probably girls that went to high school and graduated but older girls that they were pimping out from the school they were pimping from school what school was this this was out in the suburbs of Chicago wow here's the question if they did make prostitution legal they set it up just like you can go get a massage you can go have sex

49:26with somebody Y how much would that change like thetion of marriage relationships nobody's getting married dude it's over it's over it's only a law that's keeping like what percentage of people married I mean you you said it before when we when we when we touched on this prior the reason that we make it okay is because the church gets involved right so if the church says it's okay it's like my dad was a drug addict growing up my dad was was in and out of prison my whole life when I was a kid and my mother divorced my father when I was one so I don't really have any recollection of any of that so I don't have that like damage that people like my dad got divorced when we were 16 I didn't see it I didn't know it but my mom came from such a hardcore Irish Catholic world that my family the older generation didn't approve and was like you can't divorce this man that's against our religion and

50:17my mom was like he's a terrible person to me I have to get out of this relationship and now she was just they were both young you know she just wanted to make the right move for a baby but the church has so much influence on certain parts of society that my grandmother was like almost disowning like but that's such a reality for that generation that it was like how could you what do you mean divorce I mean that's like you're you're you're you're going to hell like that's it you're done so my mom had that kind of up in her brain of like that that's how much influence the church has over marriage and coupling and it's crazy it's crazy it's unbelievably ridiculous that people succumb to that it's so crazy it's controlling man well the the Catholic church in particular is one of the weirdest ones ever so strange it's this the insanely high percentage of

51:08people that are involved in child abuse yeah I mean what other religion has that connected to it like that none like not what uh the Muslim is the biggest in the world right the biggest religion in the world right I think it is if it's not Christianity yeah they're probably Toe to Toe either way you don't hear about that so are they covering up it's not the same thing the thing about the priests and the priests being forced to be celibate and then spending time with boys like the that has always gone bad yeah forcing guys to be celibate bad forcing guys to hang out with boys bad a someone something is weird weird shit's going to happen if there's no parents in the room dude when when as soon as you deprive someone of something they are going to have it they want it immediately and then you attach to it the ultimate power that comes being a representative of God yeah like you're

51:59wearing a priest's outfit to a little kid like that kid will suck your dick he'll do anything you say he doesn't know what's going on he's a baby o crazy it's so dark dude deep dark mind control and when you find out how many of them yeah that's the thing is it's not just one it's not just 10 like the more you hear the more you're like dude this is not a accident these aren't coincidences this isn't like a a conspiracy this is a fact that this is rampant and it's crazy it's crazy because it's still happening oh they don't talk yeah it's no it's like it's you know well how about that Benedict guy the Pope that had to resign they found out that he had been involved in the moving of these child molesters from one place to another place close the story down shut everybody up and then move that guy to another place and one of the guys went on to molest a hundred deaf

52:49kids what yeah he molested a 100 deaf kids and he was put into that position by this guy who wound up being the pope 100 deaf kids 100 De kids yeah it was it's horrible aw it's there's so much involved in it there's so many people that covered up there's so many different versions of these stories so many stories thousands and thousands of stories of people molested by priests yeah I mean it's crazy and if you bring it up immediately you get people defending it no no no look you're exaggerated blah blah blah blah blah like I I've said this before like imagine if NASCAR drivers that many kids it' be shut down shut the down but because it's the church we're like well list you know but there's good things too they're working for God like okay it's crazy that any organization can have a history of kids we're working for God is God's side job children because it's not

53:44whatever it is it's not working but we we forgive them we well we it's not all bad we don't want to break the whole thing up definitely don't want to do that no stealing is not bad a kid is the same as like some minor bull infraction in society and thousands and thousands of cases maybe even millions of cases it's so and then still you have these world leaders like Trump met with the Pope the pope was all bummed out Trump should be like I'm bummed out to be next to you what about what you represent you're mad at me cuz I'm pulling out the climate Accord what about all the kid bro did you bring up the kid he's been kids that's oh that's right you do a good Trump have you seen the pictures of trump with the Pope the Pope's totally disp is real bummed Pope should relax he should slow as roll you're part of a giant kid ring yeah who do you think you are yeah and you're getting cocky

54:33because the billionaire guy who uh tricked America into voting for him yeah is uncomfortable do you know what the you know what the the thing that bothers me the most is the church is all about the community and the people they don't pay taxes on all this great real estate they own tons of it how come they can't house homeless people or sick people in those churches all day long while they're there that's free property yeah I don't understand there it is can't believe I got to do this Trump's like my hair looks good look good hair day it's a good hair day Pope you like my hair touch it it's real I got it done the guy that I use went to tonian guy the hair stylist School the color of his hair is like the color of every retired Florida golfer in his 70s so gross he's got this weird blonde gray thing going on it's like he moves it around a little like some days it's like

55:18a darker brown some days it's like a blonde like blonde gray it looks it's just like sand he's getting it worked on is what I'm saying like this is not the color of the hair it's one you do one of two things let me be clear about this either you work on your hair or you don't work on your hair okay so either you dye your hair or you don't dye your hair it's one of those two things how when you dye your hair be consistent you can't go gray and then be blonde again then be darkhaired it's too confusing to me I I need to know what kind of a person are you like how much you working on your hair what's your level of hair care how much time you spending putting that together every day does did Donald Trump change his hair of course he obviously of course he did yeah he's changed his hair color it goes he's moving it around his hair is probably very gray at this point

56:06he's in his 70s there's nothing wrong with that what did you think about all this Kathy Griffin she's ridiculous it's insane she needs friends why are you doing that it's just it's 100% attention man what a call for attention being edgy she thought she was being edgy and she probably was talking with the wrong people and got the wrong idea in her head and went with it and had no one like you around they go what the are you talking about that's the president and it's a person yeah it's a human yeah you can't you can't pretend you want to murder him Isis style and hold his head up to the camera like a hostage video that's crazy I think it's just it's it's one of those things where both both parties both extreme left and extreme right are at such a a heightened version of what's Happening that people are becoming blind to like logic yes 100% right logic is like it's gone yeah you would

57:01never if somebody did that with Obama holy oh my God I mean the world would stop spinning there'd be so much chaos from that it would be it it would be an insane thing to see that happen well look it's just that's not anyone's solution like that's not a real like holding up that head is not a real solution like killing anybody like a TA not only that even if it's like the worst person in the world cutting their head off and holding it up like that is barbaric we wouldn't even want that from Osama Bin Laden if we found the the video of Osama bin Laden and one of the seals held him down and cut his head off and then held it up to the camera we'd be extremely like what are we doing why didn't you just kill them like we're not them we're not we're not torturing them we're not trying to terrorize all these other people we are not going to become what we're afraid of right right I mean

57:52that's what she's doing by holding that head up you are becoming what you were afraid of you're becoming a monster you're you're you're deadfaced you're not even emotionally attached to the fact that you're holding up this bloody head like what kind of nonsense false imagery is this like you don't really think that you don't really feel that is it art like what is it is it art that's what I I'm sure that's what the argument from from her sake was it's an artistic piece with a with a with a photographer who's but it's about a real person that's not Medusa it's not like a a dragon's head you're holding up this is crazy it's if it's your own head it's your own head you can make a f trying to make a statement sure but it's like what are you doing you're terrorizing that person if you're that you have I know everybody thinks that the president has to assume a certain amount of mockery

58:35and I agree that he does I agree everybody in any position of power like that is going to you're going to have people coming at you of course but there's a difference between that and advocating a a brutal assassination and Terror video that's head head removal that's just yeah it's not that's not no one's going to be sympathetic towards your idea and in fact you're going to EMP power the people that are opposed to you cuz they're going to think oh these people are these crazy IDE who want to like literally promote the murder and and torture of someone cutting their head off the whole thing is crazy but it's just it's the something that people do where they're trying to get attention or they're trying to entertain they're trying to be shocking they just it's it's it's a continuation of of uh trying to be in people's uh frontal lobe you know it's like people in would at some

59:26point just want to stay in Hollywood and I feel like that's what she she does a lot I want to St I want to do something controversial on the New Year's Eve host that she does or whatever so she can stay in Hollywood it's such a this great this great uh director once told me that the S there's never the imagine if this is uh if this is an actor and and uh as if we're the Sun and and you know the sun in the earth and moving moving around one another just like an actor in a spotlight it's as if the spotlight has is on the actor at some point but when it moves away if the actor tried to move towards it is when it becomes sad when when it shifted out of your line of sight when when your work and your progress has shifted as if your time perhaps may be coming to a close as far as it's worth when you are continuing to search for it there's nothing more desperate and more obvious

60:13he's like you can always see when someone's hunting for it again it looks sad it looks it looks desperate it's also contrary to the very reason people like you in the first place like people like you because you're doing things they enjoy you're doing good work you're doing good comedy you're making a good movie whatever the you do making a good song that's why they like you they don't want to like you because you're trying to get attention or that you're trying to get people to to just what I mean what is that I mean what what what do you get out of holding a head like what kind of attent do you get like a yeah yeah you go girl like yeah we're with you him kill him like you're there's people that do think like that they could have easily been right there might be left they could have easily been right it's a it's a way of thinking and you get that way of thinking and

61:03then you program yourself you get locked into this predetermined pattern of behavior like all right-wing people like a giant percentage of them have like an established series of uh of of opinions about certain things that we count on because they're the right right like like abortion or even it used to be gay marriage was one of them there's always a bunch of them that are just climate change is one of them like it's like halfway there like maybe 25% of them hardcore on the right whereas the left climate change is almost 100% accepted right without without question it's weird like how do these these ideas become right or left ideas yeah who logged them into the database of which side you they belong on it's talking points people on Fox News start talking about it people agree with it they like convenient things ah it's a cycle it comes goes don't worry about it what we

61:54need is jobs and and they they run with that and it's a to it's it's this this predetermined pattern that people just love to fall into man it's weird it's creepy there should no longer be separation of just permanent party it shouldn't be your always left and always right that's so up too vulnerable I feel it myself I feel myself the urge to be a part of groups I do it all the time we all do we all do that's that's that's that is nature and habit right you everyone wants to belong to a community that's why fraternities exist that's why when you join a gym you start to you know the moment you join a gym you start to see people repetitively that you know and you it starts off with a hey what's up that guy you see all the time then it's hey man oh yeah and then it becomes a relationship you create because it's communal because oh we both do this thing we both enjoy I see you

62:43often we do this thing we create tribes we love hendes we like to be a part of our little tribe and when it gets infiltrated it you you become vulnerable you feel like the walls are weakening it's almost like when the word gentrification gentrification really just means a a tribe's area has been compromised you know it's like this has been this for so long when white people or people of privilege or money move into anywhere they're trying to overtake that tribe that's why there's so much backlash that's why people get so angry about neighborhoods turning over quote unquote because they're like what can be ours that's it's such a delicate thing because you're like you can't stop that you're never going to stop that well not only that it's there's a game being played and you're a part of it because you're paying rent yep and there's a game being played you're part of it when you're working

63:38you're getting paid for your time during the now you have to decide what you're going to do with that time and you might feel very stuck in this game that you're at right now where you're paying this guy for rent and you're working for that guy and he's giving you a certain amount of money and it all kind of like evens out at the end there's nothing left over but you're still playing a game this guy's playing the game too but he's been playing it for 35 years and this game is I buy houses right and I sell them to white people and uh I'm going to keep playing that game cuz this is all legal and this is why you pay me rent stupid it's a we know the game but the game is I'm 30 years ahead of the game than you and you know I'm a 70-year-old guy with a pocket protector filled with pens and I've got a bunch of apartment buildings all over the place and I flip those

64:17there's a lot of those guys out there like you this gentrification thing I know it it's uncomfortable for people they're like we're losing the old neighborhood like let's go back to the teps let's go back to the cave we lost the old caves man we we're not the same once we moved out of the caves it's going to happen neighborhood shift things change you can't hold them back you can't decide no we want this neighborhood to stay shitty you know or we want this neighborhood to be all Puerto Rican well listen sometimes it doesn't work that way some people die new people move in do you really care if Swedish people move in your neighborhood you know we're losing chinat Town what do we do I are you going to be okay yeah is it okay if they you live here or people there's going to be change going to come and go you can't control it you can't control it based on Nostalgia this

64:59has always been East Harlem's F finest slovaki place we have to keep it like no we don't no no one has to do anything I do love East har Harlem's famous laki place I will say I don't even know what that is it's not even a thing I was searching for a word but I was like that that happens like when when restaurants close and people get furious yeah someone doesn't have to keep the restaurant open stupid I was just up in I was up in Seattle and these guys uh these Costa Rican guys I started talking to at the at the Fremont Brewery were telling me about this great Caribbean food place up the street and I said uh what makes it so great and he's like you know it's it's just the recipe because uh the guy that used to own it was this great this Cuban guy just the brilliant chef and he he uh got sued for illegal wage wage garnishing of these illegal employees that couldn't speak English so

65:47he got sued so the city shut him the down some other white rich guy came in bought the recipes from the guy to help him out with his lawsuit still runs wow just as good it can be done if someone does it correctly I guess he did he he bought the recipes he was like the mistake I think when people buy a bar or buy a place they think they're buying the place n there's more there's more than just the the brick and mortar there's more to it than that so he knew the food success was because of this guy the way he did it you can't just like it's not just a Cuban restaurant or a Caribbean restaurant he was like I want to do it exactly how you did it so he paid for him for to give him those recipes so he cooked just the recipes show how he was cooking it too he cooked it he he paid him for the recipes and I don't know the rest of the details but that that is to get it back

66:31to where it was and this dude from Costa Rica was like still the same I love it wow he a couple of white guys that are back there now heuse the same food and doesn't doesn't mean that I don't appreciate people that live in these neighborhoods that are being forced out you're going to have to get a new place to live and you you can't afford it you can't afford to live in the neighborhood anymore cuz people are buying it up I get it I understand that it sucks but ultimately it's probably good for everybody it's definitely good for the neighborhood the neighborhood's going to get like these nice houses now and people are going to move in they're going to have it's going to be more value if you did buy a place if you did take the risk and and bought a place that place going to be worth more money now right I know maybe you couldn't buy a place I know it's hard to buy a place

67:08when I get paid I get it but you don't have to do that I know you feel like you have to do that and you can come up with a bunch of excuses and everybody would argue all day long about white privilege and you're lucky and this and that but the bottom line is you're not in a cage all right if you're not in a cage and you're out there doing something you could figure out a way maybe it's a month from now maybe it's six months from now to transition into something else figure your way through the maze right we don't all start at the same spot in the Maze no agreed couldn't but don't ever complain about your spot in the Maze just figure figure your way through that thing right you're in the Maze yeah it sucks definitely hard not easy keep moving keep moving keep moving don't Jam this up with your tears you keep moving you don't understand capitalism and that's why I'm a socialist okay just

67:55keep moving though you don't you're just talking tooo much you're not moving enough go do it yeah there's not enough happening here there's complaining about other things happening I get it I get it it's not good the climate change agreement is a terrible thing to leave it's a bad thing to leave his own daughter told him not to leave but I never like Chriss so we got to get out of Paris she did his own his own daughter was like this is a bad idea this guy's crazy he's going against science he is perfectly out of his mind he going against science like the scientists are saying hey we've got to reduce emissions 100% we're polluting the air we breathe we're ruining the very air that we need to exist on yep no not true don't agree we bought we bought new air there's so much air have you ever seen how much air there is maybe he's doing this because he's about to Mo

68:48move into position to use one of those gigantic building-sized air filter things maybe he's going to have a trump air filter and set them up in every city you could all go back and buy diesel trucks and no one's going to care anymore we're going to clean that air nice it's kind of like idiocracy did you ever see that movie so ahead of time never saw that movie dude it was that kind of thing where the future is like they don't drink water anymore they'd be convinced by this this like Gatorade type drink where it's like this is better than water and people like it's got to be so everyone drinks it that makes sense they're like it's better than water if you can convince enough people what it is people will get on board regard Blind Faith I'm trying to talk about that on right now about blind we have so much Blind Faith like I ate a I went to the gas station

69:29to get this thing I ate a brownie it was like a uh Power like a you know protein packed brownie or whatever I just trusted that that's all real I don't know what that's probably just a ass brownie but it's like pack with protein yeah if you actually got the real statistics on it got what craved it's got electrolytes it's got plant CRA what was the name of the stuff what was it called do it say what it was called the the juice it was like but it looked like Gatorade it was like were watering their plants with it and nothing was alive anymore but out of the sink would come this Gatorade type looking drink brondo That's right brondo The Thirst mutilator your thirst that's hilarious I need to watch that movie click on that picture uh to the up just all the way over down at the that left that one yeah look at that that's what the world has become that makes sense you see the size of that

70:23Costco that's hilarious that could happen totally that's all totally possible have you been watching this handmaid's tale no what is that no have you know about this on Hulu man it a book written um I want to say 20 years ago uh it's Elizabeth Moss is a star of it uh it's essentially about um if World War III broke out and we became like an ultimate police state and there was like a subgovernment that took over and we went back to essentially Biblical times when women who were fertile were used for the Rich As handmaids for making babies whoa dude it's trippy as whoa you got to watch it bro so it's based on Modern time yes it takes place in modern time as if World War II broke out I don't want to give you too many details but then dude we're under a police state so these handmaids these fertile women who are of lower socioeconomic status they must wear

71:16these things and abide by their masters which are the wealthy 1 percenters of the world who own these fertile women because their wives are infertile so they must repopulate this new community who dude it's right up your alley it's insanely good but it was a book that was written while that's a total possibility well that's why dude's getting so much love in fact some of the parallels in the show of what's going on in society now and some of the commentary because this was shot prior to the election it's so specific I mean that's why people are falling in love with it because they're like this is creepily real like it's almost you know I I think with what especially from a for for what I've heard from women's perspective you know like like taking the fear of women's rights being removed as far as things like Planned Parenthood or or what have you the choices of your

72:03own body I think there's so much echoed in this show that it feels creepily real where it's like you could one day just go like they do in one of the scenes without giving anything away it's like all the women are fired today well you know that Iran of today is nothing like Iran of like the 1960s no have you ever seen like the difference between Iran then and now no they became when I think when it was when the Sha took no when the Ayatollah took over cuz the Ayatollah was a religious figure and he took over and the the Chang the country I'm I'm terrible with Iranian history so if you're listening to this and you're upset that I'm getting it wrong so many Iranians are pissed essentially they used to dress like much more free yeah look at that it was like much more westernized look it was like the 70s it looked like 70s yeah it look like 70s in United States I mean and then

72:53changed and now if you go there today I mean look the Middle East is with the shiny example of what is possible in 2017 as far as like L cut her shirt is there I mean that's that's you're dead if you'd wear that now big old titties too Chua Chua Chua yeah you that'd be it right she'd be slain for that now they have to cover their head I mean they have like religious scarf laws and you know what's really crazy is they're better than like Saudi Arabia I mean Saudi Arabia is what you you can and can't do today I mean you're essentially like a second class citizen if you're a woman below I don't think there's are they allowed to drive now are they changing that I don't know I mean I know there's some people that are trying to change that there's some people that are progressive over there that are trying to change that I think they're straight property man that's what that they view

73:42them as like straight numbers the idea you have to keep your head covered you have to wear the those those robes and the Garb and and then there's women that are trying to say that that's a a source of empowerment there's a bunch of crazy people out there just like there was always Uncle Tom's like during the Civil Rights Movement and just like people are just there's always going to be like black guys for Trump there's always contrarian and you're like really yeah there's always there's going to be women that say that wearing the how do you say it hijab hijab I think that's uh it's empowering for women the it is you have to wear it it's a religious symbol of Oppression how could you how could you I understand being born into something and not knowing any other way I do understand that I get it too right but at the same time or born into it and being convinced that this is the way

74:23that it should be but when you see freedom of the world when you see the freedom of the world that we're all born naked and free to be these things I don't know why there isn't a little bit more of a click that goes why do these women in other places have more freedom because because the goal of any sort of religious constriction is questioning right so if you question it you're automatically but if you question it enough where you research and you look and you find out and you learn I would assume you would become enchanted with the idea of being free of just wanting to not have someone tell you where you can walk what do that makes sense but when you connect an ideology with with God and with the idea of the Divine that's the ultimate reason to stick around like at the end of the day it's clothes clothes are made by people if you're telling me that God

75:19is saying that you have to wear some kind of clothes and not other kind of clothes I'm calling yeah who's the people you're not talking to God he's never talked to you and told you to wear that this is crazy and when you have an ideology where you're trapped into dressing a certain way or wearing certain clothes or wearing a certain emblem or some sort of a symbol you're trapped by the mind of a human being that is the mind of a human being they've created a pattern that they want you to not deviate from whatsoever I want you to walk around like this we're going to cover this and you're going to wear these and maybe have one of those on your neck and maybe a certain amount of beads that symbolizes you're you're single you're not yeah this is some by this is by a person this is some cult 100% has nothing to do with God like you you would be serving God

76:02more to be free and naked like that God created you if God is real he didn't make clothes God doesn't have any stock and Levis God's not making burkas God would like you to be naked if that if that's real if God just lets or where whatever the you want cuz it's all there for humans to wear like if people are making clothes they're making clothes for people they should be able to wear whatever the they want if I was God I would say yeah that makes sense where where would you like stay warm you know sure don't don't die I guess yeah yeah I think the only reason God wants you to cover your hair why this is nonsense this is people talk yeah someone said that a person said it we believe in it well the priest must dress like a wizard why why does he have to dress like that no one dresses like the pope anymore why is the pope dressed like the Pope get the get the

76:47suit off someone loved Wizardry so much they were like I got to we got to keep that we got to keep somebody in that I used to always think that when I was a kid and I'd have to go to church I'm like why does he have to wear that stupid collar so so so silly to me what is that collar he has to wear that collar so I know that he's real I'm the one oh he's got the thing on he's got the priest collar look at that look at that Pope he's got wings like like he's in a video an MTV video in the 80s what is that that one that one sponsored by Red Bull is that blowing in the wind is that what it is that's the answer my friend BL in the wind blowing in the wind Catholicism is one of the and this is what I was raised in sort of look there's a wizard wizard hat Joe just for you look above my my favorite there you this that that's so funny and why is that any more outrageous than that thing that

77:32he actually did wear that's even more weird look at that the giant crucifix look at his hat oh my God they're so silly they're the silliest people the fact that anybody says yeah yeah yeah that guy's so keep that picture up there heavy that cloth the clo look Go full screen with that what in the are we looking at here this guy's got a 3ft tall hat on and it's all gold and studded in ornate like wouldn't you think that God would want you to be humble if you're a servant of God you really supposed to be covered in gold look at his gold pimp ring like I represent God with my nugget ring look at that nugget kiss it this is a Persian rug draped around his shoulders this this elaborate work on that robe thing that he's got on it's so Preposterous the idea that God would want you to dress like that you know what I always think of when I see like big elaborate things like this is at the

78:24end of the day he's going to like take that off to take a and it's like so sad to like take that off and drape it on the ground you know what I mean when he's sitting there Stacks it on his lower back when he go to wipe he did a terrible job of cleaning up so the the bottom of it has a little stain on it but he's still the pope so he's bringing it up to the sink and he's trying to wash it in the sink and it's just sort of w wet and brown he's trying to get that little streak out of the bottom of his thing we call him the Poo pop but don't say that being disrespectful to my beliefs you're disrespect yes if this is what you believe you believe this guy is the guy who's talking for God come on man I'm not saying there's no God what I'm saying we have to be very wary of people they're just people and Cults and people and the patterns of thinking and behaving that they want you to

79:12engage in this is what we're looking at here there there's two people holding this guy's coat these two guys who are dressed like gay matadors like giant gold encrusted gay Matadors doors and they're holding on to his cape they're fighting the devil and they're walking with him as he walks around with his giant staff of magic he's got a Wizard's wand it's a goddamn Gandalf wand he's dressed like a wizard and he's got a staff like why isn't that glowing why isn't there a lightning bolt going from that up into the storm clouds that looks like the level of Cape is way above the other guys like that's a graduation for them to be Cape is real big that's a big deal Cape is a huge position look at these guys these two Cape the guy on the left probably annoying as I bet he tells a lot of long stories when he gets the pope alone he's like you know I just wanted to tell you about my cousin and

80:02uh his uh his belief in the Lord and you know I think right now he's not getting along too good is this the first pope that's okay with gay marriage isn't that what he said yeah he's got to say that he's the first one that was like whatever he tossed out the throne too he's got a normal chair does he yes that's kind of cool it is kind of cool but I think that was probably a joint effort they're like look it was a PC move that was a politically correct see these doors behind me there's a thousand kids back there waiting to suck your dick okay we got to make this right though we got to we got to clean up the image we're still going to do plenty of kid what if you saw the pope uh threw away a chair and got one of those like the medicine balls to sit on you know what I mean like he started he started really getting he had standing desks and he started getting like Corporate America what is

80:44the what are you showing me here Jamie is that the the pope mobile the new one or whatever yeah the pope mobile the new one doesn't have bulletproof glass anymore the last Pope was like I know they want to kill me I'm hiding look at they don't even need glass all the way up cuz his back arches over so much he doesn't sit up straight so they don't need high glass it's like a child window I wonder if that is different colors of glass because I would imagine you want to keep the head shots from coming down from the roof totally I mean if someone's going to shoot that dude but this guy doesn't even think anybody's going to shoot him and he's like if someone wants to shoot me they'll shoot me do it it's done yeah he's he's exposed is it a Benz it's a benzo huh yeah you know God always said he loved Mercedes more baby Jesus Loves A G wagon kid like the other

81:25old ones a Benz too the old bulletproof one I bequeath my son a Mercedes Benz boy this nothing says faith like driving around in a bulletproof fish tank right I mean that just shows you you really have a belief that God has a plan can run flat half inch thick steel plate lightweight Kevlar armor godamn 3in composite plastic glass to with with an explosive Jesus Christ it's 5 tons that's 10,000 lb truck that's crazy 15 M gallon that's very efficient yeah that is really 0 to 66 seconds what that's quick dude wait a minute how's that even possible that's get that thing on Top Gear run a stop sign a stopwatch with that there's no way that gets 0 to 60 in 6 seconds we're going to race the pope Mobile versus the king of Saudi Arabia's mobile that's hilarious dude you sound like the guy from The Not Top Gear it's like fifth gear or something like that is that it

82:22the other one the other one that's who you sound just like them that's creepy the pope mobile it's something I like about British car uh analysts oh dude meet so much well they take they take the piss out of everything I like how self-deprecating they when they on cars it's my favorite Jeremy Clarkson's the best dude it's hilarious the way he shits on things is so much fun and I just like to see friends dump on each other on TV I think that's fun to watch people dump on each other well especially in this day and age it would be considered bullying they bullying their friend that's really rude to on him like that yeah they just go after each other constant it's a fun show man yeah they I probably they have a beer afterwards it's fine it's fine they were playing characters like James May would be Captain slow yeah yeah yeah I love that they up when they canceled that show Jeremy

83:13Clarkson punched some producer and they canceled the show and fired him if he knocked out a tooth or some like that well he's drunk that's what happens you want to hang out with a big crazy drunk dude you want to talk don't talk talk get hit you guys are all drinking that's how it goes down you guys had a bar fight the most normal thing happened and he apologized afterwards and the other guy accepted it it was just they up yeah why can't that be the end of it I don't know man and they have a new one they're doing now and Matt LeBlanc from friends is on it no is he a big car guy yes oh wow he's a giant car guy and he's a he's a nice guy yeah I I don't know anything about him but I didn't know that comes off like a good car guy it's not that he's bad it's just that godamn Jeremy Jeremy Clarkson is a icon yeah he's a maniac man he an icon but Matt LeBlanc is uh is he a car

84:04collector does he have his own car he loves cars I don't know to what extent but he definitely loves cars he knows how to drive too he drives on the show like he's driving a Porsche 911r he can rip it he knows what he's doing that's good yeah he he can drive it's so he must have some experience some real track time experience but the um guy Chris Harris who's on it he's been on the podcast before that gu he's my favorite out of all the guys out there that are reviewing cars now and he knows so much about them like he really understands like the the geometry and the physics behind like the suspension they can tell you what they've changed what they've improved what it feels like and what's being lost in this that's always impressive to me to have a bevy of knowledge like that my dad's worked in the automotive aftermarket industry for so my stepdad who's my dad but what

84:47does he do dude for years and years he worked for uh the the ever famous Turtle Wax Car Wash he was the president of sales for Turtle Wax man us to sell Turtle Wax and then now he the gold standard dude and now he works uh but the turtle fired him the shell fired him them and then he works for this company called hannes who's out of uh out of Britain and they they are one of like the last remaining companies that makes zero uh a toz manuals on hand building Vehicles wow so if you want to handb build kit cars or you want to literally build a car from scratch most of their sales go to like mechanics auto body shops but they're also they own the rights to um fictional how do I say this they own the rights to fictional mechanics uh fictional mechanisms that in our film world are real like the Millennium Falcon they own the rights to how to build a Millennium Falcon from scratch whoa and

85:41they sell that manual that's a real manual you can buy is that crazy that is crazy yeah they have that for a bunch of cars kid cars are pretty wild D kit cars I was always fascinated with my buddy's dad used to build MGS all the time and let us around in them and I was fascinated with GS cuz he he loved them I mean there's this dope English kit car that was for sale really recently and you would you would buy it and then once you got it over here then you had to put an engine in it but they' sell it to you with no engine right you got to buy you will you build it first and they drop it in there yeah but it wasn't that it was a different it was wasn't a total kit car like you start from scratch you attach the suspension you it wasn't that it was like they would sell it to you as a as a car with no engine and then you would have to put the engine in it's a dope

86:27the name is like it's right there but there's so many so many blocks I could there's only so many blocks that could fit in that framework right yeah yeah you would get like a parameter you know like a V8 LS1 or something like that and try to put it in there God damn it noble noble that's what it's called Noble car it's called a noble do it's a dope looking car man and and guys I I think they're just you know you'd only have a certain amount of horsepower it could take but I didn't think I don't think it' had the drivetrain either I think you had to add the add the drive train as well I think essentially was just a frame and the doors and all that it must have just been parts from other third party car manufacturers and they they got whatever Parts they could put them together you built that and then the engine is what from anywhere at all I think you'd have to just know how to

87:12do it I mean there's a whole market now where they buy engines and then they put them in older cars so they'll buy like a one of the big companies that does it is a company called icon and um uh what they do is they take uh like a 69 bronco yeah and they strip it down they put the car back together again with a modern suspension then they take a 2017 Ford Mustang engine and put it in the Bronco yeah so they put totally modern brakes totally modern suspension Bronco engine what but the uh Bronco engine's a 19 you know a 2017 uh Ford Ford GT it's called a coyote motor it's a really high-end high-tech motor it's a really nice motor so you have like this old school car so they have like kits like they do that with LS1 LS maybe you and I talked about this someone was saying that they were taking classic M Ford might have been doing this themselves where they take

88:07classic Mustangs and put new Mustang engines in old classic Mustang bodies no we were talking about that you and I were talking about that there's a guy who's got a page on Instagram where he did it and it's I think it's uh I think it's called GT500 00 super swap so he's got a someone had a Shelby Shelby GT500 from 2012 and he put that body of a 1969 car over the 2012 car so it's the best of both worlds that's it right there it is so beautiful it's so beautiful wow so this guy nailed it and but he's only done one car I thought he was like doing it I thought there was a company that was doing it but apparently it's just this one dude who's done this what is that for did it say what he's selling those for I don't think he's selling it no he just wants to show you how dop his is he should sell the out of that thing he should sell the out of that look that would be I had a 2012 uh

89:06GT500 it was a great car that's another one though that's a different color oh it's different car oh look at that look at that helping a friend sell 68 Mustang 33k oo that's a beautiful car wow 33,000 miles is nothing that is nothing that's a beautiful card God those things were classic those 1960s Mustangs are some of the most beautiful shapes ever and to take that and put a I think 2012 the GT500 packed 550 horsepower yeah almost 600 isn't that crazy that this won't be in the future that like in the future like no one's going to have a lot of these current cars now are just going to go by the wayside like there's only so many cars that will stick around as Classics from the you know early 2000s era yeah there's not going to be any like driving yourself in 100 years no it's over like that that idea is it's dead gone have that's a noble yeah that's it right there is that a dope car

90:01has a Ferrari body a little bit right kind of sort of like like an old um more like what is the car I'm thinking of the lotus used to look like that yeah the Lotus that's why like the Lotus the cool lotuses of like wow look at that oh that's a newer one huh wow that's fck tight that's a that's a digital image we can't hear you you sorry the website's pretty cool back where does it say they're Italy right is that where they're out of uh oh British I think they don't have airbags or they didn't have airbags yeah cuz if you're going 180 it that doesn't that doesn't look like an airbag to me it just looks like a steering wheel you die you die I guess yeah I think that's too complicated yeah it that airbag thing I would I would want to find out like no that looks like it might have one actually might have an airbag no that's a horn bro a horn yeah it that's it I think that was the problem I

90:56think they hadn't gone through all of the uh FC what is it who what what would be the uh what is that the name of that now I can't think the fa no the uh ihsa safety motor yeah ihsa yeah that thing's really sexy looking man dop car that's all that carbon fiber in there God those seats look amazing but see that that e bra is up but it doesn't look like it's stick that's just what you put your in your oh that's where you get oh when you Lu is there one in the front too can you suck one while you one no no you can't be greedy that wouldn't be Noble look at the inside of that thing see go back to that see there's no that that's all push button there is no sck no manual no manual transmission that's what they're all using now those exotic Italian cars and everything everything is paddle shifts now I know well look at this did you ever did you see this I I had this uh

91:51this was for a thing hold on let me show you really bummed out at the new NSX look at that fun thing huh I rented that for the shoot that we were doing oh that's beautiful that's the old Magnum PI Ferrari man no that's uh a couple years later a 355 GT right it's a similar design though um John litz had one of those I drove that once John let me drive his car that year of Ferrari uh or well not just that year but I mean that was when Ferrari's uh one was down you know Ferrari's one is down yeah in instead of up reverse is up but one is down two 3 four five but that thing was so much fun look at that that's right I forgot that they had it backwards yeah it was backwards 1995 was I think the year of that Ferrari somebody wrote Pontiac Fiero dope Pontiac Fiero do you remember when they used to have those Kit cards when they would take like a Pontiac Fiero and put

92:41like Ferrari bodies on the outside like a fake Ferrari body yeah that's it's pretty great man so much work somebody just showed me uh I I forgot about Lamborghini Kosh and it was like their something year anniversary and they just are re-releasing the cachas do you remember those cars oh yeah dude that was when I I remember thinking that that was the only car that I ever thought was worthy of any amount of money that it was worth I was like that's the any dime that thing is worth I would buy that thing do you remember thater Rocky drove that car in Rocky 4 when he was going through a real hot time trading for this Russian and so he had like there's a crazy seene look at this look at him a handsome Bastard with his boxing shoes on hilarious that's the count baby he's a beautiful man back then um but there's a uh like it's literally a music video where they play where he's in the car

93:39and the music starts playing yeah when he's Cru he's driving it's so corny it's so cheesy yeah give me no easy way out give me some volume on this this is so terrible the people at home can hear this or no yeah South look how that plate was so he's he's driving around and he's thinking of Dolph lungren kicking his ass while he's driving around and he's in his Lamborghinis he's so cool he leaves his Mansion oh it's so silly oh dude he's the man look it's so silly no Smiles at all not happy not excited about it yeah he took a deep breath I got my tie on sophisticated now I just got to think about where my life is going the best part about it is to do this movie or to do this fight he had to go to Old School methods and move to the woods and was carrying logs around and running the snow chopping down trees dude that's how you get in shape a man man out in the woods the

94:47atrian I got to leave you alone I got to go out here in the wilderness got to go out here chop some wood I got to chop wood then I'm going to you and then I'm going to go whoop ass I'm going to carry a log to this no oh shut this off before I die oh I can't do it anymore those movies are great though dude so great a window into time and know a return when it was okay to be ridiculous in film oh yeah man now it's everything gets checked in Balance so much that everything is like has to be proven by the studio back then that was an idea I'm sure he was like w driving around thinking about the fight we'll make a music video they're like great we got an extra 100 Grand to burn this week let's do it I'm thinking we have a time lapse of all the shitty moments in my life all the things where it didn't work out can you guys show uh first time family member died how about uh we go

95:42back to the first time I ever kissed the Adrien okay yeah Rock we have some of our own scenes planned mm that I know my people he does though I mean he's still cranking out action movies he's kicking people's asses and he's in his 70s dude can I tell you the one I did a benefit uh I did like the standup at a at a benefit for Tom Arnold for this thing this charity he runs and Sly was there because they're they've known each other for years and uh as I got off stage I walked past him and I didn't want to like you know I didn't want to be like hey and call attention but as I walked by he goes very very good I was like that's awesome I was like that's enough for me dude very very good I interviewed him once for the UFC there was some thing was going on he was some movie was coming out I forget what movie it was but he wanted he was fun he was easy didn't take him

96:31seriously whatever that is I don't remember I don't think it was I think it was another movie I forget what movie it was but uh he was super like self-deprecating and easy to get along with that's how you stay on Earth man he said something about his mom and that someone yelled something out like someone like cackled him yelled something goes oh there's my mom she's up there like he's quick but he was like a a genuine nice guy like just friendly like easy going like one of the biggest movie stars in the world in the world but like was like hey what's up what's up how you doing it was pretty cool I liked it it was nice that's what we were saying uh before we jumped on that the level of of what Fame means to be an international movie star now has changed so much that like I was in Japan and I'm in Japan and I bring up my Instagram because these young Japanese kids are

97:15wanting to like see my social media and he sees the blue check mark of the verified and he's like famous famous and I'm like no no no no no no dude no no no no I was like they give this to any now and they're all like laughing cuz they're like what what do you do and I'm like uh comedian comedian and their faces were kind of like comedian and one guy goes Will Smith and I go yeah Will Smith that's exact that's exactly it's exactly right but then you realize that's the level of when you say what's famous around the world you're like slide when you say like who was a famous in I don't know if we have like I don't I don't know if the rest of the world knows as many of our stars as they used to it used to be you were an international star and that's what made you a mega star now it's kind of like you can be famous here in film and not really be known at all over there I mean you could

98:06then but there was so I feel like we were pumping out International stars at one point they were like a just a bevy of international action Stars you know what I mean that just became in that era of Schwarzenegger Sly even like we were talking about John Claud bam before this Seagal like all these like Willis like all these Mega International Superstars because the action movies were so big now we've put that into fantasy film so now it's Guardians of the Galaxy now it's any superhero movie that's become it but I I missed the world of like why can't we have an action movie that isn't a comic book H where does that go yeah we would need it would have to be like someone you believe you'd have to be the rock but that's what like he could do it he could do it but why why doesn't it exist maybe people don't want those movies anymore why not they have to

98:52have some sort of a metc they're they're judging this from right like when they're making these movies they I think it's because they made a couple of action hero movies I I I mean they made a couple of comic comic book films and they did so well that now we have a bevy of them because they know that there's such a big market for it but I can't imagine you wouldn't want to see another Die Hard type dude yeah why the not why why haven't they done redone die hard they did they did see there you go yeah but don't who did they redo Die Hard with when did they they didn't redo it they just kept they're still doing it it's oh it's being done right now yeah I think they're even making another one right now who's who's the Die Hard guy Bruce Willis get the out of here Bruce Willis has not kept himself up it looks like he throw a punch his shoulder would blow out ow that really hurts I

99:37mean unless he's been working out since I last checked 2013 and then it says future right here let's see it's oh they started it in 2013 oh that's the last one came out was was it did they try to do a TV show is that what it was what wait a minute they making another one there was a Die Hard in 2013 yeah what with uh Justin long I think was in it and his like about his daughter and what yeah God I'm bad I'm I that doesn't sound at all familiar but I if you had to tell me to and I'm a Bruce Willis fan I think Bruce Willis is awesome but if you had to tell me like when was his last movie I'd be like I assume he's just popping Viagra and shooting loads all over the place I don't know what what is his last movie Good Day to Die Hard A Good Day to Die Hard wow and who's the guy to left is that Kevin Hart no no I don't know who is that dude I've never seen that guy in my life that

100:30was just a guy that was on set did anybody go to see that what did it get on IMDb 14% on Rotten Tomatoes wow very good hey we can you go to Box Office Mojo and look that up will you look it up on Box Office Mojo Box Office Mojo oh no there it was go back sorry go back to the previous page what is Box Office Mojo it'll tell you like budget and it'll tell you what it made here in international where's that look at that down there it says how you know 92 million box office it made 304 million is that what it says wow so it killed it did great probably all all overseas All Foreign sales yeah go to Box Office Mojo it'll show you so maybe he's like one of the few guys left that can still do that yeah you know like Steven Sagal still sells a ton of movies overseas a they do those uh straight to you know straight to video straight to DVD dude he makes tons of

101:19money he they internationally sell the movie before he even makes it do you know that you know he's a Russian citizen I know I love it that's hilarious he's sticking around there you go they gave him a Russian passport there's look at that there's the proof it made 62 million here it made 237 overseas wow International Superstar dude get that paper get that paper Bruce that paper Bruce that's amazing what do you think he walked away with oh man he took 10 up front to make it he probably got a ton of money I don't know how it works points he's probably got 30 30 million out of that maybe was balling out of control kid Bruce hit us up dude yeah he's good friends with d myera is he yeah those two that's so funny I I would love to see just them two and a diner having a conversation I know right just Bruce and damara Damar rera is still doing the damn dude I love

102:10him he did a bunch of episodes on the Showtime show I did did he yeah dude it's so awesome that they got like real Comics man the Showtime show looks great man I love how authentic everybody looks and the the hairstyles and they went with real Comics Al magal you Eric Griffin giron uh um Dom Earl skel does a few popins on it um oh my God I'm I'm draw such a blank there's so many other guys that like came in and left Judy gold yeah that's awesome look at that man that's crazy meliss feel like an extreme amount of responsibility while you were doing this because you're doing a movie that based on the most important comedy club in my opinion ever yeah TV show but yeah yeah I know yeah are you doing a show me the pressure was yeah man I felt the pressure the responsibility was huge wow we premiered last night and it'll air this Sunday and uh Jim Carrey

103:12said some amazing things man yeah that's our cast photo that one that you clicked that one yeah did it feel weird to be on that I mean it must have been like I can tell you from the bottom my honest heart it was the most important thing I've done so far wow dude I mean we were paying homage to the world that that we love and respect so much and it was a big effort on Jim's part and his producing partner Michael agular to like tell real stories a lot of the stories that people will see if you watch the show and I hope you do come from Jim's real life two dudes from Boston moov they live in a dude's Closet in West Hollywood and they used to be a guy that would jerk off and watch Jim change and that's Jim Jim put that story in the show man he wanted all these little great tidbits there's a great moment about joke stealing in there and a huge fist fight that breaks out

103:54that was real from Jim's personal life about guys who used to come in from the radio from Talk Radio in the you know in the morning they come to the club at night come to the store steal the next morning Comics would hear it yeah that's a real common thing yeah man that that was always going on you know what else was going on a big one was uh writers for sitcoms would come yep same and they would uh watch people do sets and then they would wind up putting their their bits in like even in Seinfeld keev one of Kevin James signature bits got used on Seinfeld after he had a bunch of meetings and then they came to see him perform a bunch of like top writers came to see him perform at an NBC showcase it was like when Kevin was uh getting a development deal and they came down and watched him and then like the next season his muffin bit was on a Seinfeld episode he was like what the man

104:42well nowadays they they're blatant they tell you like I I tested for Saturday Night Live and you sign a form that says these characters can be used after the audition whoa and this is crazy I'm not calling out anybody or saying anything but they did there was a character ended up on the show that Vanessa beay did hilariously that I did something similar in my audition I was like damn that was really good wait a minute so you you audition you have a character you audition with yeah I did this character I this fake they can steal that they own that now audition when you audition you surrender the character you man yeah you sign a piece of paper man that's crazy they're not even giving you money and they're stealing your ideas when you get the that that that's the respect that uh SNL has earned in in that Community you you know you don't have that respect it's crazy that's stealing you're

105:25stealing well I signed the form man oh my god dude that's so awful I sign that because because you can almost taste it you know but they're making you sign something saying we're going to steal from you totally that's insane we're going to steal from you we're not going to pay you anything we're going to use this thing it might be a Mike Myers movie someday and you have to say yes sir may have another take it in your take it I took it God it's so crazy I took it man I took it it was a wild process but the fact it's some hugely successful business wouldn't want to compensate people for creating those ideas to fly you out to to show yourself off even if you I mean even if you just don't hire them but you like that character you there should be like an established rate that you have to pay for things but I mean you know and my whole thing is like I'm not saying what

106:11they did was what I did but it was there was just some similarities in in the nuances of the character that I thought were either just you know a Confluence of great ideas but um it is hard you think about that stuff you're like is that is that close to what I did because you know like we said back in the day like our show shows people were blatantly Ste people have been blatantly Stealing In Comedy for ever it's been like the beginning of time and especially in the 70s which I think is what we tried to show was like they would steal these radio guys and show up again and be like hey like it was like it it come on buddy yeah told on the it was one of your jokes from last night we always we always promote you whenever you're in town yeah like like I'm really I'm really lucky that I didn't grow up in generation where you didn't get paid in the sense of like when I remember hearing stories

106:56of guys that would go on the road and then get out of a check you can get still really people get yeah I've heard of people getting Joey Joey Diaz had an experience about a year ago well joy got to with too yeah he called this guy up and started screaming at him and said listen you know you don't pay me he goes I'm going to tell the whole world he goes I'm going to have all my friends tell the whole world and no one's going to work here anymore that's it yeah and he W up getting paid but it took him a while to get paid there's a lot of club Owners are still doing coke isn't that insane I know a guy I know a guy I can't even be around him every time I'm around him he's coked up he's just living it like the old days but here's the thing man it's been a part of it from the beginning of time like from the beginning of when I started doing standup there was a lot of

107:46club Owners that were on coke and they just part noral yeah they partied Nick's comedy stop in Boston it didn't never happened to me cuz I was never a Coke guy but they would offer you if you wanted to get paid in money or Coke I'm not kidding imag any other industry they would pay the comics and cocaine like Lenny Clark has told me about it in great detail and said I'll just take the coke I guess some guys took the Coke can you do a half and half can you do like an eightball and these guys were selling Coke and running comedy clubs that's kind of brilliant yeah I mean there was it was total organized crime it was all organized crime it was just like a level where it was acceptable it wasn't like they were killing people but they were selling Coke yeah but Coke was so okay that it was like n dude no one's totally captured the crazy days of Boston I was a kid back then so I got to

108:36see it really from the outside and it all started before I even started about four years before I started it was at its peak in like 84 yeah those guys were Maniacs out of their minds Maniacs hammered every night on like Mario Joiner was talking about it last night at the store yeah cuz he was hosting the show we were doing and Mario Jordan was like they would just go up there and just get hammered and just be killing killing blacked out crushing blacked out drunk hammered it was a different it was a whole different Groove man now you have to be on your p's and q's man now everyone's got to be real tight I feel like the majority of people in comedy the the longer I've stayed in comedy the more I see people sober now I think a lot of people it's just not people are I feel like there's a lot of there's a lot more clean people working now than people who party I think there's a lot

109:24of people that realize the consequences of partying yeah you can only stay on that train for so long you look at the great ones that got derailed whether it's Cat Williams whether it's Kennison the great ones that have been derailed by cocaine there's there's a ton of them that we know of the cocaine one gets you it ends in a bad way it you go bad your creativity goes away you get paranoid you get tired your act diminishes greatly like Kennison in my opinion is with the best example he's the best example of a guy who at one point in time was just arguably the best ever for like two years nonstop good just a monster a and a and a a thing like no one had seen before like there wasn't a Sam Kennison like an archetype yeah it didn't exist no he was this fat guy had' been over I've been married twice and he just would come out this giant this big energy this this thing

110:21like a human storm comedy but then it do dropped off so radically like Ari was talking about the other night like if you go and watch his stuff after the second special it's like it's just the second special is a big drop off the real is is CD or it wasn't even CD Warner Brothers wouldn't even make it a CD because it was so homophobic they kept it a cassette for real his cassette Louder Than Hell and then his HBO special and don't watch anything after that the HBO special is what I remember seeing as like one of the things where I was like this is insane this is like a madman who's hitting all the marks you know yeah it's like a a smart mad man yes a a genius but he but he didn't it's but he's not but he didn't miss it was weird it was like yeah it's like watching something someone do something brilliantly in sports where you're like everything worked perfectly it was like all the

111:12stars were aligning for him to just chugging on this train of crushing that was crazy to see man and it was like during the Reagan Era where people started to get a little button down yeah like that was like went from Carter to Reagan right so we go from this hippie peanut farmer from Georgia that couldn't get the hostages back from Iran to this movie star with a slick black hair and oh oh it's just like there was he was a part of that yeah I mean there was a part of the whole country was crazy at the time and Kennison came along and he sort of embodied the frustrations that a lot of people fell the timing was perfect perfect but cocaine got him like he wasn't the same guy after that there's this giant drop off in the amount of focus he put on his work yeah well because you become complacent and you also like I think the more money and fame you get I think

112:04unless you have sense sense sense of groundedness and humility around you like friends to be like dude you got to change your game you're up you're slipping you're not prod you're not producing anymore you're not writing you're not developing you're not changing who you are as a comic I think if you don't have that around you if everyone around you is like more Coke dude more that's it no I agree um the train crashes man I don't know Cat Williams but uh I'll tell you what to this day like pimping Chronicles Pimp Chronicles whatever that special is that he did that is a God damn genius amazing it's amazing and apparently he likes to do little now I don't know but I just wish he would clean up he's one of those guys I I look forward to when he puts out yeah cuz it's different crazy just wild yeah he's wild man he's real I mean it's just he's a maniac his

112:59hair is all slick back and sweating like a pig he paused a special to change his clothes cuz he sweat so much that's genius that's how you know you're putting in work he sweat through his clothes you're getting your money he went and did a change and came back out and kept crushing that's how you know you're he put in work yeah and that was like after he had gone through all those canceled shows and all the craziness and like got on stage and yelled at a heckler 5 minutes and then left and everybody wanted their money back and they booed him and still came back and crushed yeah yeah he's good it's that goddamn cocaine though it gets them it gets everybody everybody that we know that never made it I mean how many guys do you know that were funny that never made it that started doing coke a shitload of dudes a shitload not just Coke too but just anything anything anything I mean as

113:43soon as they got into the Party World the hard Party World of like yeah Coke it's got to be Coke it just it just it just snags people God damn people and they disappear man people who love Coke must hate my podcast like he's always on coke you don't even you never even done Coke bro that's the thing about Rogan dude I like him but he's like a about Coke dog Let It Go bro I do a little Coke I do a little Coke every day Apparently that is the best way to get girls to have sex with you though like if you've got some cocaine it's a it's you got to be in the right place where people need cocaine they're not allowed to say no they just say yes they just get crazy and they do Coke I guess it's like a super inhibition lowering thing you know I think the idea is so fun that they're like he can get Coke like anybody can get weed but it's like he can get Coke you're waiting at

114:37the house for the guy to show up guy the guy shows up in a Lamborghini with that music playing in the background there's no easy way out gets out of his car puts the E bra on yo man I got your package you go out you give the money you you hug like a little bit too violently like a little slap the back hug you know that slap the B hug yeah cuz you know that you're dealing in some seriously illegal things that guy knows where you live too how's your sister man she's good bro thanks for asking no no thanks for the coke man no doubt no doubt good oh yo the best Yo next time I got some non some really clean shits not stepped on dog so hit me the up right y next week next week I got a new shipment coming in you got to be careful though don't OD cuz this that strong don't OD dude I don't want that on my conscious be dropping their panties for this bro you got any in the house no all right man I

115:22got to get out of here did you see that that Mary lero lady that uh that kid in school and went to jail and then had a kid with them they just broke up after 21 years together can you believe it this kid finally broke up it's like this is crazy 21 years later he's like that's all it took two decades 21 years this kid has been banging her I got to get the out of here oh you're nuts you me when I was 12 what am I doing here I didn't realize this was super unhealthy all right yeah thanks I got to go I think they have a kid together do they 18-year-old daughter they have an 18y well she's going to be she's GNA have everything in order I'm sure she's going to be the leader of a punk band yeah she be she half her head shaved she'll be wearing Doc Martin stomping around Mary Kayla turn's husband we only split so I could sell pot oh what the I love it I love life life's

116:21beautiful said still happily together and he merely filed for legal separation for May 9th Because he believes it will make it easier for him to get a license to distribute C marijuana cigarettes she's a registered sex offender oh well yeah she has to be right cuz he was underage that's hilarious I bet she's still a freak totally dude I bet she puts like alligator masks on so he's 55 she's 55 they're fine they just got legally divorced so they could uh so they could do this business she s years in prison for that I'm happier for that did she really that's ridiculous wild it's so stupid he was he was in sixth grade what's sixth grade is that 12 12 or 13 Jesus a a DJ in Washington we should go see his shows I was up in Seattle I should have gone up there yeah it's probably awesome it's probably a really good show a firebomb goes off Glitter in the Air it's crazy bro the show is am

117:19wild he knows how a party what do you spin man whatever I'm feeling dog kids love that music when they're on the drugs though D when you're on that Molly you can't escape the beat how many times have you done ecstasy oh ecstasy I've done two or three times two or three MDMA cuz two different things right I think MDMA is ecstasy but the old ecstasy that we did in high school was definitely not what it is now no it was like whatever pill they crushed together from the sink they lied to you yeah that was bad you got lied to in Chicago MDMA was uh MDMA the first time I ever did it was in London and about 10 years ago that was the first time I ever even heard of it because it wasn't Molly didn't no one said Molly but this guy was like Andrew this guy who lived next door was like dude I've got this MDMA dude you've got to try it and I was like all right whatever the is big like

118:16Jamaican British dude I was like all right dude I'll try this we went down by the beach and watch this concert and I was like dude how do I get this all the time he was like it's limited Supply but I've got more for you we did that for like four days straight I was like this is the most fun I've ever had and then I just stopped doing it for years and years and years and I tried it again one more time and that was it never again I only did it once but it was spectacular it's amazing the the the come down though was too strong the cown was devastating I was like this do you get do you get hard crashes when you do shrooms or no no you don't crash at all no I mean I feel weird sometimes I but I'm always so belittled not belittled so obliterated by the experience it's always like I'm trying to process it they're like I'm barely aware of my physical state I'm almost like eating

119:03just to like just because I have I know I have to get calories in like sustenance should be in my body at this point let me just figure out what the just happened you know it's always like oh yeah I knew I knew but I didn't know like I kind of I needed to see it but I knew my crash my crashes were for some reason they used to be terrible I used to come down off mushrooms and I would feel miserable was it always every time you did it almost man did you ever think that like maybe one thing that does happen apparently is that sometimes people grow mushrooms and oddly enough the mushrooms have fungus that develops on them and you can get sick from the Fungus and then sometimes people say they have like these they have these almost like hangover like feelings because of that I have read that I've never had a hangover I mean I just I just remember a lot of the crashes being

119:44like a bummer like I was like this is for some reason acid was the first time I ever did acid was had like I felt like even when I was off of it I was it was great I didn't really didn't with me yeah I I did acid for the first time last year like was it last year six months ago something like that did you like it yeah yeah but it didn't um it didn't it didn't crash me I I felt weird when it was over I didn't I just I would just didn't want to I just I did it and I didn't want to do it again I remember doing it and being like H I just didn't want to do it again they say the thing about ecstasy though is if you take 5 HTP you got to take that like while you're on it cuz it helps rebuild your serotonin so it balances it out yeah cuz it's the building blocks for serotonin take that and it'll uh it'll help you uh boost yourself back up when you come through

120:31because once you come through because it gives you this giant burst of Serotonin you feel so wonderful but then it depletes it takes a while before it spools back up the 5htp Apparently can help mitigate that that sounds like printer ink yeah it does I get the 5htp I guess that's so funny there's like a science now staying healthy while you're on drugs I know when I first started doing drugs it was like figure it out dude might chew your lip off uh you got to drink applesauce home remedies like you ever have menudo uhuh menudo is the Mexican oh yes oh yeah I'm like I'm like not what's I thought it's a drug no I'm talking you're talking about Mano yeah Mano is uh the Mexican hangover cure it's great you can get it there's a legit Mexican joint down the street legit pork right it's pork base isn't it it's a bunch of in there they have Tri chiso and there's

121:20there's like stomach like like pieces of like stomach in there that's it's it's like this brown soup that's chickpeas in it or not brown it's like a reddish BR stew soup like a stew it's goddamn delicious I love it if you can get it from a real place like a real Mexican joint that has real menudo woo what's the spot up the street should I go to I'll show you yeah you got show I got I got to I don't I know exactly where it is but I don't know the name of it something something takaria oh it's so good dude Everyone's Watching Mexican TV you go in there everyone's speaking Spanish they look at you like what the you how'd you find this place what's up P yeah you're like hey fellas they barely speak English barely when you're ordering food barely and they have to ask you like two or three times and you have to explain to them and then you know you could try try to like

122:07you'll be embarrassed try to say it with with a a Spanish flare yeah but it's so good man they have horchata those big those big her Chata Vats I love the Vats yeah that's that's if you yeah that's if you're going to be a rich Mexican you want an horchata bad at your house that's you don't think Gabriel elus has one he's got a giant one like an oral barrel and he wears the helmet with two spouts every morning when he walks around with it a horchata helmet excuse me where's my horchata helmet the FL the the the fluff the fluff's got it he's like taking time off that guy I mean he's he's a machine he's been doing it for so long I think he probably needs a little bit of a break right I think he said he just wants to do a bunch of now just going to have some fun just party just do F off gu made so much money he's got all of it people don't even realize

122:57how much money that dude made but that's why he's so good at what he does cuz he keeps it on the low he doesn't act like he has money he doesn't seem he doesn't come off that way yeah he's real low to the ground with that stuff he was doing so many shows he has the record number of uh shows that were sold out at the ice house he did like some crazy run where he was doing three four shows a day it was something on the W how how many was it what' you say Jamie he's back he's back on the RO fuing so he took the time off and jumped back in fluffy is back oh he's got a new special oh look at all those dates huh he's hust dam look at all those dates every day I'm hustling fluffy fan life dude he's connected bro I'm sorry for what I said when I was hungry damn he's going to Norway and Sweden Estonia United Kingdom Germany Belgium Netherlands holy Finland Vegas

123:53Finland swed got a whole European leg of his tour holy where's R Park California where's Ron Park ronard Park good question it's a place white people shouldn't go probably I'm say I'm G to say that soue falls back on the road baby um when is your Showtime special it's coming out very soon right tomorrow oh Jesus Christ San tomorrow June 2nd we release tomorrow baby what's it called HomeField Advantage oh Jesus you do it in Chicago did it back home at the Vic theater where I used to go watch bands play when I was in high school it was so surreal dude wow that feel look at you can looking cute man strong beard strong beard I was just when I was shooting the show oh look at that do you know what that is go back two pictures you know what that's mean paying tribute to somebody do you recognize that picture no or what I'm doing no Carol Bernett oh wow you say that yeah dude Carol

124:45Bernett used to touch her ear for for her grand for her family wow this is a trip for her family she used to touch your ear her grandmother was like touch your ear for me well her grandma was like say say hi to Nana on TV and she's like I can't do that right she's like they'll fire me and she's like I promise I'll show I'll do something I'll think of something that you know like as a shout out to you and she told her like you know a short time later she was like I'm going to touch my ear you'll know I'm thinking of you so she used to do that TV all the time to appease some annoying family members yeah man you got to how about you realize N I got I'm doing up there okay I'm working I'm goddamn Carol brunett went to a restaurant recently a couple years ago I was at a restaurant she was there it's weird it's like she was just hanging out at this restaurant

125:26dinner with some guy kicking yeah she's I think she's she was genius that show Carol that show was a great show she was brilliant everything about her was like so inventive of that time period I can I appreciate that kind of so much well you have to also have to realize how crazy it was that someone was willing to invest in a woman running a show like that it was unheard of the Carol Bernett show and it was a sketch comedy show unheard of yeah I mean man look at she's doing tuing on her ear yeah yeah it's kind of crazy man like at the time so powerful man how few women were like that at the time that had that kind of poll I mean Lucy Lucy was the only one of of that prior era that had massive influence in Hollywood yeah who could say anything and be like this is how it is yeah and Studios were like uhhuh their show was called I Love Lucy I mean Jesus it was it couldn't

126:18have been any other way you know what I mean for her it was like she's like I am star I'm going to be the star of the show I want the intro to be my face and then show Ricky Ricardo I don't even know Ricky Ricardo's name how about that who's that Ricky Ricardo guy what was his name his name is uh exactly that's what I'm saying that's so embarrassing I do know who it is but everybody knows who Lucio ball is what's that dude's name I honestly thought it was Ricky Ricardo that's not his name bro that's the TV name Desi Ares okay I kind of I knew that I knew that I just forgot it you're allowed to forget like that but I wouldn't forget Lucio ball no can't good goddamn show back then and that was back when a white girl was allowed to date a Cuban Cubans were were very white back then well that was the only kind of yeah it was the only minority she could date on TV yeah like

127:08if it was like if she had a show called I love Mexicans and she was uh dating a Mexican guy not a Cuban guy Cubans are like from Spain it's like a Spaniard it was it was thought of as a different thing Desi Desi AR now like a handsome bastard back then he was man you think he ever banged Lucy sh oh no disrespect they were married I'm saying do you think he banged her though no they were married in real life and then they worked together on TV they were they were wow look at that wow the hey day back in the day man you ever watch old TV shows just to just to get a glimpse of what it was like to be back in that era my old man love Andy Griffith is favorite show in the history of Television my parents watch Andy Griffith every day oh God they're obsessed they love that my dad loves that they long for Nostalgia he he just thinks that like that's such an iconic period of time

128:05when like comedy was pure and clean and the jokes were about life situations that were there's a town drunk and there's a town you know what I mean it's kind of like everything was such a setup but meanwhile behind the scenes they were just as freaky back then if not more freaky dude Don KN used to used to uh stick uh the cop baton up his own ass right before they shot every day are you sure nope look at that picture that's the Baton going in his ass that's why Andy's laughing did you ever um hear The Fatty Arbuckle story Fatty Arbuckle was the big comedian from like the 1930s and the 1940s and they had some girl that they were doing something with and someone put a bottle inside of her like in in her vagina and it broke and she died yeah she died yeah there was something along those lines a bit there was a bit where it was like we're going to put a bottle in your P I don't think

129:01so I think they were partying I think they were going too hard and uh Fatty Arbuckle was a huge star at the time yeah and when that woman died I don't know if he was I don't know if he was uhgh he got charged with manslaughter yeah but was whether or not he was convicted I don't if he was convicted but his his career was over and then it all dried up for him I don't even know if he did it you know I mean I'm I'm not really sure he was probably around for the party most likely yeah hotel room yeah she sneezed and the bottle broke there he is Arbuckle was charged with manslaughter and endured not one not two but three trials for the alleged crime I'm not going to go into the nitty-gritty of what went on in each trial but try to imagine the mismanagement and publicity akin to the OJ Simpson trial and you'll be getting close well then he should have got into it I mean well who knows I don't

129:58know Court TV yeah there was no court TV coverage but there was a thriving tabloid press and no shortage of bombastic rhetoric the assistant prosecutor for one of the trials Milton Milton o uren h became known for his florid damning description of Arbuckle's lifestyle to ITT a Babylonian Feast was in process in progress there the the defendant had Sumptuous quarters with his friends food was spread Wine and Liquor were served and this modern Bahar I don't know what that means Bahar Bazar Bazar Bazar sat upon his throne surrounded by his Lords and their ladies there was music feasting singing and dancing how do you know were you there yeah he he just said above he didn't want to get into details and then he explained a bunch of a modern B shazar king of Babylonia sundered amidst his decadence this is some Game of Thrones ass doomsday stuff right there that's a that is an

130:58interesting thing that a prosecutor could do back then that could make that sort of like ridiculous description of the events that took place like you weren't there yeah you just you really you actually do not know you actually do not know that this is what happened that's a that's a big fish story you know so did he wind up going to jail uh looking at the rest of this you know how many people have stuck bottles up people's and they didn't die and they went they read that story I did it this morning I did it if you got like one of those Mexican Coke bottles those real thick ones those are hard to break those are hard to break you'd have to throw her against the wall or something yeah if she had a that was so strong it could break one of those bottles it could probably endure the cuts too oh yeah like a a dense it killed his career he third trial he uh just pretty much

131:47lost left Hollywood or he shunn by Hollywood and could no longer find work is that crazy that he was acquitted right got so he was acquitted and uh it's still yeah I guess back then that was it it was it son and there was only one machine you know there was no internet back then nope you he couldn't had a YouTube page could have made his own YouTube page you see uh faty arbo put out a special on ceso man it's pretty good it's on epics but they're going to sell it to Netflix in five years how's it working for Showtime it was good dude they've got good show man they did me right I will say doing this special this Friday and then the show comes out on Sunday so it's like this weekend they're going they're pairing it together and I they were great they did great by me man I can't say anything negative about that the network is the right now billions is good for them they still are kicking

132:37out Shameless people love Shameless still bloodline I mean there's a bunch of really good shows yeah show times resurfaced as of the premium cable network that it's wanted to be for a long time yeah I did uh a Netflix special in 205 and in 2006 Showtime aired it they they've put together some good comedy specials well they have the Netflix and Showtime have have some kind of deal because a lot of the times your Showtime ends up on Netflix they they buy out the rights of that that would be smart you know if they did that that would be smart Ave it's a good move for everybody you know I mean and I hope they also have it available like it's easy to watch online you know where they make it with very few hurdles to be able to watch it online yeah cuz you got to give it to people man at some point well not only that more people find out how good it is more people watch it you know whether

133:25it's your show or whether it's your standup yeah you know the more more more stuff that gets out there better it is right absolutely in this crazy day and age I hope yeah you've come along with the golden age of The Comedy Store you know that right it's wild man yeah the boom this is the boom right now we're going through it is the bubble Gonna Pop I don't think so cuz there's so much there's so many funny comedians like guys like yourself guys there's a lot of guys out there that are really good and that are coming up that are really good there's real good comedy going on right now I know it's crazy I think it's breeding really good comedy I think because there's so much great competition and there's so many good people I think it's breeding to people to be stronger and stronger sometimes I see guys when I'm like God damn they're getting so strong

134:07well it's like you see really good stuff around you you know you show up one night and Chappelle goes up and then Chris Rock goes on after him like you're seeing this stuff on a regular basis and the like the quality of the comedy that you see is very high and guys coming up the one you know when I first started the store in '94 it was a dead zone it was just a terrible time it was like right after the kennes and boom it ended Kennison left there at like ' 86 yeah you know and then by the time I came around it was eight years later Kennison was dead and the place was weird nobody wanted to be there it was weird you know it was weird there for a long time man especially in terms of like uh talent coming up you know the talent coming up back then was just like it was really poor is this the best you've ever seen it since you started 100% for me it's not even close for you some guys say it

134:54was even better early on they they say it was even better like um in the 80s they said like before like the Kennison era like um dama rare especially he says that like there was a time when they were doing three shows in the main room two shows in the O and they were just rotating just yeah but we're pretty close to that now I was just going to say that's we're that's we're knocking on that door that's not we do two two shows in the main room all the time on the weekends we do two shows in the o all the time on the weekends and sometimes I've done four sets in a night there where I did two shows in the main room one show in the belly room and one show in the O that's awesome crazy the belly has developed itself into like a real great room there's just so much creativity and fun going on there that's what it is but you know what man The Improv is not bad

135:39right now too The Improv has been really good too it's like comedy is just like experiencing a cool little bump yeah it's wild I think people don't know how lucky they are in La it's wild man people people live in LA and they're like yeah how many guys are on tonight it's like well they're all going to be amazing so stick around because everyone you're going to see is going to be a good comic just a couple that suck let's be honest sure it's a few sure there's going to be a few there's a lot of uh comedy tourism too people are coming here from Ireland Scotland andu English it's it's strange like we we flew over to watch the store like what weird I hope that I hope our show helps that too push the idea of the store being just another iconic piece that people don't know about you know for people that don't give a about standup when they see this I think it'll be more like oh

136:28that's kind of cool I'd like to go see more of that now are you touring are you going around the world what are you doing um right now because we're kind of waiting to hear what Showtime says if we're going to do this again then I have to cancel a bunch of dates but next week I go to Austin Cap City then I go Chicago Denver just for laughs and Montreal Raleigh so I'm touring a little bit here into the summer but if we have to shoot again I have to cancel a bunch different dates no kidding huh Showtime waits till the first episode airs to release any official announcements so when is the first episode air Sunday baby so if it does well on Sunday they make a choice right then and there takes about you know it takes a whatever a little bit of manipulation time of them deciding what they want to do but yeah usually shortly after the first episode they talk about what's going to happen

137:12so did you get a chance to watch it we did we saw it last night last night was a premiere for like internal for critics and and now was happy Jim Carrie said some amazing stuff he's the executive producer of The Show for I didn't I don't know if I said that earlier but he said some really dope man he said how much this meant to him and how how people don't really know some of the the true history of what that world was like to performed for for no money and that that where there was one there was one way in was Johnny Carson it was like you get on Carson it was like you are on the moon dude wow and he talked about how a lot of crit critics I guess got you know they got episodes a couple weeks ago and he's said a lot of you guys have been saying the word dark it's not a comedy he's like we never sold it as a comedy never once did we promote it as a comedy it's a dramatic show

138:03about the world of Comedy is that funny sometimes yeah there's some really funny moments on our show but it's about the world that exists it's about what it's like to be 23 and hungry and poor as and trying to get and trying to get stage time and trying to figure out what you're what you're doing who's beating you and it's just about life the life of a standup the life of a hustling hungry angry angsty jealous standup because we all go through that dude I'm excited I want to watch it right now it's dude I really hope people enjoy it I think the first episode is powerful as we have some dude the the pilot is insane we have um Robert Forester Kathy morotti from Raging Bull Melissa Leo is the the the the matriarch of the show she she plays gold who runs our Comedy Club um who is a variation of mity but you know she wouldn't say that we we're on our own space um Ari Greener Michael angarano

139:01there's some just bangers on the show people that are they act their mind out that are just really good man and I'm jealous you I sit along with those people and I'm like me these people are really good actors that's awesome yeah Melissa was Melissa was the best work she wanton a Academy Award man she won an Oscar for the fighter so it's like being around a human that won an Oscar is crazy wow wow it's it's wild cuz I never Kathy Mor already was in Raging Bull man she was also in the Dice Clay show you ever that that uh what is it what was the name of the show bless this house bless his house yeah yeah that's right she was dice's wife Alfred Molina you know him Alfred Molina he's the he's in it too I mean we have theyve they pulled out a few big names man did you always want to act or did you want to do standup or did you want to do both oh I when I went to school I went to

139:44school to to write to do journalism in English and I knew I wanted to write and perform but I was a about performing in school so did a a few plays cuz I really wanted to be on stage but I didn't like the idea of plays I just wanted to get on stage to like get my comfort level up and the and the training wheels yeah dude and one of the one of the teachers um pulled me aside one day and she was like you know you could actually be a good actor if you didn't just around when you got on stage and I was like well I I really want to around on stage she's like well then why don't you go do that for a living and no I was like I'm going to try and I knew I want to do stand up so bad and Ive when I moved to LA I started in LA and I was like I'm either going to sink or swim and when did you start what year 20 I moved here 2000 at the end of 2006 I lived on a guy's lazy boy in Long

140:30Beach wow and I used to drive up my buddy's truck every single night i' drop him off at the casino he was a professional Gambler I drop him off the casino take his truck cuz I didn't have car or money do mics go to the store and you know get intimidated uh learn some lessons and then drive back home pick him up and we fell us you know get get a burrito and do it all over again that's wild man so you started really coming to the store when I was gone yeah it was like 2007 yeah you weren't around but your legacy was there you know what I mean like it was like we all knew those that came before us and those that we talked about but it was like I was right there when you were when you had kind of left that left that world a little bit but it's wild because it was like I hated the store when I first started dude 2006 2017 was awful the people above us I didn't none of the

141:18older Comics were that nice the vibe was negative as there wasn't a lot of crowds the open mics were brutal they were miserable they barely got watched you know it's just so many negative things about that place at the time that I was we were going through it and then it slowly kind of turned into this you know what we've seen now which is just amazing what we see now it's crazy you pull into the parking lot it's jammed the hallways are jammed with people and it makes me smile from ear to ear weird right isn't it weird like it's a different thing I've been I've been there since 94 man it's never been like this this is a totally different thing it's just you know what it still does to me this is a truth you kind of get desensitized to but seeing my name up on the up on the board when it's a packed night it still gets me like I still get excited I'm like that's cool I'm a part

142:07of this moment in time in comedy at that club in my opinion the club it's just something else man there's something powerful as that's sometimes I walk to the club cuz I live in the neighborhood and I like to walk instead of drive cuz it helps me get out of my brain and uh every time I walk up that you know and I see my name up there there's like a overwhelming feeling the moment I see it it's like this is you know soak it in a little bit cuz it's doesn't last forever it's nice to have a place that's like that too like to just have one place that stands out as something that means more than just a comedy club it's like it's it's it's an iconic thing yeah there's there's something about that place like we're at the store it's bigger than comedy man it's it's it's it's it's like a it's something big it's something big it's something special man well Paulie and I were

142:59talking about this and I told him that your mom's one of the most important people ever in comedy period like ever one of the most influential humans in the in in the comedy world in the world of what we know today as standup comedy yes sure is like without her like stop and think about what other comedy club owner has had the kind of influence even remotely similar to what she's had I would know none of the above I mean I mean I I guess the only person that you could bring into that namesake maybe Bud Friedman from The Improv maybe because he did even e The Improv and the monacle and everything like that but I don't think in the hardcore sense it's even close won't be the same no but but but yeah what she did was shape and revolutionize the business that you know today she knew how to do it too leave it up to the comedians leave them alone and then also give them hard spots

143:51for work for it that was that's the best part about that club you think someone's funny good put them on after dice or put them on after you know whoever the it was at the time that was killing see how funny they are after Richard PRI exactly yeah see how funny they are after someone just destroys you just got to go up to this Wasteland of the the audience that's such a testament about that club dude it's what they've always done dude I I ate plates of in that place there's just no way around it following every everybody following anybody's I followed prior for five weeks when when PRI was in a wheelchair so they would have to carry him to the stage it was it was dark it you know would be really funny if if you had to go on you had to carry him off and then do your set they were like start it start it from the crowd carry the legend yeah it was uh it's but that

144:41that philosophy that she had that make you work for it make you sink or swim yeah it's so important CU if people that we know to this day that are scared to have tough spots we know those people totally they will they see somebody like Joey Diaz in the lineup and they're like I'm going to go for a drive I'll I'll be back in a little bit they'll let somebody else take their spot and they come in and they check oh oh is uh he up oh I missed my spot am I on next I thought you were just here where'd you go yeah you hid from Joey Diaz the the the only way to go up after Joey Diaz is to is to just ride the light yeah you got to ride the wave you got to you have to enjoy him you have to have fun I love watching him yeah but that's what I'm saying like the problem with comics when it comes to those sort of situations is you see someone killing and for some

145:27reason you think that's taking away from your ability to be funny it's a weird it's the opposite yes they want you to win with someone let them know that you're there to win again instead of well I can't follow that I'm not going to talk about what Joey is talking about this is going to be disappointing don't get your hopes up yeah oh well good I'm glad you set yourself up yeah you also should be going up laughing like it should be fun that something happens to some comedians along the line where they stop being fans of Comedy like why did you get into this in the first place didn't you like watching it right you going to stop watching it now that you're a pro that's crazy it wasn't because of uh all the billions of dollars that you thought you were going to make you know what I mean nobody got in and was like dude I can't wait to make so much bank on this yeah no one's getting into

146:12comedy for that although it can be done you know if you're like Kevin Hart it can be done but that's not why you get into it but it's like what we were talking about ear it's like people that are trying to get the Limelight it's that weird depressing Thing versus someone who's just like I'm just trying to do my best just trying to trying to put out my best my best standup product I just want to pump out what I'm proud of just Hammer that want to punch him in the head does the uh does the Showtime special have your your rock bit the bit on the Rock it's on it's on Showtime right now on the South by Southwest tour that I did they do the behind the scenes scen of South by Southwest and I did a bit at the Showcase for South by Southwest and I put it up on there is it in your Showtime special though it's not dude it's just on that how is that possible because I did that first and

146:59Showtime put that up and I so what I know I should have done it again God I know oh that bit so good I should have done it again I thought of you actually that's really I thought of you I was like God I should have done that Joe I bet you Joe Joe would have said I should dude I've told so many people about that bit that's a funny bit dud but the beauty is it links to it so it's on Showtime so they can watch my other set and all that stuff that's another 15 minutes that I didn't put in my special that I did at South by oh really yeah I really like get that on YouTube somebody somebody somebody knows how to strip things down around Rock no what is that say no more is that first album that's my old album when did you put out an album what year was this it was two years ago that was my first album that I put out say no more Andrew Santino say no more that's not it let's let's bring

147:48this home so um so the show starts Sunday that's when it first airs I'm dying up here starts Sunday on Showtime and uh if you're a fan of Comedy we definitely want that to keep going so let's let's try to support that thing and Andrew Santino's comedy special called home field advantage comes out this Friday tomorrow baby dude you're one of my favorite up and cominging guys I think you're a hilariously talented guy means a lot coming from you that means a ton dude thank you brother my man all right folks uh we'll be back tomorrow with Brett Weinstein and Brett Weinstein is that College Professor that is being kicked out of school because he's been forced out of school because they actually closed Evergreen College down today because of threats the students have taken over the college and he was forced out because he wasn't willing to participate in a white

148:34stayhome day they wanted all white people all people of white privilege to stay home and he was like that's ridiculous I'm not going to not teach because I'm white and this guy's like a super Progressive guy too which is really crazy they're attacking him they're screaming in the hallways hey hey ho ho This Racist teacher has got to go They're calling him racist we are we are almost at the breaking point of political correctness talk to Brett Weinstein tomorrow about that and he's also a brilliant Professor with a lot of other important stuff to talk about so we'll see you soon byebye dude that was awesome