Tom Papa

00:00person to do it on their thing like we're plug into it. We're live. We're just discussing uh very critical um sound engineering issues. We will take care of on the uh next version of this studio. I'm going to build something either in downtown or near here. We haven't decided. Really? Yeah. I always figured you'd had it here because you live here. Yeah, I do. But but I like downtown. I like the idea of being on the top of a big building. My other option and I've been looking at land. My other option is into Panga Canyon to build a an actual compound. My problem is I'm afraid because I know me. I don't necessarily trust me. I'm afraid I'll go wholehog Colonel Curts and start a real compound once I have the actual land and start putting things in and realize I'm not really that restricted financially from building I might just start getting crazy and then you could but all

00:52your followers could work for you. That's the problem. Then it becomes a problem. the unstable ones shows up with a suicide vest. Downtown's a bit of a pain in the ass, though. Getting there sucks. And I did a Someone had a show down there and I had to park like in this weird thing and cut through a Macy's to get to the where the thing was. Downtown could be a little tricky unless you got a cool Soho kind of loft space. That's what I'm thinking. What I was thinking of is getting a high-rise, like a top floor on a high-rise. ridiculous becantage point when the earthquake comes. Have you ever been in a high-rise during the quake? Well, I'm going to have a parachute for you and for Jamie and for all of us and we're just going to shoot through one of the windows. I'll have a shotgun. We'll blast through one of the windows and then we're just going to jump. I was in San Francisco.

01:52two summers ago, not last summer, the one before during that earthquake, they had a little up in uh Napa. It was the Napa one. And uh I had a show there that night. I'm in a high-rise. Get up to go to the bathroom at around 2:00 in the morning. On my way back, the whole building like a rubber band just back. I was like, "What the Oh, they're on rollers." Yeah. And that thing just scariest. I just laid on the bed and it was like, "All right, maybe this is going down. Maybe it's You laid on the bed." Laid on the bed. I just Yeah. I just kind of collapsed on the bed. Don't they say you're supposed to get in like in a door frame? There was There was nothing but just the deck. Yeah. Completely really weird. And I was like, and it was over. I'm like, do I just go to the airport? I should just get the hell out of town, right? Just start running towards the middle of

02:47the country. Yeah, right. Exactly. That's towards Nebraska. That was my instinct. And I looked out the window. I didn't see people like running in droves, so I just said, "Well, this will see how freaked out I am if I can just go back to sleep." And uh I did. I just fell asleep. Did you ever read the article? Was it in New York or I don't remember what magazine it was in. Um there was an article that was essentially saying the Pacific Northwest, like Seattle, is a ticking time bomb. It's just it's a matter of time before it gets hit by a massive tsunami and an earthquake. 100% going to happen. Might happen in 100 years, might happen in two. Who knows? Yeah, I'm going I'm going there this weekend. Are you? Where are you at? Parlor Live. Love that place. Good club. That combines my two favorite things in life. Pool, playing pool and a comedy club. It's

03:35almost like they designed it for me. It is pretty perfect. I haven't been there in a while. So what what happens like when they say like at that level that they say it'll hit, what happens to like does that mean like Seattle goes into the ocean? That was the article. It was the New Yorker, the really big one. This woman, by the way, received so much hate and I think threats and all kinds of crazy that she had to I think she had to make an amendment to this, the not so big to say, "Hey relax. I didn't mean to scare you. I'm just uh Yeah, but notice like Mexico seems fine. Look, goes all the way down to California, all the way to see the peel that they're showing in the illustration. Hm. I think Mexico is our move. Come on, Pon Papa. Let's do it. Let's go. San Diego might not be a bad spot either. It doesn't seem to be It's not falling off. That's not too quaky.

04:27No. And it's filled with military people. They'll know what to do. Yeah. Pendleton. Yeah, they're right there. They'll know what to do. That's a good spot to be if the hits the fan. Yeah. Bunch of who've prepared for this hitting the fan. Do you have a kit? A kit? Yeah. Do you have an emergency kit? I have food and dry freeze dry food and water. Save. Keep it in the garage fridge. Yeah. Well, I have uh garage freezers. I have freezers in the garage. Okay. And of giant coolers that'll keep I have these uh Yeti coolers. You ever see you know what a Yeti cooler is? No. Yeti coolers are really high-end uh hunting coolers, like outdoorsman coolers. They will keep ice. I use it when I brine things. Like if I brine a ham, like I smoke hams. You ever smoke a ham? Yeah. No. Oh, it's so delicious. Yeah, man. There's nothing like it. It takes a long time to do. Takes like six days to brine it. Six

05:16days. Six days. Wow. Yeah. Um but then once you smoke it and then cook it like right out of the smoker and then serve it, oh my god, it's amazing. Like my kids scream when they eat it. They're like, "This is amazing." Cuz it just melts in your mouth. It's just so tender and moist and delicious. Jeez. So, where's the cooler come in? What do you mean? You I leave it in the cooler for 6 days by itself in a bucket. So, I brine the ham, I take the ham, I put a bucket of water with salt, garlic, some brown sugar, and uh a few other spices. I forget what it is. Uh some Himalayan pink salt. And um then it sits in this cooler. I surround the cooler with ice or surround the bucket with ice, right? And I lock it down and I just leave it outside for days. Jeez. Six days later, I open it up and it's still got ice in it. Really? Yeah. See that? That's That's one that I cooked.

06:09Oh man, that looks good. Yeah. 5 hours at 250°. How many pounds is that? That was about I want to say like a three lb one somewhere. Jeez. Yeah, it was so good. Oh my god. Like you cut like you see all the juices at the bottom of that plate? Yes. It's like you cut into it and it's just squirting in your face. It's so good. So good. Jesus. Yeah. That is crazy. That's a wild wild ham, too. During the apocalypse, that's what you're going to live on. Well, my point is that those Yeti coolers can keep things cold for a really long time, right? So, like you could have like if you have frozen meat, it'll stay frozen in those things for a week, right? Or at least cold enough where you don't have to worry about it going bad. So, you can keep all your stuff in there. So, I have meat that'll last for a week. I have like a week of meat and then Okay. generator. I have a

07:01generator. You do? I'm going solar, though. I'm turning my whole house solar. I think I am as well. It's crazy to not in California. I know. It's You have to drop pretty good cash at the beginning. Yes. It'll take about 5 years to get it back. You might not ever get it back. Might not ever. You can have it set up where you're always going to have power and you're completely off the grid. Right. That's the big thing. which Brian Cowan has been trying to get them to turn over to his solar and he says they're really resistant. Like yeah, he paid for panels. He had the whole thing set up and he's like it's really interesting. He's like they make it super difficult for you to do this because they they're fighting the uh the solar companies. They don't want them to be autonomous. They don't want people to be autonomous. They also want you to be connected to the grid. If you if you

07:46choose to remove yourself from the grid and be just 100% solar, it's a huge issue. Very hard. Yep. very hard to get done. So, can has he cut off completely for He's not not yet. So, you pay like a couple cents a month just to stay on. I don't know. I don't know. You'd have to talk to Brian, but for for the longest time, I I don't know if he's gotten it turned over, but for the longest time, they weren't turning it over. Like, I'm talking about 6 months. So, he makes a sizable investment, spends tens of thousands of dollars, has all this equipment installed in his yard, and they wouldn't turn it on. He's like, "I couldn't get them to turn it on." I have a uh Tesla and I want to go solar so it's the car so completely but the battery like the charger you can get a rebate off of this thing the amount of paperwork you have to show the city of LA for them to give you $700 back is ins

08:37you have to take pictures of your house pictures of the charger receipts from the company uh certificates of work things from the panel I mean it's a list of 12 things. It's like, you know, and I if I have to go to the to the mailbox once with the right stamp, it's like it's going to take weeks for me to pull that off. You're a comic. I'm not I'm not doing it. I'm like, "All right, I guess we're not going to play ball." Yeah. Yeah. Like they make you do $700 worth of work to get your $700 worth of rebate. Exactly. You would think they would be the opposite. You think they'd be No. You think that they would encourage because it would ease the grid. Yeah. You know, I rented a Tesla for a day. Uh cuz we have a uh sponsor. It's called Skirt. S K U R T. And they're real new. But what they're doing is they're essentially like Uber for rental cars. So like say if you were

09:27outside the comedy store and you're like, I need a rental car. I want to drive to San Francisco. Right. They'll show up in 20 minutes with a rental car and you take that and drive it up the coast. Jeez. It's crazy. Yeah. You you you have an application or on your phone, right? You use the app, you order up a car, and you can get a Tesla. So, I said, "Okay, I want to try this service out before we do it. Let's get me a Tesla." Amazing. So, I got a Tesla. It was the service is excellent. Show up, they give you the thing, they give you the key, they do you know how to do it? I said, "Yeah, I watched a couple videos. I'm good." So, they go, "Okay." It's real strange because uh the Tesla doesn't start. No. And that's a weird up. Yeah. That's a weird one for people. You get in, you go, "Okay, why isn't it starting? There's no revving the gas." No, there's no gas. There's no rum rum. There's no

10:10rum rum at all. No. And it just sort of you put it in drive and Okay, we're going. Oh, okay. Yeah. But what got me was the how quick the battery drained. I was like, "Ooh, I don't like this." Yeah. How quick did it drain? Well, I live out here, which is about half hour to the improv. I drove all the way to the improv, back I drove here, home, uh, back to the improv and back home, and then back here. And it was more than a half a tank. More than half more than half gone. I'm like that's not 240 miles. Like that's But that's half. That's 120. But it's not even. It's not even. It's maybe 60 miles worth of driving. Maybe. Were you punching it? You must have been cuz it's a fast car. I don't think I drive any other way. That's what I do. There is a big difference when you're slamming it. Well, it's a huge There's like a thing. There's like a It shows you like the

11:03sweet spot and that's around probably around 65. It's around granny level. But man, when you blast that thing for Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. But it eats up the It eats up the juice. But it's weird how it accelerates without gears, which is very hard for people who've driven a regular car to comprehend. But it just it's instant on. So like a golf cart. Like a golf cart. Yeah. Super golf cart. It's fun even going from 0 to 3540. Yeah. Just to get that punch. It's a wonderful car. It's amazing. What they've done is amazing. I came here from down around Wilshire, like Beverly Hills area, get on the 405, hit autopilot, and I didn't steer until I got off of Shut the up. The 101. Shut the up. I didn't touch the brake. I didn't touch the accelerator. I didn't steer. Were you texting? I looked at a text. I looked at a text. That freaks me out, man. It drives better than I do. What is

12:09it doing is it's it's got a camera and it's scanning the environment. Cameras and sensors. So, it's on the on the dashboard. It'll show the two lines that it picked up visually. It'll pick up the um speed based on a sign and then it has cars, shadow cars around you. It's reading all the cars around you. Oh, Jesus. And it just it just goes. You set it at the at the speed like cruise control and it just breaks and if you want to change lanes, you just hit the directional and if it's thinks it's safe, it'll change lanes for you. Well, my uh I have a one of those Lexus SUVs and uh it'll accelerate and decelerate depending upon the traffic. So, it has a laser sensor and it gives you options like you could ride someone's ass and then it'll do it that way or you could spread it out where it's like four cars in front of you, it starts to break, right? which is the way I have it set it

13:03cuz I don't think it it doesn't break that good. It's a giant ass truck in traffic. It's pretty great. Like when I take my kids to school, I'll hop on the 101 Mhm. and I'll uh to not have to deal with the breaking stop and going. That part is just Yeah, it's awesome. It's really great. I mean, they say in uh car insurance companies are getting ready for the collapse of their business. Good. They say once everything's automated, they think, this is the insurance companies talking, that it's going to be an 85% decrease in accidents. Wow. That's how much better the car. And I know the car is a better driver than I am. Yeah. More cautious sees more. As long as you have the option to be autonomous on a country road, you know? As long as like you get on a country road, you can just zoom around and drive and see things. You mean do it on your own? Yeah. Yeah, because when

13:57you get on those roads, like I put it on autopilot going to the comedy store and I go from Shermanox Sherman Hooks over Laurel, you know, Laurel Canyons, wavy gravy and weird turns and people and it's it's a little nerve-wracking. So when you're doing that, so you're go doing all those turns, it's doing it completely by itself on Laurel to a point. Oh no, I don't like that. To a point. That's what I'm saying. That's the scary That's the scary part. cuz it doesn't really cuz you know Laurel it's old road you can't read the lines there's a lot of weirdness going on you you can't I've tried especially when you come back down towards Ventura and there's like that really whipping turn that you don't want to just let the car do it maybe it's going to be one of those things where they're going to be forced to have to redo the roads to deal with these electric cars that have to

14:45read the sensors maybe the other thing is I think the technology is going to be GPS driven also oh so that'll help if it syncs up that that way the government can just shut you down and pull you over. They could exterminate you if you do anything wrong. Well, you know, that's the that's the grand conspiracy theory about Michael Hastings. Do you know who Michael Hastings is? Michael Hastings is a journalist. He wrote an article for Rolling Stone about a general who was involved in the war and he was embedded. And while he was embedded over there, just coincidentally, it was when they had that big Icelandic volcano. Do you remember that Icelandic volcano? Yeah. Well, it globally crippled flights for a long time. I remember that. all through Europe. Yeah. So, he was stuck over there for I want to say like an extra month. And when he was stuck over there,

15:31they got a little too comfy with this guy and they started cracking a bunch of jokes about uh Vice President Biden. Who's that? Um the soldiers and the the general. And uh I don't remember Mallister. Was it Mallister? Which whichever general? I believe it was Mallister. He had to step down after the article came out because the article was just absolutely brutal. And uh it was devastating. And so this this Michael Hastings character started receiving like some serious tangible death threats that like you're a dead Like we're going to find you. Like you just you just cost American lives because you just got rid of one of the best generals ever because you don't think it's politically correct that this guy jokes around about a guy like Joe Biden who's obviously a goof. Like Joe Biden's a goof. He's a goof. And if you don't think he's a goof, why isn't he running for president? You

16:23know, why isn't he running? Ladies and gentlemen, for a bunch of reasons. One of them, Joe Biden was a plagiarist. Like Joe Biden, when I was in Boston at Stitches Comedy Club in 1988, which is back when he was running for president, but had to abandon his his campaign because they found his speeches were just in gigantic chunks of President Kennedy speeches. No. Yes. He stole from Kennedy. Kennedy. Nobody knew back before the internet. Nobody knew that you couldn't get away with like that. But he got away with it because of actual political scholars who are like, "Hey, I know that speech." So we at Stitches had Joe Biden night. We would do Joe Biden night. What do you mean? Where we would steal each other's Like if you went up, you would do my act and I would try to remember your act. We would try to remember each other's. It was really fun. That's got to be funny. Yeah. It

17:13was um Kevin Fitzgerald. Who the hell did I forget who I forget the comic who started it, but that's hilarious. That's a great idea. That's how much of a plagiarist he was. I never heard that. Yeah, he was. So, well, they keep the Democratic party keeps it under wraps now, but it was a big story in ' 88. So, what happened with this? So he started getting death threats because he was talking about So he started getting some serious death threats because this guy was a a loved general, very respected by these people who worked for him, including soldiers, including spec ops guys and all these people who looked at this Michael Hastings guy like you piece of Anyway, and Hastings just a guy, just a reporter. Just a reporter, but a snarky little right? You know, was doing Adderall and a bunch of other He was a little cocky. Uh anyway, um this guy drove 120 m an hour without hitting the brakes

18:05into a tree on sunset and died under very suspicious circumstances. Not only that, he was telling people that if he dies, like you should understand that they killed me. I'm not going to kill myself. If I die, just know this. They killed me. And when military experts who understand what's possible today when it comes to uh automating vehicles out there, they say it's absolutely possible. Absolutely. People are hacking into computer cars. Well, these cars like your car that can drive itself like this is a Mercedes and a Mercedes have that same ability. Yeah. Especially the new ones do. I don't know if his did, but what what they're essentially saying is they could just pin that accelerator down, lift off that g lift off that brake so the brake doesn't work at all and then disable disable the the bags and steer that right into a tree. Oh. And that's how they

19:01kill them. That's how people think, right? Of course, his family and a lot of other people who are close to them, they don't want to say anything. They're probably terrified and they say, "No, we we believe it was suicide." you know, and but but the people who knew knew him outside of his family like that is nonsense. It's it's a credible conspiracy because you're talking about a guy who through his article like the Rolling Stone article was devastating to the military. It's really devastating to was it McAllister to the point where a general has to step down. Stanley Mcrist Hastings and then on profiled the CIA director John Brennan at the time of his death. Yes. Okay. And yeah, he was working on a pro another expose of the CIA director. Jesus Christ. So it was really interesting. It was really interesting. And um you know I just have to be worried about someone

19:58being in the audience at the comedy store and being like he's a hack and they take out their cell phone and make me go into a tree on Laurel. Like the CIA is not going to care. But an angry audience member. Well, that's, you know, I mean, he he with what was the general's name? Stanley Mcrist. Mcrist. Mcrist and the CIA. Yes. Yeah. I mean, it was a double whammy of fuckups. And it's almost like they wanted to see what they could get away with. Like, let's see. We haven't used this Let's try to use this stateside. Oh, man. man, drive this into a tree because got to be able to because with someone writing a snarky article like that, I mean, I don't know what actually was said or I didn't read the article, but apparently it was very disturbing to the people that were involved there. And what he had decided to do with this article, right, from their point of view was take a very

20:47inflammatory position. They he tried to, you know, manipulate it and make it very negative. And you know they they can do things like that if they write you an article about if they write an article about you. Well, it's amazing. I mean, when you think about just technology and I'm so excited about this car. I'm so excited what it can do. It's amazing what where all this stuff is going. You just talking about that service will just bring a a rental car to you. I mean, it's all and it's moving so quickly and so great. But I tend to only think of all these positive, cool, fun things that you can do with it. you know, the evil guy, the evildoers can use that same stuff and and then some. I mean, in their mind, they might not even be the evildoers. He might be a real problem, right? You know, I mean, he might be in their eyes an enemy of America, right? I don't know who's

21:36right. Yeah, but if he really did interrupt some military operations that cost soldiers their lives because the general wasn't there anymore because he had to step down and it up the entire chain of leadership. It's heavy. And he was talking about in that same article that Jamie put up that he was around he was whenever he was around people who uh kill people for a living, they would invariably tell him, "We're going to kill you." Like it wasn't it wasn't a a couple people that were saying this to him. Like there was several people that saying, "Hey, you're dead. Just so you know, we're all we're all going to kill you." So this guy, what did he do? He doubled down. Went after the CIA afterwards. God balls on him. The balls on this young man. He tested positive when he died for crystal meth. He did. Yeah. He had um um verify that just to be sure. Um, he had had a an

22:29issue with drugs in the past apparently from all the stuff that I've read, right? And uh they thought he had kicked it, but you know, death threats will get you right back on the wagon or off the wagon. How does it work? On the wagon, off the off the wagon. Or do they plant that on him? Well, it's easy for him. It's his body. Um, it may or may not have been real. Who knows? And it also that stuff uh crystal meth and aderall are so closely related. They're They're almost the same thing. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Aderall is very very similar to crystal. Really? Yeah. Jeez. Well, it's just a a nice healthy dose, right? Where you don't have to worry about dying, right? Or running down sunset with no pants on or Right. You know, you you get productive instead of you'll just read a lot. Destructive. Productive and destructive are nextdoor neighbors when you're on aderall apparently. God,

23:24that was the scary thing when they were talking during the Republican debate about how how much heroin is in New Hampshire, how it's just Nobody not one person brought up prescription drugs. Yeah, of course. As the lead into that. Well, they can't. Not one. They can't. That's just too much money. Yeah. It's the pharmaceutical companies have them bought and sold. Yeah. It's a criminal It's a criminal business. The whole business is entirely criminal as far as politics. the business of politics, the way they get money and what they can and can't say. Otherwise, they would be talking about cigarettes, right? Cigarettes kill a half a million people in America alone every year still. Yeah. Still. Yeah. Does it's not changing, right? It like dropped off a little bit, you know, with education, but yeah, people are dumb, man. They they want those things in their mouth. It's

24:14amazing, isn't it? It's amazing. Did you ever get Do you ever try it? Smoking? Yeah. Yeah. Once as a kid, we were walking down the street and we saw a lit cigarette. Someone must just put it out of their car. I was just walking with my two buddies. I picked up a cigarette. And imagine if that's how you got herpes. That would be such a random cigarette. I coughed so much it was like that is awful. And it was like probably 11 and that was it. I was just like, no, I'm not going to smoke. It was it was just a lucky break. You know, I smoked with my sister when I was 15 and she was 14. I tried it and she tried it. She kept smoking till she was in her 40s, I think. Really? Yeah. I think 30s or late 30s, maybe. Um I I never smoked again. I just like this is ridiculous. It just seemed I like the idea of it. I like holding something. I like a lot of times when I'm out with friends, I'll have

25:08like a a roll up a napkin or something and just I just like the authority of it. Oh, it looks cool as It looks look it's the coolest. Just come out of a show and just light up by yourself in the in the hallway. You know it's funny when cigarette smokers look down on cigar smokers. Like off. I love cigars. Cigars are great, but it's funny when you know someone lights up a cigar around someone who smokes cigarettes. They'll go like disgusting. Like oh my god. Do you know what those cigarettes you smoke smell like? Yeah. They're the worst. The best is pipes. Pipes smell great. I know. pipes. Really? I know pipes smell good because that doesn't offend my family, which is all girls. Wow, that's interesting. Yeah, they're like, "Oh, that's not so bad, but a cigar, forget it. I could be in the backyard, shut all the windows by myself with a cigar and and there someone's going to

25:58pop their head out of a window. You're disgusting. Daddy's disgusting." Yeah, I love Nice cigar. Great. Me, too. H I got a cigar over here from Michael Dow. These are from They're probably dried out now. I got to get a humodor. Remind me again about a humor. I got a humidor at home. I got to bring it here. Yeah, I got one. This is from Did you ever see the the documentary The 75? No. Nick Depollo told me about it. Holy The 75. The 75 is about the 75 precinct in uh New York City and it was in the 70s uh the 80s rather during the crack epidemic. Oh yeah. Holy Oh, really? What a crazy documentary. And Michael Dow was one of the corrupt cops that was in it. And you know, he went to jail for a long time, the whole deal. But then got out and then they did this documentary and he did my podcast. Oh, really? And Yeah. And he brought in some cigars that he's having made. That's his business now.

26:52Well, he's doing a bunch of different things. He's just kind of hustling. It's hard. He's just got to I mean, he's in jail for a long time. Try to put his life back in order. Jeez. He just got caught up in all the money and Oh, well, he was 20some years old. He was young and all the cops are corrupt. He's like the the first day on the job they were explaining to him about uh a guy who quote unquote jumped off of a roof and it was because this guy had ratted on cops. He's like that's what happens when you rat on cops. And he was like, "Oh, got it. We're good. We're good received." Yeah. It was like one of the like the first week or something that he was working. But he was like it was really real clear real early on that there's a giant percentage of guys are on the take. Wow. And that's just how you made money. So, where does he get the tobacco? I don't know. I don't, you

27:38know, I think um they're made in the Dominican Republic. He's got a friend that he used to uh do quote unquote business with back during the cocaine days that he's pals with that and he goes and visits. I think that's where he's getting got a pal. Yeah. I got he's got a bunch of Cuban cigars, some Kohibas. Nice. It really is a difference. Yeah. Yeah. You get the real the real deal. You got to make sure you get real ones. So, there's a lot of counterfeit cubes. There's a lot of fakies. It's all going to open up now, though. Yep. Soon. But they don't have amount enough quantity like the I forget the name of the area where they grow. There's this area specific area VJO Trabaho or something like that. I forget where it's called, but it's a very small area where they grow the best cigars, but the soil is like incredibly rich and they've been tilling the soil and taking care of it

28:27in a very specific way for decades and decades. And they just know what they're doing. And now America's coming in and wants to devour it. Yeah. Yeah. Right. I mean, because I do sell them around the rest of the world. I used to get them from England. Oh, yeah. I used to get them sent to me from England. Allegedly. Allegedly, because it's not legal. No. Um, they would send them to me and then like a couple weeks later, they would send me the bands. So, they would send them to me with like Dominican bands. Uhhuh. And then you'd take them off and then they'd send you the the actual real, you know. Yeah. my friend uh you know Gad Elm that French comedian. No, it's like the biggest comedian in France and uh I told him that I had gotten uh a while ago that I had a Cuban cigar. He's like, "No, you don't." I was like, "Yeah, I got them. I did you get them?" I said, "My buddy got them from Vegas

29:18and he knows a guy. He knows a guy." He's like, "Tom, I'm telling you, Americans do not get the Cuban cigars. I will bring you some that we have in France." And then he brought some stuff from France and I couldn't really tell if it was different, but he his point was Cubid will deal with us. What you're getting is just rehashed horseshit. Maybe you definitely can get I mean Yeah, you can. I think the ones I have now are are legit. Maybe. I think so. The only way to really know is to get them from Cuba. Yeah. And even then, you don't know, right? And they could be shipping them from Dominican Republic to Cuba, boxing them up in Cuba with their own rappers and sending them right to you to save money. Yeah, you're right. I mean, once people realize that there's so much money in America now. Yeah. I still don't think you can just go hog wild and buy like 50 boxes of

30:07them, I think there's like a limitation on how much you're allowed to import. Yeah. I went to in Canada, I went to a uh to a warehouse, a guy that dealt with Cuba, and then he would sell them to the stores in Canada. So it was all through the government and and legit and stuff and that was pretty trippy. Yeah. Just walking through a warehouse of Yeah. All like humidity control. Yeah. Perfect. Yeah. It's interesting how they have to do that, right? They have to like keep the cigars at a certain level of humidity. But once they do that, they last forever. Yeah. And you can bring them back, too. Like if you get if this is dry and you have you just, you know, you'll bring them back apparently a couple times. Is that it? Yeah. After a while, they just turn to Oh, really? You got to be careful of mold, too. They can get mold. Where do you smoke your cigars? Where the I

30:52want? I'm a house. I'm a man top. I do whatever the I want. You're lying. No, outside. I got to go outside. I could do it in my office if I open up the window. Yeah. And I have to have some sophisticated methods of ventilation. Yeah. Yeah. What's that smell? They hate it. What's that smell? God, do they hate it. Oh my god. Or if you just come home and it's just still on your clothes. Uh, if I had sons, I'd be like, "Come on in here. Daddy's going to show you what to do." I know. I'm going to show you what to do. It's not It really repels every female for miles. Well, girls who don't get repelled by it, I do not trust. How about that? Those scandalous out there smoking cigars. The ones who smoke them. Yes. Yeah. Those girls are dangerous. Those girls will shoot you. She's got a gun in her It's true. You don't trust them at all. Oh, one of those. Oh, she's one of the

31:49guys. Yeah, I'm coming over for the Super Bowl. One of the guys, right? She loves sports, too. Come on. I don't even have any female friends. Whoa. When you meet a girl who doesn't have any female friends, yikes. Yeah, that's like a guy who doesn't have any guy friends. Yeah, ladies, if you have a a friend, he's a guy, and he doesn't have any guy friends, that guy's gay. That's the only explanation. That's right. It's the only explanation. Or he's a psycho. You're a psycho. Yeah. What kind of a man doesn't have any man friends, right? Only I I like hanging out with women. I just like being with the girls. Women are real. They're more real. Plus, they talk about I'm interested in. Like shoes. And I What they're really saying is I can fool them. Guys know I'm full of Yes. There's definitely that. Yeah. Yeah. Male feminists. Beadwear wearing namaste. You say that. Say that

32:36again. Say it again. I'm on your side. Yeah. I'm I'm different, ladies. You know, a lot of men are just rude. It's the guy in college with the acoustic guitar. The Animal House scene. Yeah, right. Exactly. That was one of the great scenes in unmasking. Like that's fake pseudosensitive artistic behavior, which by the way, ladies, is just for If we were all camping together, that guy would not break out that guitar. It wouldn't it wouldn't happen. Right. It happens cuz girls are around and you want to appear to be soothing and sensitive and it's the same as a male yoga teacher. Maybe. Yeah, maybe. I don't know, man. Bickrim guy with his little diaper on. Oh, that guy. The Bickram Bickroom guy having sex with everybody. Well, even better than that, he had a warehouse filled with like Ferraris and And they busted him and he said that this was for uh he was going to start an education program

33:35for children on automotive engineering. It was the Beerram Automotive Engineering Center. I'm not bullshitting. He just got caught with this. That's hilarious. And they just uh he had to he had to pay or he just got a judgment against him for millions of dollars for sexual harassment and with people. Yeah, he was banging all of them. Well, it's not just banging cuz if you're banging all of them, you they can't get money from you if you're banging them. You have to be rude. But he was You got to be rude about it. You know, if they like you and you're having sex, you know, they're like, "I want some money." Well, did you like having sex with them? Yeah, but I feel like I should be getting paid. Yeah. Yoga Mughal Bikram Mgul Bram Shney Shud Shodi must pay almost 6.5 million in punitive damages. There's a photo of him and the yoga place that I go to. He's sitting there like in the lotus

34:29position on a tiger body, like a a skinned tiger with the head. If you can find it. Yeah, there's a tiger rug. It's so It's like he's always in that diaper. But what what kind of mix signal are you sending, You murdering animals? You don't even eat tigers. You know, this isn't like, you know what I'm saying? It's not like, you know, you ate an elk and you have the horns there. No, you don't eat tigers. Like, what are you doing, man? Why do you have a skinned tiger? Are you a tiger? Like, there's the photo. Oh, god. By the way, it's not just one of them because that's that's a different one than the one that's in my yoga studio. Oh, that hair. Oh yeah, the hair is more offensive than the tiger. Well, he was going bald, so what he did is just grow it long on the outside. He did the Ben Franklin. I I'll admit I've thought of it. Here's the thing about those classes, man. There's something

35:17about yoga classes that are almost inherently sexual. Yes, there it is sensual. Wet. It's hot. Everyone's in their underwear. It's definitely that one. Yeah, that shot. Look at all those girls. Look at him. His little And then he brings them in and he's like, "You can be a teacher." And he wins. It's a cult. That's the danger of it. It's he really gets devout followers and then has sex with them on a tiger. Well, it seems like no matter what, if there's one person that's some sort of charismatic leader like that and then they're doing something spiritual like yoga, someone's going to run a cult. Yeah. Oh, absolutely. Powerful. Yeah. Not all of them. Like the I go to a good place. I go to this place in Agora and the lady who runs it is fantastic. like the group is f I mean it's a great place but it's a beak room place and I I was asking her I was like hey Rachel like uh

36:10this guy this beak guy is a little shady like what's the deal? Yeah they they say that he's a very good teacher but he's an That's that's how everybody looks at it. Like I I totally get it. I mean it's you're surrounded by all these beautiful women in these sweaty scenarios. Oh yeah, you know at a certain point Yeah. Yeah. And they're really Exactly. They're tired of her husband. He's boring. This guy's spiritual. I go to this great place. I go to this great place in uh Sherman Oaks called Black Dog Yoga. Oh, okay. And I heard of that place. It's really good. And I've fallen in love with a couple teachers there. No joke. And of course you have. There's a couple classes that are names. There's a couple classes they know. There's a couple classes that are like right after you drop your kids off at school, like a 9:00 start where it's it's not like the

37:026:00, 7 o'clock at night young hardbody going, you know, they're they're moms, they got a couple kids or they're even older. It's not like you're saying, "Okay, I'm going to do a photo shoot in here for whatever magazine, right?" You know what I mean? It's just, you know, regular regular looking people, right? You go to that class for a couple months and you start seeing the same people over and over again, everybody starts looking really attractive. It is a sensual practice. It is a There's a thing to it. Yeah. It's hot and wet and everyone's naked. Yeah. I keep my shirt on. Do you? How dare you? Yeah. You scared? I'm not scared. I feel like as a guy, it's 90% women. You should kind of just try and be invisible in a yoga class. Get the outside row. Keep your clothes on. This is really their thing and you're kind of visiting. It's their thing. Yeah. But the guy invented it. He

37:57didn't really invent it. No, he just he just took yoga and made it sweaty. Well, he just No, he just added he just put a bunch of poses in a sequence and he tried to copyright that sequence, but he was turned down. So there's people that he was suing. He's he's a very sue happy person. So like if someone say allegedly, I should say allegedly is a sue happy person. Right. So, if somebody I don't want to assume I get it. If you were one of his uh disciples, you started your own school and you had his own program and then you said, "You know what? This guy's kind of a douche. I don't want to pay him money anymore. I'm just going to go off and just call it Tom Papa's yoga, right? You would get sued." Really? Yeah. But even though he didn't invent any of those poses, so he gets a piece of every bick around the world. That's where he's making all that money. That's why he's got all that

38:42loot. And he was trying to say that the the sequences in order, the way that he's putting them together have some sort of a right extra powerful property to them and that that was his patent, right? But I believe we check on that because I believe that was turned down. Yeah, believe it was. He still made all that dough. Yes, he made a lot of money and probably still makes a lot of money. I bet the 6.5 is not going to make him flinch. Oh, I'm sure he's got that in cars just laying around. I don't I mean, you know, you go once in a while, it's 10 bucks a class. How How are you making that much bank? Well, if you have thousands of schools all over the country and each all over the world, really, and each one of them pays you, you know, whatever 500 bucks a month. Yeah. Cop. Yeah. Haha. You know, that's that's where it comes from. So, here goes. The court affirmed that

39:38although Berram had copyright protection in his published book on the sequence, he could not thereby invoke copyright to stop others from using the sequences described in his book. Ah yeah. See that's like that's like someone teaching jiujitsu and saying you can't teach those moves, right? Jiu-jitsu has been around for so long. You can never you could never do that. Yeah. This guy was born in the 60s. Yeah. You know what I mean? Exactly. Who are you to take over yoga? thousands of years old. The ball. The balls in this guy literally all tucked away in that little grape smuggler that he wears. There was a guy in my class that used to go there for a while who used to wear the grape smuggler and he was very sat nam. He was very very namaste. No, he had a man bun, too. Grape smugglers and a man bun that want to beat you up in the parking lot. Totally. Totally. And I

40:31think the other women look at you over there in your Nike workout stuff and they're like, "All right, he's he's fine." They think so. Yeah. They're like, "Thank you for not doing that." I hope so. I hope so. I don't know. The place I go to is very nice. Very nice uh people. Yeah. But again, it's not like the hot young hard I'm probably the best looking girl in the class. How rude. That was a joke. Couldn't help it. It's not true either. There's some cute ones. But the point being it's that's not what it is. It's uh you know, but there is a a sexual vibe there. I mean, you're just there to do yoga, but there is that kind of thing. And which is why I'm not too big a fan of the classes that team you up where they want you to partner up for this thing. Yeah. You ever have that? No. Oh, like you stretch you out. Yeah. They're like, "All right, get a partner. Get happy

41:17baby with your legs behind you now. Your partner push down on you and you're like, you know, you fart on this lady. That happens." That'd be actually the smart move. as a married man. That would be the smart man. How much porn takes place in a yoga stu yoga studio where the yoga teacher says, "Um, I would like to review some poses with you after class to give you some tips." That'd be like, if you were, let's let's just be as politically correct about this as possible. If you were single and the person actually was into you and this all went down according to this, this that would be the greatest like uh fantasy ever. Like you're in that hot yoga class all hot and sweaty and afterwards the teacher wants a Whoa. God damn. She's like, "Tom, I just really feel like your practice could aid with just a little private one-on-one instruction." Yes. And you'd be like,

42:08"Sure, sure. But first, we're going to start with a foot massage." Um, okay. Sign your back. Um, all right. Oh, okay. And she's rubbing your feet and lifting your legs. I'm just going to stretch your legs out. And she's rubbing the inside of your thighs and and you start moaning. She moans back and the next thing you know it's on top papa namaste. I had a uh massage at the uh Bakara resort in Santa Barbara. Oh And uh the lady got up on the table like straddled me on the table like at one point. Yeah. And it just you know I'm always thinking is it going to go someplace else? But it didn't. But when I came back to the room and told my wife what had happened, she was horrified. She angry. She was like, "That that does not happen ever. She was obviously doing something." I'm like, "She wasn't." Well, if you get time massage, they do it all the time. They jump up on top of

43:08you. Oh, yeah. They climb on you. This lady I go to, this me up. And I say She's a very nice lady. I shouldn't say She's probably in her at least late 50s, maybe early 60s, and she's from Thailand. Very nice lady. And she climbs on my back. She pulls my arms up and she's stomping on me. Like, she stomps the out of me. She she gets her knee in my back, grinds in it, elbows, feet. This wasn't that. Well, she's always she's always asked me, "You okay? This okay?" I'm like, "Just go crazy. I'm fine. You're not going to hurt me. just go get nutty. Do everything you feel like you need to do. You'll very tight very tight this egg. And then she just climbs on top of that table and just jacks me like a There's a lot of comedians in New York who get the massage lady to come over to their house to jack them. Jack, you're talking about Jim Norton. You don't have to say a lot of comedians. You could

44:05just say Jim Norton. Jim Norton and the outer electrons that spawn from Jimmy and the other guys would go, "You could do that." Right. Exactly. and the other ones who get the number from. Yeah, that doesn't seem smart to me. I talked to Jim about it and he's like, "Yeah, but I had them over my house. They, you know, they they uh I have a security building. They can't get inside." I go, "But they know where you live now." Like, what if they develop some bizarre fixation on you from the radio show and then meet you after, you know, John Lennin style outside your door? I don't think there's any part of that scenario that he doesn't like. Love it. Do it. Shoot me, Yeah. I think also, you know, you're you're dipping into the world of people who get paid for sex, and it's not necessarily a bad world. I don't think there's anything wrong with it. I don't think

44:51it's a necessary world for some people. Well, it's there's nothing wrong with jerking someone off. It's like, why is it okay to rub someone's back, but it's not okay to rub their dick? You tell me. Doesn't make any sense. It's it's foolishness, right? You know, the only I mean, I guess the possible threat of diseases, but as long as you know proper gun control, you know, to to aim that thing away from you, you know, always make sure you point at a safe distance and keep the safety on, you're fine. And stand at least an inch and a half away. Yeah. Don't put it near your eyes. You know, don't open your eyes up. I don't know if it's clogged in there, Mr. Norton. I've never been to one of those places where you know it's going to happen. I've never been in a place where it's it's never happened. You need to talk to Brian Redband. He'll hook you up. But you kind of hope and you never want to

45:36go to the point of like actually going there, but you go to like the straight place at like a nice resort and stuff and it's always in the back of your mind like maybe. But no. Yeah. I've never had a place do it, but I I have gone to a place where one of the guys that works there got busted because he was blowing all the dudes that would come in there. like they figured out that these gay guys, like flamboyantly gay guys, were coming to this one guy and they would be like super excited to see him, like a little too excited, right? And uh he had this little thing going on where he would have these guys show up and uh he would give them like, you know, a half decent massage, suck their dick, and then get out of there giddy and like get a big tip. But problem with those flamboyant gay guys is they're very uh vocal. They like to talk about right? Yeah, that was the best

46:25massage ever. I'm sure they had a nickname for him and for the place. Yeah. Well, they you know, I guess it just the word got out. But, you know, to think that I was getting a legitimate massage just a few doors over. Wasn't there a movie? How rude. Wasn't there a movie star that got in trouble for trying to uh John Travolta sexual advancing? Right. John Travolta did it a bunch of times. Travolta. Yeah. Yeah, he would he would get massages and he would like back up into their hands. Yes. Right. Back your ass up into their hands. What's going on over there? Oh. Oh, that's a good I'm so sore there. Very tense in that area. Oh, it's a open it up. Oh, get in there. Where's my keys? Look for my phone. It might be in there. Did you see him in OJ? I've met him. No, in the OJ show. No. Oh, the new show. New OJ on FX just started last week. Oh, come on. It's so good. Is it

47:22in the worst way? No. Like it's good. It's good. Like a good show. It's going to be It's a 10- part series. I think it's actually good. OJ versus the people versus OJ. Legit good. Oh, I thought you were saying it's good. Like it's and I should watch it cuz it's bad. No. And Travolta plays um Kardashian. No. Robert Shapiro. Robert Shapiro. Did they shave his head? Creepy. Cool. That's Shapiro. Yeah. Wasn't Shapiro a bald guy? He's kind of flamboyant. Oh, I'm think I'm confusing Robert Shapiro with uh Effle Bailey, but I don't think I'm telling you, Joe. This this thing is You think like you're you're tapped out on OJ. Like, why would I one episode and you're like, "Oh, man. This is going to be John Travolta has a wonderful wig." He does. I mean, that is just Get in close on that hairline, Jamie. That is impeccable. That is really nice. This poor bastard. I was at

48:16a store the other day and this poor bastard in front of me had one of the worst wigs I've ever seen in my life. I just say to him, "Yeah, full on wig." It was ridiculous. It was just ridiculous. 2016 wig. Oh my god. Have you seen Mickey Ror? No. Oh god. That's perfect. Look at that hairline. It's incredible. It's on again tonight. Okay. You'll like it. Okay. He plays You can definitely see him trying to put his rump in a massage therapist's hands. You can see it. Yeah. He seems fairly gay while he's doing this. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Oh, he's Yes. He's playing this very Arudite. Yeah. Good. Good. Really? Really good. Okay, dude. I'm I'm I'm on episode 8 of um Narcos. There's only 10. I finished episode 8 last night and I'm depressed that there's two left. Really? That good? Oh, it's so good. Wow. It's so good. Pablo Escobar was a Really? He built his own jail.

49:20He turned himself into his own jail. He built his own He made a deal with the government with the Colombian government where he would admit to and this is all historical facts, folks. Take him from Wikipedia. I actually knew about this in advance, but I just didn't know how they were going to play it out on the show, but they did a fantastic job in the show. But he turned himself I mean he was a major league drug dealer like the greatest drug dealer of all time next to El Chapo. El Chapo is apparently even a bigger deal than him really. But he made it so that he would only get charged with one count of smuggling drugs and even then he wanted to bargain that down to a lesser charge. He built his own super powerful luxury prison. had his own guards guard him in this super powerful luxury prison. Geez. Yeah. And that's that's where in Colombia. In Colombia. Yeah. So the

50:17government they had him Oh, well he killed everybody. And but they had him nailed and he's like they didn't even have him nailed. He turned himself in. He was just killing everybody. Really? Oh, he killed everybody. He blew up planes. Just killed everybody. Jeez. He just killed thousands of people. I mean, he had all these aario is apparently that's what they call a hitman in Spanish. He just had all these hitmen just killing cops, killing everybody, killing judges. He they they even had all this evidence about him dealing drugs. So, he hired this like um uh communist sort of revolutionary group to overtake the government building where his data was being held and blew it up. Lit it on fire. Oh my god. lit up all his evidence. I mean, he took over a government building, like a courthouse. It was insane. It's an insane story. Is he still alive? No, he's dead as He's dead. How'd they

51:11get him? Um, well, you're going to have to watch the show. Oh, I'm watching OJ. I believe it was a shootout if I remember correctly. For rival gang or the government? No, I think the government shot him. Wow. Who who shot him? Jeremy, Pablo was uh was carrying carrying so much or was earning so much each year they write off 10% of the money because the rats would eat it in storage or it' be damaged by water and lost. My god, that would be about 2.1 billion. So 2.1 billion per month per month was what the rats. No, it says year. It says each year. This picture right above it said it was two billion factored in a 2.1 billion loss in profits each month. Well, scroll that down. Loss. The loss was two. But it says it was it was earning so much each year he'd write off 10%. That would be 2.1 billion, right? 10% per year. Jeez. He was making 420 million a week. Look at his face, too. Look

52:11at him. Happy Happy dude. Yes. Happy dude. So much money. So much money. I always wonder what these guys eat for dinner. Whatever the they want. Babies. What's he saying? Chinese babies. Around 6:00 at night. Who is he talking to shows up? That picture did him in cuz that was one of the earliest pictures of him getting arrested. He got arrested and they were and he he was smiling at them like, "You dumb You think you're going to arrest me?" And then just wrecked havoc on the people that arrested him. He just did. It was amazing, man. Amazing. So, the show's great. He once started a fire with $2 million cuz his daughter was cold. Yeah, that's for real, man. Wow. It was gangster. What years was this? It looks like 80s. This is the cocaine years, man. What his uh is his son around? Scarface. Wow. His son who's 30 he's 38 years old since changed his name. Describe what

53:13life was like on the run with Sebastian Monosulka. It's Sebastian. That makes sense. Jesus. Oh, he's ducking. Yeah. it's it's it's unbelievable story and it's so well done. That show Narcos Netflix is killing it. They're so good right now. So good. There. So House of Cards that I mean Making a Murderer. Oh, I haven't seen that yet. That one's pretty good. I haven't seen that week of your life. People keep getting mad at me because I haven't seen it. You know that when around eight or nine, you're like, "All right, let's wrap this up." Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Like you're kind of like pushing through like one more set. Did you see Sunday night? Why did I agree to a late show on Sunday? Right. Exactly. At the funny face. Yeah. In the middle of nowhere. Did you uh see Soaked in Bleach? No. That is the documentary that was created with the help of the private

54:14investigator that Courtney Love hired who actually believes that she had Kurt Cobain killed. She hired the private investigator. She hired the private investigator to find him during the time that he was missing. Blah blah blah blah blah. But during his interactions with her, he believed her to be so deceptive and such a liar and such a manipulator. And then the evidence that he presents, he believes is enough to reopen the case. He said they did a terrible job of examining the body. They they they cremated him within six days. The police called it a suicide, not an autopsy specialist, which is just not the way you do it. And he said there's enough evidence to point to they he in his words thinks that Courtney Love had Kirk Cobain killed for the money cuz he was leaving her. Uh had him killed. Yeah. Or helped him helped him kill himself. Right. They said that the amount of

55:04cocaine or heroin rather that was in his body was three times a lethal dose. But of course that means for like me, a guy who's never done heroin, right? But like was it for him a guy who did heroin all the time? That other documentary with all the doodles moving around. Did you see that one? What's that one with all the doodles? Yeah. They took like all of his notebooks and animated montage of heck. Yeah. I haven't seen that one. There's a couple of scenes where they show him, you know, blitzed out on heroin and Oh, really? It's a bad drug. It's bad. So bad. I mean, just wasted with his kid, like his little kid is right there, like her birthday, something like that. Oh, that's sad. So sad. He's just, you know, in another planet. Bad bad drug. I used to know a guy who had a serious heroin problem, but he was like a world class pool player. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And he would get heroined

55:58out and then we play pool and he he wouldn't miss. He had no nerves. And he would be playing my friend George the Greek. Not like the famous George the Greek, the racist guy. Although this guy was probably racist, too, right? Jimmy the Greek. Jimmy the Greek, right? My friend George the Greek. He would talk like this, this And uh George the Greek would be so mad because he would gamble with this guy and the guy's name was Water Dog. They would call him either Buffalo Bill or Water Dog. Those are his two nicknames. Both cool names. This guy used to go to the bathroom. He would lock the door in the men's room at Executive Billiards in White Plains, New York. He would go in there, lock the the bathroom door, and then come out 10 years 10 years 10 years later to him, right? But 10 minutes later, he would come out just whacked whacked out his mind. He would sit in a

56:42bar stool like this. He would sit down and he would have his arms like on the rest, but his wrists would just hang there. like his hands would like gently rest on his gut and his hands would just sit there and he would just zone out for like another 20 minutes and then he would get up and be good. He would get up and he had like shark eyes. His eyes were like black like his pupils were totally dilated and he would get up and he would screw together his cute There's a photo of him. You can find it online. Buffalo Bill or water dog uh pool player. Um God, I forget his real name. Anyway, he screwed together his queue and he wouldn't miss really. And they were playing on this table with these really tiny tight pockets. It was a gamblers tables, table one at Executive Billyards, and they were playing for thousands of dollars. And you know, that's a a lot of pressure. This

57:34guy didn't didn't feel a thing. He was just dead on the inside. Just gone from How long did he last? He was good for hours. He's good for hours like that. Yeah. How many years? Oh, he was dead. He's dead now. Yeah. Yeah. He died a few years back. What were you doing shooting pool in White Plains? It's where I used to live. I used to live in White Plains New Relle. Oh, really? Yeah. I bought I got an apartment in New Relle because it was close to Executive Billyards in White Plains. Really? Yeah. That was the place I hung out. That's great. I was there so often. My manager thought that I had a problem. He's like, "Do you taking pool more seriously than your career?" I'm like, "God, I might be." It was just so much fun. The people that I hung out with were so fun. Really? Mount Vern and Tommy International S. I hung out with a guy who was an international

58:19credit card smuggler. He was the first really. His name was International S. And International S was uh he was a gambler, but I use that word loosely because he was an incredible loser, right? But he made so much money from all this credit card swindling that he would go into the pool hall. This is before my time, before I met him. I met him once he got out of jail, but he was still a loser. He just couldn't win, right? He psychologically he had like these blocks like he would have a ball like sitting in front of the hole for $1,000 and he just just bobble it. He could never win. He never won. Weird. He never won. It was just psychology. That's a weird thing, isn't it? It was crazy. So during the time where he was a swindler, what he would do is this was the early days of credit cards. This is like the 1980s, right? American Express, they would take these receipts that they

59:08would get them from stores. Like say if they run your credit card on something. Yeah. They get that the the carbons, they would get those carbons and then they would make copies of the credit card. They make another copy of the credit card and just run up these crazy bills, buy all this and then sell the And so he would get money and they would come to the pool hall with just brown paper bags filled with $100 bills. And people from all over the world would come to find him to play with him. Really? Yeah. Because he was a loser. Cuz he was a loser with tons and tons of cash. Wow. So he would just lose all of it in his bets. He And I say he's a loser. I don't mean like as a person. He was a very nice guy, but I mean like as a pool player, he was a loser. And he wasn't a bad player either. Like good enough to play, but Oh yeah. The big games player. He psychologically was a a beat a beaten

59:59man. He just could not do it. Did he drink? Um, nope. No, I don't believe he did. Uh, he died of cancer and it was an ugly one, too. My My friend's mom was a the one of the nurses that was taking care of him and it was just it it it ended bad. But, uh, they're all dead. All those people that I knew from back then. Yeah. The guy who owned it, Guy Azeriti, he was this hilarious piano player. who was a musician who wanted to invest his money and he bought a pool hall and uh it just became this incredible hangout cuz jeez this guy Guy Azeriti who owned it was the nicest guy on the planet and everybody loved him. So they would come and hang out at his pool hall like partially just to say hi and hang out with him and then he created this incredible environment. It was like all fun and laughs. And did you know other comics are there or just one? There was one this guy John Tobin who's

60:49a buddy of mine at the time. He was uh he worked there. He did like part-time gig there like uh the counterman, right, for a little bit. But no, it was mostly just pool players. Me and a bunch of pool players. That's pretty cool. Degenerates and weirdos. That's pretty cool that you had the balls to just go hang out there with all these crackpots. Well, I became addicted to pool and when I became addicted to pool, it was like that was my spot. I was there every night and I knew a lot of the people that uh worked there and ran it and Guy the owner was a good friend of mine. So, we would be there often times till the morning and then we'd get up, we'd go to the diner and this was I was 24 20 somewhere around then. So, I had no job. I mean, my job was to do jokes. So, I would do jokes at night. I would I would literally I would get up. I'd go to the gym. I'd head over to the pool

61:38hall. I'd hang out, see what what's going on, right? Uh then I would go do my gig and then I come back to the pool hall and I'd stay there till the morning. Where would you go gig? Wherever. You know, wherever it was either in the city or a lot of the gigs that I did when I first moved to New York, I used to do I did Dangerfields, I did the comic strip, I did all those. I did Catch. That's when Catch was still there. Catch a Rising Star was still there. But um I didn't like the fact that I only did 10 minutes and then it wasn't any money. So I was doing a lot of Connecticut gigs with this guy John Scheler, right? Do you ever do uh those Connecticut gigs? I don't I don't think so. John Scheler. He kept me paid. That name's familiar. Oh, he was great. Great guy. Yeah, he had a bunch of good gigs. They were like solid Connecticut like you know like hotel lounge gigs. They

62:22would have a bar and we had a nice little stage. But there was Jersey gigs. I did a lot of those for this guy Bob Gonzo. Gonzo. Yeah. You know him? Yeah, I think I did a couple like out in like Summit, New Jersey or something like that. Yeah, the shore. I did those with him and um I did um with Otto and George. We did a bunch of those out there. And then uh I did I did so I did Connecticut, Jersey, uh Long Island. Did a lot of Long Island gigs, the Brokerage, Governors, but those hole that is the thing that made you set up shop there. Yeah, that was rather than going to the city. I couldn't afford the city. I couldn't afford parking cuz I I knew that I needed a car. I had a car and I wasn't going to get rid of it. So, I was like, "Okay, I can't afford an apartment." Like, apartments for people who are out of the country don't or out of the city. New York City apartment

63:13rates are so insane that it doesn't make sense that anybody could afford to live there other than rich people. And it's gotten so much worse from back then. Way worse. Way worse. Back then it was you couldn't achieve it now. Forget it. Well, I was poor as I mean, back then when I first moved there, I lived with my grandfather in North 9th Street in New York, New Jersey, which was the ghetto. My grandfather bought it in the 1940s and when it was an all Italian neighborhood and then it became an all black neighborhood and then it became Puerto Rican, then it became Dominican and all the production left and Yeah. jobs dried up. Mhm. Also, they did block busting where the real estate people would uh come doortodoor and they would say, "Hey, black people are moving in. You know, you got to sell now, otherwise your your property value is going to go through the floor." And they they would

64:03literally clean out whole blocks like that and sell them and people would sell their houses in a panic. No. Yeah. Really? Yeah. They did to my grandfather and he's like, "I like black people. Get the out of here." Wow. He just We wouldn't move. He stayed there to the end. Yeah. It was It was crazy. Yeah. That was a common tactic that they used to use. Find a picture of that guy. I started to so dirty. A couple people and then I kind of started getting distracted. But was it Mike Seagull? No, no, no, no. Mike Seagull is a famous world champion. This guy's name was Buffalo Bill is what they used to call him pool player, gambler, um or water dog, but he was a So did you find weird guy? Did you know of the pool hall and then say let me try and find a place near here or did or the other way around? No, I was living in New Jersey with my grandfather. Trying to save up

64:49enough money to get an apartment, right? And when I saved up enough money to get an apartment, um, I was taking a trek down to White Plains all the time because of my friend John uh, and my friend Johnny B, who was, uh, Johnny B was actually a professional pool hustler. He was like one of my best friends, became one of my best friends around that same town. But it was a special place, man. Like I thought about almost writing a book about the adventures of being a part of that place cuz it was so fun. I was just going to say I think I've been in LA too long cuz I the whole time you're like this is a great movie or show. Well, it was it was like a movie cuz it was like every night there was something going on there and we would run to get to that place. I couldn't wait to get in there. You get in the door and no one had a phone back then cuz there was a there was a cell

65:32phone or a pay phone. The pay phone people would be on the phone all the time like getting calls. It would ring and people would call and so cool. No one had no one had cell phones, but people would come in from all over the country because that was a place that would had gambling action. So guys would come in from Canada, guys would come in from California. A guy came in from you. They come come in from all over the place. And you're playing but not at that level. No, no, I wasn't good. You're just playing like, you know, like I was more of a spectator. I was playing and I was playing in tournaments and stuff like that. And I got I got better over the couple of years that I lived there, but I was never at a level that these guys were at. These were like real professional level players would go there. And is it like any sport like those guys just had something special or

66:12they just put more time in time? Yeah. I think I think there's special there's certain special things like athleticism like like Carl Malone or like you know Michael Jordan or you know fill in the blanks with like some of the elite athletes you know LeBron. Yeah. LeBron James. And you you're you're a regular guy at yoga. Yeah. you're a regular guy, he's not, you know, there's a giant advantage. There's a giant advantage. So there he has that thing. And then on top of that, I think when you get a guy like LeBron James, what you get is a guy who has this massive physical advantage and then dedication and then intelligence and then discipline and all and then you get a great one, right? You know, it's once in a lifetime athlete that comes along that has the whole package. But with pool, it's not like that because there's no physical strength aspect of it. Long

67:02arms? No. Doesn't doesn't help at all. Some of the best players in the world are really tiny guys. Are they really? Jose Para using the bridge. Yeah. Well, or they switch hands. They switch they play left-handed, right? Like Jose Para is like one of the greatest players of all time. He's like 51. Oh, really? Tiny little Filipino guy. Yeah. So, it's just more just dedication and time and playing understanding of geometry, um, angles, understanding like how the ball is going to reflect off other balls, how it's going to bounce off the rail, things along those lines. So, you got good though. I got pretty good. Yeah. I never got real good. I got I got good compared to regular people. Like regular people see me play. They're like, "Holy he can play." But like a pool player would never be impressed. No. No. I'm okay. You know what's that game with like I don't think there are pockets.

67:46Three cushion billiards. Is that what it is? Three different balls and they Yeah. You hit one ball and it has to go three cushions and then hit the other ball. Right. Yeah. That's a weird game. Yeah. That's a game that's really popular in South America. really popular in Korea. In Korea Town, you can go to Korea Town, they have three cushion billiards places. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. I was at where was I? St. Lucia or some place like that and they had a table there and no one knew what they were doing. That's what it is. Yeah. There's uh uh we used to have one um that uh they set up at executive and uh people from like all these other count like a lot of Mexican players would come in guys who worked in the area who were um you know Latino or from some Latin American countries they would come they'd be so happy to find a table like that. Really? Isn't it weird

68:32how some games just can last centuries? Yeah. Like chess. Mhm. Pool. Yeah. Botchi. You know what I mean? that there's something to they just got it right. Yeah. That it could last that long. Chess is an amazing one. An amazing one in that regard because there's never been a game that's really come along that's become the uh any sort of a contender for the intellectual game, right? That is the intellectual game. Yeah. Yeah. Battleship made a run at it. No, it didn't. You sank my battleship. B9. No, chess is sick. It's also one game. It's one of the few games where you could tell people you play and they don't look at you like you're wasting your time. I You're right. That's exactly right. You're like, "Oh, okay." Like even pool. Like I tell people I love to lay pool like what are you doing? Right. Exactly. Get home to your family. Right. Yeah. You tell you tell

69:26people you're involved in a chess tournament, you're like, "Wow, he's a dedicated intellectual." Like Tom Papa. Tom Papa thinks. It really is true. Yeah. I wish I knew more people who played chess. I wish my I tried to get my daughters into it, but uh it's a cool thing to be able to do. Just it's so engrossing. It's very good for your mind. Yeah. Um there was a guy I was on a movie once and the guy was uh renting his house out for you know have you ever seen how they do that? Like people rent their house out for movies. I used to know a guy that's how he paid his whole mortgage. She had a cool house in the Hollywood Hills and he would just rent it out to movie studios and TV studios and that's how he paid his bills and they would only use it like a couple days a month and that paid it for everything. But anyway, this guy uh was a uh a chess player and all he did was

70:14play chess really. And so we're hanging around with this guy in his house and uh and I'm like, "So this you just played chess?" He was like, "Yeah, I play chess and I I you know, I'm divorced so I don't don't need the whole house. I rent the house out for movies and it's kind of fun. I like watching movies get filmed in my house." I'm like, "Wow, that's great." Because he had a kind of a cool house. And so, um, I went with him. I said, "Show me what you do." He goes, "Okay, well, I'm about to, uh, I'll get a game right now." So, I'll go to this forum and I'll say, "Who would like to, you know, have a game?" And then they meet up in this room and then they play chess online. Online? Yeah. And I was watching them play chess online. And that's apparently where the majority of games get played, right? Norton and I were starting to do that. You could play against each other

70:54online. Oh, really? Yeah. And uh it's cool, but there's I just the physical part. It's like anything with online newspapers, whatever. I miss the physical moving the pieces. Yeah. Yeah. But Jimmy was into it for for a bit. Howard Stern was into it to the point where he was taking lessons and talking about it on the air all the time. Oh, really? Yeah. I think he probably decided it was just a m I mean, he's It's a time suck. Yeah, it's a time suck. Once I started being able to read in the paper the moves and understand it, I was like, I'm spending too much time. I would say that's when I'm balling. Look at me. I'm so smart. Oh, king to rook six. Of course, the obvious move in the Belgian variation. Why is it in the paper? Because it's for smart people. How dare you? They show It's like It's like reading the uh box score to a baseball game. Well, it's always been in the paper. Is it a

71:47particular game that someone's playing that you're following along? Yeah. No, they're they're showing, you know, these two guys just played last night. Yeah. In this big tournament or whatever. Well, maybe has there ever been a newspaper that'll show a move then ask you for the counter to that move and then you like you play the game out day after day? Um, no. No. They wanted to do it, but then uh the Seduko people blocked it. The word fine people were outraged. What was the the the uh conspiracy that we were talking about before the podcast started that we both thought was that you you brought up? The the Oh, yeah. The Chipotle. Oh, the Chipotle thing. Yeah. Oh, yeah. What's the Chipotle conspiracy? I was eating Chipotle. I was I'm on this wacky diet, man. I can't eat any grains. I'm on this it's called the primal blueprint diet. And the idea behind it is no grains, no

72:43carb, like very low carbohydrates, no sugar, you know, no processed sugar. You could have like a piece of fruit every now and then, but you you want to bring your body into ketosis where your body burns off fat and everybody's telling, "Don't do it." Everybody's telling me not to do it. That doesn't work for this. I'm like, "Have you done it?" No, but shut the up. Shut the up. Where did you hear about it? Uh, we had this guy on. His name is Mark Sison. He's a um pretty famous guy in the paleo community and he the the you know you term paleolithic diet. Yeah. Well, that's actually kind of Yeah. I just read that. Well, what's is paleolithic people didn't really eat like that. They they ate grains. So, what he's saying is like the name is wrong, right? But the diet, the principles of the diet are really good for fighting inflammation for a lot of people like he had irritable bowel

73:32syndrome. A lot of people, they find that it helps them with arthritis and a lot of it if it it cures a lot of inflammatory issues. Not that I have them, but I'm like, "Okay, well, let's see what it's like." And then I had this guy Kyle Kingsbury on who's a former UFC fighter, great athlete, great guy, very, very smart. And he was talking to me about it, and one of the things that he said was he was citing the mental clarity aspects of it. He said it makes his mind functions better, he has more energy, he feels more even throughout the day. And then I talked to my my brother Danny Propakos. You know Danny? Danny Propakos who's a world champion jiu-jitsu player who's a good friend of mine. He found out that I was doing it and he said he's been on it since November. And he also cited the mental clarity thing. Really? Yeah. And Denny's a real like physical culture wizard.

74:17He's always on top of like the latest and greatest of of all the techniques and you know modalities as far as training and stuff like that. So just no grains is the dominant thing. No grains. Mostly fats. like fats. Like I eat a lot of avocados. I eat I might eat five avocados a day. Really? Yeah. I love avocados. I had two of these steak bowls from Chipotle today with uh just beans, no no rice, just extra heaps of guacamole. And then I ate two giant things of guacamole on top of that. So I'm just eating guacamole. How d would have meat in it? Yeah, you didn't mention the steak. I did. I said steak bowl. You said steak bowl, but then you listed Well, it's a steak bowl, but there's no steak in it. But you also took the rice out. Yeah, I just No, just no rice. Avocado and beans. That's it. I'm just eating boring When I go to a Well, the meat is great, but when I

75:13go to a restaurant, good lord, it's hard to find things to eat. Restaurants kill every diet. No matter what No matter what you're trying to do, restaurants are just a bad place to be. Well, I went to this one place and I wanted to get a nice salad and then I said, "Wait a minute. What's in the salad dressing? Do you do you toss it in the salad? They go, "Yeah, it comes already tossed." And you might as well be eating candy, right? I ate the salad. I'm like, "This is crazy. I can't even eat this." I go, "This is all sugar." And they're like, "Well, there is some sugar in." I go, "What's some This is a dessert. Your salad's a goddamn dessert." That's right. It was like glistening with like syrup. Like, I'm not kidding either. I know. I know. That stuff's high calorie. You ever, you know, wood ranch? You ever eat a wood ranch barbecue place? They have this thing called a Natalie salad. It's

75:56delicious. I love it. But you might as well be eating a ice cream sundae, right? It's just It's a a salad that's covered in syrup. Jesus. Their salad dressing is syrup. So, how long you been doing this diet? Today is what is it, Jamie? Day nine. Nine, I think. Nine days. I feel great. I feel great. Any different? No, I've lost a little weight, which uh you know, my my body is always pretty much the same weight. I don't really gain or lose, but I I've did some things in the past that made me lose weight. One of them was I cut all the sugar out of my diet and I lost five pounds in a week, like doing nothing else but doing that. I was like, "Well, this is crazy." And then I went gluten-free for a while and that that helped me a lot. That made me feel like there was something going on to that. Like my energy levels felt good, my skin looked good, like I looked

76:44healthy. I think what that is though is a sugar thing because I think with gluten, gluten is bread and pasta and wheat and that stuff. It's not like I had an issue with gluten itself. Like I didn't have an issue processing gluten, but that it's all converts to sugar, right? Like that's just a lot of sugar for your body and your body just doesn't want that much sugar to process, right? It's essentially toxic. And the more people are learning about sugar, the more people are coming to an agreement like almost all these scientists and nutritional experts are coming to an agreement like processed sugar is just awful for you. Yeah. It's brutal. It's really bad and it's in everything. Everything. Everything. I've been baking bread lately. Holy Sourdough bread. Sourdough bread is very good for you. It is. Has gluten though. Yeah. Natural process. Yeah. But

77:35sourdough bread apparently has way less gluten than regular bread. Right. Yeah. Cuz my wife can eat that but can't eat the other bread. Really? It's a cool thing. It just takes the ye just take flour and water. You need a starter, which is culture. Yeah. just start with uh flour and water and then the natural yeast that comes from around us in the environment goes in and starts eating that what and it becomes a living thing and people have starters that are like a hundred years old. What you take a you take a couple ounces off and you always maintain a little and feed it like a living thing. It's like a bowl of flour and water but it you'll see it start to bubble when you feed it more flour and waterow the yeast is eating it. Yeah. It's the coolest. That's crazy. So, it's in your refrigerator like So, it's in my fridge like a little little uh mason

78:24jar. Wow. And then you scoop it out. You take a little chunk of it and you feed it and it expands and then you take some of that and make bread out of it. That is nuts. It's pretty. Yeah. I never would have been into this if I didn't hear that concept. And now I can't stop. I'm baking bread like Little Red Riding Hood. Who gave you the idea to do this? this writer, friend of mine, he's been doing it for a long time and he said it's just you just have sourdough bread and the kids love it and wow I just started doing it and uh I just got hooked on it. Where do you buy your starter? You don't buy it. You can just start it. You make a starter. Make a starter. Okay. How do you do that? You just take some flour and water and put it out on the on the uh counter. That's it. Yeah. I mean, there's measurements and stuff, but that's it. And then the natural yeast.

79:16There's yeast around us just floating around. That explains a lot of things. Yeah. And it goes into it goes into the uh into the concoction and you'll see it starts to bubble and get lighter and you feed it some more and it gets bigger. Why you say feed it like feed it? Feed it cuz it's feeding it. It's like a yeast like a little like a little community. You're feeding it. You equal parts uh flour and water. Wow. And it eats it and now it's like this living thing in the house. Who has a starter that's 100 years old? I went to buy a Dutch oven, which is like a pot that you can bake that you put the bread in. And this old guy was like, "What are you doing?" You know, the guy at Williamson always like six foot lanky. What do you need it for? I'm like, I'm going to make some bread. Oh, I've been making bread for a long time. Really? I'm going to be making sourdough bread. Oh, I got my

80:13starter. Where are you getting your starter? I said, well, a friend of mine has the Brea starter and my daughter just Wait, whoa. The what? Labraa. What's the Labraa starter? That one is that all the Brea Laba bakery bread, you get the yeast off of the skin of grapes. So, it's a process where you take grapes and you put it in like cheesecloth and you just let the the yeast come off of all all grapes have yeast in the skin eating on the skin of the grapes and that drips off and then you put it into the basic starter with flour and water. So, you say it's a little sweeter. It's a chain. Is that what it is? Yeah, like Yeah, there's you'll see them. Okay. Their actual bakery and now they're like in Ralphs and everything. It's all over and they say and like the places San Francisco that have big sourdough that it all it's maintains the same starter that they've always had. So

81:04this guy said uh so I told him where I was getting mine and stuff. My daughter made one as a gift and then this other guy gave me a piece. He said his starter came from Jackson Hole, Wyoming and he got it from a friend of his and it's over a hundred years old. What? People have been passing it on. It's a cowboy starter. Cowboy starter. That's what it was. It was a lot of miners in uh San Francisco and all that during the gold rush. They were creating bread that way. That's where it started. Now, huh. Yeah. I wonder how old the yeast organisms get before they die. And do they die? They probably reproduce. And yeah, it's a good question. I don't know because basically like I have it on my counter now. I've been feeding it for the last day. So now So now it's kind of bubbly. Wow. It's like glue and it's kind of bubbly. So I'll scoop out 4 ounces of that, make bread out of it,

82:02and then take 1 oz of that, put it back in the jar, feed it a little, and put it in the fridge. So what's the process? So if you took 4 ounces out and made bread with it, what do you do with that? the starter. Uh you basically take a lot of flour. You take like 28, this is to make two of them, two loaves. You take uh uh 28 ounces of allpurpose flour or wheat flour, whatever you want to use. You put that in with a little salt. Then you take your starter, you take the 4 ounces and 18 ounces of water, a bunch of water, and you make it into a cloudy mixture. And then you dump that into the flour and salt that's in your mixer. and it just makes it into dough. And then it just rises naturally. Fold it a couple times, put it into a ball into the Dutch oven after a couple hours, and then you've got bread. It's that simple. It's that simple. How long before you start

82:56growing your own wheat and smashing up with a rock? Probably. I'm I'm headed that way. That is what the guy who told who I bought the Dutch oven from is like, I really like seed breads. Oh, these guys. Really? And then I looked it up. That's like crazy. Like 12 different seeds from different places and you mash them up. I mean, then then you're getting a job at William Sonoma. I went to the Museum of Natural History and they had an Egyptian uh mummy display. Really cool. Yeah. Um, but one of the interesting things was by the time Egyptian people were older, you know, they didn't leave live that long, but if they did, they didn't have any teeth left. Because the way they made bread, they ground it up. They ground up their own flour and it left sand in the bread. Oh, yeah. Gross. So, their bread was all You were eating sand, so it would wear away your

83:52teeth. That's gross. I thought you were going to say sugar. No, sand. Oh, it's so much you would wear your teeth down nerves. And they had all these methods that they were trying to concoct to save teeth. Like the wooden caps that they would put on you chew on that instead of chewing with whatever nerve endings were left in your face just so you could eat more sand bread. Sandy bread. It's up. Oh, it is a kind of a trippy thing that you just put some flour in water and this yeast comes from the environment and now you've got this amazing tasting bread that the family can't stop eating. The kids are cutting it. It's just this has been around forever. Right out of the oven when it's hot. We're eating bread like crazy. Like when you're talking about like eating sugar and all that flour, we just can't stop. Wow. We're all going to be fat. I'm going the other way. Hey, I'm not eating

84:49any of it. At least for 60 days. I'm going to 60 days. Feel I don't feel mentally that clear. Have you making some life choices that you regret? I told you I woke up at 7:00 this morning like, "Oh, I got to do a show tonight." Blame That's the bread. It is the bread. It is, man. The bread. It's making me breaking you down. That's so weird, man. Yeah. So weird that you could just like put it out there and the natural yeast grows. I had no idea. No idea. I felt like it I you know what I wish someone had asked me where does yeast come from cuz I never considered it before. I would have been like uh what is it a plant? What is I don't I don't know. And there's like you know cuz you can buy yeast that just make regular bread and you throw it in there and it eats Wow. Woman maintains 122year-old sourdough starter. Yeah. Look at that. Whoa. There was a woman

85:42online who is this radical feminist who made sourdough bread out of her yeast. Yeah, go find that one. Jamie, kids couldn't keep their hands off it. Oh, it was flying off the shelves. Yeah, I I tweeted about it, but it was quite a while ago. Probably never find it, but I was like, good for her. There is I can't tell you. It's really a weird thing. I mean, who I would never be baking bread and now I'm like hooked on it. Yeah, there it is. Woman who made sourdough bread using yeast from her vagina just ate the bread. Yeah, but it's her own though. Why wouldn't she? You know, I would eat a donut. It was my own donut. Gross. Why is it so gross when I eat it? But when my wife swallows it, it's all gravy. It's a good relationship. It's healthy. It's a commitment. That's how life is built. Yeah, it's a compromise. Yeah. So, I'm baking bread and getting fat. What else you doing? You growing

86:46anything in your garden? You one of those guys? No. No. No. We're surrounded by bamboo. I had a like a bow and arrow. Bamboo just cost me five grand. What? Why? Well, once we had the rains, nothing was draining off the property properly. So, uh, they started looking at the, uh, drainage pipes and stuff, and the guys who built it didn't fasten them together at one point and bamboo has grown into it's like a log. I mean, I never saw it this thick, like in massive. I had a root growing in my pipe. See if you can find that cuz that was online. Like a toilet root. It looked like a It looked like the guy was pulling a gopher out of my toilet. There was actually, this is what happened when we moved to Colorado for a bit. Um, I didn't use that bathroom obviously cuz we were there for like four months, right? And so the the thing had apparently been in the toilet. There

87:44it is. That's from my own bathroom. That's the bathroom in my office. Oh my god. That thing, this guy's holding it up right now. Um, send me Was that solid or was that fibrous? What is that? Flicker. send send me that photo so I can uh put it up on Instagram. But cuz I I always forget about this. I need to put it up somewhere, show people. But that thing, it looked like if you see how thick it is, it looks like he's pulling a muskrat out. It looks like a some kind of a weasel or something. How long was it? huge. It's like 4t long at least. You start to get scared of it. You're like, "This stuff is really invasive." Like it could really do some damage. Oh yeah. It's not good. Look at this beautiful bread. Wow. That's your bread. It's pretty good. That's amazing. That looks excellent. It's good. Makes me want to break my diet. That was like one of my first ones. And this is the starter.

88:35Have you gotten better at it? Yeah. Unfortunately, I got to get back on the road of home bacon bread. This is a lot of starter. Oh, okay. Just sit. That's before I knew what I was doing. I was growing a lot of it. Now you just need like a little bit. And was this just like Do you have a burning desire to do this? Like No. My friend told me about it, that he was doing it, and I came home and at dinner told my wife and kids about it. And then for Christmas, my daughter started a starter. She went off and YouTubed and figured out how to do it. And then for her present, she gave me some starter. Oh, that's so cute. So sweet. So, we started making bread off of it. And then my other friend who turned me on to it originally, he brought me a little of the Brea starter. So, now we have two creatures. Yeah. Have you thought about experimenting with different starters? Like the grape

89:25starter, the starter? It's like the one's intriguing. I have to admit I didn't know about it until just now. That's what this show's good for. No, it uh it No, maybe grow my own weed. That would be good. Now it's pretty safe. Pretty safe to grow your own. Can't really get in trouble for that. Not in California. If you're in Texas, you can go to jail forever. You can. It's so stupid. Forever. They can lock you if you they found you with a giant plant. Not only that, like say if you have a plant and the plant's in dirt and the dirt's in a pot, they weigh the whole thing together. So if you have a big heavy clay pot Yeah. the and the dirt that it goes in, you you might have 50 lbs of weed. Meanwhile, you really don't even have a pound of weed. Oh my god. It's probably a male plant. I grew it in college. We had a house and we had like a walk-in closet. Oh, really? It's the happy days. Yeah.

90:19Just seeing it come alive and just knowing and you know in school you had no money to even buy it. Then all of a sudden we were growing it. It was great. That is nice. Not to sell, just for ourselves. Good. Beautiful. Oh, it was beautiful. It is beautiful. That would be a nice thing to grow. That's a good idea until your kids find it. Yeah. Then you got to explain. I know. Daddy's a pad. You know how daddy's funny and silly? That's not natural. Daddy's enhanced. It was natural for a while, but now he's got to keep it going with this. I knew a guy who had a um a dispensary and in the back room of the dispensary it was a very large room where they were growing weed and I went into the the room and it was like weed that was like 5t high 5 foot high plants and all these lights and everything and I swear to God it felt like you were going into a room filled with people like there was like

91:07an intelligence in that room. It was very strange. Granted I was hired. You must have been really hot when I walked in there. But I do I I really think there's something to it. There was something to that room. I was like, "Wow, this room feels like there's things in here." Like it doesn't seem like a room full of plants. Yeah. Like you can go into a room full of plants, you're like, "Oh, this is beautiful vegetation." Yeah. But this is like, you know, room full of Hello, you was very weird. That is I totally get that. You really start to care for them, too. It's like it really seems insane that you don't own a dispensary. It's like me, anybody with a with a brain living in California. It's like you see, you know, Denver print money. It changed that city and people are making so much money. We're talking about going into Denver. Oh, yeah. Yeah. We we've considered

91:58starting something in Denver. Perhaps some sort of an edible factory. Really? You got to hire mercenaries. Problem. What do I got? You got to hire mercenaries. And I'm not joking. If you want to do that, it's not because it's all cash. It's all cash. Um you're dealing with a lot of uh people that know that this is like essentially like a bank they can rob, but it has much less security. And for the longest time, people were being forced to take these cash drops and take them to banks, right? And banks weren't even taking them. So then they would have to take them to banks and convert them to like a traveler's check or something along those lines. It's like there's a bunch of different workarounds that they had to do. Banks are taking it now though, right? I don't know what the they're doing now. I don't think it's there's a the real issue is if some wacka dude like Ted Cruz

92:50actually becomes the president, which which is not outside of the realm of possibility, folks. This is one of the scariest elections in recent memory for me. I think is the most scary because I don't think that people are willing to vote for Hillary Clinton. I not only do I not think that people are willing to vote for her, I think that uh I don't even think I think the people that willing to vote for her are only willing to vote for her because she's a woman. They go, let's let's see if chicks can do it, you know? Or I want a woman in office. Yay. Like it's that kind of thing. But she's not compelling as a leader. She's just not, you know. No, Bernie Sanders is interesting. He's very interesting. He's very interesting socially. He's very interesting in that he's he's just he's way more a man of a people of the people than anybody else. And people like, he's a career

93:34politician. Yeah, but this guy is he's so different than any other career politician that's running for office. So, he's the most intriguing and intriguing to me along with Trump. And Trump, although he says a lot of really stupid things and he's he's ridiculous and he's his ego is out of control and the that he says about Mexicans is deplorable. He is so wealthy that he can do whatever the he wants and he's using all of his own money to fund this campaign and he won't be a puppet the same way that Ted Cruz or Marco Rubio or any of these other guys on the right will. Those guys scare the out of me. That Ted Cruz guy scares the out of me. He's really frightening. He's so dumb. But he's not dumb. That's what's scary. He's a he's he's very smart as far as his education, but the that he says and oh my god, I think the Hillary thing though, there's also a

94:27majority of people who from that party who will vote to keep things going on the Obama track. Yeah, I think that there's enough of that that will kind of grin and bear voting for Hillary, dude. Hillary Clinton versus Putin. I mean, who who knows what the happens if Putin decides to ramp up because Hillary becomes president. Like, that's pretty tough, though. She She had that job. You know, she had that job. Thatcher wasn't a pushover, right? She wasn't She was nasty. It's not a real queen, whatever the she was. I don't know, man. Of that little province. She's just so non-compelling to me. There's nothing she says that's interesting. There's a great photo uh that I put up on Instagram that somebody made of the difference between Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton and it's in regard to their response like what is the Olive Garden? Like how do how do you feel

95:22about the Olive Garden? And that's funny. I'll show have Jamie pull it up because it's so hilarious. But it is how I feel about Hillary Clinton. Like I feel like she's she's on and on. Yeah, I know. But but you know what? It's politics, but she's also boring. Yes. And I think that is something you kind of appreciate when they're in office. Really? Yes. Obama's kind of boring and wonkish and it but it just kind of no drama, no big I mean, this is kind of I'm talking against her at the same time, but with Obama, there was no scandal. There was no douchery. There was no things taking us off track. It just kind of went to work methodically. It wasn't flashy. It wasn't exciting. But things improved. Here it is. Olive Garden. An authentic Italian restaurant for the whole family, says Hillary. Bernie. Only when I'm high. That makes sense. That totally. Yeah. There's a whole series. That's

96:24great. I just think that um this is just there's no one that really grabs me. Like Al Gore Al Gore when he was running opposite of Bush was compelling. I'm like, here's a guy who cares a lot about the environment, you know, and people are, oh, he's That movie and inconvenient truth is filled with inconvenient facts and and lies and propaganda. Not one question about climate change in the Republican debates. Yeah, they want to keep the that on the DL. Not one pill addictions, like we're saying, pharmaceutical addictions, cigarettes. I mean, if there was a drug that just got released that's killing as many people as cigarettes, that would be the number one hot topic for debate, right? Right. If there was a a disease like the Zit virus that was killing a half million people, it would be the number one hot huge topic of debate. Half a million people a year in

97:11this country alone. But cigarettes skirt right under the radar. Yeah. It's because the amount of money they contribute. Yeah. Same thing with pharmaceutical drugs. Absolutely. The heroin problem in New Hampshire, right? Well, why do you think they're drumming up such fear about all the terrorism and because these guys want to come? It's the same thing with the industrial complex. They want to just those guys spend a lot of money on those politicians. Well, you also know the whole reality of the New Hampshire heroin problem was entirely spawned entirely spawned by Oxycottton, right? It was people that got Oxycontton. They got them easy and and cheaply and then they cramped down on it when they found that all these people were addicted. So what did they do? Did they fix it? Did they cure their addiction? No. They made these poor people try to figure out some other way to get their fix. And

98:01the way to do that was heroin. A cheaper way to get it. It's the only way to get it. The only way to get it because they couldn't get the pills anymore. So they started shooting up. That's where it came from. Exactly. It was all spawned out of the prescription drug problem that we have in this country. Right. Apparently that movie that those guys came in here, this prescription thugs, apparently it's very good. And there's some insane stats statistics about it. And I'll try to get those guys to come back in and uh talk about it after um um they're they're doing their their press cycle right now and after I watch it. But uh the same guys who did Bigger, Stronger, Faster, which was an expose on steroids, did this expose on prescription drugs. Yeah. Chris Bell and Mark, his brother. But it's uh terrifying stuff. Terrifying. Terrifying. Oh, what's so scary as a

98:49parent is that you could basically raise this beautiful person for their whole life and get to the whatever age. Let's put them as, you know, 17 to 25 when they're out on their own doing their thing. One bad summer, one horrible week, one intense weekend and you can lose them. Well, how about this? Someone could give them something and they can die from it. Yeah. Someone can lie to them. Someone could Bill Cosby them and give them some that they think is going to whack them out so they can have sex with your daughter and they could die of an overdose. That happens. It's insane. Yeah. You can't even You can't even have your kids like go to a party. You can't eat drink. You can't have a sour patch kid. Well, especially can't do any I know women have to be very careful about what they drink. You know, I I know I know people who've been drugged. I know I've met people who've

99:39been drugged. It's very common. Guys drop things in women's drinks completely. It's terrifying man. Terrifying. This is Bill Cosby thing is, you know, I think it's it's awful and it's horrific, but it at least it's opening up this discussion that I think we need to have in this country about men who are willing to drug women and have sex with them while they're out. That is a creepy sociopathic, psychopathic type of person. So creepy. It's scary. It's really And powerful people like him. Yeah. Wasn't the other one from that that singing show? He was he was given uh allegedly wasn't CEO Green busted for Yeah. Yeah. He was given girls ecstasy. Just without them knowing. Yeah. Allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly. The guy who looks like a peanut M&M was trying to get get some buzzing. Get some and couldn't do it any other way. How odd. You think that I met him once on a plane. I was like, "Whoa,

100:36Jesus Christ. For sure. Stop eating, dude. Settle down. gluten, grains, everything, whatever you're eating. Steak bowls, stop it. He had that one song, that you song. It's a great song. It was a good song. And that launched the whole thing. But um since those allegations, I think he's kind of disappeared, right? Yeah. I don't know what the deal is. I mean, he might be in the middle of a trial or something. I mean, just to knock them out. Well, ecstasy doesn't knock him out, but I think it makes him much more willing to have sex. Yeah. But back to the Cosby thing, like what you're saying, like that issue of guys that are just willing to knock women out, how do you feel good about yourself the next as soon as it's over? It's not about that. It's about getting back at women. I think I think Yeah, I think there's women out there that um hate men and there's men out there that hate

101:26women. I think at this point it's ridiculous to pretend anything different. And I think there's a direct correlation between people that have been rejected and people that have associated women with someone who's going to turn them down or treat them like because they're not physically attractive. Like this guy was built like a peanut M&M, right? You know, you know, I was lucky enough where I never had those interactions with girls coming up, you know. Were you funny? Was funny and pretty good-looking. Were you? No. But uh meeting friends as an adult who women just uh screw them over in their m in their in their fable. Mhm. Uh they come out with a whole different view of womanhood. Yeah. I mean mine was really pleasant and I always see women as the victim or I always see women and the guys who had a really shitty time and they got dumped on and whatever. There's

102:20a rage that these guys carry around. Oh yeah. that it's really just kind of like a stroke of luck that when I was young I met the nice ones. You know what I mean? These guys are really like, you know, you see guys like they kind of say jokes about like knocking a girl out and doing all this kind of but it's not really they're not really kidding in a way. Yeah. You know what I mean? Right. Right. There's a darkness anytime you talk about women with these guys. Well, there's always going to be people that got over by somebody. And if you are involved in a horrific divorce, and I have a friend who was involved in a horrific divorce that took years, and I've talked about on this podcast, adnauseium, unfortunately, he's he's got to pay her for the rest of his life, right? Cuz they were married for 12 years. So, uh, he like she's a grown woman. Like, if you have a kid,

103:06when the kid's 18, they're on their own. Yeah. But not not a woman. Like, if you have a woman, you're married to her for 12 years. By the way, they were divorced more than 12 years ago. So, he has to pay her forever. Oh my god. Forever. forever until she dies. Till she dies. So if she gets in some life extension some new science comes out, he and he lives for 500 years and she lives for 500 years, he's going to have to pay her for some that he doesn't even remember anymore. Oh my god. And I'm not talking about a small amount of money either. He's wealthy. So he's paying her hundreds of thousands of dollars a year. More than a half a million, I think. So what's his rage like? Oh, it's crazy. If you get him started up, he just need he literally needs a drink. Really? like it it'll just start bubbling in his mind because the whole thing was a California.

103:48Yeah. Yeah. There's bad divorce laws and there's horrible ones and if you get the wrong lawyer and she gets the right one, that's a wrap, son. Oh god. It's just insane that you don't have to move on with your life like as a woman that if a woman's married to a guy and we're not talking about someone with children, she doesn't even have any children, right? Like there's this is indefensible because I've heard people say no children. I've heard people say, "Yeah, but you know she's got to raise the kids." What kids? No kids. And when you tell them that they go, "Wait, what?" Right. Yeah. No, she doesn't even have any kids and he has to pay her for ever. Oh my god. Forever. Millions of It'll be millions and millions of dollars by the time she's dead. Jeez. For nothing. For nothing. Forgot. They had a relationship. They enjoyed time together and he didn't want to be with her

104:34anymore. So he has to pay her forever. Oh, it's a the most horrific form of prostitution known to man. Oh my god. Yeah, it's crazy. Oh, it's crazy. We're not talking about child support. That's insane. Yeah. We're not talking even about a woman who like put the guy through school while he was working on his engineering degree or something like that and then he went on to become successful and tried to abandon her and she's like, "Hey, I put you through school. I'm responsible for part of your success." That makes a lot of sense. Nope. Never worked. Never. Never. never worked while she was with him. Never worked. Oh my god. Yeah. Don't worry, baby. I'll take care of you. You don't have to work. How does the law support that? Cuz they're It's just a a festival up there. Whoever creates it, whoever enforces it, whoever looks at that on paper and says, "That's good. That's how it's written.

105:25You should a meteor should come from God's hand and blow your brains out." It's insane. That is crazy town. It's so gross. It's so scary. It's scary. It's really scary. What if he just got a job as a bus boy? Well, he's responsible. And went to like a studio apartment and didn't make that much money anymore. Well, I've got another one. Uh Dave uh um Koulier. No. God damn it. From uh news radio. Jesus Christ. Dave Foley. What's Why' I draw a blank on Dave? Cuz uh this one hurts my brain so much I I draw blanks with it. Oh no. Dave Foley uh got divorced and his wife wanted um money that is like the the way they established how much money he was going to pay her was depending upon how much money he was making at the time. So he was on news radio when they got divorced. So that was the highlight of his entire life as far as how much money he's ever going to make in a month.

106:20Right. So they based it on a percentage of that like 50% of that which he will never I mean right now he's never made I mean I don't know if he will maybe he will he's a very talented guy he might have a hit next week but as far as right now he's never made that kind of money ever again in his life so he owes hundreds of thousands of dollars can't go to Canada if he goes to Canada they'll arrest him and the the judge literally said to him your ability to pay has no relation to your obligation to pay. So, yeah, you have an obligation to pay. I do not care if you're if you're able to. You have an obligation to make more money. Oh my god. But and and that's the judge's words to his face. And it's not like to make, you know, even a $100,000 working at a straight gig. That's like winning the lottery. They based it on his winning ticket. Yeah. He won the lottery based on five

107:15years. He won for a network show. Yeah. He won. He got the cushiest spot ever, which is a network sitcom in the '9s, right? Back when they were real. It's not a You cannot They don't even exist anymore. Complicate that. How many sitcoms are there now? There are 10. Oh my god. There's a million actors in Hollywood trying to get on 10 sitcoms, right? You know. Oh. Oh. And he's 50some, so it's not going to happen. Holy. I mean, they don't want the 50some guy. They want the guy that he was in the 90s. They want the 30-year-old guy. Oh my god. Oh, what a nightmare. Christ. And he's another one. You're around him when he talks about it and you just I need a drink. I need a drink. You start Oh, that's so sad. Ice cubes, hands, glasses, and whiskey starts pouring. You're like, And he is the nicest guy. He is one of the handful of nicest people I've ever met in my life. And when he talks

108:07about his ex-wife, he just goes, "She's a She is a fuck." And she will not negotiate. She will not lessen his money. She will not She doesn't give a She wants to torture him. She's a crazy What is that? Crazy person. Oh, that's so gross. But that's these crazy laws. And when people say, "Well, why do you think why?" Like I even my own wife like I say that do I say marriage is It's ridiculous. I'm happy. I'm happily married. I love her. She's great. I love having a family, but it it is dumb. Well, you shouldn't say that. It's dumb. It's dumb. I shouldn't say it. If you were making all the money, you'd say it, too. It's crazy. It is. It's a It's a legal contract with the state that involves two people getting along. That's insane. It's one of the most transient things that we can do is try to establish sexual relationships with each other. How often those

108:58things last. I know. None of them last forever. Well, it's really a it's really a business. You're really creating a business. Yes. And it becomes a big business as you go further on and bring on other employees and children and that kind of thing. And this is why you're not allowed to have sex with your co-workers because that makes things very complicated, right? Yeah. If you if you have a job and you have a secretary and you start banging your secretary and she's a part of this business that you've created with your wife, you got real issues. You're experiencing pleasure from someone else and that's like, you know, like if you are working on a set, you can't plug something in because there's a union electrician, right? It's his job, right? You need that union electrician. Otherwise, that guy wouldn't really be able to justify his position. Yeah. Well, your your wife is

109:42your dick technician. And if you your secretary, not only does she handle your paperwork, but also handles your dick. Well, we got a problem here. Yeah, cuz uh we have one too many employees. It's very complicated. Yeah. Well, this um try and keep that on the rails. Yeah. This secretary is really good at plugging things in. And um I just feel like I don't need someone else. So, it's over, The kids are 18. off. Well, there's going to be a big lawsuit. Oh, yeah. Mattaline Albbright on speed dial. Next thing you know, does it count where you got married or is it where you got divorced? I think where you got married is big. It's the bigger part of it. Yeah, it's a big one. So, if you get married in California, that's like one of the worst places. One of my Yeah, it's one of the worst places. One of my favorite stories was this New York um really wealthy millionaire,

110:31multi-millionaire business guy marries this young lady. He's in his 60s. She's in her 30s. She's hot as He marries her. And then when he marries her, he immediately files for divorce in the Dominican Republic. Believe it was Dominican Republic. Look the story up cuz it was real recent. She had no idea. They were married the entire time she thought they were married. But he had filed for a divorce and had attorneys represent her and him in absentia. He paid for both lawyers, won the case, and got divorced. So he's country, another country. So, he's saying, "We're not married, We got divorced weeks afterwards. Here's my paperwork. It's It's binding in the Dominican Republic. This is a legal document." Really? Where'd they get married? I don't know. Question. Yeah, I think so. In the States. Jeez. Yeah. MC Jagger tried to do the same thing with Jerry Hall. Oh, really? Yeah. He's like,

111:25"Bitch, we didn't even get married in America. We got married on like a coconut island somewhere." Yeah. So, he was saying that that didn't count either. Oh my god. You find the guy? Yeah. Here's the guy. Husband secretly divorced wife after wedding to protect his assets. And look at him and look at her. She's hot and young. Of course. Yeah. They were married for 20 years, raising a son, and living a good life in between homes in New York and France. Oh my god. It was all perfect except one thing. He had secretly divorced her just months after their wedding in an apparent attempt to shield his assets. That is hilarious. He's 90. Yeah. And now she's 59. She's suing her 90-year-old husband uh to nullify the divorce that she never knew about and keep him from selling an apartment that they shared. That's hilarious. So, they met in 1994. So, they met when he was 70.

112:20Jesus Christ. He knew what was going on. Yeah. He was 70 and she probably said no to the prenup. And she was more than 30 years uh his senior. Huh. So, she was like somewhere around 30 something and he was old as marrying a 70-year-old guy. She says, "It's a fraud." She tells the post, "Well, what's the fraud?" You know what? Wait, which one's the fraud? What did you do to get that apartment? Where did Where's your money coming from, lady? How's that work? But it's not good enough. See, we've established that when someone marries someone, they won the lottery. when you marry some old rich dude like that guy, you've won the lottery and then you deserve to get paid from winning that lottery. But the reality is what what what exactly was going on in that relationship? They were together and he made all the money and she wants some of that money that he made while she was living in the same

113:14place as him. That's really what it is. Yeah. If you're an athlete, you know, like a professional athlete, how do you possibly meet someone and think this is not going to go against you? Well, sometimes it works. Sometimes you can meet the right people, man. It's just it's really who are you, who are they, it's it's so hard to generalize and some relationships work great and some marriages work great. Yeah. Some marriages where both people make a similar amount of money and no one is really in it for the money and they just they they have a modest living and they enjoy themselves and they just love being together and they like the fact that they wear a ring and hey that's my wife, that's my husband, we're happy. We love it. This is great. That's nothing wrong with that. The real problem is when you break up. That's why like my buddy who went through this horrific

113:58horrific divorce. Yeah. He married a new woman after that. And she didn't want to sign a prenup and he was going crazy, you know? And I and and everyone was screaming at him. All of his friends like, "Do not do this. You have to find a sol." She's like, "You're saying that it's not going to work." He's like, "No, because if it doesn't work, then the prenup doesn't mean anything." Yeah. And he has a history. No, he's saying if it doesn't work, the prenup is is valuable. it comes in handy. But if it does, like what I'm saying is if this marriage works, if you do your part, I do my part, we work it out, we we make it beautiful, we stay together forever, the prenup doesn't mean right? Because we'll be together forever, right? So if the marriage is going to work out, it only it only means something if it doesn't work out. If you're looking at it as an investment, Yeah. So what she

114:43is hoping for or what she's saying essentially is if it doesn't work out, I want you to get over again. Right. And you're protecting yourself. You're protecting yourself from the legal system. that's set up to you. If you if you and I don't want to be together anymore, you have to get punished. You must be punished financially. And he has a whole story that he can hold up in front of her like you know why I'm suffering. And he works like long hours. He's got a prenup. He does. Yeah. He got through it. Yeah. He would He wouldn't do it. He He No. How could you? The beating that he took was so bad. He lost a house. He lost I mean the whole story is comical. the the ex-wife lives in with a guy now, but she's not allowed to. So, when they go to inspect the house, the guy literally puts all his stuff in a U-Haul, drives around the corner, waits for the inspector to leave, and drives back. No,

115:31it's a game. Can he get a private investigator or something? Doesn't matter. You have to prove it. The private investigator, what what evidence did he discover? Like, you can't you there's only so much privacy you can violate in someone's home. It's not his home. You know what I'm It's not like his own home where he could put a camera in his own home and catch his wife banging some personal trainer. This is not that. This is her house now. By the way, multi-million dollar house in the Palisades overlooking the ocean. No. All hers. Oh god. Oh, it hurts. When you find out what can happen to you in a divorce, it's horrific. But what happens if he seriously gets a job working at a diner and he's like, "No, no one will hire me." He would have to go back to court and he would have to figure out a way to get a judge to agree to lower the terms. But the problem is he's

116:22responsible for maintaining her lifestyle. So if he takes that job, he could actually be put in prison. Yes. Cuz he's not making enough. Exactly. Holy cow. Well, he would have to get a judge that agrees to maintain to lower the lifestyle that he has been that he's obligated to maintain. He's he's obligated to maintain a certain lifestyle for her. Oh my god. It's insane because we're not talking about substant like we're not talking about subsistence. We're not talking about like you have to you have to give her $50,000 a year and that's enough for her to survive on and you know she doesn't that way she doesn't have to get a job or maybe you have to give her $100,000 for two years until she can figure out how to get a job. Like that's she's a human being. She's a person. Yeah. She's intelligent. She's articulate. She has an education. Like she's not a handicap person. She's not

117:10diseased. Like she's not broken like where she can't work. She doesn't have feet. No. She's she's like a regular person. She's a regular person. It's it's it's madness, man. I mean, it is truly madness. It's really the worst case scenario. But you don't The thing is, unless you're with these people, you don't know these stories, right? Unless you know someone that's gone through this, you don't know these stories. And then when you hear these men's rights groups and then you hear feminists mock men's rights groups, like this is this is the reason why a lot of people won't take feminism seriously. And this because a lot of them mock these men's rights groups. And this is also the reason why a lot of these men's rights groups have a valid point cuz there's a lot of men's rights points that are stupid as far as like what do you care if these feminists don't like

117:53you? What do you care if they about the way you act or dress? Unless you work with them, what do you care? You know, if you're if you're trapped in some office with some man-hating woman and she has a position above you and she's making your life hell. Well, that's no different than being trapped in an office with some sexist pig man. If you're a woman, it's it's terrible if someone is gender specifically biased in any way, shape, or form, right? But unless you see the devastation that it can like it overwhelms someone's life, like Dave Foley's life from the time that I met him to the time that he got divorced when he was on news radio, his life has been overwhelmingly influenced by this woman that he used to be married to that he doesn't even know anymore. I mean, he doesn't see her anymore. He hasn't he hasn't se had sex with her in decades. Oh, but they're still inexraably

118:43connected financially and it has ruined his life. These are two just two people I know, two successful men who have to pay the women that they used to sleep with more than 20 years ago. They he has to they have to pay them forever. Oh my god. And that's just one story. And and it's the the problem is the court system. And this is one of the things that I was going over with Phil Hartman before his wife murdered him. Yeah, I was telling him, you know, I'm I I grew up in um a really up house. Like when I was little, my my parents split up when I was young. There was violence and there was just like And my mom when my dad hit my mom, my mom got her and got the out. I saw it. I saw him hit her. I And then we moved to my grandpa's my my grandfather's house like immediately afterwards. We were out. Yeah. And apparently he had done it before and you know he terrorized her

119:35and she was like this this we're gone. Right. So my in my mind when goes bad you got to pull strings. Get just get out. Just get out. So I was telling Phil I go dude get out of there man just get out. And he was like he was like it's not that simple. He's like uh you don't give half. I was like give her half. He's like it's not half. He goes it's two/3s cuz the lawyers get a third. He goes it's a business. He's like, "You have to understand there's a business involved in law. There's a business involved in divorce." First of all, he had to pay for her lawyer. He's like, "I have to pay for her lawyer. I have to pay for my lawyer." And there's two lawyers. They're going to battle it out and they're going to drag it out as long as possible to make the most money on the case. Just ruin your life. Oh, it's Well, they get a percentage and they get legal. They get paid by the hour. So,

120:20the whole thing is just brutality. Keep it going. Brutality. And if you have somebody who's a little off, you can just keep fueling the fire. She'll just keep it going. Well, you know Carl Leau. Yeah. Okay, how about this one? Carl Leau, who used to be in the Outlaws of Comedy with Sam Kenisonson. Sam Kenisonson Carl Leau's wife and got her pregnant. Carl Leau was raising Sam Kenisonson's child thinking it was his own. Right. Got a DNA test after Sam Kenisonson died. Found out it wasn't his child. Tried to get out of paying child support and they said, "No, you have to pay child support forever." So Carl Leau owes hundreds of thousands of dollars for Sam's baby and he he for Sam's baby he's He um his credit is ruined. He doesn't have a car. I mean he's he's devastated. Just a working comic. Just just a comic. Yeah. I mean not not I mean a road comic

121:14guy who does you know he does well. He's you know he does headlines but he can't wait. It's not like a Yeah. But so he tried to fight it and lost and so now he because he lost he has to pay but he's responsible for another man's child. His wife had an affair and it doesn't matter. Why does that not matter? Because we are living in a system that looks women are over in this country. Let's just let's just make this this a caveat. Women get over in this country all the time. I mean, there's absolutely uh besides what we're talking about with men that are willing to drop pills and girls drinks, there's women that work in offices with pieces of for bosses and they sexually harass them and with them and make their life horrible and create this boys club environment that makes it terrible for them to work in. There's absolutely that. There's absolutely but when it

122:04comes to divorce and when it comes to a man who makes money and the the the preying upon that man that happens it's it's horrific. It's horrific. That should be a documentary. Well, it's someone should follow those stories around. Really? That would be really because people don't know those stories. Yeah. An inconvenient truth. It's another one. Another inconvenient truth. So, it's you know it's it's bad, man. There's a lot of people. What state was Leo? What was that? California. California. California has that law. And in some ways, I kind of understand because like look, um I have a stepdaughter and she's as far as I feel she's my daughter. I mean, I treat her like she's my daughter. And if I found out that one of my actual daughters was actually not my biological daughter, I wouldn't love them any less. No. Um I wouldn't want my wife to get giant

122:54chunks of money because of it. But if it was about supporting the kid, I would never change that. I would never change that because that's but his case is more than that. It's to support her also. Well, that's a up situation, man. It's goddamn Sam Kenisonson. Like, why doesn't the Sam Kenisonson estate? I mean, how much money are they making, right? How come they're not Why don't they pay it, right? That's his kid. You're talking about a a wealthy man who died who's one of the greatest comics who ever lived. I could only assume like I read something the other day that said that Liverpool, just Liverpool, gets $100 million a year from the Beatles. Wow. I don't know how the that works, but just the taxes involved, you know, the amount of money that they generate from their portfolio. Yeah. The taxes from all the sales. Who knows, right? You're not making much off

123:41Kenison anymore, though. Yeah. Can But Kenisonson had to have generated a few million. Yeah. But that's gone, right? I mean, there's a whole generation that doesn't even know Sam anymore, unfortunately. God, how's that possible? Isn't that crazy? There's a kid that does a great impression of Kenisonson and he went up in the factory. Yeah, I think so. And no one these kids at the factory had no idea who he's talking about. Well, that's the thing. We were talking about this OJ case. Yeah. Like you and I, we were around when the OJ trial was going on, but a lot of kids today, they don't even have any idea what this is about. No clue. No idea. We're old, dude. How old are you? I know. How old are you? 39. I'm 48. Ah, so am I. No. How old are you for real? 47. Yeah. That's funny. Yeah. Yeah, it gets you, man. It's all of a sudden you're like, "Holy we've lived we've we've been around.

124:34We've seen some shit." But then you see people older. I always gravitate towards those people. I'm like, "He's still rocking it. He's still going." Some people are, but less less. Why? Cuz they die. Yeah. Well, as I you know, like uh Jamie and I were just talking about this. Me and uh Brian Callen were uh we were doing this uh podcast the other day about uh we had there was a we do this podcast called the Fight Companion and it's uh uh we watch the UFC fights and we talk about fighting, we get drunk and get And in in one of the the little exchanges that we have, we were Brian was throwing kicks and I was teaching them how to throw kicks, right? And one of the things that people were saying like these guys are 50. How are they even doing that? Jesus Christ. It's like they think we're dead. Like, but then I'm like, well, how many people do I know that are 50 that are that are

125:19taking care of themselves? It gets to a number. I know. You know, I'm 48 years old. When I'm 90, I'm probably not going to be able to do any of these things. That's just a fact. So, I'm halfway to not being mobile being able to do any of that. Yeah, man. I mean, what at what level or what age do you get where your body just doesn't work right anymore? I Well, that's the thing. If you're active, you got to stay active. You got you got to stay. I mean, no joking when going to that yoga class where it's, you know, the after drop off and there's some older people to see like a 70-year-old woman in there like standing on her head and doing a, you know, backward back bend. It's like because she kept doing that, that's why she's able to do that now. That's one of the things this uh the place that I go to has some really good instructors and one of the things that this lady was

126:04talking about was she's in her I want to say she's in her 60s and she was saying that if you just maintain your practice and keep doing it you can be healthy and mobile deep into your 90s and a lot of it is just people neglecting their body atrophy where just Yeah. You see people that can't even touch their toes anymore. Yeah. It's weird. You got to go to the gym. Yeah. Yeah. And and as you get older, one really important thing is lifting weights. It's very important for older people because you need to maintain muscle mass just to avoid being injured and bone density. Don't they say like you have to really max out as much as you can up until up to 50? Like it's because that's when you really start to fall off muscle-wise. Um I don't know. I haven't heard that. No, I mean you you're you're slowly falling off from the time you're like 30. The the whole key is just maintaining a

126:57level of activity. You have to maintain a level of activity, but also maintain a level of maintenance. And that's where I really love yoga because yoga is taking care of a lot of like weird back pains that I used to have and pains and weird It's weird, isn't it? All of a sudden all this goes away. Like all that tension's kind of gone. It's amazing. It is amazing. It's there's a reason why those skinny in India have been doing it for a thousand years. You're right. It's really good for you. I know. It's Do you do it high? You ever do it high? No. No. No. No. No. Really? Yeah. It's the way to do it. Do you get high? How often you get high? Not that often anymore. What does that mean? Once a month. Once a year. Once every couple of months. Yeah, you should do it. Get I want to do it all the time. If you don't have anything to do during the day. When does that happen? Well, if just take a

127:47day, take a day where you tell your agent or whoever the it is that bothers you. Say, "Listen, Tom is off the grid today." Then I'm also telling my wife, "I'm not picking the kids up and I'm not doing the No. What time do you have to pick your kids up?" Four. Four. You're good. Take a 9:00 a.m. class. You'll be fine. Yeah. Just get barbecued. Drop the kids off. Drop the kids off. Take four strong hits and go to yoga class. Really? You will feel your body in a way where you've never felt it before. You'll feel like your vertebrae stretching and the tissue in your neck loosening and it's like it I'm doing that tomorrow. Well, that's one of the secrets of the sadus and the the the yogis of India is they would they would smoke all these chillums. They would smoke hash. They were all hash heads and they would go and do their practice. It's a big part of it. Yeah. I'm going

128:34to try it. I want it so bad. I can completely Yeah. Can feel it. For the first time in my life, I've always been active. Always. For the first time in my life, I have this issue where I've got a muscle under here, under the first rib that's tight, and it's affecting back here down to my arm. Like, and it's affecting how it's cutting off whatever nerves are running down here. Oh, it's like it's constricting. It's raising the this rib. It's actually it's just all tight. The the muscle's tightened. The rib is pulled up and it's pinching on the stuff that's coming down. Do you feel any numbness sometimes? Okay. Yeah. And so I'm going to this great guy, Colinello. He's great. He works with the Clippers and stuff and he's knows exactly where it is and he's and it's helping, but he's like, "Do not sleep on your stomach." He just goes in and loosens it up and it's basically just

129:25kind of releasing the tension of it tissue and it's working. I'm feel it. You know, it's only a couple times. And uh there's two parts of this. One is I can't sleep. I sleep on my stomach with my head to the side. I used to do that. I my neck up doing that. That's exactly what happened. And it's really that's the cause the cause of it. And I But my sleep I'm used to doing that my whole life. Now I'm laying on my back. It's so hard to sleep. I lay on my side. You do? Yeah. I lay on my side. I put a pillow in between my legs and I lay on my side. This is I literally when I was driving here was like Joe will know. Yeah. I had the same exact issue by the way. You did. Yeah. Before I hurt my neck. I've hurt my neck from jiu-jitsu. But before I did that, I started developing problems in my neck from laying down. That's it. I had no idea it was just from laying down on your

130:16Especially if you lay down flat with and turn your head the same way, right? Always turn your head to the right. You're Always. Yeah. You Have you ever heard of those cab drivers develop swollen discs or bulging discs because they sit with a wallet in their pocket? Oh, right. Cuz just that lifting of your butt cheek an inch on one side your back up repeatedly. Yeah. So that's what you're doing when you're sleeping. Yeah. It's really bad for you. Tissue is really pliable, man. It is. And then it res like everything's out of whack. So you have to kind of like reset it. He'll reset me and then it's like, "All right, just don't lift your arm and try and be cool and just kind of let it learn that it's got it's back in its place." You see that little ball? That little blue ball right here? Hold on a second. Yeah. The little blue one behind the creepy guy. Oh, this heavy Oh,

131:03what's this? That is uh that's called a mobility wad supernova. That's a smaller one. I actually prefer There's a larger one that we have around here somewhere. Um I I give them to people because I want people to use these things. People have sore backs. What you do is you put it on the ground or on a wall and you back up against it and like put your weight on it and you rub it up and down like you roll the ball and it breaks up all the scar tissue and loosens up all the tendons and all the fascia. It's painful, but if you can if you can bite your teeth and get through it, it'll make a significant difference in loosening up your muscles. It's such a strange idea. Like I've never had any issue. I've worked out. I was an athlete my whole life. never literally have ever been like, "Oh, that hurt." for the first time. And I had no idea the concept that all the tissue and tendons

131:54are just tightening and I'm just ending up like like a like a hunchback. Well, that's all the one of the things that pot will help. Yeah. Cuz you feel all those things. You feel all those tense. Like marijuana, it's almost like it whatever sensitivity you have about your body awareness ramps it up to 10. I mean, it's why sex feels so good when you're when you smoke pot because it just ramps up all the feeling. It just just it changes the way you interface with the nerve endings. I'm scared now to lift. For the first time, I'm not lifting really for like since like October. Ooh, that's not good. Cuz that'll it up even more cuz you you lose Yeah. You lose strength in your back, right? You need to go to a personal trainer that understands how to strengthen that area to keep this whole thing from happening, right? I mean, he works with the Clippers. He's a And he's

132:41I mean two times and it's like all right, we're on to it. Like I Yeah. Sounds you have a good massage therapist guy, right? That's what he does. He's massage therapist. He's a He's like a chiropractor. See, I don't I think chiropractors are mostly I don't know if he's physical therapist or chiropractor. I don't know what he is. I think chiropractors are mostly They're Well, I've been to some cracking and nonsense. Yeah. Yeah. I think they're mostly But one of the things that they do do is all the other stuff outside of back cracking like cold lasers work and massage works and there's a lot of other different effective methods of alleviating pressure and tension that work. But all that back cracking stuff like if you talk to like most people that uh that study it and that try to figure out what exactly they're doing, they're like this, they're not doing anything, right?

133:29They're popping things in place. If you have something really up, yeah, maybe, you know, maybe if something's like really out of whack and they can straighten it out. But most of the time, that's not what's going on. Most of the time, you're just getting this sort of placebo effect where they're pushing on your back and making a noise. Pop pop pop. Oh, we got it. We got it. You're good, Tom. You're like, I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I feel great. No, this guy, I mean, I was really a mess. Yeah. I mean, I literally I couldn't go like this without this just going numb. And uh he got I mean he was just like no it's right in here and then I like cool for you know a week and then I'm sleeping. I'm literally you got to do it every week. Yeah. You got to loosen it up. I mean it sounds like you have a real ser Have you ever gone you ever had roughing done? Ralphing is like a very

134:15painful method of deep tissue massage where they're they're stretching out your fascia and loosing up all these binding connective scar tissue, all that stuff. And uh that that can be super effective. It's all the scar tissue just from whatever abuse you didn't like. Yeah. Muscle poles that heal funny really heal tense up me especially if you have a bad pull. But I've had a bunch of them. There scar tissue all over my back. But I think yoga fixed a lot of it. Like really a lot. I don't have any back issues now. But I do feel like as much as I love yoga, I do feel like you have to keep lifting. Yes. And I haven't literally because this started getting becoming a problem like around October, November. And I literally feel like soft. Yeah. The there's people that don't think that, you know, and I don't I just don't think they're right. If you talk to like people that are experts in

135:03physical culture, you know, people that really understand like what what do you do what do you need to do to keep your body at its most effective operating level. Yeah. And they say it's a bunch of different stuff. It's like you have to do cardio, you have to lift weights, you have to stretch. Yoga is part of that. Yeah. It's part of it. I was just I was just in uh Hawaii doing a gig and uh I'm at the pool and just like you know they have the the no kids pool like the serenity pool kind of thing. So I'm there and so it's all guys that are like you know late 30s to mid60s. Every guy walking around there was like guys that were athletic, you know, like you could tell. And then there's guys that are a complete mess and then there's a whole bunch in the middle. The dad bod. The dad bod. A little pudgy and no shoulders. They all their shoulders have disappeared. You

135:52could just see it just a bone into I don't want to be ready to tear off. It's really what it was. Try to pick up a suitcase and just Yeah. Just from your basic life. It's like that's You can't end up like that. No, you can't. Well, some people they don't have a job like we have, you know? I know. It's hard. That's what I was talking about. My friend who got divorced and over. That guy works 12 hours a day. Yeah. When's he going to go to the gym? He probably would be better off though. He gets a trainer and sometimes he goes on his lunch break and stuff like that. But the reality is he's working. Yeah. You know, I know he's got to pay for his divorce, but if he can work out, then it's kind of like uh you're anti-depressant. He should move to Argentina. You should just stockpile all of his cash, get a fake passport, and just you're on your own, hooker, and just go. They can't come get

136:39you, right? If they don't know where he is, they can't come get you. I mean, it's not like he's But if they do, I couldn't live with the paranoia. That's true. Especially thinking, yeah, right. You're on the beach having a great time. This is the life. Unless they catch me and then it's not the life. Life in prison. Do you have a card? Yeah, everybody does. You don't have one. I don't. I'll get you one. I've been so out of it. Come on. It's not hard. I know. Just bring you to a place. This is Tom Pa. Hi, Tom. What's going on? I need pot. Okay. I'm so out of it. I after I was every day for like a decade and then just stopped. Stopped. It's hard when you have responsibilities too. And I wasn't as funny. It was hurting my funny. Was it really? It was making me lethargic. Oh, it was making me Yeah. It was making me uh not as funny. Well, there's different kinds of

137:31pot, too. And there's different reactions that people have to pot. Like some people pot makes me more active, believe it or not. Yeah. Kind of ramps me up. Yeah. sativas especially, right? And it makes me like really like ramped up. Like I want to like go watch documentaries on space and write sh write down, you know? Like sometimes I'll smoke pot before I get in the sensory deprivation tank and I don't get I don't even get in the tank because I have an idea and I have to write and I find myself in front of my computer for hours just writing. Sativa does that. Yeah. Yeah. And what's the other kind? Indica. Indica. Indica is like the couch weed. That's the physical. That's like boy. They're both physical. Yeah. They're both, but it's not. It's more of a sedative. Right. Right. Right. More. It's like it's great for people in pain. Like people that are in a lot of pain

138:16love indica, like back pain. Like, oh, relaxes them. Is there anything to what Neil Young was talking about of chewing uh coffee beans? Makes you less paranoid. Did you ever heard that one? Well, caffeine definitely alleviates a lot of the issues with THC. You know, if you're really too high, the best thing you could do is drink something with caffeine in it. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's it's it severely mitigates the effects of THC. Like if you if you go to like if you're way too high, just go to Starbucks, get a venty coffee, and just sit down, right? Relax a little. It'll the the caffeine will have a pretty big impact on But beans, um especially like raw coffee bean, like coffee beans are very healthy for you. Yeah. Yeah. Like the actual bean itself, like especially the outside of the coffee bean, like the green part of the coffee bean, very high in antioxidants. Yeah. I figure Neil

139:07Young would knew. You know, it's funny. It's kind of like It's kind of like when you come back to a sport like I was into cycling for a while and then like didn't do it and then came back like eight years later and it's like the whole sport had changed. It just evolved so quickly and everybody knew different kind carbon fiber and all this different kind of That's the same thing with weed. It's like I've been out of it so long you come back you're like no there's a whole bunch of new things now. There's vape pens and sour gummies and and dabs. The kids try to get you to do dabs. Wacky kids. You ever heard of the dabs? No. Oh my god, dabs. It's uh it's it's really like you have all this equipment and you're taking THC wax and you're got a stick and a a torch. It's stupid. I want to go old school. I want a big fluffy I want a big fluffy tree that I can see and feel. And

139:53how about joints? Just a simple joint. Like you want to light this up right now? Just like a simple No. No. While we're here, my Tesla will drive me home. Yeah. Just get your T. You carry him around in a case. Yeah. like a gentleman. Then you got a show tonight. Are you doing a show tonight? Exactly. Be out of my head. I'll smoke this right before I go on stage. Do you really? Hell yeah. You're like a Superman. No, I'm like a normal person. No, you're not. You're the one who's got the issues, pal. Yeah, I got issues. That's That's normal. People with issues is normal. Someone that's mastering their issues. This stuff's good for you. I know it's good for you. I'm going to crash my car if I just start contact eye over here. You want just a little tiny hit? No. No. All right. What about see your kids seeing you smoking online? Well, keep them offline. How old are

140:43they? Well, the the youngest ones are seven and five. They're online and they see me smoking. We got a real problem. Two more years. Two more years. They'll be there 24 months to come up with an excuse. They're going to go back once they hit YouTube. They're just going to go through the files. Yeah. And I'll go and then that's what a dad does. You see this nice house we live in? Yeah. Daddy made this when he was high on marijuana. Marijuana is not bad for you. I don't think it's bad for you. It isn't bad. It's bad for a kid, though. Yes, it is your kids, but so is wine. I drink wine in front of my children. True. I go to a restaurant and I I'll have a couple glasses of wine in front of my children and uh I don't have any problem with it. I've let them taste it, you know. Good point. I mean, they put it in their mouth like, "It is goddamn good, right?"

141:26But wine is alcohol and you could drink yourself to death. You could drink yourself to death off of wine. People have done it before. It smells so good. Smells great. Put it out over there. But um there's nothing wrong with it, man. It's No, I know. It's all I was just in Hawaii and it was just so like Yeah. Well, especially when you're in Hawaii. Just made for it. Ah, yeah. Good lord. It's just so perfect. Hawaii has a math problem. No. Yeah. A lot of poverty. Yeah. Well, I know there's parts of it that are It's just a regular place. Yep. That's But that drives me crazy because I'm like, "Oh my god, you live in arguably the greatest spot on earth and somehow or another people get hooked on meth there." I know. And are in a horrible strip mall and Mhm. sad. It is paradise there, though. yeah. If you do it right and stay in the right places. Yeah. The people are great, too.

142:17They have a very relaxed attitude about life, you know. It's magical. It literally I mean, you're just sitting there and in the middle of the ocean. The middle of the ocean. Yeah. in this little island and all these other human beings for some whatever their reason have joined you on this island. Yeah. And there's this giant whale with its baby whale just dancing right next to you go into the water, you hear them singing. Yeah. The stars. It's just Yeah. We were there with wild dolphins and we were on this tour where you uh you put on like um snorkel gear and then they find the pods and you you they pull the boat within maybe 50 yards of the pod and then you dive in the water and swim over to the pods of dolphins. No, it was amazing. Jeez. But Hawaii's got a lot of shark attacks, man. They do. I literally was like, why aren't there more shark attacks? And when I got

143:10home, I looked it up. There's a lot of shark attacks. Well, while we were there, somebody got killed. No. Yeah. While we were there, a woman from Germany got merckked by a shark just swimming, snorkeling. Well, we've been there three times when people got jacked by sharks. No. Yep. A woman got killed and then another dude got his leg essentially ripped off. Uh he was a local Hawaiian kid who was surfing and that was on the big island. He got jacked. That was another time we were there. I was watching the news and you know, we're out there in the water calm as can be, snorkeling, having a good old time. It's uh it's nerve-wracking. That's scary. I'm glad I didn't know that when I was out there trying to look for sea turtles. Yeah. 2015 was apparently the biggest year ever recorded for shark attacks. What's the change? Climate change. Uh really water's getting warmer

143:56and they're just hanging there less food or they're mad. They're mad. They're mad at people for up the water. They know the people are to blame. I don't know what the uh reason is, but I saw that uh recently, like it was a headline of one of the uh news stories over the last couple days. The other thing that happens a lot in Hawaii, helicopter crashes. They're not that infrequent. Those tourist helicopters flipping around. Oh, really? That's a good list. Really? Yeah, dude. I've been on those things twice. Me, too. How dare you? How dare you with me after I smoke pot. Well, you ruined my Tesla experience. Now I think someone's going to send me into a tree. Oh, man. Look at that. Record number of shark attacks in 2015, though. Only six deaths. Oh, only six. Well, imagine if the wolf man only killed six people last year. People like, "Oh, it's fine to go

144:42outside with full moon. Just get out in the woods. There's not that many." What about the wolf man? No, the wolf men mostly eat deer. Yeah. The wolf man. What was the number of attacks? If there's six deaths, how many attacks were there? Say 98. 98 in one year. Yep. 98. 20. Does it say 28 more? 26 more? 26 more? Oh my god. Jesus Christ. In the previous year, number of shark attacks worldwide with 98 incidents, a whopping 26 more than the previous year. Wait. And 40 more than figure from the decade prior. That's not Hawaii though. That's international. Is it international? Does it say that? Worldwide. Worldwide. Yeah. That's not that bad if you think about it. Worldwide. Yeah. So the wolf man, if there was only like a few wolf men out there worldwide, you'd be like, "It's a full moon, but it's a nice full moon. We'll go out. We'll hear the twig snap. We'll know the the werewolf is not

145:38stealthy. They howl. They're They're scared of silver. We're fine. I don't have to go in the ocean, by the way. I can go to Hawaii and sit on a beach and be happy. I don't have to go I don't I'm not big on water stuff." No, I used to as a kid. Man, fishing in Hawaii is amazing. Yeah. Catching a fish and then bringing it back to the restaurant and they'll cook it for you. Most hotels like they'll have like a chef that if you you ask them if you go on a fishing trip, if you organize it, like a lot of them through the hotel, you organize it. You know, they they have like the little brochures like, "Hey, this guy will take you out for this kind of fish." And so, uh, last time we went out, we caught a Ono. It's called Ono or Wahoo, it's called. It was so delicious, man. Wow. And the chef prepared it three different ways. He uh grilled it, he baked it, and he served

146:28it as sashimi. Oh, and he No, four different ways cuz he made a um ceviche, too. Oh my god. Oh my god. And it was like two hours old. Jeez. That I had ceviche like that uh Costa Rica. We came back and a guy just like there like with all the just like you know Yeah. lime juice, dirt, and a hose and he's just like chopping up avocado like heaven. Best thing you've ever eaten in your life. So much fish is one of those things where it tastes so much better when it's fresh. Completely. It's the opposite with meat. Like meat actually tastes better when it sits for a while. That's why we buy dry-aged meat. Yeah. Like sit in the Yeah. Steakhouse on just on a shelf for 6 months and you're like 35 degrees they do it at. So it develops this sort of crust of bacteria on the outside. 35 degrees. If you've ever been to um like a butcher shop and seen dry-aged meat, it will queer you off of

147:22meat for a while. You'd be like, it turns green. I don't know about all this, man. By the way, queer you is not homophobic at all. Is a perfect perfectly reasonable word to use. It's in the dictionary. It's perfectly reasonable way to use it. So, it's a loophole. But, um it looks rotten and black. It looks like mold. Oh, really? It looks Yeah, because the the mold grows on the outside of the meat. And that's what's happening. It's like bacteria is destroying the outside of the meat and you cut that away and what's underneath is just tender and relaxed and delicious. Sounds like my neck after Yeah. Maybe you need some meat mold on your neck. Have you ever gone to Africa? No. I'm going in July. Why? Papa Bumbay. Papa Bumbay. I know a guy who knows a guy who is working. No, it's a guy I worked for though who's uh very wealthy and uh I did a show for them and they're

148:24sending my I just had to fly myself there with my family and they're putting it there's these luxury resorts in these national reserves in Tanzania. Oh for 10 days. So you're going to be surrounded by like lions and Oh, Tom Papa, please don't die. Yes. Oh, no. There's a lot of guys with guns that'll stand around you. Do you know about the woman who was the editor, film editor, uh video editor from Game of Thrones? No. She got pulled out of her car by a lion and killed. She did? Yes. What was she doing? She was taking photographs and she rolled down the the the window to take a better picture and the lion grabbed her and pulled her out of the car and killed her in front of everybody. Well, there's nothing they could do about it. That's not going to happen to us because we're not going to have windows and we won't make eye contact. They're open, no cameras, and um it'll be armed

149:13to the tits. I'll be honest with you, I don't I never had like a burning desire. You know, some places you want to get to like I wanted to be in Italy or you know, I had no nothing in my soul was like Africa. We must do Africa. But this opportunity came up and it seems pretty amazing. And I feel like the closer I get, the more amped I'm getting about it. But uh he was like, "I'm telling you, this will change your life. You'll just see this planet differently once you go to Africa." Africa. You would like Africa. I would think I wouldn't like malaria. So I'll watch DVDs. you and the Zika virus. I could see you in Africa. That's my ass. You're adventurous? Yes, I would go. But um I would I would definitely be worried about malaria. No, I'm worried about a lot of things for sure. But I am f I'm I'm a big fan of wildlife. I'm fascinated by the wildlife there.

150:04Although the reality of these parks is almost artificial in a lot of ways, how they maintain everything. And they they're doing it for for tourist money. Like there's almost somewhat Yeah. There's almost an artificial quality to it because you know a lot of these places are fenced in and so they even though it's thousands and thousands of acres it's like this it's some it's not quite up. It's not quite a zoo. No no feeding. Not at all. And they're still migrating and there's still all that stuff. They're not feeding them. No no no no. So it's still live and wild but it's like going to Yoseite, you know? It's like they get used to people, man. I hope so. They do. They get used to people and you're in these a lot of times you're in these open air jeeps, right? And we were talking about it on the podcast. I was saying like how how come these animals don't jump in

150:55there, right? And almost as if on Q after we said that a leopard jumped in a jeep, an open air jeep like a week later. And I was like, yeah, why isn't that happening every day? Yeah, but I I wonder what if animals like lions just start figuring that out the same way. Do you know there's been there was an article recently they were talking about chimps that they believe chimps have just started to enter the stone age for the development of chimpanzeee intelligence like they literally might be evolving before our eyes right and they started to use tools on a regular basis they observe chimps coming yeah they're coming wow this might take a few million years but if human beings have only been in this form they think for the last like 200 plus thousand years essentially unrecognizable from you or Like what the What's a chimp going to be like in a million years? Awesome.

151:45You know, might be, right? They might be like some crazy Sasquatch type thing. Some almost halfh human, half monkey thing running through the woods. And we'll just be like jellyfish with cars that drive itself. Prime for the taking. Yes. So weak. They just rip our cars apart. Just eyeballs in a mush. Our cars never crash, so we make them out of paper. That was the logic is if everyone's driving a paper car, no one's going to get hurt. So, knowing that there's that amount of shark attacks, I posted this the other day on Instagram. That's a chimp's testicle in relationship to the size of its brain. Its testicle is literally about 70 to 80% of the size of its brain. Oh my god. Is that is that a fair amount? Sure. 70. Think 70 is accurate. Uh something like that. That's made wrong. Yeah. Like se Yeah. What? is balls. One ball is 70% the size of his brain. Two balls, right? Two balls are

152:43almost a whole brain. That is weird, right? Yeah. Poor guys. It's so big. Well, you know what? The ball is in front of us. This is a perspective trick. Yeah, true. Because that guy's hands, that's not one above the other. It's one behind the other. And the other hand looks bigger and blacker. It's a different guy. It's a different guy. These Yeah. Maybe if they got it right up next to it, it would only be like 40%. Either way, it's a giant ball. I'd be very proud of that testicle. If I had a testicle like that, I'd show everybody. So, knowing that there's that many shark attacks, will you not go snorkel next time you go? Um, I'll tell you what, I was thinking about going to Paris this year, and I'm not going to Paris. You're not? Nah, I'm good. My parents made that call, too. Yeah, I think that's the right call for me. for now. You have some giant ass crazy terrorist attack like that

153:35and you have issues with immigrants and all the the craziness that's going on there. Like they, you know, they might have let some bad people in their country. They let some great people that were trying to escape a terrible place, but they also might have let some bad people in, too. And there's a lot of anti-Jewish sentiment. Although I'm not Jewish. There's some video of these people uh walking through these Arab neighborhoods in Paris and the rampant brutal like outright anti-semitism yelling it at these people. It's like that's not America. It's not I think you know we're deal you're dealing with like it's it's very tricky place right now. I know it's such a shame. It's really a beautiful I know. Stunning. So important historically. What's any update on the war? They declared war on ISIS. ISIS is How's it going? It's not even that, man. I mean, what what happened over there? I

154:26don't even understand what happened. It's when when you have a group of people and those the people that wind up performing that terrorist act wind up dying. Like, boy, try getting the truth out of all that. Trying to figure out what their motives were, what what like the San Bernardino people. Yeah. You know, like try figuring that out after the fact. Try figuring that out. I'm not going to San Bernardino either. Dropping your kids off. That's not true. I go San Bernardino. That's how a hypocrite I am. I won't go to Paris, but I'll go to San Bernardino. I bet you go to Paris if someone gave you a sweet gig there. No, no, no, no, no. I don't think so. That's a brutal flight, too, man. For a gig. It is. I I I would way rather go there and just vegetate, not have any responsibilities, than go there for That's one thing that I've really enjoyed about uh traveling is that I've

155:12I've gotten a chance to see some really cool places like England and Ireland. But one of the things that's an issue is every time I've gone I've been working. Yeah. You don't just don't have a chance to see that much. I know. I went to Italy for the first time and uh no gig at all. And I don't travel like that either, you know, normally. And uh what a difference. Oh, yeah. What a difference. Yeah, man. We, you know, like I don't know how you are, but say if I fly Chicago and I got a gig tomorrow night in Chicago, I'm going to get something to eat and I'm going to go to the gym and I'm going to go over my notes, right? I'm not going anywhere. Nope. Yeah. I I can't. No. No. I have People are like, "Yo, don't you go sightseeing?" They don't realize everything you do during that day takes away from the show. Yeah. There's just an energy, mental and physical energy

155:57that does not end up in the show. Unless it's, you know, something that's going to enhance the show, like going over your notes, like uh that sitting there, but not running around town, getting cabs, do talking to waiters. Sometimes a little bit of activity and sightseeing can amp you up, you know, but you have to have the time to do it. And it can't be taken away from like for me exercise is mandatory. Yeah. Like if I I go on the road like one of the most important things for me is almost immediately I have to exercise. Really? Yeah. Because if I don't then I'm going to be tired. Like I'll get there and I'm like, "Oh, flying. Oh, it's bullshit." But what you got to do is say, "Shut up, Just put your shorts on and let's do this." What floor is the gym on? Thank you. Here we go. Get on the machine and just go. or a routine, whatever I'm doing, whatever weightlifting routine, I just

156:45make sure I do it. I don't want to do it, but I act like I have a boss. I should do that more. If you do that, man, I'm telling you, just write it down so that it's not an option to deny. Like, unless you're sick or something like that, then you definitely shouldn't work out, right? But if you can do that, just it's just it's 40 minutes that you would just be jerking off and reading email. It's true. Right. Totally. So, that 40 minutes will go by and you're like, "Fuck, I missed the window." And I've done that before, too. I've definitely done that before. And you're tired. Yes. But when I when I say no, I'm going to go down there and I'm going to do, you know, whatever 45 minutes on the elliptical machine. Just go. Just do it. Listen to a podcast. I'll put a podcast on. Just force myself. Yeah. I do I do a couple yoga stretches. That's good. That'll help. That is

157:30there's a couple now. There's a couple that are, but for me, um, strenuous exercise is really good for just resetting everything, your whole nervous system. Do you ever do a yoga class when you go on the road? Yeah, I have. Yeah. Yeah, I have. For a while when I was heav more heavily into it, I would, it was kind of cool. You come into town and find where it was and, you know, it was a cool little like, okay, that's the project. I'm going to do that, right? You know, that's a good move. That's a good move. something that like you just have an outlet, little thing that sort of connects you to what Tom Papa does. Right. Exactly. And then uh and then it's just the work. It's just taking your notebook and taking your notes and going over last night going over the Mhm. You know what I uh did for the first time uh this week? I listened to myself. I haven't I haven't recorded

158:22myself in a while. Really? Yeah. I was probably I always record but don't really listen to it unless I know I have to there was something I want to pick out. And uh I listened to myself on uh Sunday after the weekend and uh that was rough. You forget. You're like, "Oh yeah, I should be doing this all the time. It's so valuable. It's so incredibly valuable." Visually is even better. I know. If you can watch a video of yourself, then you go, "Oh my god, I look so gross. What? I got to I got to dress better." I Me, too. My posture sucks. Why don't I ever move my right arm? Why am I like a robot? This thing I'm doing with my hand in my pocket. Get it out of your pocket. Yeah. The at the uh Irvine Improv, the guy, he did every set and just hand them to me. I was like, "Oh, okay." Ice House does that, too? I was like, "Oh, thanks." Yeah. Have you uh performed at the recent

159:17Irvine Improv? The new one? Yeah. It's nice. Nice. really nice big ass like a theater. Yeah, Ken did his uh comedy special there. He recorded a special there. I was like, that's a good call. Yeah, it is a good call. That place is that place is hot. Yeah, looked great. The backstage was even great. That was a good spot. That town like Irvine is a town where there's so many people jammed into that area. It's shocking, isn't it? It is one of the most populated areas in Southern California. Like, where did you guys come from? Like me and my wife were talking about this the other day that there's such a big difference between driving up like where like Thousand Oaks is and driving down Orange County. Yeah. Like Thousand Oaks things lighten up considerably. That's right. You know, it's like horses and up there. But if you get down to like Lagona, good luck. I know. Good luck

160:10getting there in time. It's intense. Do you ever do gigs in uh San Diego? Yeah. that drive. You might as well just drive to the ocean and see if your car can make it see if your car could just drive on the edge of the water. I take the train a lot. You ever do that? No, I've never done that. But I was just thinking now. I wonder if you could drive in the ocean. Like if is Would they arrest you? What do they do if you're actually in the ocean and you're driving your car? They'd let you go. What kind of car? Well, if you have one of those cars that snorkel, that's what I'm thinking. If you got like one of them Toyota Land Cruisers, they put a snorkel on them. They drive through the river in the Amazon. Like you would think they'd let you go. The sharks might get you, but you do. They let you do that. Like how does that work? Like the the Coast Guard. K You can't just drive in the

160:57ocean. Probably not. I thought about the same thing in a similar vein. Can you just go on horseback down Ventura? Could you just get a horse and go to the bank that way? That's very That's a very good point. Could you just tie your horse up to the bike rack and walk inside and cash your check? Well, it's always weird if you go to Burbank and you see people riding their horses around Burbank. Burbank is an equestrian neighborhood. Yeah. My daughter was taking lessons over there for a little bit. What the f Okay, here. Look at this guy. Perth, Australia. Oh, that guy just drove right in. See, I'm just driving in. That's just stupid. You can't do that. Is this guy trying watch men drive car into the ocean? Get away from the cops, I think. Oh, he's trying to get away from the cops. Okay. Okay. Well, that's different. And so now he's uh driving off and the cops try to get him. So they

161:42drove right into the ocean. This guy's an idiot. See, the car doesn't it doesn't once the hood is underwater, you Good for him. That's what the snorkel's for. Go for it. But the thing is, look at the cops behind him like, well, he's going to hop out of the car and just swim. Yeah, he's out. But the thing is, if you if you have a car with a snorkel and he doesn't have a car with a snorkel, you can drive pretty far and they can't get you. Like you could stay out, but he could just drive next to you on the beach and go hang out. Eventually you got to come to the land. Yeah. Look at this crazy cluster of cops and the car. Is this in Australia or something? I knew. Of course. How did I know it was Australia? Did you say it? I think it said Perth at the beginning. Yeah. Okay, that's it. Because otherwise I'm like, there's no way. I just guessed. But why not just get a horse?

162:26Yeah. And go run your errands that way. How about an eagle? How about teach eagle to fly you around? Imagine if somebody just developed an eagle. Like look, grab onto his talons. Have you ever seen a pitbull that's like 190 lbs? Yeah. They're not supposed to be that big, right? Somebody made that. They bred those pitbulls until it became this ridiculous thing. Like the average size for a pitbull, like those fighting dogs, they're like 35 lbs. Like a big one's like 50. Really? Yeah. They're not big. So these monsters are like these are just chickens with giant breasts. Sort of. Yeah. Which also comes from selective breeding apparently. I thought the chickens with giant breasts were steroids, but uh this chicken farmer explained to me, "No." He goes, "You know how much how expensive it would be if they really pumped." It's like we have this idea, oh, they're putting all

163:09the hormones and Not really. No, no, no. I mean, they they would they would if they had to fix something. Too, but most of it is. Yeah. Most of it is they genetically engineer them. They selectively breed them so that they get they selectively breed them to the point where they could barely even walk. Those poor things Yeah. can't stay on their legs. So, for at least how this guy has explained it to me, it's mostly just selective breeding. Interesting. Why can't they do that with an eagle? Get a big ass eagle. Yeah. A big ass eagle. If you can teach an eagle to hunt for wolves for you. Have you ever seen them do that? No. Yeah. The Mongolians. Oh, really? They let an eagle loose and the eagle will fly down and jack a wolf. A wolf? A wolf? Those are big. They're not big enough. That's how gangster eagles are. I'm reading that book, The Hawk. What's that? This girl uh just loved um it's

164:02her autobiography basically. Just a writer out of Oxford and she is learning how to uh train a goshock. Oh. And uh falcons and all that kind of stuff with the hoods and very intricate about that whole practice. It's pretty intense. That's very intense. Yeah. Getting it to trust you and sit there in its hood. You have to be with it all the time. All the time. Yeah. Like in the beginning like for days. Mhm. Just sitting with it on your arm. You can't go on vacations. No. Yeah. You can't just take a month off. I'm just going to hang out with that. hawk will eat your face. This little hood. But why couldn't someone engineer an eagle that was your buddy that flies you around like an eagle? How does he fly you around on his back? Look at this wolf jacking. This is a wolf jacking an eagle. And then then the eagle comes down, jacks the wolf. Oh Look, they're both jacking too.

164:55This is insane. Yeah. So, the wolf was kicking the eagle's ass and his homie came in and backed him up. See, you shouldn't worry about the monkeys cuz these guys are doing this now. See, I thing is, man, these eagles are so goddamn tough and their claws are so terrifying. They essentially have knives that are growing out of their feet. They're dinosaurs, man. This is This is a dinosaur that made it, right? And it makes me wonder what dinosaurs actually looked like. Like we always assume that all dinosaurs were covered with scales like a crocodile. I'm sure a lot of them were. Look at this. See, they're duking it out. The eagle lands on them, starts jacking them. Jeez. And he's got him. He's got him by the neck. Oh my god. It's insane. He's killing a He's just got full mount on the wolf and he's clawing him to death. He's just keeping him at a distance. Yeah. And the eagle's

165:48He's got his neck. This is insane. It's insane that they can do this. That is nuts. That's a big ass eagle. That's a golden eagle. And that's a small wolf, by the way. Those are not as big as He looks like a mid dog. This is crazy, though, man. Oh, now what's he feeding him? He's giving him a reward. He's giving him some meat. Oh. Yeah. Oh, he's holding the glove with meat above the carcass. Gets him back on his arm. Yeah. Then the hood goes on. Yep. Wow. Jeez. What a wonderful but terrifying animal. It's a cool hobby, you know. It's not like making bread, but Where's his starter? They um they showed these they had these ancient homminid bones they found and they were trying to figure out why they had these claw marks on them and they were trying to figure out what animal had done it. And then they recognized very similar patterns of scrapes to what they find on small

166:43primates that are near harpy eagles. And they realized that early humans were most likely eaten by eagles. Really? Yeah. A bigger eagle, like a pterodactylized eagle, gang of different kinds of birds and large predatory birds. Yeah. In fact, North America like I believe before like I don't I don't want to say how long ago, but I don't think it was too long ago, like not even a million years, they had a thing called a terror bird. And a terra bird was like a giant 7 foot tall predatory bird that didn't fly. It was like a standing bird with a giant beak. Like a huge predatory Carl Malonesized bird. That's crazy. How about that? Let's make that movie. How about a Magic Johnson sized bird with a giant hatchet for a face? They're not even flying. I don't have to. Yeah, you should see that they do a superimposed image of the size of a normal human, like of a six foot tall

167:44human next to a terror bird, like what they looked like. I love terror bird. That's such a great name. And isn't it terrifying? And this is North America. This is right here. Jeez. Yeah. So, there's I mean, the entire fossil record, even just of mammals, is is not complete. There's they're always finding new things because in order to create a fossil, it's very difficult. Like, something has to happen. And you have to get caught in a mudslide or something. See if Jamie, see if we can find a terror bird picture. Yeah, I'd love to see this thing. Look at that thing. That's a soldier that gets eaten. That one on the left. That looks like where the wild things are. Yeah, it does, doesn't it? Yeah. That doesn't even look like it's a real thing. Look at the size of that thing. Its eggs must be huge. Oh my god. Like a head. Yeah. Bigger. Bigger. Look at the size of that Wasn't there a

168:36movie where people were riding those? Maybe. But it's interesting that one of them has fairly large wings, the one on the right, but the one on the left has like these nubs. Yeah. He's like, those are all different terror birds. Oh, Christ. Oh my god. Look at that thing in the the one in the forefront. The one that with the the evil red looking beak and the one in the background. It's like that one's like almost flamingo ostrich monster. Could you imagine if you were just walking along and you saw something popping its head out of the trees looking at you funny. It's that size and you go, "Oh my god, it's over. It's over." My cat's been on a bird killing spree. Good for her or him. Brings in a couple of week. Really? It's really out of hand. Well, you better be careful if you let your cat out cuz your cat get jacked by coyotes. I know. It's his It's his life.

169:26Wow. That's brutal. Claws or no claws? Claws. Yeah, it's got claws and you let him out. He just can't He just He's an outdoor He just He's a nut. He can't keep He's always been an outdoor cat. Yeah. Does he come inside at all? Yeah. Comes in. No, they do if you don't get them fixed quick enough. I have an indoor cat. Yeah, I have an indoor and an outdoor. Mine mine are both indoor cuz um I live in a place where a lot of coyotes are. I got my one of my chickens got jacked by a coyote. Really? Yeah. I watched it happen. Watch the coyote hop the fence with my chicken in his mouth. Yeah, we had a separate chickens get broody, which means they um they they get confused since they're not getting by roosters, right? Sometimes they think that they have an egg that they have to hatch that they have to uh you know what's it called? What's it called? Then nurture an egg to sit on

170:16it. Yeah, that's a technical term. Um something a gate. What's the word? Um just No, that's not it. Um um lay on top of what's it called? Like when you take an egg and you put it in one of those warming things. You um you know like that like lamp goes. People at home are listening to this screaming. You pad. You can't even remember. Incubate. Incubate. Incubate. Wow. I knew it was a bait. Yeah. I was I was trying to avoid the band Incubus. just like so I can't um but anyway um I remember it was thinking it was it was thinking that it so we have to take them out and she had to get outside of the regular chicken coupe. It's just a large coupe and you have to put her in one where she has to sit on a beam. Like it's very small and you for the amount of time they're broody that's how much time you have to put them in there. Otherwise they could be broody for like

171:17a month. They'll pull their their feathers out and you know they can cause some health issues. They pluck all the feathers out of their chest to feather their nest for an egg that's not going to hatch. Oh, they get a little wacky. Yeah, it's weird. Well, the brains are a thumbnail, right? So, uh, this coyote just figured out a way to get into that little cage and just jack Jack the chicken and jumped over the fence with it. Yeah. I mean, it's definitely a risk and a couple neighbors or one neighbor lost a cat, you know, like 10 years ago to it. It's not It's like the beginning of coyote. Like there's not a lot going on, but enough where if the cat's not smart, it could happen. But the cat is so happy and just that's just the way he lives. And it's like, you know, yeah, you know, everyone would be sad, but it's his life. Yeah. It's probably not the worst way to go either.

172:06Yeah. Quick rather than getting diabetes and cats get diabetes. Yeah. I had a diabetic cat. Whoa. Did you have to give it insulin? Yeah. Whoa. Every day? Uh-huh. Whoa. Twice cat was probably pissed at you. didn't. I had no idea. Why you shoot me with this needle, I want pets. Putting a pill on a like a stick and you have to fire it in its throat. That's how you do it. That's one of the thing that and the insulin. He probably scruff his neck. Did he run from you all the time? No, he was pretty mellow. He probably extended his life for another four years. Oh. And then uh it just all ended up failing. Yeah. But you know, it was like I would, you know, it was my wife's cat. I would have you would have ended it. Probably would not have been giving it shots for that long. Hatch it. What you What was the method? Just open the door and make coyote calls. No, it was a it was a

172:59nice cat. But yeah, I never knew there was this thing as a diabetic cat and uh yeah, we extended his life for a while and then uh you know they other things start to fail. Did you try feeding him a vegan diet? No. Supposed to cure diabetes? Oh yeah. No. Making things up. But people do have their cats and they feed them vegan food. Really? Yeah. Cats die young. Sad. Such so irony. In their attempt to not be cruel to animals, they're cruel to their animals. Starve their animal. Yeah. They're feeding it plums and celery and I just saw this 30-year-old dog yesterday on the internet. Have you ever heard of something that That's crazy. What kind of dog is it? It's a a It's an Australian. They can't prove how old it really is, but Oh, there's some video of I mean, it looks like it's 30 in dog ears. No, it's 30 in human ears, 200 in. That's only like What is that? Six

173:50years old. Oh, wow. That's crazy. 30. The owners must be like, "All right." But see here, there's no proof. As long as there's no proof and we're reading about this, we have no idea. No. How old that dog? This is a story. Like, that's the problem with goddamn stories is all you have to do is you get paid per ad clicks. Yeah, exactly. Just put a picture up and that's it. So, see like that. Three men who admit to raping a girl 17 won't be jailed. That's that's a lie too. Must read. And this guy's got his abs out there taking a photo. What are you trying to do? You trying to get me to click? Get me to click so they might not even be about that. No, associated with it and then someone will get paid. Tom Papa, we have run out of time here, my friend. Really? That goes so quick. I know. Those three hours of fun, my friend. That's crazy. That was great though. It really is crazy. I

174:38really enjoyed talking to you, man. Thank you. You know, I've been here once before and I've been itching to get back. It's such a good hang. I think this is better than our first one. Yeah, I really do. We learned a lot about starters. I learned about a lot about yeast and and muscle tissue. Now, you got to get on your stomach. Get me a pot. We'll do that. We'll do that when we get off the air. I'll show you how to do it so hard. All right, ladies and gentlemen, that's it for the week. You heard me, you folks. Next week, I've got four of them. So, straddle up. lot of loving starting with Cameron Haynes on Monday. Um my friend Doug Duran is coming next week. I got uh what? Noatu. Oh, Boss Rutin and Marl Ronaldo are going to be here and Robin Black. It's going to be a hell of a week, you