Christopher Ryan

00:00do dooo 5 4 3 2 1 young Jamie gave me the fake gun pointy finger so we're live Chris Ryan how are you brother good to see you man live I'm live it's good to be live Joe you haven't gotten any of this interdimensional child molester weed yet I've been probed I don't know who was doing it but somebody was probing me interdimensionally I'll tell you that we were just about to talk about getting Alex Jones High on the podcast before we started and I said save it you got to save that well see I'm not that tuned into who he is I I just hear you know occasionally Alex Jones is this right-wing conspiracy guy and I never listen to him so I saw he was on your show and I was working at home doing some around the house so I put it on YouTube so I could actually see him like doing this taking his things off the headphones on and off and oh my God and like for the first hour hour and

00:52a half I was like this guy about half of what he says actually kind of makes sense to me and he's obviously really smart like high IQ off the charts no doubt but then he would just Veer off occasionally like and the more weed and whiskey got involved the more it was just like this is performance art this is just nuts this is beyond nuts once he start right right before the podcast started man I want to get a drink and he went went into there and he he he had some whiskey did he have some whisky before I got here I think might have been right as you got here right as I got so I was already here and he's well before we get started let me get let me get a drink real quick and he went back and I had a drink with him I'm like listen I'm not going to let him drink alone we're going to do this right but it was a dangerous proposition because Eddie Bravo was here and Eddie Bravo is

01:42Mexican and uh Joey Diaz says that Mexicans are basically uh Native Americans which he's right you know like there's NE there's Mexicans that were Native Americans that bred with the Spanish you would know more about this having lived in Spain and so that's why yeah so bre with Mexicans and Spaniards I'll breed with anyone well not breed but attempted breeding I've gone through the motions yeah but you know they look like some of them look like people from Spain and some of them look like Native Americans it's kind of interesting like Mexico is a kind of really diverse sort of a genetic line um but so you know the old stereotype about Native Americans that you know you get them drunk and the Indian goes crazy well Eddie Bravo who's Mexican Joey Diaz is always saying you get him drunk that Indian comes out and that is exactly what happened so we got Eddie drunk and

02:38he just went off the rails with he thinks the government's spraying in the sky and he's been saying it forever so so much so that he's constant he's got like this confirmation bias thing where he's constantly looking to confirm so he just like had this agenda that he had to talk to Alex Jones even after he talked about interdimensional child molesters right and Obama's mother being a CIA sex worker he's so crazy oh he's awesome but I think people got a chance to see what I see in him because like everybody's like how could you be friends with Alex Jones I'm like I'm telling you he's a great guy he's a great guy he's a lot of fun and he's right about a lot of well the thing all right somebody emailed me this morning and they're like uh you know because IID said I tweeted like hey this guy's actually making sense and they were like dude he's like a he denies the Sandy Hook massacre is that

03:29true I don't know is that true that's horrible if that's true that's it I mean that's the kind of thing that for me it's like if he's denying that then that guy he's saying you know Obama's mother was a CIA sex worker that's just funny but the I mean I I don't know you know what I think this is my my take on him and I like I said I love this guy dearly um I feel like he's a high high power Corvette engine yeah but some of the spark plugs connected so like the Obama's wife is a CIA you know that that Obama's mama is a CIA sex slave and Sandy Hook and we've got the documents there's a few of those things that get through where maybe if he had someone next to him going let's look at this objective right isn't it possible that this could be the case or isn't it possible that that could be the case and it's the opposite what he's got is millions of people

04:22saying yeah give us more that right you know people love conspiracy theories they love them they love them and you know here see this is where I was I was surprised to be agreeing with him because because we do live in a conspiracy it is a conspiracy modern civilization is a lie so I agree that you know where he's saying like you know we're being he was talking about sort of I think he gets into lizard people and that kind ofit I don't think he does no he doesn't get into lizard people that's David Ike oh okay I I get into uh super organisms like I think we're embedded in a superorganism you and I've talked about this before I think and that's why we as a species are doing things that are detrimental to our own interests as individual human beings because we are embedded in the superorganism just like our bacteria is embedded in us and you know do you think the superorganism the

05:18Earth itself like what do you no I think it's it's technology me too yeah yeah it's so uh I mean you and I and Duncan talked about this a bunch when we were doing the shrimp parade thing you know like cuz I see I see it as the end of humanity and that is a negative thing because I kind of like I like the way we lived for 200,000 years embedded in the environment like other animals and pretty happy and living in the moment and all that you know yeah uh whereas Duncan thinks it's great that we're spreading out into the universe and you know even if we stop being humans to do that which is yeah it's a it's a fascinating conversation so anyway I'm crazy too is my point right so I think there's a certain certain amount of craziness that's uh that's certainly called for I don't think you're crazy I think you're looking at like you're extrapolating you're just

06:07looking at what's going on and I mean it's really clear what you're saying is absolutely correct we're not operating in the best interest of the species right if we continue did you see this new crack in in the anartica holy it's grown over the last couple of months by like a mile and that thing's like the size of Delaware or something enormous and if it breaks off foxville just gigantic floating Iceberg like the size of a state that might just you know head to Hawaii and crash into it look at this shocking animation reveals how massive how a massive Antarctic crack has grown 17 miles in the last two months hold on scroll back and it's inevitable go back uh and experts say it's now inevitable that it will create one of the biggest icebergs ever seen holy inevitable the size of Jamaica oh my God oh my God look at it oh Jesus Christ yeah it's so scary it would be so

07:06scary to see like a floating state in the ocean and Fukushima the radiation's worse than ever ever yeah and they don't know what to do they have no idea how to contain it not all problems are solvable no yeah well that Fukushima scares the out of me because they don't really know how to shut off a lot of those ancient power plants the ones that they first created essentially they just have to keep running like the let yeah whoever the let them do that is so crazy they don't know how to shut them off well see so much of technology is based on this idea that you know when we need when we Face the problem we'll have an answer to it you know like dis disposal of nuclear waste right well we'll figure that out we'll shoot it into space or we'll they kind of have they've kind of figured out a way to turn nuclear waste into batteries they turn it into diamonds that last for like

07:54they embedded into diamonds and it can last what was it the the technology the batteries last thousands of years really oh it's amazing and well let's get on that well there was uh who which podcast was it that we were doing where someone was talking about a young scientist do you remember who it was we they were talking about a young scientist that has these uh incredible ideas a t talk about it yeah I was there I met him that was the one I did in 2012 or 11 he he does this little reactor in the backyard what's J we've done too many podcasts yeah but it was it was fairly recently just go over the fairly recent podcast and vice did a thing on him that's what it was Shane Smith there you go bam perfect it is yeah Shane Smith from Vice yeah um so maybe he's right or maybe people are right that we will come up with technology that's going to be able to figure out a way to

08:43solve these problems well but it doesn't see that's the thing here we are Fukushima we don't have the technology we don't know how to solve it and now's when we need it you know or a year ago or you know and dump we've been radi Diamond batteries making good use of nuclear waste so they're going to have these Diamond batteries that last for thousands of years which is really incredible because what Shane Smith was saying is essentially we have enough nuclear waste to power the Earth for thousands of years power civilization like we can literally stop we can stop all production of batteries and all the different things that we're doing coal but here's where we get into conspiracy again they won't let us do it they'll shut that down cuz you know we'll lose jobs like right now they're trying to open coal mines again for sake you know who's they coal miners coalmine uh unions and coal mine

09:36presidents and the guy you know Exxon that guy from Exxon who's going to be Secretary of State Tillerson wonderful that's the guy who said what's this point of saving the Earth if humans have to suffer is that what he said yeah smart guy what a ridiculous person anyway so I don't want to drag us down depr we're not this is not depressing you I think think we're right though that what you're saying about technology and about we're serving technology I mean I've been saying this for a long time that I essentially think that what we're doing is giving birth yeah we're we're a larva form yeah we're like some sort of a butterfly that's going to you know emerge or you know we will be a butterfly and we're a caterpillar right now yeah and we're creating iPhones and I'm a caterpillar going God damn it I I like this caterpillar stage but I don't want to lose it don't you think those

10:27single- celled organisms like guys what are we doing and we're branching out we're joining together with other cells that man I like being by myself I like being essentially Immortal Immortal single cell squid it could be but you know some when you're your uh advancing stage requires the destruction of your entire environment and all the other species as well that's kind of it is well I don't know if it's all the species I think rats will be fine if you watch that Netflix documentary on rats yeah no I I saw you posted some and I was like yeah I don't want to see that Jesus it is amazing it is a no rats will be fine Keith Richards will be fine yeah yeah cockroaches but I mean 25% of the species have gone extinct in the last generation something like that well that always happens though see this is not not at this rate no I mean this is a mass extinction event but there's always

11:19been mass extinction events there's been a ton of them and there's 90% of everything that's ever lived is dead everything that ever living organism but that's obscuring the the reality right the the rate of Extinction right now due to human interventions is higher than it's been in probably hundreds of millions of years young Jamie can look that U the last the last major Extinction event was you know hundreds of millions of years ago I think it was 65 million years ago I think it was a dinosaurs I think it was the the what what killed off the dinosaurs and there was also a major Extinction event in North America that coincided with the end of the Ice Age about 10,000 oh right which they attributed to humans no no they don't anymore uh well some people do but what they're thinking now um due to a lot of um geological data is asteroidal impacts oh where Randle

12:06Carson is he on that yeah I never bought that human thing I think this whole man the hunter cuz like they didn't even have bows and arrows they have addal adles right which are cool they're cool pretty cool invention Good luck killing a saber-tooth tiger with that exact the last ones too they're like five left and you're going to hunt them down and kill them I don't think so there just wasn't enough people here to do that right and it's much more likely considering the fact they found these essentially like graveyards filled with woolly mammoths that died instantaneously the the asteroidal impact Theory also a lot of um you know the big game di the the giant uh carnivores the big uh giraffes and all that that was here but also a lot of shellfish went extinct at the same time and snails and things like that here we go extinctions during human era worse than thought the gravity of the

12:55world's current Extinction rate becomes a becomes clear upon no knowing what it was before people came along a new estimate finds a species die off as much as 1,000 times more frequently nowadays than they used to that's 10 times worse than the old estimate of 100 times o oh that's not good and that's three years ago this is a three-year-old article isn't that funny like three years ago people like yeah this shit's old bro shit's from September bro isn't it funny like any we're moving at such a fast rate that our minds are kind of tuned into that and when anybody someone shows you something it's from a year ago you're like bro you're quoting a year old stuff tell me about it I'm trying to write a book like talk about an ancient technology you know it's like I'm trying not to refer to papers that were published 10 years ago but you know how can you not I mean is that crazy 10

13:45years ago is nothing yeah yeah I mean Darwin was a long time ago it's like what we're looking at is this weird accelerated existence and it's it's happening right in front of and we've sort of acknowledged it but we're not recognizing it we've acknowledged it well we can't comprehend it no like we're living in a world we can't comprehend which again gets back to this whole hunter gatherer thing like they lived in a world they understood right you know this whole like we we assume the generational uh misunderstandings or sort of common human behav human experience but if you're a hunter gather your parents and grandparents lived in the same world you live in and they do now I mean you you saw that recently uncontacted tribe like recently Ed tribe in Brazil yeah I mean it's incredible they they're they're live they're a they're a time capsule they're living

14:34the way people lived 100 thousand years ago it's amazing it's really cool it's really the pictures are amazing see these people pointing bows and arrows at helicopters like what have you ever heard there's a great book called at play in the fields of the Lord by Peter mat I've heard of it I've never read it it's a beautiful book man it's a really good film too darl Hannah John Lithgow Kathy Bates amazing cast um but but uh it's about it's a novel but it's about this uh these two guys oh Tom weights is one of the actors they play Pilots they're like Smugglers whatever and they get hired to go in and bomb this uncontacted tribe before the missionaries make contact with them because once they're contacted then all their land gets set aside as a reserve and this corrupt politician wants to log in and mine and you know all this so he hires these two Nar do Wells to go

15:26in and bomb them well and uh I mean I'm not ruining the story this is like the first 20 Pages you get the setup and what happens is they they uh they go out and they sort of fly over the first day and they see they see the clearing in the jungle and all the Indians run into the jungle and then they're sort of flying low they're maybe th feet up and this one Warrior runs into the clearing and fires an arrow at the airplane and they're laughing like this guy thinks he's going to shoot down an airplane with an arrow you know and they go back to the village and one of the pilots it's someway and um forget the other actor but he plays a Navajo and they're like Vietnam vets buming around South America with their plane right and they're back in the the village and they get shitfaced and then the Tom weights character goes to bed and the other guy is still hanging out in this little bar

16:14and somebody slips him some iasa and so he's already drunk he drinks this iasa he like starts hallucinating he goes out gets in the airplane flies off in the airplane in the middle of the night flies out to this spot in the jungle where they saw where they're supposed to bomb them that day instead he puts on a parachute ditches the plane jumps out oh my God lands in the jungle takes off all his clothes and his pistol buries it in the jungle and then walks naked into the village dude spoiler alert no no that's the beginning this the beginning the movie the beginning hold on a second I'm writing this down damn how young is he sexy look at him yeah what year was this the fil 91 91 wow back in the day son I was fresh out of high school John litha yeah yeah um anyway that's that's how it begins Peter mat's a great writer he uh he was a hard hardcore dude

17:12real badass guy but anyway um that's how it starts so so this guy literally goes back in time right because he's a Navajo and when he saw that guy shoot the arrow he sort of had this vision of how his people uh had lost their dignity and their cultured destroyed and If Only They had known what they were facing and these people in the jungle had no idea what's coming for them right and so his mission is I'm going to go back and save them because I can tell them what's coming I can you know move through worlds I can move back in time and it's wild what a great plot Jesus Christ I'm want get high right now scaring the out of me so la man I'm back in La yeah what happened I thought you were going to be an expat you're going to get out out of here before the big one landed yeah I'm still I'm watching I'm watching very closely before before they close the

18:05door I'm going to I got a way out what's it like coming back right at the time when Donald Trump becomes president it's an adventure huh it's strange I feel like I was saying this on my podcast the other day I feel like the like you know how the the solar system is moving you know the whole galaxy is moving so there all these zones I got to be careful man I'm going to start talking about don't be careful don't be careful there's no need to be careful think about Tom weights is it Tom weights is that the name of the actor no that's the singer Tom weights and toming he's an S same guy guy acted in that movie okay and then Tom Behringer who was in uh Saving Private Ryan right or platoon platoon he was the bad guy in platoon with a scar on his face yeah I think so right yeah it was a great movie speaking of meteors did you guys see this in Lake Michigan hit the other

18:56day yeah I did yeah a giant hunk of metal from the sky slammed into uh or something from the sky slammed into Lake Michigan look at that that might have actually burnt out before it hit the ground see you see it like kind of fizzling towards the end it's amazing what the atmosphere does just things coming through the atmosphere like you remember when uh the space shuttle lost some tiles and then burned out in the atmosphere I'm good I'm good Jimmy it's just amazing that our air just traveling through the air at a high rate of speed destroys things just rips them apart you know burns them up yeah yeah well the the threat of the impact of something that's in space is ever looming and always ignored I mean we rarely think about it until something like this happens and I think it's just so scary that there's a part of our brain that just puts it off we just go

19:50yeah and then move on to the next thing nothing you can do about it it's definitely gonna happen it's happened before you look up at the Moon there's an amazing video that Neil degros Tyson posted on his uh Instagram page the other day and it's a guy using a camera and he has some incredible lens on it in on it yeah I saw that it's amazing and you you I mean he's got a really good camera and you get really by the way that might not be Neil de degrass Tyson's actual page I think it might be like a fan page because it links up to Twitter and the Twitter is Neil degrass Tyson fan so it might not be his real Instagram page but whatever it's an awesome video and it gets to um really close up when it gets really close up the thing you see is just craters yeah everywhere yeah well there's no atmosphere to protect the moon exactly yeah but then you whoa just dropped chair just dropped

20:48and then you start thinking about how much is out there like that thing is just covered it's just covered with holes but time think about how long it's been out there too you know and the one I'm worried about is the solar flare oh yeah you know cuz that was it like 1880 or something there was a big one in North America and it melted out the transmission cables for the what's it called The Click Click Morse code guys the telegraph so when that hits like all our computers are gone computers are our grid yeah the Transformers are out so they they're saying if something like that does happen and you can never predict if or when it would take months to get power back up yeah and people who live in like Phoenix in August they're yeah I mean CU you live in a a cold place at least you could burn wood I mean people did that for a long time they figured out fire there was actually

21:43an article recently about neander TS and they're trying to figure out when there's like still a debate as to whether or not they actually knew how to make fire or whether they knew how to keep it lit once they found it right you know that they would find it and it would be like the sacred fire and they would keep it lit but they weren't quite smart enough to actually make it but now they're thinking that might not be the case they might have but a lot of debate on that yeah you you studied a lot of like ancient civilizations how much how much debate is there like whenever I hear someone say people definitely did this they definitely did that you know like when they're looking back at evidence like as to far as far as like who could handle fire like who who was the first people and when did they figure it out how do they put all that together well I mean it depends on the specific case

22:30right right with in the case of fire what they're looking at is that's and also because it's so there's such a scarcity of evidence things change really quickly right like for a long time they thought people crossed over the first North first Americans were about 10,000 years ago and now they're saying oh at least 14 and now they're finding places in Chile Where appear to be 40,000 and now they're thinking they came over in boats and there were several different you know groups that came in different ways so there's a a lot of change in that because there's so little evidence that when a new piece comes in it really radically transforms things but with fire what they're looking at is um evidence of fire concurrent with human habitation so with carbon dating you can figure out the age of the coals or the stuff that's that's left in the the ash um and then you'd

23:22look at pieces of bone or something that they were cooking and if you get the same uh air then you can figure okay they were this wasn't a fire 10,000 years after somebody ate a rat here or something right they were cooking it especially if the Bones Show charring as well then they're cooking the food but that's just in the last 15 or 20 years the estimate of human use of fire has gone from like 500,000 years to a million isn't that crazy they just keep backdating things yeahoo it's so fascinating do you see those Mounds they found in the Amazon really recently they used uh drones and they were getting these photograph drones are satellites they're getting these images from space from from above rather oh they show like grids and things yeah they show all these these uh structures that they previously never recognized didn't notice and some of them look like

24:14Stonehenge in the you know the same sort of shape apparently there's like irrigation canals and stuff yeah yeah they have no idea like who's the who uh what's this yeah I have this idea uh and I I have a lot of I need like a bunch of graduate students cuz I have ideas for books but I never get around to writing them that's the story of my life I need you should be like a I need a staff yeah you should be like a guy who tells like people we need to work on this because you're curious but you're not disciplined yeah yeah or you don't have the time I got ideas Joe I got a lot of ideas I mean between doing your podcast writing your book and living your life how much time do you have left yeah living my life takes up a lot of time I like that about you I appreciate that about you I really do I appreciate that you uh you have a very um very it's it's an intelligent

25:05but it's an honest way of looking at time you know you don't have like this overwhelming ambition and you don't have like this overwhelming desire to be recognized or anything like that but you do have an overwhelming desire to have fun and be comfortable and be curious so you're saying I'm a lazy hippie is what you're saying I'm saying you you're having a good time I think you might be doing it right at all the people that I know that are super smart you're like the least stressed super smart dude I know oh thank you I appreciate that for real can I quote you on that I'm going to put that on my next book you but you are man I mean considering you're always like moving around you're always enjoying different parts of the world you're always coming back with these crazy stories and interesting perspectives that you've gathered up but you you don't seem

25:50stressed and so many people that I know that are like in your intellectual realm are freaking out all the time yeah I know what you mean I mean if I'm stressed it's I get stressed by my lack of stress that's my biggest problem really dude you I think you're built for podcasts I really do I think your your mind and your curiosity it's like you're you're trapped in this medium I mean it's not that I don't think your book is great I I thought sex of Dawn was amazing why do I keep coughing is that the weed sex of Dawn was amazing but uh you you're really well suited for podcasts you're really well suited for free form conversations you could tell you enjoy it you know and again it's not very stressful no that's what I love about I I did one last night I I occasionally do a what I call Aroma ranting out my ass episode and it's where it's just me it's no guest right so last night I did one

26:48I'm drinking beer I'm like reading letters from people and yeah going off on whatever the I'm going off on and it occurred to me later like that you know I'm not dealing with the kind of numbers you're dealing with but you know I've got a stadium of people listening to me a Stadium right but I am more relaxed than if I were talking to a friend on the phone because I don't see anybody I'm just alone drinking a beer talking into this microphone and I don't feel the presence of anyone listening so I'm totally relaxed sometimes to my detriment I probably say things I shouldn't say and share that I meant to keep private or whatever but it's it is a weird thing I mean like I was Jamie and I were talking about this earlier like when you said hey Chris it's been a while come this it's like yeah I'm going to go hang out with my buddy Joe yeah but there are a million people hovering around

27:42here listening to us you know it's really weird like 90% of my friendship with you has taken place here I know right it's so and it's Duncan's the same you know AR's the same mhha Casher I've got all these friends who I only see when we're on a mic you know what's really interesting is Duncan and I we were having a really hard time spending time together yeah because he's always busy we'd have a really hard time with only a few times we got together and just hung out as friends over the last couple of years but we did so many podcasts together we would get together for that and we'd have these conversations like one one the thing that's unique about this form is that you have these conversations that are like so isolated from any distraction and I don't think that exists anywhere else anymore good point just two people looking at each that's why I don't like

28:29when people look at their phones I don't like when people like bring a laptop or something like that it's like man I try to close mine now I used to not I used to look at it it's not smart like the smart thing to do is just put it down and this form of conversation like the kind of like I would encourage people to have podcasts have their own podcast not even if they want to they don't don't even have to release it but by doing it by just the act of doing it you're you're having these conversations these extended convers ations with people and I think it it exercises your thought process in a way and the engagement process it focuses your mind people used to say some famous writer said I write to to see what I think you know yeah I think podcasting is sort of the same the way you're describing it it's true it's it's one place where we turn off all the

29:17distractions and just focus yeah yeah I my plan now is to get a van I want to get a sprinter van and like put a bed in it and you know a little kitchen travel the country the country doing podcasts ooh that's a great idea and I had this other idea cuz cuz I see you've got enough weight that people will come to you but I don't want to do on Skype and phone and I hate that I hate that yeah it feels weird right yeah there's delays and you're talking over each other and you can't see the body language you don't know if they're disengaging from what you're talking about or they're getting uncomfortable maybe you're getting too personal you know I really like being in a room with somebody yeah also the kind of people that I have on my podcast are like you they're people you want to know they're interesting people you know so I want to like hang out and meet their

30:03friends and meet the the husband or the wife and the kids and you know sit in the driveway in my van for a few days and get to know the crowd I me I was thinking I'd love to meet um what's his name d and Bisby your buddy uh the it up I'd love to beet Doug and bimbo not bimbo Bingo Bingo Bingo yeah you love them God damn my buddy uh Jake Johansson do you know him comedian sure love Jake Jake's great guy so I was at his house and he we were talking about how Comics think differently cuz I was like I love hanging with you guys because nobody gets offended about anything you can just say whatever the comes out of your head out of your mind and he was like we're talking about podcast and I said something about Stan hope and he's like dude you got to listen to the Cliffhanger episodes have you heard those no what are they what did he do oh my God no there

30:57it was like three years ago I went back into the Arches and archives and found them he had it was this thing where he has this couple living in the house in the backyard and like they'd met by chance and then it turned out that he had the woman 15 years earlier after a gig in Reno or something and so now she's with her boyfriend and they're living in the backyard and they're all buddies and the four of them are all the two couples I guess had a sexual thing and it was all cool and it it was just really beautiful and they're talking about how they met in the history of the relationship and all that the boyfriend's there the girlfriend's not there it turns out the girlfriend's in the hospital about to have open heart surgery that was the Cliffhanger holy so at the end of this like hour and a half two-hour conversation where they're talking about this you know this

31:47relationship it it turns out like she's going to have open heart surgery she might be dead folks tune in next week to find out if she's dead and they're laughing but They're laughing and this was Jake's point they're processing grief through laughter yeah and that there is nothing no and they're not denying how intense and sad and scared they are right but they're still laughing isn't it funny that grief over death is one of the few things where we demand you behave a certain way well they're Irish wakes right where everybody gets drunk and laughs yeah but and tells crazy body stories about the Dead Guy that's how you celebrate the life that's a good way yeah I think it's a very this this imposed sadness this sort of seriousness I think is very sort of protestant yeah there's there's a little bit of that but there's also I think we want to know who feels bad you

32:43know because if you don't feel bad like tribally I think that's a very dangerous person to have around like say if you die oh it's like a psychopath fil something yeah yeah I really think there might be something to that like we might enforce it and there might be like this uh urge and instinct to enforce extreme grief because we feel like people who who don't feel that or either not on my team really didn't care about the person that I cared about or might be a psycho right right interestingly some cultures have professional mourners like Greece they teach you how Japan you no you pay them to come to the funeral oh no and they'll whale and scream and cry and and they'll Express the emotion so the other people can just sort of chill and wow you know go to the buffet did you see after Kim Jong-un no ill Kim Jong Il died in North Korea that people were being punished because they

33:36didn't mourn hard enough they got six-month jail sentences oh man because they didn't mourn hard enough and they were just the worst fake acting like all throughout the streets and they're filming it for their propaganda films but it's like see if you can pull some of it up it's kind of hilarious it's it's hilarious and terrifying North Korea terrifies me and one of the things that terrifies me the most about it is that it is in our face every day direct evidence that things could go terribly wrong at any point in time with human beings and we got so lucky that we're born who wherever you are that you can listen to this and not have to worry about being locked up for possessing it whether it's in England or Norway or Canada where wherever you're listening to this we got so lucky you could have easily been born in North Korea any of us can been born in a prison in North

34:27Korea where you're born as a prisoner and you'll die as a prisoner and that's going on right now in 2017 there is a military dictatorship and they're killing people and imprisoning people and the lights are off at night when you fly over it they take satellite footage of it you see the lights are all off like look at these people wailing on the street I mean it is Uber bizarre they're they're all on their knees wailing but not a goddamn tear to be seen they're just they just throwing their I mean they're probably scared to that they're going to be beaten if they don't whale hard enough so they're scared of that well that make you forces the emotion but this is this it is unbelievable that human beings no different than us there's no difference between them and us they're just there yeah that guy could be your neighbor like one of those people wailing could

35:19be you know Francis your neighbor and he could be this awesome guy like dude what's up man how are you oh everything's good you know blah blah blah same guy could be the same guy just got born in a better better spot these are all women oddly enough this is all women wailing oh there's some men they have to separate so they don't while they're crying they don't want any f monkey business while you're screaming look at these guys crying look at them it's so strange it's so strange but this is happening today so I understand this is a different part of the world but you got to we have have to all recognize that it's just dumb luck that we were born here cuz there's these systems that that exist whenever you have gigantic groups of people that are at least fairly isolated and these systems these operating systems they they they get inforced and it doesn't matter where they are once they get

36:16enforced they're super difficult to break like those Su women who cut their lip and stick those plates in them and stretch their lips out and do like that's that's part of a system that that exists in that area and that system is like it's there the women are trying to get away from it now and a lot of women are like I don't want to slobber all the time I don't want to knock my teeth out to put some stupid plate in I heard of a tribe where women um laser the hair off their oh I heard about that one sometimes they wax it right and they used to just shave it exactly they used to just shave and they wear these shoes with like a big spike on the back so they they can't walk it's incred people will do and the women wear these like really short skirts I describe like Megan Kelly's outfit in my bit there's a bit I'm working on right now that I talk about what she's wearing is basically a

37:08vagina curtain yeah I saw your bit the other night that thing literally is what it is I mean it's just these beautiful women on TV on the news and they're wearing something that just there's you know you could lift that up and her with it that's part of the that's part of the game that's what a skirt is that's the whole point of ITT it up that's why Fatal Attraction scene was Susan what was her name not Susan Sharon Stone that's why it was so impactful cuz we've all imagined that a million times you know yeah yeah amazing you know she did look at that get the out of Dodge it's just a shadow if she didn't have that clipboard there blocking the light the Glorious light look at this is crazy man that's that's a crazy outfit that is a sex outfit and I like her I think she's very smart very interesting woman and I'm I'm curious to see what happens to her now

38:00that she's at NBC maybe she'll come on The Joe Rogan Experience I don't want it but be cross from stammer stammer I panic you can do it from a remote location yeah we have to do that one by Skype I don't be n call me in I'll guess to I can handle it I can do it I have a thing for Ice princesses as long as I don't get high do you like the ice princess I there something about me that uh I think that like a very powerful articulate woman like that is very very exciting well see cuz that's it you're the opposite of me you were saying I'm like a the stressfree kind of guy you're all about the challenge only some I'm not like I'm not trying to or anything like that like not that that kind of challenge but I am fascinated like you came here from working out yeah right you know and then you like you because it's funny you talked about my life being like this sort of Carefree

38:46easygoing thing I think of you you're like you're like the Martha stward of men or something like you do everything how do you do you're living like I I dropped your name occasionally and someone would be like oh the the podcast guy yeah yeah and like his friend will go wait I thought he was the UFC guy yeah yeah that too like but wait isn't he the like you have nine lives and you're living them all how the do you do that I don't know you're like Mr efficiency you never sleep plus you're a father your husband I do all that stuff I I think it's it's an illusion that it takes more time than it does with all the stuff that I do I don't have a job job chill yeah chill when I watch Like documentaries and but see that's not chill that's chill I can't chill chill chill chill you don't just like get in your hammock and put your hands behind your head and go you never

39:34do that my brain doesn't work like that my brain's like day we got to do something come on your shower I love showers you take long ones yeah like a nice 10-minute hot shower so much pleasure in showers dude you have like a good in a shower and that's your chill time I went to Alaska uh to uh Prince of Wales no yeah yeah Prince to Wales Island and uh it is this unbelievably wet spot and they it rains there more than I think anywhere else in North America it's incredible I mean it's just constantly drenched with rain Southeast I don't know I don't know where it is uh geographically I flew in for this TV show meat eater with my friend Sten Rella and my friend Brian Kalen and Giannis pellis and we went to this island it was amazing it was amazing experience so beautiful and so remote and so crazy it wasn't even a successful hunting trip but it was amazing the experience was amazing but

40:30one of the most amazing things about it was that I was wet and uncomfortable in this weird sort of environment where you never really get dry cuz it's constantly raining yeah for five or six days and then when I got home I was so happy I was so happy I was happy in a way that i' had never been before in a way during a regular day just driving down the street to the studio and coming in and hanging out with Jamie and doing podcast and I just felt so good I felt so good you felt good to be back or just that like see it wasn't I feel good to be back it was I feel good I feel really good and I think that especially for California the weather here is so goddamn good that we have a few days where it rains and people literally start to complain and I'm like do you know how crazy it is that you're complaining that it rains maybe 10 days a year out of 300 65 and the light is so beautiful

41:29after the rain so clear it's amazing the there's no bugs okay I mean this place is so easy to get by with there's very little Wildlife that we're ever concerned with we just live this idilic idolic what's the word idilic idilic it sounds wrong though doesn't it it's an idol it's not an idol it's an idil we live a fairy tale life yeah you know for anywhere anyone else anywhere in the world and I think just coming here from the rain soaked Island like as I was driving around I was I would realize like oh at least for me I have to go through some intense struggle to appreciate normal existence there is no Yang without Yin for me for sure and there's no Comfort without discomfort so for me like for me to be happy and calm and like sit here and talk to you I I got to beat the out of a heavy bag for an hour I wish whale on that thing I wish I had that hunger I

42:28that need I've got friends like I can't I can't relax if I don't run three miles a day like I wish I had that I can re I can get out of bed and go right to the hammock I'm fine I don't need to do anything it's good it's good that you can do that and well but it is and it isn't see that's I don't get done I need more of that because uh I'd get more done but then it's like why get done you know like what am I trying to get to if I'm already there it's that's why I think podcasts your yeah because podcast effortless just turn it on and do it and maybe like the way you're doing it with that ranting the the Roma one yeah that's a great idea Bill Burr does that and it's incredibly entertaining yeah Bill Burr's podcast one of the best podcasts you'll ever listen to and it's always just him I always watch when he's on your show you guys have a good thing great I love

43:15him he's amazing and his new comedy uh Netflix special rather is out now it's called Uh walk your way out it's out right now I haven't seen it yet but I saw him do all that material so I'm sure it's going to be amazing yeah he's great yeah he's you know he's a hard worker too you know that guy um he works on F for family he's got his own uh animated show he works on that works on a standup does his podcast twice a week by himself he just had a kid recently just had a kid very very intense family thing going on lot going on great guy just a great guy it is funny I mean Jamie and I were talking about this earlier how like La I've been here a couple months now right so I'm sort of getting my head back into it every everything's the opposite here like even to the point where people think like oh you're living in La they're picturing Hollywood where you live and where I live it's owls

44:04and coyotes and it's like it doesn't look like especially where you live where you live is like one of the most awesome spots around love it ridiculous ridiculous it's like Montana or something it's crazy it's beautiful so a lot of hippies though a lot of hippies but you don't see them they smell dude I was sit I was walking but there's a lot of fresh air so you know it's they're Outdoors it's like a dirty dog it doesn't offend you you don't get that close to it exactly I was uh I was hiking up in the hills in Tanga a couple weeks ago and I'm sitting there on this Trail taking a you know taking in the view and I hear these two guys coming up the trail and they can't see me cuz there's you know it's a curve and they're talking and the one guy says uh so are you feeling anything yet so and the other guy's like well my legs feel a little funny but you know so

44:54either he took Viagra and they're going to go go to the woods to see that didn't even occur to me Joe I don't know I don't know why it occurred to you you ready to do this or what bro feel anything yet you loosening up yeah it was a bit that I used to do about Edibles whereas like the worst thing you could ever hear someone say after they take an edible is I don't feel I'm going to take another one yeah no don't do that it's always the case right when people just you feel it ah not really you want to go one more yeah it and then an hour and a half later you're in Terror just a deep deep state of teror yeah yeah I was called in to consult on a case in Spain with a guy that was in a mental hospital and um the psychiatrist who was treating him was a friend of mine and knew that I took a lot of drugs and this guy didn't hadn't taken any drugs so he's like could you just come

45:45in and like talk to this guy and see what you think you know so I meet with the guy and I'm like so what's your story man he's like well look I was in Amsterdam and I ate a brownie and I wasn't feeling anything and so then I took these mushrooms and you know and next thing I know I woke up I was uh in the a jail Cale naked and I had I started walking down this apparently they tell me I was screaming and singing and I was like so but are you all right man he's like yeah I'm fine but everyone thinks I'm crazy because of this thing and it's just like I you know I keep telling them it's no big deal I like all right it's like the guy from the Tom barer movie yeah exactly he's just like so I talked to my friend I'm like the guy's fine the guy's not crazy he just like ate too many brownies in Amsterdam it happens to everybody yeah if you eat brownies like too many

46:35brownies and mushrooms together yeah not good but they work together though that's one of the interesting things about marijuana and psilocybin they're very complimentary like that was what McKenna used to do when he would take a mushroom trip he would eat the mushroom and then he would wait um for it to kick in and while he was waiting for it to kick in he would roll joints and so he would just roll a shitload of joints and then just start smashing the joints and then the marijuana would sort of like reach out and grab the siloc iban and embrace it and just create this tornado of Awesomeness yeah and that's how he used to trip and he used to do it by himself McKenna's thing was about silent Darkness he was really concerned with experiencing the Psychedelic state in a very undisturbed manner like to him the idea of taking mushrooms and going to amusement park was insane like that's he

47:30had no desire to do anything like that he just wanted to figure out and I think what is the the quote each time he would try to see how much more he could stand you know and he would do that for a while maybe he was describing another guy when he was talking about that now that I think about it but he was uh like a proponent of five dried grams he what he called it heroic dose yeah that heroic dose got me in trouble I was I was reading McKenna uh and I got this acid from a friend of mine I can't talk about where it came from but it was like one of these sources where it's like holy like really from that Source okay right from Albert Hoffman's lab pretty much that kind of thing yeah so uh cuz like I used to be very embedded in that world of like scientists who were doing huc enic research and stuff anyway so I I can't tell the whole story but I I decided to

48:31take a heroic dose cuz it was like I'm not going to do a lot more acid in my life might as well like go out with a bang and I took the stuff and how much did you take well it was liquid uh funnily enough what happened was I this psychiatrist who was a friend of mine he hadn't done any drugs since the 60s back in the days when you could order acid from Sandos and they'd send it to you Jesus Christ right how long did that last that lasted till it was made illegal in' 64 or something like that I thought it was all what didn't um LSD go down with that sweeping psychedelics sax of 1970 or could have been later was that maybe LSD went down before that and sbin went on afterwards I don't know there was a a bunch of them that were made illegal in 70 right even ones that aren't even psycho under Nixon yeah yeah yeah yeah well in any case they you know it was marketed LSD was marketed to um

49:29doctors and to psychiatrists and psychologists who would take it in order to experience psychosis so they could better treat their patients wow it was called a psycho mimetic so you could just order it and take it and like oh this is what it's like to be psychotic and now I understand better but you think think about I mean from a medical perspective think about the nobility of that like what a cool doctor and what an interesting time where it was like hey we all need to experience 9 hours of insanity so that we'll be better psychiatrists that's a pretty cool thing that is very cool it's a very cool way of looking at it right yeah it's a lifeguard who jumps into the water not a lifeguard who stands on the beach and throws you a pill you know yeah if you talk to a psychiatrist and the psychiatrist doesn't have any psychedelic experiences you you you can understand it cuz you

50:24know especially if you're an academic you want to be respected psychedelic experiences for the most part are illegal and you know people get weird about it and I could understand want to keep it under wraps but if you're not really interested in it at all how much are you studying the Mind exactly and you're not experiential uh evidence is invalid I mean come on it's very valid we know that there's some extreme effects that happen with some very potent psychedelics like um uh what is it uh Sage what is what is it called um what do they call it Salvia Salvia Salvia dorum which is essentially Sage right yeah that's that stuff will blow your mind and that was available in head shops just a few years ago it is one of the most potent psychedelics known to man I think it was Ari who had he did it and he he had a life he lived a whole life like three years he felt like he lived a life he

51:27had friends he had girlfriends he broke up with them he had jobs like the whole deal The Matrix and then he came back and he was only gone for like 10 minutes on this couch on a Salvia trip did we isolate that on a clip is that what you're looking for yeah there's a clip of him doing it and then he talked about what happened later I think it was with you maybe on a dunk one of Duncan podcast but here's the clip of him doing it yeah I'm like one O'Brien's old podcast I naughty show Sam triple's podcast on Brian's death squad Network and so he uh AR's he's gone right there so he's gone there and they're all laughing and talking he haa well this guy's tripping his balls off like he's in another dimension tell take my now please don't take them off to Polie do it please I'm not joking I'm not serious actually who all right you're fine you're fine all right you're fine

52:39all you're fine buddy fine you're fine you're fine you're okay need to just get away from him leave him alone oh my God he was tripping so hard all right you're all right didn't he think he was like suffocating right that he explains it during that podcast yeah yeah during the podcast he explained it he suffering there but what happened ENT I think is they just probably talking too much and he probably snapped out of it and he was in the middle of this Haze of reality and illusion I think doing something like that like you got to be around people are going to be quiet you know when you do it you know they're quiet when they do it you're quiet and you'll just sit there yeah I did uh after I saw you saw you about a year ago I think I went from here to Mexico I went to that IBO gain clinic in Tijuana oh you did huh that I didn't do the experience I was just there just want to

53:31see what it was like yeah I was doing a podcast with uh the doctor who works there and I met some people down there who had um 5 Meo DMT the can to or the toad thing and I did that that was a that was really intense I'd never done DMT before I done iasa but never smoked EMT 5 Meo is the really weird stuff cuz it's very empty you uh you go away like you go you go to the center of the universe you become everything I guess yeah how strong I mean how much of a a dose did you get did you blast off I I blasted off yeah yeah did you feel like that like you were gone uh the first few minutes or or you know who knows how many minutes or time whatever but the the first period um yeah there was that sort of ego dissolution where it's not me having this experience it's just experience it's itors andap and holy but then in my case and this just reminded me of it watching Ari there in

54:34my case what happened was I got uh overwhelmed by sadness like I cuz people some people I'm close to are going through really heavy in the last couple of years and you know you sort of you feel compassion and you you check in with them and you you compassion literally means to feel together right and so you feel it with him but on another level it's like I'm not the one who's got Ms you know I'm not the one who's you know got chronic pain and you know suffering all this um so there's a separation but what I experienced with that was the absence of separation and I I was just immersed in the sadness of people I love and you know seeing them suffering and not being able to help them and it was overwhelming man I mean I cried like a baby literally wow and uh and then I started coming out of it and the room was quiet and it was candl light and all this and the person who was sort of

55:29overseeing it was really nice and you know sort of okay you're starting to feel better now and here's a tissue and whatever and then this music came on and my first thought my my first conscious thought was remember when I write the Yelp review of this experience to mention that the music should be different what wow the music sucked it was this New Age music and I was like if you're going to play music play some boach or something don't play some Yanni or whatever the this is yeah and but my cuz you know I not that I use Yelp a lot but it was just sort of like you know remember to mention this this could improve the experience for other people you know what the what a weird way of thinking that's a very weird way of thinking so I had like this super profound experience encased in the most trivial imaginable I guess Stan hope did that 5 Meo DMT back when you could buy it

56:31online yeah and he did it at my place we did it together but he had never done it before I had done it a few times when uh he and I did it and he did it and I've never seen anybody get a hit by it harder like he literally he was like slumped on my couch and he was making he was groaning like it was it was disturbing it was it was so it was so extreme that I was wondering like I knew that this is like something that the human body makes I knew that it's one of the most transient drugs ever observed in the body your body brings it back to Baseline really quickly but not at that dosage but I don't know how much he what he didn't take that much he didn't take any more than I took but it hit him like a goddamn Mac Truck and uh he came out of it and he just kept saying life life just becomes life and then eats life and becomes life and just life just becomes life it just

57:30goes on it just goes on just goes on there's no denying that he's just looking at me like wow I go you tripped your balls off son yeah like but I was worried I was like I can't kill my friend I was literally worried for a few minutes I was like what if his body just can't handle it like cuz Doug is world famous for abusing himself cigarettes and booze and it's just he's got hernas he can stick out he could like Flex his stomach and things would pop out of his gut I'm not bullshitting he's hilarious but you know he's a maniac just there's that's not a game man he's not he's not playing an act that's Doug he is who he is and I was thinking maybe this is like slapping a Corvette engine into a 1969 Dodge Dart that's got 289,000 miles and Sh bad brakes and it just seemed like wa what have I done I shot him through cuz that the when when I did it it felt like

58:28I got shot through a cannon it was like like the the experience of the launch like it came on slow like it came on like it took like a few seconds and then once it hit it just it's almost like you're pulling back against a catapult band or rubber band or slingshot just and then it was just flying to no me yeah to like where I flew to there was no me there was no difference between me and the air that's in front of me and the the wood that makes this table and the floor beneath and all the different molecules and atoms like it broke down the existence of everything to some strange geometric level and it was really intense and totally colorless it's like a big white thing like it would bring you to this weird geometric white thing whereas DMT is like NN dimethyl tryptamine is five methoxy dimethyl tript toine is 5 Meo and it's just a different visual experience than

59:32NN dimethy triamine which is the one that brings you these intense visions of geometric patterns and dancing like the last time I did it they were dancing Jokers that were giving me the finger they just kept giving me the finger and I was like oh yeah I deserve that I felt it like as they were doing it they're like you you and I was realizing like oh someone needs to say that to me like U I'm being a silly person like by even trying to control this trip like by even like thinking that like I'm just going to go into this I've been do I've been a good boy been doing my yoga and eating healthy and this should be a good good trip you it was like you you got no control out of this you better relax that's what makes it a heroic dose you got to let go well all DMT is a heroic dose once you pass that thre hit threshold goodbye see you you're gone there's no microing no you're gone

60:23you're gone or you're gone you're just gone yeah that heroic dose I took I ended up I mean the story was a lot of weird happened so you never got done explaining how much did you actually take four hits oh Jesus yeah cuz I gave this old psychiatrist three hits and I saw him a couple weeks later and he was like oh that was good clean stuff you know no problem and I thought well that guy's in his 60s could take three I'll take four I met this dude in Montana recently very nice guy named Jeff and he was working with us on this meater show and he's told us that he took 25 hits of acid one night see I I went back in the day I did five or six or whatever but I felt like there's a plateau like I couldn't trip any harder than I tripped so I I don't know that 20 would be yeah he just went with it he said forget how he described it we just went with it I just last

61:14night I watched this um documentary called the Sunshine makers about the guys owley and and the two guys who were making orange Sunshine together the famous AET of the s oh yeah and one of the guys was like that's all Sandos right that's all Sandos Labs no that was the legal in Switzerland this is the guys in California and Colorado briefly who were making the illegal stuff oh um orange sunshine I forget the there's two guys the one guy was um here goes Jam's got it a documentary Nicholas and Tim Scully the unlikely Duo at the heart of the 1960s American Drug counterculture wow yeah it's quite good it's so weird that that was so incredibly recent but within like a few decades they had basically erased all evidence of it from culture except for a few Fringe people you know yeah I mean talking about old research there were thousands tens of thousands of scientific papers published on how

62:12hallucinogens affect the brain in fact the serotonergic system the the whole understanding of neurotransmitters really was fueled by trying to understand how so little LSD could make you so high that's what that's what got people into looking at neurotransmitters and the effects on Consciousness in the late 50s anyway I mean we could talk for ever about how hallucinogens have changed culture but uh what the hell was I saying oh so you took four hits in the movie this guy says yeah but the movie this guy says um you know he's talking about how they're like doing the the Vats and he's a chemist and he's like every once in a while you know you like touch something and it's hot and you go oh and put your thumb in your mouth and like oh I just took 200 micrograms of LSD like oh well they were high all the time while they were working yeah and that's actually 20 hits roughly 2,000

63:04mic my God now isn't there like a number like someone told me this this is maybe one of those Urban myths like you have to register your hands as lethal weapons once you get your black belt that was an urban myth too but isn't there an Urban myth that like if you do a certain amount of acid you're considered legally insane I heard that I don't know I don't know if that's true I hope it is cuz then I'm like free and clear let me see Jamie is it real that's F I've heard that my whole life a kid too yeah do you remember hearing that it's yeah it was like seven hits will make you insane but I don't know if that's you're gone bro legally so anything you do afterwards if you can prove you tripped at least whatever seven times I've met people that have done big doses of acid and some of them have had a really hard time grasping regular reality and I wonder if there's a correlation I wonder if

63:48there's a connection between like some of them have like really distorted perceptions of what's going on right now in terms of like like like an experience will happen and they'll have a version of the experience and you'll relay your version of that experience and they they didn't remember that at all and you're like man I don't know who's got this right because memory is kind of a slippery thing but I don't remember him saying that to you man I don't remember someone doing that to you I don't remember that going down like people have these weird perceived interactions that maybe like are a little skewed and you I always wonder like is it the 39 hits of acid you took one night is it I mean did you blow a fuse can you blow a fuse but isn't it like you know somebody who works out and and they mess up their back and you say well you could blame it on working out or you could blame it on

64:30working out wrong or you could blame it on the fact that you probably already had a structural issue in your back that this just uncovered so I think a lot of people who have bad experiences or end up up from hallucinogens they're they were going to be up anyway and there are psychotic breaks you know like this kid that I talked about earlier in am Amsterdam he had a psychotic break but generally you can recover from that and you'll be fine unless there's some underlying structural issue in your personality you know so I don't know I think it's it's multifactorial like everything is ultimately you I think you're totally right that tot it completely makes sense and it's one of the things that you've got to think about when you talk about food or alcohol or anything that people wind up getting addicted to right I mean people can blow their brains out on a variety

65:20of different substances that are readily available right they don't for the reason for the effect but normally it's a million reasons for an effect but it's no consolation if your son goes crazy from taking acid you know it's one of those things if acid became legal yeah and your son walked into a CVS and and bought acid and did too much of it with his friends and never came back and you had to take care of him when he's 50 no it's no consolation but you know a lot of people have psychotic breaks when their girlfriend breaks up with them the first time true true so are we going to blame women for psychosis you I know it's it's hard to describe or to really recognize like what is a psychotic break what is like real mental illness and when are you just being a well a professional should be able to recognize I would hope so at least when you're just being a is there an

66:07edge is there an edge to like mental illness and just being a like a we're talking about psychosis right so Neurosis I'm just going call her one more time dude don't call her I've got to call her no you don't you don't have to call her the universe is telling me to call her talk to her I have to talk to her right now she'll understand what's talk to her dude there is a restraining order stop do you want to go to jail I'm just going to knock on her window don't KN window do it there's people that get obsessed with people when it comes to relationships and you just go what people get addicted to each other they get as addicted to each other as they get addicted to Sugar easily it's harder for people to break up with people than it is from the kick sugar people can kick sugar they decide they want to lose weight a lot of people do it but when people break up like the emotion

66:54toll that you take it's so devastating and I think part of the reason why the emotional toll is so devastating unless being with the person was completely negative if it was completely negative then you're like finally I'm free I've had a few of those in my life and I'm sure you have too but there's other ones where you're like God this feels terrible you know it's like it's like a emotional flu yeah that doesn't want to go away and I think it's because we get addicted to each other in the same way that we bonded to create these communal tribes of 50 people back in the day those instincts still remain and I think one of the reward systems and you would know better than I of connecting everybody together with this is got to be this deep affection and this addiction that we develop towards each other yeah well we need to be loved we need to be touched and a lot of times if

67:45you don't have a partner nobody's touching you yeah you know uh as an adult and uh yeah I mean love is a funny thing I I talk about this a lot on the podcast you know I guess I'm people think I'm some sort of relationship expert which is hilarious um but uh I I told this I don't know if I've told this story in your podcast but my dad has this Golden Retriever and he's had like five of them they all look the same I don't know this one the last one's named Brandy okay so the Fourth of July they had the dog out in the backyard and they went to watch some Fourth of July thing some party somewhere and apparently the fireworks scared the dog and the jumped the fence and took off oh no and so that my dad and my sister were all freaked out and they're putting up sto um signs all over the neighborhood and call in into the shelters and all that day or two later they get a call from a shelter

68:35hey we've got your dog come down like oh there she is so take the dog home they're in the backyard throwing the ball with the dog and my sister's boyfriend comes home and he looks out the window and he says to my mom whose dog are they playing with and she said well that's Brandy and he said that's not Brandy and then a few minutes later the phone rings it's a neighbor hey we've got Brandy oh Jesus it's a wrong dog right so what do they do they took it back to the pound they should have killed it just kidding you impostor I'm kidding and eating it you trying to pretend you're Brandy you're not Brandy you even respond to Brandy fraud but my point yeah no the dog was like you know what did I do wrong I chased your ball you know I mean they they were they sound like a great dog owner they should have just kept it should have exactly that PO dog it's like you adopt a kid and like think

69:28you're going to send you back yeah if somebody comes looking for that dog then call me until then that dog lives here should have been should have been yeah you can't bring it back to the pound what a drag for the dog I know but my point is they're in the backyard with the dog what are they feeling my dad's feeling incredible relief right bry's back love he loves Brandy wow that ain't Brandy but it doesn't matter because he's still feeling love and I think we do that in our relationships we project our need to love on whoever the will take it I mean what's that Beetle song I need somebody to love and then in the back you ever listen in the back they say can it be anybody and then he says I just want someone to love I don't give a who it is I I just want a dog I don't care I want a girl friend I'll take whatever what do you got well that's a thing with a lot of people that

70:21don't have relationships they have a bunch of pets yeah cuz they need someone or something to love that love you come home if you're a single person you come home your dogs are so happy to see you you're like hello hello you get your kisses in get your pets in yeah I mean dogs are like emotional Band-Aids for a lot of people yeah even cats I you have cats right I I love cats and they don't give a they don't give a if you're there or not but they'll sit on your lap and purr when you pet them yeah they'll accept your love yeah which is nice sometimes that's enough dogs are better obviously no I can't believe you're going to get into dogs versus cats debate man this show sucks now that's right I forget there they are the millions listening in it's just such a hack KN debate dogs versus cats I'm really into arvar bro I'm on a pet arvar yeah I watched a video online

71:14of a wild pig that had eaten through a cow's body and got stuck and the farmer found the cow and this wild pig is like coming out through a hole in its stomach like it eaten through the cow and got stuck J it's like Jim Cary and Pet Detective when he comes out of that zebra's ass check this out is this it yeah there it is you watch a lot of gross man this is not that gross see look at it it's stuck it can't get out of the body that's the skin yep the skin of the cow it ate through it but then it can't get its fat body through it got its head through but it can't fit the rest of it through how can it not back out doesn't know what to do it's stupid dumb Wild wild pig I have a friend who has a pig a pet pig a pop pelly pig one those yeah exactly apparently it's like really smart and affectionate yeah yeah it's a bummer there's eating Bacon's a bummer if you think about what

72:08pig is it is I keep trying to find crueltyfree bacon and it's just not there it's not real I can't find it you got to shoot a pig to get bacon there's a certain amount of Cruelty involved in that delicious taste you ever hear a pig or see a pig die I've killed pigs you've killed yeah they don't die well I the one I killed died real quick I shot it with a 300 wind mag and it died instantly boom no in the body body cavity like blew its heart out but it died instantaneously just over round I drove a 300 the scope into my forehead on a 300 wi mag that was nice it's got a lot of kick but it's a good round because anything it hits dies very humanely very quickly right if you hit it right obviously yeah but um wild pigs are a huge huge problem and I know that pig people have a a problem with people eating animals and I get that but there's always going to be an issue even

73:02if we didn't eat any animals if you don't want all of your vegetables eaten up by wild pigs somebody has to control the population cuz there's no way to control them they they breed at a staggering rate yeah they breed three or four I mean they'll have these litters they can have litters two three times a year they start having litters when they're 6 months old when they're 6 months old they start out pigs and there's a ton of them I mean there's like up around Sona County yeah up in in San Jose they're eating people's lawns in residential neighborhoods and they're not to be with either you don't go hey get out of here Pig they'll they'll kill your dog too they'll your dog up and slice him up and they'll eat them too once he's dead their tusks like especially the big bores they're enormous animals too you're talking about like some of them are they they

73:45shot one at the tone Ranch they think it was about 350 lbs last week 350 lb yeah for and this is a wild SN ning horrific Beast yeah it's not it's not a fat pig wallowing around they're fast and aggressive they're fast aggressive and ferocious they have a a what's called a um a Shield Plate all around their front body like where their face is like from their jawline back they have this incredibly thick like leather and it's to protect them from going to war with other male bores and those giant tusks so they slice each other up and so these things are just they're tanks yeah they're super durable tanks who are born at a ridiculous rate like there's millions of them roaming through the country there was an article that I posted um on Twitter just a few days ago where uh the scientists were saying it's just a matter of time before every County in every state has a wild pig

74:44problem it's just they're they're not stopping the the breeding they're not stopping the growth and they're just going to slowly spread out like coyotes and the meat's good right oh it's really good I mean it's the perfect situation because you're you're killing something that needs to be killed you know it used to be cougars were killing them and you know whatever other Predators were keeping them in check there well it's not they're an invasive species they weren't native to North America no they're brought over here from Russia they're brought over here from Asia they're brought over here from different parts of the world there's some ferocious Russian ones that are in the northern California coast that are connected to I think it was William Randolph Hurst I think the Hurst Castle up there I think William Rand Hurst had uh bores up there it's one more thing

75:28they came from they were predators you know Siberian they you know they probably lived in incredibly harsh environments and it's one of the reasons why they Thrive here yeah and my point is there's no Predator now they're living free they're not they're not like pigs that are turned into bacon or in these cages where they can't turn around and all that see that's the thing that gets me I eat meat and I have no problem eating meat because as Doug Stan hope said life becomes life you know life eats life that's what it does there's no getting around that there's a book called The vegetarian myth you ever read that um yes there's a woman who was a vegan for 20 years and then she's like I'm going to grow my own food and as soon as she started growing her own food she realized there's no way to even grow food without killing stuff you got to put like the stuff down to

76:13protect the garden from the Slugs that kills the Slugs the fertilizers made out of bone and blood meal where's that come from right it's like there's no way to not kill things in order to eat even if you're eating vegetables you're still killing things to eat them well that's the connection to the actual food itself right right from the source it gives you this understanding of it but still you can you can mitigate the amount of suffering that you put that's what I was going to say yeah I've got no problem eating something that lived a life right a free life like these wild bores what I have a problem with is the industrial process you know wild BS might be one of the few things that we um we almost have enough where everybody can hunt them because I mean there's not enough deer there's not enough elk for people to to hunt in this country like if everybody wanted to do what some people

77:03are trying to do where they're just trying to get all the meat from the wild there just not enough wild but there's enough for the amount of people that are doing it for sure definitely it's very sustainable but that's also why it's like really difficult to get certain tags for certain animals in certain areas where they do monitor the population and they say well we have like a certain amount here this is a this is the amount that we have and this is the amount that we think would be healthy to remove from the population because of the competition for food and this and that and and you know so these people compete for not compete but they put in their uh for like they apply for a tag it's like a lottery system yeah there might be a thousand people apply but only a 100 get tags and now of those 100 most of the time it's there it's not even 50% success rate so the the

77:49proposition of going out and just trying to get your own meat it's very catchy it's very hard to do not everybody could do it so it's not it's not really a viable alternative to feeding 350 million people but it could be viable for you and I feel like that's the thing about people when it comes to you know impact we always we have this weird thing where we go well everybody can't do that you're right everybody can't do that everybody can't live in your house either right everybody doesn't want to do that everybody can't sleep in your bed every everybody can't your wife unless you guys are like that unless you're freaks you know it's like there's a certain amount of you can think of for your own life like for your own life you want to feel better go shoot a wild pig that's where you get your food you'll feel better you'll feel weird you Michael pollen wrote a very interesting

78:34essay about him shooting a wild pig up in somoma it's it's I think it's included in the omnivores dilemma his big bestseller where he wanted to trace the origins of everything every element of a meal and so he built the book around that but he I remember reading that uh essay in the New Yorker I think and um I was struck by how he he conveys really powerfully the feeling of having killed something where there was this sort of Jubilation followed by shame followed by like confusion and disgust and like all these things were like sort of waves passing through him you know he wasn't a big hunter he just wanted to have this one experience right and uh yeah it's I my buddy Justin's going to take me hun uh he's been offering for a couple years now and I want to do it I'm not a big killer but I know how to shoot guns and I feel some responsibility to face the

79:32reality of meat you know I mean just face it you're killing you know just cuz someone's doing it for you in a factory and cutting it up and putting in plastic that doesn't mean you're not involved in that process would you be one of the people that would adopt lab created meat would you put that in your diet once that that actually happens cuz they're pretty sure that they're going to be able to make that happen soon or would you look at it and say well I mean how would you look at it I'd want to look at it scientifically and know you know what's the nutritional content cuz right I'm very suspicious of you know these things that come out of Laboratories yeah but if it turned out that it was it tasted the same the nutritional content was as good as wild you know meat with grass-fed omega-3 and all that kind of stuff the omega-3 omega-6 ratios were right yeah I'd eat

80:23it why not I eat a lot of weird and we all do or most of us you know I would definitely try it my mother had a bowl of cheese puffs the other day at the Super Bowl what the is a cheese puff fire talk about something that comes out of a lab or marshmallows what are Mar you know that they have banned trans fats in the United States but they allow people to put them in for the next couple years in 2018 it runs out so until then then you could poison people yeah until then you could keep throwing that stuff in whatever the baked goods and potato Creations what did we find out that trans fats are in it was in like microwave popcorn I think was one that's crazy that stuff's goddamn delicious yeah I love microwave popcorn and what do you need to make popcorn it's not I mean just make it normally a little oil I know but it's so convenient if you're a lazy it's

81:17the stockpiles you can't you got to roll do you know the whole like sort of fertilizer and um uh not fertilizer pesticide and insecticide you know Farm spraying crops and all that that all started because at the end of World War II there were huge stockpiles of chemical weapons that weren't used and so they're like what are we going to do with this we got to sell this and they were like well we can dilute it and spray it and it'll kill aphids or whatever the and there really wasn't a big problem with pests in the American farming industry but they had all the pile of stuff and Rachel Carson writes about this in Silent Spring wow classic book yeah crazy so it's like there's bacon and eggs we think that's like a natural breakfast thing that was invented by an advertising agency yeah we talked about this before we yeah we talked about this and we talked about

82:10how Kelloggs created really Bland cereal to keep people from beating off see that's my stick right there that's a beautiful stick though once people find out that's true you're like what just think of how bizarre graham crackers what yeah what was graham crackers again again it was C Graham and Kellogg were the two sort of anti-masturbation guys and he thought graham crackers keep you from beating off because they're so Bland that's hilarious yeah isn't it hilarious that they they Associated spicy food like Latinos dancing oh they hot pepper tacos it's all about the tacos yeah some hot salsa salsa music W they're getting crazy you always associate salsa music with a woman with like a dress that's like slid up the side man all the way up to her hip see I wish if I were efficient like you I would have learned to salsa dance years ago I'm not that efficient I don't salsa I can't even ice

83:00skate yeah I like the connection somehow in your head there's salsa dancing and then right next to that on the Shelf is ice skating well ice skating seems to be something that a lot of people know how to do not a lot of Mexicans that's true not a lot of African ice skaters right that's why black people haven't dominated hockey otherwise they would have taken over that too it's coming it's coming because ice skating like I never learned yeah I can't ice skate either really I feel good now my kids can my wife can but like to me the sexiest women are the women who are salsa dancing oh you know like dirty sweaty Latin you know move the way they move and it's all like well it's a party and I just love to be out there on the floor Mr cool guy in a light colored suit you know yeah like Miami Vice yeah exactly that's what I'm picturing but uh loers no socks that's me man like you're doing

83:51in my dream that's me problem with loafers no socks is they could really stink after a while right you can get your feetal sweat in there it's disgusting and there's not a much yeah it's gross yeah I don't know I'm lucky in that respect or I'm just totally diluted but I think I I think my body doesn't stink much I I have a but I may be wrong about that I may just have really friendly people around me well you know how all Factory senses work right uh they work on change they don't work on you don't recognize like distinct smells that last like uh say if you're like living in an area that stinks you know how those people get used to the smell of baby yeah oh no not necessarily because baby shit's not in front of you all the time but things that are around you all the time like your own Funk or how your house smells you're you become immune to it unless there's like like if you have a

84:45house like if you ever had a cat pissing your house yeah yeah annoying bed dude and you like walking around like where the is it and I'm walking around like a goddamn dog trying to find out where my cat pissed especially when I used to have a carpet yeah it's gross cuz you never knew where they pissed and then you never really totally got it out of there and then they know you never got it out of there so they find that spot and pee on it again wretched Little Creatures wretched Little Creatures I I had a cat in college I'd moved into this shared apartment with this woman and uh she had this cat named Mau who was beautiful cat big big sort of whis scars and just a lovely beautiful cat she fan of Communism I don't know I think it was more like a meow meow thing but the cat would like get on a table and you put his paws on your shoulders and just rub his face on your face and you'd be like

85:34oh what a great cat and then he would just you just freak out and like hit you in the face and scratch you and run away like oh this cat's right probably got acid somebody with cat I think yeah cuz it was one of these hippie houses where you know people were moving through all the time and oh happies anyway so I ended up hooking up with this woman and I remember one time we're in my bed and we're having sex and the cat walks in and he looks at me and he backs up to my bookshelf and just oh my God all over my while holding eye contact with me whoa that's disturbing uh I think he had a thing with this woman and I was oh for sure you had a thing with her because he's probably if he sprang he's probably not fixed right no he wasn't fixed you gota first of all you got to fix those cats because with they walk in on you they're going to get horny they're freaks yeah especially

86:30male cats that don't they don't get fixed they all spray yeah all of them I mean female cats they get in the Heat and they start mowing sticking their ass up in the air yeah I told the story about my sexual experience with a cat did you see the animation that guy did to that no I did not who did it which guy I don't remember his name but it's it's on YouTube and it is so poly tun dude it's an animator in in Peru and he wrote to me he's he's not Peruvian but he's based there but he wrote to me and he's like hey man would you mind if I did an animation of some sto a story you tell on your podcast I was like yeah go ahead that's great like you don't need my permission right but he picked the one of me and you and Duncan and I'm telling the story about this cat and the pencil and the cats humping the pencil and all this it's like dude you picked the one story

87:20like I don't really want the world like The Joe Rogan audience will get it my audience will get it but I don't know that like Twitter universe is going to get it so I feel bad cuz you put a lot of work into it but I haven't really like pushed to promote it much you know um it's really what you're saying but I think your your fears are unfounded you think so yeah the people don't get you come across you're hilarious in this Jamie if you could find this thing it's called uh it's on my YouTube channel I remember the story it's something about if you just Google Christopher Ryan a cat with a pencil it'll probably come up and if it doesn't I'd love to see what else does we had a cat that was in heat before she got fixed we got her fixed like right when she got into heat but you would pet her and she would like lift her ass up in the air just like like as soon as you gave her any

88:09affection and if you spank her they love to get spanked too Jesus Christ yeah I had a cat who would like hold on to the sofa and I'd spank her pretty hard and then I'd like fake spank her and she'd fall off cuz she was already compensating for it it's our only trick oh my God so you were like beating her off by spanking her you know I like basically right I like to give animals pleasure mhm and normally the way that expresses itself like in Spain in our apartment in Spain I built this whole cat world like I built I got this big piece of Driftwood and I wrapped um climbing rope around it so they can climb straight up this thing and then there's a series of shelves along the ceiling so they jump around and they can go all around the room and Chase each other and hang out up up there when you're having a party they're like up there just hanging out watching

88:55people and cuz they're you know that's where they want to be right and then on the Terrace I built this big tree thing that they go on and there's a hammock in it and the cats get in the hammock and swing and so I love like seeing animals happy right you know I mean maybe in a way my whole my the things I write are trying to make people happy cuz what I'm trying to do is get people in their natural environment that's what I'm trying that's what I'm writing about you know and so with cats it's the same way I want them to be I want them to I want to create a jungle for them and a world and it's so cool because we had three cats and they once you build this world for them they leave you alone they're not like people think cats are like oh you know it's all pathetic it's you know I come home and and it's all if you have three cats they have their own life and

89:42they're happy to interact with you when you want to but when you don't want to they're doing their thing you know wow it's really it's really good all right Jamie you find it they're interesting little animals man the relationships that people have with their cats it's very okay here we go what is that it's like all this crazy and I'm going to come on well don't don't watch the whole thing this is this one's got like a laugh track on it on I think huh maybe not no no the laugh track he added that just that's cuz I was talking about doing this gig in Hollywood oh okay so it's called Uh nine and a half lives with Dr Christopher Ryan if you look it up why is it not you should see the image of you though you're sitting just like this oh there you are let's hear some of itory so the story is okay I'm 8 years old it's the 70s and uh are going to a bridge party at their friend's place and

90:36so there's no babysitter they take me station wagon and yeah it's like you know Love American Style The Brady Bunch those days if anyone's old enough to remember that anyway so I'm I'm like hey they they put me in the basement in the the family room and they say keep the door closed cuz the cat's in heat right I don't know what the that means I think it means the cat's hot so they've got the AC on keep the door closed I don't know so I go down I watching TV and this cat is just like all over the place rubbing her ass on my leg and just like looking at me and she's like really CU somebody scratch my itch you know and I look down and there's this pencil on the table next to the the sofa oh no you didn't unsharp and I take the pencil and with the Eraser down I just hold it there right and cat backs up on this eraser and starts humping this eraser no freaks me out rips the inside of her

91:28apart with that little metal casing no no but you know what male cat penises have spines that come out on when on withdrawal that does rip up the inside of the female blood has to mix with cat seam into to fertiliz cats that's why they scream like that at night what happened was I pulled the pencil away cuz it was freaking me out and then the cat turns around it looks me like yo what hey what are you doing you know come on and like like really like shocked and and disappointed and I was like well I don't know so I put it back down again the cat backs up on it starts this pencil again and this time I hold on and then she comes and have orgasms oh yeah and she like rolls over and looks at me like looking her face and looks at me with love and gratitude it's the first sexual experience I ever had and you didn't put your you didn't I was penis against the cat I I was 8

92:24years old I wasn't I was experiencing it as an idea I wasn't feeling it as a sexual thing right you yeah yeah when you were like you probably did that oh I every cat in the neighborhood yeah did you no isn't that great what a great St Dave Anderson Bloods sausage. co.uk what a he's great that that animation is amazing it's perfect I mean I've probably seen it 20 times and every time I see details I mean if you you freeze that frame of The Brady Bunch or the you know Love American Style or whatever it was like every one of those characters and I'd love to know how accurate his tattoo is because of your arm and do you have a t-shirt that says how dare you no I don't it's just a phrase you use occas I just say it all the time uh I don't think the tattoos were accurate I didn't recognize them but whatever it was amazing you know the Duncan thing with the little pyramid with the floating

93:22above it sitting in front of him all the time and he's wearing a sarap yeah that guy's great and yeah what do yeah they're definitely not correct but um the uh the other thing was the car how the car was bouncing up and down you were driving and it's got the wood siding you know it's like he he got the 70s everyone's wearing like leisure suits and smoking cigarettes and it's really well done anyway I what the was that oh we're talking about giving cats pleasure and making animals Happ buddy of mine who used to jerk off his Rott wi with his foot he used to put his foot on his Rott W's dick and he would like rub it back and forth and Rott wi would come yeah and uh I told my girlfriend at the time it's a long time ago and she was so mad she was so disgusted like that is disgusting and I was like why is it disgusting the guy's just beating off his dog like the dog can't do it if the

94:13dog could do it he would do it himself so he's like a friend J his friend do dog can lick his own balls pretty easily uh yeah that's true but I don't think that's enough I think he needed more so my friend used to beat him off with his foot put foot on dog I think there's like a female sex toy you can get for male dogs oh yeah there's like a thing that that makes sense like a Fleshlight for dogs that makes sense keep it from humping your leg yeah why not I mean you want them to be happy there was this controversy uh not too long ago a woman wrote a book about you know John Lily Jamie just yeah I know what you're talking about I know look at this hot doll the sex dog doll for dogs and it's shaped like a dog and you just got to get your horny dog and just back him up onto that wow that's hilarious push him forward on that I should say yeah back the up onto him yeah well why

95:10don't they just make like uh one of them real dolls for a dog give it hair like the American Werewolf in London out there something like that where the dog doesn't feel dirty like he's got to some machine cuz they didn't put any any like work whatsoever in the Aesthetics do you think the dogs care they might it might feel better for them they might get a little more excited if it looked like a real dog and you could give it like a soundtrack a little just how we like looking over her shoulder oh please please please give me that doggy dick doggy style yeah uh yeah the do the woman who jerked off the dolphin yes that's well what's fascinating about that story is this woman was living with a young adolescent male dolphin and this adolescent male dolphin would they were trying to get the dolphin to talk in a flooded house yeah in a flooded house so she lived in

96:01a place where she would uh like have waste high water everywhere she went so the dolphin could swim freely through the house and live with her but the dolphin was horny all the time and so he didn't want to do his studies right so what she did was she beat him off and when word got out that she beat off the dolphin they canceled all the research is that what I thought it the research well they got in trouble they got in TR but recently because she talked about it recently when she wrote a book about the time and she was working with John Lily who went on to invent this sensory deprivation tank well no he I I think he' already invented it at the time he was on like one of the first iterations of it and he was also giving acid to dolphins right so it might have been that yeah that it was one of those things that led to them pulling the plug on the research she was either she was

96:46jerking it off and they found out and they were also I think the defense department was using his research to train dolphins to kill in Vietnam and to plant bombs and suicide bombs and suicide bomb they would train they were training them to Suicide bomb unbelievable which is crazy it's crazy that they they felt like that was well I guess look man when you're in war you're already deciding that you're killing people so the idea of killing dolphins to kill people it's like and they didn't think of dolphins the way we think of dolphins today either like that that might be something the military would still be interested in doing I don't know I mean maybe they are doing it they're just telling usuck up a lot of whales with all their sonar testing yeah cuz they do these intense sound waves in the underwater and the the whales have very sensitive sound reception organs so it blast

97:38them and you know does it give them like ttis or some I don't know like a rock band yeah could be the lead singer of AC DC can't do shows anymore Pete Pete uh Townsen yeah really he can't hear anything yeah Pete Townsen is almost deaf too right been de for a while yeah the lead singer of ACDC his ears are so up he can't tour anymore yeah I can't go to concerts man like I I've been to a few concerts recent I mean never it's not a question of being old I hear that getting older noise bothers you more but I've always been annoyed by noise and especially like where they're playing so loud that it's distorting the speakers it's like you're that's not that doesn't sound good right right being louder isn't better but I don't know it's a weird yeah but there's a thing that people like to do they like to know that they're really partying man that's it really party turn it up to

98:3411 you know and I think those are the people that need to go to the gym need a heavy bag house yeah that's it see this is it this keys back into me being a lazy hippie I like moderate sound I don't need it all the way up get something to beat up you yeah and stopped it get it out so you ever been to the sultan sea speaking no I have not but I saw that you were there recently I was there like a ago yeah it you should come out there man it's an intense post-apocalyptic scene out there did you see the it was John Waters did a documentary on it I believe no I don't know there was a scene in Into the Wild where he the kid is there do you remember that he's hanging out with some hippies in like a desert that was in the salt and sea yeah he was in Slab City which is in the salt and sea oh wow yeah I've got my buddy ta does a this year is the second uh Bombay Beach

99:28be alley he's doing oh look at that that's that guy Salvation Mountain that's that guy that has been making this mountain yeah out of uh art and like painting it for years it's all about God and Jesus and love and yeah he mixes paint and straw in mud and uh he built this whole thing yeah it's crazy structure he's been working on for decades right yeah he died a couple years ago oh he she's hot is that Kristen Stewart yeah oh yeah yeah her dad used to be the uh one of the the producer guys on uh Fear Factor he was like I don't know what his official title was but he was like the guy who got everything together like got everybody in place and made sure everything was running like big job yeah he was like the guy on the street like while everything was going on really good dude fun guy crazy man and that's uh that's his daughter huh and I was always like dude shouldn't have your kid

100:30act She's So Young seems crazy she'll never make it yeah meanwhile she was a Twilight girl became like one of the most famous actresses H see I never saw her until Saturday Night Live a couple days ago oh really yeah what was she on Satur was she doing on there she hosted oh no kidding this last yeah just this she got some new movie coming out or something I don't know what she was doing I don't know what she was promoting if anything I didn't catch it I just watched it because the that scene with Kathy bats doing uh Sean Spicer did you see that no but I heard it was awesome I haven't seen it Megan McCarthy not Kathy oh Megan McCarthy Kath I keep saying Kathy Bates it's I don't think it's Megan McCarthy it's Melissa McCarthy son of a correcting you're correct young Jamie I think that that show Satur live is all the evidence we need that Donald Trump needs to do mushrooms

101:21he keeps twe about Bal doing that sketch about him and saying it's not funny dude why are we laughing tell me what's going on why we laughing like if someone's on you look it doesn't feel good I know it doesn't feel good but it is funny yeah you know and Alec Balwin does do a amazing impression it's his best work right it's right up there with that whole closers get coffee oh uh Glen glary Glen Glen Ross yeah mean that rant that he did in that movie insane epic right I think this Trump Impressions right up there yeah it's really good it's really good and it's getting better too the more he does the better he looks more and more like him yeah you know what does it say there bad news for Trump cant live in the midst of a ratings Renaissance of course it is and that's one of the reasons why you know the Sater live is like a show that goes in Cycles you know you

102:11have these cycles of greatness and then you know it's like they try to find themselves people leave new people struggle a little bit there's always something good there but it's almost like uh it's really it's got to be insanely difficult to create a new show every week insane yeah you know total Doggy Dog environment too yeah and even like you look if you go back and look at uh videos from The Glory Days you know the Dan aoy days and you know John Belushi and all that there was still a lot of filler in there oh for sure you know we remember the trout tomatic and you know the the Great Moments the samurai John balushi Samurai character exactly you couldn't do that anymore that' be cultural appropriation that would be you couldn't do you probably couldn't do the were two wild and crazy guys I don't know I mean they were white you know right they were white but they were definitely foreign

102:58because you do Borat could you do Borat today I don't know I mean Borat was just a few years ago right yeah but it might be different if he tried it today incredibly racist my God and he's like a he's like an orthodox Jew that guy the the comedian who does Borat is he really yeah he's like a seriously religious you know honor the shabat and all that kind of stuff serious Jewish practicing Jew I forgot his real name he's Ali G to me yeah s ex Ali G Ali G's his best work when he would interview people and they didn't know he was Ali G he can't do that anymore but when he interviewed like he interviewed uh Buzz ald no who explained humor to him right that was one of the greatest moments ever he's explaining humor while he's in the midst of a joke that he doesn't know is happening poor Buzz poor Buzz poor Buzz got owned yeah but you know who my favorite uh one of the few where he

103:59wasn't getting own was Ralph nater oh remember that one yeah Ralph nater just kind of went with them well what happened was so Ali G's doing this whole thing where they're talking about the environment and global warming and he says well but you know isn't a major cause of global warming the cow farts and so shouldn't we just you know put balloons on cows and you he gets into this whole thing right and Ralph nater's looking at him and you can see when the balloons on the cow's asses thing comes out Ralph nater's like I oh wait a minute and so he just sort of when Alig finishes talking he says well you know scientists have been working on that but it's very hard to develop a valve that perfectly fits a cow's and then and then it cuts right it just cuts and then the next scene like after commercial whatever you see Alig and Ralph Nat rapping together oh that's

104:52hilarious yeah it's really did he do one of those with Trump mhm but Trump walked out Trump walked out let's play this and I'll be a fool very quick we get in trouble but the most are we going to get in trouble right now hold on hold on what are we doing hold on he's going to do something why are we getting in trouble well we get our pulled from YouTube all the time if it has content in from someone else's video oh really yeah you can't even play the audio so what is the problem with ice cream are people listening to this audio will audio will but YouTube people are not so we're we're watching this and Donald Trump is getting upset at Ali G people are just hearing silence kill it then this is stupid to do it this way yeah yeah it's um whenever someone's content gets played like any anybody who owns this video we play their video we get pulled off of YouTube yeah this is

105:54one that would get us yanked and then what do you do you have to go like cut it out cut it out put it back up yeah yeah it's uh I get it you know I get it they want people to but we always try to tell people to go to that video that's it you're sending traffic their way right but it's funny go find it go find it and yeah that's funny I didn't know Sasha Baron con was is he a practicing Orthodox to I believe so yeah interesting yeah it is it's interesting cuz you think of comics as I I mean I think of do you know other religious Comics H cuz there's an irreverent an intellectual irreverence there are a few there are a few um Jim Gaffigan's Catholic oh yeah he's that's sort of his stick right I don't know if it's atick I think he's actually a practicing Catholic how much of that is legit his sort of identity I don't mean it's not legit I just mean like he's the

106:47family man he definitely is yeah what does this is this him Sasha Baron Cohen says I wouldn't say I'm a religious man I'm proud of my Jewish identity and there are certain things I do and Customs I keep okay he tries to keep kosher and attends synagogue about twice a year he tries to keep coacher but he's not saying he's wouldn't say he's a religious Jew but he tries to keep coacher all right yeah that sounds like he's halfway in got one foot in one foot out I mean you got to think about the movies he makes you can't you can only be so religious and make movies yeah yeah I don't know I this whole thing about Comics thinking differently uh Saturday I was at um Jake Johansson's house he does this cinjun cooking every Christmas and uh I was there and there was a guy uh Haney comic lasty um ah Alan Haney havy havy yeah yeah Alan havy uh who I recognize from Madman and you know and

107:51then since I met him I've seen him everywhere he's on that the men in the High Castle and all these shows anyway so we're there and we're talking and we were talking about this thing we're talking about the Stan Hope by the way I didn't finish that Cliffhanger thing but if someone wants to listen to something go check those two episodes out do you remember the names of the episode called Cliffhangers yeah um but it's very intense huh it's very intense anyway so we're talking about this and I said uh you guys seen this movie The Aristocrats cuz it's really about how Comics think differently you know like how nothing is offensive and they're like yeah yeah that's a great movie and that really gets to it and you know whatever the conversation continues so then I go home and a couple days later I'm sitting there and I had a copy of the aristocrats and I thought I haven't

108:37seen that since it came out I'm going to watch it so I watched the aristocrats they're both in the movie and neither one of them says anything to me right so it's again it's this La thing where everything's the opp opposite of of what I consider normal so in La I thought about this a lot cuz it was so shocking to me that they were just like oh yeah it's a great film and then I'm watching like there they are right how do you not say oh we're in that movie right how do you not say that it can only be that in La like name dropping is so uncool that cool becomes what you don't say yeah could be that that definitely could be it cuz people see famous people all the time in LA so it's like if you're like oh I saw Joe Rogan in the supermarket people are like yeah yeah whatever man it could also be that some people don't like talking about their work some people some people avoid

109:35talking about especially like talking about the work of standup when they're not talking to a standup yeah that I do that really yeah yeah so you would just you wouldn't mention that you were in the movie If I could get away with not mention it I might I might just scirt out of there that's funny man I cuz I'm you I'm still a small town boy cuz to me it's like you're in a movie holy man to you I would certainly tell you that I was in that movie if you brought it up but you're my friend but if I didn't know you and some weirdo at a party I got to take a chance with just talking about standup to you oh yeah yeah it's good movie all right hey look at over there chips gotta go cheese puffs my favorite yeah so I get cornered sometimes I mean you've been cornered sometimes by people that just want to ask questions at you like their interview so what's going like like right now I

110:23get a million people that want to Corner me and ask me UFC questions UFC just sold for some astronomical $4 billion doll whatever it is figure right and uh so everybody wants to talk to me what's it like with the new owners what's it's like oh gotta go Gotta Go yeah you become like uh someone that you're you're instead of having a conversation with people like you're they're interviewing you yeah yeah and it's one-on-one it's not going out on TV or something it's not even that it's like I I don't you know I don't necessarily want to talk about my work details and issues like what's it like working with my new bosses like yeah okay yeah who gives a man you know do you compartmentalize a lot I mean is there the UFC part of your life and there's the standup part of your life it has to be the UFC because I don't swear I very very rarely like say or something

111:13is that hard no no it's not very hard I just uh I just I don't think it's necessary you know like but I mean to keep cuz you're used to talking freely on the podcast is it I don't mean does it bother you just like it I didn't think you meant that I mean even difficult no it's not difficult cuz it is a different totally different mindset cuz I'm I'm never trying to be funny like do you remember when like Dennis Miller used to host Monday Night Football yeah he did it for a little bit people got so mad cuz he was trying to be funny he was cracking jokes he intersec and I remember remembering that and I didn't even watch it but I remember people were like really pissed at Dennis Miller and I thought about it and I was like well I don't do that and I'm not going to do that and it's like he you know Dennis is a joke writer he's a he's got he's a joke teller I have I have bits you know it's

112:05kind of a different kind of comedy in the first place but then on top of that it's like that thing that's going on to me doesn't require much of me what it requires is me to explain things that's it so it doesn't require person ity or flare or senses of humor or a unique points of view other than unless I recognize something like a pattern that's happening in a fight that allows the people at home to enjoy it more and it allows the person who's fighting the two people that are fighting it it represents them in an honorable way so that's my goal that's all I'm trying to do when I'm there I'm just trying to do my best to to give Justice to what I'm seeing and to you do a great job of that I mean I don't even I'm not into UFC I've started watching it since I've been hanging out with you you know and and I've gotten to know some of the personalities and I've watched the whole

112:57Ronda Rousey thing and the you know this guy the Irish guy Conor McGregor you yeah yeah so it's it's pretty compelling uh and I think you do a very good job of that your ego isn't in play at all no it can't be try I try as just reporting yeah I try as much possible to stay outside of it I mean I'm a I'm I'm thinking because I want to I mean I'm constantly trying to stay on the ball but uh at my best I'm just doing it you know it's like I I have to be just tuned in well rested well fed hyped up ready to go it's a cuz it's a sixh hour thing so I sit down for 6 hours and often times it's it's always at least 10 fights it's usually 11 or 12 can you do all you do all of them just bring you in for the last few no I actually like doing it that way cuz what happens is I get warmed up so I do like the first CU like sometimes fighting is so crazy you have to go oh yeah okay there's a fight

113:55going on you know like you're sitting I mean even though I've done it I've called at least a thousand fights probably closer to 2,000 fight I don't know how many actual fights have been in front of while doing comedy or commentary rather but it's at least a thousand let's say it's probably 1,500 or something but even though that's the case to this day when one starts I I go okay this is a fight this is what's going on and by the fifth fight of the night I'm totally in the groove and I'm just laser focused concentrating on the action trying to pick the right words trying to describe it in the right way and trying to give that uh give that perspective to someone at home that might not be seeing something that I might be seeing yeah well especially all the the wrestling grappling techniques sh that's a big part of it that's a big part of it people are used to seeing

114:41boxing and they know what an uppercut is or a hook or whatever but yeah when they get on the ground I have no idea what's going on and you're talking about the armar and you know this and that yeah that's the most difficult are you below the stage or you so you're look up do you see what's going on on the other yeah yeah well sometimes I don't see like if the referee stands in front of me and then I have to look at monitors so I have two monitors in front of me that give me two completely different angles do you get splattered by sweat blood blood I've had blood splatter on me before yeah I've got it in my mouth before one guy was talking to me and his nose was uh broken and every time he was talking it sprayed and I felt some of it go on my lips it's like ye yikes you're like on TV live television you can't be like cut give me a ride oh no I mean he was talking to me blood was

115:26coming out of his mouth Jesus yeah I've gotten sprayed like that's a easy part you know their their job is was difficult like that's someone's blood yeah like that the guy getting hit and they're all tested HIV and all that you're not everything everything everything everything and uh you know guys have been stopped from fighting because of certain things that have come up in those tests m uh diseases and all kinds of yeah yeah sure hepatitis for sure some organizations have you know pulled guys off cards CU they found they have well you should that go blood to blood you're that's a bad thing to be getting staff infections are a real big deal too sometimes people will get staff from the fighter they're fighting and you find out the guy had a like a sore a staff sore and he wasn't alerting anybody to it that happens biotic resistant now yep yeah yeah yeah stuff is scary stuff and it's

116:18one of those things that sort of rarely gets discussed but um super important to keep healthy skin Flora I tell people this is one of the most important aspects of it don't use antibacterial soap yeah don't do it you're going to ruin your skin Flora just you're you're agent oranging your whole skin like don't do it people think they're going to be healthier that way oh I'm just going to use antibacterial and that way I won't to get any diseases you'll get like crazy warts on your hands and like you got to be real careful with that stuff yeah you don't want to kill that Flora yeah you know the Flora this is something I researched for this book that cerian section is a big problem yeah because you don't get the vaginal bath of uh skin flora and also intestinal they've actually rubbed vaginal like whatever that jazz is on babies post birth that have been given

117:06cian sections just to sort of get it on them cuz if you don't it gets colonized by whatever's floating around in the air and you don't want what's floating in the air in the hospital yeah you know yeah it is a crazy thing you know that there's a process and we don't we don't we think there some details of that process we can we can skirt around that one we don't have to blow the out no no no we're just going to go through the roof we're going to pop up a sun roof on that and just and I've got a golf on Monday so let's do this you know stitch them up everything's going to be fine she looks great in the vagina retains its 100% elasticity godam it's like I mean we have to acknowledge we're a couple of guys here never going to have our taint slit so I mean I get it too I get it 100% but it's tough yeah but I have a friend uh his wife like specifically was saying

117:52a baby is not blowing my out not going to happen she she's going through the roof no matter what I get it it's so it's such a primitive way to give birth yeah you know you know the weirdest one is the hyena the hyena that gives birth out of that fake dick yeah the big clits H have massive well it's a faux penis I mean it literally looks like a giant dick it's just and they're bigger that's what's up about them they have a baby out of that thing too and they ride the mail and try to them with that fake dick weird animal Mano we're so lucky we don't have I was in Africa since I saw you oh what did you do over there yeah so I was in Mexico first then I was in Thailand for 6 weeks uh and then I was in southern Africa I did a 10day safari wow in Namibia Botswana yeah how was that uh I wouldn't do the same thing again uh it was a it was cool it was the Wild dog

118:52safaris who do this sort of like uh lowbudget get in the van and sleep intense at night kind of thing right and I picked this like massive 1,500 mile whatever like seea all of southern Africa you know which was dumb because you're just sitting in a van most of the time what kind of shots did you have to get I didn't get any shots for that really yeah no there's no yellow fever there there's some malaria but I've been in lots of places with malaria and I just avoid mosquitoes how do you do that you don't uh you have a make sure you have a good net on your bed uh you wear long sleeve light colored clothing light colored like white or something like that white so they really are attracted to darker colors well I think it's cuz you don't see them you know if you're if you have a white sleeve you'll see them landing and flying around oh I see you're just constantly on the alert for

119:41little disease carrying monsters yeah and also you know I'll occasionally use some of the DDT on my ankles and my uh neck and stuff stuff um but the other thing is you eat a lot of raw garlic oh I I've heard that that's real that does work well I mean that's I've been doing it for years when I was on the road backpacking in You Know Places tropical places I was eating raw garlic every day which is really good for your intestines by the way your in intestinal flora and all that but your skin smells like garlic yeah you start sweating it out right away oh I smell like garlic all the time people complain I I love the smell I like it too but it's not good on your breath right agreed well what what you do is you chop it up right put it throw it in your mouth and drink it down with water you don't chew it chewing it's what gives you the breath cuz it gets in your teeth so if you take it like

120:29pills you'll get the garlic Belch and you get the garlic skin but you don't get the garlic breath I would feel like I'm cheating because uh I'm kind of a glutton for those uncomfortable moments when you know you're doing something good like you're chomping down the garlic and you feel those juices hit your tongue and you're like who you feel that your nose starts opening up like mix it with some fresh ginger I just throw it down man yeah I I anytime there's any feeling at all of stomach disease disease or if I feel bad I know I'm feel like I'm a little rundown I just choke down a bunch of cloves of garlic the other day I did it and it hit me so hard I had to take a knee I was like oh yeah like as it was going down I was like whoa I mean I could have stood up if I wanted to but I wanted to sit down for dramatic purposes like wow you're praising the good Lord gar oh my

121:22goodness garlic what are you doing to my insides I had a horrendous stomach virus right around New Year's yeah I went through my New Year's Eve show convinced I was going to myself I was like this going to be a point in this show where I'm just going to have to myself and and I thought about it all day before the show I didn't eat anything I didn't eat anything all day yeah like uh from the moment I woke up to the moment I went to bed I mean I was having broken fire hydrant experiences in the toilet liquid yeah it was just like where is all this coming from right you know like I I couldn't believe it as it was happen losing weight by the minute it was blowing out of me something inside of me was terrible like whatever it was was terrible I had these farts that were they they smelled like fermented fruit and death like death mixed with this fermented sulfur like

122:16like the most rotten meat you could like if you opened up like a a refrigerator and the power had gone off while you were on vacation you came back and there was some hamburger meat that was rotten it smelled like that and like like sulfur and like uh sweet like a vinegary almost like a fermented sort of a a smell to it was horrendous sulfurous belches were you getting sulfurous it was all going on inside my stomach cuz I wasn't eating much and it was something that went around through my whole house my my littlest daughter got I mean I didn't know what she was going through but she was just constantly complaining about her stomach being really awful for like a whole week we were skiing in Aspen and that's when it when it kicked in and when I get back I was like oh no like this is bad have you ever had have you ever had an event on stage like like a wet fart or something or like uhoh no

123:11I haven't but interestingly enough there's a new law that just got well it might be proposed a new rule got proposed for the unified rules of mixed martial arts where if you yourself they stop the fight which has happened before guys have themselves like in the middle of a fight just like loss of spincter control yeah man sometimes you got to go like sometimes it's diarrhea some can kick you in the gut and just blasted out the back there was a guy named Michael Chessa who is a very good fighter and he was fighting benil darush I believe yes that's what the fight was and benil dar it was a big because I remember it was a big victory for him because he choked benil darush shout which was uh giant cuz B benil Dar is like super respected Jiu-Jitsu black belt and Michael Chessa as he got into the Octagon looked over me goes dude I might my pants he goes I might

124:00my pants right right while the fight's going on I'm like seriously I was like took my headphones off like seriously he's like yeah I'm going to my pants and so like okay I know and so like I'm holding this in the back of my head I'm like I definitely shouldn't bring it up unless it becomes an issue cuz I don't want the public to like dwell on that I want them to enjoy this great fight and then he got through without myself and then you know I asked him after like off mic I'm like did you almost yourself he's like dude he goes I came out of here I was convinced I was going to myself I used to get like before I would go on a TV show or do a big public speaking thing where there were going to be a lot of people there I would like 5 10 minutes before I was supposed to go on stage I'd be like I need to take a dump like I need to do it right now I've taken a few dumps

124:42here sorry about that I'm more I'm more relaxed now it's what it's for but I think there's a it's like a you know fight ORF flight thing I think animals get that too it's like oh this is I got to like get my together literally and get it out of me so I'm light yeah you know there was a well it's also your body does not want to waste any resources dealing with that CU it feels like there's like some catastrophe about to take place there's a video of these two bears these giant bears and it was uh in that movie Grizzly Man that crazy dude love that great movie but these two bears are fighting and while they're fighting start yeah because their body is just like look whatever this is get it out get it out we're going to war here we're not processing yeah no no thought whatsoever and no resources yeah drawn away from the muscles to process the food cuz have you

125:32ever done that like eating a big meal and try to work out I never try to work out but if you did no no I know what you mean you're heavy you got nothing there's no energy no energy it's it's fascinating cuz it's like like you it's almost like if you were a pie chart you could like there's a segment of that chart that is now missing you can kind of do it you can kind of work out but you definitely can't like run a marathon or anything crazy you can't I mean if if you do you'll you'll be hurting oh the whm Hof man you know he's been on your show a bunch of times I hung out with him for like a week in the Pyrenees and went up to his place in Holland and like sort of became friends I mean that's an example of what I'm talking about I want to know these people you know like when I reached out to them they were like yeah we'll set up a thing you can do a Skype and I was like I don't want

126:18to do a Skype I want to meet this dude you know like tell me give me a day I'll fly to Holland right I was in Spain at the time so it wasn't a big flight but anyway I was talking to him about it and it's like he's running all these marathons in the desert with no water and in the Arctic and you know yeah yeah but the dude doesn't work out no he runs marathons he doesn't work out he doesn't run because I hate running yeah I'm like well how do you run a marathon if you don't train he's like oh it's just the mind yeah I don't know what he's talking about I ran a 5K and I was ready to die I run up the driveway out of breath I I don't run and I ran a 5K and I was like wow this is actually difficult I'm like I'm in great shape I'm like this I'm going to be able to do this I work out all the time I'm like I'm just going to go on this run it's going to be just a thing I do uh-uh cuz

127:07you're not used to using those muscles in that way or was it was it cardiopulmonary waffle covered with peanut butter and then covered with maple syrup I gave myself an excuse I'm like I'm run this crazy RAC I'm going to carb up but my body's just not used to eating that nonsense so I think it it had shut down production of a lot of key ingredients there was definitely that I was feeling it like while I was running I was I could feel like the the gases from the waffle coming up my throat I can taste it kick it in the peanut butter and syrup together so much sugar yeah um but it's all just you know your feet your feet aren't used to running on it was on concrete you know it's like the whole thing is weird yeah and the shocks on your knees and your ankles you ever read Born to Run you know book no no but I I I do know the premise of it Christoper McDougle it's about the the

127:58way shoes running shoes are developed yeah and how our bodies are designed to run on the balls of our feet and he goes down in the lives with the Tarahumara Indians in Mexico and the Baran Del cob where I was in 1988 I was back there with those Indians and they run into like really thin shoes or Barefoot Barefoot or they make these sandals out of tire you know and it's just strapped on their foot it's just a thing yeah and they run forever yeah well that's how the body's meant and I mean we're meant to use the foot as this amazing shock absorber you know you land on the ball of the foot IT muscle that's what the calf muscles for yeah and also the arch and there all these bones it's yeah yeah it's crazy one short it's like the birth thing saw this thing yesterday the sock it's it's the same thing I mean it's supposed to be replacing that Barefoot feel feeling I suppose it's a really

128:49expensive sock it's like 80 bucks just a sock what kind of a it's made it shows at the end of the video it shows what it's made of it's got some sort of sprayed polymer that's like 15 times stronger than steel whoa so you can like do rock climbing tight RPP walking you can run outside and it's just as uh guess it feels like Silk it's it feels just like a sock holy I'm pretty interested in it I don't know how legit it is but let's get it it's pretty new I work out Barefoot most of the time I work out Barefoot when I do kickboxing work out Barefoot if I do Jiu-Jitsu work out Barefoot if I lift weights I do almost everything Barefoot occasionally I'll do like a elliptical machine or something like that with shoes on but I feel like when you are Barefoot like I do yoga Barefoot obviously I feel like when you're Barefoot you could feel your toes are like digging into the ground

129:34they're all engaging right I just it I feel like it makes a big difference and a lot of the nervous system terminates in the sole of the feet so there's in Chinese medicine there's a lot of uh um attention paid you know a reflexology is about how you know is that real I don't know how real it is but it is real that the a lot of the nervous system terminates at the soles of the feet that's why foot massage feels so good and so the theory is with this Barefoot is that by having that experience you're describing where your toes are digging in and you're feeling your weight being you know shifting in different parts of your foot having that part of your body alive and active is really good for your overall psychological health and nervous health makes sense does make sense yeah it just feels good to do feel like you're into things feel good for a reason right you know we're evolved to

130:29to have them feel good CU it's good for us which brings us back to beating off or one of those dog things I think drinking off a dog with a I wonder we should call that company and ask questions and they say like what kind of dog do you have oh I don't have a dog yeah this nefarious intentions I just like watching dogs robots it's just for yeah dogs that wander by yeah my uh friend Joe when I was growing up Joe Spagnola he had a um he had a a dog that was just like really ornery little dog and this dog had a stuffed animal that it would and it would just bite this stuffed animal and the out of it and you'd come over his house Joe spags he'd go over his house and his dog would be the out of this stuffed you're like who dude how he clean it I don't know man you couldn't even go near that thing that dog like he would get ferocious if he tried to get near his stuffed animal he's a

131:29little tiny ass dog too I don't remember what he was well it's like your friend with a restraining order man love is love you know there's no way around it what are you going to do but that dog was obsessed like that was his world his world is like biting the stuffed animal and just booking the out of it yeah hey somebody asked me to raise an issue with you okay uh apparently you've you're under the impression that everyone died at 30 in prehistory is that true uh I I joke around about that all the time that lifespans were incredibly low a long time ago people live to be like 30 you know it's a hyperbole for the most part okay I know I know people did leave love live longer but the age that people died the average age was much lower than it is today just because lots of babies died so it's a is that all it is yeah it's a mathematical average but our species design by has

132:19evolved to live into our 60s and 70s and hunter gatherers who get through the first few years where there's a lot of risk oh so it's a youth thing oh so it's all rounded out it's a math thing yeah oh that's interesting so I was under the impression that you know people just got died of violence and a lot of diseases by the time they were in their 30s no most of the diseases that we suffer from are the result of Agriculture so you look at all the major killers of of humans you know swine flu from pigs right chickenpox from chickens obviously Aven bird all the flu come from domesticated go back to that Jamie what are you posting up there human lifespan nearly constant for 2,000 years whoa so like ultimate lifespan but what I was talking about mostly is disease and violence yeah the the violence thing is over represented if you unless you live in Mongolia if you read the yes what is

133:13it 75 yeah I don't know if that looks prehistory is this not good okay a life expectancy for men in 1907 was 45 years 45 years by 1957 it Rose to 66 2007 it reached 75 unlike the most recent increase in life expectancy which is attributed largely to a decline in half of the leading causes of death including heart disease homicide and influenza the increase in life expectancy between 1907 and 2007 would largely due to the decreasing decreasing infant mortality rate which is like 99.99% that's interesting so what that is like is like the wage Gap uh the gender wage Gap issue right where a lot of people say they they love to quote that thing that say that men make so much more money than women that women make sort of 80 cents to the dollar right but they're doing different jobs right so like you think about it you go wow there's an injustice going on and then you realize

134:09like well maybe there is some sexism but this is not what they're talking about when they're saying this they're talking about different jobs um the men are at higher risk they die more often on the job men like when they're they almost exclusively populate the community of Miners and you know Lumberjacks and like that where people get hit by trees right yeah and women take time off when they have kids and they also work Less hours they're less crazy you know some men will work themselves to death where very few women will take it to there certainly are plenty of examples of men and women doing exactly the same job and women are getting paid less I'm sure it must happen but it's not statistically sign statistically it's not what you're talking and you know what they attribute that from the when women get less they think that one thing to be considered when you look at

134:54that is that women might not be as aggressive when they're negotiating a starting salary right and that men may be more confident and of their worth you know more cocky with how they uh who knows though I don't but it's one of those things so I was under the impression that people did die yeah well most people are under that impression I've I've had I've spoke you know given talks at medical schools and stuff and all these doctors think that everyone died at 35 a 35-year-old was old that's interesting and they're like and it works its way into medicine where they're like okay look the reason you have chronic back pain is that the human body was not evolved to live beyond 35 and so of course you have wear and tear and things like that's totally false the human bodies evolved to live into the 70s so it's a statistical thing it's like if Bill Gates moves into your

135:41neighborhood suddenly everyone's average annual salary is Mill hundreds of millions of dollars right so if you count all these infants who died in prehistory many of whom by the way died from infanticide like twins normally are not allowed to survive the the weaker one is left in the woods to die what yeah any sort of deform Mal formality they would just leave him in the Woods by themselves what a cruel way to handle it yeah woo that's dark man they would leave him to wolves that's up man leave your baby in a basket and run away yeah woo yeah there's a lot of a lot of infanticide but you know in our world a lot of it huh yeah was just because the times were harder then and it was more accepted that you were going to have to do some terrible things that you didn't want to do well it's just that you know if a kid's born physically up in some way you know you're not going to you're

136:37not going to have the resources and that kid's not going to that person's not going to grow up to contribute to the group and so generally and and also there's a different sense of life and death right you know I think where death is much more a daily presence it's not that big a deal so we're all going to die there I was reading about a tribe in the Amazon uh I can't remember the name of the tribe but when someone gets too old to keep up with the group someone is chosen randomly like they have a lottery or pick the shortest straw or whatever it is and their job is to come up behind this old person and hit him in the back of the head with a Hatchet oh boy right and no one wants to do it it really sucks but everyone agrees it has to be done and it's the least cruel option that they've come up with you got to be real careful the dude to keep signing up

137:32for that job exactly me me I got it dude I'm good with a hatchet my popy Joe you've killed nine old ladies this this is gone it's over okay we're just letting her suffer that's weird man that's a weird gig so anyway no human being has ever been old at the age of 40 look at this heartbreaking pictures of parents leaving their children in China's notorious baby hatches oh yeah what is that well that's that's probably girls the moment of Despair as parents cling to their children for one last time before abandoning them in China's so-called baby Hatches the father kisses his child her face hidden in a blanket the mother holds her hooded baby as their Shadows are cast upon the last door they will pass through together another collapses to the ground reaching out to touch her son for the last time what in the oh my God the baby this is she says in quotes my baby cannot

138:30take care of itself when it grows up one woman cries explaining that her infant has Down syndrome I just want my baby to survive she tells the information times news-based in I don't know how to say that Guang she had an accompanying female friend leave both in tears man on well this has been happening forever I mean we have safe baby drop offs here every hospital has a sign that it's a safe baby drop off take that off the screen sir and in uh Medieval Europe it was so common that they had these little boxes that um rotated and so you could leave your baby and just spin the box so you didn't have to look at it and no one would ever see you no one would see who was dropping it off it was Anonymous oh my God very common they're called foundling hospitals and over 90% of the babies left there died within a year boy in Germany they had what what are they called Angel makers uh this and

139:31this is through the beginning of the 20th century up to World War II it was a nanny that you hired with the understanding that your baby was going to die wow so it's like a babysitter who's going to kill your baby oh my God yeah so you would hire this nanny because your kid had Down syndrome or some sort of a disease or something like that or it was born like out of wedlock you know whatever God so the nanny would kill the baby oh my God they called them Angel makers the idea that infanticide was statistically significant that it's significant in the death of the population that that was so common well I mean today we have abortion and I don't want to get into you know heavy but like now if a baby's inconvenient or there's a disease that's detected or whatever you know cut it off at the past it off at the past in those days there wasn't so it was sort of post-natal abortion essentially I

140:22feel like abortion is one of those subjects where immediately upon breaching the subject there's a tension in the room I've just felt it I apologize for it yeah mean no it's you're right there's no way because the thing is both sides are right right that's the problem with you're 100% right yeah that's 100% the problem yeah and there are a lot of issues like that yeah it's one of those things where people scream at you and get crazy and they'll pick a side and it's death and it's this and it's that and it's it's a woman's choice to choose and it's you're both right you're both right like I got in an argument once with a comedian about it and he it was about Richard Dawkins was talking about a um it was on Twitter that an embryo human embryo is like it's almost no different than a pig embryo like he was making this like about at you know six weeks of life or whatever it would be a

141:14very very very early age yeah I guess not that wouldn't even be an embryo right what would it be it's still an embryo it's not EMB then right okay so an embryo is the earliest stages and he was comparing it to uh a pig and I was like well you know how crazy that is that's a ridiculous thing to say because it's not going to be a pig but if you leave it alone it's going to be a person so you know it's going to grow into be a person like it's like saying that it's no different than a pig is totally disingenuous right so I mean this comedian we arguing he started calling me a right winger he's like saying that I was that I was rightwing I'm like I am not rightwing but you are definitely killing a person that's about to be born I mean that's what you're doing you're cutting it off whether you cut it off at three cells or 3 months it's the same thing it really is I mean it it's not

141:56it's not it becomes it becomes much more like a baby it looks more like a baby it's more it's more intense of a procedure but once the process has started you've decided at VAR stage of the way that it becomes okay you know like late term abortions are frowned upon by almost everybody right when you get into the the last couple of weeks of a baby's life you can't really or uh before it gets birth nobody very few people are going to agree that you could just suck out the baby with a vacuum when it's 9 months old you know that's that's a little intense right almost everybody agrees that's a little intense so that means that we all have some sort of a reasonable cut off anybody who believes in abortion we have some sort of a reasonable cuto off will we accept it when it's a bundle of cells when it's a when it looks like a fish like when is it okay when's it okay and

142:42that's all I'm saying I'm not saying you should or shouldn't be able to do it and it's definitely not my choice I don't have a body that makes babies and do you think it starts at conception or is jerking off killing millions of sperm cells no because jerking off doesn't never make that connection there's not it's not a a viable so it is conception process that started I mean I don't necessarily think Life Starts a conception I mean I literally have I mean if someone can prove like if you had a turkey tester that pops up when you're pregnant like the moment B oh we got one and you could just push that sucker down and that egg would shoot out that fertilized egg would shoot your and then that would be a rap I got no problem with that right I don't have a problem with any of it I mean I do I think I think intellectually I don't I wouldn't say I have a problem

143:26with it because again I submit that I don't have a vagina I don't have ovaries I don't have a womb I'm not making babies I have an opinion and that's it there's no way I should be able to say yes or no when I see it as this weird sort of a a situation where we've figured out a way to terminate life inside the body where we can't see it yet it hasn't come out said hi hi Daddy it hasn't done that yet so we could hit the brakes okay I don't want to I don't want to do it woo we figured it out I I don't think that there's I don't necessarily think it's wrong or right but it is a thing yeah you know it's a thing and people require that you speak of this thing in the way they speak of this thing right and if you don't they are ready to Duke they're ready to Duke it out I'm with you I I because the the differentiation is the pro pro choice people are saying it's

144:18not a life and the other people are saying you're killing a living thing a person and I'm I'm in there where it's like no you are killing something MH but it's not a person not yet so I agree with both right you know but but fundamentally I agree with what you just said which is it's really none of my business it's not my body and no woman can tell me whether to get a vasectomy or not or prostate exam or whatever the it is they just passed the law in I don't know Arkansas somewhere that husbands need to be informed before a woman can have an abortion and a husband can stop it even if she's been raped that's medieval oo that's ownership of another person yeah a husband or a wife being able to tell the other one what they can or can't do with a medical procedure that's legal yeah that becomes like an owner that definitely becomes an ownership issue like if your wife told you you couldn't

145:09get a vasectomy I will not allow it be like what I will not allow you to eat meat either yeah I will not allow you to have ice cream you fat you know like all of a sudden like she decides what you're going to eat I will not allow you to keep that haircut CH talk that way all the time yeah they're crazy oh I would never let my husband blah blah blah like what Jesus your husband's a there is yeah well and your wife is you know under threat or in you know under ownership if she allows the same sort of a situation like a guy makes her do things yeah I've known uh people that their uh their husbands have made them get plastic surgery ah Jesus yeah yeah yeah talk him into it you know I want you to do this for me yeah get the big tits yeah get the lips I want those lips oh the lips oh man don't you do something about your nose I don't like your nose it's bogging me you could be

146:01prettier baby I'd show you off weird you fix your nose and then there are those people who like who like fatties you know the the like they feed the other person it's part of their eroticism to feed you as much as possible so you'll get as fat cuz I love you getting you know it's yeah that's not cool very strange people are weird man I you know I don't think hunter gatherers are kinky no this is the thing I think Kink is a response to a up environment so I think yeah it's this weird pressure it's conflict between the impulse and and what's allowed so it comes out in this weird distorted way I think that makes total sense so yeah Hunter gather is there's not as far as I know there's no evidence of Kink it's hard to get latex let's face it in the jungle although that's where it comes from originally have you ever met Wade Davis by the way no you should meet that guy he's

146:58fascinating I just had him on my podcast he's a ethnobotanist she live around here he lives in Vancouver um but he's an author I'm sure he comes to La regularly but uh he's the guy actually we were talking about 5 Meo DMT he was he and Andrew W isolated that for the first time whoa uh as white people anyway he studied at Harvard then he went to the Amazon for a long time he worked lived with a lot of tribes there very interested in hallucinogens he's written a bunch of books his first book was about Voodoo um something about the Horsemen of the Apocalypse or something like that huh he wrote a book called One River he's written seven or eight books he's a National Geographic Explorer in Residence he's this super badass dude damn I told one of his stories on your podcast a long time ago about this Eskimo dude old guy and the family said Grandpa you know we got to take away the

147:53keys to the snow machine cuz you you can't see so well and he's like you guys and that night he went out it was winter in the Arctic somewhere he took a and he fashioned a blade from his you remember himself out of the snow well he killed the dogs and he made a harness out of the one dog's skin and a little sled out of the dog's uh ribs and then he like tied in three or four other dogs and then he took took off across the tundra anyway that's a way day of his story he's like he so he made a knife out of his own heed his KN he he forms the blade and then he takes some he freezes and then he takes some spit and he rubs it along the edge and apparently that's what gives it the razor sharpness yeah and then he kill kills his dog with a knife that's right I remember that there's another Davis how I bought zombie poison in America inside The Eclectic Award of

148:50award-winning writer Wayde Davis former National Geographic Explorer and residence ethnobotanist and park ranger he's super cool guy Jesus Christ what a life that guy's lived yeah yeah he's uh again that's a guy like I want to meet these guys you know I yeah so he's cool he's up in Vancouver well listen man unfortunately I got a we this long all the time though man you're uh you're in the you're back in the States back I am I got nothing to sell I got nothing to promote doesn't matter man lazy Hipp lifestyle promote your podcast tangentially speaking it's a hilarious awesome podcast um and you do it fairly recently fairly often every every week okay cool that's awesome and let's do this more often dude you're around I'm here yeah yeah and uh it's that Chris Ryan now it used to be Chris Ryan PhD on Twitter but Duncan trussle ruined all that him and Brendan Walsh they stole my PhD those

149:45they they put pH next to their name and now PhD doesn't mean anything anymore so that Chris Ryan thanks brother it was awesome man yeah you too see you guys bye